𝘏𝘌 , 𝘞𝘈𝘝𝘌𝘚.

𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘨𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦. ( archived. )

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this blog is now archived!

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this blog is now archived!

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this blog is now archived!

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this blog is now archived!

[korezni-a]

little heads-up :  i am very likely gonna move blogs next week since i’m feeling Not Good on this one .  memes and current threads would probs be continued tho!

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i’m gonna make little playlist edits for some of the dynamics i have on here ✨

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u know what peeps doomed surrealist fairytale prince is really just the n.ikolai l.antsov aesthetic

[jimimon-deactivated20220412]

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also wanted to say  :  if you ever want to unfollow me for whatever reason or you want to write with another writer’s portrayal instead of mine    ,    then you can always do that . there’s no message or anything needed here    ,   i get that sometimes you wanna focus on the people you plot and/or are friends with or another person’s interpretation of a character .  i’ll never hold it against anyone since this is supposed to be a hobby and your time on this site should be spent in the company you want to .  

[taggedmemes]

SENTENCE MEME ⟶ TAYLOR SWIFT / LOVER ( PART ONE, TRACKS 1 –– 9 ) always feel free to tweak the sentence to fit your muse.

“How many days did I spend thinking about how you did me wrong?”

“I couldn’t get away from you.”

“Then something happened one magical night.”

“I forgot that you existed.”

“I thought that it would kill me, but it didn’t.”

“It isn’t love, it isn’t hate, it’s just indifference.”

“I would’ve stuck around for you.”

“I would’ve fought the whole town.”

“But then you showed who you are.”

“You sent me a clear message and taught me some hard lessons.”

“Devils roll the dice and angels roll their eyes.”

“What doesn’t kill me makes me want you more.”

“No rules in breakable heaven.”

“It’s a cruel summer with you.”

“We say that we’ll just screw up in these trying times.”

“I’m al ways waiting for you just to cut to the bone.”

“If I bleed, you’ll be the last to know.”

“I’m drunk in the back of the car.”

“I cried like a baby coming home from the bar.”

“I said I was fine, but it wasn’t true.”

“I don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you.”

“I snuck in through the garden gate every night just to seal my fate.”

“I love you, ain’t the the worst thing you ever heard?”

“We could leave the Christmas lights up until January.”

“This is our place, we make the rules.”

“There’s a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you.’

“Have I known you twenty seconds or twenty years?”

“Can I go where you go?”

“Can we always be this close forever and ever?”

“I’m highly suspicious that everyone who sees you want you.”

“I’ve loved you three summers now, but I want ‘em all.”

“I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover.”

“My heart’s been borrowed and yours has been blue.”

“All’s well that ends well to end up with you.”

“I swear to be overdramatic and true.”

“You’ll save all your dirtiest jokes for me.”

“Every conquest I had made would make me more of a boss to you.”

“I’d be an alpha type.”

“I’m so sick of running as fast as I can.”

“If I was a man, I’d be the man.”

“They wouldn’t shake their heads and question how much of this I deserve.”

“What I was wearing, or . if I was rude, would all be separated from my good ideas and power moves.”

“What’s it like to brag about raking in dollars and getting bitches and models?”

“If I was out flashing my dollars, I’d be a bitch, not a baller.”

“They paint me out to be bad, so it’s okay that I’m mad.”

“I’m ready for combat.”

“I say I don’t want that,  but what if I do?”

“Cruelty wins in the movies.”

“I’ve got a hundred thrown out speeches I almost said to you.”

“Help me hold on to you.”

“Who could ever leave me, but who could stay?”

“I search for your dark side.”

“I cut off my nose just to spite my face, then I hate my reflection for years.”

“All of my heroes die all alone.”

“They see right through me.”

“Can you see right through me?”

“I see right through me.”

“All the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put me together again.”

“All of my enemies started out friends.”

“I think he knows.”

“He got that boyish look that I like in a man.”

“It’s like I’m 17, and nobody understands.”

“I wanna see what’s under that attitude.”

“I want you, bless my soul.”

“I’m not gonna tell him. I think he knows.”

“I’ll make myself at home, and he’ll want me to stay.”

“He better lock it down, or I won’t stick around.”

“Good ones never wait.”

“He’s so obsessed with me and I understand.”

“You know I adore you.”

“I’m crazier for you.”

“Now I’m feeling hopeless.”

“No cameras catch my pageant smile.”

“It’s been a long time coming.”

“It’s you and me, that’s my whole world.”

“She’s a bad, bad girl.”

“You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes.”

“We’re so sad, we paint the town blue.”

“Voted most likely to run away with you.”

“You are the only one who seems to care.”

“I’m feeling helpless, the damsels are depressed.”

“Boys will be boys, where are the wise men?”

“I’m scared.”

“I don’t want you to go.”

“I don’t really wanna fight.”

“The moon is high.”

“I went home and tried to stalk you on the internet.”

“I’ve read all the books beside your bed.”

“We played cat and mouse for a month, or two, or three.”

“I wake up in the night and watch you breathe.”

“Kiss me once ‘cause you know I had a long night.”

“I like shiny things, but I’d marry with you paper rings.”

“You’re the one I want.”

“I hate accidents, except when we went from friends to this.”

“I’m with you even if it makes me blue.”

“Without all the exes, fights, and flaws, we wouldn’t be standing here so tall.”

“I want your complications, too.”

“I want your dreary Mondays.”

“We were in the backseat drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar.”

“We were a fresh page on the desk, filling in the blanks as we go.”

“I hope I never lose you.”

“That’s the kind of heartbreak time could never mend.”

“I get mystified by how this city screams your name.”

“I’m so terrified of if you ever walk away.”

“I thought you were leading me on.”

“I packed my bags before you even knew that I was gone.”

“This scared new beginning, that became my religion.”

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we all know it’s my nik theme song but not me thinking about how ‘  and they'll take you down, they'll pick you clean   ,   if you stick around such a desperate scene .  ’    is a perfect stand in for how nik has felt during the time between coming back from his time in service and before going off to the sea aka the brief stint where he’s never been more miserable in his whole life and his family did jack and shit to help him!

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derryleader:

the writer realizes that his sudden interest in a past time usually taught to those at a young age was completely out of the blue   ,   &   a bit surprising. honestly   ,   he too was a little amused by his sudden need to have the captain   ,   his captain   ,   show him exactly how one glides across the dance floor to a steady pattern   &   rhythm   ,   or in their case   ,   the upper deck. anyone who had ever known bill prior to his life out on the sea would have told you that such a desire for such daring   &   strange things was incredibly unlike him   ,   his reputation as a melancholy   ,   lonely   &   quiet man well known throughout his small village. everyone knew of his younger brother’s death  &   how the whole thing broke the whole denbrough family apart   ,   eventually leading to the premature death of his parents. everyone saw him as this sad   ,   almost unapproachable man   ,   &   he could never   ,   ever find an interest in something so innocent as dancing. of course   ,   that was the old bill denbrough   ,   the one he left behind on land the moment sturmhond listened to him plead his case  ,   bill’s talent for words the key to granting him a place in his crew. this bill denbrough had a zest   &   love for life   ,   smiling more genuinely as the days passed   ,   feeling confidant   &   daring than he ever has in all his life. the open seas gave him a freedom he never knew one could possess   &   he had the great captain to thank for all of this. without him   ,   none of this could have ever hope to be possible. sturmhond was a name he had been familiar with in his travels on foot   ,   never once imagining that he would one day work under the captain   ,   the man quickly becoming one of the few   ,   close friends he’s ever had. any moment spent with him always made his heart swell just a touch   ,   even if his facial expressions said otherwise when feigning annoyance. the man did have a tendency to be a bit full of himself   ,   boasting about his looks constantly in a manner that often makes the writer laugh.   ‘   women often dream of me   ,   ‘   was a quip he once used in casual conversation   &   bill vividly remembers the loud bark of a laugh that spilled from his lips   ,   struggling to hide it from the crew   ,   embarrassed. but there was no need to be embarrassed over such things    ,   now was there   ?   he could laugh as loud as he wanted to hear   ,   howl along with the rest of them whenever a mission goes as planned   &   he does  ,  which for him   ,   is incredibly freeing. a lot of his changed demeanor had to do with his new life at sea    &   his friendship with the captain   ,   never once really speaking on it aloud   ,   &   he’s honestly not so sure why he’s never talked about it. certainly it would boost his ego   ,   just about anything did   ,   but he deserved to know how good he made bill feel. no one’s ever made him smile or laugh as much as he did   &   even if he tries to deny it   ,   there was always a smile chasing after the playful roll of his eyes. maybe   ,   just maybe   ,   one would find a hint of color in his cheeks whenever they were close   ,   but it was hard to say. the busy work of being on board didn’t leave much time for shaving   ,  not only succeeding in making him look older than he was   ,   but hiding that feature from others who may question him. it worked in his favor honestly   ,   as no one needed to know about his own feelings   ,   the ones that even he himself was unaware of. adventure was what he was after   ,   wanting nothing more to be apart of something that he could record for generations to love   &   enjoy. it never occurred to bill that on top of their already amazing adventures   ,   there was another one about to transpire between the two of them.

part of him expects sturmhond to deny his request   ,   being that it was already so late   &   he more than likely wanting to sleep to prepare for the next day’s work. color him very pleased when he takes his hand in his   ,   more than happy to allow the captain to situate him as needed  ,   never faltering as a hand presses against his firm back   ,   keeping himself steady as the boat gently rocked against the calm waves of the sea   ,   the twinkling stars above them serving as a perfect replacement for the chandeliers   &   bright lights one would usually find in a ballroom. everything was enjoyable   &  exciting   ,   the anticipation bubbling deep within his core   ,   until the captain reveals that bill would be taken the lead. then he finds himself finally faltering   ,   looking at his captain as if he had lost his mind. ❝   i don’t think that’s such a good idea   ,   kapitan   ,   ❞   the writer begins with a raised eyebrow   ,   keeping the taller man close   &   ——   wow   ,   they’ve never really been this close before have they   ?   this was definitely new   ,   &   the writer finds himself having to look away for a moment   ,   suddenly a little shy about what they were about to do. he was reverting back to the old bill denbrough   ,   but why   ?   dancing was nothing to be shy of   ,   &   he should be able to master it with the captain’s guidance. why was his confidence faltering now   ?  ❝   you want the inexperienced dancer to lead   ?   you thick in the head   ?   ❞   the query comes in a soft   ,   loving tone   ,   fingers flexing as they keep them pressed against his back   ,   feeling the way his muscles moved even with just the slightest bit of movement. one on one time with his captain was one thing   ,   but this   ?   this was taking it to a whole other level.   ❝   s - s -sturmhond.   ❞   bill finds himself struggling to speak   ,   his stutter returning in the wake of new nerves setting in   ,   eyes closed shut as he silently berates himself   ,   wishing this horrible habit of his wasn’t so embedded into him his poor mother   ,   saints rest her   ,   tried so hard to teach him how to speak properly   ,   but it only worsened after georgie was gone   ,   &   with his mother’s sudden disinterest in him   ,   he just never had a chance to improve. it was tragic   &   a bit embarrassing   ,   making for crucial moments like these all the more dreadful for the writer   ,   a wordsmith with a pen   ,  but not so much with his tongue.   ❝   okay. t - tell me how to m - m - move my f - feet. i’m frozen here   ,   g - g - guide me on h - how to lead y - y - y - you.   ❞   he sighs   ,   one hand in his loosening just a bit   ,   feeling already a bit defeated before they began.   ❝    s - s - sorry   ,   ❞   he tries to smile apologetically    ,   but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes.   ❝   i d - don’t know what’s come over m - m - me.   ❞

the sea has room for everyone     ,     a  place for every lonely soul .   it is always there to meet those willing to throw themselves into its wildness as well as its soft laps against skin or wood     ,      always there to meet those willing to dive headfirst into the brute coldness of the stream    ,     into its depth .   he has always been the one to fling himself into the waves     ,      always rather the drowning man than the peculiar onlooker    ,     and there’s enough weight in this alone to justify and explain why he chose the ocean for his adventurous disappearance .    or just for his adventures .    some in the crew described their captain with the old saying of having sea salt in his veins and maybe they are not too far off     ,      maybe there is something to it     ,     maybe that could be the meaning to why his blood is supposed to be blue     -     rather than the royal status usually attributed to the phrase that he kept neatly under wraps .  he always had a particular fascination with the sea and then it has been the one place he knew his family wouldn’t look for him once they thought he’d be shipped off to university .    they were happy enough to get rid of him anyway    -     no use for the grieving and shambled remnants of who he used to be    -     and his mother has been the only one at least feigning laments for his early departure after coming home from his time in service .    she was glad to see him home    ,      for the moment she could still keep the idea of who she thought he was in her mind     ,      and then it has been the ugly and poignant truth that no one in his family has experienced for years and years now     ,     for generations    ,      and neither the queen nor the king nor the first son could deal with the ruined thing coming home from the borders .   all of them more than happy to see him gone again    ,     neither of them even seeing through the con he would play on them .    well     ,     all the better for him .   having his ship now     ,    having his crew that he trusts and that are more family than anyone else could have ever been    (     except for the one ghost hauntingly rattling in his rib-cage    )      ,      having the waves beneath his feet and having the wind rushing past his ears    ,     and the stars over his head .    what else could he want?   it is the best thing that has ever happened to him    ,     the best decision he ever made     ,     and he knows he will always hold both the people and his surroundings in his heart .   for the rest of time    ,      for as long as he could think .   this has been his rebirth    ,     his own rebellion    -     and it saved him .    and it made him more honest and braver and better     ,    he knows .   to share it with people like the twins    ,     with people like bill too    ,     who make him feel so understood and at home with every look and every laugh and every word .   especially the writer being the recent reason for the warmth the captain could feel in his chest    ,    the happiness in his heart    ,    the smile crossing over tailored features     -     oh    ,   nikolai knows what is happening to him here but he doesn’t want to hold it back .   the sea holds most of his heart     ,     but he could let someone else have the rest .

the smile stays on his face in their new proximity     ,     knowing that while it must seem daunting at first     -     every new situation does     -     that bill would excel too .   and he hasn’t lied when he said he’s a good dancer    ,    countless and countless hours spent in one of the many rooms in os alta’s grand palace spent with dance lessons of every possible kind    ,    varying from the slow waltz to even the basic instructions of ballet    (     with a partner   ,    of course!    )     but mainly staying with the classic ballroom dancing when he was in his teens .    and it has stuck    ,     the prince finding some surprising amount of fun and enjoyment in the task     ,     liking the freedom he had in the set boundaries of movements     ,     liking the possibility to move at all instead of standing stiff at the wall like he’s seen so many dukes or advisors do during all those royal parties and banquets .   it’s one of the very few things he misses from his time back in the palace    ,     the countless evenings filled with possibilities to dance that he’d always take since his mother’s entourage liked to take a turn with him in the ballroom at least once .    yes     ,      each and all of them .    and while he usually didn’t like to play songbird for them    ,    he wouldn’t say no to dancing .    and now    ,     this little moment carrying itself all the way past shoreline and onto the sea    ,     he is far more pleased with his current dance partner than he’s ever been and they haven’t even started .   his hand on bill’s shoulder remains where it is     ,      the other that is still entangled with the writer’s giving his palm a squeeze .   everything that would help to reassure and calm him     ,      nikolai      -      sturmhond    -      wanting him to have a good experience now that he wants to learn it .   “   i want the inexperienced dancer to do what is easier .   it’s usually easier for people to pick up on leading than following    ,     most want to move first and not second .   our brains are more wired for action than reaction    -     and i want to ease you into all of this .   so    ,     don’t worry    ,    you’re going to do well .   believe me .”   voice kind and warm    ,     the hand on bill’s shoulder loosening for index finger to touch under his chin lightly   ,    tilting his head up a little with the motion before returning to the standard posture .   “  rule number one :  look at me    ,    not at your feet .   then   ,    take a step forward with your right foot   ,    then move your left one forward diagonally .  right one to the left   ,    left one back .  the right one goes back to where you started and then the left follows with a move to the right .   it’s like a circle    ,    really just doing the same steps back and forth .   we can do it slowly   -    and don’t worry about me either   ,    i know how to follow .   we’ll do it until you feel sure .   you trust me    ,     don’t you?”   and then he motions for bill to begin moving    ,    looking at him with that assuring smile still .

[korezni-a]

derrycompass:

a muffled laugh threatens to sound from tight lips.  how kind of him to decide to concern himself with eddie’s woes.  does he,  eddie wonders,  realize that leaves him with little room to disagree?  to argue?   (  if he were inclined to that sort of thing.  )   and yet nikolai does say it kindly,  with the sort of stalwart warmth the word noble ought to conjure up.  the lines heavy on his face seem to soften and eddie shifts his weight as a sigh wheezes through his delicate frame.   ❝  she writes.  often.  my mother is a…  ❞   how does one put it?   ❝  a verbose woman.  ❞   perhaps the kindest descriptor sonia kaspbrak has ever faced.  but the weight of the guilt,  of the undeniable edge in his voice,  threatens to crush what little air there is left within his lungs and eddie deflates.  he offers the other man a thin smile.   ❝  my family holds a bit of land north of here.  i came here when i was young,  yes,  but she would kill me if i did not keep up with correspondence.  ❞

there is a wall between him and everyone he talks to    ,     always saying and doing the wrong thing by default of being who he is    ,     and he can feel it now as well .   he wonders if the healer talks to him because he wants to or because he feels obliged to      -     a constant question .    you haven’t had friends since dominik died    ,     and now you feel like the whole world would die too if you’d try again .   but he shakes the thought away    ,    instead turning more towards eddie while still keeping his body one angular line away   ,    a boundary    ,    trying not to impose while he is imposing .   “   your mother couldn’t actually kill you as long as you here    ,    the guards wouldn’t let her in .   no one would    -    not when she’s a threat and she sounds like one .”    making a face then   ,   fox’s mouth turning down   ,    he reels back .   not your place .   “    i am sorry    -    that was  ...   rude .  and an assumption .  but    -     my parents are possibly the most prominent case of the polar opposite of verbose when it comes to some of their children and i think both aren’t healthy or good .   for a family    ,    for anyone    ,    really .  it’s very painful     ,     being hurt by the people that you think should love you unconditionally . ”

[korezni-a]

@tracydraco​ said    :     ❝ do you remember ― three years ago, i think? before the gooseincident but after the time you were thrown from your horse for being an arse ― but do you remember when we were nearly robbed but you managed to convince them that we had actually already been robbed and so were hardly the worth the trouble at all? that was very impressive. i think that was the day i first noticed you're a bit clever. ❞ 

a smile blooms over tailored features like summer rain      ,      slow and welcoming    ,     maybe even a slight edge found in it .   she’s talking loudly    ,    loud enough the maybe the whole market place can hear it     -     but more so that anyone in earshot wouldn’t think of any royal breeding when looking at either of them .   horse riding?  no    ,     not the long days on the estate’s grounds but only ever as a form of travel .   the goose incident?  did happen   ,     but it sounds more like a farm incident here than actually accidentally setting a whole array of wild geese on their tail .   nearly robbed?   more about robbing others with enough money than being threatened    ,      though the aftermath was a little ugly .    he laughs then    ,    at the last comment    ,     and it’s bright and loose and candid     ,     unlike anything he’s learned to release in the palace during his youth .    here     ,     it’s everything he held back .    here     ,     it suits the situation .    tracy’s got a way of getting that laugh out of her    -     ever since they met their match on that damned shoreline and vowed to do something about their life she’s been a constant .    the good kind    ,     thankfully .   “   well    ,”     he begins   ,    looking down to her    ,     grin still evident .   “   i am glad i could convince yourself i’m not an idiot     ,     that finally will make me sleep better at night .   you barely managed to turn that around to not affront my sensible ego .   although   ,    i didn’t make an arse of myself on that horse .   you only set it off with your own .   but    ,    semantics .   it’s a relief to hear we both seem to think the other holds some form of valuable intellect .   will make the rest of the traveling easier .”

[korezni-a]

you're really fantastic

merci vielmal , that’s kind of u to say! 💛

[korezni-a]

actssassin:

the work of a dedicated king never seemed to cease   ,   the piling demands   &   needs of his people forever unrelenting   ,   taking it’s toll as it all laid on the young king’s shoulders. it pained the bodyguard to see him like this   ,   suffering at the hands of his own devotion   &   dedication to the work   ,   sleep   &   relaxation constantly eluding him   ,   making moments like this where he had enough time   &   energy to spend with barry all the more special. nikolai only asked one thing of him tonight   ——   to stay close   ,   &   barry as his servant   &   lover was eager to make due on that plea   ,   determined to help keep his thoughts away from the ever piling workload he’d no doubt have to face again come next morning. he notes the way darkened fingers twist into the front of his shirt   ,   clinging on tight while the other sneaks under his shirt   ,   the coolness of his fingertips grazing across his soft stomach enough to earn him a soft   ,   pleased hum from his lips   ,   audible enough only for him.   ❝   you work so hard   ,   baby   ,   ❞   he purrs against his skin   ,   letting teeth graze against the skin of his shoulder   ,   teasing the king a touch before pressing a kiss to the crook of his neck   ,   behaving enough not to bite him more than he already has. it would be very un - kingly like if he were to go on to do his daily activities sporting a visible bruise   ,   &   it would be obvious to those closest to him who the culprit of that mark would be. still   ,   barry hadn’t forgotten his lover’s plea for him to be closer   &   slowly he begins to set a plan in motion to do just that   &   more. the bodyguard lifts his head up to press an innocent kiss to his temple   ,   the gesture sweet   &   loving before he presses a hand up to his clothed chest   ,   pushing him down until he was flat on his back   ,   a few adjustments made before barry finally had him in the middle of the bed   ,   whole body resting on the mattress with golden crown laying on lavish satin pillows. it doesn’t take long before the bodyguard joins him   ,   crawling over like a cat of sorts as he finds his perch above the ravkan ruler   ,   reaching for his hand again   &   pinning it above his head as he leans in forward   ,   kissing his cheek   ,   the line of his jaw   ,   everywhere aside from the lips   &   purposefully so.   ❝   i think   ,   ❞   he starts in a low tone   ,   gaze hidden but if nikolai were to see   ,   he’d note just how heavy   &   dark bright blue eyes have become.   ❝   i’m just gonna … yeah …   ❞   barry’s voice trails off as continues to ply adoring kisses across scarred skin   ,   movements soft   &   languid   ,   allowing them both the chance to savor   &   enjoy their evening together   ,   for who knew when they would have an opportunity like this ever again with the king’s busy schedule. they’d find a way   ,   they always did   ,   &   while barry’s never commented on it   ,   he has noticed how the king always made room for him as often as he can   ,   even if it meant paying for it doubly the next day. all the more reason why he deserved this. pressure is applied to the hand he keeps pinned above his head   ,   not meant to harm   ,  but for the king to feel his strength   ,   feel the sensation. if he recalls   ,   nik liked this sort of thing   &   seeing as he was meant to try   &   keep his mind off of stressful things   ,   barry may as well indulge him.   ❝   you’re beautiful   ,   you know   ,   ❞   the bodyguard mumbles sweetly   ,   nose bumping against his chin as he kisses up a trail along his throat   ,   stopping short below his bottom lip   ,   once again eluding his kiss.   ❝   the most beautiful guy i’ve ever seen.   ❞

nowhere else does he feel so safe     ,      so loved     ,      so understood than when he is with barry .   it’s something that is still surprising him and that he still can’t get enough of     ,     being allowed to love the other man with all he has and feeling that he is getting the same love in return     ,      that their feelings are on the same page .  it is the last thing he worries about     ,     knowing that their love for each other is such a steady and strong thing that it couldn’t be shaken so easily or dismissed by anyone or anything .   and he knows it best in those quiet moments     ,     when they are leaning on each other     ,     when they can converse nearly without words because they know each other so well by now .   he can let go of some of the heavy things he constantly grasps at when he’s with his boyfriend    ,      can forget about the weights pushing down his shoulders and his mind for one moment or even an evening    -    and he’d never take for granted how willing barry always is to accommodate him     ,     may it be on a day with long working hours late into the night or one like today when he just needed a break from all of it .   they have to fight for the time they can have together as it is     ,      but sometimes the king just wanted to use some of the authority he has to not fight for it all the time and just take .   even if that means hell to pay the next day with little sleep or yawning into his breakfast tea    ,     but why be king when you couldn’t use all of what that entails for self-indulgence?   to be like anybody else for once and just enjoy the time he has with the person he loves .   leaning into the other’s touch easily    ,    heavy exhale as he feels teeth graze against his shoulder    ,    he’s peering up curiously to find out what barry is up to     -     nikolai would take anything he’d give him tonight     ,     just wanting to be with him     ,    even if that would only include falling asleep next to each other on the duvet .   but barry seems to have a more elaborate scheme in my mind and nikolai is more than glad to let himself be lad    ,     finding himself in the middle of the bed after a moment and the other man over him    ,     a sensation he always likes to indulge in    ,    likes to see and feel .    “    what do you have in that mind of yours now    ,    moi rezku?   ”    he asks with raised brows    ,      but shuts up rather soon when he feels his hand being taken and pressed into the mattress above his head .   it makes something stir in his chest    ,    like someone tugging at a hard knot there and untangling it    ,     like he’s overstretched those particular muscles and lets them all go at once   ,   and the feeling only increases when the guard sets out to kiss every inch of scarred skin on fox’s face and beyond .   one hand reaching out to run through the dark strands at the back of barry’s head affectionately and maybe for leverage    ,    eyes close momentarily    ,    light disappointment making his mouth curl upwards when he feels barry’s lips everywhere but on his .   “   and yet not beautiful enough to kiss    ,    i gather?”   he teases   ,    but the warm tone in his low voice enough to betray how much hearing the sentiment means to him .   

[korezni-a]

molnitsa:

         THREE  YEARS  UNDER  EACH  OTHER’S  WATCHFUL  EYE  .  one  year  to  rebuild  and  two  to  come  together  .   learning  each  others  intricacies  :  sharing  secrets  /  sharing  scars .  in  no  way  was  she  intended  to  be  by  his  side  .  a  girl  born  from  nothing  with  lightning  in  her  veins  and  the  golden  son  of  ravka  —  perhaps  not  the  one  promised  but  noble  all  the  same  (  more  than  any  full-blooded  monarch  she  had  the  displeasure  of  encountering  )  YET  HOW  ALIKE  WE  HAVE  GROWN  TO  BE  .  no  matter  their  beginnings  ;  are  we  not  all  things  ?  you  and  i  .  the  sea  and  the  sky  .  waves  and  rain  .  true  blue  as  ocean  depths  /  as  cloudless  day  .   pure  nature  ,  maybe  even  pure  disaster  ,  yet  they  shelter  one  another  :  steel  over  steel  .   commander  and  crown  ,  the  only  two  conscious  of  the  tender  bits  which  lay  beneath  the  armor  .  ❛  don’t  —  ❜  halting  him  with  her  words  /  with  her  tempering  hands  .  his  tightening  grasp  and  her  fingertips  soothing  across  his  cheekbone  .  ❛  you  know  i’m  not  a  woman  who  goes  back  on  her  word  and  i’ve  never  been  so  sure  of  something  so  reckless  in  my  life  .  ❜  (  reckless  .  no  ,  practical   )  it  was  neither  it  was  all  want  ,   a  notion  the  squaller  had  denied  since  the  moment  she  became  aware  of  her  growing  affection  for  the  king  .   BECAUSE  IT  WAS  NOT  PRACTICAL  —  BECAUSE  ALLOWING  HER  HEART  TO  BE  BROKEN  TWICE  WOULD  NOT  HELP  BETTER  SERVE  HER   COUNTRY  .  and  in  return  for  her  service  ?  fear  ,  distrust  that  devastated  a  whole  army  /  that  created  a  witch  (  but  in  the  wreckage  i  found  you  .  i  loved  you  in  the  wake  of  ruination  ,  as  if  my  silent  devotion  could  heal  a  ravaged  nation  )  once  more  his  confession  is  a  tide  washing  over  her  shores  .  she  can  scarcely  believe  the  strength  of  his  current  /  dragging  her  out  ,  wrapping  around  her  body  (  rainwater  mingling  with  sea  salt  )  ❛  you  dolt  ,  once  i’m  queen  you  won’t  be  able  to  even  dream  of  another  wife  .  ❜  lips  parting  into  a  grin  ,  tinge  of  melancholy  ,  still  her  voice  is  perfect  silk  .  ❛  i  will  be  magnificent  —  but  it  won’t  be  because  of  our  people  .  ❜  coming  together  resting  skin  upon  skin  .  a  mist  threatening  to  cloud  the  deep  cobalt  of  her  eyes  though  she  refuses  the  impulse  to  look  away  from  him  .  YOU  ARE  A  LOST  GIRL  /  YOU  ARE  A  SOLDIER  AND  THEY  WILL  CROWN  YOU  IN  THORNS  ;  let  them  .  ❛  it  will  be  because  of  you  .  ❜  she  kisses  him  then  as  tears  threaten  to  fall  —  when  she  was  a  child  she  had  dreamt  of  power  .  now  ,  she  craved  understanding  :  the  venture  of  being  intimately  known  ,  which  appeared  more  elusive  than  battle-won  competence  (  o’  but  i  have  found  it  .  i  have  found  him  .  he  is  sun-soaked  and  warm  )  ❛  because  i  will  always  love  you  more  than  this  ungrateful  country  .  ❜  she  says  it  against  his  lips  ,  exhaling  it  into  his  lungs  .  wrapped  in  the  heavy  weight  of  resentment  but  also  hope  ,  the  thread  that  kept  the  frayed  edges  of  him  all  together  ,   she  wants  to  get  tangled  in  it  too  .    

he believes they could find their way through anything      ,      could find their ways towards each other no matter what may be in the way of a shared destination .   they have proven so time and time again     ,     making it through the worst      ,     making it through the rubble and the pain and the ruins surrounding them and stacked inside of them      -      all fading to afterthoughts when they are together .   they could heal each other with a single touch     ,    they could grant each other peace with their shared moments .   and their words   ,   while filled with quips and bribing sometimes     ,    always honest with each other .   always something meant for the other     ,     something to hold onto or something to walk on    ,      but never not there .   this is what they have proven to each other and their country    :     to be there when it counts     ,     even after this country walked all over them and nearly drowned them    ,    nearly killed them     ,      and never thanks them .    they have weathered any storm    ,     they have made it through the fire     ,      through the dark     ,     and they are still standing together .    closer than before     ,      closer than ever     -     and he would not want it any other way .   he would do it all again if he’d come out of it with her together  .   the storm witch and the pirate king    ,    what an unlikely pair they make    ,     but maybe this is where and why they work .    “    no    ,     you aren’t .    but i wanted you to know that you could    -     you can .    this is a little different than a call for arms    ,     if you know what i mean  .   ”    it’s the last reassurance     ,      reminding her again that he would never hold it against her if she couldn’t do it     ,     if her past would come back to haunt her future     -     he is the last one to hang her up on it .   he’d take her lightning     ,     he’d take the brute force of her storms    ,     he’d take the thunder she brings along her with every step     -     anything she gives to him     ,      she’d offer him      ,      let him have .    never has he been afraid of her thorns or her magnificence      ,       always more enthralled by her unapologetic and sincere way than he’s ever been by anyone or anything else .   other men    ,     other people    ,     may wish to dim her down or to soften her edges    ,    but he could not imagine her any other way .   could not know if he’d love any deceiving version of her and not the storm she inhabits    ,    wholly herself .   “   i’m not even dreaming of another wife now .   i never could when you’re around .  ”   answered grin   ,     leaning into the touch against his cheek .   she finds tenderness with him and yet he would throw himself into her thorns readily .   “   and you already are magnificent all by yourself    ,     then you’ll just have a title that fits all that you are .   to me    ,    at least .   i don’t care about anyone else   ,   actually .   i want this with you because it’s you . ”   hazel gaze clear and loving before he lets himself be kissed    ,     answers her mouth with his     ,     letting the encompassing rain of happiness wash over him for once as he pours all his devotion and understanding into the kiss .   lets her know he doesn’t want    ,     doesn’t love anyone else .