as requested by anon. Find the original holiday starters here ( x ). Feel free to change pronouns or anything else !
“The holiday is one day, people! Twelve days at most. Why do people put up their tree right after Thanksgiving?”
“People are so sensitive. So what if I tell kids that Santa isn’t real? They deserve to know the truth.”
“My gingerbread house keeps falling.”
“Two words: Bah. Humbug.”
“I hate buying gifts. I never know what to get people.”
“Merry Christmas? Yeah, it’s fucking jolly.”
“There’s no way Santa could deliver presents to EVERY house in one night.”
“All I’m saying is, I’m being forced to spend time with my family. And that sucks.”
“I’m not greedy or anything, but Christmas is expensive.”
“I’ve never had a merry Christmas in my entire life.”
“Should I dye my hair green? I’ve been called ‘Grinch’ like forty times today.”
“It’s…the most overrated holiday.”
“People leave their lights up for WAY too long.”
“I’m not a grinch. You’re just a Christmas sheep.”
“I thought this holiday was about Jesus. Where the fuck did all the flying reindeer come from?”
“The only good Christmas movie is ‘The Nightmare Before Christmas’ because it’s a Halloween movie.” / “Actually, the only good Christmas movie is ‘Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer’.”
“All those Christmas decorations are so extra.”
“The only thing good about Christmas is the egg nog.”
“Mrs. Clause can fuck right off.”
“Why should I have to buy a present for everyone I know?”
“Look at those smiling faces…disgusting.”
“Call me a Scrooge if you want, but at least I’ll have money for rent once the holiday season is over.”
“I’ve never had any spirit, especially not Christmas spirit.”
“I would fight Rudolph any day.”
“Every time I see red and green, I feel like puking.”
“You know those kids who cry when they sit on Santa’s lap? I relate to them.”