‘aw, man. ·how harsh, huh...’ he muses silently, words hushed beneath delusory breath. he’s really done it now, huh? it was just like him to mock her at all the wrong moments. go figure, his mind chants, cynical tone reverberating in-between the walls of his consciousness. she asked-- pleaded for his company and he proved to her just why she shouldn’t. but! but, he knows this already, from the moment he steps into the room he knows he’ll push her further-- further; he always does. it’s just how it is, their relationship, and someone as powerless as kano can’t do anything to change the fate of his interactions, right? (except lie, maybe, pfft...) and hey, look on the bright side-- at least now she’ll know who to rely on and who not to rely on, right? it’s better this way.
kano’s smile doesn’t fade, it’s still, he mimics a jest while leering at her taller figure (·by, what, an inch?·), slowly sitting up from his nonchalant position on the ground, flicking dust off his knees in swift, cool movements. ( he looks obnoxious. ) he’ll stare ahead at her, eyes unwavering, expression unchanging despite the sharp words she spews at him. when he finally speaks it’s bitter, and without navigating through his thoughts clearly he’ll state: ‘i see.’ ·tone is hardly icy, countenance can’t be anything worthy of mentioning-- but the placidity of his meaningless words is what makes it so odd in contrast. hahaha, he was practically digging his own grave-!!
· · ·‘do you hate me for it?’·
and he leaves it at that; staring forward with a smile that almost looked stoic. the silence would have devoured him by now, so luckily she’ll fill it with her angry, angry words. he hates that he’s pushed to act like her sudden act of emotion and passion is·funny to him, even though it’s not, it’s a very genuine thing and above all else he takes her very seriously. but it’s not surprising when the bitterest of laughs emits, he’s worthless anyways, so naturally he’ll have no manners whatsoever when someone he cares about is in a rare fragile state. leave it to kano to do exactly what he shouldn’t.
he knows his mind is dark-- he’s never been able to sort through it, so he just soaks in it because he finds he’s already reached his downfall and this·“darkness” of his·devouring him is inevitable. he just doesn’t want it to devour others. he just doesn’t want to drag people along with him, down to an endless pit of everything disgraceful that he is, the worst in him that he’s sure by now has expanded to become his entire being. and he especially doesn’t want her to. understanding means knowing and knowing means helping when you’re family, and he prefers to lose this battle all by himself. why pit kido along with him, why allow her to understand when some things are better left unsaid? when she’ll over-involve herself and everyone else, when she’ll try her best to help him and all it’ll get him is getting to see her face when she fails.
some people just can’t be saved. it’s not a bad thing, though, the sins he committed were, ultimately, for the greater good. he can’t say ayano would be proud of him, but he can’t say anyone would feel anything positive or accepting if they really truly understood him. it’s not like he’s first in line to understanding himself either, because he doesn’t, he just has a pretty good idea of how deplorable he is, that’s all. really!
his arm stings a bit when she squeezes the life out of it, kano never realized how truly sharp fingernails were until they were digging into his skin. it doesn’t really hurt all that much, so it doesn’t weaken him or anything or cause his mask to fall, and even it did, he’s gotten pretty good at lying without any special powers. practice makes perfect.
· · ·‘okay, okay! you got me,
· · · ·i’m on my way out-- sheesh!
· · · ·kido, you don’t have to squeeze so hard,
· · · ·you know, im delicate, anyway~...’
he gives his arm a soft shake, signaling for her to let go, so he can be on his merry way. even kano knows when to quit, when he’s done enough damage. and he really didn’t want to talk about ayano anymore. it's never been his favorite subject of conversation. silly danchou! she should know genuineness is hardly kano’s strong-suit! and oh man, how worked up he got about all of this...! he’ll be sure to shake his fist at her in the morning, maybe even tsk a little. or maybe sweep this whole ordeal under the rug like nothing happened. he’s not sure what would piss her off more.·
guess he’ll find out! things are taking quite an interesting turn. she just has to let go of his arm first.
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