Jules of Nature
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Kiana Khansmith
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Keni
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@kynomancy-blog
hey everyone, a few people have asked my friends and partner how i’m doing so i just want to let you know i’m alright! i’m keeping my new blog on the down low for now because of things that have happened but i will probably post the link over here eventually. if you discover me, no worries, but please do send me a message to ask about following before you do. i’ll try to post updates soon. kiss kiss
i’m remaking, please send me a message if you want the url but i’m only gonna be responding to requests from people i know for now for safety reasons. i don’t feel comfortable explaining the situation here but this is temporary
we don’t have to be mutuals as long as i recognize your url/have interacted with you before
i’m remaking, please send me a message if you want the url but i’m only gonna be responding to requests from people i know for now for safety reasons. i don’t feel comfortable explaining the situation here but this is temporary
we don’t have to be mutuals as long as i recognize your url/have interacted with you before
i’m remaking, please send me a message if you want the url but i’m only gonna be responding to requests from people i know for now for safety reasons. i don’t feel comfortable explaining the situation here but this is temporary
i’m sorry but i really don’t have the skills to negotiate a murder-suicide threat. to the anon who just sent me that message i just... strongly encourage you to reconsider. whatever you’re going through right now isn’t fair but it also definitely isn’t fair to take it out on anyone else. i know things are hard but this is not the solution. please talk to me if you can, i really want this to go differently.
#suicide
i was oddity shopping today and i saw a wolf skull replica and thought of you neirin
yes... this is correct
we did have to watch a video in which this old nt dude talked about how his schizophrenic son had “come back from the dead” and had been “gone for ten years” while he was ill which was frankly very insulting and alienating. we don’t up and die when we’re ill, we’re still the same god damn people with feelings and desires
i’m back.... it was alright but i was the only schizophrenic there which was weird because a bunch of the material we were looking at kept talking about schizophrenia specifically. also it was very “anyone can recover if they just Believe Hard Enough” which was very, um, lol. their definition of recovery wasn’t bad tho, it was focused more on living a fulfilling life than eliminating symptoms
i have to go to this program called “your recovery journey” today at the transition people’s behest and i am anticipating it being pretty boring and unrelatable but who knows, maybe i will be pleasantly surprised
hi wolf mom. i'm psychotic. my crush has experienced psychosis but as a result of drug abuse-- how do they overlap? are we both crazy or is my crush ex-crazy? help!! i'm afraid to ask about any specific feels for fear i might out myself as totally off my rocker.
well, a couple things: psychosis caused by drug abuse can be chronic and continue after the drug abuse has stopped, so unless your crush has explicitly said they no longer experience it it’s quite possible that it’s ongoing. i can’t say whether your crush would or should identify as “crazy” but just in my experience people who have experienced psychosis as a result of drug abuse are generally a lot more understanding of the experience than the average person. it might feel really good to have a conversation comparing your experiences, and if they get weird about your psychosis they’re probably not someone you want to hang out with anyway. good luck
#suicide #suicide encouraging #ableist slurs so basically a friend called out one of those people for racism. one of them called my friend "st*pid" and my friend objected to this and mentioned they relate that word to bullying over their learning disability. that person deliberately called my friend st*pid over and over, claiming that they could "reclaim" the word and thus use it against my friend. then my friend became upset and posted about suicidal ideation.
same warnings as last ask- someone in the group saw my friend's post and said "who cares if that person kills themself" and a bunch of people in that group liked the post. my friend almost went to the hospital that night. when i confronted the op about making that post they turned it back on me and accused me of like, not sympathizing with their feeling "unsafe" and thus feeling okay with their saying that about a person they knew was suicidal. they admitted they knew my friend was suicidal toothey will call people they are arguing with ableist slurs and when the person objects, they say they're "reclaiming" the slur (by using it to put disabled people down). they have a really weird way of viewing anti-ableism that seems more concerned with what's convenient for them.
yikes, i’m sorry that happened to your friend. it kind of seems to me that the safest thing is to avoid these people altogether rather than trying to argue with them. sucks that they belong to such an insular community though
My, what impressive horns! by oldandsolo // CC license 2.0
hey i dont think any of my followers are brazilian but id appreciate it if you could reblog it if you have any brazilian followers
my mentally ill partner has been kicked out of his home and doesnt have a safe place to stay or any money, hes alone and scared and may be hallucinating and if anybody can give him a couch to crash on please let me know. he doesnt have a tumblr and my communication with him will be spotty but id love to give him some good news next time i talk to him.
ETA: i should note he’s in rio, sorry bout that, i am aware brazil is enormous
i don’t mean like, seeing someone and being like “is that person really there” tho that does happen quite a bit too, i mean knowing someone and having a relationship with them, but you have reason to believe that if you weren’t schizophrenic they wouldn’t exist to you and you don’t know whether that makes them unreal or not
you know “that feel” when you’re not sure whether someone is real or whether they only exist because you’re schizophrenic. i’m mostly at peace with this feeling but it’s weird to remember that most people never have to worry about it
@iangelinthemarble, when i od'd on some various stuff (but no codeine) during a near-miss suicide attempt, i also had scary psych symptoms i'd never had before or since (vivid auditory hallucinations, weird perceptual problems like everything was distorted, being convinced stuff happened that hadn't). at the time it was terrifying ofc, but in retrospect i attribute it all to stress. many NT people will have 1 or 2 panic attacks during the most stressful times in their life so i liken it to that.
#suicide
(1) TRIGGER WARNING: #suicide, #overdose, #suicide attempt (failed), Feel free not to answer this if you don't feel up to it/ don't want to/don't feel comfortable, I'm okay with you posting publicly so your followers can weigh in if you are. Um. So I attempted suicide last night (and failed by rather a large margin tbh) by overdosing on codeine. I took quite a lot, but I'm not sure exactly how much and I called the ambulance straight away because it wasn't the right time for me to die (cont.)
Cont. 2) and I didn't end up needing any medical attention, they just took blood and urine samples and sent me to eps then I went home, so it wasn't super serious physically. I was kind of foggy/sleepy/lightheaded but otherwise didn't feel any effects while I was in hospital (apart from being really itchy) and I got home around 7 hours after I took the pills. I ate a bit of food but threw up, then went to bed. I didn't really sleep just kind of dozed, but I started getting auditory stuff (con.t)(cont.3) which I've never had before. I don't know how much of what I was hearing was actually happening- I thought I could hear ppl moving around the house, someone turning a key in a lock for a really long time, doors opening, etc. which could've been happening, but I also heard bees which were definitely not really there. I freaked out the first time, because it got loud really quickly and it sounded like they were under my pillow, but I realised they weren't really there and after (con.t)(cont 4) a while the sound faded away, but kept fading in and out til I fell asleep. Sometimes it just sounded like one or two, sometimes like a whole swarm and it was kind of scary even though I knew it wasn't real, and the sound kept waking me up, and I kept freaking out that I was imagining the other sounds I could hear. Sorry, this is really long. Basically I was wondering if the codeine could've caused them, or if they just happened at the same time because I was feeling so bad? (con.t)(cont 5, last one I promise) and if they were caused by the codeine then are they likely to happen again or be a one off? Really sorry this is so long and messy :/ thank you for your time, you're really amazing. And it's okay if you can't answer- telling you about it has made me feel better already, thank you :) (all done :))
cursory googling suggests that hallucinations can be an uncommon reaction to codeine even at regular doses, so if you took a large amount of it it’s definitely possible that it caused auditory hallucinations! typically when hallucinations are caused by a reaction like this they’re a one-time thing but it might be an indication that you’re sensitive to the medication in question, so i might be cautious around high doses of codeine in the future. it’s also possible when you’re drifting in and out of sleep to have what are called hypnagogic hallucinations, which are considered a “normal” brain function, so that might have contributed? ofc, feeling shitty does increase your susceptibility to hallucinations, so it might’ve been that you had three factors at once combining to cause it. hopefully this helps a bit!
