José

Mxli 📷

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

Claro que te pienso.

[key-change]

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

Nadie habla de seguir adelante tambien con los errores.

Soy mis aciertos, soy mis triunfos, soy mis logros, pero tambien mis errores, mis fracasos, mis tropiezos.

No se puede regresar a ser el hombre que fui antes de equivocarme.

No puedo hacerte sentir de nuevo lo que sentias, porque no soy el hombre que era antes de errar.

Y no estoy seguro si quiero yo ser ese hombre de nuevo.

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

Se fue mi mejor amigo, mi héroe. El hombre que mas admiraba. Se fue mi padre.

Ha sido la semana mas difícil de mi vida. Una fecha que desearía jamás hubiera llegado. No me alcanzan las palabras para expresar el ejemplo de persona que era.

Y es que toda la semana he intentando encontrar la manera perfecta de honrar su vida, y simplemente no puedo hacerlo en pocas palabras.

Mi padre era una luz cálida. Una persona paciente, inteligente, llena de amor y risas.

Cada que era posible mi padre se detenía a ayudar a quien lo necesitara, y esta semana no he dejado de escuchar historias de tanta gente que lo respetaba y admiraba. A mi padre le gustaba creer en la gente, y transmitía esa energía de una forma tan sincera que te hacía creer en ti mismo. Tenía consejos para toda situación, pero nunca buscaba imponerte una idea, sino ayudarte a navegar y sentirte seguro con tus decisiones. Un líder.

Me siento orgulloso de llevar el nombre de un gran hombre, me siento orgulloso de ser tu hijo. Se que mi padre vivirá en todos los recuerdos que ha dejado en tanta, tanta gente. Pasaran años y nunca olvidaré la paz de tú presencia.

Gracias Apá.

[missanthropicprinciple]

Oh, you know, you realize that grief is perhaps the last and final translation of love. And I think, you know, this is the last act of loving someone. And you realize that it will never end. You get to do this to translate this last act of love for the rest of your life.  - Ocean Vuong

[princepestilence]

One of the more exasperating things about living a life on this planet has to be how doomed we are just to fall into the same pit one after another for infinite generations, even if you know the pit is coming up. It's a completely unavoidable event. Because you start out young and clever and there's all these well-meaning older people who will try to give you advice about the big picture things of being human

--and it's always some stupid trite bullshit. Despicable platitudes. If it was that easy, the world would be a different place, so you decide when you're old, you're going to say actual real meaningful things when you give advice and not just watery sop like this.

Then you get older and real experiences happen to you along the way, and you realise that's it. There isn't anything else to say. That's the absolute best advice we've got for saying the enormity of what you're feeling in these moments, stress-tested over a hundred thousand years of going through it. And it still sounds like sop, except you hear through that now to the truth inside.

And despite all this and how badly you want to warn them, no young people will ever be able to understand how genuinely and sincerely you mean it when you try to share this truth, and will only hear the platitudes and stupid trite bullshit. They won't really understand you, even if they want to believe you, because they can't. Not really. And you can't save them from going in the pit. They have to go in the pit. It's the only way.

You can even tell them that they will have to go in the pit before things begin to make a kind of sense, and sometimes they get a little mad at you because they already know everything and the pit sounds stupid. And it is. And they're still going to go in it. It will teach them and change them and then it will be their turn to be disbelieved by annoyed young people who they can't save from the future.

Sorry and good luck, I guess.

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

[nano-heart]

When Lemony Snicket wrote “I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you everyday. | will love you as we find ourselves farther and farther from one another, where once we were so close... I will love you until your face is fogged by distant memory. I will love you no matter where you go and who you see, I will love you if you don't marry me. I will love you if you marry someone else and I will love you if you never marry at all, and spend your years wishing you had married me after all. That is how I will love you even as the world goes on its wicked way.”

[borgialucrezia]

ANORA (2024) dir. by sean baker mikey madison as anora "ani" mikheeva

"I was excited about playing a character like this, because she’s very complicated. I always wanted an audience to recognize her pain underneath everything."

[duallpa]

Mikey Madison in Anora (2024) dir. Sean Baker

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

"Our sense of identity is formed by our emotional milestones. Every time we avoid emotion, we avoid developing our identity."

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

Dejando la sangre en el azulejo.

[flagged-as-naughty-deactivated2]

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

Hoy Quetai me dio un abrazo en mis sueños. Gracias Quetsi.

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

Tú.

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

Y es que como después de todo aún cabe duda?

[l-fakeplastictrees-l]

Cómo te hago ver qué es para siempre?

Cómo te hago entender que he planeado mi vida entera ante la diminuta posibilidad de vivir un futuro en el que estés presente.

Cómo te hago ver qué no he conocido a nadie que se compare con lo maravillosa que es tu existencia?

Cómo puedo probar que jamás he tenido una sonrisa tan sincera como cuando estabas tú?

No hay nadie más. No habrá nadie más.

Eres tú, por siempre. A la distancia, en el ocaso. Tu.

Y si necesitas verlo, llevo una foto nuestra a cualquier lugar que he llamado mi hogar.