LAIN

I water my plants even though I know they're dead

[lainiamawallflower]

Graphic Design

[derekq-art]

[antipahtico]

Derek Quinlan

[amberibarreche]

[lainiamawallflower]

This is me as a little girl. I grew up in a culture that values men over women. But I was lucky and I shouldn't have to say that. I shouldn't have to say I was lucky to survive a culture that tends to mens needs more than women’s. I shouldn't have to say I was lucky to grow up in a culture more mild-tempered toward women than many other cultures. I shouldn’t have to say I’m lucky that the women in my culture take care of the home and the kids and the meals and the clean up and didn’t get to choose who they loved, while the men went to work or the war. I shouldn’t have to say I’m lucky that the most antifeminism that happens in my family now is that the women take care of the men as if they were babies who couldn’t help themselves and that the men still ogle and speak of women and speak down to women as if they are solely their possession but not of any value other than that they are theirs. I shouldn’t have to say I’m lucky I don’t come from a culture that believes women are even less. I shouldn’t have to say I’m lucky I didn’t get raped by family members as I came into age of wedlock. I shouldn’t have to say I am lucky to have been born in the generation where my culture stopped arranging marriages. I shouldn’t have to say I’m lucky we moved to America. I shouldn't have to say I’m lucky, I shouldn’t have to say it because we shouldn’t still be favoring one gender over the other, we should never have in the first place. We were all this little girl once, with light in our eyes and hair as long as our dreams. Remember her the next time you think you can’t help another little girl. Remember her when you think feminism isn’t necessary. Remember her when you think we don’t need to unite as women and as men and women. Remember her when you treat your kids differently because of their genders. Remember her when you're too busy thinking about your petty fucking problems. Remember there are girls still being sold into slavery, girls still being forced to marry, girls getting raped like they are trash, girls still getting kicked out of their own homes when they have their periods, girls still being genitally mutilated, girls still being subservient, still being forced to do and to be and to wear what, who, and what, they do not want, still girls and women bowing down to man. Remember the little girl you were. Don't you ever fucking forget that could have been you, was you, or is you. Fight for each other. Fight for a better culture. I love my culture but I do not need to love the old ways. The change starts with me and you.

[lainiamawallflower]

The Process

The “process” is a mixed feat for everyone. Most of us want to get on with the process, our own personal processes, but that’s where we essentially live, that is how we live, the process is what we are, we become the outcomes and the stringed hairs of our processes. The process is daunting, can be daunting, but the process also screams hope. We have those embarrassing moments, you know, the ones where you think back later and cringe to yourself and make a funny noise to rid it from your brain, that’s a part of the process- we’re still learning, we’re still growing. Most people don’t have compassion or empathy toward you. You need to hang and stick to those people who do. Those people who recognize their own faults in yours. The ones who forgive you over and over because they know you’re making an effort, because they too are making their efforts. No one is a perfect human. Those who treat you like you’re not allowed to be flawed are the worst of them, because they’ll get to you and make you feel bad for not already being better already, not already being through your process. But, the truth is, they sure as hell aren’t through their own process, they barely even started. But, you, you will get better and that’s where the hope is.

[lainiamawallflower]

The start of an old idea. The first page. 

[lainiamawallflower]

It's important to have someone who takes photos of you All those moments were going to be missed And later on you'll wanna know about your life more than a selfie or a group photo can tell. You're going to want to see who you were from a distance. Your nuances. You're going to want to get to know yourself at every stage. Pictures tell you more about who you are than anything. It's ironic that I have no one. It's because I am the one. I see the beauty, the moments in another's every day life. Taking photos of someone doing their thing, if it's sitting on the couch with a headwrap on grating soap watching SVU or you know, whatever, it's a sign of love, admiration, respect. I don't know if I'll ever see that in someone for me and that is my heart break.

[lonniiii-deactivated20170829]

the best apology is changed behavior

[mi-ki-ki-m]

[missmentelle]

At age 23, Tina Fey was working at a YMCA. At age 23, Oprah was fired from her first reporting job.  At age 24, Stephen King was working as a janitor and living in a trailer. 

At age 27, Vincent Van Gogh failed as a missionary and decided to go to art school.   At age 28, J.K. Rowling was a suicidal single parent living on welfare.

At age 28, Wayne Coyne ( from The Flaming Lips) was a fry cook. At age 30, Harrison Ford was a carpenter.  At age 30, Martha Stewart was a stockbroker.  At age 37, Ang Lee was a stay-at-home-dad working odd jobs. Julia Child released her first cookbook at age 39, and got her own cooking show at age 51. Vera Wang failed to make the Olympic figure skating team, didn’t get the Editor-in-Chief position at Vogue, and designed her first dress at age 40. Stan Lee didn’t release his first big comic book until he was 40. Alan Rickman gave up his graphic design career to pursue acting at age 42. Samuel L. Jackson didn’t get his first movie role until he was 46.

Morgan Freeman landed his first movie role at age 52. Kathryn Bigelow only reached international success when she made The Hurt Locker at age 57. Grandma Moses didn’t begin her painting career until age 76. Louise Bourgeois didn’t become a famous artist until she was 78. Whatever your dream is, it is not too late to achieve it. You aren’t a failure because you haven’t found fame and fortune by the age of 21. Hell, it’s okay if you don’t even know what your dream is yet. Even if you’re flipping burgers, waiting tables or answering phones today, you never know where you’ll end up tomorrow. Never tell yourself you’re too old to make it. 

Never tell yourself you missed your chance. 

Never tell yourself that you aren’t good enough. 

You can do it. Whatever it is. 

[lainiamawallflower]

I could stare at you all day, working you over until I convince myself I shouldn't be

I stare at your face. When I recall it later I see love in place of your high, hollowed cheekbones When you smile You sparkle Lit up like a small town on Christmas Day Lit up like my body on fire

The match has hit the ground Not a second to waste I am nothing but melting sparks now So happy to feel warmth in the midst of this inner winter

And every time Your bones raise high A ventriloquist pulls your skin taut Meat against meat They skim the outermost folds of your Squinting eyes Lines like ladders fallen sideways Curves like parentheses lying on their backs Cupping the shape of your eyes Making sure to keep them there Making sure they don't fall out of your head

Super Mario Brothers obstacle courses Jump up, turn right, jump up, turn left, run forward, jump up, don’t hit the line above with the top of your head or your size will shrink small And you will never get to The sepia toned mountain of light Just within reach Your prize for the work you’ve done Your weapon for level four

Honey, miele, miel All the ways to say How shiny Your iris’ can get A burning sunset Like you’re really alive Over and over again You are really alive Standing under the shadow of your pyramid I stare in awe

You catch my top lip with your bottom one Just as my jaw drops

[laughingsquid]

Song Wig, A Unique Hairpiece With Earbud Strands That Allow the Wearer to Share Their Music

[helainetieu]

Allow people to be wrong about you and do right by yourself.

[stability]

[lainiamawallflower]

😈

[lainiamawallflower]

It's Monday. It's #iwokeuplikethis. "I am learning to come out of my shell and be more confident and just okay with myself. I wouldn't say it's low self-esteem but I've always lacked confidence even at things I'm good at and know I'm good at. I'm hoping by being a part of this it will help me learn to love myself more for me. Just being me." Hell ya, @outlaw6453. Thanks for being a part of this. #IWULT #IWULTohio #supportyoursisters

[lainiamawallflower]

@instadubbs #joker

[popptart]