Le Random Blog

Basically, anything could end in here

[studentlifeproblems]

If you are a student Follow @studentlifeproblems​

[laud-af-blog]

Yeah...let's just imagine I have material to study from as I of course work hard in every class

[studentlifeproblems]

Why do homework when you can just watch Netflix and hope the 15 minutes before class are enough to do it?

Omg yes! I would totally do the same thing, and binge watch all my favourite shows and movies, and then complete my assignment the night before it’s due! 

[laud-af-blog]

Someone explain something to me...

In the US you guys are expected to maintain an A avarage or something...but that in my grading system is getting at least 90/100 and that shit is fucking impossible.

I mean, there are some exams with like just 2 questions so if you have one or just part of one wrong you already have like what for the US is a C or D.

Like, the other day I forgot to write a pas in a French exam and it dropped my grade to 94. Which means that if I had had two mistakes I would already be at a B.

So...

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU GUYS SURVIVE?!

[studentlifeproblems]

If you are a student Follow @studentlifeproblems​

[laud-af-blog]

See, the thing here is that in my high school we even have written our names on the chairs, because our chair is our chair and no one else's

[studentlifeproblems]

Graduation day be like

[studentlifeproblems]

If you are a student Follow @studentlifeproblems​

[sarahseeandersen]

[laud-af-blog]

Can relate

[laud-af-blog]

I said “Benedict Cumberbatch” in my friend group’s chat

And now two of them are text fighting because one of them says it’s “Cucumbach” and the other says it’s “Cucumber”.

[laud-af-blog]

UPDATE

They are now somehow texting about destroying the universe, creating a new one, escaping time loops, and closets

[laud-af-blog]

I said "Benedict Cumberbatch" in my friend group's chat

And now two of them are text fighting because one of them says it's "Cucumbach" and the other says it's "Cucumber".

[trashynico]

I showed my friend smut for ths first time; here is what she said.

“Aw this is cute, but knowing that you are the literal spawn of satan, I am afraid”

“wish I could get someone undressed that fast holy shit”

“WHERE IS THE CONSENT IN THIS?”

“DICKS OUT. SO FAST. NO WARNING. JESUS HELP.”

“Does that size of dick even exist?”

“ Throbbing. haha… Thats a fun word to say.”

“HONEY PUT SOME LUBE ON FIRST, HONEY NO”

“you ain’t gonna be sitting tomorrow”

“Why are you making me read this again? I’m not complaining…just….curious”

“with the way they described that, I don’t think i could ever drink milkshakes again”

“This has left me aroused and confused”

“Well that was wild”

[laud-af-blog]

I'M DYING😂😂😂

[kierancfthehunt]

A reminder: a complex character is, by definition, problematic to some extent.

Just, you know, so you keep it in mind for future reference.

[laud-af-blog]

WHY AM I LAUGHING SO HARD AT THIS

[studentlifeproblems]

I have like 4 proyects and 2 books due mid-January. What have I done? YouTube, Buzzfeed, read 3 books that aren't for school, watch all Mindhunter, play 2 Zelda games, and finish 2 seasons of Supernatural

[studentlifeproblems]

If you are a student Follow @studentlifeproblems​

[laud-af-blog]

Try having a full open-question math exam

[laud-af-blog]

Okay so I found this

And want to say something.

How about this: I know my mother loves me but I'm totally not the daughter she asked for. She always judges my personality, and the things I like she hates them. She doesn't even like my "friends". She basically asks what the hell did she do to deserve this kind of daughter. Oh, and she hits me. My father left my mother for another woman not long after my 2nd birthday and has even forgotten to pick me up at school after a music presentation when it's already dark.

Now, let's talk about my so called "friends". I don't have a best friend. I used to have one, until 1st grade. I'm in 9th grade. So. We are 8 in my squad. But one person (my ex best friend's best friend) is like 5% of her time with us. And another person talks shit about her (my xbff's bff) and me (she almost got me expelled last year)(and she claims to be my almost Parabatai (consult Shadowhunters fandom for that)) in and endless fight for my xbff's friendship. Actually, two of us in the group know my xbff from the first day she arrived at school (we were 4)(the rest met her way after that, and got close just because of the two of us) and now both of us are the people she is most distant from. Not because of us, she pushed us away. So I naturally drifted to that other girl who my xbff pushed away. But I can't spend time with her because my mother hates her family. Hell, I can only go to the houses of 2 people out of 8 in my squad.

I've never had a boyfriend. And actually no one has even liked me yet. Men in my grade just don't talk to me. Except my first crush and some other dude (and if you're thinking about something there: they both are in very happy relationships).

I'm actually in psychology in school and turn out that I found out they are trying to rewire my brain to be happier.

Conclusion: I'm freaking getting depression.

OH another thing. Half my life my mother compared me to my xbff "why can't you be like her?".

Jokes on her.

Now she hates my xbff.

Which leads us to this: I'm bi but only 3 people know because my mother is a freaking homophobic and has actually told me to my face that she wouldn't talk to me were I something other than straight.

Literally half of my grade hates me and no one understands me. At all. Just one person does. Bust guess what? She lives in another country and I have just been able to talk to her on WhatsApp.

But let's make one think clear: I have no problem with school. My grades are high (best English term exam present (only 2 mistakes)(I live in South America)) and though some teachers may not be fond of me, they don't give me a "hard time". Oh but the people. That is another thing. I'm always left alone when we have to do group works. And none of my "friends" are in my class. But when we do get de possibility in some class to be with people from other classes, they just don't do it. And yet again I am left alone.

Oh and my father gains a lot but gives almost nothing to my mother. And my mother gets payed a basic at the moment (before, she earned way more) while trying to pay the best school in the country (yes, my school is the best in the country taking into account all education areas and other parts).

So pretty fucked up.

Actually not being here anymore would help my mother with the economic load. Because it is bad.

Oh and guess what: only time my family speaks is when my mother is crying herself out on the phone because she is tired of having to live with me (she says that), and on xmas and some birthdays. But not even all the family speaks then. They rant about/to each other daily. What a family, right?

Would people cry for me? Sure. Would they let themselves drift off? No. Would they truly miss me? Maybe some, but many would be pleased they don't have to stand my voice anymore and tell me to shut the fuck up. They would be please no one shouts the answer in class when the teacher asks for it when they don't even understand. They would be pleased they won't have any more intelectual fights between me and the other smarts kids in the class (those are fun for us smart kids, but turns out everyone hates them, they said so).

So, that shitty post changes nothing. Because take this: My parents aren't all that loving. I don't have real friends. No boy (or even girl) has ever liked me.

So you don't know the fucking situation. Hell, I wish I had the life that person describes in that blog. But no. My life is very different from that.

So no, it doesn't help. Cause they are indeed good things. But not even half as good as what that post described.

[1111heyyo1111-deactivated202403]

Am I the only person who has books to read but buys new ones anyway??

[laud-af-blog]

It is impossible not to do that

[dearest-comma-angelica]

a bunch of rambling thoughts about satisfied

it starts with angelica surrounded by people, seemingly satisfied and content, and ends with her all by herself on stage, privately devastated and unsatisfied

it’s framed like an essay. intro & thesis, three body paragraphs, conclusion and restatement of the thesis, showing her intelligence

while analyzing alexander, even in a lovestruck daze, angelica notes that he’s penniless. this comes up again in reason one, yet is once again dismissed. his financial state doesn’t matter—eliza does.

in the sia cover, the aforementioned singer sings both “and i knooow” and “helpless”, signifying that once angelica realizes eliza’s feelings, she is helpless to do anything but acknowledge them

helpless is repeated by eliza, three times, one for each reason.

angelica notes both alexander and eliza’s eyes, but never her own, symbolically linking them 

angelica also mentions “the first time i saw her face / then i turn and see my sister’s face” once again connecting the two people she loves more than anything

“intelligent eyes” she notices his mind first, a link to schuyler sisters, “i’m looking for a mind at work”

angelica says “mind” rather than heart during “i know my sister like i know my own mind”, showing that this is both a rational and emotional decision; she is using her head and her heart to manage this sacrifice

angelica only says “heart” once in the whole song, with ‘set my heart aflame’

in the first verse: “i remember that night/i remember those/i remember that dreamlike” angelica uses remember three times, and never forget for alexander, drawing attention to the line that “i have never been the same”—alexander is breaking the pattern of angelica’s world

the fire symbolism throughout the song, in comparison to helpless which uses “drowning”. angelica “match” wits, aflame, etc. there is also electricity (ben franklin with the key and the kite), another flame-filled metaphor. 

angelica also links alexander to icarus in BURN, in this case, angelica is icarus (clothed in orange), destined to fall, and alexander is the sun. eliza (clothed in blue) is the sea, this metaphor established by helpless and then by satisfied

angelica’s reiteration of the wedding toast is a reminder that this is all replaying with her mind; much like “i realize three fundamental truths at the exact same time”, this is all happening within a matter of seconds, showing how fast her brain truly works

“he’d be mine” / “that boy is mine”

angelica reflects on his eyes right before the reintroduced wedding toast, reiterating the feature she once again first noticed about him

satisfied is in many ways a revelation on a scene we thought we previously understood. this is another callback to schuyler sisters with angelica “you want a revolution? i want a revelation!” and the other wedding-goers go “union / to the revolution” what happens next? a revelation 

“i just might regret that night for the rest of my days / i’ll never forget the first time i saw your face” regret and forget are the first half of this rhyming scheme, connecting the two. if angelica could forget her feelings for hamilton, she would not have to regret this night.

“i’m sure you don’t know what you mean” “you’re like me: i’m never satisfied” / “nice going angelica, he was right: you will never be satisfied” angelica now painfully, acutely, understands what he was saying

at least my dear eliza’s his wife / at least i keep his eyes in my life—rhyming scheme, in addition to showing that, even when it comes to consoling herself about losing alexander, eliza still comes first

he will never be satisfied. i will never be satsified. is one of the only times in the song alexander and angelica are directly compared the same way that eliza & alexander are on numerous connections. a callback to “you’re like me: i’m never satisfied”