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“Do you feel…better now?”

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part two of “We can still share the bed.” part three; coming soon<3

pairing: nomad!steve x ex-widow!Reader (best friend's girlfriend, girlfriend's best friend) {happy pride, reader is bisexual and had a homoerotic situationship with her best friend}

warnings: MDNI || DURING THE BLIP. more angsty than our other writings for sure. drug & alcohol mention briefly. (mentions of reader using in the past). You both have depression lmao. SIZE DIFFERENCE (reader is mentioned to be small and also if you squint she's malnourished lmao) reader is very experienced and (tw) calls herself whore/slut occasionally. she's also lowkey a slob, sorry. they have a black cat! (RIP Alpine) suicidal thoughts mentioned? || NOMAD STEVE!! Premature ejaculation! PinV, multiple orgasms. Shame?? Angst angst angst. mentions of red room trauma. lots of sad. Bucky mention. idk if i missed anything i'm sorry.

word count: 13.3k

summary: Your best friend and your boyfriend were blipped. Once the money in your best friend's account ran out and you couldn't afford your shared apartment anymore- you went to her boyfriend for help. Who, coincidentally, is your boyfriend's best friend. The weight of guilt hangs heavy over your heads- but after going so long without any sexual encounters- you both break down and decide to help each other out.

a/n: Trying a new kind of posting format and breaking up longer works into parts. For this one I (Verdandi-mun🌻💜) wrote Steve!! Reader character was written by Flora-mun🌸🧡 and is based off of her OC Caroline Loveland. Lots of angst and depression, sorry!!

“I didn’t have sex for the first time until I was 93.” Steve joked. That was how he felt best to deal with it. His cheeks were so flushed, heat radiating off of them. He hoped you wouldn’t notice. He did stop to think about it, though. For him, it had been about five years. He kept telling himself it was fine. He’d gone longer without before, but…maybe he missed it too. He just didn’t want to admit it.

"Isn't that a movie? 'The 93 Year Old Virgin?'" You joked back. You noticed his face was flushed in the pale moonlight, but you didn't say anything. Yours was the same.

“Uhm…I can help with some of that.” He answered softly. Not all of it. Definitely not.

"What part can you help me with, Steve...?" You asked, shifting ever so slightly towards him. Your hand was still resting on his shoulder. You moved it a little bit, sliding closer to where his shoulder met his neck. That's what he was suggesting, right? Hopefully, you weren't just being a whore and making him uncomfortable.

“Oh…oh boy.” He muttered under his breath. Steve moved his hands to your waist, holding you firmly as he held you slightly away from him. “N-not that…” His voice didn’t seem so confident, though- there was a bit of a waver as he spoke. You were so small, just like his girl had been. His flush only grew deeper.

He took one hand and grabbed yours, instead moving it to be firmly planted on his chest. He kept his hand on top of yours. The touch was really nice; he couldn’t deny that.

“We can still share the bed.”

Leaving you while you were so vulnerable would not be polite, even if you were coming onto him. He really wasn’t sure how to feel about that. You were his girlfriend’s best friend and his best friend’s girlfriend.

But this was a weird time, and everyone had been so alone...

You would've never acted like this with Steve under normal circumstances. Well, not alone. You would've absolutely tried to get all 4 of you to sleep together, and even just the three of you before you got with Bucky, but not...this. Not just Steve. He was hot, yeah, but you weren't a cheater or a homewrecker. Well. Not with your best friend and the love of her life, anyway.

"Oh, not that...?" You repeated softly, raising a brow at him. His words were saying one thing, but his actions were saying another. He was touching you now, his large hand resting on your small waist, yours on his chest. Damn. He was ripped; you could feel how firm his chest was even over his shirt. You could also feel how quickly his heart was beating. Yours was probably the same.

“Not…that.” He repeated quietly, keeping his eyes on yours. “I…”

"Okay. Not that." You went to lift your hand from his chest, but you noticed his grip had only gotten tighter on it. You just shifted away a little bit. Despite being crazy, you were typically nice. At least to the people you cared about. And being nice included not sexually manipulating your best friend's boyfriend. It was okay if you two just platonically touched and lay in bed together. It was still helpful, just not with the pent-up sexual frustration...

"Do you...want me to stop?" You shifted even closer to him, keeping your voice low. You didn't want to make him uncomfortable, and if he really wanted you to, you would stop. You just weren't so sure he really wanted you to... "You can leave, if you want."

He wasn’t sure what to do in this situation. You were clearly in distress. “I don’t want to…to cheat…on her.” His voice was low and quiet. The hand that held yours to his chest tightened its grip a bit. That made him think for a moment, though, about what you'd been talking about earlier.

"No, I know. I get that...Things are just. So weird and different now." You nodded. Of course, he wouldn't want to cheat on her. It's not like you wanted to cheat on Bucky either...You were just feeling so...desperate. And he was right there, and he was hot, and it was convenient. And is it cheating if they're dead or missing or vanished into thin air?

“Uhm…did you two ever…A-after I asked her out…?” Steve looked incredibly nervous. It’d been so long since he’d been touched, even just like this, that it was hard for him to not get excited about it- no matter how much he didn’t want to.

"Um...yeah. We did, sometimes." You admitted, watching his reactions. He looked almost flustered. It was kinda cute.

His heartbeat sped up as he thought about the two of you girls…uhm. The flush on his cheeks grew deeper, heat radiating off them now.

You could literally feel how hot Steve's cheeks were, his flush radiating from his skin. No wonder your friend had folded for him so easily; he was adorable.

His girl was much more sexual than Steve could ever even imagine being- so he wasn’t that surprised…but he still…was. The girls had talked like they were intimate a lot, but he didn’t think you'd actually meant it. All the times you'd asked him to have a threesome…were you being serious?

He gulped, making his Adam's apple bob visibly in his throat.

"Steve, honestly," You began, shifting a little closer to him once again. It seemed the idea was maybe growing on him. "I don't think she would be pissed if she found out we...slept together... after years of being celibate, if that's what you're asking." Your face was flushed and hot as you said it. It was kinda weird to be talking about having sex with Steve of all people.

He watched you move closer to him again, and he was still feeling shy as ever. You weren’t a bad-looking girl. In fact, he thought you were quite pretty. He didn’t want to tell you that, though; it would go right to your head...

“Is it…?” He started softly, obviously nervous to speak now. “Cheating…if it’s with you?” He couldn’t possibly be more flustered. “I mean…no offense, I don’t like you like that…” Casual sex was never even on his radar until he’d met the two of you. The way you two talked about one-night stands used to scare him.

You let out a little laugh. "It's okay. I don't like you like that either. It's just...convenient." You could tell he was really nervous, and you just wanted to reassure him. "But...like I said. We don't have to...do anything. Only if you want to."

“Convenient.” He repeated, his eyes meeting yours. “Right…”

"Yeah, convenient." You said again, nodding as you spoke. "And...we're both like...not ugly." You laughed just a little, waiting to see his reaction. You were both hot, really, and you were sure Steve knew that. Well, actually, you weren't sure. But with the way he was reacting...he certainly didn't think you were ugly. "Steve..." You came even closer, to the point where your bodies were touching now.

Shit. What had he agreed to? He was positive you already could feel how excited he was when you got so close to him.

Oh.

He was...already excited. That makes things easier, you suppose. "Are you...sure?" You whispered into his ear.

Feeling your breath hit his ear as you whispered to him made him twitch a little. Geez.

You pulled your hand away from his, running up the front of his shirt to feel him that way instead. God damn! He really was muscular. You kept your hand low, running your fingers across his muscular stomach. Shit. You were getting turned on already, too. You really were desperate.

“Y-yes. I’m sure.” He didn’t sound so sure, but he definitely looked sure. “I’ll stop you if I change my mind.” He assured you, already basically admitting he was going to let you take charge of him. It took him a while to become dominant with his girlfriend; he definitely wasn’t going to be that way with you. His heart fluttered at your soft touches on his torso. Your hands were so small and delicate.

...If he closed his eyes, it almost felt like you were her... Was that wrong? Probably. It flustered him just a little more.

You shivered when you felt him against your body. God. This was going to be good for you two, you thought. Well. At least, for you. Hopefully for Steve too. "Relax, Steve..." You moved your mouth to begin kissing on his jaw, just lightly. You would listen to him if he asked you to stop, but until then...

He laughed a little nervously. “You should know by now that ‘relaxing’ isn’t in my wheelhouse.” Steve rolled onto his back slowly, placing his hand on top of yours again but not holding it in place this time. He closed his eyes, taking a few deep, heavy breaths as he did.

"Oh, trust. I know." You giggled a little into his skin, moving your lips down a little bit to begin kissing on his neck. You weren't really sure what Steve was into - your friend had told you some stuff, but you didn't really remember - so you were kinda going in blind here.

That was fine; you were glad he was being mostly submissive at least. You performed better this way. You shivered a little when you felt his hand rest on yours, big and calloused. Your heart ached for just a moment - it reminded you of Bucky's hand. You tried to shove the thought out of your mind for now, to focus just on the task at hand. As he shifted onto his back, you didn't waste any time slowly climbing on top of him. In this position, the neckline of your tanktop was hanging low and showing your cleavage as you pressed your lips to his neck, kissing and licking just slightly. Your tanktop exposed your hard nipples through the thin fabric, pressed up against Steve's body. You wondered if he would notice...Keeping your hand on his torso, you slowly trailed your fingers up his abdomen, tracing the outline of each defined ab muscle.

His cheeks flushed red seeing down your shirt. It was inappropriate, but so was everything you two were about to do. He swallowed hard again, turning his head to the side and closing his eyes. As he did, he moved both hands to rest on your hips as you climbed on top. Geez. Even with all the weight you'd lost, you were still curvier than his girl was. He should really stop comparing the two of you...That wouldn’t end well.

"It'll feel good. Don't worry..." You continued to press soft kisses to his jawline, the stubble rubbing against your face a bit. You hoped you weren't being too romantic; you just wanted to tease him and make him feel good a little. You loved being a giver...

It was really almost embarrassing how quickly you were getting him worked up. He could already feel himself leaking at the tip beneath his pajama pants. Shit. It was impossible not to notice how worked up he was; it brought a smirk to your lips. Steve was already twitching and hard and breathing heavy...it only made you more confident.

The thoughts running through his head were maddening. Just get it over with. But he didn’t want to rush you; you needed it more than him. He wasn’t sure how to feel about you teasing him, though. Maybe you weren’t trying to. Maybe he should just calm down and enjoy it while he can.

“..sw-sweetheart…” He groaned out with a shuddering breath, his hands tightening their grip as he dug his fingers into your skin. He didn’t want to use your name for this. Seeing how his body was reacting, he almost felt betrayed. He was somehow more nervous than the first time he’d even had sex. Every time you moved around his body, he squirmed a little more beneath your weight.

"Hmmm....?" You hummed into his neck, gently kissing down to the crook of his neck. You sucked there - just gently; you didn't want to freak him out again - as you felt yourself growing wetter down there already. Damn. This felt...nice. Feeling a warm, human body against yours, one that was squirming and shivering under your touch no less. You were already too far gone; if Steve asked you to stop, well...

You moved your hand further up his shirt, your small hand finding his pectoral muscle and giving it a squeeze. Holy. Shit. This guy...was fucking beefy. Omg. You were even more mad now that you guys had never had a foursome before. His body reminded you of Bucky's but...Steve was somehow even more muscular.

You moved your hand out from under his shirt, instead pulling at the hem of it as you looked at his face. He might've been the most flushed you'd ever seen him. "Can you...take this off...for me?" You asked, tugging on his shirt. You didn't want to entirely dom him, but you thought you could command him a little, at least.

Steve looked back towards you, his face still fully flushed. The soft touch from your hand made his stomach flutter. “Y-yea…” His voice wavered a bit, his breathing still heavy as his chest heaved. He pushed himself up a bit, using just his core to hold his position as he slid his shirt off with shaky hands. Jeez. He still couldn’t believe he was really doing this right now. It’d been so long since he’d had really any kind of touch; it was just making him more shy and self-conscious. He tossed his shirt to the floor and laid back down beneath you.

He still couldn’t really bring himself to look at you too much right now, though. It was…embarrassing? Shameful? Both.

"Steve." You said, looking at his eyes as you watched him pull his shirt off. He was so...nervous, so tense, so shaky. It was almost making you feel guilty. "Relax..." You said again, moving your hands to slowly trail up and down his now exposed torso. Damn. Even in the dim moonlight, you could still see every defined muscle on his body. It was almost strange to see a man with two flesh arms, but you tried again to push thoughts of Bucky away.

“I am relaxed…” He protested. Poorly. He moved his attention back towards you, looking to your eyes. Would that help? He didn’t think so now that he was doing it. But he decided to stop trying to hide from you. Your head dipped back down to his chest, and he moved his hands back to your hips.

You couldn't help but let out a little chuckle. If Steve was relaxed, you were the fucking President. Whatever, hopefully he'd relax after he started feeling good.

You just needed to focus on making both of you feel good in the moment; you could focus on being guilty later. "Don't think about it too hard." You told him the same thing you were telling yourself. "I'll make you feel good..." You moved your lips down to kiss his neck again, kissing down to his now exposed collarbone. You nibbled on it gently, and then slowly trailed one hand down to fiddle with the waistband of his pajama pants. You were getting...antsy. It had been two years; you weren't really sure how slow you could take it.

“C-careful…sweetheart.” He muttered out. Every time your lips touched his skin, he felt like his heart might burst. Whether that was because of excitement or because of guilt…he couldn’t figure out. Not yet. He bit his lip as you began to fidget with his waistband. “D-Do you…need me to do that…for you too, doll?” He laughed a little. Partly because he was teasing, but also partly because this was ridiculous.

"Hmm?" You hummed into his chest, nipping at his collarbone. It felt...really nice, actually, to touch someone like this. You were definitely...more than excited at this point. You nearly wondered if you'd soaked through your skimpy little booty shorts yet. "You can try," You teased, pulling the band of his pants down to expose him. You looked down as you did, watching him pop out - hard and twitching and already wet at the tip. "Oh my...shit," You said. Fuck, did you say that out loud? Your surprise at his size was meant to be an inside thought. Jesus. Your eyes snapped back up to meet his, your face a little flushed with embarrassment.

“Jesus Christ, Sweetheart.” He rolled his eyes. That wouldn’t hide how flushed his cheeks were, though. He was downright flustered. It was a bit of an ego boost, though, hearing you exclaim about him like that. Thinking about it made him twitch a little. God. He really was touch-starved, more than he ever thought he was. And you hadn’t even touched him there yet. He let his eyes rest on you again, watching your movements, your reactions. It was dark enough for him to pretend you weren’t…who you were. Maybe he should listen to you and actually relax.

Your face was flushed when he spoke. Back in the day, Steve never spoke like that, but things were different now, you supposed. It was still a little weird to hear coming from him, though.

"Hey, language, Steve," You teased, fingers trailing down his stomach slowly. Steve sighed. “You need to stop hanging out with Stark.” He muttered, closing his eyes.

"But he's so hot," You teased, but you were quickly cut off when you let out a shaky gasp, following Steve's little moan you heard him make. You hadn't heard someone moan for you in far too long. It was getting you even more riled up.

As fun as going slow and teasing him was, you were going to need some relief soon, and by the looks of his, well....he would too. You moved your hand to gently wrap around him, and you let out a small gasp as you finally touched him. Your hand couldn't actually wrap fully around him - he was girthy. Buck had been the same way. From what you could tell, they were similar in size, Steve just a bit bigger. Not that you should be comparing their dick sizes anyway... He was twitching in your hand, and you stroked him, just gently, lightly, gauging his reaction as you stared at him in the dark moonlit room.

Feeling your small warm hand against him caused him to let out a soft groan. Geez. This wasn’t going to go well; he was going to cum way too quickly. He moved his arm, resting his wrist on his forehead as he turned his head away from you again. Your touch still caused him to squirm- his breaths heavy, causing him to shudder with every exhale. If he didn’t think about it too hard, you really did feel the same way against him as his girl did. Damn. His spine arched just a little bit, causing him to thrust himself against your hand as you held onto him.

You moved your hand on him slowly, dragging the wetness from his tip down to his shaft as you slowly stroked him. Fuck. You might not last long. You hadn't gone this long without getting off since...well, ever. "See? It feels good..." You murmured as you watched him thrust himself against your hand. It caused you to let out a quiet little moan, watching him seem so desperate for your touch. Fucking hell.

He hadn’t doubted it would feel nice. He just had been worried about how it would make him feel…like, on the inside. “Y-yea…” He stuttered out, his hips jerking into your hand still. Christ. “Yea…it feels good.” He admitted sheepishly. You truly hadn’t done anything yet. He flustered himself thinking about it. His hand moved to your thigh, gripping tightly into your flesh as your hand kept playing with him. “Sweetheart…” He moaned out, moving his focus back to you. His face was flushed and his eyes half lidded. He thought that you might be the death of him.

“Mhm, I know…” Your voice was high and teasing, your face flushed as he admitted that it felt good. Damn. You nearly forgot how much you loved pleasing others. You smirked when you felt the way his nails were digging into your thigh, and the way he was staring at you with that lust in his eyes. Fuck. As much as you loved pleasing, you were going to need some relief soon.

Your grip on him tightened when he moaned out for you; the way he called you those old-timey nicknames was really sexy... You'd always enjoyed it when Bucky did it too. You shifted, pulling your shorts to the side as you moved to line yourself up with him. You were already fucking sopping. You lowered yourself, just the slightest, to rub yourself against him.

“Oh, fuck,” you immediately gasped out as you made contact. You could’ve already came just from that, and he wasn’t even inside of you yet. Good god.

Steve wasn’t feeling so shy anymore, now focusing on the pleasure you gave him instead. It had been a really long time; he thought he might burst. You seemed to enjoy drawing it out and teasing him however you could. A minute ago he wanted to get it over with because he didn’t like the idea too much; now he wanted to get it over with because if he didn’t he might die. A little bit of an exaggeration, but…it had been almost six years since the last time he had sex. He was allowed to be a little dramatic.

He shifted beneath you, getting up on his elbows for a moment before sitting up against the headboard of his bed. As he did, he grabbed your hips- almost a little too aggressively- as he pulled you down onto him all the way. Steve pushed his head into the nape of your neck, groaning out into your shoulder as he hid his face from you again. He hadn’t stopped too long to think about if it would hurt or not…surely not. You were so wet, so so wet. It made Steve shudder as he slid you onto him. “F…fuck.” He groaned out against your skin. “Fuck, sweetheart…” He shuddered as he pulled back just a little to look at your face again.

You were not expecting Steve to act so bold, to suddenly pull you down onto himself. You were not complaining by any means, though. You let out a loud, high-pitched moan as he slid inside. He slid in so easily - you were so wet from being so pent up - and he stretched you out a little as he went in- the sting absolutely delicious. It had been so long since you'd had something this big inside of her...your body wasn't used to it anymore.

"F-fuck," You murmured, sucking in a breath as you arched your spine towards him. Jesus fucking Christ. He felt good. "Oh...were you feeling that desperate, Steve? Couldn't wait any longer?" You teased, but her façade was crumbling a little, your face flushed and breath heavy as you spoke.

“S-sorry…are you okay…?” It almost looked like he was drunk, even though he couldn’t be anymore with the serum. He didn’t even know what had come over him; he was just a little embarrassed by how rashly he had just acted.

"Yeah, I'm fine. You can be even rougher, if you want," You said it mostly as a joke, not that you would mind, but because you couldn't really picture Cap being rough with you at all.

If his cheeks could flush more, they would. Rough? Cripes. He knew you were like that, but…hearing it from your mouth was crazy. He certainly wasn’t one to be rough normally. He already kind of had been, though. Steve closed his eyes as he buried his face back into your neck. He almost…wanted to kiss you. Not like…you you…but still. His right hand slid from your hip up onto your breast, groping gently. He let his fingers run over your nipple, gently pinching at it. "Fuck, baby," You moaned out as he pinched at your nipple. Damn. He hadn't even moved yet, and you were already feeling so good.

“Don’t call me that.” He mumbled against your skin, protesting poorly. As he complained, he pinched at you a little harder, his fingers rubbing against you and then moving to pull at the puffy skin of your nipple. Not too hard, just hard enough. You rolled your eyes at his weak little protest. He was being a little bit of a hypocrite, you thought. "You...can call me 'sweetheart'... but I can't call you baby...?" Your words were breathy and whiny as you spoke, your back still arching as he played with your breasts. Fuck. You hadn't felt anything like this in so long...you missed it more than she even thought you did.

“You can call me sweetheart, if you want. If you call me baby…it’ll confuse me.” His voice was soft and shy, just a murmur in the thick air. As he spoke, he lifted his head back up to look to your eyes. “You sound like her when you talk like that.” His voice wavered as he mumbled his words.

You chuckled at his request. You couldn't call him 'baby,' but you could call him 'sweetheart'? This man was so weird. As he explained it, though...you understood. You and your best friend were similar in that way; you two said the same sort of things when you were fucking, probably picking it up from each other during all the times you two slept together.

"Alright, sweetheart," You said, putting a little emphasis on the word. "I won't call you that. Sorry." Apologising at all was something you didn't like doing - especially during sex - so you just left it at that.

As his hand traveled your torso, he noticed that he could feel your ribs now. Maybe he’d scold you about it later. He tried to distract himself, though, instead answering the question you'd asked before.

"Y-you made me feel desperate, sweetheart." He admitted through clenched teeth, his eyes flicking up to meet yours- his big baby blues just barely hidden behind his lashes.

"Oh, is that right...?" You teased, giggling a little. You were a little flustered, though, surprised that he had actually admitted to being desperate for you. If you could've, you might've even gotten even wetter. "I...was feeling desperate, too," You admitted, though that was probably already clear considering that you two were even fucking in the first place. As he buried his face into your neck, you moved your hand to tangle into his hair, gently gripping his dirty blonde locks, which had gotten quite long recently. It was...sexy. Almost as long as Bucky's had been...

You tightened around him involuntarily, the way he felt inside of you feeling so good and so full. Fuck. At this rate, you were definitely not going to last long. Good thing you could go for a few rounds; in case you came before he did, you'd let him keep going.

His arm wrapped around your waist tightly, firmly holding you in place on his lap. He needed relief. He needed this. As much as he wanted to protest, he couldn’t. Using his forearm against the small of your back, he began to move you up and down slowly against him, shuddering and groaning out as he did. He felt like he wanted to sink his teeth into your neck, but that was a bit much for him. So he didn’t.

"F-fuck..." You breathed, feeling him grip at your sides and begin to move you up and down on him. The sensation was beyond pleasurable; you couldn't believe how sensitive you were after 2 years of going untouched. The sounds he was making too...God. It was just getting you going even more. You kept your hand gently tangled in his hair as you moved your hips against his, matching his slow rhythm. You were getting the overwhelming urge to kiss him - hot and sloppy and open-mouthed like you always liked to do during sex - but you thought he might not like that.

“Fuck-“ He stopped himself before he finished calling out your name. You felt yourself clench around him when he almost spoke your name. You'd always gotten such a rush from hearing your name during sex, but you kinda understood why he wasn't saying it. It still sorta aroused you, though. “Fuck.” You two were already this far gone…maybe a kiss could be fine. He needed something to do with his mouth other than say embarrassing things. The hand that cupped your breast moved to the back of your neck. He pulled you close and closed the gap between your lips with a groan.

"Fu-!" You were cut off in the middle of your profane moan by his lips on yours. You weren't expecting it at all, but you were certainly not mad about it. You kissed him back, shivering as you heard his moan, the kiss open-mouthed and sloppy as you kept your hips moving against his.

He slid his hand from the back of your neck up into your hair, taking a fistful of it and holding tightly. He yanked your head back, taking his lips off yours as he instead moved his attention to your neck- nipping just a little as he left love bites right in the center of your throat. You said to be rough; hopefully this was fine for you... “Steve!” you yelped out in pleasure as he yanked on your hair. Shit. You said his name. With the way he’d been very clearly avoiding yours…hopefully it wouldn’t upset him too much. Hearing you call his name like that made him gasp out. He hadn’t heard it like that in a long time. Shit. He almost finished just hearing that.

You were the one squirming from his touch now; he was being much more rough than you could’ve anticipated, but…you liked it. A lot. You let out another loud moan as he nipped at your neck, your head tilted back to expose all of your skin to him. “Sw-sweetheart…” you moaned out, taking his suggestion seriously as you figured it was the safest thing to call him. “O-on second thought…” He stuttered out. “Don’t call me anything.”

"Christ," You tried to roll your eyes, but they ended up rolling to the back of your head instead from the pleasure. "You're so...particular." You were always a name-caller during sex, but whatever. You were lucky enough he agreed to fucking in the first place. You shouldn't test him.

Steve began bucking his hips into yours desperately, his arm still holding you tightly and maneuvering you however he pleased to do so. God. He was close. He could feel it, and he bet you could too. He was twitching violently, leaking at the tip as he kept thrusting into you. Every time his hips hit yours, he groaned out in pleasure. Every thrust into you made you whine and whimper and clench around him, and when you did, you could feel every little twitch and vein he had. You could feel him getting close…and you weren’t too far yourself.

“Y-you… you’ve got me close…” He admitted with a shaky voice, his lips still pressed to your skin. “I-I know…” You moaned out, your voice shaky and high-pitched as you stared down at him, your hand on his head, holding him against your neck. You almost felt too good to gloat about him being close for you. Almost.

“I can feel…how close you are for me…” You just couldn’t resist teasing him, but you were just as close as he was, the orgasm slowly bubbling up inside of your tummy, the coil winding tighter and tighter.

Christ, you had such a filthy mouth. He wondered for a moment if you got it from his girl, or if his girl got it from you. With the grip on your hair, he pulled again, forcing you to bend back away from him a little. His eyes trailed down your body for just a moment. He could almost see your sternum now. He was absolutely going to scold you later.

"F-fuck...St-" You shut your mouth before you could moan his name again, completely obsessed with the way he was handling you so roughly, the hand tugging in your hair making you moan loudly. Never in a million years did you think Steve Rogers of all people would fuck you like this (or at all). Maybe he was more desperate than you thought.

Just after a couple more thrusts, he was fully undone. He quickly pulled you off of him, throwing you onto your back beside him on the bed. Maybe not so tactful, and definitely not polite. But he wasn’t thinking rationally right now. You were close, really close, when suddenly, you weren't feeling him inside of you anymore. You stared at him as you landed on the bed, watching the thick streams of cum pump out of him. Oh. Your friend was right. He does cum a lot. "Fuck..." Your voice was a low whisper as you watched him finish. Damn. If he had done that inside of you, you surely would've came along with him.

Once he realised what had happened, he was…really embarrassed. Even though you said you liked it rough- that was a bit much, he thought. It also certainly wasn’t gentlemanly for him to cum before you did. Shit.

Steve was breathing heavily, shuddering as his chest heaved. He was holding himself in his hand, semen dripping off his tip and down his hand and onto his thighs. He was nervous to look back towards you; he had a feeling he pissed you off. He hadn’t meant to react that way; it just happened.

“Shit, sweetheart.” He looked to you, his face fully flushed and sweat dripping down his brow. How did he break a sweat? You two didn’t even go at it for that long. “I-I’m sorry…” He sounded shy, his voice shaking. That might’ve been from how hard he was trying to catch his breath, though.

There were a lot of embarrassing things Steve had done, but this might take the cake. Being desperate enough to agree to sleep with his girl’s best friend was already bad, but then not even getting her off when she was the one who wanted it? This would definitely keep him up at night.

You were still staring at the load of cum he let out, watching it drip onto his hand and thighs. You had half a mind to start lapping it up, but realized that would definitely scare him away. You were crazy, but not that crazy.

"Don't apologize," You almost wanted to tease him, but it was clear by the way he was beet red and sweating that he was very embarrassed, so you let it go. Plus, it had been even longer for him since he'd last had sex, so it was probably hard to even last as long as he did in the first place.

"It still...felt good..." You shifted a little, leaning over the edge of the bed to look for a towel or something he could clean himself up with. It had still felt good - that wasn't a lie - but you were a little bummed that you hadn't gotten to cum. Oh well.

“W-we can try again…if you just give me a minute…” He offered sheepishly. He was always such a people pleaser. “I don’t…I don’t want you to not…” He was so shy and so flustered, he almost looked how he did when he first came out of the ice again. Clearly, this wasn’t territory he’d ever navigated before.

Steve’s eyes stayed on you as you searched the room, and he figured he should help. He looked over the side of the bed he was on and saw a pile of towels, so he grabbed one of those to clean himself up. As soon as he was done, he let his eyes rest on you again. Only while you weren’t looking at him. You were pretty, and you had a nice body. Most guys would’ve been head over heels at the idea of sleeping with you. He kinda just felt a little guilty though. His girl and Bucky weren’t around anymore- if they were, then he wouldn’t even be living with you in the first place- but he still felt as if he’d betrayed both of them by sleeping with you.

To be honest though, he was giving up hope they would ever come back. So maybe sleeping with you wasn’t the worst choice he could make these days.

You chuckled a little. He was kinda cute when he was all shy and flustered. You did sorta want to try again, but you already put him through enough by convincing him to do it in the first place. You'd feel guilty if he felt like he had to do it again. Your face was flushed as you watched him clean himself up.

You noticed - just for a moment, out of the corner of your eye - his eyes looked over you while you were looking away from him. Was he checking you out...after you fucked? Good god, this man was strange. You did the same thing though, letting your eyes drift across his body. He was nice to look at. Especially when you hadn't seen a body in years.

"It's okay, Steve..." You ran a hand through your hair, sighing softly. "I'm not gonna make you do that..."

He wasn’t foreign to being rejected, but it did make him feel a certain way coming from you. He decided to ignore it, though. “Yeah…okay…” He looked away from you, readjusting his pants back up over his hips. “Do you want me back on the couch…?” Steve looked back towards you, awaiting your answer. He wouldn’t be surprised if you sent him away after that. It wouldn’t hurt his feelings.

Is this how modern-day “hook-ups” were? He hated how it was making him feel. Aside from the guilt, he was justfeeling embarrassed. “I won’t mind…if you don’t want me here anymore after that.” He laughed a little, reaching a hand up to rub at the back of his neck.

You quirked your brow as you looked over him again. Was he seriously moping about the fact that you'd said no to him for his sake? You almost laughed. Your eyes drifted down to his pelvis as he pulled his pants up; he was still hard, causing a little tent effect in his pants. You smirked, biting your lower lip as you looked back up at his eyes. "Oh...well, if you really wanna get me off, I won't mind," You giggled, shifting close to him again. "It looks like...you could go for round two." Not only did you not want him to leave you all alone in this big bed, but...you did want to cum. It was almost unbearable how badly you needed release.

“Oh, is that how you feel?” He laughed. You certainly weren't subtle. “I don’t know…you already told me not to…I already put the pants back on…” Steve had a bit of a smirk on his lip. It was refreshing to see him have an emotion other than like…sadness or depression or despair. "Well...I was just trying to spare you the chore of having to sleep with me again..." You joked, laughing a little. "But since you insisted..." Really though, you didn't want to make him do anything he didn't want to...but it didn't seem like he was against the idea. He'd surely tell you no if he didn't want to. Oh. You noticed the smirk on his lips and, wow. You hadn't seen him wear that expression in...years. It looked...damn good on him, you feared.

Maybe this was good for him…for both of you. “I did tell you you’d only have to give me a minute…” He muttered, leaning back onto the stack of pillows again. His cheeks flushed deep red as he thought for a moment. “Uhm…how do you want to…?” He really was new to this. He didn’t know how to act right with any sexual partner that wasn’t his girl.

Your face flushed at his question...you weren't sure, actually, how you wanted to go about this. You could...ride him, maybe? Sit on his face? No...no, that might give him a heart attack.

"I dunno, Steve. Why don't you tell me?" Best let him decide so you don't accidentally kill him.

His cheeks flushed, causing him to be a little flustered. “You want… me…to pick? I…you…” He stared at you, blinking a few times. “You have more…experience…” His voice was getting softer the more we went on, like he was too shy to share his thoughts. “You must know…what you like…like…what makes you feel the best…” Steve sat back up, not breaking eye contact with you. “You like being on top, right…?” His cheeks were incredibly red now. “We can just do that…if you want…” His girl liked being on top too. He wondered which one of you topped when you two…oh. Oh no. He really shouldn’t be having dirty thoughts about the girls like that, but…it made him grow harder to think of it. He brought his fist to his mouth, covering it as he coughed to clear his throat. “J-just…just tell me what you need me to do.” He offered.

You giggled, watching his flustered reaction. You hadn't meant to make him react that way, but you definitely didn't mind seeing it. It was almost...charming. You could see why your best friend was so obsessed with him. "Oh, Steve," You mused, a smirk on your face as you slowly climbed on top of him. "You're kinda cute." He was, especially allembarrassed like this. It nearly made you wetter. "I do like being on top...that should work for me. "

He watched you climb up onto him closely. The anticipation made him more excited. Jeez. He better not cum too quickly again this time. Doing it once was already bad enough, twice?? He’d never live it down. God. You were so filthy-minded.

How did he know that you liked topping? Did you just have that vibe...? You wondered if he liked women who topped more than topping women. If there was one thing you knew about your best friend, it was that she loved to top. "Just make me cum." You declared, your eyes filled with lust as you stared down into his.

“I-I know that much..!” He protested, still fully flustered. Steve moved his hands to sit on your hips again. He was going to have to try really hard not to handle you like that again. Hopefully he’d have a little more self-control this time. “Go ahead.” He mumbled. “Lead the way.”

You let out another giggle at his words. It was fun, teasing him and seeing him all shy. Moving your hand to the waistband of his pants again, you pulled them down enough to get him out. He was still hard - good. Was that a super soldier thing? Staying hard for a while? No man other than Bucky (well, and now Steve) usually stayed that hard after cumming. Your shorts were still pulled to the side, seeing as you had never fixed them after the first round, so you lowered yourself down to rub against him again. One of the main components of the super soldier serum was enhanced stamina- that was for every part of the body…including his…area. He was so sensitive though, feeling you on him again so soon after he’d already cum. Cripes. He was going to do his best to hold off- he promised. His only job right now was to get you off.

"Shit..." Even though it had been a few minutes, you were still really close. You lowered yourself down onto him completely, letting out a loud moan behind gritted teeth as you felt him fill you up. The stretch was so delicious- so insane. His hands squeezed your hip bones as you lowered yourself. He hadn’t really meant to, but…fuck. You were so small…so tight and so warm and so…fuck. You moved a hand to cover your mouth and bit down on it, trying to muffle your sound. You were afraid you'd say his name or 'sweetheart' or 'baby' again, so it was best if you just kept your mouth shut entirely.

Steve groaned, rutting his hips up into you a bit as you sat on him. You couldn't help but immediately clench around him. He was so big, and you felt so full...fuck. You were going to be the one to cum embarrassingly fast...You bit at your hand again as he bucked his hips into you, still trying your best to be quiet. You didn't need Steve going all drama queen on you again.

You felt amazing. He noticed an absence of noise, though, and opened his eyes to see you covering your mouth. He lifted his hand to your wrist, pulling your hand away from your mouth gently. “I-it’s…it’s okay…sweetheart. I won’t…make a deal out of it…this time.”

You were surprised when you felt his hand on your wrist, your eyes fluttering open to meet his big baby blues. His face was flushed again, and he already looked like he was going to burst soon. Damn. You let him pull your hand away, a loud moan escaping your mouth as soon as it was uncovered. He wouldn't make a deal out of it this time? You thought it was best to test that theory. "Whatever...you say...sweetheart." Your voice was breathy, and you wore a smirk as you spoke. You began to roll your hips down against him, riding him painstakingly slowly. It was to tease him, but really...it was getting hard for you to even want to go slow like that.

Christ, you might be the death of him. Teasing like that still. Hadn’t you learned your lesson about that? “Sh-shit…” Steve threw his head back onto the pillows, his hips bucking into you deeper as he did. He tried to match your speed- slow, teasing, anticipatory. He couldn’t stop twitching.

"You...have such a dirty mouth..." You teased, still not fully used to hearing Steve swear like that. You didn't mind, though. It was kinda nice knowing that you made him feel good enough to say bad language words. He ignored your teasing, instead deciding to focus on just making you feel good. And it seemed to be working from what he could see. The reactions you were having…God. It really was a nice little ego boost. It was definitely making up for earlier, he thought.

His hands found their way back to your hips, holding you tightly in place as they ground against each other. Jeez. Maybe you were right. Maybe he did need this, and he just hadn’t thought about it. It was definitely a good distraction from how terrible everything was now. And he did feel a little lighter after cumming. God. You were going to turn him into a pervert, more than his girl already had at least. You shivered when he grabbed at your hips, another part of your body that was typically sensitive. Your heart ached again for a moment - Bucky was obsessed with your hips - but you pushed the thought away again. Just focus on feeling good, on cumming. Depression later.

You focused your mind on how good he felt, and God, he felt so good. You tried to keep a slow pace on him, but when his hips started bucking into you, you couldn't help but speed up just a bit. Feeling you speed up, so did his breaths as he kept pace with your hips. There were knots in his stomach watching how your body and face were contorting in pleasure. “…feel good…?” He panted out between his heaving breaths, watching you closely still with half-lidded eyes.

Never in a million years did you think Steve Rogers of all people would be fucking you like this, making you feel this good, but...you weren't complaining. No wonder your bestie fucked him so much - he felt good as fuck! "Y-yeah...you feel...good..." You could barely get the words out, looking down at him with a red face and half-lidded eyes. You kept your pace on him, hoping it felt good for him too. You knew he already came, but you didn't want him sitting there feeling like nothing. Based on his heavy breaths and matching half-lidded eyes, though...you thought he was probably feeling alright.

With a shaky hand, he moved his thumb down towards your core, hovering over your clit for a moment before deciding to go through with his thoughts. He pressed gently, not wanting to hurt you. He circled your sensitive bud so carefully, the rest of his hand resting against your stomach as he pulled at the little skin you had there.

"O-oh...fuck..." You threw your head back as you whined out, feeling his hand against your clit. That...that was going to make you cum pretty quickly. He was being so gentle with your clit, it was almost teasing. You bucked your hips, pressing yourself further into his hand as you moaned loudly again. It didn’t take much for him to get the hint- you weren’t so sensitive there, judging by how you were grinding yourself into his hand. He pressed a little harder, trying to gauge the right pressure to use. His eyes darted down to your chest, just for a moment, watching as you bounced against him. It got him just a little more flustered, so he moved his gaze back to your face.

You let out another loud yelp as Steve pressed into your clit harder, hitting the perfect amount of pressure to drive you absolutely wild. "I-I'm close..." You whined out, reaching up your hand to grab at your own breast, needing something to grip onto.

Hearing your words of praise caused him to twitch a little more. God. You were so dirty. He’d really learned to like it with his girl, though, so he didn’t mind it at all. “That…was…the goal.” He shuddered out between heavy breaths. He was happy to hear it; he really seemed to be redeeming himself with this second round. He hadn’t expected to care so much about what you thought about him as a sexual partner.

Sometimes his girl made him dirty talk her to help her finish, and he always obliged even though he didn’t like it that much. Maybe you were the same way...

He moaned your name softly, seemingly flustering himself as he did, judging by the heat on his cheeks. “I want…you…to cum…” He was panting out the words now. “Can you…cum for me, sweetheart…?” As much as he said he opposed it, the dirty talk worked for him too. His other hand gripped onto your hip harder as he kept thrusting and rubbing against you. His movements became sloppy and almost lazy as he tried his best to hold off his own orgasm.

Fuck. Was Captain America of all people really speaking to you like this? His girl must’ve taught him well, because it was driving you fucking nuts.

“St-steve…” You moaned out his name again; you couldn’t help it. Not when you were so close, and he felt this good. And the way he moaned your name out…fuck, it was like you automatically tightened around him when you heard it. “I-is that…what you want…?” Your face was entirely red, your words slurring and your voice whiny as you felt the orgasm bubbling up. “You want…me to cum for you…?” All it took was a few more thrusts and rubs against your achey cunt for you to cum.

You came violently — your body trembling and convulsing in pleasure as you dug your nails into his huge biceps. Your mouth hung open as your eyes rolled back, riding out your orgasm as you moaned incoherent words. You were totally fucked out.

Feeling you cum against him- feeling your walls clench and watching you convulse got him so close. Seeing your face as you finished, though? God. “Sw...sweetheart...” He stuttered out, consciously trying to slow down his thrusts. You felt so good, though.

“Sweetheart...sweetheart hop off…” You weren't listening, though; you were too focused on your own undoing.

You couldn’t pay attention to anything Steve was saying; it wasn’t even registering in your mind that he spoke at all. All you could think about was how good the waves of pleasure felt in your body, the first orgasm you'd had in years taking over you entirely.

He came again-inside this time. He was trying really hard to not do that, but he couldn’t put it off any longer. Steve moved his hands to cup your ass, holding tightly as he put one last strong thrust deep inside of you, his back arching as his head was thrown back. Fuck. That was even better than the first time. His thoughts thinned out, his breath heavy, his brow sweaty. But then after a moment he realised what he’d done. “Fuck. Fuck. Sw...Sweetheart...” He seemed to be in a panic now, face fully flushed and red hot.

You felt him cum inside of you and moaned out loud again. You hadn’t entirely finished cumming yet, and you rode out your orgasms together, bodies slick with sweat and trembling. Fucking hell. You gripped onto his arms still, watching him come down from his own orgasm as you did the same. Your breaths were heavy and panting, your eyes half-lidded and face flushed as you stared at him. You felt drunk from the pleasure.

“Wh...what…? Steve, what’s wrong?” You were finally remembering how to think and speak when you saw the panic in his eyes and heard it in his voice. Shit. Had you done something wrong? “D-did I hurt you?” You asked, looking into his eyes with concern as you watched him freak out.

Explaining to your girl that you slept with her best friend is one thing, but getting her best friend pregnant? He waspanicking. “Y-you…no I’m not hurt…you didn’t let me pull out…” Interesting choice of words from the Soldier who’d pulled you off of him with ease not even half an hour ago. “Are you…are you on ‘the pill’?” He still wasn’t quite sure what that was, but his girl had been very fond of it during their time together. “Do you need me to go get you the pill?” He asked nervously. Shit. He should’ve asked you about it before he agreed to this. He was embarrassed he hadn’t.

You just stared at him for a second.

Was he really panicking about that? How had he forgotten…? Didn’t let him pull out was a bold accusation, seeing as he’d just tossed you off of him before, but whatever. You almost wanted to laugh. “Steve…you’re so cute,” You said, watching him freak out about pills. It was kinda cute, seeing him be so concerned for you. “I’m...I'm a Widow, remember?” You looked down at him, and he still looked good: flushed cheeks, hair sticking to his face, sweaty forehead. You could really almost go for a third round.

“Not an issue with me. No need to panic.” You guessed it made sense he forgot; it’s not like you often talked about your childhood mutilation with him. It was something that never really bothered you that much — you'd never wanted kids, and if you really did, you could adopt. Plus, it made a lot of guys like fucking you since they never had to worry about pulling out.

Oh.

Oh jeez. He really was just going to keep embarrassing himself with you, wasn’t he? He should’ve stuck to not talking with you. His cheeks were bright red now. “I’m…I’m so sorry…I forgot…about that.” His girl had told him that before, but he certainly hadn’t thought of it much after he found out. A heavy sigh came from his mouth, his chest heaving as he did. He closed his eyes, taking a minute to gather himself. He was so sensitive right now, especially with him still inside. The serum always made him bounce back fast, and he was already getting hard again. One time his girl and him kept going at it for almost four hours. He still wasn’t sure how she’d kept up with him for that long… He shook the thought from his head- even though he really liked that thought.

“…Did it work…?” He opened one eye to look at you. “Do you feel…better now?” He looked to be so flustered talking with you about this so plainly.

You just chuckled a little, watching Steve be so flustered and embarrassed. It was nice to see him like that, as anything other than depressed, really. You tried to regulate your heavy breaths and fast-beating heart as you stared at him. Damn. You really needed that. That was…really good; it almost made you sad to think this was most likely your last time having sex until…god knows when.

“Y-yeah…” You could feel him still twitching inside. Holy shit, he recharged fast. You were almost crazy enough to ask for a round three. “Yeah…it felt good. I feel…good.” You were almost shy to say it, but only because it was so weird to admit to Steve of all people. “Did…do you…feel better?” It seemed he enjoyed it, despite feeling weird about it at first. You just hoped it had felt good for him to get his rocks off too.

Steve listened closely, but looked embarrassed the whole time. “Y-yea! But uhm…” He had both eyes on yours, but turned his head away from you as he continued speaking. You looked at him for a moment - he was stuttering and blushing and rambling. Did he...not like it? Was there something wrong?

“I-Im not sure…if it’s the same with Buck or not, but I’m real sensitive…” He turned his head to look at your face again, but it almost looked like he didn’t want to be. “Yknow…because of the serum…” He was rambling now; he didn’t want to be rude, but maybe getting straight to the point with this would be best.

“Can you get off of me, please?” He murmured. Geez. That sounded way worse than he meant for it to. “I mean..! Just because it’ll start hurting…it’s not that I don’t like you. I mean I don’t! Not like that, like we’re friends.” Oh, this was bad. If you didn’t put a stop to it, there was no telling how long he would babble on for.

"Oh!" Your face was flushed as you quickly - but gently - pulled yourself off of him and instead moved to sit next to him. You were so used to cockwarming with Bucky, you forgot it can make other men really sensitive. "Sorry..." You didn't mean to make him uncomfortable. As soon as you were off of him, though, you could feel all of his cum leaking out of you, dripping down your thighs. Fuck. Even for a second round, it was still a lot. You blushed as she felt it. His rambling was a little charming, though; you couldn't help but let out a little giggle.

"All better now, Steve?" You turned your head to face him as you leaned against the headboard next to him, looking for the towel he'd used earlier. He noticed your eyes scanning the bed and grabbed the towel from the floor on his side of the bed, handing it to you. “Here.” Steve wasn’t entirely sure how he felt after that. Certainly...less pent up, a little less angry…maybe even less depressed, but…with you? Just thinking about it caused his cheeks to stay flushed. Geez. “Oh, thanks.” You took the towel and cleaned yourself as gracefully as you could before tossing it onto the floor. You weren’t entirely sure how Steve felt. You didn’t want him feeling guilty or regretting it, but you were worried he might be. “Are you…okay?” You asked, meeting his eyes. You didn’t want him to leave the bed still, but if he was uncomfortable sleeping next to you after that, you'd understand.

He sighed, closing his eyes for a moment as he tried to…reverse how worked up you'd already gotten him again. Once he heard you talking to him, though, he turned his head to look at your face. “Y-yea…” His cheeks were still flushed, his eyes still half-lidded, his breathing still ragged. You looked him over for a moment — damn. He looked wrecked. Face red, chest heaving, and his lips slightly swollen from kissing. If you weren’t careful, you'd get worked up again.

“I hope…it was helpful for you.” You murmured out. He did look slightly less tense.

Steve noticed how your eyes lingered on him, and he shyly readjusted his pants…again. You were fully dressed still, so he certainly wasn’t going to just sit beside you exposing himself like that. You watched as he put himself away. Damn. You wouldn't have minded that view for a little longer. Oh well.

“Yeah.” He offered a soft half-smile. He didn’t want to make you feel awkward about it at all. “Just…convenient. Right?” His cheeks were still so flushed as he kept his eyes on yours. It was hard to wrap his mind around the fact that he even agreed to do it. He wasn’t really…as upset as he thought he would be, though. Sex was never a priority in his life before, not that anyone was throwing themselves at him pre-serum anyway- but he hadn’t realised just how pent up he’d been without it the last couple of years. He felt good, but he was shy to admit it. “Are you..? Okay?” You seemed very adamant about making sure he was; it made him curious if you were asking for your own sake and not his.

"Yeah...convenient." And also Steve was really hot and good at fucking. But you didn't want to say all that. It had been really good; you felt lighter, less tense, a little bit more relaxed. Orgasming had always been a great way to release for you any time you'd been stressed - and clearly, even though it was with Steve, this was no exception. You almost tensed up again thinking about the fact that you'd probably not get laid again for at least another two years.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm good." You played with a strand of your hair before turning to look at him. "Um...are you...still gonna stay in the bed with me?" You didn't really want to be alone in the bed; it was the reason you'd asked him in here in the first place, but if he was uncomfortable now, you weren't going to keep him hostage here...

Once he was settled again, he sat back up, throwing one leg off the side of the bed. He paused, though, hearing you speak up again. The flush on his cheeks grew just a little deeper as he turned his attention back to you. “Yea…yea I will. That’s why I came in here in the first place.” He gave an awkward little laugh, reaching his hand up to rub the back of his neck. “I’ll be right back.” He wanted to say ‘don’t wait up’, but considering you'd asked him there for his presence, he thought that would be a silly thing to say.

"Oh, okay! Good," Your face was a little red as you spoke, still feeling a little shy about the fact that you wanted to sleep in bed next to Steve. It was his fault, really, for having such a huge bed that made you feel so lonely when you laid in it...

Steve reached over to you, taking your hand in his gently before giving it a soft squeeze as his smile for you persisted. Without saying anything else, he stood, collected all the dirty towels he could see on the floor of the room, and walked off towards the bathroom.

It made perfect sense that Steve would be a shower after sex type of guy, so you weren't really surprised to see him head towards the bathroom. You did feel bad he picked up all of your dirty towels though. You could still feel his cum leaking out of you, and it was making you flustered.

Christ, if anyone needed to shower, it was you. "Don't use all the hot water!" You called out after him, realizing you should probably take a shower after he's done. You were lazy, but you were full of cum, and he probably didn't want to sleep next to a girl who was leaking his own semen. If you were his girl, he would’ve just told you to come shower with him. The thought caused his cheeks to flush a bit. “I won’t be long, don’t worry.” He called back from the hallway. Oh yeah. Steve had been in the military, and he apparently never dropped the habit of taking 3-second showers, or whatever it was they did there. He was in and out so quick, you hardly had time to even realize he was gone.

The showers Steve took were incredibly quick- muscle memory from being in the military. They weren’t allowed the luxury of comfort when he was touring. His girl used to make him shower longer- spend time with her in there and force him to enjoy the moment. He didn’t enjoy much anymore.

Finding comfort within you, though- that was new. And also, a little scary. It couldn’t have been more than 5 minutes before he returned back to the bedroom, and he was drying his hair with a t-shirt. “All the towels are dirty.” He sounded more upset than he looked, but he let out a soft laugh as he looked to you. “Shower’s all yours. Don’t get my sheets wet.” He teased.

You laughed a little, watching him dry his hair with a shirt. It was...sorta cute, sorta...domestic. You'd been living with him this whole time, but you hadn't really been living with him. Maybe that wouldn't be so bad. If you could get rid of the guilty depression nagging at your insides. "Feel free to use my robe," You joked with a snort as you stood up. "I'm sure it'll fit you." You stretched as you stood, your tanktop showing your midriff as you raised your arms above your head.

Your shower was much longer than Steve's had been, somewhere between 15 and 20 minutes, and you felt a little bad for making him wait up for you. You came back in the room wearing a new, cleaner set of skimpy pajamas (it was all you owned to sleep in besides lingerie, and that was NOT appropriate), and you too, drying your hair with some random shirt.

Steve was lying on the bed, scrolling through his phone. Instead of looking sleepy at all, though, he just looked…focused. “Was there enough hot water?” He asked, not bothering to look up towards you as he kept his eyes on his phone. “No, your 5-second shower used it all up,” You joked, tossing the T-shirt aside. You were dry enough, so you figured it was fine to climb back into bed.

As you came closer, you could see his phone screen. He was scrolling through old photos of him and your best friend. He never took them himself- she would always do them and then text them to him. And then she would take his phone from him and save them for him. As much as she liked making fun of him for being too old for modern technology, she still helped him with all of it without complaint. Once he realised that you could see what he was doing, he locked his phone and placed it face down on the nightstand, instead turning his attention back to you.

You definitely saw what he’d been looking at, but you didn’t say anything. You did the same thing often, casually scrolling through her Instagram and looking at all your slutty pics. You missed her so much that it hurt.

“You’re not tired yet?” You asked casually, reaching over the side of the bed. You grabbed a stray hairbrush from the floor and began to lazily run it through her semi-dried hair. Your darker roots had grown in quite a bit, and you noticed it any time you stole a glance at yourself in the mirror. Your best friend had always been the one to help you bleach it.

He laughed a little, but it wasn’t genuine. “Oh, I’m exhausted. I just thought it’d be rude to fall asleep before you got back.” He was only half joking. "I would've tickled you awake anyway," You joked, tossing the hairbrush aside. You weren't used to taking care of yourself anymore - not even brushing your hair - but if you were going to actually be like, hanging out with Steve...the least you could do was not look a total mess. As you shifted, your ribs showed a bit from underneath your tanktop.

Spending time with you was actually helping to lift his spirits. Who knew it could’ve been such a simple Band-Aid this whole time. Instead, this whole time you'd just been eating meals silently, pushing your forks against your plates and wordlessly passing each other around the apartment like ghosts.

His eye fixated on your torso as your shirt lifted up. He didn’t bother to hide his frown. He wouldn’t ever be as small as you again, but he’d lost a bit of muscle himself since the blip happened. Your name escaped his lips, his voice just a tad more serious than it usually was- which was already a lot.

You turned, letting yourself lie fully in the bed next to him, facing him again. He looked...unhappy. Mad? Concerned? You couldn't tell, but he was frowning. "Yeah?" You were a little anxious yourself. His tone was serious...too serious. Did he really regret it already? He sure seemed to enjoy it, considering how he came fast and hard both times...

Steve rolled over to face you completely; looking over his shoulder wouldn’t work once you were in the bed as well.

Despite his strong start, he seemed to be at a loss for words for just a moment. He sighed, finally letting his eyes meet yours again. “Listen…I’m…I’m not ready. To move on. Honestly, I don’t think I ever will be, but…” His eyes scanned your body up and down before returning to meet your gaze. “We…we need to start being better.” A soft flush danced on his cheeks as he spoke. Hopefully you'd at least think about taking him seriously and not just laugh it off. “I…I can see your ribs. It shouldn’t be like that. You need…” He paused for just a moment, and sighed again. “We need to stop skipping meals.” That was a good start, he thought.

Steve was right. It was time you started...well, trying to live life again. As much as you loved to mope around and be stuck in the past...clearly nothing would come of it. They're either gone forever, or they'll come back somehow, but dwelling on it won't change the outcome.

You nodded, deciding to take Steve seriously for like, the first time in your life instead of just making fun of him. Maybe it was time you two actually be, like...friends. Not just people who hung out with each other because you were dating each other's best friends. "I...don't want to forget them, but..." You sighed, keeping your eyes on Steve's. "I...want to start living again." Your face was flushed as you thought about what you were going to say next. "Um, with you, maybe. We can talk to each other, hang out and stuff..." You averted your gaze, feeling a little shy to say it out loud.

Being vulnerable with Steve of all people was not easy. But if you were going to start being there for each other... You looked down at yourself. Your ribs were poking out a little, and your wrists had gotten so small that your favorite bracelets you wore were loose. Okay, maybe he was right about that too. "Um...I can try. But only if you do too. You eat less than I do."

Oh. You were handling this much better than Steve was anticipating you to. You were actually…taking him seriously. He listened to you intently, keeping his eyes on your face as you spoke. You seemed genuine; he was glad.

“Don’t worry…we won’t forget them.” That was a promise. He wouldn’t dare. They were both far too important to him- to both of you. “That…that sounds nice.” He gave a soft smile. You'd spent far too long waiting for everything to change on its own. This was the least you two could do now, he thought. Build a real relationship as friends, be there for each other in ways that mattered… Steve had Natasha and…well…Natasha. The rest of the Avengers were still around, but everything was different now. Everyone was mad; no one wanted to connect. You, though…you didn’t have anyone with the way Natasha had withdrawn herself from everyone except Steve. The least he could do was keep you properly company.

You let your eyes meet his again, and you noticed his soft smile and lightly flushed cheeks in the dim moonlit room. That was good...you weren't the only one feeling shy. And he seemed to really be genuine.

"I...think it sounds nice too." Why was your heart racing so fast? Had it really been that long since you'd made a friend that you were this nervous about it? Well...actually...yeah. You hadn't made any friends in over a decade. "Maybe I'd eat more if...the food you made wasn't such ass." You shrugged, a little smirk pulling at your lips. It was a joke, of course - Steve's cooking was fine - but just because you agreed to be friends with him didn't mean you had to stop teasing him.

“Oh, okay.” He rolled his eyes, but laughed as he did. “In the 40s we just boiled everything…be thankful I’m not doing that for your food.” His eyes quickly returned to yours, his smile still on his lips. “I’d like to see you try to cook…last I recall you just always ordered takeout.”

"Really, Steve?" You laughed again as you looked at him. "Are we doing this? 'Cause we can do this. I can bring up all the bad stuff they used to feed us in the red room - if they fed us at all. And then you'll feel bad for starting it..." You chuckled along with him as you watched him roll onto his back. You guessed you both ate shitty foods in your pasts.

“That’s not fair, I wasn’t sharing my trauma...!” He argued, turning his head to look at you again as he laughed. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed so much in one day. He was glad you invited him in; it was really lifting his spirits.

Maybe getting closer with her wouldn’t be the worst idea. You basically only had each other at this point. At least…consistently. Which was the only way that truly mattered right now. Steve rolled onto his back again, looking up at the ceiling as he put both hands behind his head. “I could stand to regain some muscle, I guess…” He mumbled, commenting on how you proposed he wasn’t eating enough either. You were right, though; it was just impossible for him to look as skinny as you.

"Yeah, seriously," You stretched out a little, letting out a small yawn. You had no idea what time it was, but it was definitely late in the a.m, and being so close to a warm body again was making you sleepy. "You're starting to look like me," you teased, jokingly flexing your arm. Your bicep was comically small compared to his unflexed arm. Steve didn't look all that different to you in body weight, but you thought maybe if he ate better it would bring some color back into his face. Plus, you thought it would be nice if you actually ate together at the table instead of sitting there in silence and playing with your food.

Steve let out a soft yawn, moving his hand to cover his mouth. It was probably 3 or 4 am now if he had to guess. Farpast his bedtime, whatever time it was. Grabbing at the blanket again, he threw it on top of you before adjusting it over himself as well. Seeing as how you'd just…well…he didn’t really see the point in trying to keep his distance from you now. Unless you wanted it, then of course he would comply. You made him realise just how much he’d missed the touch of another human, though. He wanted to be selfish and lie close to you in your sleep. Hopefully you wouldn’t mind too much.

You just laughed again, happily letting Steve cover you with the blanket. You were glad he wasn't being shy about it anymore - the whole reason you'd asked him to come sleep in here in the first place was so that you wouldn't feel so lonely. You were a cuddler at heart - probably from the lack of love in your childhood - so you couldn't help but scoot just a little closer to Steve. You and your best friend had always held each other in your sleep, and you practically slept on top of Bucky most nights, so it was just a little weird that there was a body in the bed with you and you weren't actively smushed against it.

You were touching just the slightest bit, and his body was so warm. It instantly made you feel more relaxed, like maybe you could get a good night's sleep for the first time in years. Hopefully Steve wouldn't be bothered by the closeness, considering he'd just literally been inside of you not too long ago.

Steve lifted one hand to sit on your hip- over the covers- he didn’t want to be too intimate.

“Good night, Kid.” He yawned again softly.

"Night, Steve," You said, your voice deep with sleepiness. You felt even more relaxed and comfortable when he gently rested his hand on you. This was...nice. You slept soundly for the first time in over two years that night. You hadn't thought Steve lying next to you would help that much, but it really did. Well, the sex probably helped too. But still. It helped more than you could've imagined.

That innate feeling he got for his friends came creeping back into his chest. He had a strong need to protect you and keep you safe going forward. He was glad you had decided to ask for his company- he could better keep an eye on you that way. That much was certain.

It took a while for him to fall asleep, regardless of how comfy he was. He was distracted by watching you as you slept- how your chest rose and fell, how your face looked so peaceful…how quiet you were while unconscious.

Eventually, Steve fell asleep as well, his hand still on your hip.

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