Writer, artist, nerd.... with a twisted imagination. I live for music, books, movies and drag queens. I'm a sucker for a boy in makeup, I can't help it.
Hey there, glad to see you back. :) I gotta ask as I'm confused as usual.. The beginning is "A Stranger to Some" or "It’s A Game, Did You Pass?".. I remember as the latest being the beginning but u said follow tags from bottom up? Thanks.
It's A Game, Did You Pass is the beginning. I went back long after and wrote the beginning again, but from Jared's perspective....which is the current chapter I'm posting :)Hope this clears it up!!
I watched her put her purse back on her shoulder, brush off her knees and turn to head back into the bar before I even put myself back together.
By the time I caught my breath and walked back inside, she was seated with her friends, her back to the crowd, like nothing had happened. With an obvious change in the tension of my shoulders, I sank back at the table with my own group and drank some of my water. I glanced her way every few minutes but she never looked towards me again until she stood up to leave. She waited for her friends to lead the way before turning in my direction. With a quick, dirty grin, she waved and was gone.
I smiled to myself, a foreign feeling lately, and rested my head back on the booth, closing my eyes. Without any prompting from me, she knew exactly what to do to get me to relax and did it with no expectation of anything in return. She took care of me...she was the only one who had. So why did I push her away?
I waited for almost two weeks to call her. Not because I wanted to...entirely, I just didn't have a free second to myself. And if I’m being completely honest, I wasn’t really sure what to say.
But that night...that night I honestly felt like I was going to blow. That day killed the last bit of patience I had in me leaving me voiceless from yelling, and shaking with rage.
I locked myself in the house, alone and paced until I wore down a path on the floor. My muscles ached from tension and behind my eyes beat a sickening rhythm of throbbing pain. No matter what I did, I couldn't seem to calm down. It had been a long time since I could remember ever having been wound this tightly.
I let myself fall back onto the couch, the ball I had been squeezing in my hand as I paced, still between my white knuckles, and closed my eyes. Breathe, she said...how was I supposed to breathe when it fell as if the walls were closing in and suffocating me?
I opened my eyes slowly and tossed the ball in the air above my head, catching it and then repeating the action until I gave up and sat forward letting the ball fall and roll somewhere behind the couch. I dug my phone out of my pocket and scrolled through my contacts until I found her name.
I haven’t been on this blog in SO long, and apparently message notifications have not been working…for a really, really long fucking time. There are so many!! :3
To those that have asked, yes, I am ok. I’m great in fact. No, I don’t have anything new (stories or otherwise) BUT I see I left off in the middle of a chapter, I think, so I am going to go through my documents and see if I can find the last few bits that are apparently missing. Yes, the stories are in order. If you follow the order of the “tags” from bottom up, you should be good. No, she doesn’t have a name… on purpose. Same reason as she doesn’t really have much of a physical description. Make her yours. Or you! lol
For those that have recently followed (I don’t know where you all came from lol) but HELLO! …enjoy? I HOPE!
I’m off to see if I can gather up the rest of the story….
Thank you again for all the kind messages, that was such a great surprise to come across! <3
leatherch0ked OMFG!!!! You’re back!!! You have NO idea how excited I am!!! Please don’t leave ever again!! I love, love, love your blog & THIS WONDERFUL, SEXY STORY!! I’ve read it all the way through too many times to even count! It’s so amazing & perfect, that I printed it out and took it with me on a week long cruise (no internet access)!! Yes, I’m the one on your Stat counter, that shows some crazy girl in Texas reading your blog everyday for hours & hours! 😜 Thank you SO much for these new chapters!! 😘👏👏👏👏 I’m so happy right now, you have no idea!!!! I know I sound crazy, but I swear I’m not. Just a huge fan of yours! 😉❤️ I’m so glad to know you are ok. Thank you again for coming back and for writing again!
Her fingers reached out, pushing open my coat to fumble with my belt. I let her get as far as lowering my zipper when, for the first time that I could remember, something snapped in my head.
I dropped my hand down and stopped her fingers from moving. Normally, I was all for using someone to relieve some tension, but for once I didn't want her to think...or feel...that I was using her.
I had blown her off, I had been short with her and I avoided her...I didn't deserve her attention. I didn't deserve her caring. I owed her, yet here she was doing anything she could to get me to relax without an ounce of animosity towards me; without demanding an apology from me for how I had been acting. Without any thought to her own feelings.
She looked up at me, confused and I let go of her wrist to smooth the top of her hair, "You don't have to do this"
She moved her head to the side, out of my reach and smiled up at me softly. "I know I don't have to..." She resumed with my zipper, cool fingers scratching at my skin as she reached in to free me, stroking my length slowly, "take a deep breath, let it out slowly and...relax" I bit down on my bottom lip and did what she said, letting my head fall back against the cold brick and closed my eyes, giving in to her, and pushed my guilt about it to the back of my mind. I stopped fighting for the first time in months and let her have complete control.
My body responded to her, just her closeness proving to me, even though I didn't want to admit it, I had missed her. When her lips fit around my cock and that familiar warmth surrounded me, I sighed with content, groaning softly to myself as I felt pieces of my tension melt away. I let my mind go blank for once, and let her take care of me. I shut out every little thing that had been wearing me down, it was just her and me and nothing else.
Her hands slid up along the back of my thighs to tuck underneath my coat and grip the back of my jeans tightly, forcing me body to stay where it was, imprisoning me in her mouth. Her movements were intense and steady. She had her sights on a goal and wasn't going to stop until she reached it. Gently, I felt her teeth drag along my shaft, sending a shudder up my spine and pulling me from my thoughts. I rolled my eyes back open and gripped her hair as I tilted my head down to look at her.
She was lost in the moment, her eyes shut in concentration until, as if she could feel my gaze, they slowly rolled open and lifted to look up at me from beneath her dark lashes. I dropped my free hand to her cheek, running my thumb along the corner of her mouth. Everything was too much, from my own fucked up emotional state, to the selflessness of her actions...to the dirty backdrop and smell of stale beer. One look in to her eyes and I couldn't hold back. I twisted my fingers tighter in her hair and bucked my hips to fuck her mouth slowly, groaning deep in my chest as I emptied myself between her waiting lips.
I let my body go limp back against the brick wall while she got herself together and stood up to face me. She bit down on her lip as she regarded me briefly, "You don't have to do this alone, you know. Stop worrying that you are going to hurt me, I'm tougher than you think" She stopped talking and fixed her eyes on mine, "what are friends for?... besides a quick blow job in an alley way" I stayed silent unsure of what to say and she smiled warmly at me, leaning in to brush her lips quickly across mine, "Jared, take a moment to breath every now and then. If you forget how, you know where to find me"
You're back! Thank you! And finally. Does that mean new fics? Maybe?! :)
LOL....I’m not sure. But, never say never I guess. Every now and then I get the itch to add to the story, but then time gets away from me and I never get to it. We’ll see though! :)
I sat up straighter and cleared my throat, watching an all too familiar woman walk through the door with 2 of her friends.
She was too engrossed in what the girl next to her was saying that she didn't notice anyone in the room, and moved smoothly to an empty stool at the bar. I had mixed feelings seeing her now. It sent a wave of guilt through me that just added to the anxiety already pumping through my veins.
Before I let myself think too long and deep about it, I watched her friend walk away, leaving the spot next to her open. Leaning across the table as I stood up, I told my company that I would be right back and weaved my way to the bar, stepping up next to her silently.
I put my head down and nudged her shoulder gently with mine to get her attention. She turned to look at me, her eyes searching my face. There wasn't an ounce of anger there but I could see the worry in her face when she looked at me.
I smiled faintly, "Long time, no see eh?"
She nodded her head and turned on her stool to get a better look at me. Absentmindedly, I ran my hand over my hair, tucking a wayward strand that had gotten loose from my ponytail, behind my ear.
"You look like shit, Jared" Her eyes flicked down my body and back up to my face, taking in the obvious weight I had lost. I tugged at the beard I hadn't bothered to trim in what felt like weeks and tried to blow it off, making up excuses as usual. I tried to turn the conversation away from me and back onto her, but she wasn't falling for it, she knew what had been going on. She told me as much. "I'm not deaf you know, I've heard the news. It's been all over the industry"
I shrugged my shoulder, belittling what was really going on silently. Trying to pretend that it wasn't really as bad as it sounded...but it was actually worse. Much worse. I looked away from her and bit at my thumbnail. She dipped her head to pull my eyes back to hers, "Are you ok? For real now...no bullshit"
I dropped my hand from my mouth and leaned my hip against the bar, shoving my hands into my pockets as I faced her. "In all honestly, no, I'm not. Not right now anyway"
A bar wasn't really the place I wanted to get into a deep conversation about a subject I was there trying to escape from, but it was obvious that she wasn't going to take some half-assed answer from me. I stripped it down and gave her the shortened version of what was going on as she sat and watched me while I talked, concern creasing her forehead the more I talked. When I finished, we stood in silence.
Her friend had come back and reached between us for the bottle of beer she had left on the bar before moving to the other side of me, waiting for her spot to be free again.
I watched her sling the strap of her purse over her shoulder and stand up, "Come with me a second, I want to talk to you in private"
I looked over my shoulder, back to my own table, as she stood and moved to the door. They were still deep in conversation; my absence wouldn't even be noticed. I followed her outside and around to the side of the building, stopping when she did by the empty dumpsters along the brick wall.
With no warning she turned to face me, gripping my coat in her fists to turn my body until I backed up between the metal bins. With my back firmly pushed up against the wall, she let her purse fall and sank to her knees without another word to me.
I watched the top of her head as she settled down in front of me, on the dirty ground of the bar parking lot, surrounded by empty beer bottles and tossed out band flyers...somewhere in the distance an ambulance siren cut through the cool night air.
I haven’t been on this blog in SO long, and apparently message notifications have not been working...for a really, really long fucking time. There are so many!! :3
To those that have asked, yes, I am ok. I’m great in fact. No, I don’t have anything new (stories or otherwise) BUT I see I left off in the middle of a chapter, I think, so I am going to go through my documents and see if I can find the last few bits that are apparently missing. Yes, the stories are in order. If you follow the order of the “tags” from bottom up, you should be good. No, she doesn’t have a name... on purpose. Same reason as she doesn’t really have much of a physical description. Make her yours. Or you! lol
For those that have recently followed (I don’t know where you all came from lol) but HELLO! ...enjoy? I HOPE!
I’m off to see if I can gather up the rest of the story....
Thank you again for all the kind messages, that was such a great surprise to come across! <3
What would normally be exactly what I wanted, I found myself angry at her for not arguing. For not fighting for me. It was just another thing to add to my growing mountain of bullshit I was trying to cope with.
In the logical side of my brain, I knew I had never given her a reason to think that I had actually come to depend on her and now, when I wanted her to convince me that staying away from each other was a bad idea, she did what I had originally liked most about her...she just shrugged and went about her business without a word, without even asking me why.
That was my fault also. I never "talked" to her about things. It was sex. When the sex was over, we parted ways. But what she didn't know, and what I had hidden away deep down inside of myself, was that she was the only one who ever made me feel like I mattered more than just the person the public knew; the on-stage character I had become.
She wasn't interested in any of it. She liked me...for me. And, I trusted her. I knew if I needed to vent, she would sit and listen to me and not judge me...and maybe even offer some much needed relaxation, but after all this time I never really came to her about my personal problems. I was too stuck on the thought that if I started to share with her, it would make us this "couple" I didn't want to be; what I assumed she didn't want to be either. All I could hope was that when I was finally ready to swallow my pride, it wouldn't be too late.
To avoid the explosion that was building inside of me, threatening to blow, I suggested to the few people littered around my living room, that we go out for a little bit. Get out of the house, get some fresh air...stop thinking for a minute.
We had been sitting in silence for what felt like hours, each deep in our own thoughts. The cloud that loomed over our heads was suffocating each of us and it was obvious on the faces around me. I could see it in myself as well. I looked defeated. We all did.
We loaded up my truck and I headed towards a local spot that was never crawling with too many people; the kind of people I had no patience to deal with tonight. When we walked inside, it was dark and uncrowded...perfect. I led the way to an empty booth towards the back, out of view and slid onto the leather bench seat, unbuttoning my coat as I sat. I pulled my scarf loose from my neck and asked the server that stood over us for just a water.
Even with new surroundings, the conversation quickly turned back to what we had been talking about for months now. How the fuck were we going to get out of this mess with our heads still attached. I couldn't talk about it anymore. I needed a fucking break. I tuned them out and searched over the crowd without really looking. I just wanted to separate myself from the table.
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