I fear the future

This place contains things people may find upsetting like: torture, cannibalism, con-con, and problematic stuff in general They/Them or die PT/ENG Gotta get my ivantill obsession out so that's all I'm drawing for who knows how long Save me, Alien Stage hyperfixation! Alien Stage hyperfixation, save me!

[leo-a-nb]

Just a really ugly consept sketch

No escape au because that's my new obsession ig

Lol i just noticed i forgot to sketch the other pant leg 💀

[leo-a-nb]

Woundfucking 🤤🤤

[leo-a-nb]

I wanna kill myself but I'm too lazy to do it so fuck it. I have a cat to take care of anyway

[leo-a-nb]

I love cannibalism so much i should Come up with a cannibalism au for ivtiiv

I should start drawing more extreme stuff like nothing is stopping me

[hallucivanya]

My old blog @hallucivan got termed. If we were mutuals, dw I still follow you! You're the one not following me lol. My main is @girlprince-extraordinaire

Call me Kurov. Minors/Ageless will be blocked

Art on pixiv & baraag under username karasuban

[hallucivanya]

Mutuals I would appreciate if you could reblog this because I do not remember everyone by name T^T (No pressure though!)

[leo-a-nb]

Everytime I listen to Mirror and the "i taste the dark behind your eyes" part comes this is what I visualise

[leo-a-nb]

I feel like my therapist doesn't understand that I don't wanna go to college

[leo-a-nb]

I remembered i don't give a fuck about what people think so here are my ugly trad sketches over 6 months lol

You have to trust me on this one this was supposed to be fem ivan lol

Storyboard for the comic i made

Studies also for the comic lol

And werewolf Till getting railed but i got too lazy to draw ivan

I just know I'll regret posting this

[leo-a-nb]

When you have that follower that doesn't interact with you at all

Like am i not good enough for you???? Why do you follow me????? What made you follow me???? Why are you here??? Even better: Why aren't you here?? Wtf????

[leo-a-nb]

Yo! I have a question bc I always wonder: who do you find the easiest/hardest to draw out of the main cast?? - @coquette-maul

HELLOOO!!!

Hm I don't know. I haven't drawn Luka and Hyuna so logically they'd be the hardest ones to draw lol

Plus my difficulty lays more on certain body parts rather than a whole

But between the 4 i draw id say

Hardest: I'd day either Ivan or Till, mostly because their hair gives me headaches and I'm still not used to Drawing men even after almost 2 year's of mostly drawing men

Easiest: Sua! Her hair is so easy to draw and i just find everything about her really easy to draw

[leo-a-nb]

hi leo!! regarding your no escape au, was there something that happened to ivan to make him develop into the person he is? or is he just Like That

HELLOO!!!

I'm sorry this took so long i was about to go to sleep but i had to write this so I'm sorry if this isn't very coherent

He has always just kinda like this. But it could've been prevented from getting this bad.

Ivan's home life was extremely dysfunctional, his father (Unsha) was Abusive (towards him and his mother) and his mother (his wife i forget if she ever had a name) had an incestuous attachment to him. They were poor and lived in a neighborhood where people appeared dead almost everyday, no one cared and the police did basically nothing.

Unsha was a killer himself and he forced 8/9yo Ivan to learn and watch, the same way he now does with Till. At first he had the normal reactions like vomiting, crying and refusing to partake in murder, but through punishments and "positive reinforcement" Ivan learned that the best he could do was follow Unsha's orders.

One night, Unsha was passed out drunk and Ivan's mother convinced him to kill Unsha. "It will be better once he's gone, baby! It'll be just you and me... Just us! Kill him and we'll be free!" She said. And Ivan, little 11yo Ivan, believed her and did what she told him to do.

After, Ivan started to feel a sort of hollowness he couldn't name, nor had time to try and process it because; "you're the man of this house now, Ivan. You're my man now. My beautiful man." She'd say. She started raping him.

Years went by where Ivan felt power against his mother until one day, not loong after his 16th birthday, she called him her "husband" and he snapped. He killed her, beheaded her and speared her head on the fence.

After he killed her, he felt the hollow go away. But then it came back. So he figured that killing equals not feeling hollow.

----

Now, I'm gonna be honest. At first i didn't wanna write him to be a victim, i wanted him to be evil for the sake of it but i figured it'd be boring lol.

Thank you for the ask i love you 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

[leo-a-nb]

Hihi!!

What's your No escape au about? I watched alien stage yesterday (or the day before) and now I am consuming all content. (I'm also intrigued by the Till torture you made art of).🫶🫶🫶🫶

HELLOO!!!!!!

Oof there's a lot that comes to it. In THIS post theres basically the outline of the whole au (recommend you to go to the comments because i added info there) plus other posts in the no escape au tag.

But summarizing it:

Till was a stalker that ended up stalking the wrong guy (ivan) and breaking into his House just to become Ivan's prisoner and plaything. Ivan is a crazy guy who practices extreme torture on people and forces Till to do the same. Depending on how Till acts during the torture Ivan will either reward him with intimacy and love or punish him by torturing him (in less lethal ways because he doesn't want yo lose his little toy just yet). But even in the domestic moments Ivan still will be aggressive just to keep Till on edge.

Also a lot of vomit

Thank you for the ask i love you 🖤🖤🖤🖤

[leo-a-nb]

The same way i love making my blorbos stuffer in my hands i also love making them have happy lives because goddamit if i can be happy on my own might as well be happy by being delusional and fantase about ivantill being happy.

Omg healthy coping mechanisms?! Me??? Having healthy coping mechanisms????? Holy shit!!!!

[leo-a-nb]

I wish my ideas were interesting enough for people to ask questions about

[leo-a-nb]

Sometimes I'm like "hm i wish i had art that i didn't post so i could do one of those old art Posts" but then i remember the humble trad art and i lose all willingness to post old stuff lol

[leo-a-nb]

Everytime i see my cat i just wanna kill it like stop being so cute i can't handle it i love you too much you need to die

[leo-a-nb]

School ended it's final exams time babyyyy (intense internal suffering)

i have no energy to draw but i really wanna draw and i really wanna elaborate on No Eacape au but i can't think i just know that i wanna incorporate vomit and drugs into it.... Vomiting because of drugs... Till vomiting because of drugs....