Not that anyone really cares, but for the 3 of you that do, I feel like it's important to keep you all informed of things going on.
I am getting ready to travel for work and I will be 1) super busy, 2) away from internet access for awhile. Not too long, but long enough to be noticeable (even more noticeable than my lapses).
I have 2 WIP from requests that were sent in awhile ago, and I have a few more requests currently in my inbox. I will TRY to knock out at least the two WIP, but I make no promises.
As of right now, requests are CLOSED. The requests that are currently in my inbox will still stand valid. I will not delete them. But they will be on hold for some time.
Thank you for understanding, thank you for sticking around, and I will get back to you all once I can.
Holy shit I'm so glad you're back! Girl your Bucky Barnes soulmate AU is *chefs kiss* ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Is there gonna be a part 2 to it? Are they gonna actually have the chance to be together?! It doesn't ~NEED~ a part 2, but I'm such a slut for Barky Barnes and soulmate AUs. So I'll read anything!
Anywayzzz I'm glad you're back, Ziskayt זיסקייט!
Lmao "Barky Barnes". I'm gonna assume that was a typo and not you trying to tell me you want an AU of Bucky being a dog. But thanks, babes 😘
I don't plan on making a part 2 to this, but I have more soulmate AUs planned for the future. Some for Bucky, some for other characters. Don't know when I plan on publishing them, but they're in the drafts.
I promise to supply you with more Bucky content in the future!
hiiiiii do you still take requests? if so can i please get a a soft!bucky fic?? maybe you comfort him after he has a relapse or something? i just really want to give bucky a hug. thankies!!!!
Holy shit I'm so glad you're back! Girl your Bucky Barnes soulmate AU is *chefs kiss* ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Is there gonna be a part 2 to it? Are they gonna actually have the chance to be together?! It doesn't ~NEED~ a part 2, but I'm such a slut for Barky Barnes and soulmate AUs. So I'll read anything!
Anywayzzz I'm glad you're back, Ziskayt זיסקייט!
Lmao "Barky Barnes". I'm gonna assume that was a typo and not you trying to tell me you want an AU of Bucky being a dog. But thanks, babes 😘
I don't plan on making a part 2 to this, but I have more soulmate AUs planned for the future. Some for Bucky, some for other characters. Don't know when I plan on publishing them, but they're in the drafts.
I promise to supply you with more Bucky content in the future!
Relationship(s): Bucky Barnes/Original Female Character
Words: 5,677
Warnings: None
Summary: Sort of a soulmate-AU in which soulmates dream of each other before meeting. Bucky is convinced she's not real, but dreams of her anyway no matter how many times Hydra tries to wipe her from his mind.
Bucky's first memory of her feels like forever ago. He can't remember how old he was exactly, he just knows he had been going through puberty because it was then he started liking girls. There was one girl he went to school with who he thought was really pretty. And after puberty, he started dating. He had asked this girl out and she happily said yes. Of course, being the age that they were, there wasn't much they could actually do. He had taken her to a nearby fair and they had a good time. He remembers being limited on money so he resorted to sneaking and charming his way into some free food and games. This may or may not have gotten him into some trouble, but either way the night ended with a blast and he was already promising this girl a second date.
He walked her home like the young gentleman he was. Then he made his way back to his home. It was late. Only his mother had stayed awake, waiting for his arrival -his father already fast asleep for an early morning job. Once Bucky was safe and sound at home, the family had bid a goodnight and Bucky was off to bed. Then he had his first dream of her.
She was another pretty girl. Around his age. A perfect match to his energy. In his dream, the two of them had snuck and charmed their way through town as they found numerous ways of entertaining themselves. In his dream, they seemed to be the perfect pair. Just two kids being kids, never having to guess what the other was thinking. They finished each other's sentences, understood each other's jokes, had a love for the same things.
Bucky woke the next morning still thinking about her. A smile had been on his face for most of the day, and everyone questioned what had him so happy. He never figured out what to respond with, so he always just said 'it's nothing'. At first, he didn't assume much from the dream. He had heard the wives tale of soulmates dreaming of each other, seeing the world through each other's eyes and watching them live their life until they were destined to meet, but this wasn't the first time he's dreamed of someone. He can count on both hands the amount of times an unknown person appeared in his dream. And he hadn't dreamed of that girl after that either. So he completely forgot about it and carried on with life, until he dreamed of her again for the first time in years.
He remembered her face. She looked the exact same, only a few years older. Bucky was eighteen this time. He knows that because he had graduated high school and was getting ready for college. He dreamed of her as she also took the next step in life. Women back then had the opportunity to achieve higher education, and many women took that opportunity having received a degree and entering the work force, but it was not as common an occurrence. Women more often than not were housewives. Instead of going to college, they married and had children. But she was one of few that put off that natural cycle of motherhood. He dreamed of her in his class, taking the same tests as him, having the same friends as him. He dreamed of her studying hard after class, working twice as hard to get the same grades as her male classmates because women were not taken seriously. He offered to help her study, telling her that he knew she was where she belonged and he wanted to help her get the respect she deserved. Hey, Bucky Barnes was nothing if not progressive.
When he awoke from his dream, something inside him had snapped. He began to wonder if that wives tale had any truth to it. Many people believed in the myth, claiming they dreamed of their husband or wife for years before meeting. Yet, at the same time, many claimed that they married a person they never dreamed about but still loved with their entire being. Bucky's parents hadn't dreamed of each other before marrying, and Steve's parents hadn't either, but he's heard the stories of his other friends claiming their parents had dreamed of each other and married the moment they met. Was Bucky one of the lucky ones to know of his soulmate before meeting her? He spent many weeks from then on looking for her face in his college crowd. He looked for her in all of his classes. He looked for her as he walked to and from the school. He looked for her in his neighborhood, wondering if she lived close by. But he never found her. He didn't even know her name to ask if anyone had heard of her. She was just a ghost, a figment of his imagination, and it drove him crazy not knowing if she even existed. He was dreaming of a woman he didn't know, yet he wanted desperately to know her.
Many more years pass until he dreams of her again. The world is in turmoil now as America is thrown into another war. Pearl Harbor had been bombed, and men from all over the country had been involuntarily selected to join the fight. Bucky being one of them. Fear ate away at him as he was prepped for war to the best of the Army's ability. He tests high on the AGCT, earning him a Grade I achievement and a Sergeant Officer title. He is assigned to the 107th Infantry and immediately thrown on the battlefield. He sees more death in the trenches than he ever thought possible. It's hell on Earth as the men beside him drop like flies. He grows tired and weary as he goes days without sleep, fear eating at him and keeping his adrenaline up so high that it's impossible to sleep. But he eventually manages. His body is so exhausted that he physically can't stay awake any longer. The officers switch out and Bucky finally falls asleep. His first dream is of her.
She is just as tired and weary as him as she works tirelessly in a factory, making bullets for the military. She works long hours, from sun up 'til sun down. Bags had formed under her eyes and her cheeks grow hollow, but she works diligently still. She packs each bullet with love and a wish for the soldier using it to come home. She tells him to come home. His name is hard to hear when she says it. It sounds mumbled, like she says it underwater. He's not sure if it's because he's just imagining her saying it, or if it's because she's not actually real and all of this is pretend. But he doesn't question it. He wants to know that someone is praying for him. He wants to know that someone would miss him if he were to die. It's what keeps him going.
And when he wakes, he feels refreshed and rejuvenated for another battle. He fights hard to win, to return home, to find her. He has hope that the enemy will surrender, and everyone can return to their loved ones.
But then he gets captured. The German forces take him as a POW, and he is used as an experiment for the science division -Hydra. But he still holds out hope that this isn't the end. He still holds out hope that he will be found. No matter how many times they beat him, no matter how many times they inject him with unknown substances, no matter how many times they electrocute him, he hopes and he prays. He thinks of her every single time to keep him distracted from the pain. He compartmentalizes himself to hide. It's there he imagines her and what would happen when he comes home..... If he comes home.
He imagines finding her waiting for him. The Army finds him and takes him home. She is the first person he sees once he has been treated for his injuries. She is standing outside the hospital, bouncing on her toes and shaking with anticipation when he walks through the doors. She runs to him and throws herself in his arms. And they kiss for the first time. She takes him home like the hero he is. They marry, have children, their children have children. They grow old together, happy and carefree. It's the perfect life.
But then they take him back and they zap him again. They inject him with more stuff. The pain gets more intense. And her image slowly starts to fade from his memory. But he fights hard to keep her there.
She's waiting for him to come home. She's outside the hospital, eager to see him walk out. They kiss when they see each other. Shortly after, they get married. They have kids. Many kids.
And then he's zapped again.
She's waiting for him. She's outside the hospital -no, she's outside the Army base. They kiss. They marry. They have a kid.
Zap.
She's waiting. She's the one that finds him. They kiss.
Zap.
She's waiting. Blurry and unrecognizable.
Zap.
He sees an empty building. No one inside. He walks out. No one outside. He is alone. There is an emptiness in his chest as he looks around and sees no one. He feels like something is missing, but can't place his finger on it. It hurts.
Hydra becomes his new family. He is their pet, obediently doing everything they say. They train him in the art of death. He learns how to kill with his new toy -a metal limb replacing what was his arm. They teach him how to be a weapon, working exactly how they intended. Once his training is complete, they tell him he will be stored away until needed. And he's put into some sort of chamber, sealed off from everything and everyone, and then it grows cold. Ice instantly forms inside this tube. His blood freezes in a snap. His body becomes stiff. And he falls asleep.
In his sleep, a mysterious woman approaches him. She walks oddly, almost like she just teleports to him instead of taking steps. Her movements are jittery and erratic. Her face twists and morphs like an electrical shock. But it's clear as day what her intent is when a jittery hand reaches up to touch the outside of his chamber. She places it gently against the glass. Her static-y face looks up at him and a sense of longing fills his bones. The chill of the chamber is nothing compared to the chill of desperation as he somehow finds the strength to reach up and place his hand against hers on the other side. He looks down to see that it's the metal hand. His gut churns. He looks back up to her just in time to see a tear roll down her cheek.
"Bucky." she says. It's garbled and stuttered. Like when the radio glitches out just before dying.
Her voice sounds both foreign, but familiar. He can't place where he's heard it before. It's on the tip of his tongue, but nothing comes to mind. He knows her. He knows he does. But he can't think of a name or a place. He tries, though. His brain kicks into overdrive as he scans through every thought he has. She called him Bucky. Was that his name? It had to be. Where was he from? A place comes to mind: New York. That must be where he is from. Did he know her there? Was she a neighbor perhaps? No, that doesn't sit right with him. Family? No, not that either.
Before his train of thought could come to a complete stop, she fades from his view. She disappears in a cloudy mirage. And then the cold follows suit. The glass of his chamber lifts, and in the place where she stood is a group of men with weapons drawn at the ready. The barrels of the guns are pointed directly at his head.
One man stands in the center of the group, making direct eye contact with him. As he falls to the ground on his knees, slowly regaining control of his still-icy limbs, the unknown man speaks.
"Soldat." the man says, and the word sounds foreign in his ears. But a painful shock zaps his brain, and a response forms in his mind, quickly traveling to his tongue.
"Ya gotov otvechat." he responds with. He doesn't know what it means, but he says it anyway. The answer satisfies the man.
The man approaches, getting to his eye level from the ground, and tells him of an assignment. He is told he needs to kill a diplomat. An enemy diplomat. That Hydra -his owners and handlers- are shaping the world. He is told that he will be prepped for the mission and be sent on his way later on.
"Where is she?" he finds himself asking as he looks around to the men still aiming their weapons at him. All men. Not a single woman. Not her.
"Who?" the man questions with concern.
"The woman. She called me Bucky. I know her." he says, and he finds out just too late that it was the wrong thing to say.
They take him back to the chair. The chair he remembers clearly, and his body goes into fight or flight mode, but he is wrestled into the contraption and forced to endure the torturous zaps to his brain. The memory of this woman is gone once more. All he knows is his mission, which he completes to his handler's satisfaction, and then he is once again back in the icy chamber. The world grows dark as he falls into a cold sleep.
He doesn't know how much time passes while he sleeps. Is it a day? Several days? Months? Years? He doesn't know. He is left alone in complete darkness. Darkness and silence. It drives him to insanity being alone, not knowing if he was dead or alive, but well aware that he does, in fact, exist.
In the dark void, he imagines someone. A stranger. A friend. Just someone to keep him company as time passes by at an unknown pace. She's beautiful. A beautiful, kind, and caring soul that makes him feel less alone. She smiles at him constantly, bringing him a comfort he hadn't felt in awhile. Her touch is soft when she reaches out to him. She takes his hands in hers -both flesh and metal- and guides him through the darkness until a light opens up and he is transported somewhere familiar. Somewhere safe.
She wraps herself in his embrace and places a sweet kiss against his lips. He's filled with warmth. It reaches out to her, enveloping them both in a blanket of peace.
"Marry me, Bucky." she says to him in a sweet lilt. It's a stark contrast to the rough, grating voices of the men he answers to. It brings a smile to his face hearing it.
He can't help but be enamored with her. He wants to marry her. He wants to spend the rest of his life with her. He wants to stay in this moment of happiness forever. But he's once again ripped away from her as she melts into a puddle of nothingness, and her figure is replaced by the group of armed men.
"Soldat." he hears one of them say.
"Ya gotov otvechat." he responds with.
It's automatic the way he behaves. Instantly obeying commands despite being filled with dread as he does so. Like he has no control over his own body. He's a puppet being pulled by strings he can't see. But something inside him knows better than to try and fight it. It's a voice inside his head that sounds familiar. It's feminine. 'Just do what they say' it tells him. And an image of a woman flashes before his eyes, before quickly disappearing.
He knows her.
He remembers her.
The men send him on a mission. The world around him feels strangely different, but he doesn't know why. As he studies the layout of the land, he feels like a stranger in a strange land. But he does his best to carry out his mission like he's designed to do. All the while, images of the woman keep popping up in his mind.
He knows her.
His mission is a success. A world leader is assassinated, the country is plunged into turmoil, and Hydra swoops in to clean up. They establish a stronghold in the area, spreading Hydra's influence. He is told he did a job well done when he is taken back to headquarters. His handlers reward him. Well, he guesses it's a reward. They give him some time to just exist before they put him back in the chamber. But he takes it as a reward anyway. He sits off by himself, watching the agents around him. He studies every single one of their faces. Why? He doesn't know. He just has the urge to look. There's a thought inside his head telling him he needs to find a specific person, but he doesn't know who.
Once again, he is put into the chamber, and he is again forced into an icy world of blackness. But she's still there. She's waiting for him, bouncing on her toes and eager to see him. Once he sets his eyes on her, she runs to him and throws herself into his embrace. She kisses him deeply with a wide smile on her face.
"Welcome home!" she tells him when she pulls back. He can't help but smile back at her. With her, he feels..... happy.
Time with her is an illusion. He doesn't even know how long he has with her before she disappears again, so he learns to cherish every moment they have together. He doesn't know how he remembers her, or why she keeps showing up, but she's the only thing he longs to see. This woman fills him with a sense of hope that there is still good in the world. He has hope that one day he will be free from the torture of Hydra. Her presence is a promise that she will be there for him when that time comes.
When he is ripped away from her, the first thing he does is search for her in the crowd of Hydra agents. He's wild as he desperately pushes past his handlers in search of her. But his actions cause a stir of panic among everyone as they rush to subdue him. He is chained and held down like a rabid animal. Still, he looks for her. Then they drag him back to the chair and strap him in. Even still, he looks for her. He wants her. He needs to see her. But she's not there. And then he's zapped, and he forgets her for the time being.
When he sees her again in his imagination, he comes to the conclusion that this is all she is -a part of him that has hidden away and only comes out to comfort him. He has convinced himself that she's not real. He hasn't seen her out there in the real world. She is not one of his handlers, she is not one of his targets, she is not a passerby on the street as he blends in with the locals during his stakeouts. She is nothing more than a ruse confined to his dreams.
But he dreams of her nonetheless. He dreams of a life with her. He dreams of a house with a white picket fence and a yard full of kids. There is no worry here, no pain, no despair. Here, he is normal with a normal arm and a normal brain. He no longer falls to his knees in submission when he is given an order. He's finally happy.
It's a cycle he comes to memorize: he wakes from his frozen world to a group of armed men, is given a mission, carries it out, wiped from it all when it's said and done, put back into his chamber, and then meets her again. He loses track of how many times it happens. All he knows is that each time he wakes, many years have passed since the last, and the only thing he ever looks forward to is the completion of his mission so he can return to his sleep and dream of her. His girl.
Hydra tries their best to wipe her from his memory. They zap him over and over again every time he shows so much as an ounce of humanity. If he looks too hard in the crowd for her, they put him in the chair. If he mentions the name 'Bucky' that she calls him, they zap him harder. If he asks about a woman, they beat him. So he's learned to keep it to himself. He keeps her locked away to keep both her and him safe. Hydra can't wipe her from him if they don't know he still remembers her.
He has built a life with her in his dreams over the years. The children that they had all grew up. Their first born is now married with a child on the way, their youngest is starting college, and the two of them sold their empty nest and downgraded to a little cabin perfect for just the two of them. They spend all their free time traveling the world, making memories in new languages, sharing their life story with anyone willing to hear.
At this point, they've grown old. They sport grey hairs atop their head, a few extra wrinkles on their face, slower in their movements as their weary bones require rest. But she is still the most beautiful woman he's ever seen. She still fills him with a warmth that comforts him. With her, it's like nothing else matters. It's the perfect life.
Just as he kisses her goodnight, he is once again robbed and brought to the real world.
The agents around him have come and gone over the years, but he still knows that they have the upper hand. His main superior -Alexander Pierce, he remembers- has aged quite a bit, letting him know that yet another several years have gone by.
"Status report." Pierce orders.
"Ya gotov otvechat." he replies.
"We've got another mission for you. It'll shape the world as we know it. Project Insight." he is told and he knows what he needs to do.
His prep is quick. He is given all as-needed information that pertains to Project Insight. He is given a team to work with, told what his role is, and what the desired outcome will be. He is told when he will depart and who his targets are once he gets there.
He prepares himself on the journey. It's New York. The place sounds familiar to him, but he has no time to think on it because they arrive and he begins his work. Project Insight will be overtaken from the inside out. Eliminate the leaders and gain control of security. He is tasked with the first part. He knows a name and a face: Nick Fury. He is the first target. Eliminate him.
He acts on impulse. His body moves as it is designed to do. It kills. It causes damage. It leaves a trail of destruction in its wake. He is nothing more than a machine with his buttons being pushed by others. His mind tells him that he is just as much a victim as the civilians around him, but deep down he knows that is not true. A victim doesn't harm others like this.
The innocent people on the road are the victims as he and his team engage in a reckless high-speed chase against Nick Fury. The people in the buildings around them that are impacted by exploding vehicles are the victims. Even Nick Fury is a victim as he fires a rocket at the man's car and sends it flying across the freeway, trapping him inside the vehicle. Part of him is thankful that Nick Fury hadn't died from the crash. He is relieved when he checks the pile of burning metal and finds it empty. But he knows that letting the man live will only cause harm to him. His mission is not complete.
He is sent to follow Nick Fury's trail. First to an apartment, and then to a hospital to end it once and for all. Later, when the Hydra agents on the inside are ready to take over Project Insight for good, he is sent to finish his job. Only one stands in his way: Captain America. He is the enemy's strongest contender. It's SHIELD, he remembers. SHIELD made Captain America their golden boy. As long as Captain America lives, Hydra will never have complete control.
He ambushes the man on the highway. His team crashes the car the man tries to escape in. From there, a gun fight breaks out. Innocent civilians are caught in the cross fire yet again. Many try to flee, but some don't make it. He feels dread seep into his bones at seeing the bodies just fall to the ground, but he has no choice but to ignore them and keep eyes on his target.
He fires a rocket at Captain America, who dodges it effortlessly, and the rocket explodes into a bus behind him. People inside rush to escape it before being burned alive. Captain America's body isn't seen, making him think the man is somewhere buried beneath the destruction. He can't mark his mission as complete until he has confirmation that the man is dead, so he closes in, weapons drawn at the ready, and approaches the bus as more escape. A woman crawls through a broken window, crying out as she gets cut up from the glass.
Once there, he pushes through the broken metal pieces, looking for a blond body. So far, all he sees is fire, glass, burnt belongings, blood, and the woman crawling across the pavement. Leave no witnesses. He gets up and scrambles toward her before she can get away. She senses his movement and looks back at him in fear. He hears her cry out and watches as her face contorts with despair.
He feels something tug at his heart strings as he watches her seemingly give up the closer he gets. She practically lays there and accepts defeat once he gets right on top of her. He knows what he's doing is wrong. He knows how he looks to others. He knows he is the machine of terror. But he can't stop. He can't will his body to back away and leave her be. He must finish the job. At the very least, he tells himself it's better to put her out of her misery, but it's not something that comforts him because he knows she wouldn't be in pain like this if it weren't for him.
He gets over top of her, dropping to his knees to keep her trapped to the hot pavement. He rolls her over and gets a good look at her for the first time. The first thing he sees is her face covered in cuts and blood. It stains her skin red, only broken up by streaks of her tears as she cries. Once more, his heart constricts on itself. There's a pain in his chest, telling him to not do it. Just walk away. You can do it.
The weapon in his metal hand is drawn, ready to fire. Her eyes glance over to it real quick before looking back to him. She doesn't fight him. Doesn't try to shield herself. She just lays there beneath him and accepts her fate. But, with a choked out sob, she speaks.
"Bucky.... please...."
Bucky..... He knows that name. He's heard it before. Somewhere, deep in his mind, he can picture the last time he heard it. He knows her voice too. It rings a bell somewhere in his mind too. Electric shocks zap his brain, forcing his eyes to shut in pain. The pain of the chair is on the forefront of his mind. They zap him every time he remembers. He's not allowed to remember. He's not allowed to remember her, because he's not allowed to be human. He's a machine. He's a weapon. But there's that one part of him he's kept hidden away that screams out to him. The one part of him he's saved just for her. It's the part of him that has built a life inside his mind. He remembers the woman in his dreams, calling out his name with a smile just before she kisses him.
She's waiting for him, outside the hospital he's being treated in for his war injuries. She's bouncing on her toes, eager to see him. When he meets her at the door, she is quick to run into his embrace and press a sweet kiss to his lips. They go home together to build their life. They marry, have kids, then grandkids.
"Bucky?" he hears her voice again.
He looks down at the woman still bleeding. She's watching him intently. Something inside him breaks down. The part of him that he's had hidden away finally comes forth. For the first time, he moves of his own will. His free hand reaches down to touch her, softly, carefully, and wipes away the blood on her cheeks. At first, she flinches at his touch, but allows him to swipe his fingers over her skin when she realizes he isn't harming her.
Her skin is soft beneath his fingers. His flesh fingers can feel her body heat scorching from the adrenaline. With her face cleaned as best as he can get it, it finally clicks. The woman. His dreams.
"I know you." he murmurs out. "You were in my dreams...... I remember."
He can see her visibly relax. More tears trickle out from her eyes, but this time they are accompanied not by screams but by a choked laugh. She nods at him hopefully. She attempts to smile up at him, but the smile is mixed with pain.
"Yes! Yes, it's me!" she cries. "Please, Bucky, don't do this."
"I.... I can't..... I don't know how to stop." he admits in despair, because he knows it's true. He has no control over himself anymore. He belongs to Hydra.
"I can help you. I promise." she rushes out. It almost sounds like she's just trying to convince him to let her up. After all, who wouldn't say whatever they could in order to get out of a situation like this? But..... he believed her.
He slowly gets off of her and holds a hand out to her. She is hesitant to take his hand. She looks at it for a moment, and he can see the gears in her head turning. But eventually she gives in. Her small, bloody hand sends a spark of electricity through him. This time, it's a good spark. It feels good. He pulls her to her feet and she wobbles against him. A pained cry erupts from her lips and he is reminded that she is injured. Injured because of him. He injured his soulmate.
"You need help. You have to leave." he tells her.
"Then come with me." she says.
He is about to answer her, telling her he can't because he is property of Hydra, but before he can say a single word there are more explosions around them. He covers her with his body, shielding her from the flying debris. Around them, the fire fight rages on. Captain America and his team are fighting the Hydra agents. Bombs, bullets, and rockets go flying around them. The bus then finally explodes into a million pieces and he can feel the heat burning through his clothes. He hears her cry once more as the heat burns her skin.
She can't stay here. It's too dangerous. Hydra will kill her.
He hoists her to her feet again and drags her out of harms way. He puts her behind cover and reluctantly lets her go.
"Go." he orders. She is confused.
"Come with me!" she repeats.
"I can't. They won't let me."
"Bucky......"
"Go!" he says more forcefully. Another bomb goes off and she has no choice but to back away.
A final look exchanged between them and she runs off, disappearing from him for the millionth time. It hurts more this time, because this time it's not his imagination. She's been ripped away from him for real. And when Hydra pulls back from the fight, taking him with them, he knows this will be the last time he ever sees her in real life ever again.
They put him back in the chair, and they wipe him once more, and her memory is once again gone.
Girl! Where have you been?!!!!! I've missed the shit outta you! Why'd you leave me like my dad when he went to go get milk?
But unlike your dad, I came back lmao.
Just life, man. Life in general got in the way. It's been hectic the last few months especially, and the next several months will be just as bad, if not worse. Finding time to pop out fics is becoming more difficult.
Are you ever gonna post that topgun fic you teased us about? I don't like foreplay.
I'm slowly but surely working on it. The fic was already going to be a massive, multi-chspter, slow burn fic anyway. So it was already going to take a long time to complete. But life also gets in the way.
It'll come around eventually. When specifically? I don't know, my dude. Lol it'll be published when it gets published.
Relationship(s): Lt. Jake "Hangman" Seresin/Original Female Character
Words: 5,126
Warnings: NSFW (lil bit of a breeding kink if you squint)
Summary: Just some musings between a domestic Jake and his girlfriend because I am a SLUT for domestic Jake. I am currently writing an actual full-fledged TOPGUN fic, and this is inspired by a moment within it. This stand-alone is NOT at all connected to the full fic. It is simply an idea that has been inside my head and I couldn't wait any longer to share it. It needs to be exorcised from my brain or else I'm gonna go crazy.
Jake had found his girlfriend in quite low spirits lately. For the past couple of days, she had just been a little down. He had asked her about it, but all she said was she wasn't feeling good. Maybe she was sick: she was sleeping a bit more than usual, and she complained about muscle cramps a lot. He didn't know. But he tried to make her feel better. He cooked her a light breakfast in the mornings, drew her bubble baths at night before bed, stocked up on medicine that she may or may not need. He even bought her that matching kitchenware set that she had been eyeing online recently but never actually bought because there was no need to replace the perfectly good set they currently had.
Nothing seemed to raise her spirits despite her best effort at pretending it did. She gave her smiles, gave Jake her kisses, went with him to his weekly family dinners, but he saw right through it. The way she'd turn in for the night at earlier and earlier times, and the way she'd skip meals....... It was all pretend. It was all a show.
"Talk to me, darlin'." he softly begged to her one night. They sat on the couch watching tv like usual, but she just seemed to be closed off from him -not really acknowledging his presence or accepting his affection. It wasn't like her.
"Talk about what?" she responded to him just as softly.
"About what's on your mind. You haven't been acting like yourself lately and it's got me worried."
"I'm fine, Jake. I promise. Just a little under the weather is all." she tried to tell him, even giving a light smile to assure him she was okay. He didn't believe her.
"You've been under the weather for awhile now. If you're sick, then maybe it's about time to go see a doctor. Or if it's something else, then we should talk it out and make it better."
"There's nothing to talk about, Jake. I swear, I'm alright. It'll pass, I promise." she reiterated in that same soft tone as before.
"I don't believe you." he told her. "But I respect you enough to drop it. As long as you promise me you'll talk to me if it doesn't pass." he held her gaze, unwilling to leave it be until she promised him. With a sigh, she nodded and agreed to his terms. True to his word, he dropped the topic and they went back to watching tv for awhile longer before turning in for the night.
Three more days pass and she's still down in the dumps. Jake was really starting to get worried. He was never one to be a hypochondriac, but he couldn't help but think that there was something deeper going on than just feeling a little blue. He took to the internet to look up possible causes for her change in behavior, and the internet informed him of a bunch of different illnesses and conditions that often go undiagnosed because their symptoms are pretty vague. Like constant fatigue, change in attitude......
"Whatcha lookin' at?" she asked over his shoulder and he slammed his laptop lid closed.
"Nothin', darlin'. Just doing some work stuff." he tried to brush her off. Her eyes told him she didn't believe a word coming out of his mouth.
"Didn't know that pilot-work involved looking at symptoms of fibromyalgia."
"I was just browsing around for a minute."
"Mhm...... if you say so." she responded and then went to go grab a cold drink from the fridge.
"I was just concerned about you." he finally blurted out, making her squint her eyes at him.
"I told you I'm fine, Jake." she sighed out. "Why can't you just leave it alone?"
"Because I don't believe that you're fine. And I'm really worried that something's seriously wrong. It's been weeks and if you still feel sick then I think you should go get checked out by your doctor!" he got up from the chair to approach her and wrap her in his arms.
"I did go see my doctor." she quickly responded. Jake cocked his head at her. "I'm not sick, I promise. So you can relax and let it go."
"If you're not sick then...... did I do something wrong?"
"No, Jake. You didn't do anything wrong."
"Then why won't you talk to me? It's starting to scare me the way you've been acting."
"It's nothing worth talking about. I promise you I am not sick, that I am not rethinking our relationship, that I will eventually be okay. I just need a little time to get through this on my own. So just drop it, okay." she softly begged of him, eyes glazing and pleading.
"Is it your family? Are they okay?" he asked worriedly.
"They're fine."
"Your job?"
"Job's fine. Everything is fine. Everyone is fine. I am fine. We are fine. Please, Jake......" she sighed at him. The fight in her is long gone and she was both tired and annoyed. "Please..... drop it. I'm begging you."
Her tone was quickly becoming one of distraught and Jake became very pained and guilty over it. He was pushing her. He knew he was pushing her. But he was just so worried. Taking a deep breath and having a quick moment to himself to calm down, he finally swallowed his retort and nodded.
"I'm sorry, darlin'. I really am. I swear I'm not doing this to hurt you. I just hate seeing you so down. I want you to be okay." he gave her another squeeze. A loving squeeze where he rest his cheek against her head and softly caressed her hair.
"I know. And I love that you care. I love you very much, and I appreciate your tentativeness. I promised I was okay, and I am asking for you to believe me. Or at least trust that I can take care of it on my own."
"I do trust you. I just hope you know that you don't have to do it on your own."
"I know you're always there when I need you, but this isn't something you can really help with." she told him, and then placed a gentle kiss against his lip to ease his worries.
"Is there anything that I can do?" he asked her. "Anything at all? No matter how little it may be."
"Hm.... I've been in the mood for some chicken on the grill. Would it be too much trouble to get that thing going for dinner tonight?" she hoped, the first sign of her old self coming to the front. It made Jake happy seeing some semblance of the woman he loved.
"It's no trouble at all, darlin'. I'd be happy too."
"Good. Sounds good." she smiled. "So are we good now?"
"Yeah. We're okay, baby. And I'm sorry."
"It's alright. I accept your apology. I'm sorry for worrying you, I know I haven't been in the best mood lately. I'll be better about it."
"It's alright. Don't push yourself, take all the time you need." he urged her. Her smile got wider and she kissed him again.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
"As long as we're on the same page, I gotta get to work. I'll see you at dinner."
She went off to work and Jake had felt a bit better after their talk. He went about his day with lighter feet and a weight lifted off his shoulders. Not wanting to disappoint his girlfriend, he decided to get a head start on that dinner he promised her. He got dressed and headed to the store. He prowled the isles for some chicken breasts, some fresh potatoes, a bottle of wine, and some charcoal for the grill.
He brought it all to the front to checkout and the employee was quick to get him going. He swiped his card to pay, only to see "declined" pop up on the screen. Confused, he double checked that he used the right card. When he was sure he did, he tried again -thinking maybe he swiped it the wrong way. But the card declined again.
"I am so sorry. I think I have cash on me." he told the employee and scavenged through his wallet for a few bills. Thankfully he had enough to cover the purchase.
Heading back home and putting away the groceries, Jake opened up his laptop to check his with his banking. It was odd that his credit card would just decline like that. Worried that there was a hold he didn't know about, he quickly scanned his transaction history. He doesn't often use his credit card, so there wasn't much to scan through. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary until he got to just over a month ago. A CVS transaction in a a random town that he doesn't ever drive through popped up as suspicious by his bank.
Worried that his account had been compromised, he quickly called his bank and got in touch with a representative.
"My card just recently declined on a purchase, and I'm noticing in my bank history that there's a suspicious purchase at a CVS from a month ago."
"Just one moment while we look into that." the representative said and then put him on a hold for a few minutes. Ugly elevator music blasted against his ear drum that was slowly making him go crazy. "Alright so I'm seeing that there are two names connected with your card."
"Yeah, my girlfriend and I share it."
"Is it possible that she made the purchase?"
"I don't think so. We don't live on that side of the state."
"Alright. If you give me just a moment, I might be able to pull up an itemized bill." she said and the line went silent on her end for about a minute. "The card was used to pay for Ibuprofen, Nyquil, and a pregnancy test. Does any of that sound familiar to you?" the representative asked and Jake nearly gave himself whiplash with how hard his head jerked up.
"I'm sorry, could you repeat that for me?" he asked, not sure if he heard correctly.
"Of course. The bill statement shows a purchase at CVS for Ibuprofen, Nyquil, and a pregnancy test. Could that have been purchased by you or your girlfriend?"
Jake sat there slack-jawed, almost in shock at the sheer possibility of it all. There's no way his girlfriend would use his card to pay for a pregnancy test! Absolutely not. That would just be stupid..... But everything was starting to make sense: the constant fatigue, the nausea and skipping meals, the mood changes. And then her saying she saw her doctor.
"Um... yeah, yeah I think she might've used the card for that....." Jake finally responded.
"If you think you've been compromised, we can put a hold on your card and issue you a new one."
"Can you put a temporary hold on it while I confirm with my girlfriend? And I'll call back later?"
"Of course, sir. Let me just give you a reference number for your claim, so you don't have to jump through hoops to unfreeze your account. We can freeze your card for twenty-four hours."
"Yeah, that'll be fine. I'll call back tomorrow morning."
Jake was able to get that taken care of, but the confirmation of the purchase only added a new kind of stress to him. There was no way she was pregnant, right? Just no way. And then her voice was ringing in his ears, 'I've been in the mood for chicken'. Was she already having cravings? How far along was she? The test was bought a month ago, and Jake knew that the earliest women can even tell is four to six weeks when they miss their period. She had to be at least three months pregnant. What if she was further along? What if she was several months in and she had kept it a secret this whole time.
No, that was crazy talk. She's on birth control. She takes it every night before bed. Even if she was pregnant, she wouldn't hide it for that long. She wouldn't be able to. She'd be showing any day now if she was that far along.
His leg was bouncing rapidly as his thoughts raced a mile a minute. He wrung his sweaty hands together and messed with imaginary dust particles on the table. The suspicious purchase still showing on his laptop screen was laughing at him. It made him feel uneasy. He closed his laptop.
He felt uneasy, and couldn't really find the strength to do anything other than pace his house. Before he knew it, the entire day had passed and his girlfriend should be getting home from work soon. He rushed to get the grill going out back and prepared the chicken and potatoes while the coals got hot. His girlfriend came home the moment he put the chicken on the grill. She came around back to greet him with a smile and a kiss. He tried to reciprocate it, but it was hard to force it.
"Chicken won't be ready for a little while." he told her.
"I'll go take a shower then. Thank you for cooking tonight."
"Of course. Not a problem." he forced a grin. She kissed him one more time then went in the house to shower, and Jake was left alone with the chicken and his thoughts.
He made up both of their plates when the food was ready and set the table. He was already sitting in his own chair when she emerged from the shower in a fresh pair of silk pajamas. Normally Jake loved her special silk pajamas, but he was starting to remember that she was wearing silk pajamas right around the time she would've conceived. He remembered that night too. He can pinpoint exactly when she would've gotten pregnant.
"Jake?" he heard her voice speak out to him. He jerked back into consciousness.
"Yeah?"
"I just said that dinner tastes amazing....." she told him curiously. "Are you feeling alright? You haven't touched your food at all......"
"I'm fine." he replied, another forced smile. "Are you feeling alright?"
"I'm fine, I told you that already."
"I know. Just making sure. Because you're not sick, right?"
"That's right....."
"You saw your doctor to make sure you weren't sick, right?"
"Jake I thought we talked about this." she sighed and practically slammed her silverware on her plate in frustration. "Why are you bringing it up again."
"Did you buy a pregnancy test last month at CVS?" Jake suddenly blurted out. This made his girlfriend practically choke on air.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"The credit card history showed a suspicious purchase at CVS last month. I called the bank and they told me that it was used to buy some medicine and a pregnancy test. And it all makes sense to me: you start to feel sick, so you go to CVS and buy some medicine, and you pick up a pregnancy test because you think it might be a possibility. And you're still feeling sick because you are pregnant and you haven't told me because-" he goes off on a rant, but gets interrupted by his girlfriend violently standing from her chair.
"Because I'm not pregnant, Jake!" she states sternly, yet sadly. Jake shuts his mouth for a moment and lets her speak. "It was a false positive. That's why I went to my doctor. I'm not pregnant, so you can relax. Hope it makes you happy."
And then she walked away. Jake heard her stomp her way to their bedroom and slam the door closed. Jake was left alone at the kitchen table, unsure if he should feel relieved, upset, or guilty. Maybe all three. At the very least he was definitely confused.
He tentatively followed after her and knocked on the bedroom door that she had locked him out of. He could hear her crying inside the room.
"Babe? Darlin' open up." he softly begged, but was met with only more crying. "Let me in and we'll talk about it."
"Go away!" she cried out at him.
"Darlin' please. I love you and I want to talk through this together." he knocked again, but she didn't let him in. With a sigh, he walked back to the kitchen and rummaged through the junk drawer for the spare set of keys he kept there. He found them and went back upstairs and unlocked the door himself. His girlfriend was sitting on the floor pressed up against the foot of the bed, huddled and crying.
He dropped to his knees in front of her, attempting to draw her in for a hug but she rejected him. She turned away from him, hiding and crying some more.
"Sweetheart.... please just talk to me. I don't understand anything that's going on here. I just want to understand."
"Understand what?" she sniffled out.
"Like why you didn't tell me. Why you're so upset over it."
"I didn't tell you because I'm not pregnant. So what's the point. And I'm upset because it hurts."
"Upset because it hurts? You're hurt that you're not pregnant?" he questioned slowly, hoping he understood correctly. At her nod, he braced himself for one hell of a conversation. "I don't understand. You want to have a baby?"
"Jake... I'm thirty-six years old. I'm not getting any younger here. I'm running out of time to actually have a baby." she explained, but this only served to create more questions than answers.
"Thirty-six is not old. You're acting like you've hit menopause." he tried to chuckle out and lighten the mood. It didn't work.
"It is when it comes to having a baby. Being thirty-six already classifies me as a high-risk pregnancy. The older I get only increases chances of complications for carrying to term. If I can even get pregnant by that point. Not to mention, I'm not even married yet. I have to wait for that to happen, and then wait to actually get pregnant when it's time to try. By that point I'll probably actually hit menopause."
She began to cry again. Full on cry. Tears dripping down her silk top and face turning beet red. She choked on air as she wailed, and nothing Jake did was able to calm her down. He pulled her into his arms and rubbed at her back, but she just continued on despite his shushing.
"It's alright, sweetheart. I didn't know this was that important to you. Why didn't you ever say anything before?" he carefully asked her.
"We've only been together for a year. And you were on deployment for most of that time." she reminded him. "Besides, I thought I'd already be a mom by this point in my life. Until my fiancé just left me at the alter." she sniffled out.
"What he did to you then has no power over what you choose to do now. If you really want to be a mom, then... I dunno... let's try. I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to be a dad some day."
"We're not even married, Jake."
"Who cares? We live in the twenty-first century, darlin'. There's no law saying you have to be married before you have a child."
"Statistically speaking, couples who have children before getting married end up splitting and those children don't grow in nurturing environments."
"So you're a mathematician now?" he chuckled at his own joke, but she wasn't having any of it. She pulled her head from his chest to glare at him. "Sorry." he apologized.
"Ya know... I've always had this fantasy idea that I would get married, and we'd get pregnant on the honeymoon, and I'd be able to tell my family at Christmas.... It's stupid I know, and probably makes no sense whatsoever."
"It's not stupid. You're a hopeless romantic."
"If I had been pregnant now, then we could've had a Christmas baby." she told him with a saddened hope. A saddened hope of it-could-never-be. Jake looked at her with a longing he hadn't felt in awhile. And an idea popped into his head.
"You still take birth control?" he asked her.
"Yeah."
"Where is it?"
"In the bathroom, why?"
"Come with me." he helped her to her feet and took her into the bathroom where he scoured for her packet of birth control. When he found it, he began popping the pills out of the foil packaging and tossing them in the toilet. "If you want to have a baby, then let's have a baby."
"But we're not married......" she reiterated. When Jake was finished popping out all the pills, he threw away the package and turned to her, taking her into his arms.
"So let's pretend for a moment. Let's pretend I have a ring with me, and let's pretend that I get down on one knee." he acted out his words, and knelt down before her on his right knee, still keeping his hands on her waist and looking up at her lovingly. "Let's pretend that I have this whole speech prepared out for you, where I say that I love you so fucking much. And that I can't imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone else. And that if there was a woman out there who would be the mother of my children, it would be you. And then let's pretend that I ask you to be my wife. What would you say in that hypothetical situation?"
As he spoke to her from down on one knee, she found herself crying once again. But for a different reason this time. She couldn't believe that any of this was real. She had to be dreaming, right? But she wasn't. When she looked down at him, all she could see was the man she loved dearly smiling up at her.
"I'd say yes if you asked me to marry you."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." she nodded back and giggled. Jake stood back up on both feet and picked her up in a tight hug. He then kissed her with everything he had.
"I guess I better go out and get you a ring tomorrow."
"Only hypothetically, right?" she joked, making him laugh loudly.
"Hypothetically. But if we really want to have that wedding and Christmas baby, we better get started right away. We're falling behind schedule here."
"Are you sure you want to....?" she asked him hesitantly.
"Of course I do! Babe, I meant what I said. There is no one else on this entire Earth who I'd rather be with. Every time I come home, I hope you're still there. I don't want anyone else in my bed -our bed."
"You do realize that if I get pregnant now, I'd be showing so much by the wedding that I'd have to be wheeled down the isle."
"So we'll move it up a couple months. I'm thinking a nice, breezy September wedding where you'll walk down the isle in a beautiful short-sleeved dress, and the trees are starting to turn, and the air smells like spices. We'll honeymoon somewhere warm and then come home to a beautiful Christmas baby. What do you say?"
"I say that sounds perfect." she hummed.
Jake kissed her, soft and sweet. He caressed her face in his palms and let his thumbs rub away the slowly drying tears that started to stain her cheeks. She kissed him back with just as much love as he gave her. Her arms came up to hold him closely, just feeling his body pressed against hers and his muscles underneath her fingertips.
He was perfect. Absolutely perfect. She loved this man with all her heart, so it was no question whether or not she wanted to marry him. She wanted to be his wife and the mother of his children. There was no time like the present to start that journey.
She softly pulled on his t-shirt, trying to get it up his strong torso and off his body. They only broke apart for a split second so he could rid himself of the fabric. Then he was right back to kissing her. This time with more ferocity. He let his tongue push into her mouth and she allowed him in. Soft moans fell from her lips and a tingle vibrated between her thighs. God how she wanted him.
"Jake..." she huffed out between kisses. "Please touch me."
"I am touching you, darlin'." he chuckled out against her mouth. This made her whine.
"Not what I meant."
"Well then tell me what you want. Where do you want me to touch you?" he rasped against her. She swallowed thickly.
"I want you to take my clothes off and take me to bed." she breathed deeply, but he made no move to oblige her request.
"I actually quite like seeing you in these silky pajamas. I ever tell you how much I love them?"
"Can never keep your hands off me." she giggled lightly.
"I wish you could see yourself the way I see you." he groaned out and then kissed her again. His lips trailed over hers, then left wet marks over her cheeks, and then tickled down her neck. She tilted her head back, letting him mark up as much space as he wanted. Her breaths started coming in low pants. "Look in the mirror at how flushed you are." he instructed her, using his nose to nudge her face in the direction of their large vanity mirror.
She was indeed flushed -skin turning several shades of dark pink. She was completely wanton and needy as her boyfriend -fiancé- attacked her neck and collarbones with nips and kisses. Her eyes became heavy and lidded and hard to keep open as pure bliss filled her body.
Jake turned her so her body was facing the mirror, and he got behind her. His hand toyed with the hem of her silk tank top, inching it up her body so he could get his hands underneath and cup her breasts. All the while he continued to kiss her neck. But he looked up at her and connected eyes with her through the mirror. A smirk cut through all his kissing and she heard him chuckle at her.
"Look at you. So fucking beautiful. You'd be even more beautiful with my baby growing inside you." he rasped again.
"Oh my god...." she moaned loudly.
The air was getting thicker by the second and slick was beginning to coat the inside of her thighs. Because her shorts were silk, her arousal was just getting smeared by the fabric.
"Jake please! Please put a baby inside of me." she begged of him. His response was a guttural growl and a harsh bite to the side of her neck.
With one hand still on her breast, the other hand came down to unbutton his jeans and pull down the fly. He pushed the fabric down just enough for him to reach into his boxer briefs and grip his rapidly hardening cock and pull it out. His pretty pink tip was already leaking precum. As much as he just wanted to fill her up, he was still a considerate man and held himself back in favor of getting her all nice and prepped for him. She didn't need much prepping though -she was already soaking wet and quivering under his touch. As his fingers toyed with her outer lips, she bucked against his hand and whined out.
He took her arousal on his finger tips and used the slickness to quickly rub over her clit. Her thighs shook, trying to close his hand in. He tsk'd her. Not eager with his slow foreplay, she grabbed hold of his wrist and guided his hand how she liked it. She forced two of his fingers to dip inside of her and slowly fuck her at a steady rhythm while his thumb continued to rub circles on her bundle of nerves. She hissed and rolled her hips against him.
"Jake please." she tried begging once more. "Please please please just fuck me!"
"Alright, baby. Be a good girl and bend over for me." he commanded and she followed orders.
She pressed her breasts against the porcelain of the counter top, wiggling her ass at him and pleading over and over again. She looked over her shoulder at him to see him stroking himself a few times, gathering the precum dripping to the floor and using a mix of it and her arousal to lube himself up. He bunched her silky shorts aside, exposing her heated pussy, and ran his tip through her slick. Then, slowly, inch by growing inch, he pushed into her.
"Oh my gooooood! Jake!" she huffed out once he was fully bottomed within her. Jake took a moment to just feel her. Feel her wrapped around him and clenching tightly. They moaned in unison as he slowly pulled back out, just to slowly push back in. His tip dragged along her g-spot at an agonizing pace.
"Fuck, baby. You feel so fucking good." he grunted behind her. "Look so fucking good too. Look at yourself."
He grabbed a fistful of her hair and yanked her head back so she was looking up at herself in the mirror. Cheeks flushed pink, mouth wide open, eyes glassy. She was exactly how he wanted her. There was something erotic about making eye contact through the mirror as he began to absolutely rail her from behind. They've never fucked in front of a mirror like this, but she was starting to think that needed to change as she looked him over through the reflective material.
Beautiful pink lips pulled tight in concentration, a bead of sweat forming on his brow, muscles nice and taut at he held her down and thrusted into her. He was fucking beautiful. Just the sight of him could make her cum if she focused hard enough. But it was the feel of his cock stretching her out and pounding against her g-spot that really had her seeing stars.
It didn't take long for the mirror to start to become foggy from her heavy breaths and the spike in temperature. Jake's fingers dug deep into her hips as he pushed and pulled her in rhythm with himself. She knew there'd be bruises tomorrow and she couldn't wait to see them. Her scalp burned as he continued to tangle his fingers in her locks and pull harshly.
"Fucking beautiful, baby." he was huffing out. "Gonna fucking fill you up. You want that?" he asked.
"Yes please! Please, Jake! Cum inside of me!"
"Come on, baby. Cum with me. Let me feel you."
The hand in her hair let go so his fingers could go back to rubbing her clit. Quick, harsh circles had the air knocked out of her. She gripped onto the counter for dear life as the muscles in her stomach clenched tight and a fire coursed through her veins, racing towards her overstimulated cunt. Jake felt her sqasm around him and he groaned out, increasing his pace until it got to be too much and he stuttered on his thrusts. He held out just long enough for her to cum first, and then he spilled inside of her, coating her insides with him.
Their juices mixed together and dripped down her thighs. She knew there was no salvaging her pajamas. They'd have to be put into the wash. But she didn't really care as she felt him twitch deep inside of her. She pushed back against him and wiggled her ass.
"I'm gonna take you to bed....." he pressed a sloppy kiss just under her ear. "And I'm gonna love you all night. And I'm not gonna stop loving you until there's a baby in your belly."
"Mmmm. I want at least two kids." she hummed back, half lost in thought as she came down from her high.
"I'll give you as many kids as you want, darlin'."
"Take me to bed, Jake."
He picked her up in his arms and exited the bathroom. He'll clean up the mess tomorrow. For now, his only priority was making sure the love of his life was happy and satisfied. The idea of having a bunch of tiny feet scampering throughout the house was quite honestly a dream. She thought she was getting too old, but truthfully Jake was starting to think the same of him. Forty was just around the corner and he hadn't been in a stable relationship long enough to even have that conversation until now.
He'll give her a baby, because he wants one too. He'll give her ten babies if she asked him. And tomorrow he'll go out and get a ring because he knew there was nothing better than this.
Summary: Hangman and Rooster think they have a chance at dating their friend Knockout, but Phoenix is convinced they're wasting their breath.
She was just a friend. That's it. Rooster, Hangman, Phoenix, and Knockout were like 4 peas in a pod. She had known them for years, been by their side in battle, had seen their best and worst. She was there when Hangman got his air to air kill. She was there when Rooster had graduated aviation school. She was there when Phoenix had been given her call sign. They were all inseparable, despite the constant bickering and arguing that happened when they were together.
She was a friend.
She was their best friend.
And yet, somehow, Rooster and Hangman got the idea that they had a chance with her. Phoenix wasn't sure when exactly it started, but she noticed how both men began to eye Knockout when she walked into the room; their eyes would skim her up and down and they'd lick their lips. Then it evolved to blatant flirting with her. They weren't shy with their comments about how beautiful she looked, or how she'd look nice sitting on someone's knee. But when they were questioned about this newfound interest, they passed it off as them just teasing their friend. And she didn't mind it. She laughed along with their flirts. Even threw some back. And then finally both Hangman and Rooster started going at each other over who had a better chance at scoring her.
Phoenix was sick of hearing the two of them brag about themselves to each other, claiming they were what she was looking for when in reality nothing could be further from the truth. Any time she walked away, they were at each other's throat.
"She likes me more!" they'd say, and then rattle off some bullshit example trying to prove them right. Like if Knockout hugged one of them but not the other, that was proof. Or if she tossed out a specific flirt, that was proof too. They were like school children fighting over a new toy.
"I'm gonna go get another drink." Knockout said, stacking her pool cue against the table and walking away. As soon as she was out of earshot, the arguing started.
"Give up, Bradshaw. You don't stand a chance." Hangman immediately got the first word in.
"Don't know how you managed to become a pilot with how god damn blind you are." Rooster spit right back.
"The day she stoops so low as to choose you over me is the day Earth stops spinning." smirked Hangman, twirling that toothpick in his mouth.
"I'm the better man for her!"
"No, I am!"
"You're both wrong." Phoenix cut in.
"Stay outta this, sweetheart." Hangman told her.
"No. I'm tired of hearing you both fight over a woman you'll never get in a million years."
"Just because you're not eye catching, doesn't mean the rest of us aren't either." insulted Hangman.
"I'm just trying to protect you both. Although I'm starting to think you deserve the humiliation."
"Protect us from what? Good sex? Go be a cock block somewhere else." said Rooster with a roll of his eyes.
"She's gay." blurted Phoenix. Both men turned to her and laughed at her.
"Oh yeah?" challenged Hangman. "What the hell gives you that impression?"
"Well, for one, she checks out women more often than you do her."
"All women do that." replied Rooster, not at all convinced.
"Yeah, that's not proof of anything." Hangman backed him up.
"Alright. How about the fact that she's getting real close and personal with that woman at the bar?" Phoenix then pointed out, extending a finger toward Knockout and a pretty little blonde hanging out at the bar top.
Knockout was leaning her back against the top as the woman she was chatting up stood in front of her, real close and cozy. Both women were laughing at something or other, so much so that the woman had doubled over and braced her hands on Knockout as she laughed. Knockout didn't seem to mind the contact at all.
"That's nothing." commented Hangman with a scoff. "I've seen women do way more than that and not be gay."
"Porn doesn't count." chuckled Phoenix.
"Oh please. I've seen you adjust another woman's bra strap for her." Rooster brought up as if he hit the nail on the head.
"You're right. I did." admitted the brunette pilot. "And then I fucked her afterwards."
"Bullshit." both men dismissed her. Phoenix shrugged giving up on the fight.
"Fine. Continue this little battle. But when Knockout makes a fool out of you, don't come crying to me and say I didn't warn ya."
"She'd choose me in a heartbeat. I bring more to the table.... and the bedroom." smirked Hangman, once again twirling that stupid toothpick.
"Of course you have to bring stuff to the bedroom; women have to find someway to get an orgasm since you can't find the clit." spat Rooster, getting up in the other man's face, begging for a fight.
"Will you two idiots stop arguing?" came Knockout's voice. "The entire bar can hear you." she laughed.
The trio turned to her, watching as she approached them with a fresh round for each of them. She handed a drink to everyone, with many thanks.
"We're not arguing, sweetheart." smiled Hangman.
"Yeah. We're just talking." Rooster followed up.
"Don't you worry your pretty little head."
"Then why the hell are you two yelling about cock blocking and clits?"
Phoenix sat back in her seat, crossing her arms over her chest and awaiting how the two of them were gonna get out of this one.
"No no, pretty girl, you misheard us." diverted Rooster, and Phoenix groaned.
"Okay. I can't take it anymore. Girl, they've been fighting with each other over who has a better chance at getting into your pants!" Phoenix cried out. She threw her hands up in the air in exhaustion. If this thing didn't end soon, she'll go drown herself in the ocean.
"Thanks, Phoenix." both men deadpanned. They shot daggers at her. But Knockout just laughed.
"Seriously? That's what this whole thing was about?"
"Yes, and I'm tired of it. They won't shut up about who's superior."
"And?" Knockout asked, turning her attention back to the two men. They leaned against their pool cues.
"And what?" Rooster urged, confused.
"Who's superior?" she demanded to know. Hangman and Rooster took one look at each other and then exploded.
"I'm obviously the better man!" they yelled out simultaneous.
"Tell this idiot you wouldn't give him a second glance even if your life depended on it!" cried Rooster, nodding his head to the pilot beside him.
"No, tell this idiot that he needs to get his head out of his ass and set some realistic expectations for himself!" Hangman followed up.
Knockout laughed. She didn't say a single word, just laughed. She doubled over, trying to hold herself up by the pool table as she cackled out the most guttural laugh she could muster.
"What's so funny?!" the men demanded.
"You two!" she laughed back.
"Come on, be serious! If you had to choose between us, who would you choose?!" the offer was slapped on the metaphorical table by Hangman. For once, Rooster teamed up with him and backed him up. They both looked at her expectantly.
She straightened up, wiping her eyes clear of the tears that had accumulated. But when she saw their unwavering expressions, she got more serious.
"Come on, guys. You're joking, right?"
"No they're not. I keep telling them you're not interested." chimed Phoenix.
"She's convinced you're gay." Rooster rolled his eyes.
"Oh really?" Knockout said in disbelief, turning her attention to the woman. Her eyes were wide with playful contemption as she stared the woman down.
Phoenix shrunk back in her chair, not liking the odds of this conversation. Maybe she was wrong. Maybe she had Knockout pegged all wrong and Rooster and Hangman had an actual bite on her.
"Yeah, tryna tell us both that we're wasting our breath." Rooster brought the conversation back, allowing Phoenix a break from the stares of the woman.
"I don't think you're wasting your breath." commented Knockout in a sweet voice. She stepped a little closer to the two men, putting up the flirtatious act. Or, well, maybe it wasn't an act. Phoenix wasn't so sure anymore.
"So tell us. Who would you choose?" Hangman asked again.
Knockout looked between them for a moment, entertaining their idea. Still, even if she wasn't gay, Phoenix was positive she wouldn't spare them the time. They were friends, damn it! She wasn't interested in them!
Too many seconds had passed for their liking. The two of them urged her again for an answer, cocking their eyebrows and getting closer to her.
But she backed away from them. She gave a sweet smile, then turned towards Phoenix in her seat, approached her, climbed in her lap, took her face in her hands, and crashed their lips.
Phoenix's breath hitched and her entire body tensed underneath the woman. Her eyes widened, her brain stopped working. But Knockout grinded into her lap and tangled her fingers in the babyhairs underneath her bun, and Phoenix was gone.
Her hands grabbed the woman's waist, keeping her locked in her lap. Phoenix probed her tongue into Knockout's mouth, mapping her out. Both women moaned lightly, making Phoenix's head swim with endorphines.
But it was all ended when Knockout pulled away. She held a smirk on her kissed lips, confident, proud. She used her thumb to wipe away the glisten that had accumulated on Phoenix's mouth. And then she slid off her lap and grabbed her drink she left on the pool table.
Phoenix's eyes snapped between her and the men. Her male friends seemed to be just as surprised as she was. Jaws had slackened to the floor, eyes had gone as wide as saucers, and maybe one of them popped a boner but she wasn't really paying attention to that.
Pride had swelled in her chest at seeing them like this. She was right. She had been right all along.
"Told you!" she smirked triumphantly. Her cry of victory pulled the men out of their shell-shock.
"I can't fucking believe it." murmured Hangman.
"Oh my god. She's gay." Rooster seemed to say more so to himself than anyone else, like he was convincing himself. Knockout just kept sipping on her drink. "You're gay." he repeated, turning his attention to her.
"Oh you both are so adorable. I'm not gay." she chuckled. And the three of them jumped to attention.
"What?!" they all yelled incredulously.
"You're not?!" Phoenix sputtered in disbelief. "But- the kiss!"
"No. I'm not." she grabbed Rooster by the collar of his uniform and yanked until he bent to her level. "I'm bi." and then she gave him a kiss just as heated as the one she gave Phoenix, forcing her tongue into his mouth.
They battled tongues for a good moment, getting him all heated and needy, before she pulled back and gave his cheek a quick pat. His eyes were clouded with confused lust, watching her turn to walk away.
"I'll catch you guys back on base." she threw over her shoulder.
"Hey! Wait!" Hangman called after her. She stopped and turned back around with a knowing grin.
"What?" she held her hands on her hips.
"What about me?!" he asked, offended.
Gingerly, she stepped up to him and held his chin between her fingers. His eyes were hopeful as he watched her every move.
"Get rid of that god damn toothpick and then we'll talk." she presented the offer. Without missing a beat, Hangman spit the chewed up piece of wood to the floor and then pulled her in by her waist to kiss her.
This time, it wasn't Knockout that lead the kiss. Hangman was the one to pry her lips open with his tongue, and his hands gripped both her ass and her loose locks. He kissed her with ferver, eager for more, begging for more, trying for more. But she didn't allow him more. She placed her hands on his chest and forced him away. He was left with just as dazed an expression as Rooster.
She patted his cheek like she did Rooster and chuckled. She caressed his face in her hands, pressing her thumb between his lips. He gladly sucked it into his mouth.
"Desperation looks good on you, Lieutenant." she said, and then pulled away completely. She reached down to the ground, picking up his disregarded toothpick and stuck it back between his slack lips. "Don't litter." was all she said, and then she turned to walk away again, this time managing to get out the door.
Relationship(s): Lt. Natasha "Phoenix" Trace/Original Female Character
Words: 16,398 (I am so sorry)
Warnings: None
Summary: Due to popular demand (really, I only needed 1 person to ask for this lmao) here is a part 2 to Call Sign: Sweetheart. Sorry it's so long. I had trouble trying to come up with a plot and connecting it to the previous fic. I didn't intent to make a part two so I had a lot of filler. Anyway, enjoy.
Phoenix had set her alarm on her phone the night before. She needed to be up early so she could head back to her hotel, get herself cleaned up, straighten out her uniform, and make it to base on time. It was day one of whatever TOPGUN had in store for her. Plus she had to walk back to her hotel. So it was imperative she woke up early enough to give herself the time she needed to get presentable. But she was also considerate of her bed mate beside her. She set her alarm for the early hours, but kept the volume down low enough to not disturb Sweetheart.
But when the alarm went off, despite its soft tone chiming in her ear, Phoenix woke to see Sweetheart up and at 'em as well. Sweetheart rubbed the sleep from her eyes and yawned wide while she scratched her tangled hair, seemingly forgetting for a moment that she wasn't alone in bed. Once Phoenix squirmed into an upright position, it was when Sweetheart realized her presence.
"Morning." Sweetheart smiled.
"Morning. Did I wake you? I tried to keep the volume down." she said apologetically.
"You can pull the girl out of the Navy, but the training sticks with you. I haven't slept through an alarm since I was fifteen."
"I figured you would've adjusted back to civvy life over the last two years." commented Phoenix.
"I wish." laughed Sweetheart. "Do you know how much easier my life would be if I could go a single day without connecting anything to the Navy? And being able to sleep consistently for more than three hours?"
"But that's what makes life fun!" the other woman taunted. They shared a smile with each other, watching as the life in each other's eyes take over their color. Sweetheart loved Phoenix's eyes.
"You getting ready to head out?" Sweetheart suddenly broke the moment. Phoenix realized her mission and sprung into action, grabbing her forgotten uniform and putting it on.
"I have to walk back to my hotel and finish getting ready. I might do a dry bath if I can."
"I'll drive you back. That'll give you some more time to get ready." she said, jumping from the bed and grabbing her shoes.
"You don't have to-" Phoenix went to go dismiss the woman. Her timeliness wasn't Sweetheart's problem to deal with. Phoenix knew she'd be in this predicament when she agreed to stay the night.
"I wouldn't be happy knowing I was the reason you missed your report time. I had you for the night, I can say goodbye for the day."
"Seriously, you don't have to-"
"Shut up." Sweetheart smirked and then placed a gentle kiss on her cheek to keep her quiet. "No room for arguing. Come on. If we leave now, you can take an actual shower."
Phoenix just huffed out a laugh. Sweetheart didn't take no for an answer. Neither did Phoenix, honestly, but Sweetheart always won the fight. So she stopped trying to deny the offer of a ride, and laced up her boots. Once Sweetheart had her shoes on, she grabbed a jacket to cover herself up, and then both women left the hotel, got in her car, and drove off to Phoenix's hotel.
"Let me know what's going on, yeah? If you guys need anything, I'm happy to make a food run." Sweetheart tossed out through the window as Phoenix exited the car.
"I have a feeling we're gonna need it." laughed Phoenix.
"I got a new phone, but Rooster has my number. Just shoot me a text."
"Will do." and Phoenix turned to walk off.
"Tasha!"
"Yeah?" she turned around and quirked and eyebrow.
"It was good seeing you again." Phoenix's eyebrow dropped and a genuine smile replaced it.
"You too. I'll talk to you later."
And then she disappeared into her hotel. Sweetheart sat behind the steering wheel for a moment, letting everything from the past 24 hours sink in. It hit her all at once, that it happened. It was real. And then she squealed and did a happy dance in her seat like she was in high school and just got asked to the prom.
"Holy shit." she murmured to herself. "Okay, get yourself together."
She should go out and buy something pretty to wear. And take Tasha out on a date. Yeah. She put her car in drive and almost sped her way back to her hotel so she could put on some real clothes. Clothes that wouldn't make people grimace at her and dare to ask her why on Earth she decided to go out in public in them.
She dolled up a little bit: dressed in some decent clothes, ran a brush through her hair, brushed her teeth. And then she headed out again. It was early. Not many places would be open at this hour. If the sun wasn't up, neither were people. But there was always a boutique open somewhere in California. Heavy tourism practically demanded it. And she was determined to find it. A simple Google search told her what stores were open and where they were located. There weren't many, but it was a start.
Today was a day for pampering. She deserved it after everything she's been through. And now she has Tasha back in her life. Who, by the way, hasn't sent a single message yet. Sweetheart kept looking at her phone as she shopped around, hoping either she or Rooster would pop in with an update.
"It's only been an hour. Calm down." she told herself and then stuffed her phone back in her pocket.
She rummaged through another rack of clothes. Nothing popped out at her. She wanted something nice that Phoenix would like. Phoenix once made a comment about a shirt Sweetheart had -a dark navy blue shirt that Sweetheart had dubbed her 'I don't have anything to wear' shirt. Phoenix said she looked good in it. Sweetheart hadn't ever taken a second look at her shirt until then. After that, it was her favorite shirt to wear and would find as many opportunities to wear it as possible. Until it got bleach on it. It was a sad farewell.
Sweetheart felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. Excitedly, she pulled it out. Her smile fell when the notification ended up being the daily weather forecast. Sunny. Gee, who would've taken a guess at that. She put her phone away again...... After looking at it one more time in hopes Phoenix or Rooster would say something.
Sweetheart spent a few hours shopping around. She managed to find something nice to wear. Even bought a pair of shoes to go with it since she only brought her sneakers and her sandals. After that, she grabbed a quick brunch and a drink. All the while still staring at her damn phone. Seriously? Not a single text from either of them?! Her mom sent her a text though asking for a check-in. Making sure she's still alive and whatnot.
After brunch, she decided to walk along the pier. Anything to keep her mind off of the fact that TASHA ISN'T TEXTING! LIKE SHE SAID SHE WOULD!
It was warm outside. Not hot, just warm. It felt nice. Reminds Sweetheart of the time she and Phoenix went to the beach when they had an off day from work. Off days were few and far between, so they made sure to do anything and everything they could cram into those 24 hours. Sweetheart remembers one time when she got attacked by an entire grouping of seagulls because they saw she had a pretzel. Instead of helping, Phoenix was laughing her ass off and video taping it. And then Sweetheart tripped in the sand the seagulls covered over her fallen body as they attacked the pretzel that had been tossed from her hand.
"You should've just let it go." Phoenix hardly got the words out because she was laughing too damn hard.
"I paid ten-fucking-dollars for it! I wasn't gonna waste it!"
Sweetheart laughed as she thought back on it. She didn't laugh then, but now it was hilarious. She wonders if Phoenix still has that video?
There were a lot of memories here from when they were first at TOPGUN all those years ago. Like here on the pier, where they watched the sun set and then kissed like they were in a movie. And over there by the shops where Phoenix almost accidentally stole something because it got caught on her foot as she was walking out and the staff practically chased her down for it. And there by the ice cream parlor where they had their first official date. They had been together for months on base before they could actually go out and do something. At the time they were in a rush and could only spare a few moments. So they grabbed ice cream here, got some drinks at the Hard Deck, then went back to base. It wasn't much, but it was the beginning of something good.
Soon enough, the day had come and gone, the sun was setting, and Sweetheart was ready to head back to her hotel. Still no sign from Phoenix or Rooster. She had half a mind to send a text out just to make sure they were all good. She was sure they were just held up with training, or whatever it is they're doing. At this point, she probably wouldn't hear from either one of them until tomorrow after they had gotten some sleep. So she just ordered a late dinner, put her phone on the charger, and decided to shower while she waited for her food to arrive.
The hot water felt nice. The type of nice after a long day when you're just so worn out. Where you've spent hours upon hours just working yourself to death. Sweetheart remembers one time during training when she was just pushed well past her limits. It had several days of testing her mental capabilities in the air, as well as working her physical body to peak perfection. She had been ready to collapse, but held out because Rooster was going to throw Phoenix a birthday party at his place, and Sweetheart wanted to be there.
The party started off fine. There were some drinks, lots of music, games, and whatnot. Tasha was living it up, as she should seeing that she was the birthday girl. When presents started passing around, Sweetheart just felt something inside her shut down. She got dizzy and the room started to spin. The last thing she remembered was Tasha and Rooster rushing to her side, and then it just went black. When she woke up, she found herself in Rooster's bed with a worried Tasha wiping at her forehead with a wet cloth.
"You had me so worried!" she practically screeched, throwing her arms around Sweetheart in a tight hug.
"I guess I was just overworked. It's been a long week, Tasha. I'm sorry I ruined your birthday."
After getting some cold fluids in her from an equally worried Rooster, Sweetheart was then taken to the bathroom with promises of relaxation. Tasha had filled the tub with warm water and some of Rooster's bath soap. She then stripped the both of them of their clothes and they stepped into the steaming water. Tasha sat behind Sweetheart, keeping her arms around the tired frame of her girlfriend. She peppered kisses to her clammy shoulder and all Sweetheart could do was melt against her touch. They stayed like that for what felt like forever. But it was Sweetheart's favorite place to be.
Sweetheart heard her phone beep from the other room, pulling her out of her memory and excitedly peeking her head behind the shower curtain. It was either Phoenix or Rooster, or her food. And while she hoped it was the first option, she wouldn't be upset if her food was almost here.
She quickly scrubbed the last of the conditioner out of her hair, rinsed off the last of the body wash, turned off the water, stepped out of the shower, and wrapped a towel around her as she entered the bedroom. She grabbed her phone to see a new text message from an unknown phone number. All it said was her name followed by a question mark. It was Tasha!
"Hey, how was first day of TOPGUN?" she replied back. A second later, a new text message came through.
"A lot has happened. Free to talk?"
"Yeah, just one second. Just got out of the shower."
"Without me? :)"
Sweetheart had to contain herself from squealing again. But a blush was heavy on her cheeks. She could feel it. Quickly she got dressed in some pajamas and then dialed Phoenix's number.
"Took you long enough." Phoenix joked.
"Sorry. Been lost in thought for awhile."
"Thinking about?"
"You." Sweetheart gave the one-worded answer easily. She heard the other woman hitch her breath through the phone.
"And? Care to share with the class what's got you all distracted?" Phoenix urged with a teasing lust.
"Hmm. We'll save that conversation for another day. As much as I love phone sex, I'm really interested in what happened today." she said and Phoenix huffed.
"Where do I begin?" she asked rhetorically. "Hangman was being his usual asshole self, for starters."
"I don't even want to imagine how arrogant he was."
"He gets one air-to-air kill and makes it his entire personality, and then thinks that will single-handedly make him qualified for this mission."
"Mission? You guys got called back for a mission?" Sweetheart interrupted, a worried glower in her eyes as she stared at nothing.
"Yeah. Not really sure how much I'm allowed to share, but basically we've all been asked back to take down an enemy plant. And Hangman seems to think he's the only one qualified for the job. Him and Rooster kept butting heads during BFM training. Which, ultimately, cost me."
"Whatdyu mean? Hangman didn't kill your chances, did he?"
"No. Not yet, at least. But my arms are still sore from having to do 200 pushups thanks to Payback's stupid gamble."
"Why the fuck would Payback gamble out 200 pushups?!" Sweetheart asked in surprise. That was stupid, even for him. "I hope he had to join you in that punishment."
"Oh he did, don't you worry. Although it's making me wish you were here, ya know. With you as my partner, we've never lost."
"I wasn't sure with myself if I could stomach being back here." she admitted solemnly. This wasn't the time to get into the topic, but something had to be said. "I wasn't positive that I could handle the memories of what happened. Or having to face you on the off chance you wouldn't forgive me. I figured this was the safest course of action for me."
"Listen, I'm not blaming you for your decision. I get it. And I want you to do what's best for yourself. But that doesn't stop me from missing you behind me."
"Funny, usually you're behind me. Quite honestly, I prefer it that way." Sweetheart changed the conversation to something more light-hearted. And the innuendo was not lost on Phoenix. The brunette practically snorted with laughter.
"Well, keep sweet-talking me like that and we'll see what happens."
"Is that a promise, Lieutenant?"
"Oh it absolutely is."
"What's the time-frame for the mission? Is there any room for me to wiggle in at some point?"
"The entire thing is gonna be a few weeks. And based on what the Captain outlined, it's gonna be pretty loaded and hard-hitting until we set out for the actual mission." explained Phoenix.
"Damn." Sweetheart huffed. "You'll have to keep me updated."
"I will." Phoenix promised. "Oh! And speaking of the Captain, does the name Captain Pete Mitchell ring a bell at all? Call sign: Maverick?"
The question threw Sweetheart for a loop. What that had to do with anything, she wasn't sure. But she thought on it anyway. It took her a minute to rack through her brain for the name. It rang a bell. A small, quiet bell. But a bell nonetheless.
"Uh. Yeah. Kind of. He's another TOPGUN graduate, right? Supposed to be one of the best in the entire Navy. Why?"
"Rooster's got beef with him. Serious beef. And it manifested in training today -almost cost him his life. I tried to talk to him about it, but Rooster shut me out. I was wondering if you knew anything. He's got me worried."
Hearing the confession made her choke on air. Rooster was her friend, and just the thought of him being so careless like that and almost dying had her worried beyond belief. Rooster was not one to be so reckless. Hell, that's how he got the call sign Rooster. He waits. He's calculated. He's safe. What's going on?
"I haven't talked to Rooster, like actually talked, in at least a year. Maybe more." Sweetheart admitted. "But, even still, he never brought up the name Maverick before."
"It was worth a shot...." Phoenix trailed off. "Maybe you can talk to him. See what's going on. Because not only is he putting his life in danger, he's putting the rest of ours as well. If he gets kicked off this mission, we're left with Bagman. And, at that point, we might as well just say game over for us all."
"I'll talk to him. You're right; if Hangman is in charge, no one is gonna be coming home."
Sweetheart and Phoenix chatted for a bit more. Sweetheart's dinner arrive shortly and Phoenix had bid her a goodnight so she could eat in peace. Plus Phoenix had to be up early again tomorrow and she needed the sleep after the day she had today.
The following day panned out similar to the previous day. Sweetheart spent most of her time alone, just aimlessly walking about as she tried to pass the time until she could call Rooster and talk to him. She worried for her friend. Rooster had always been there for her, even when she shut him out, so the least she could do was lend an ear to him.
Her phone was silent all day as both Phoenix and Rooster were occupied with their training. It had to be brutal. She wondered just what they were up to. She remembered her time at TOPGUN -it wasn't fun at first. You were put through the ringer and tested on not only the things you knew but also the things you didn't know. But it wasn't all bad. There were good times at TOPGUN. The friends you make, the gratifying feeling of accomplishing something, and plus you get to fly fighter jets. Like, who wouldn't want to do that?!
Being in the backseat was a great feeling. Having Phoenix be her wingman in the sky was what made everything fun and worth it. Sweetheart missed it, and she somewhat started to question her decision to turn down the call. No one would ever be able to fly a plan smoother than Phoenix. No one would ever make Sweetheart feel as safe in a flying weapon as Phoenix did. They were a team. And she felt like she let her teammate down. Who did Phoenix even get paired up with? She didn't ask.
After dinner, Sweetheart spent a few hours at The Hard Deck just talking with Penny to keep herself occupied. Penny was a sweet woman and coming back here felt like coming back home. Penny asked her how she was doing, what she was up to, and all that good stuff. They talked as the older woman handed out drinks. Sweetheart suddenly had a thought, and decided to try her luck with it.
"What can you tell me about Pete Mitchell?" Sweetheart asked, taking a sip of her rum and coke.
"Maverick? What about him?" questioned the woman.
"Just wondering. I'm told him and Rooster aren't getting along."
"Oh. That." Penny said, sparking Sweetheart's interest. She leaned against the bar top trying to get closer for the details. "Listen, it's not really my place to talk about it. Have you talked to Rooster?"
Sweetheart sat back, dejected at not having any gossip to invest in. She took another sip of her drink.
"Waiting for him to be dismissed. Phoenix told me she tried to get something out of him, but he kept quiet. It's got me worried."
"Rooster is a grown man. You can't make him talk if he doesn't want to. But at least he's got a friend like you to go to if he does want to talk."
"Well, I owe him that much. I'm gonna go try him, see if he's done for the day."
She left her half finished drink on the bar and walked outside where it was quieter. She pulled out her phone and dialed Rooster's number. As expected, the call got forwarded to his voicemail. She left the standard message: hey, it's me, just calling to check in on ya. Call me back. Ya know, that spiel. But less than 60 seconds later, he called her right back.
"Rooster?"
"Hey, what's up."
"Nothing. Just calling to get my daily report." she chuckled lightly. "I got the basic run down from Tasha yesterday. Anything new today?"
"Not really. It's tough out here but we're all managing." Rooster replied easily, yet the tone of his voice was curt.
"Yeah? Even with Hangman on your ass?"
"He's not helping, but it could be worse."
"Hey, can I ask you a personal question?" Sweetheart gingerly steered the topic.
"Uh, sure?"
"Can I ask you what your history is with Maverick?" she asked him, and Rooster was silent for several seconds. Sweetheart could just see the veins in his neck twitching as he clenched his jaw.
"And what do you know about Maverick?" he clipped.
"Just asking. Phoenix told me you scared her yesterday with some dangerous stunt you pulled. That's not like you, and it's got me worried."
"It's none of your business!"
"Come on, Bradshaw. You've always been there for me. Let me be there for you." she begged of him. "Tell me what's going on."
"Maverick is the reason my dad is dead....." she heard him spit through the phone. "And then he had the audacity to pull my papers from the Naval Academy and set my career back four fucking years!"
Sweetheart stood silent. The conversation went quiet. The only sounds she could hear were from the bar behind her and from Rooster trying to calm himself with some breathing. Her mouth ran dry as she tried to think of something to say to that. What does she say?
"I'm so sorry, Rooster."
"Listen, I don't wanna fucking get into this right now. I'm tired, okay?"
"Rooster, you gotta promise me you'll keep a level head through this." she pleaded with him. "Whatever's between you and Maverick, it's not worth dying over. It's not worth putting the rest of the team at risk. I care about you and I want you to come home from whatever mission you're on, okay? And afterwards we'll hang out together. You and me. Like old times."
"Yeah, whatever." he tried to play it off. But it wasn't a promise.
"Promise me, Bradley Bradshaw!"
"Okay! I promise."
"Good."
"Listen, I gotta go."
"Call me if you need anything. I'm just twenty minutes away."
And then the call died. And Sweetheart was left standing in the sand, staring at her phone, looking like an idiot that got stood up on a date. She worried about him.
Many days passed and Rooster hadn't called her again. Phoenix did though, and she offered any updates that she could when asked about it. But the updates were very few considering the only thing the team is focused on is mastering their aircrafts. Rooster seemed to calm down over the days based on Phoenix's lack of reporting on out-of-character actions from him. At least that was a good sign.
"So when can I take you out?" she asked the brunette during another one of their phone calls. Sweetheart laid on her hotel bed on her stomach, phone pressed to her ear, and kicking her feet in the air like a teenager.
"How about now?" Phoenix surprised her with her answer.
"Now?"
"Grab a bathing suit. We're going to the beach!"
"What? Beach? You're actually serious."
"Listen, I'm not gonna question it. We've got a free day, and I intend on taking it. So get your cute butt in a bathing suit and get to the beach! Or else I'll drag you from your hotel room myself."
"Actually, I kinda like that sound of that. You gonna bring some rope?" teased Sweetheart. She wiggled her eyebrows as if Phoenix was in front of her. Even thought Phoenix couldn't see it, she sensed it.
"I'll wipe that look off your face. If you follow orders and come to the beach, I'll bring some rope."
"Promise?"
"Promise. Now come on. We're all heading out soon."
Sweetheart excitedly threw herself off the bed and rummaged through her bag for her bathing suit. She knew packing it was a good idea, and now she had the chance to wear it. And it was a cute one too. She got it right before she came to San Diego, hoping to impress Phoenix if their reunion yielded a positive result -which it did.
She tossed on a loose shirt over top of it, put on her sandals, grabbed a towel, and packed a small carry-on of essentials, and then headed to the beach. The ocean wasn't far from her hotel. A bit of a walk, yes, but given the heavy tourism traffic it was much more efficient to walk than to drive.
Today couldn't have been a better day for the beach. The sun was high in the sky, it was hot out, it was just perfect for the water. Sweetheart found a somewhat empty patch of sand and laid out her towel. She waited for Phoenix to text her telling her when they arrived. In the meantime, she covered herself in some sunscreen, flipped down her aviators, and lounged back to bask in the sun's rays. She hoped Tasha would like her bathing suit. What would Tasha be wearing? She's seen the brunette in nothing but a bra and panties before -if you don't count completely naked- and she is a sight to behold. Everything about her was just perfect...... Oh those were some dangerous thoughts to be having in public. Sweetheart looked around as if she could catch if people could read her mind.
Impatiently, Sweetheart watched the clock on her phone tick the minutes. Just waiting for a text, a call, something. And then.....
"We're here. You?"
"Kept me waiting long enough <3 Where are you?"
"We came in through the entrance by the hotel."
"I'll come find you."
Sweetheart quickly grabbed her stuff and practically ran down the beach towards them. She pushed through crowds of people, all of them watching her with irritated expressions as she pretty much gave no second thought to the people she pushed aside. But to hell with it. She didn't care. All she could think about was Tasha.... And maybe Rooster.... But mostly Tasha.
It was easy picking out the group of pilots on the beach. They were the only group where everyone was wearing aviators and had the physique of a military man (or woman). None of them spotted her approaching them, so she took the opportunity to do something cute. Carefully, she set her stuff down just a little ways away from theirs and snuck up behind Tasha, throwing her arms around the woman and yelling 'boo' in her ear. Tasha jumped and quickly whirled around, ready to punch whoever invaded her personal space. But she relaxed when she saw Sweetheart.
"Hey! You made it!" the pilot hugged her tightly.
"Was I not supposed to?" Sweetheart cheekily replied, which prompted a flick on her forehead.
"Hey there, Sweetheart!" Rooster greeted much happier than he did on the phone call. He came and gave her a hug, which caused the others to come give her a hug too. Fanboy hugged her so tightly and picked her up off the sand, making her squeal a bit.
"Didn't realize you were still here, Sweetheart!" he happily cheered.
"Can't get rid of me that easily, Garcia."
"Come on, girl. You gotta stop with the last name." he waved her off.
"Technically not Navy anymore." she reminded him.
"That means nothing. You'll always be one of us!"
"Yeah, Sweetheart. Once a pilot, always a pilot." Payback chimed in.
"Come on, enough talk. Let's play." said Coyote, holding up a football in his hand.
"Later, I'm stealing this cutie for a little bit." Phoenix said, giving a shoulder bump to Sweetheart as she spoke, making said woman conceal a grin. This garnered attention towards her, and she could hear Rooster whistle playfully.
Phoenix took her hand, intertwining their fingers, and pulled her down the shore away from everyone. But Sweetheart could feel eyes on them as they walked away. Everyone was watching them lean against each other and act all lovey dovey. But she didn't care. All she cared about was the woman beside her.
"I didn't realize so many people had been called back." Sweetheart randomly spoke. "Who are the others?"
"Well you already know most of them. The others you've probably heard of. Like Logan 'Yale' Lee and his WSO Brigham 'Harvard' Lennox are part of the Red Rippers. And Callie 'Halo' Bassett is part of the Redcocks." she said, pointing to each person she spoke of. "She's Neil 'Omaha' Vikander's WSO who is part of the Nighthawks."
"And that guy?" Sweetheart asked, pointing to the guy who refused to take his shirt off for whatever reason.
"Robert 'Bob' Floyd. He's my WSO. Comes from Lemoore. He's part of the Screaming Eagles."
"WSO huh? How does he hold up?" Sweetheart wiggled her eyebrow teasingly.
"He's not you, that's for sure." she replied. "But he stands alright. A bit awkward but nice."
"Well not everyone is brave enough to handle you."
"You've never complained before." Phoenix teased back, throwing her arm over Sweetheart's shoulders and pulling her into her side. She pressed a kiss to Sweetheart's cheek.
"I'm not complaining now. Although you did promise to bring some rope." she reminded.
"Later." Phoenix teased. "Right now, I just want to enjoy spending some time with you. It's been so long since it was just the two of us."
"It's not really just the two of us considering we've got those guys watching our every move." she pointed to the gaggle of pilots that seemed to be miles away. They were immersed into their game of football, tackling each other into the sand and cheering each other on. It didn't appear that anyone was on any sort of 'team'.
"Hangman's just upset you won't suck his dick." laughed the brunette. "Rooster just misses you. And the others? Well you let's just say Fanboy had a bet going seeing how long it takes us before we get back together."
"Have you given any thought of us getting back together?"
"I've thought about it a lot." she admitted.
"And?"
"And..... I want to. It's just, I feel really guilty for the things I've said to you. I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for treating you like dog shit when you were suffering really bad."
"I don't hate you for it." soothed Sweetheart. "I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at the fact that we had to come to this."
"You could've come to me. I would've done whatever I could to help you."
"I know that. I was just afraid. But not anymore. I'm tired of hiding, and letting this ruin my life. I miss being with you in a fighter jet, traveling the world, taking down the bad guys."
"It's not too late. It could still be you and me." Phoenix turned to her, cupping her face in her hands and stroking her cheeks. "We're a team. We've always been a team. I can't remember a time where it wasn't you in the jet behind me. I don't trust anyone else at my six."
"I already got my discharge. I've been dismissed. It's done."
"But you were called back. That's gotta count for something! Maybe we can get you your RE code, and you can come back. TOPGUN wanted you back, maybe you can reenlist through that and bypass all that paperwork bullshit."
"It's been too long, Tasha." Sweetheart said solemnly. "I'm way too rusty to be in the sky again."
"So you'll have to spend a few weeks back in basics again. So what? It's not the end of the world."
"I don't know, Tasha."
"Please? It's not the same without you."
The two women stood at the edge of the water, staring into each other's eyes as if the rest of the world didn't exist. And, to Sweetheart, it didn't. All she saw was Natasha Trace, the woman she's loved for years. The woman she wanted to marry one day. And the way Phoenix was stroking her cheeks with her thumbs was a comfort that brought back memories of the times she used to caress her face as they lay in bed together, basking in the afterglow of sex, when the endorphins were high and they were drunk on love. Life was boring without Natasha Trace. The transition back to civilian life was an adjustment that Sweetheart never got used to. She missed the Navy. She missed being a pilot. And she was angry that her life was stolen from her by a man who got his kicks abusing his power.
"I'll have to think about it. At the very least, it's too late to come back to TOPGUN. The mission is already underway and you have a new WSO. I won't have a place to fit in."
"After this mission, you and I are gonna spend some time together. And then maybe the Captain will let you do some training to get your wings all polished."
"If he even cares. Speaking of, how's Rooster holding out with Maverick?"
"Rooster's still closing himself off. He's not getting along with the Captain, but at least he hasn't almost killed himself again."
"Well that's good at least."
"Did he tell you what's going on?"
"Yeah, but I don't know if it's my place to share it. It runs deep, Tasha. And, quite frankly, I'm on Rooster's side. If what he says is true, I think his anger is justified. I worry where his head is at, but I don't think he's in the wrong here."
"As long as he doesn't ruin his chances for being on this mission. If I end up with Hangman, I might just drop out of this mission altogether." Phoenix sighed heavily.
"Enough talk about this. Now's not the time to be upset about work. Let's have some fun." Sweetheart attempted to cheer the woman up.
"We could go play football with the guys. Let's go beat their asses. Some of them deserve it."
"I'm always down to beat the shit outta Hangman." she said and both women laughed.
They intertwined their fingers again and turned around to walk back to the group. When they approached, Rooster and Fritz were celebrating triumphantly over something. Rooster flexed his muscles to show off the definition, getting into a muscle show-off with Hangman. But it seemed to be all in good fun as both men laughed and playfully pushed at each other.
"Hey boys." greeted Sweetheart. "Got room?"
"Hey hey, Sweetheart! Come on, girl. You and me!" hollered Fanboy.
"Nah, she's with me. Get your own partner." Phoenix defended.
"Come on, Nat. Don't be like that. We can share!"
"Phoenix? Share? Ha!" Rooster roared out a laugh, stabilizing himself on his knees.
"Phoenix doesn't share, but Sweetheart loves sharing. Ain't that right, darlin?" winked Hangman. Sweetheart wanted to throw up in her mouth. Phoenix was in offense mode, ready to defend her, but she held the brunette back.
"Come on, Hangman. I'll kick your ass no problem. Pick your team and let's fight."
"Ohhoooo, Sweetheart. I'll take that bet. Alright, pretty girl. I'll go easy on you. You can have Rooster and whoever else you pick. You can even pick first."
"Careful, Bagman. I don't think your reputation could sink any further by losing than it already has."
"Then put your money where your mouth is, honey. Make your bet."
"I'm not sucking your dick."
"Come on, guys. Stop fighting and let's play." Fanboy begged with a roll of his eyes.
"Yeah, we're here to have fun. It's not that big 'a deal." Fritz followed behind Fanboy, also annoyed at the fight that was brewing.
Both Hangman and Sweetheart dropped the argument for now, but both of them knew it wasn't over. However, Fanboy and Fritz were right. Today was a fun day, and they were all determined to kick back and relax. Everyone split into two teams: Sweetheart, Phoenix, Rooster, Halo, Fanboy, and Bob on one team. Hangman, Coyote, Fritz, Yale, Harvard, and Payback on another. The game was simple -first team to break through the other's defense three times, or whoever got three tackles first would be the winner.
The first round started off with Rooster holding the football, eventually passing it off to Fanboy when he started getting boxed in by Hangman, Fritz, and Yale. Fanboy ended up getting tackled by Harvard and Coyote. The second round had Coyote taking the ball, passing it off to Payback, who passed it off to Harvard. Harvard got to running, ready to elbow through the barricade that Bob, Phoenix, and Halo formed. Sweetheart and Rooster chased after him, reaching out to grasp at him and yank him back until he fell to the ground.
Round three was quick. Sweetheart had the ball and she told Rooster to go long. Rooster ran past everyone, getting to the fake end zone where Sweetheart threw the ball as far as she could. He ended up catching it, scoring the touchdown. And then round four was where it all went wrong. Payback took the ball. He decided to hog it and just brute force his way through the defense. Sweetheart ran behind him, attempting to get a tackle. But she was side swiped by Hangman who just bull slammed her to the ground. She fell onto her shoulder, and she felt something pop.
"FUCK! FUCK GOD DAMN IT!" she wailed out, getting a mouthful of sand as she writhed on the ground.
"What the fuck is wrong with you, dude?!" Rooster angrily slapped at Hangman before rushing to his friend's side. Phoenix knelt to the ground beside her, quickly assessing the damage. And then Captain Mitchell rushed to aid.
"Something popped! Holy shit it hurts!" Sweetheart hissed out.
"Come on, let's get you sitting." Maverick said and both Rooster and Phoenix carefully helped Sweetheart to her butt. She cried out through clenched teeth as the pain radiated down her entire left side.
"Oooooh that doesn't look good." Sweetheart heard Bob whisper out.
"Damn, Hangman. Someone needs anger management classes." Payback had said, and whether or not that was meant to be a joke, Sweetheart didn't take kindly to it.
"Everyone shut the fuck up!"
"You'll be alright." Maverick tried to calm her. "Easy fix. Just take a deep breath." he instructed her as he splayed his palm against her shoulder blade.
Sweetheart braced herself, taking a deep breath like he said, and giving her free hand to Rooster so she could hold onto something in case she passes out. Maverick counted to three, and then shoved the bone back into its socket. Sweetheart cursed to the high heavens when he did that. Pain engulfed her and nausea threatened to consume her. When he told her that everything was back in place, she fell to her back to try and ground herself so she didn't black out.
"That was not cool, man." she heard Coyote say. And when Coyote goes against his own friend, you know Hangman really fucked up. But Hangman didn't seem to think so.
"I'm just playing the game." he chuckled out arrogantly. "Maybe it's best she left the Navy. She can't handle a little tackle football, how is she gonna handle a fighter jet?"
"Bite me, asshole!" she spit at him, wobbling as she got to her feet and readied herself for an actual physical fight.
"Only because you asked oh so nicely, darlin."
"You're real conceited for someone who got one achievement and made it your entire personality! You're just a shit pilot and are trying to cover it up!"
"Between the two of us, which one is still a pilot?" he calmly responded, an ugly smirk plastering his fucking face.
Sweetheart lunged at him, only getting millimeters from him as Rooster held her back. But Phoenix was ready to back her up as she too swiped a fist at him. But Fanboy held her back as well.
"I'll take you outta the sky any day! You're garbage! You couldn't keep up even if we gave you a head start!" claimed Sweetheart.
"Alright! Everyone! Calm down!" yelled Maverick. "That's an order!"
Everyone halted their motions, one by one taking a deep breath and relaxing themselves until the threat of physical violence was no longer a main concern. Rooster still had a hold on her, and Fanboy on Phoenix, but they got shrugged off as the two women made their way into each other's space. And then Maverick caught everyone's attention, but his focus was only on Sweetheart.
"You're a pilot?" he merely asked her. Sweetheart straightened up when he addressed her. Call it force of habit. She ignored the thumping of pain in her shoulder.
"Yes, Sir. I was, Sir."
"Name?" he asked her, and she freely gave it. Former rank, call sign, all of it. "And your service record?"
"I am a TOPGUN graduate. Former WSO for Lieutenant Trace and The Black Aces in Afghanistan. Been stationed all over the East Coast since I was eighteen."
"WSO?" he eyed between the two women curiously. "Are you supposed to be here, Lieutenant."
"I'm not a Lieutenant anymore, Sir. But I did get the call back. I declined it."
"Why?"
"Personal reasons."
"She didn't make the cut. She just won't admit it." taunted Hangman, which riled her up once more. She tried to take a swing at him but was intercepted once more by Rooster.
"I'll leave you in the dust, Bagman! Phoenix and I could take you down before you could finish saying goodbye to your mommy!"
"You wanna bet?!" he spat back.
"I said that's enough!" yelled Maverick once more. He stepped between to two of them, acting as a barrier to prevent any more fighting. "If you really want to take each other on, do it in the air!"
"With pleasure, Sir." Hangman grinned sickeningly. "I will happily take them down."
"I second the motion." chimed Phoenix with an equally sickening tone.
"Alright, everyone calm down." Rooster tried to be the middle man. "We'll talk about this later."
He began to pull both Sweetheart and Phoenix away from the scene, attempting to calm them down as much as he could. Once the three of them were far enough away, they all let out an exasperated sigh and relaxed the tense muscles they hadn't realized were knotted up.
"I really wanna punch him in the face." Sweetheart muttered.
"Trust me, I do too." replied Phoenix.
"Why'd you have to make that stupid bet with him?" asked Rooster. "You do realize that if you don't actually take him up in the air, he's never going to let it go."
"Relax. I doubt the Captain will allow me on base to actually fight him."
"I dunno. Maverick seemed pretty serious about it." said Phoenix.
"Oh please. I'm not even part of the mission. I'm pretty sure unauthorized personnel on sight would be literally kicked out." she tried to wave them off, but her shoulder was still throbbing so she dropped her hand.
"Can we just forget about it? I don't wanna think about Bagman anymore. Not when we have this day to ourselves." begged the brunette pilot.
She was right, so the three of them agreed to put the last ten minutes behind them and continue on with their day like it didn't happen. Sweetheart's recent injury put a stop to any plans they may have had to go swimming, so they opted to just wade in the water for a little while before heading up the beach to grab something to eat. After a quick lunch, Rooster split to give the two women some alone time, which was greatly appreciated.
They enjoyed being able to actually have time with each other after all these years. It made Sweetheart realize that she didn't give Phoenix enough credit as a girlfriend. Being without her the last two years was miserable. And she was positive that had she just been honest about what happened, the present day would be completely different. Maybe she would've stayed in the Navy. Maybe she would've gone back to The Black Aces with Phoenix after graduation.
There was no point in dwelling on the past. The only thing they could do now was rebuild what they lost. And, so far, it was working out perfectly. They walked down memory lane for a little while, revisiting old spots. Then they went back to the water to cool off as the sun got even hotter throughout the afternoon. One game of water tag, a few sandcastles, and a deep tan later, they called it a day and went to go grab dinner at a little seafood diner spot not too far off from the beach. They shared some shrimp, had a few drinks, and Sweetheart even treated her girl to some cheesecake for dessert.
And then Phoenix got the dreaded text message from Rooster that let her know everyone was heading back to base and to meet up with them.
"You gotta go?"
"Yeah." she sighed reluctantly.
"I'll walk you back to the beach. I don't wanna say goodbye yet."
"Awe, you're cute." Phoenix lovingly pinched at her cheek like a mother would her child. Despite Sweetheart slapping her hand away, she couldn't help the blush that painted her face.
They walked back down the beach hand-in-hand. Fingers entwined just a little bit tighter as the shore came into view. Today was a good day, and Sweetheart was already discussing plans on the next time they can get together, much to Phoenix's enjoyment. The brunette kept saying how adorable she was when she was excited.
The group of pilots were visible now. All huddled together around their Captain as he talked to them about something. Hangman responded back, his arrogance clear on his face even from all the way back here. Rooster was annoyed and rolled his eyes. As the two women got closer, they captured the others' attention.
"Didn't think you'd have the balls to show up." Hangman was first to speak. Sweetheart took a deep breath to prevent herself from literally spitting in his face.
"Enough, Lieutenant." Maverick put a stop to it before it could start. "Phoenix, we're heading back. Sweetheart? I'll be seeing you tomorrow morning. Eight am sharp."
"Wait, what?" Sweetheart uttered in surprise and confusion.
"You can back out now if you wanna. I won't hold it against you, swear it." Hangman faux promised, holding his hand up in a scout's honor that everyone knew he wouldn't abide by even if his life depended on it.
"Wait, you're actually serious about letting us fight it out? I'm not a pilot anymore. Surely that breaks some sort of code?" Sweetheart tried to reason with the older man.
"I don't care if you're still active or not. Once a pilot, always a pilot. Besides, it'll be good training for everyone." he responded confidently. "Tomorrow. Eight am. Don't be late."
The Captain walked away, signalling for everyone to follow. They did, but Phoenix stayed back a moment to give Sweetheart a hug and a kiss on the cheek.
"It'll be alright." she soothed. "I'll see you tomorrow. And we'll give Hangman a good beating. You and me." Another hug, and she was off, leaving Sweetheart alone to process what just happened.
Sweetheart had a hard time sleeping that night. She was up tossing and turning, picturing what the day ahead was going to consist of. A huge part of her was a bit terrified. It's been two years since she was in a fighter jet. And on top of it, they bet against Hangman of all people. If this didn't go right, he will use it to abuse both her and Phoenix for the rest of their lives. Why did she have to make that stupid bet? It was the heat of the moment, she didn't mean it!
But when the alarm went off at 06:30 am, she couldn't hide any more. She had an hour and a half to get presentable and make it to base or else..... She didn't have her uniform with her -but then again why would she? She didn't expect to go back to TOPGUN. She was just here for Tasha. And Bradley. She hoped a pair of jeans and a plain shirt would suffice. Besides, she'd be putting on a pilot's suit anyway.
She made sure to pay extra attention to her appearance: she gelled her hair a little bit more, parted it in that way she used to when she was still active, pinned back the stragglers she keeps saying she'll get taken care of but never does. Then she brushed her teeth a little bit longer than usual, straightened her shoe laces before tying them up, and flattened down any wrinkles in her clothes. And then she grabbed her car keys and phone, and headed out of the hotel.
She knew the drive to base very well. She hadn't forgotten it at all. It felt like yesterday she was first here with Tasha. Seeing the gates as she pulled up felt like the first time too.
"Can I help you?" a man stopped her. His name badge said Coleman on it.
"Um, hi. I've been called here by Captain Mitchell." Sweetheart responded.
"You must be Sweetheart, then."
"Yes, Sir."
"He's waiting for you. Go on in."
The gates opened, allowing her in. Coleman told her where to park her car and where to meet Maverick, but she already knew that, and she was able to get her shit together fairly quickly despite panicking hardcore on the inside. Walking towards the hangar didn't help one bit, and seeing everyone anxiously huddled and looking around didn't help either. She caught Phoenix's eyes -the woman smiling widely at her appearance- and found herself relaxing slightly. Tasha always calmed her.
Phoenix ran her way, meeting her in the middle, and throwing her arms around her shoulders.
"I was afraid you'd back out." she whispered in her ear.
"I almost did. Honestly? I feel like puking." Sweetheart responded back.
"You'll be fine. There's nothing you and I can't do."
"It's not about not being able to do it. It's more like if we don't beat Hangman, it'll be the end of our careers. Or, well, your career and my life."
"No. Don't act like that." she sternly pointed a finger. "We'll kick his ass and make him cry. He deserves it."
"I'll do my best, Lieutenant." Sweetheart playfully saluted, making the brunette laugh. They then walked back to the group, ready to face the music.
Hangman didn't even try to hide his arrogance. He was twirling that ugly toothpick like he always does, the whites of his teeth shining behind his lips as he smiled over the wood. Sweetheart hated when he did that. The toothpick was a stupid signature trademark of his. It didn't make sense to her. He probably thought it made him look tough, but really it just made him look like even more of an asshole than he already was.
"You ready to lose, darlin'?"
Exhibit A.
"I hope we get your defeat on camera, Bagman. I want to replay it every night before I go to sleep." Phoenix was quick to retort. Her comment did little, if any, to deter him.
"Alright, everyone take a seat. We'll do a quick rundown on the course and then you'll get in your jets.." Maverick interrupted.
No one argued against him and took their seats in the makeshift classroom in the center of the hangar. Everyone appeared to be sitting with their wingman -as evident by the fact that Phoenix was sandwiched in between Bob and Sweetheart. Sweetheart, her former WSO. Bob, her current one.
"Alright. You guys have had your practice with dogfighting. But that skill is reserved for an as-needed situation. Your main goal is to simply navigate." Maverick began to explain, bringing up a holographic layout of a mountainous terrain. "The terrain is hidden in a canyon range, guarded by surface-to-air missiles. Your task will be to navigate below these SAMs along the canyon with a max ceiling of one hundred feet." he said so casually, but both Sweetheart and Phoenix shared an oh shit look with each other. No way this guy was serious. One hundred feet? In an F-18? That was suicide!
"He's not serious?" Sweetheart muttered to Phoenix, but her doubt was heard loud and clear.
"Oh, I'm very serious." said Maverick, looking directly at her. "But because this is just a training session, I'll go easy on you. You will not exceed a max ceiling of three hundred feet. You will not have to worry about dodging any missiles. All you have to do it navigate this canyon and take out a marked target on the ground. You'll have three minutes to complete this course. Exceed three minutes, you lose. Go above three hundred feet, you lose. Any questions?"
"Yeah, I don't have a WSO. A little unfair, don't ya think?" Hangman quipped with a hand raised like he was in grade school again. Maverick didn't answer, instead passing the reins to the two women who merely exchanged a silent look. Phoenix shrugged. Sweetheart quirked an eyebrow. Phoenix twitched her lips. And then Sweetheart shrugged.
"We'll be nice and let you choose your own WSO." answered Phoenix.
"Alright.... Fanboy."
"Dude, really?" whined said WSO. He pouted like a child.
"Shut up, dude. You'll have nothing to worry about because we'll win. Easily."
"Yeah, I just don't like you." Fanboy rolled his eyes.
"Are we all in agreement?" spoke Maverick. Another round of glances was exchanged, and everyone nodded. "Good. Go suit up."
At the dismissal, everyone stood from their seats. Phoenix led Sweetheart to a set of lockers, pulling out a couple of flight suits and handing her one. Sweetheart eyed it cautiously. She couldn't help but remember the last time she wore one of these, and the reason why she stopped.
"Hey, look at me." Phoenix cooed, using a finger under her chin to raise her eyes. "What's going on?"
"I've been gone for two years. And my first time back I'm having to fight against Hangman over a stupid bet."
"You doubt yourself?"
"Is it shameful to say a little bit?" she questioned guiltily.
"No. But I know you. And I know you're the best damn WSO I've ever had. You've taken down targets half blind. You've taken down targets without a targeting system. If there's anyone that could do this with me, it'd be you." she soothed. The finger under her chin had migrated to her hair, plucking a stray that Sweetheart somehow missed with the gel.
"But it's been years. What if I mess up?"
"You won't. It's like riding a bike, once you get up in the air, it'll come back to you. And if we lose this bet, so what? It's not the end of the world. Who cares if Hangman makes fun of us for losing?"
"But what if this ruins your chances for being on this mission? What if I screw it up for you?"
"If it does, it does. I don't wanna be on this mission if you won't be with me anyway." the woman claimed. Sweetheart doubted her words, knowing full well that Lieutenant Natasha Trace lived and breathed for the skies. Being grounded was like clipping a bird's wings -cruel. But, even still, the words comforted her. And maybe for a moment she could believe that this woman would risk a job for her.
"So you won't be mad at me if I miss the target?" Sweetheart smiled softly.
"I promise. Now come on. Suit up." she tossed the flight suit at her and then began to pull her own on.
Sweetheart followed her lead and dressed. Then she took her hand and followed her outside where the F-18s were. Hangman and Fanboy were outside already dressed, standing by Hangman's engraved fighter jet. Phoenix's -and Bob's- were beside his. Everyone was gathered around, ready for the fight.
"How about we make this bet worthwhile?" came Hangman's grating voice. It rattled Sweetheart's ears and made her grimmace.
"What'chu got?" prompted Phoenix.
"Double the pushups." spoke Fanboy. Sweetheart had to rack her brain for what that meant. Double the pushups? And then she remembered what Phoenix told her when they first talked. Payback had bet two hundred pushups for whatever reason, and everyone had to do them. Now double them? Fanboy officially took first place for being the dumbest idiot alive.
"No. That's too easy. Let's spice it up a little bit." Phoenix waved it off. Hangman silently urged her to go on. Sweetheart was also curious as to what the woman had up her sleeve. "If we win, we get to dress you up and parade you around like a showgirl."
"What?!" both Sweetheart and Fanboy cried out incredulously.
"No way! I don't want any part of this!" said Fanboy.
"Relax!" yelled Hangman. "We've got nothing to worry about."
"Dude, I'm not risking my reputation like that."
"Don't worry, Fanboy. This punishment only applies to Bagman." said Phoenix. This made Hangman scoff out.
"That's not fair! What's to stop him from sabotaging me? He's gotta take it too."
"You picked him yourself. You saying you can't trust your own WSO?" challenged Rooster with a shit-eating grin.
"Not when he has nothing at stake!"
"You can back out of this bet now if you want, dick-head." pushed the brunette pilot. She crossed her arms over her chest, seemingly confident that they already won without even trying. It was silent for a moment as Hangman pondered it.
"If we lose, we both take the punishment." he reiterated. Fanboy's eyes bugged, unbelieving at what he was hearing. He threw a look at Sweetheart, hoping that she'd speak up and say something to save him
Fanboy was a good friend to Sweetheart. He's never done anything to her to warrant that type of embarrassment. She didn't want to punish him. She tried to tell him as such without actually saying any words. She used her fingers to cross over her heart, letting him know that she held him in good graces and wouldn't punish him. He seemed to understand and nod along.
"Fine. I'm in." he relented.
"Good." Hangman sighed with relief. "But, when we win, we get to dress you up and you have to be our personal showgirls."
This made Sweetheart reel with worry. No way Phoenix would actually agree to that! She wouldn't put Sweetheart in that position! Not after all the harassment Hangman has been directing at her for her entire military career. Not after the actual sexual assault she had to deal with. No, she wouldn't do that.
"Deal." Phoenix spoke.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" Sweetheart angrily directed towards the woman. "You did not just agree to that?"
"It'll be okay. Do you trust me?"
"You just sold us out to Hangman!"
"We're not gonna lose. Why am I the only one that believes that?"
"She's right." came Rooster, idling up beside them. "I know you'll win. And maybe this will knock Hangman down a few pegs. It's about time someone shows him up."
"I don't like this." muttered Sweetheart.
"Hangman and Fanboy will run the course first. We'll all be keeping watch and monitoring your flight path. Remember, your ceiling is three hundred feet, and your time limit is three minutes." reminded Maverick.
"Might as well stay out here, because we'll be back before you know it." taunted Hangman. He spit his stupid toothpick to the ground and then ordered Fanboy to the jet. They got in, got all buckled up, and did a quick rundown on the equipment to make sure everything worked. When they gave the okay signal, the runway was cleared in preparation for takeoff.
Maverick ordered everyone else back in the hangar where their jet was pinged on the holographic map. Maverick pulled out a mic, speaking into it to test the two-way communication. When that was all good, Maverick gave full control over to Hangman.
"Once you're in the air and hit one hundred feet, your timer will start." he spoke. "Runway is all clear for takeoff. Comms are all yours."
"Noted. Fanboy, how we looking on the weapons systems?"
"Targeting system up and active." he replied.
"Copy. Let's get this over with. I can't wait for this to all be over with." Sweetheart could hear the smirk painting his lips and it made her roll her eyes. But, secretly, her heart was thumping.
She watched as Hangman navigated the jet towards the end of the runway and then make a smooth takeoff into the air. Immediately, all eyes were watching the monitor. the F-18 reached one hundred feet in a span of seconds, and the timer at the top began counting. The makeshift terrain had spawned around the marker meant to be Hangman and Fanboy.
Hangman and Fanboy kept each other updated every few seconds. Their communication was heard loud and clear in the hangar. Hangman was so confident in himself, claiming they were making great time, that he cracked a few jokes. Sweetheart wanted to laugh at him, but he was in fact making great time. She looked at the timer and saw they've only been in the air for a minute, and they were pretty much halfway through the course.
Sweetheart chewed on her thumb, wanting desperately to cry. She hoped their aircraft would suffer some sort of failure, making them drop from the course and get eliminated. But then she remembered Garcia was in the jet as well, and she didn't want any harm to come to him. She felt bad for thinking like that and reprimanded herself in her head. Even still, the bad thoughts did nothing to quell her fear of losing.
Two minutes. They were in the air for two minutes and Hangman was already claiming that they were approaching the target and for Fanboy to ready the missile strike.
"Targeting system engaged." he spoke, just rambling off the updates. "I've got a lock. Bring us in closer." he instructed his pilot.
"We've got one shot at this. Don't screw it up." he spat back.
"Gee, I was thinking how I could fuck us over. But now that you mention it, I've changed my ways!" he sarcastically replied. If there was room in the aircraft, and time for him to do so, Sweetheart was positive he would've dramatically shrugged his shoulders and slapped his forehead for emphasis.
"Just drop the missile!" Hangman was tired of the jokes.
"Bring us in closer and I will."
"Fucking drop it!"
"The targeting system needs us to be closer if we want to make direct contact!"
"Fine! I'll get closer! But if you miss the window and overshoot, it'll be your own fault!"
"I won't overshoot!"
The marker for the jet rapidly approached the target. Just as they were about to fly overhead of it, Fanboy dropped the missile. A new marker on the monitor appeared as it tracked the missile. It landed just short of the target, but at least it wasn't an overshot. Fanboy was close. He had waited just half a second longer, he might've been dead on.
Once the missile was dropped, Maverick ordered them back to the runway. They had landed just a moment later. Despite missing the target, both men were rather happy with their run. And as Sweetheart and Phoenix passed him while they made their way to their jet, he shouldered Sweetheart and knocked her to the side. She caught herself before she tripped over her feet, but bit her tongue. Now was not the time to focus on him. She needed to focus on the course.
The two of them got in the jet, buckled in, and went over their equipment. Sweetheart was using a loner helmet from Halo. The other WSO had told her to kick Hangman's ass as she handed it off, claiming she's only known the male pilot for a couple of days but already hated his guts.
"Comm test. You copy?" she heard Phoenix's voice in her ear.
"Copy. You hear me?"
"Loud and clear. How's the weapons system functioning?" she asked and Sweetheart took a moment to fiddle with the multitude of buttons surrounding her. It took a second for her to remember what button did what, but she managed and she flicked the system to life.
"Up and functional."
"How are you feeling about this?" the brunette asked, a little less Lieutenant-y and a little more girlfriend-y. Sweetheart took an audible deep breath.
"Nervous."
"Hey, look at me." Phoenix turned to peer behind the seat. "No matter what happens, I still love you, okay? If we lose this bet, and Hangman turns us into his sick fantasy, I won't blame you. But we won't lose, because I'll fly us faster than the speed of light, and you'll hit that target dead on. You and I haven't failed a mission yet, and we're not gonna start now."
"Can I least have a moment to re-familiarize myself with the buttons? It's been two fucking years, Tasha. And I'm a little scared."
"Our timer doesn't start until we hit a hundred feet and Maverick didn't say we had to takeoff immediately. I'm not moving until you tell me to."
"Okay."
Feeling a little better knowing Phoenix was giving her all the time she needed, Sweetheart began pressing buttons she was confident wouldn't just drop the missile on the runway. Okay, what does this button do? And this one? she asked herself as she pressed stuff and watched to see what they did. One button brought up the course. Another button activated the target lock. She knew for a fact that this button was to drop the missile, so she left it alone.
"Alright. Let's get this over with." Sweetheart muttered.
"You ready?" Phoenix asked for confirmation.
"As ready as I can be."
"Alright, ladies. The runway is clear. Comms are all yours." spoke Maverick.
"Copied." said Phoenix.
"Copied." repeated Sweetheart.
"Tell me when the timer starts." was Phoenix's only order. When Sweetheart agreed, Phoenix took off down the runway.
Feeling the rush of gravity as the aircraft actually pulled off the asphalt and skyrocketed into the sun made Sweetheart's stomach drop to her feet. But in a good way. It was a feeling that took her months to recondition her body to forget when she went civilian. She'd go to bed every night, feeling herself sinking against the imaginary force of gravity that ingrained itself into her brain. And now that she was experiencing it again, she wouldn't be able to forget it a second time.
"We've got countdown!" Sweetheart was brought back to the present when the altitude flashed one hundred feet on her screen.
Phoenix straightened out the nose, keeping it level and underneath the hard ceiling. Seeing the course displayed on a holographic monitor was one thing, but actually being thrown against the sides of the aircraft as Phoenix sharply took each turn was another thing. This wasn't anything new; their time with the Black Aces had prepared her for every fast-paced situation one could think of. But it still took her by surprise when they went through the first turn.
"Skies clear. Course on par with time. You've got another turn in four decimal seven seconds." Sweetheart rattled off. It was second nature to just talk, even if the information wasn't all that important. Phoenix liked being talked to. She hated having a quiet wingman.
She took the turn effortlessly, and Sweetheart watched her monitor ahead of their location, making sure the course was still clear of obstruction and that their pathing was matching up with their marker on the course. She made sure Phoenix was aware of the information.
Sweetheart tried not to look at the timer that was flashing in front of her eyes. She looked at it once, and they had already gone past a minute. She panicked for a moment, because it felt like they were only in the air for ten seconds. She told herself not to look at it again, because it would just make her freeze up and ruin everything. And she was already on edge.
"How far until we reach the target?" Phoenix asked. Sweetheart knew she was aware of where the target was in proximity to their location, but she wanted Sweetheart to talk.
"We've just reached the halfway mark on the course."
"I'm gonna drop us lower, give you a better chance at hitting the target."
"Are you crazy?! Three hundred feet is already pushing it! I don't want us to die for this stupid bet!"
"The mission will have us lower anyway. Might as well give it a shot now."
"Tasha, it's not worth it. Just keep your altitude. I can hit the target from this height."
"Well you better get ready because it's coming up any second now."
"Copy that. Maintain speed. Targeting system up and running. Target locked and-" Sweetheart began to say. Her sentence was cut short when her screen flashed a warning that her targeting system was nonfunctional. Sweetheart messed with the buttons, trying to diagnose the issue, but every time, the screen kept saying the auto-lock wasn't working.
"Talk to me, Sweetheart. What's going on?"
"Targeting system is down! I repeat, targeting system is down!"
"What?! You said it was operational!"
"It was! I can't fix it! I'll have to manually target but you gotta slow down and give me time!"
"I can't slow down! If I drop speed we won't make it in time!" claimed Phoenix, forcing the other woman to look back at the flashing timer. She was right; their time was rapidly approaching the three minute mark and they still hadn't reached the actual target yet.
"I can't hit the target unless you slow down!" Sweetheart repeated the problem.
"You can do it! Just drop the missile!"
"I can't! You need to slow down!"
"We won't make it! You can do it! I believe in you!"
Both women began screaming at each other, both of them giving differing opinions. Sweetheart was adamant that she wasn't skilled for such a low-altitude drop at this speed. Her expertise was dropping bombs from high in the sky. There was too much room for error here. Too much math that needed to be precise for it to work out in their favor. But Phoenix kept saying how there wasn't enough time to slow down. She needed to maintain her speed in order to stay under the three minute mark, which was now almost up and caused Sweetheart's hands to get sweaty and her brain to get foggy on the equations.
"Slow down!" Sweetheart said.
"I can't!" Phoenix replied back just as quickly. "DROP IT!!!" she cried.
"ALRIGHT!!!!"
Sweetheart practically slammed her fist into the button, releasing the missile and sending it hurdling towards Earth. Phoenix took the jet higher into the sky, breaching the three hundred feet ceiling to protect them from the blast. Sweetheart turned as far as she could in their cramped aircraft to watch the explosion cloud up the atmosphere with dust and smoke.
"Holy shit!" she found herself yelling out, like it was the first time she was witnessing this despite that being further from the truth.
"Runway clear for landing. Make your way back immediately." Maverick's voice brought her back to the present.
"Over and out. Runway in sight. Attempting a landing." Phoenix replied. She maneuvered the aircraft back to the runway, smoothly resting the landing gear on the asphalt like she was resting a sleeping baby in its crib. Not a hiccup in the landing. Not so much as a scuff on the wheels. But, then again, Sweetheart never doubted her skills.
Once on the ground, and the F-18 turned off, and the canopy open, Phoenix happily jumped out and got to her feet. Sweetheart on the other hand was still strapped in, eyes glazed over as she mentally tried to bring herself back to Earth. Her head was still in the clouds. She was still reminiscing the feeling of being in the sky. It almost felt like a dream, like she was watching herself in third person and the last three minutes wasn't her actually doing it, but rather controlling a video game character.
"Hey, you okay?" Phoenix asked through the comms, approaching the side of the aircraft and holding out a hand as if she could pull the woman out.
"What? Yeah. Yeah I'm good." Sweetheart shook her head to clear it.
"Come on. Let's get your feet back on the ground."
Phoenix helped Sweetheart out, keeping hands on her waist to hold her steady as she swayed. When she was confident her partner wasn't going to collapse, she helped remove the helmet and smoothed down the hair that pulled out of its neat bun.
"You did it." she whispered, a loving smile breaking out on her face. "You fucking did it."
"I did?"
"Yeah! I told you you would!"
"Haha! You two are fucking insane!" Rooster ran up to the two women, enveloping them in his arms and laughing out his happiness as she shook them. "Holy shit you dropped it without a lock! And hit it! I knew you were good but god damn!"
"I actually hit it?!" Sweetheart's eyes went wide with disbelief.
"Hell yeah you did!"
"Come on, guys. Let's go over the results." ordered Maverick with a wave of his hand.
"Help me walk. My legs feel like jelly." said Sweetheart, making both of her friends laugh.
Phoenix had one arm around her waist, Rooster had one arm linked with hers. The both of them guided her back inside the hangar where she was assaulted with more hugs from everyone else. Including Fanboy. Not really knowing what to do, she handed the helmet back to Halo, muttering a thanks. This made Halo laugh a hearty laugh like it was the funniest joke she's ever heard of in her entire life.
"Alright, everyone. Come on. We'll celebrate later. First let's go over the replays and see who won." repeated the Captain.
Everyone took their seats again, acting like kids in class who were excited for the teachers to bring in pizza for a pizza party. Everyone was leaning forward on their elbows, eagerly awaiting Maverick to say something again. But Sweetheart hid her shaking hands in her lap, trying to hide the fact that she was still pumping with adrenaline. But Tasha noticed. She always does. And she took a hand in hers, intertwining their fingers and giving her palm a squeeze. Sweetheart smiled at her gratefully.
"Alright. Let's make it quick and simple." started Maverick, pulling up replays of both their pathings. "You both stayed below the three hundred foot ceiling. You both made it to the target. Hangman and Fanboy: your time to target was two decimal seventeen decimal forty-seven." he said, making both men cheer with delight. "Phoenix and Sweetheart: time to target was two decimal fifty-three decimal twenty-one."
Hearing the recorded times made the air in Sweetheart's lungs disappear. They barely made it. Had Phoenix sneezed they would've been late........ they lost. Hangman was faster than them. But of fucking course he was. He's known for being one of the fastest pilots in the Navy. That skill is what gave him that air-to-air kill. He was just faster.
Sweetheart and Phoenix turned to each other, their faces solemn and disappointed. They knew that this bet was a mistake, and now they were paying the price for it. Sweetheart shuddered at the image of what Hangman could possibly dress them up in.
"Phoenix and Sweetheart won." said Maverick, and everyone's heads snapped up to look at him with bugged eyes.
"What?!" Hangman jumped to his feet, making the desk screech across the flooring. "We were almost a minute faster! What do you mean they fucking won?!"
"Your only two agreed upon stipulations was one: stay below three hundred feet altitude, and two: reach the target in no more than three minutes. You both met both of those parameters, but it was Sweetheart's dead-on missile drop that pushed them ahead of you. Fanboy was off almost a hundred feet. Had this been the mission, you would've alerted the enemy at the airstrike, giving them time to fight back. And then it's a dogfight."
"And she did it without a targeting system!" reminded Rooster with a shit-eating grin.
"I knew she would do it. I never doubted her for a second." Phoenix prided herself, giving Sweetheart a one-armed hug and holding her into her side.
"You're fucking kidding me!"
"Sit down, pretty boy. You'll need your energy for the show you're gonna be putting on for everyone tonight." taunted the brunette pilot. Hangman wanted to sneer at her. He wanted to curse her out, fist fight her right here right now. But everyone was witness to the bet. Everyone heard them agree on the conditions. He couldn't get out of it.
"Screw this!" he yelled, storming out of the hangar and head hung low in shame.
Rooster coughed out a 'loser' behind his back. Whether or not Hangman heard it was irrelevant as everyone else heard it and they all laughed. Maybe seeing Maverick crack a smile and try to hide it was what Sweetheart needed to see. Once Hangman was gone from sight, that was when the celebration started. Everyone once again jumped to their feet to circle around the women.
"About time Hangman got a taste of his own medicine." Bob happily rocked on the balls of his feet.
"He was seriously starting to piss me off." commented Halo again. "Bet he'll keep his ego in check from now on."
"Not yet. First we have to get him all nice and pretty." reminded Phoenix, elbowing Sweetheart with a knowing smirk. She grinned back.
"Oh yeah, don't remind me...." Fanboy grimaced and shuddered. "Please be nice to me. I'm a good friend to you guys." he dramatically begged.
"Relax, Garcia. The punishment still stands for just Jake. You're clear." Sweetheart consoled, a hand on his shoulder.
"Oh thank god!" he huffed out.
"Don't let him hear that. He'll throw another tantrum." chuckled Rooster. "Actually, now that I think about it, get it tattooed on his forehead. That way he's always reminded of it."
"Now that's an idea!" agreed Phoenix.
"Nope. That was not the agreed upon punishment." spoke Maverick, acting like a parent scolding their child.
"You're no fun." said Phoenix.
"I let you guys do this, didn't I?"
Sweetheart and Phoenix shared a look that said he wasn't wrong. They shrugged and rolled their eyes. They'll punish Hangman one way or another. All they have to do is brainstorm how badly they want him to hurt. Phoenix was thinking an old-school Rockette or maybe a Pinup Girl. Sweetheart had the idea of finding the ugliest, trashiest Halloween costume and putting it on him.
"Everyone take a quick break. Let Lieutenant Seresin calm down. We'll pick up training later."
With everyone in agreement, they all split off to go do whatever they wanted for the next few minutes. Sweetheart took the free time to head back out onto the runway and inspect the F-18. She wanted to know why the targeting system failed on her. But, also, she couldn't help but feel drawn to the aircraft. All she ever wanted to do was fly. She remembered seeing the military recruiters come to her high school on career day. She was only fourteen years old at the time, and before that she had never given the military a single thought. But for some reason, she wanted to talk to them, get more information.
Of course the recruiters glorified what they actually did, making it seem like you're not actually risking your life for it. But she wasn't stupid. She knew the Army was tough. The Marines as well. Hell, she couldn't even do a pull up when they told her to get on the bar. It was embarrassing as all hell. And even though they didn't laugh and instead just told her to work on it and she could do anything, she couldn't help but walk away from them in shame. When she walked by the Navy booth, they stopped her to talk to her.
Her ignorance of what the Navy actually did made her try to weasel her way out of it. 'Sorry, I don't like water' she said. They told her they do more than station on boats. They fly aircrafts. They fight in the skies. She thought that was what the Air Force did. The Air Force does fly planes, they said, but unlike the Air Force, when they're in the skies they're fighting. Whereas the Air Force will do a lot of basic cargo transportation.
Transporting cargo didn't seem like fun. Dropping bombs from a plane did. She talked with the Navy recruiters some more. They had already seen her fail at the pullups, but they asked her to do some other physical tests like pushups and stretches. She didn't completely make a fool out of herself, so they handed her some pamphlets that detailed salaries and benefits and outlined the tasks they did, and she carried on with her day.
Something inside her clicked. 'This is what I want to do' she said and she began to work on herself so she could get there. Her high school didn't have a Naval ROTC, just an Army one, so she just took a lot of physical education classes to bulk up and get her strength. She studied hardcore for the ACT and SAT so she could pass with flying colors and get accepted into an NROTC college. Once she got there, she applied for a Navy scholarship and focused her concentration on an aviation career.
Graduating with a job as a pilot was the happiest day of her life. And now here she was: a TOPGUN graduate with over ten years of experience under her belt. She was the best of the best. She was a decorated pilot with highly ambitious recognition. She loved it. Being gone for the last two years was heartbreaking. She missed the skies. But her fear of what happened to her overruled her love for aviation. It wasn't fair. And she was no longer going to let it overrule her life.
"You're thinking hard about something." she heard Phoenix approach her.
"I'm thinking about how I got here. It feels like just yesterday I was training to join the Navy. And then I blinked and now I'm a TOPGUN graduate." she replied.
"Time just races when you've got a good wingman by your side." Phoenix nudged her.
"True, but I've also been thinking about the last two years I was gone. When my situation finally dawned on me and I made the decision to leave the Navy, I was angry with myself. I was angry that I let my fear ruin my life and my career. I worked so hard to get where I was and I just gave it up."
"You didn't just give it up." consoled Phoenix. "You had every reason to leave. You were taken advantage of. Our XO had a rope around you. You did what you had to do."
"I keep asking myself if I could've done something differently." she spoke, finally turning to face the other woman. Phoenix stayed calm, but her eyes showed her pity. Sweetheart hated it.
"What's done is done. There's no changing what happened. You can only go forward, and I'll be here to help you. I miss you, a lot. I miss having you as my wingman, I miss being up in the air with you behind me, I miss being able to hold your hand whenever I want." on queue, she took Sweetheart's hand. "You and I were meant to be a team. We work so well together. I want you to come back. Maybe it's too late for this mission, but it's not too late to re-enlist."
"I don't even know where to begin with that. I begged to be let go. When we graduated TOPGUN, it was expected that I would go back to work and apply for a promotion. I had stipulations attached to me. I had to jump through hoops to drop them and go home." she explained, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. But she wouldn't let them. No more crying. She's done enough crying.
"We'll figure it out. Maybe Maverick can put in a good word for you."
"Maybe Maverick will." speak of the devil. Both women turned to see him approaching them. "I looked into your service record. You've got quite the list of accomplishments."
"Thank you, Sir. But I can't take all the credit; Lieutenant Trace and I have been a team for so long, that our service records are almost identical." she motioned to the woman in question, happy to share the glory.
"Can I ask again why you decided to retire so early?"
"Personal reasons, Sir." she repeated. "I was being coerced by a higher up. He took advantage of me and I couldn't handle it anymore."
"I see....." he trailed off. "You impressed me today. If I could get you a way back in, would you accept it?"
"I would need to go back to training...."
"That can be arranged."
"And, if it's not pushing my luck, I would like to be Phoenix's WSO again."
"I'm sure The Black Aces would accept you back without issue. But that would be up to them. I can only promise a good word."
"Come on, take it!" Phoenix urged her quietly. "We'll figure everything else out later!"
Sweetheart and Phoenix stared at each other for a moment, having a silent conversation. Well, it wasn't much of a conversation -more so Phoenix telling her what to do.
"What would I have to do, Sir?"
"Do you have a uniform?"
"Not with me. All my stuff is back home. I didn't plan on re-enlisting when I came here."
"Go home, get your stuff, and get back here ASAP. We'll get you started on some of the basics and work our way from there."
"Yes, SIr!" she gaped. "Thank you!"
Maverick smiled at her and walked away, leaving the women there with their jaws halfway to the floor. And then they jumped and squealed like school girls.
"I told you!" claimed Phoenix, throwing her arms around sweetheart.
"I can't believe this is actually happening." muttered Sweetheart. "I gotta get home. I gotta get my stuff!"
"Not yet, first we have to punish Hangman." she reminded. "We'll let that be your send off."
"I have to thank you for pushing me to do this. If it wasn't for this stupid bet, I wouldn't be standing here with the opportunity to get back in. And we wouldn't be punishing Hangman."
"Well, truthfully, I did it for me." she admitted. "I can't stand the new WSO I was given in The Black Aces. He annoys the shit outta me. And Bob is nice, but he's not you. His spot should've been for you. It was for you. He was probably called in last minute when you declined."
"I'm sorry I left you hanging. And forced you to adapt to a new wingman."
"It's alright. It's all fixed now. Because Maverick is gonna help you get back out there. And I'm gonna be your advocate however I can." she promised.
Phoenix loosely wrapped her arms around Sweetheart's neck, locking her in and holding her close. Sweetheart instinctively held onto her waist in kind. They looked at each other, slowly pacing themselves as they tested the waters. But they both desperately wanted to jump each other right here right now. The two years apart did nothing to quench their desire for each other. Despite the anger that Phoenix held over those two years, not knowing the truth, she still thought about Sweetheart. It was hard to forget her.
As if they could read each other's mind, they leaned in slowly until their lips finally connected. They fit together like puzzle pieces. They molded against each other like no time had passed since their last kiss. Phoenix stuck her tongue out, parting Sweetheart's lips and allowing her entrance. Their tongues danced around each other in the familiar way they always did. It was sweet. It was soft and slow. Despite the deep longing they had for each other, they were conscious enough to remember their environment and not do something they'll end up regretting.
The kiss felt like it lasted a lifetime. By the time they pulled away, it felt like they had stopped breathing ages ago. They both huffed, trying to get the air back in their lungs.
"God I've missed you." Sweetheart found herself saying. It wasn't meant to be funny, but Phoenix laughed anyway.
"You do realize that I'm never letting you slip through my fingers again, right?"
"I wouldn't put it past you to handcuff me."
"Only if you ask nicely." she winked. This time, Sweetheart laughed out.
"Is that a promise? You already let me down by not bringing rope to the beach."
"I couldn't fit it in my bag." she joked. Maybe.
"Get a bigger bag."
"Or I could just tie you up right now."
"Hmmm. As much as I would love that, you've got more training. And I don't think it's a good idea to miss that after the Captain was so gracious to help us out." she hummed, making Phoenix groan.
"I hate that you're right."
"We'll have time later. You go on. I've got a plane to book." Sweetheart pecked her lips once more, then pushed her back into the hangar. Sweetheart pulled out her cell phone and checked for the earliest flight out of California.
Sweetheart was ready for her send off. After training for the day was complete, Phoenix and Sweetheart ordered everyone to The Hard Deck for Hangman's punishment. Maverick left with a threat that he better honor the bet, and Hangman reluctantly agreed to it.
Phoenix and Sweetheart had grabbed all of the supplies they needed to make him the prettiest girl they ever did see. They did his makeup, put a wig on him, and forced his fat ass into a pair of booty shorts. The entire time, the women were laughing. Hangman was trying to fight against it, but they forced him regardless. With their masterpiece complete, they drug him to The Hard Deck. Phoenix waited outside with him while Sweetheart entered the busy establishment and gathered everyone's attention. She stood on a table and whistled out so everyone could turn their gaze to her. The gaggle of pilots in one corner of the bar were eager to see what was to come next. The other patrons in the bar, and Penny, were just confused.
"Allow me to present tonight's entertainment, courtesy of the United States Navy, Lieutenant Jasmine Seresin!" she announced, and Phoenix yanked on Hangman's arm to bring him in full view of everyone.
Everyone, and she means everyone had cheered him on. They caught onto the joke fairly quickly, people already pulling out dollar bills and handing it to him as he was pulled center 'stage' and forced onto a table. Rooster messed with the jukebox to put on a raunchy song for Hangman to shake his ass to. And shake it he did. Despite the rage evident on his face, he put his all into his impromptu table dance.
People gathered around him, trying to shove dollar bills into his way-too-small jean booty shorts. What couldn't fit, was just left on the table. Sweetheart could see from the corner of her eye Penny resting her face in her hands on the bar top. Did anyone even tell her what was happening? Or was she just as surprised as the patrons when Jake Seresin entered her bar looking like this?
The older woman was too embarrassed to raise her head, but Sweetheart didn't pay her much attention, instead focusing on the lovely dancer she and Phoenix put together. Fanboy came to hand them some beers.
"Thanks for sparing me from this!" he thanked, giving them a one-armed hug.
"Remember this, though. Don't piss us off or else you'll be the next one on the table." threatened Sweetheart.
"I give a Scout's Honor I will never double cross you." he held up his hand in said honor and crossed his heart.
At the end of the song, Hangman was ready to jump down and end his punishment, but the other aviators weren't ready to let him go so soon. Rooster played another song on the jukebox, and the gaggle of pilots circled around him, whooping and hollering for him to dance some more.
This was the send off Sweetheart needed: a good laugh, some beers, and a girlfriend by her side. She didn't expect any of this to happen when she risked it all to face the woman she abandoned two years ago. She was fully prepared to be yelled at, maybe slapped a few times, and told to never show her face ever again. But she got the opposite. Everything worked out in her favor. And maybe it was just dumb luck, or maybe it was the universe trying to tell her something, but she wasn't going to let this go to waste. She was going to take full advantage of it. Like Tasha said, when they're together, they can face the world.
Omfg you write fics for Top Gun?! Is there gonna be a part 2 to Sweetheart? I NEED a part 2! And more Rooster! More Rooster is good!
Lmao you can thank my mom for getting me into Top Gun. She is the original fangirl who got me into the movie as a kid because she thirsted hard-core over Maverick and Goose. And we went to see the sequel in theaters together because it was my turn to thirst over the men (and women). If only she knew just how deeply it affected me.
As for a part 2 to Call Sign: Sweetheart, I didn't plan on making it a multi-chapter fic. I honestly don't know where I'd take it if I did make another part. But if you guys want it, I'm happy to oblige. Phoenix does things to me. And so does Rooster.
Relationship(s): Lt. Natasha "Phoenix" Trace/Original Female Character
Words: 5,791
Warnings: Non-con/rape (mentioned)
Summary: When Phoenix is invited back to TOPGUN, she runs into an old flame that brings up memories she tried so hard to forget. But things aren't always what they seem.
Phoenix had been a real bitch since she stepped through the bar doors. But, then again, Rooster always knew her as a bitch. For as long as he could remember, Phoenix gave him the cold shoulder, and promptly pushed everyone else away. At first, he let it slide, but now it was getting to be a real pain in the ass.
She had a mouth on her too. Her filter never worked and half the time she couldn't take criticism. Rooster wondered if her big mouth was ever accounted for when the invitations to TOPGUN were handed out. She was a damn good pilot. Rooster would never deny that. But her attitude problem got her into a lot of trouble when they were just trainees.
Phoenix got herself a drink, seemingly unenthusiastic to be sitting with her fellow pilots. Hangman, well, no one really liked him. Coyote wasn't much different, although Rooster would much rather prefer his company over Hangman's. Fanboy and Payback? Rooster didn't work much with them before, so he couldn't attest as to why they were getting the side eye. Bob was a little odd, but he seemed like a rather nice guy. Yet even he wasn't received well by Phoenix. Rooster had to bite back the retort on his tongue when Phoenix merely grunted out a half-assed greeting and slammed herself down into a chair by the pool table. She kicked her feet up and drank.
"I guess they just let anyone in, huh." smirked Hangman, directing his insult towards the woman.
"Considering your greatest achievement is taking down a metaphorical dinosaur, I'd say anything is possible." Phoenix snapped back.
"Phoenix, please. Not today." Rooster quietly begged, already feeling the headache forming.
"Can it, Rooster. No one asked you." she sneered at him. Rooster just left it at that.
"Am I missing something? Why is she so angry?" Bob questioned. Oh, poor innocent Bob. Rule number one: never ask Phoenix what the fuck is wrong with her.
Before Phoenix could get up and possibly slug the kid, Rooster stepped in front of him and did his best to redirect Phoenix back in her seat. She shoved his hands off of her, but didn't bother putting up much of a fight. It's not over, though. She'd find a way to make the kid hurt eventually. And probably Rooster too for stepping in. Eh, it wouldn't be the first time.
"How about another game?" Rooster tried to lighten the mood by offering a pool cue to anyone willing to play. Hangman took a stick, and so did Fritz. Rooster then racked the balls. When Hangman went to go break, and didn't sink a single ball, Phoenix snorted out a laugh over her glass.
"Impressive." she taunted. "Not surprised you have a hard time getting it in the hole." the innuendo was not lost on Hangman, and he took massive offense to it.
"Didn't have a hard time getting it into your girlfriend's hole." he spat back.
This set Phoenix off. Rooster too, but he had to channel himself and his anger in order to stop a bar fight from breaking out. Phoenix is out for blood, and Hangman is first on her list. She tried to take a swing at him, but Rooster caught her fist and told her to cool it.
"Now's not the time, Phoenix. Calm down. You wanna get kicked out before you even start?" he grunted into her ear, trying his hardest to jail her within his arms so she didn't jump over the pool table and kick ass. Hangman's arrogant taunting wasn't helping.
Bob took a step back, not wanting to get into the middle of it. Smart. Fanboy and Payback were at Phoenix's side, hyping her up for a fight. Hangman's crew were doing the same with him.
"Get the fuck off me so I can kick his ass!" she growled.
"Come on!" he began to haul her away from the scene, hoping maybe some fresh air will cool her off.
It was a challenge getting her outside. Everyone in the bar had seen him hauling her away. Penny asked if everything was alright. Rooster told her not to worry and that he had it covered. Once outside in the cool evening air, he let go of Phoenix who promptly spit at his feet.
"Of course you'd defend him!" she accused.
"I'm not defending anyone!" he shouted back. "I'm trying to protect you and your reputation! At best, you're gonna be dropped from TOPGUN and sent back home!"
"I shouldn't have even come in the first place!"
"Then why did you?" he questioned her, a heavy tone plaguing his statement. She knew what he meant, and she wasn't happy about it.
"Because I'm the best damn pilot here and I'm not gonna let some feelings stop me from doing what I love to do!"
"You need to get over it."
"Don't tell me what I need to do! You're no better than Hangman!"
"Phoenix-"
"Just leave me alone!" she huffed and began walking away from him.
"Phoenix!" he tried calling after her. She responded by sticking both middle fingers up at him and throwing a 'screw you' over her shoulder. Knowing he wasn't going to sway her, he went back into the bar.
"Everything alright, Rooster?" Penny asked again when she spotted him.
"No, but I got it handled." he assured the woman who merely nodded in understanding. "Can I get another beer?"
"You got it, kid."
She handed him a bottle. He didn't feel like heading back to the others and hearing Hangman act like a dick, so he opted to stay at the bar. He slowly sipped his beer as he kept watch at the doors and windows, waiting for Phoenix to come back. She'd be back. She just needed a minute to herself. Hangman went too far. And Rooster felt the urge to slug him. But he couldn't. Not here, not now. If he didn't keep his emotions under control, he'd end up like Phoenix -angry and bitter at the world.
He finished the beer. Penny brought him another. Still, Phoenix hadn't come back. Rooster thought he saw her dark hair peeping by the windows, but he wasn't quite sure. She was probably eyeing the group, either wondering if Hangman bailed yet or deciding what she's gonna do to him if she re-entered. Hangman will get what's coming to him. One way or another. And if the situation was just right, Rooster wouldn't try and stop it.
The bar doors opened, and Rooster hoped it was Phoenix. The dark hair bobbing between the crowd was a good sign. When the figure got closer, he soon realized it wasn't Phoenix and he sputtered on his drink.
"Hey, Bradley." the not-Phoenix woman greeted sheepishly.
"Oh my god." he murmured to himself. Like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. "Oh my god! What are you doing here?!" he excitedly pushed off the bar and wrapped his arms around her in a big bear hug. She lovingly hugged him back. The type of hug you give when you hadn't seen someone in forever. Well... it had been forever.
"Just dropping by." she answered him once he set her back on her feet.
"Are you at TOPGUN?" he asked, but then noted how she wasn't wearing her uniform. No, she was dressed too casually: jeans, a nice t-shirt, and a leather jacket over top. Her jacket had her call sign on it though.
"I was invited back, but I declined. I'm not ready." she shuttered slightly in her response.
"So why'd you come back?"
"Is Natasha here?"
"Oh." oh. Oh no. "Uh yeah. Yeah. But she and Hangman were going at it and she bailed."
"Hangman's here?" she grimaced. Rooster could only offer her a sympathetic smile. No one likes Hangman. But, speak of the devil.....
"Do my eyes deceive me?" his voice spoke up from behind Rooster. "No they don't. Hey there, Sweetheart."
"What do you want, Seresin?" she asked annoyed.
"Well I didn't want anything. But, now that you're here, I've got a few ideas in mind." he winked at her. Rooster fought the urge to punch him. And she clearly didn't appreciate the 'flirting' although she bit her tongue. "Come on, come join the fun." he tried to pull her along to the rest of the gang. She pushed his hand off of her back, instead opting to stick close to Rooster. Rooster walked beside her to the group.
"Lookie lookie who I found." Hangman sang to the group, making all eyes turn to the trio that just walked up. Coyote and Fritz whistled encouragingly. "Take a seat, Sweetheart. I'm sure you remember everyone. We all remember you."
"Yeah, hey guys." she rolled her eyes and ignored Hangman's invitation to sit beside him. She stuck with Rooster.
"Haven't seen you in awhile, Sweetheart." commented Fritz. Even Payback took a bite in the flirting and piggybacked off of Fritz's comment with another whistle. Rooster saw poor Bob looking between everyone with a confused expression on his face.
"How ya been, Sweetheart?" Fanboy chimed in, albeit a little less lewd than the others.
"I've been, Garcia. You?" she said more fondly. Rooster couldn't comment personally on Fanboy's morals, but it seemed Sweetheart held him in good enough regards.
"Not too shabby."
"You joining us at TOPGUN, Sweetheart? Or just here to entertain?" Hangman then asked and Rooster audibly scoffed. Even Bob had enough of it all.
"Come on guys. Do you really gotta talk to her like that? Can't you be a little more respectful and at least call her by her name?"
"Oh, Bobby. That's her Call Sign." mocked Hangman, pointing to said name stitched into her jacket. "She's one of us."
"Really? Well how'd you get the name Sweetheart?" Bob directed his question to her, but Hangman answered anyway.
"Because she's everybody's sweetheart. She bats her eyes at you, and before you know it she's taking her clothes off."
"Not like you would know, Seresin." she snorted back at him and crossed her arms over her chest defiantly. Her clapback was rewarded with some 'oooh's and 'damn's from the others. Hangman stood tall against her insult and played her game.
"The pictures I have beg to differ."
"You're a pig."
"Back off, Hangman. She's smart enough to know not to get involved with you." Rooster came to her defense.
"She gets involved with everyone." he replied. Briefly, his gaze moved behind the duo, then landed back on her with a smirk. "Take our illustrious Phoenix, for example: Sweetheart's latest plaything. She'd know all about Sweetheart's lustful appetite."
Surprised by the mention of Phoenix, she turned around and spotted the brunette standing behind her and Rooster. Disgust, anger, sadness, and more were written across her face. Her eyes glared daggers in her direction. Sweetheart's heart ached at seeing this emotion. What once was love had now turned to hate.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" she spat.
"I was hoping to run into you." Sweetheart replied back solemnly.
"And what made you think I'd want to see you?"
"Phoenix, just calm down-" spoke Rooster but was cut off by Phoenix.
"Shut up! Don't tell me to calm down! I don't like you either!"
"Natasha, I-"
"Stop. I don't want to talk to you, I don't want to see you. I don't know what you thought would happen if you came here, but you can go back home. Because I have nothing to say to you." she said, then promptly grabbed her coat and stormed back out of the bar.
"Natasha! Please." Sweetheart called out, jogging through the crowd to catch up before Phoenix could get too far. Rooster followed after her, just in case Phoenix was in a fighting mood and needed to be held back again.
Phoenix stomped away in a random direction. The sun was starting to set, the air was getting cold, but she just kept on walking with no destination in mind. Sweetheart and Rooster weren't too far behind, calling after her to get her to stop and just take a moment to hear them out. Eventually, after enough begging, Phoenix stopped and turned to glare once more.
"What! What do you fucking what?!"
"I just want to talk to you!" said Sweetheart.
"Well I don't want to talk to you!"
"Natasha, please! Just let me explain!"
"Explain what? Why you just fucking left me? With no warning? Why you betrayed me and then acted like it didn't happen?"
"I didn't betray you!"
"Bullshit!"
"Phoenix, if you'll just let us explain-" Rooster interjected. Again, he was cut off.
"If you talk one more time, I'll knock your teeth out! I don't want to talk to you either!"
"It's not what you think!" defended Rooster. Phoenix snorted in disbelief. Her entire body was racked with angry laughter as she prepared to spit her next insult.
"What the fuck am I supposed to think?! Did you both just assume I was blind and couldn't see what was going on between you two?!" she yelled. The wind started picking up, making her raise her voice even more. Rooster was sure everyone at the bar could hear it, even over the long distance the three of them managed to cover in such a short amount of time.
"There was never anything going on between Rooster and me!" claimed Sweetheart.
"Bullshit! You two started spending a weirdly large amount of time together, and then I just so happen to find a pregnancy test in your bag?! Do you honestly think I'm that fucking dumb?!"
Phoenix's words had hit Sweetheart almost immediately. Rooster could see her tense up and fight back tears that were glossing her eyes. Rooster instinctively went to go comfort his friend, but the action only served to rile the other woman up some more. Like it somehow proved her accusations correct. Sweetheart gently shrugged him off. Whether it was because she didn't want to feed into the delusion, or because she couldn't stand being touched at the moment, he respected it and pulled away. Allowing her to simmer in her emotions on her own.
"It's not like that." she replied. Her tone softer and quieter than before. "Natasha, I swear to you it's not like that at all."
"Then what is it? What am I supposed to believe? That you just magically got pregnant? It's not my pregnancy test, and I didn't get you pregnant, so then what is it?"
Rooster heard Sweetheart quietly sob. She was silent for a moment, and he wondered what was going through her head. He could see the wheels turning underneath her dark locks, like they were opening a doorway that led to the source of all of this commotion.
"I was raped." she shuttered. "I was raped, okay?"
"What?" Phoenix's entire demeanor had switched instantly. Her face dropped the anger, and instead confusion took its place. She briefly glanced towards Rooster, then back to Sweetheart.
"It wasn't Bradley. Before you even ask, or start to think, it wasn't him."
"Don't tell me it was Hangman....."
"No. It was my XO. He raped me and got me pregnant. That's why I left. I didn't want to, but I had no choice."
"And you and Rooster....?"
"He was the one who found me crying on the floor with my pants around my ankles. I asked him to get the pregnancy test for me when I missed my period. He left it with my stuff and that's when you found it." she sobbed out. "He's just a friend! Natasha, I swear to you I never betrayed you! I had no one to turn to except Bradley!"
"Why didn't you come to me?!" Phoenix cried, half offended and half upset. Rooster couldn't tell what she was thinking. "Why didn't you just tell me the truth? Did you think I wouldn't believe you? Or that I'd say it was your fault?"
"I couldn't!" Sweetheart dropped her gaze to the ground and furiously wiped at her eyes with the ends of her sleeves. She paced in place as she spoke, circling between leaning into Rooster's side and stepping away from both of them. "He threatened me that if I ever told anyone, he'd ruin me in more ways than one! I couldn't say anything to anyone. Bradley just happened to find me! I was scared! And on top of all of it, I was pregnant! I didn't know what to do, so I just left! I couldn't take it anymore. I needed to get away." she stuttered on her breath for the last few sentences. Eventually she stopped pacing and decided to just fall to the ground and hug her knees to her chest. Rooster joined her on the ground and pulled her into a side hug as he comfortingly rubbed her back.
Phoenix stood still on her toes for several moments, just watching her girlfriend -well, ex girlfriend- sob her heart out on the ground while Rooster did everything he could to comfort her. And then she stepped forward until she was a foot away from them, and then joined them on the ground. She carefully pulled Sweetheart into her arms, allowing her to cry into her shoulder and neck.
"I would've helped you. We would've found a way." Phoenix comforted.
"I was too scared." said Sweetheart. "I wanted to tell you, I swear I did. But I was scared."
"It's okay. It's not your fault."
"I'm sorry I lied to you."
"I'm sorry I yelled at you. And just assumed things."
"I almost called you a few times." sniffled Sweetheart. "After I left and some time had passed, I thought it was safe for me to tell you everything. But I figured you would be angry at me and didn't want to talk to me ever again."
"I was angry." she confessed. "I was angry because you didn't tell me. I had nothing to tell me that what I was thinking was wrong. Even Rooster didn't say anything."
"I made him promise to keep it a secret. I was worried that even after I left, if word got around, it would only make things worse. I hoped that I would just get the discharge and I would eventually forget about it."
"Believe me, I wanted more than anything to make him pay." Rooster said, malice lacing his voice. "I tried to convince her that she needed to speak up. That it wouldn't get any better if she kept it to herself."
"So nobody knows about this?"
"No. Just us two."
"And my parents. Please don't tell anyone, Tasha."
"I won't. I promise."
And that was that. The three of them sat on the ground for awhile, their arms all wrapped around each other as both Rooster and Phoenix comforted their friend. As the minutes ticked by, her sobs reduced themselves to sniffles, and then to eventually nothing at all. When the well had dried up, she finally pulled back. She wiped at her eyes one last time. They were now red and puffy. What minimal makeup she had worn earlier was now smudged or completely wiped away.
"Come on, let's get out of this cold." said Rooster, noting how the temperature was rapidly dropping as the sun was disappearing.
"I don't have the mental strength to deal with Hangman and them right now. I just wanna go back to my hotel and sleep."
"I'll take you back." offered Rooster, but Phoenix spoke up.
"It's alright, Rooster. I'll go with her." she offered. Rooster wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do to release his friend to the woman who just mere minutes ago was spewing insults and defamations. But he looked into Phoenix's eyes and couldn't find an ounce of malice anymore. If anything, he saw guilt.
"Alright. Listen, if you need anything, I'm just a phone call away. Kay?"
"M'kay." Sweetheart agreed.
"Come on. I'm cold." said Phoenix.
Rooster stood, extending a hand to both women and helping them to their feet. With final goodbyes said, Rooster gave Sweetheart a heartfelt hug, making her promise to call him if she needed him. And then he warned Phoenix to take it easy on her. She had a lot on her plate, and Rooster didn't want Phoenix adding more to it. She promised. And then both women had walked back to the bar where Sweetheart parked her car.
"I'll drive." offered Phoenix, noting how Sweetheart was too drained to safely operate a vehicle. Thankfully, the other woman didn't resist and handed off her keys. She told Phoenix which hotel she was staying at, and Phoenix drove off.
The hotel wasn't too far from the one the officers had Phoenix and the others in for the night. Phoenix could easily walk to her hotel after dropping Sweetheart off. Hell, maybe she could spare a few minutes so she could say a proper goodbye. How is she even supposed to say goodbye? After the bombshell that had been dropped not too long ago? She acted like such an ass. She was embarrassed for herself.
"You wanna come up?" Sweetheart asked tentatively, almost unsure if it was too soon to offer.
"Yeah, sure."
"Unless you have to report in. Because it's alright if you do."
"No, I don't have to be on base until tomorrow."
"Good." Sweetheart sighed with relief. "Cause I missed you."
"I know it may not seem like it, but I missed you too." Phoenix replied sheepishly. Sweetheart smiled and extended a hand out for her to take. She did.
She led Phoenix to the elevator and up to her floor number. Her hotel room was decent. Only slightly better than the one Phoenix was staying in. But that's the difference between paying with your own money and having to just take what's given to you. But it was only for one night.
Phoenix noted how Sweetheart kept all of her stuff in her bag that was placed by the bed. A habit that even Phoenix held due to the quick and fast-paced military life. Much easier to keep everything together in case you had to haul ass.
"Make yourself at home. Is it alright if I take a quick shower?"
"No, go ahead."
"Thanks. I'll be quick. All the crying just made me feel a little icky."
She tried to laugh it off, make it seem like it wasn't a big deal. Phoenix wasn't too keen on joining in on the laughter, but they weren't her feelings to control. So she gave a slight chuckle, reiterating that everything was alright and to take the time she needed, and then Sweetheart headed to the bathroom.
While the shower was going, Phoenix took a little time to take in the room. Small, compact, good for a single guest or two. The king-sized bed was comfy and perfectly neat. Phoenix wondered how long she had been in town -how long had she been in this room waiting?
She checked the mini fridge, seeing some water and other drinks in there, as well as a takeout container half full of Chinese food. Since when did she eat Chinese food?
Sweetheart's bag was tempting to go through. Phoenix had snooped through her stuff in the past. Not with any ill intent. It was just a thing that couple tend to do; ya know, sometimes borrow some clothes, see if maybe they had a phone charger laying around, every now and again Phoenix would steal some of her perfume or lotion. But then she remembered that the last time she went through Sweetheart's stuff, that was when she found the pregnancy test and all this happened. But she was curious. Cautiously, she unzipped the military-issued bag and ruffled through the items. She found all the essential travel items: some clothes, hygienics, hair brush and spare hair ties. And then she found a little box at the bottom of the bag. A jewelry box maybe? She opened it up to see a familiar bracelet inside. A custom bracelet that Phoenix had gifted to her as a present when they graduated from TOPGUN.
Phoenix had no idea what to make of this. Sweetheart had given a similar gift upon graduating. But, in her anger, Phoenix had gotten rid of it. She couldn't look at the piece of jewelry knowing -well, thinking- that the woman who gave it to her was cheating on her and promptly left her behind in the dust. She hated herself.
She put the bracelet back and zipped up the bag. Sweetheart was still in the shower, unknowing of her discovery. Phoenix peeked through the cracked door, calling out her name.
"Yeah?"
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"How'd you know I'd even be here?"
"I didn't." Sweetheart said. "I took a guess and it paid off."
"But what made you even think there was a chance?" she questioned.
"I was invited to TOPGUN too, but I turned it down. I figured that, because you and I were a team, if I got invited then you most likely did too."
"Rooster too?"
"Same deal. I know you guys never really got along, but he's good at what he does and you can't deny it. He deserves to be here. I'd be surprised if he wasn't."
"I guess I should really apologize to him for the way I treated him." Phoenix muttered out. She leaned against the shower frame, thinking of how to go about an apology.
"I'm sure he understands." Sweetheart tried to console, which made Phoenix snort. Sweetheart poked her head from behind the shower liner and quirked an eyebrow.
"You're trying to comfort me when I'm the one who acted like a bitch?"
"I don't blame you. Had the roles been reversed, I would've been angry too. And I'm sure Rooster understands that. You may not have been the nicest, but I was the one who kept secrets."
"I don't blame you for keeping secrets. What happened to you...." she trailed off, hoping she didn't scare the other woman and get her emotional again. "You know it wasn't your fault, right? It was a power dynamic that he used against you."
"Trust me, I know. I've had a couple years of therapy to tell me as much."
Sweetheart finished up in the shower and then grabbed a towel to wrap around herself as she stepped out. She didn't seem too quick to cover herself in front of Phoenix. True, they've seen each other naked hundreds of times. But somehow this felt different. Like it wasn't right. Phoenix looked away.
Sweetheart dug through the clothes in her bag, pulling out a pair of sweatpants and a tank top and changing into them. The two women then joined each other on the bed, sitting criss-cross facing each other. It was a bit awkward between them. So much had been said, yet at the same time, there was so much more than hadn't. Phoenix had a million questions on her tongue, but it didn't seem appropriate to ask them. Except for one.
"So what happens now?"
"What do you mean?" Sweetheart cocked her head.
"I mean, between us? Do we just act like none of this ever happened? Do we just be friends? Or not friends at all?"
"Well..... what do you want?"
"I don't know." she admitted with shame. "I spent so long being angry at you, thinking you didn't ever care about me. And now, knowing what I do, I'm a little confused."
"I'm gonna be honest, I'm not the same as I was before. I've got a lot going on. But, if it means anything to you, I never stopped thinking about you."
"I tried so hard to forget you." she chuckled regretfully. "As you can see, I failed."
"What if we just start over?" offered Sweetheart. "Wipe the slate clean? Forgive and forget?"
"Is it just that easy?" Phoenix questioned in disbelief.
"It can be. If we're both willing to try. I know I wasn't perfect, and I have a bit of a reputation, but I really truly loved you. And I still do. You're the first person I ever committed to. I don't think I've ever said I love you to someone before."
Hearing the confession punched Phoenix in the gut. She wasn't sure if that statement made things better because there was still a chance, or worse because it only highlighted Phoenix's actions. Thinking hard on it, Phoenix did love her. And there had never been any doubt at the time that what they had was genuine. She went to sleep knowing Sweetheart would be there in the morning. And she always was. Phoenix remembered the laughs, the kisses, the sex. Lots of sex. The nights when they had time to themselves after long weeks of training, they'd spend it together in bed. They'd pull out all the stops: wine, chocolate, romcoms, scented candles, the whispers of sweet nothings and a hopeful future. They loved each other like it was a fairytale.
"I'd like that." she finally responded. A small smile pulled at Sweetheart's lips, making Phoenix follow suit and grin as well.
"Good. That's really good."
"So what now?"
"Um.... I know you have to head out early tomorrow.... but, if you want, you can stay tonight." Sweetheart suggested.
"Is that okay with you?"
"I wouldn't have offered if I wasn't."
"Because I don't wanna push you or anything."
"It's alright. I promise." she scooted up towards the pillows and pulled back the covers, allowing herself to squeeze in. She then pulled back the other side and patted the spot beside her for Phoenix.
Phoenix eyed the bed. She wanted nothing more than to crawl in beside the woman she's loved for years. She's happy to forget all of this never happened. Whether or not she could was an issue for another day. Right now, everything was right. She kicked off her shoes, took off her uniform, and got under the covers. Sweetheart turned off the bedside light, and the room was overthrown with darkness minus the street lamps outside the window which casted enough glow so they could see each other's faces.
"How are you? Really? You doin okay?" Phoenix asked. Sweetheart took a deep breath.
"I've been better. But I've come a long way since it happened."
"Do you wanna talk about it?"
"Not really. I've had to recount it enough times with Rooster, my parents, my doctor, and my therapist. I just wanna forget it ever happened."
"Can I ask about the baby?" she questioned. And maybe it wasn't a good time to ask. But she was curious. A baby wasn't a small little fact about someone. If they were truly going to start over and try again, then she needed to know if she could possibly become a step-mom to a baby that was conceived out of malice.
"Gave it up for adoption. I couldn't bring myself to find love for it. I know the baby is an innocent party in all of this, and I don't hold any anger towards it, but I just couldn't do it. Even if I wanted to keep it, I was mentally checked out for the entire pregnancy, and even for some time afterwards. I wouldn't have been a good mom even if I tried."
"It?" she cocked an eyebrow. "Do you not know if it was a boy or a girl?"
"I didn't want to know. I think it would've made the whole thing a lot harder. My mom knows. She was in the delivery room with me. I begged her not to tell me. But the couple that I chose to adopt were very kind. They understood my wishes to not be involved in any way whatsoever, and I knew the baby would be given a good life with them. I guess that's what's keeping me sane and helping me with the guilt."
"You shouldn't feel guilty. You didn't have a choice in any of this."
"I know. I've slowly come to terms with it. And I know I did the right thing for both me and the baby. It took awhile for me to accept reality for what it is." her gaze drifted around the room as she spoke, unable to look Phoenix in the eye. "I really don't wanna talk about this anymore." she begged softly.
"I get it. No more questions."
"You should get some sleep. You've got a big day tomorrow. Do you know why they invited you back?"
"No. They didn't say."
"Whatever the reason, I know you'll kick ass."
That last comment brought a laugh out from the woman. The air was lighter, the mood had lifted. It was a good note to end the night on. Hesitantly, Phoenix reached out to rest her arm against the other woman's frame. She didn't do anything else and allowed Sweetheart to make the next move. Sweetheart scooted closer, snuggling against her.
It felt both weird and right to be wrapped up in each other again after so long. Like they were puzzle pieces that managed to keep their shape despite being tossed in a corner and forgotten about for a couple years. Sweetheart was quick to fall asleep, leaving Phoenix alone with her thoughts. But even she succumbed to the comfort of dreams.
