Dear Maggie, I enjoy immensely how enthusiastic you are about life and how confident you are of yourself and wish I could learn to be like this myself. As a struggling 20 something who is aimlessly flapping her arms as she falls through life, do you have any advice on learning how to drive fearlessly through life in the way that you do? I know that there is no concrete way to answer this, but any words are appreciated. Thank you.
I am not you and you are not me, so the value of my personal commandments might not work for you, but here they are:
1. Decide life is going to be great. All other methods will fail without this prerequisite. A decision that life will be great allows a terrible event to turn into a plot twist along the way, not a confirmation that your life is shit.
2. Actually enjoy things. Itâs #aesthetic to lean on things broodily while looking disengaged, but itâs inherently exclusionary and not as cool as being actually visibly in to life and living.
3. Do it for you, where it = the all of everything. Yes, look cool, but look cool for yourself. At the end of the day, it only matters if you look at your life and say âsweet, man!â Because youâre the only one who has to live in your head.
4. Do anything you want, as long as it is not hurting other people or yourself. The second part of this sentence is just as crucial as the first. Donât do dumb self-sabotaging shit or use up your body before youâre done with it. But otherwise, if you think it might be interesting, do it.
5. Eliminate the time between saying youâre going to do something and actually doing it. Donât say âone day Iâm going to do this thing.â Say âIâm going to do this thingâ and allow that sentence to be a mission statement and your next action to be putting that thing into play.
6. Find your people. They are out there; donât settle for substitutes.
7. Make the world beautiful. In every thing you do, see if you can leave the world a tiny bit prettier or more interesting than when you got there.
8. Love people. All sorts of people on all different parts of their personal journey. Study them and see what makes them tick and see if you can learn from them and vice versa.
9. Lean into anxiety. Anxiety is a chain link fence. A boundary made worse by being able to see whatâs on the other side. You can get through it if you are both strong enough and come equipped with tools or friends with tools. And the more anxiety fences you break through, the fewer you will find in front of you: they are not a renewable resource.
10. Love yourself. Perfect is boring. Someone trying to be the best form of themselves? The most interesting thing in the world.
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