Life's Daily Pimp Slap

A while back I was asked to write a couple blog entries for someone I knew at the time based on the everyday occurrences of people , so I thought I'd share them here. Not everyones cup of tea but I hope they make you laugh just as much as I did while I was writing them AND witnessing these acts. There are plenty of photos I've taken of these occurrences as well. From the lack of what I call "parallel spatial awareness" to your average everyday dingaling (me included lol). Enjoy and have fun poking fun at yourself too as you'll come to realize that some of the things I write about or take a picture of juuuust might be you to the T. Feel free to reblog as often as you want because normal people grow up to be boring adults ;0)

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Boop the snoot 👈🏻 🥰

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🎵 Yo, so I continued to...👆...Beachfront Ave.🎵

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The latest from my condo online bulletin board.  Let’s not overlook what we have going on here:

~ Neighborhood watch

~ A possible crime scene with active Police involvement 

~ Recycling and a desire for a clean mother earth

~ A possible dead body and morning 

All in all, a productive Sunday.  

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Yep, that’s right!  You’re looking at Crystal Pepsi.  The same one you had back in the 90′s but this one is not that old.  It’s out again and still as bad as it was back then.  It literally is hard to swallow (insert Michael Scott punchline). 

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Since there is about 5′ left in front of the parking spot, that means about 5′ of their ass is sticking out in the rear into the driving lane.  I know it’s 7am buuuuut damn.  

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Damn!! Walked through Sears to get to the restaurant for lunch at the mall today. $8000 to $850 pretty much overnight. Now that’s a 🔥fire sale🔥

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It’s like it knows I just landed in Canada. 🤘😝

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The newest funny on my condo’s online bulletin board

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Yep...gonna have to call that a gummy dingaling lol Thanks for the submission @naturelvr69likes

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Why am I getting the impression Herbert from Family Guy is the manager at this KFC?  Thank you @bellringer66 for the submission. 

😘

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Go home line guy, you’re drunk.  

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A post from my condo community in the lost and found.  From the posts about the sex being too loud to drunk Asian guys going unclaimed in the foyers, it’s never a dull moment around here.  The post was removed before I could retrieve the photo.

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When you give your friends medical stickers you ordered off the internet, anything is fair game.

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Hot damn!!!  We now have a breakdancing area at work!  Just call me Shabba-Doo

🕺🏻

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Just remember that every single day is Memorial Day 🇺🇸. If Paul Harvey would have penned one last “...and that’s the rest of the story”, I have no doubt that we would follow the Genesis of a soldier caretaker of this beautiful place we call home. Thank you all for the follows and likes. I appreciate the people I’ve come to know on here from all forms of backgrounds of work and diversities, you are all wonderful!! Be safe 🍻.

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On my flight back from Mexico, I get a text with a pic from a coworker a few rows up from me who is just as much as a geek as I am. Well, it speaks for itself. 🖖🏻🤣

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Was at the Harris Teeter on Sunday and skillfully started the newest hipster craft beer trend heeheehee.  Pick any law and it applies...law of probability...check...Murphy's law...check...Darwin...uhhh...can we just say all theories as I’m sure all of the theories apply. Applied in a selection of gene pool kinda way.  Drive up the price of PBR, this is what they get!!  ((maniacal laugh))