not all who wander are lost.

mcs I like people who smell like cedar and strong coffee.

[brookelynne]

floral self-portraits

•✧{ more here }✧•

[lilw4nderer]

safe places

I have spent years telling myself that these things were my fault, that somehow I deserved the emotional and physical abuse that I suffered, and that I should pack it away because it was something to be ashamed of. Maybe it was the whiskey or maybe it was just time, but I told you about so many things that I’ve never really told anyone. I told you that you had the unfortunate power of scaring me just by drinking or raising your voice or expressing mild disappointment. And you didn’t dismiss my confession or belittle my feelings. You looked at me and you said, “I’m sorry”, and “You didn’t deserve that.”, and “That is not okay.”.

It has been six years. No one has ever told me those things. I don’t think anyone has ever really listened. It felt like safety. Like someone finally acknowledged my fears without indicating that they were unsubstantial. And then we went upstairs and you wanted to communicate and learn and be together, and that was also so strange. It wasn’t until after that I realized that you weren’t just asking, “What do you want?” for your own satisfaction. You genuinely wanted to know what I wanted. That, in itself, is a novelty. I realized that no one has ever had any regard for me. I don’t know what I want. I don’t know what I like. No one has ever given me a chance to consider that. And even when I explained, also for the first time, why sex made me feel so conflicted, because it’s always been a tool for manipulation or abuse, you didn’t shy away from that. You said, “I’m sorry.” and “That is horrible”. You said, “I’m not mad at you”, which sounds like an obvious statement, but one that I’ve needed to hear for six years and never did. And then you said, “I think you could figure this out.” and “It’s not fair to you.” and “We can work on it together”. 

This morning, I smell like you. This morning, I am leaving. Yesterday you kept saying, “two months” because that’s when I’ll see you again. That’s when I hope that I will see you again. Because I like the way that you feel. I don’t think anyone has ever felt quite so safe, without apprehension and angst.

Regardless, I am grateful for last night. I am grateful that someone finally listened and, even if it was an act, they cared, just for a night.

[lilw4nderer]

i can’t help but believe that i’d be much more popular if i was dead

[lilw4nderer]

today three people came

to celebrate my life.

and I can’t help but wonder

how many would’ve come to

celebrate my death.

 I know it is selfish but

sometimes it is hard to differentiate.

because death seems to be

so much more

than life.

[lilw4nderer]

Paradise in Kodiak, Alaska

[amargedom]

When you arise in the morning think of what a privilege it is to be alive, to think, to enjoy, to love …

Marcus Aurelius, Meditations (via h-o-r-n-g-r-y)

[wordsnquotes]

Do you think it’s possible that some people are born to give more love than they will ever get back in return?

Tyler Knott Gregson (via wordsnquotes)

[lilw4nderer]

I want control. I am spinning and I want to slow down. I want to stop, being lonely and being sad and wishing that you wanted me. instead I stopped eating because that's always been one thing I can control. and I feel like a God.

[h-o-r-n-g-r-y]

If you know someone who’s depressed, please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather.  Try to understand the blackness, lethargy, hopelessness, and loneliness they’re going through. Be there for them when they come through the other side. It’s hard to be a friend to someone who’s depressed, but it is one of the kindest, noblest, and best things you will ever do.

Stephen Fry (via h-o-r-n-g-r-y)

[mossymountains-deactivated20240]

[natura-e]

- Nature blog ^^

[thrilled-d]

🍃

[dsxsbx]

Untitled by Dylan Furst

[asunkissedsunflower]

follow @asunkissedsunflower for more

[thrilled-d]

🍃

[wordsnquotes]

The heart wants what it wants. There’s no logic to those things. You meet someone and you fall in love and that’s that.

Woody Allen (via herkindoftea)

[wordsnquotes]

Don’t be afraid. There are exquisite things in store for you. This is merely the beginning.

Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray  (via herkindoftea)

[resquicio]

[bibleandcoffee]

life

[wordsnquotes]

If we’re going to talk, then let’s talk. Forget about what is polite or proper and delve right into what is sincere and honest. Lead me down through the labyrinth of your true, spectacular self. I am not interested in pleasantries. If you want a conversation, then let’s get lost.

Beau Taplin, Real Talk  (via herkindoftea)

[estcoast-dreamer-deactivated201]

Let’s take a trip…

[madness-and-gods]

There is pleasure in the pathless woods, there is rapture in the lonely shore, there is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar; I love not Man the less, but Nature more.

Lord Byron  (via h-o-r-n-g-r-y)