May I have a line please

comments and rebuttals

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That chick's pronouns must be hee haw

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What's the bigger Sports feat. Grand Slam or hole in one

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Guy won a private jet worth over 2 million from Mr Beast Within a month he was busted in Paraguay with millions of dollars worth of drugs in the plane

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Colorado just passed the bill that allows the state to take your child away from you if you misgender your child. Meaning if you call them by their real gender

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Hey

You're doing great

I love you

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Ad space on toilet

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2 million only fans no hug

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Gay people rely on straight people to make more gay people. Let that sink in

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Frozen tomato sauce sticks trans period

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According to officials, scammers have been taking photos from missing pet posts on social media and using AI to distort the picture, while demanding hundreds or thousands of dollars from the owner.

Connecticut Judicial Branch warns of text scams

Blumenthal said scammers will often make a pet appear with injuries or in a place that the owner may not recognize.

Some scammers may even call the owner posing as a veterinarian or police, promising the safe return of the pet and medical care for a cost.

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Past and present event report

Newspaper

North East West South

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I was terrified to get married because I found out that 50% of marriages ....last forever

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My last girlfriend was such a doll and I really mean that because I would blow her up every night. And she really took my breath away. One night I don't want to brag but we were rolling around together and I popped her. they don't call me needle dick for nothing. But she's on the past now and she's doing well. Sometimes I feel her up with helium so she plays hard to get which is kind of fun. - Tom Cotter comedian

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Dude said to me, hey bro the moon landing was fake, I replied you believe the Moon is real?

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You only live once

You only die once

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Don't rest until you've complained about everything

The reward for good work is more work

You're life can't fall apart if you've never had it together

Go ahead and take risks, it gives the rest of us something to laugh at

Every day is Friday when you're unemployed

You're naturally funny because your life is a joke

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Every dead body on Mt. Everest was once a highly motivated person

If life doesn't break you today, don't worry, it will try again tomorrow