She's a Gorgeous mess of chaos;

So this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.

[sexualsuggest]

tell me you love me while you grab my hair and fuck my mouth

[goremate]

from the bottom of my heart, please know, that i’d appreciate being slammed against a wall with your hand down my pants and your breath against my neck saying that I am yours and only yours

[liquidxcocaine]

That moment when you've just dealt with to much and you know you can't take anymore but you don't know what to do anymore.. You feel guilty because if you call for even a break.. He's screwed and has no where to go and you'll feel guilty as fuck.. I just know I can't take anymore.. I really can't .. I know my kids enjoy him being around..but I'm at my final straw, I dread Sundays cause it means his kids are coming back and they're so messed up from everything that they're legit little assholes... I just feel like I've sacrificed so much and continue to do so. And im lost. I need guidance.. Reassurance. Something. I dunno .. With everything happening I feel the old me slipping out.. The me from orangeville. Who was just done and hooked up and gave zero shits .. Thats not me.. Not anymore.. But lately. Shes been trying to come out.. And I can't tell if I like this new guy simply cause he's there and attractive as Shit. Or if ive Just come to terms with this relationship being over and moving forward... I really sont know anymore and I don't even know where to start .. I feel so guilty and gross .. Doing things thar aren't me... Practically sexting a man that isn't mine.. While not even being actually intimate with the one who's technically my partner.. We rarely kids now a days ... I'm so lost :( I'm honestly to the point where I think I need to step back and be single and maybe try this.. No strings thing.. I know I'll get hurt at some point though .. I did last time when I met Greg and tried the NSA life.. Fell hard and got stomped on.. I really just don't know anymore.. I'm so stressed out

[liquidxcocaine]

Dear life I fucking hate you

[liquidxcocaine]

My daughter desperately needs ortho work and its extremely expensive. I'm doing my best to save but I'm the only income in the home and paying rent plus all utilities and other expenses makes it quite difficult to save any bit of money. The ortho place offered me a payment plan of $200 upfront and then $200 every month for 10 months. I'm trying to come up with half but so far I only have $35 saved from all of June. Please help if you can. We appreciate it greatly. #dentalwork #singlemom #help #Thankyou #gofundme

[liquidxcocaine]

Is it to much to ask to be..recognised.. I'm so overwhelmed and strung out, exhausted... Tired.. No time for myself in a long time .. And mow I'm being moody and angry and emotional and snappy... And he doesn't seem to get why... I'm dealing with all of this just as much as he is but it seems he's the only one who can get angry and pissed and stuff.. I'm so exhausted .. I'm being stretched way to far.. I've basically been a mom to two additional kids for almost a year now.. And deep down these kids are good kids. But they're so fucked up by the current situation that they're actually downright mean kids right now .. Talking back, attitude, tantrums, arguing, hitting , slamming doors, and the list goes on .. And I get the brunt of it as he's at work Monday to Friday 6-5.. Mind you the daughter is in school but I still watch the son and he gets pretty awful ..and it's tiring.. Our relationship has taken a huge hit because of all of this .. And I know it's only going to get worse before it possibly even gets better.. Hes going through court right now to try and keep his kids full time because their mom is a legit deadbeat but somehow she managed a lawyer and he can't afford one cause hes so far in debt from her fucking off and leaving him responsible for everything.. I don't see him winning this court case unfortunately , simply because hes a man. Even though he has so much against her. And her extreme lack of involvement .. But shes taking him to the cleaners.. Child support.. Spousal support.. His pension.. Everything .. I'm not strong enough to continue to support him through this... I already feel so responsible for so much of what's happened because I've gotten way to involved in suggesting things to say and yelling at her several times because she wasn't there for her kids but I was.. Hes been.. Distant with me lately. Or maybe that's me projecting.. I finally told him today ( not to Long ago actually ).. That I'm just not able to do this anymore. I can't handle his kids.. I need time for myself.. And so he tells me he'll leave .. Hell go stay with someone else.. Which I mean.. Fine.. But I feel like that's the end of our relationship .. I feel like as a partner I'm failing him and our relationship by not being able to do this .. And all I can think of is.. Before this all blew up...things were..ok .. Now. Things are Shit and I really dont know if theyre gonna get better..and if they are.. When .. How long do I have to wait to feel like were a couple again.. To do dates. And fun stuff.. To Feel appreciated ..and loved and understood .. To not feel like a monster when I say I can't handle his children.. I've said it a couple times. How exhausted I am and stiff and all he's said is " well this is what it would be like if we lived together .." And ..honestly.. That's not My idea of my happy ending.. I feel bad too cause my kids have been involved with him and his kids. And Im not sure how they'd handle the disconnection.. I really think the kids have all bonded.. And my kids are slowly getting accustomed to him as well.. I really don't know anymore ... I'm such a mess.. :(

[wordsnquotes]

Sans élégance de cœur, il n’y a pas d’élégance.

Yves Saint Laurent

Translation: Without elegance of the heart, there isn’t any elegance.

(via wordsnquotes)

[weloveshortvideos]

[nubbsgalore]

[liquidxcocaine]

Sooo this just happened 😳😳. #shavedhead #mylittleprincess #notsolittleanymore #hairtattoo #shessuperhappy

[liquidxcocaine]

Shit. Tell me this isn't happening !!!! Back to school. Grade 6 for Dakota and grade 5 for Meghan 😧😧😧😧😧. Where did the time go!? #grade5 #grade6 #timeflies #notsolittleanymore

[liquidxcocaine]

[artmania-feed]

[wnq-writers]

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[rideordiemitchie-deactivated201]

Bestie

[liquidxcocaine]

Days off got me like .. #dayoff #selfcareday #relaxed #verymuchneeded

[liquidxcocaine]

Such an amazing team of young ladies! So helpful and encouraging/supportive towards Meghan and it being her first year. I'm super happy we did this journey, it was such a fun and amazing time and I can't wait till next year. Hope to see these ladies again soon! 🎾. #softball #thirdplace #stillwon #summertimefun #athletes #pinkteam🎀

[liquidxcocaine]

My furbabies 😍. #kitties #furballs #momandherbabies #crazycatlady

[liquidxcocaine]

My stylist is better than yours. 💁🏼😍🙌🏼 #hair #stylist #blonde #braid #updo