detective. @liquorsexual - Tumblr Blog

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they don’t call me fucking dumbass shithead idiot for nothing

#{ shots fired }

me looking @ Riley’s stats: do I.....should I.........add more beef

#ooc #tbd #savy you gotta stop he's already 124kg #do you know how much that is #it's a goddamn lot

ruinedchildhood

#{ shots fired }

cxstitas:

That ferret may or may not be situated on Abri’s lap, being happily petted and fed treats for behaving so well. Although all the commotion outside is making keeping the furry noodle still harder and harder. The knock at the door is the final straw and he’s off her lap and scratching at the bottom like a fiend — trying to escape back to his owner. ❝ There’s no one home ! Come back later ! — It was supposed to be a surprise Arsenic, stop it. ❞

“Oh, okay, I believe you.” He sounds so genuine, but it’s just part of playing along. Come on, could he really be that dumb? ( well, sometimes. ) Don’t answer that. Anyway. Riley has an idea of who could be in there---and it’s a solid idea, not many people radiate emotional sunshine the way she does.

The scratching sounds start and he leans in, face almost pressed to the closet door. Wonder what that could be. Knock, knock again. “Are you home now? It's later.”

#cxstitas #TWO SECONDS LATER IHSFOJIKWG

Nicole:

“I’ma bite ya. I migh’ no’ be no vampire, bu’ I’ll make sure i’ hurts.” {/She’s letting him get away with this. Nicole could have very well bitten him by now if she wanted to.} “Youse should fear fer yer life!”

Oh...oh no. No, she wins this round, he decides; he’s not going to chance getting bit. It’ll be. Just. That would be weird. Make things weird. “Don’t do that.” Hands to himself, Nicole is free now. “You don’t know where I’ve been.” Much less weird to joke about being dirty than to admit physical pain is his kink.

#gamenu #o h no I had to use a not chibi icon #THROWS MY HANDS IN THE AIR the depravity lives on

Abri:

—— Okay, so, it has been a while. A few months? Possibly even a year. But— ! Abriella is here to reclaim her throne as cabinet dweller by… hiding out in Riley’s closet ?

The closet is definitely a better choice, it has less spiders and a closer proximity to a certain daisy-loving ferret. Although Riley’s finally gotten curious to the noise, time to do what detectives do and...detectivate? ( no, investigate. ) Knock knock, “Sassy police, come out with your hands on your hips.”

#cxstitas #theRE we go

Nicole:

“Yes I’m sure!” {/She’s puffing up her cheeks just slightly when he squishes them. Nicole isn’t going to lie. It’s a pretty funny feeling and it’s actually kind of nice the more she gets used to it.} “I’ma figh’ ya if ya don’ stop.”

“Oh no.” He releases her face for a second, but he’s not finished being this way yet ( but is he ever? answer: no ). “You’re like, five foot, I don’t know what you’re going to do.” One more time. One more squish. “I fear for my life.”

#gamenu #PAPS UR CHEEKS TOO #hold up I need my charger first my battery is being eaten

Riley and Abri in a nutshell

#they're doomed

@gamenu ✩:

“Riley please. My cheeks ain’ toys.”

“No? Are you sure?” Feigning confusion and having not removed his his hands, oh jeez. Here it comes. “Because when I do this”---squish---“you sound kinda like a squeaky toy.”

#gamenu #oh gosh im doing this in Microsoft edge and it's so hard #tumblr is difficult

Forehead smoochu.