There are a few main reasons why I haven’t been active for the past couple of months. I know I don’t have to explain this to yall but, I think you guys deserve it especially after all the support I receive on here.
WARNING - There is writing about mental illnesses
Reason Number One - My Mental Illness
I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder at the age of fourteen and I am now eighteen. It has been a challenge and last year I hit rock bottom for a long time,
I didn’t feel motivated to do anything. I forced myself to go to university and do work because well... my future depends on it.
Last year as an emotional rollercoaster for many reasons and I can tell you my mental illness did not help at all. I am not saying I am one-hundred percent better now but, I find it easier to breathe a little bit more.
Reason Number Two - Family
My parents and I have dealt with a lot within the past two years with my Nanna who has dementia.
Last year it got to the breaking point for all of us and it was a very stressful year, taking my Nanna to the hospital twice and having to put a brave face on in front of others.
I can happily say now that my Nanna is in one of the best nursing homes in the area and it only takes me ten minutes to walk to her if, I feel like seeing her.
Reason Number Three - Relationship
My Ex-Daddy and I were going through a lot of tension last year. We argued a lot and simply, it wasn’t very healthy for the both of us.
But, that wasn’t the reason why we separated. Two nearly three years ago, I was in a long-term relationship, I have this person my all. Showing them my vulnerabilities and being my true self but then, they tore my heart apart.
I love my Ex-Daddy so much but, I was afraid that if I were to open up to him the way I did with my ex I would be hurt once again. So, I pushed him away before that could happen.
We have been separated for a month but, we started talking the other day. I opened up to him in a way that I hadn’t opened up to anyone before. The two of us are building up our relationship again and maybe he might ask me to be his boyfriend... I will say yes.
Reason Number Four - Difficulty in being in Little Space
After my Ex-Daddy hopefully daddy soon and I separated, I found it impossible to be in little space. As that was when I was most vulnerable.
I haven’t been in little space for a couple of months now and I am finding it difficult to open up that part of myself once again.
I hope you guys understand I’m not some superficial blogger who is going to post when they are feeling well... sh*t.
This year I am going to try and blog more, answer all my ask (if that is even possible) but most importantly work on my well being.
I want to say thank you for all my followers who have been supporting me from the very beginning. I hope you all have a good day,
stormborns
turnnoffyourmind
romaincrisis
titsay
origamiaround
snowghoul
izzy806
vaporwave