Cohen Porter was a contradictory creature, and there was no denying that. On one end of the spectrum he was stoic, poised, yet still charismatic. On the other end was a depth of content, thoughts, and feelings that were waiting to flood out. Though often broody and calculating, the blonde was a bundle of enthusiasm, curiosity, and energy — though it was all locked up deep within him. He often tried to be everywhere at once, so as not to miss a thing. He had learned to pick and choose what needed his attention the most, and sort of floated about the rest of the time observing with a keen eye. He did not mind floating about, though sometimes his restlessness caught up with him. He truly needed something to pour his whole self into, and if it wasn’t his acting, it was Logan. Cohen had always tried to make the best of things, even if it meant settling, as he tried to figure out where he fit into the grand scheme of things.
He appreciated the logic and simplicity of living life only in black and white, without the vibrant gradient of a full spectrum to choose from but could never truly live it. He would have let himself lose Logan if he did. He acknowledged it, though Cohen favored color, options, and the grey area. He loved blurred lines and compromise. Cohen liked picking apart different things and attempting to merge them together seamlessly. It stemmed from his wild curiosity of how things – and people worked. He was a kaleidoscope with a plain casing - colorful and constantly changing in a myriad of fascinating ways, though it was all internal. When others took the time to look within him, they were graced with his surprisingly colorful, intrinsic, and bold patterns. It was almost startling with his tranquil exterior, though it was an interesting contrast. His exterior was stable and serene, though inside lurked an exotic, untamed garden bursting with blooms and life. It was a secluded place that not many got to truly visit and explore amongst the flora and fauna, though some that ventured in could never fully venture out. It could be filled with roses one day, and venus fly traps the next.
Taking a deep breath, Cohen tried to push all of the thoughts out of his head and focus on the current moment. The past was called that for a reason. Many celebrities had gone through far worse, and a myriad of scandals had been splashed across magazine covers, though the hype usually faded away within a few weeks. They had had a few months to heal, and they would certainly be reopened, they would heal eventually. They would most likely turn into scars, but Cohen hoped that he would be wearing them as battle scars. They would be reminders of what he fought for – Logan. Reminding himself of that, he ensnared his boyfriend into a tight embrace. Logan’s chorus of “I’m sorry”s was met with a single “I love you,” and he hoped that it would be enough.
Logan had screwed up a lot in his life. He was impulsive and barely ever thought before doing something, so really, it wasn't surprising at all. Still, there weren't many of his mistakes that haunted him. The boy had learned to let go of the past when he was still quite young, and therefore didn't see the point in wasting time dwelling on what couldn't be changed. Some things were a bit hard to forget, though. Sometimes, even if he was the one to blame for a mistake, it upset him more than anything else could have, and he wasn't able to let it go. One of these mistakes was when he didn't show up for an audition for a movie that ended up winning an Oscar, and the other was when he cheated on Cohen.
The brunet wasn't used to feeling so strongly about someone. He had had other boyfriends before the blond, yes, but he never felt for them what he felt for the taller boy. It was a bit like the other completed him, and they balanced each other out perfectly. Not only that, but they also seemed to have a connection that Logan had never experienced before, not even with his best friend. No matter how many times the brunet would roll his eyes at the blond's bad jokes, it was still always done with fondness, and he could barely imagine what life would be like if he didn't hear them every day. He had come so close to experiencing that, though, and to think that it could possibly happen again almost made him shake in fright. He knew that his boyfriend had forgiven him for what he had done, but at the same time, he had a feeling that he hadn't exactly forgotten. How could he, though? Logan had betrayed him, and if the situations were reversed, he honestly wasn't sure how he would have reacted.
Knowing that didn't exactly make things any better, though, and to have all of that information trust into their faces again didn't help either. Still, having his boyfriend's arms around him did help the brunet feel a bit calmer, and as he hugged him back around the shoulders, he decided that he'd try figuring out how the information got out later on. "I love you so much," he mumbled as he buried his face into the crook of the other's neck, almost hoping that being so close to him would stop him from ever leaving him.