@lookather-watchergo - Tumblr Blog

Until a few weeks ago, I was someone you put on a pedestal, now I am someone "no one likes" and I don't care about people's opinion, but it came from you; the one who chased me until I gave up, as if I was worthy. So why would one of the nicest guy I know make me feel bad about myself? As if I needed someone's help to dislike myself. Why would he say something like that? It hit me because you are the person I least expected it. It hit me because somehow I decreased in your opinion, even though it was expected. I loved and accepted you the way you are, but maybe it is selfish to expect the same from you. You told me maybe you don't know how to love, but I am the one crying because I am someone impossible to love. I guess I am the one to blame, I let you in when I knew this would happen. 29.04.25

If I had a checklist - and I do - you wouldn't fit in - and you don't. And maybe I was waiting for something I thought I wanted - although I still do - and I got just what I needed - without realising it. Am I giving up? Am I lowering my standards? But how could it be when you are better than me? When God chose Saul, Samuel was delighted - apparently, there was no better choice. When God rejected Saul, Samuel grieved over it, and when God chose David, Samuel was stupefied - he was almost in unbelief. God then said we don't see as he sees because we see outwardly while He sees inwards. I almost did not allow us to happen, and for a while, I was in denial. And I might be wrong, but I do believe His hand is on it; He led me into you. So how could i have stopped it? But if this is true, it means you are the one. And if not, am I just comforting myself? Am I trying to justify settling down for you?

— I guess only time will tell. 27.04.25

What if you don't think I am the one? What if I am just another girl? What if you are telling me just what I want to hear? What if I am blinded by what I am feeling? And what if I decide to stay anyway? Isn't it sad if this is enough for me? What if you don't lose a thought wishing to spend your life by my side as I have lost a thousand and will probably lose some more? What if my love keeps growing while you get overwhelmed by me? What if the thought of your touch is enough to turn me on, but you think about someone else because I don't have the same effect on you? What if you can't take me serious as you said you would? What if your heart doesn't hurt by the thought of losing me? How long will I stay? What if I stay anyway? I tried to get rid of you, what if I do?

— What If? 25.04.25

ihopeinjesus

Names of God

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The current season of my life: waiting.

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Na verdade eu fico entediada com as pessoas

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Leave the World Behind (2023)

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"Penitência não é você ficar se flagelando, se autodestruindo, pois aí o arrependimento fica muito próximo de um negócio diabólico que é o remorso, que significa remorder-se: morder a ferida impedindo-a de curar. Se você fez o errado, faça o certo; se fez o mal, faça o bem: essa é a verdadeira penitência. Só isso"