BEETLEJUICE BEETLEJUICE SPOILERS !!
“Isn’t this romantic? A private wedding with our closest friends and an entire orchestra to play us in.” The man next to you sighs dreamily, as if he hadn’t taken you and a whole church full of people hostage, “if that doesn’t say ‘dream wedding’, then I don’t know what will.”
“So kind of you to notice, sweetheart.”
He ignores any curses you throw his way as you both make your way towards the front, arms laced together in a mock loving gesture.
this was.. such a bizarre twist of events.
for almost two years, you’d been Lydia Deetz’s personal assistant. Grabbing her coffee, running her feedback to anyone who needed it, just doing whatever it was she needed done for her.
she was nice, if not a little spaced out at times. as far as employers go, she’d have to be one of your best ones.
which is why you felt a little obligated when she asked you a pretty big favor.
you had to drive out with your bosses to help deal a couple issues that arose when the show was briefly paused due to the passing of Lydia’s father.
once you arrived at her old home, you kept things organized for the wake to take some of the load off of her.
later on, by order of Rory, you were put in charge of handling all necessities required for his wedding before he even officially proposed.
taking it as an opportunity to avoid the family matters that plagued the Deetzs as much as possible, you kept your head down and typed away at your laptop.
you will admit that the change of scenery was refreshing. Instead of a city filled with noisy cars, you’d been brought into a nice, quiet town.
well, at least it was quiet before some weird stuff started.
first, it was the occasional static on your laptop, which you’d shrugged off as poor connection.
then, bugs had seemed to have it out for you as they found their ways into whatever clothes you’d packed for the trip.
“this is an old house. It’s not uncommon for bugs to find their way inside.” you tried to justify as spiders crawled all over your former favorite bra.
although you’d genuinely thought you were going crazy when some weird flyer kept popping up wherever you went. At the dining table, inside your shoe(?), in the bathroom.
not wanting to cause any potential trouble, you just kept everything to yourself and tried to ignore it for the time being.
(it was hard to ignore the one that somehow ended up in the back pocket of the very jeans you had been wearing all day)
all of which is forgotten as a series of bizarre events had completely derailed the rest of the evening.
as you’re rushed around town by both of your employers, you eventually find your way into the church for the wedding.
that is, until the ceremony was rudely interrupted by someone that had come to claim what was due.
now, you’re dressed in some poofy, 80’s wedding dress that’s practically impossible to walk in about to be wed to a demon. The very one who somehow wormed his way into your short visit.
Lydia looks on in shock from behind one of the pews, her daughter and stepmother sharing the same mortified expression as you’re yanked down the aisle.
“I can’t believe the day’s finally here! Are you ready for the rest of our lives together, honey?” Beetlejuice gushes, strong-arming you into his side.
“No wa-“ is all you manage to get out before something zips! over your lips, smothering whatever objections you had.
“Whoops, looks like someone’s gettin’ cold feet.”
He cackles as you try to remove the zipper that conveniently had no slider. You’re given one last slimy grin before he forces you to face forward, urging the priest to begin.
god, serves you right for being an assistant to a paranormal TV personality.
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
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