Clearing Up Misunderstandings, Part 4: A Pre-Emptive Explanation
It’s been a long time - about 8 months - since I had to address wild and false accusations leveled at me. Well, that time has finally come again. Let’s jump right into it!
On January 22nd, an individual contacted me to share her criticism of Yandere Simulator. She seemed to believe that Yandere Simulator contains depictions of underage characters in “sexual situations”. There are no “sexual situations” in Yandere Simulator; there are characters who make vague statements which imply that they are sexually active outside of school, but there are no characters who engage in sexual activity anywhere that the player can see them.
This individual, who I will refer to as “N”, expressed her belief that Twitch chose to ban broadcasts of Yandere Simulator because it contains “sexualized” underage characters.
If you’ve been keeping up with Yandere Simulator, you should be aware that I’ve been searching for a firm, solid, concrete reason why Twitch chose to ban Yandere Simulator from it service. Banning the game because of “underage” characters in “sexual situations” would be absurd for two reasons: first of all, there are no sexual situations visible anywhere in the game. Second of all, age of consent is different everywhere in the world. In some countries, it’s as high as 20. In other countries, it’s as low as 9.
I believe it would be ridiculous to ban Yandere Simulator because of an arbitrary number that changes depending on what country you’re in. I pointed this out, and “N” responded by accusing me of being a pedophile.
This is where I should have just rolled my eyes and proceed to ignore all future communication from this obnoxious individual. Instead, I made the mistake of responding to them.
I attempted to explain that it’s pointless to assign an age to a fictional character, because fictional characters can be clones, vampires, robots, or any other type of character whose age doesn’t reflect their physical appearance. I pointed out that, when it comes to fictional characters, ages are completely arbitrary.
“N” interpreted this as evidence that I’m a pedophile. (Actually, throughout our entire conversation, she interpreted literally every statement I made as evidence that I’m a pedophile. I could say “the sky is blue” and she would hear the words “I rape children!”)
At this point in time, I asked her why she demonized pedophiles. A person does not choose their sexual orientation. Sexual preference is not a choice. No person chooses to become a pedophile. It’s involuntary. Pedophilia is a defect, an illness, a disorder. A pedophile has something broken inside of them, and as of now, there is no cure. A pedophile lives with a curse. I look upon pedophiles with a deep degree of pity, but not hate. I cannot bring myself to hate someone who did not consciously, deliberately choose to be the way they are.
Now, child molesters and child rapists, those are a completely different story. It’s unforgivable to deliberately violate another human being, especially someone who is too young to defend themself or even comprehend what you’re doing to them. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again - if a child molester or child rapist is given the death penalty, I would gladly serve as their executioner.
I asked “N” to explain the difference between someone who is 18 years old, and someone who is one day younger. There is no significant difference between those two people. On your 18th birthday, you do not open a box that contains maturity, wisdom, and responsibility. A person who is 17-years-and-364-days-old is practically the same as a person who is 18 years old.
Unfortunately, “N” did not comprehend the nuance of my statements. She insisted that all sexual contact between minors and adults is inherently abusive. She was absolutely obsessed with the idea of exposing me as an evil, demonic pedophile. She demanded that I tell her what I think the age of consent should be.
This should have been my cue that “N” completely lacked even the slightest degree of reading comprehension skill, because I had just explained that someone who passes the age of consent is not magically “ready” for sex just because they have had a certain number of birthdays.
I pointed out that there are many people under the age of 18 who have had sexual experiences without being traumatized. I pointed out that some people aren’t “ready” for sex even after age 18. All human beings are different from one another, thus one “age of consent” will not work for all humans. I attempted to propose the idea of finding another way to determine whether or not someone is “ready” for sex, such as a passing a test that grants a “sex license.”
Regrettably, these concepts were simply too complex for poor “N” to grasp. Intent on forcing me to answer a question that would allow her to brand me as a pedophile, she demanded to know if I would permit a 14-year-old to have sex with a grown man if the 14-year-old had passed the “sex license test” that I had proposed.
Well, obviously, if there’s a test that objectively proves that a person is ready for sex, and a person passes that test, then that person is objectively ready for sex. This is simple logic, but “N” lacked the mental capacity to figure this out for herself.
At this point, I should have realized that it would be absolutely impossible to have any sort of meaningful or productive conversation with “N”. However, I continued speaking with her.
Despite my attempts to make clear and straightforward statements that could not possibly be misconstrued, “N” continued to interpret my every word as evidence that I was an evil, nasty pedophile. Because she was utterly convinced that I supported child molestation, she attempted to teach me that child abuse is bad. Well, obviously it’s bad! “Abuse” is right there in the name! Anything with “abuse” in the name is self-evidently bad! I don’t need to be taught that!
At this point in time, “N” made the following comment:
“All mental health professionals I’ve seen have agreed that 14 is too young.”
I asked “N” to clarify this statement. She admitted that, when she was 14, she had been molested by an adult.
At once, everything finally made sense. All of the puzzle pieces fell into place. I understood everything perfectly.
I wasn’t speaking to an obnoxious jerk. I wasn’t speaking to someone who lacked reading comprehension ability. I wasn’t speaking to someone who was remarkably unintelligent.
I was speaking to someone who was hurting.
“N” had gone through a horrible experience that no person should ever have to endure, and desired justice for what had been done to her. To her, the only way to “strike back” would be to pick a target (me) and bring shame and harm upon this person (with accusations of pedophilia and support for child abuse). The act of “attacking” or “exposing” a predator would bring her catharsis and relief.
Her desire to attack and expose a pedophile had grown so strong that it had morphed into an obsession; an obsession that caused her to abandon all semblance of logic or rational thought. No matter what I said, no matter how much I condemned child abuse, she would remain completely, totally, utterly convinced that I was a baby-raping monster. She had brainwashed herself to believe that I was a pedophile, and absolutely nothing I could say would make her think otherwise.
This is when I finally made the decision to stop speaking with her. I could no longer think of her as an annoying Internet troll making dumb arguments. She was fighting a battle that she could not win, because I’m not a pedophile. And I was fighting a battle that I could not win, because I was attempting to use logic with someone whose traumatic experiences would not allow them to see reason.
I thought that, by ceasing to communicate her, everything would be over…
…but that’s when I saw a Tumblr post where she contacted someone anonymously, claimed she had proof that I was “okay with sexual molestation of children”, and asked for advice on “exposing” me.
Oh, no you don’t. Sorry, “N”. It’s not going to happen.
I know that you’ve gone through indescribable, immeasurable pain, and survived an experience that I can’t even begin to imagine, but you’re not going to ruin my future career or demolish everything I’ve worked to create over the past 2 years because you’ve developed strange delusions about me.
That is why I’ve chosen to make this post. I want to tell our story before she puts some kind of bizarre spin on our e-mail chain and says “Look at this damning evidence that YandereDev is a pedophile!”
If you see a Tumblr post pop up making absurd claims that I somehow support child abuse, now you know who it’s coming from - a hurt young woman who desperately wants justice for what happened to her by lashing out and ruining a man’s career. She’s developed an obsession with the idea that I’m an evil monster who supports child molestation, and she’s determined to “expose” me for a delusion that she’s cooked up inside of her head.
I feel deep pity and empathy for her, but there’s no chance in hell that she’s going to tarnish my reputation by spreading a completely false narrative about me.
Sorry, “N”. I wish you the best, but you should try to heal with constructive methods, not destructive methods. Please do your best to free yourself from the bizarre delusional beliefs you’ve developed about me.
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