I don't have a title anymore

Hello, I'm Castiel, Angel of the Lord. Or, well, I was. I recently had my grace taken away from me. I am trying to figure out life as a human, but it is a struggle. ((Hey, I'm Karen, and this is my post s8 finale Castiel rp blog. Please read any and all links before getting involved in any thread with me.)) m!a: none

[lostwithoutgrace]

((I'm still not in the mood to reply to anything!  I'm seriously starting to think I've completely lost interest in this blog.))

[lostwithoutgrace]

((So I'm like not in the mood to rp tonight at all.  In fact, I kind of wonder why I'm still doing this.  Like only two threads really make me feel motivated to write anything, with all the others I have going on it feels like I'm just going through the motions because they expect me to reply to them.  I'm not motivated to write open starters, and if anyone else tried to make another thread with me, chances are I'd dread starting it.

Yeah, sorry, but for at least tonight I really don't wanna be on here.  I don't want to completely give up on rping, like I said, I do have a few threads I adore, but other than that, I feel like there's no purpose for me.))

[grumblygardensarchive]

My muse isn't going to make the night. While trying to make them comfortable, what are your last words to them?

[lostwithoutgrace]

Castiel walked out of the room and smiled as he saw Anna with Jimmy.  He moved towards the bed and sat down near them, petting the kitten’s head.  "Whenever you’re ready, I am ready."

[annatheangelmilton-archived]

Anna smiled at Castiel when he sat on the bed next to them and kissed Jimmy’s nose before she said, “I’m ready now. Be good Jimmy, and take a nap while we’re gone." she said as she got up and grabbed her bag, throwing it over her shoulder as she moved to go to the door and looked back to make sure Castiel was following.

[lostwithoutgrace]

Castiel got up as Anna did, strolling along behind her.  One of Jimmy's toys managed to catch his eye, and Cas walked back and placed it on the bed.  "That is for in case you cannot sleep."  He joined Anna back up and followed her out the door.  "How far is it to the park?"

[yoooooimovedblogs-deactivated20]

that one rp partner that u love rping with and is perfect in every way

[lostwithoutgrace]

Castiel walked into the bathroom, dressing into a pale blue tee, a grey jacket, and a pair of jeans.  It was something a little more casual than he usually wore - his ensembles usually included a dressier shirt and a tie that wasn’t tied correctly - because they were going to the park.  "Are you done out there?" he asked once he was fully clothed.

[annatheangelmilton-archived]

Once Castiel went into the bathroom to change, she changed into her clothes quickly. It didn’t take her long, and when she was done she cleaned up her clothes and put them in her bag before she sat on the ground to play with Jimmy before they left. “Yes, I’m done." she called out to Castiel as she kissed the kittens head and brought him to the bed with her to cuddle with.

[lostwithoutgrace]

Castiel walked out of the room and smiled as he saw Anna with Jimmy.  He moved towards the bed and sat down near them, petting the kitten's head.  "Whenever you're ready, I am ready."

[lostwithoutgrace]

"I still do not know where they are.  Isn’t losing something when you cannot pinpoint where an item’s location is?  I still lost them."  Castiel looked down slightly, feeling a little saddened by it all.

[jesslynshepard-deactivated20170]

She took a harsh breath and thought about what to say. “We should change the topic, Sir.", Jess quickly said then and offered a smile, thinkng about what to do with the man. A quick glance at her watch told her she still had some time. “Do you .. uh, want to to go drink something or such?"

[lostwithoutgrace]

"Right, I imagine this is actually quite depressing to talk about.  Sorry."  Castiel looked at her apologetically.  Why did every conversation he seemed to get into ever since he fell have to turn into something saddening?  "I am feeling a little thirsty.  What the hell!" he said, using one of the few human phrases he knew.

[flawlesswifieverywhere-blog]

+lostwithoutgrace is headed for eternal damnation. Good luck with that.

[flawlesswifieverywhere-blog]

Sam tilted his head, gazing at the ex-angel for a prolonged moment. “Well… Maybe you don’t need to ask at all. I know you need guidance, and God knows you’ve been giving it to me for however long it’s been. I might as well make an attempt at returning the favour," he proffered, shrugging lightly. This much was true, of course - he wanted to help, and, in some ways, he yearned for it. It would bring them closer, give him an excuse to spend time with Castiel. But then, he didn’t really need an excuse.

A soft wisp of a laugh pushed its way through Sam’s lips, and he nodded in agreement. “Yeah, it’s… It’s dumb. Not to mention a waste of resources… But forget it - forget it, ‘cause it’s not worth wasting our breath on, huh?" He grinned at the other man, before spreading his arms along the back of the couch. “So, what d’you wanna do today, huh Cas?"

[lostwithoutgrace]

"Thank you.  I know you have not done much of anything to help yet, but even saying you will is enough."  Castiel smiled, feeling lucky to have such a friend like Sam.  Even though when he first met the hunter he pegged him as an abomination, he'd come to see instead such a kind-hearted man, one he was happy to know.

As Sam asked him what he wanted to do today, Castiel came to a blank.  "I do not know.  Usually there isn't much free time to do things, what with having to deal with all these cases because of the fallen angels.  I never thought we would have a break to actually do much of anything."

[lostwithoutgrace]

"Not very well.  Though how else would you expect a fallen angel to feel?"  The transition from angel to human was not an easy thing to cope with at all.  How do you go from feeling like you’re cramped inside a vessel to having a perfectly fitted soul, thus in comparison actually feeling smaller than the body inside?  How do you go from being so powerful to being able to do little of anything?

[glitter-inthe-gutter2-blog-blog]

"Yeah, Dean told me… I’m sorry, sweetie. If you need me to do anything or you want help, just say and I’ll do my best. Can’t exactly tell what it’s like, but I might be able to help with the more human side of things." she shrugged, giving him a small smile in hopes to make him feel better. Where ‘better’ was on the scale of ‘Things Cas Is Right Now’, she had no idea. But, hey, she tried.

[lostwithoutgrace]

"Thank you.  It will be nice to have someone else to turn to for advice.  Humans are each quite different and varied.  The more people I can learn from the better," Castiel said, smiling at her.

[lostwithoutgrace]

Few months later this time [closed]

[crowleytm]

Crowley’s eyebrows raised a fraction, he pulled back just slightly not out of worry or anything, he merely wanted a better look at Castiel. He could see a little bit of unease on Cas’s face, though his words had been sincere. “You… you sure?" The backs of Crowley’s fingers gently stroked over Castiel’s cheek, “if that’s what you want, I promise I’ll take care of you and make it worth your while."

[lostwithoutgrace]

"I am sure."  Castiel's eyes fluttered close with the feel of Crowley's fingers on his cheek.  His lips curled up in a slight smile before he opened his eyes again.  "I know you won't hurt me.  You love me too much."

[lostwithoutgrace]

"I will keep that in mind."  Castiel walked over to his bag of clothes and rummaged through it, looking for something to wear today.  "Do you mind if I use the bathroom to change or would you want to use it first?"  It would be rude to just take it from her when she might’ve been expecting to have the first turn.

[annatheangelmilton-archived]

Anna nods and grabs some clothes to change into as well. At his question she looks up and smiles as she shakes her head. “No, I’m alright Castiel. You can change in the bathroom. I’ll change out here while you’re in there." she said smiling at him until she moved to grab the rest of her clothes.

[lostwithoutgrace]

Castiel walked into the bathroom, dressing into a pale blue tee, a grey jacket, and a pair of jeans.  It was something a little more casual than he usually wore - his ensembles usually included a dressier shirt and a tie that wasn't tied correctly - because they were going to the park.  "Are you done out there?" he asked once he was fully clothed.

[lostwithoutgrace]

"I am not surprised.  I’d rather have fresh food as well."  Castiel listened to Anna’s suggestions, but was caught off-guard by her question.  "I…I cannot recall.  I’ve never had the freedom to even do any of this.  I guess thinking of ideas to do incase I became human was something I never bothered with.  Going to the park would be nice though."

[annatheangelmilton-archived]

Anna laughed and nodded, “As would I. I understand completely." she said smiling as she bent down to pet the kitten before she smiled up at Castiel. “Well then, we will go to the park. Don’t worry Castiel, you will learn in time what it’s like to want to do your own thing. If you see something you like, or you feel you would enjoy, you simply need to tell me and we can do it." she said softly as she got up. “Now, lets dress and get ready to go."

[lostwithoutgrace]

"I will keep that in mind."  Castiel walked over to his bag of clothes and rummaged through it, looking for something to wear today.  "Do you mind if I use the bathroom to change or would you want to use it first?"  It would be rude to just take it from her when she might've been expecting to have the first turn.

[the-death-of-kamkairo-deactivat]

You ever stumble across something on tumblr that you really don’t like, and you try to be all chill about it but on the inside you’re like

[pwincessbb]

[situsatan]

WHEN CHARACTER LIFESPANS DON’T MATCH AND ONE WILL DIE LEAVING THE OTHER YEARS OF LONESOME ANGUISH

[lostwithoutgrace]

((It's become that time again, where my adventures going through artists have led me back to the Jefferson Starship page to blast Miracles non-stop.  (If you don't understand my attachment to this song, I'll give you a hint: SPN ep Mommy Dearest.)

Only this time it's dawned on me I have money in my iTunes account.

I can actually buy this damn song and then take it around with me on my iPod.

For a girl who uses Supernatural as an excuse to buy more classic rock songs, I'm surprised I haven't jumped on this one yet.  Especially this one.))

[lostwithoutgrace]

"See, Jimmy does want food in the morning.  I wasn’t completely wrong," Castiel said smiling with a slight amount of pride on his face.  "So do you have any plans for us to do today?  I know you came up with ideas yesterday and thus it’s unfair for me to ask you for more, but I have none of my own."

[annatheangelmilton-archived]

Anna laughs softly and nods. “You were right about him wanting to be fed, but I think he wanted fresh food instead of food that was sitting out all night. Some animals are picky like that." she said as she moved to sit on the bed. “Well, I was thinking maybe we could go shopping, take a walk, go to the park; something to that effect." she said smiling. “Is there anything you have always wanted to do but never got the chance?" she asked softly.

[lostwithoutgrace]

"I am not surprised.  I'd rather have fresh food as well."  Castiel listened to Anna's suggestions, but was caught off-guard by her question.  "I...I cannot recall.  I've never had the freedom to even do any of this.  I guess thinking of ideas to do incase I became human was something I never bothered with.  Going to the park would be nice though."