alyssa

26 || gemini || joe keery

[loversagile]

masterlist ♡ daddy joe masterlist ♡

[loversagile]

OMG YOURE BACK!!! can you please write about joe and reader on their babymoon? like equal parts fluff but also yk…

A BABY MOON???? WITH DADDY!JOE

yeah, no. he has it planned before the baby has even actually been conceived.

“you ever heard of a baby moon?” he asks when you’re laying in bed one night.

a gold banded ring sits light on your ring finger now like it was always supposed to be there. like there was no other way it was meant to be.

“a baby moon?” you mutter, only half paying attention to him. your attention also half on the documentary playing on the tv. “like when the moon is a toenail?”

he huffs out a laugh and that makes you glance over to him.

“no-“ he sets his phone down on his chest and his eyes scan over your face. bare and soft. ready for bed. “it’s when women get pregnant. you go on like a trip before the baby comes. one last trip with just two before it’s three.”

his voice is soft and a quiet kind of smile lingers on his lips. he looks as though he’s already planning it and you weren’t even pregnant yet. yet.

babies in parks. across restaurants and busy retail stores. they always caught his eye and he’d smile. wave a finger and make them smile. then he’d look at you. always you. wondering what it would be like one day. a little one that was purely a perfect blend of him and you.

he wasn’t supposed to be the one thinking like this. having dreams of babies in high chairs. calling him ‘daddy’. you were supposed to be convincing him to give in. but now he’s the one crowding you against the counter after dinner. your sleeves pushed up to your elbow as you tried to wash dishes. but his lips are by your ear. playfully nipping at your earlobe as you try to squirm away.

“joe!” you squeal as his tongue darts into your ear. your chin tilting until your half hidden in your hoodie.

“mm,” he hums and settles down. chin resting on your shoulder. “let’s have a baby..”

his words make you still. scrub daddy falling into the soapy water. you turn your head to look at him over your shoulder. “what did you say?”

he stands up straighter and shrugs it off. trying to play it cool as he runs a hand through his still damp hair from his prior shower. “nothing.”

now you were seven months pregnant and rounded in every aspect. the pregnancy surprisingly hasn’t been that bad. the first two months were tiring and all you did for the most part was nap. by month four you were full of energy. daily walks around the park. doing laundry even when joe begged for you to just go lay down on the couch.

“this is so pretty.” you smiled as you waddled up the back porch steps of the cabin. it was the back porch but it was the main entrance that sat facing the beautiful lake. “look.” one hand settled on your lower back and you pointed with the other one to the sunset reflecting off the water.

“you are so pretty.” joe says with a soft smile as his lips pressed to your cheek. he was never far now. a hovering mother hen. “will you please come inside and sit for a minute? i don’t want your ankles to swell.”

you huff out a sigh and waddle inside the cabin in front of him. plopping down(carefully) on the couch. feet propping on one end as your head rested on the opposite end of the couch. joe gets everything inside and then sits down by your feet. listing them only to place them down in his lap.

“you okay?” he ask quietly as his thumbs already begin to dig into the arch of your right foot.

“mhmmm…” you hum and stare over at him. eyes half lidded slightly. “wanna swim later in the lake.” you mutter.

“you can do everything you want tomorrow.” he says softly with a nod. “we’ll get up early and go into the cute little town we passed through. get coffee and something sweet. maybe find a book store.”

“god, you’re saying all my head turning words baby.” you say with a sigh and a smile tugging at your lips.

it settles quietly between you two for a moment. you watch him as his eyes drift to your stomach. a glaze lying over those hazel eyes. he tended to get the same dazed look in his eyes when he stared too long at your belly. like it was hitting him all over again.

his left hand moved from your foot and settled over your stomach. spreading wide. you let out a soft settled sigh and he finally met your eyes.

“it won’t just be us anymore…” he whispered quietly. almost like he was saddened at the thought, but enthralled by the future of it all.

“it’ll always be us.” you mutter as your hand rested on top of his. “plus a mix of us. but it’s always us.”

the left corner of his mouth tugs up and he lets out a soft huff of a breath. almost a laugh but not quite.

“that’s a good way to put it.” he nods and looks back down to your rounded belly. “she’s gonna be spoiled rotten.” he says it like he already knows he’s going to give into every pouty lip and teary eyed stare. “i’m gonna be ruined, ya know that? if it isn’t her, it’ll be you.”

he’s not upset. not even a little. he’s excited. more than excited. the word didn’t quite exist yet for how he felt.

“i love you.” he mutters as he leans down to press his lips against your stomach. “you too, butter bean.”

[loversagile]

hiiij omg i love how realistic you write!!

is it possible if you could write about daddy joe?? maybe reader slept in a cute pyjama set or maybe nothing at all so when he wakes up he doesn’t want to disturb her sleeping but cant resist kissing her back and shoulders. or something along those lines!!??

i'm back because i crave daddy!joe that much

just him with a little bit of scruff. the slight pudge that he complains and pokes at when sitting on the couch, but you love it and always show your appreciation towards when you're down that way wink wink.

you'd stir from the tickling matter that goes across your bare shoulder. the matching pajama set you had been sent from some brand had been surprisingly comfortable. racerback tank with matching boxer like shorts. cherries littered through the pink and white stripes.

the stubble brushed across your lower back this time. a warm hand spread across the exposed skin as the shirt was pushed up. You had fallen asleep tucked into joe, but somewhere in the night you had rolled to your stomach. now facing away from him. right leg hiked up slightly to achieve the optimal sleeping position known to man.

then the hand went down to your ass cheek. squeezing it. shaking it. then a kiss to your lower back. your didn't open your eyes just yet. just waited to see what his motives exactly were. the weight of his head rested against the middle of your back. cheek warm against your skin.

squeeze. shake. kiss.

"what the hell are you doing?" you muttered half awake now.

"playing." he muttered as he did that same thing again. "it moves."

he repeated the steps again. you laid there and let him do whatever made him happy. sleep was tugging at you, but the morning sunlight creeping through made it impossible.

you felt him shift on the bed. the mattress dipping as his hands pressed into it beside your hips. now he was hovering over your back. head further down by your backside. a lazy kiss was pressed to the back your thigh. then your lower back. then up until he was at your bare shoulder.

"he's still asleep." he muttered against your skin. your eyes fluttering open to see him over your shoulder as your cheek pressed to your pillow.

"good." you hummed.

he lowered his head again. lips pressing to your skin as he peered up through those thick dark eyelashes. "wanna do anything or just sleep?" he muttered with that mischievous tilt to his lips.

you couldn't even try and fight away the sleepy smile that tugged at your own lips. "what if i just said sleep?" you muttered quietly.

"then we'll sleep till little dude needs us." he shrugged softly and leaned up over your shoulder till his lips found your temple. "i'm not a teenager, baby. i can control myself somewhat." he nipped at your jaw as he pulled back.

"bullshit. you'll just take an extra long shower-" you called him out and let out a huff of a laugh.

"hey!" he scolded you playfully. "I said somewhat-" he had leaned forward ever so slightly so his hips were pressed to your backside now.

the slight press of them to your backside made you instinctively press back. a throb already forming between your thighs. it fell silent between the two of you now. a slight rock of his hips against the thin material of your shorts already had a unforgiveable wetness forming.

"mm, why are you fighting it, hm?" he hummed as he watched your eyes flutter shut. "you don't wanna sleep." he muttered against your shoulder. his right hand coming up to move your hair so he could push your hair aside. kissing the spot at the nape of your neck that made you nearly shudder. "you want daddy to take care of you, hm?"

[loversagile]

you guys don't understand how bad i need joe in a fifty shades of grey type of role where he's a hardass CEO hard ass and when you come in for an interview everyone's muttering 'good luck' and shit like that and yeah during your interview as his receptionist you're terrified and shaking with nerves. but you get the job and one evening you're both leaving super after hours and he stops you from being almost mugged in the parking lot. then he starts being everywhere coincidentally.

come to find out he's on some YOU type of shit. he's been stalking you this entire time. he didn't even have anymore interviews lined up for the role. only yours. actually hacked into your computer to have the job only show to you in some way (he's a billionaire they could do that probably). you only find out because you were putting something on his desk after you left and got nosey, snooping through drawers rightfully so. Snooping specifically through a legal folder with your name on it. thinking it was only your onboarding papers and resume maybe. but it's surviellance pictures of your home. your parents background and history. yearbook pictures of you.

anyways, i need that-

[loversagile]

reader trying to convince joe to quit smoking because she hates it.. i feel like he could be kind of stubborn about it

I’m basing my request on that new photo of joe holding cig when he was in paris in january, i don’t know if you saw that already😭

He stood on the balcony of the hotel suite. Grey sweatpants hanging low on his hips and plain white t-shirt tight on his biceps. You stood there staring at him for a whole minute at least. Taking in the sight of him just standing there. His gaze casted down to the city life buzzing beneath us.

Then smoke bellowed from between those pink lips and you rolled your eyes with the right corner of your own lips tugging upwards. Tale as old as time. Busy night. Too many people. It always made him smoke afterwards. A stress reliever, he called it. You knew what he went through was stressful. You would never deny that. You just wished he'd use other outlets.

"Those things are so bad for you..." You muttered as you stepped up behind him. Your movements so quiet he jumped at the feeling of your arms sliding around his middle. Your cheek rested against his shoulder blade.

"Everything's bad for me." He huffed out as he flicked the cigarette and put out the end on the railing. Then his other hand settled over my forearm. Warm, steady, and already trying to apologize for the bad habit.

"Not true-" You muttered against his clothed back.

He didn't argue his side today. Just rubbed his hand over your forearm. Chatter filled the air. Car horns followed. It was never quiet here in the city. You had learned that quick. Joe seemed to love the noise and hate the silence. You were the opposite.

"There's other forms of stress relief." You muttered. Lifting your head from his back to press your lips against the middle of his back. Then pressing your forehead against the middle of his back.

He huffed out a breath that sounded almost like a laugh. His shoulders moved as he let it out. “Like what?” He hummed. Warm hand still rubbing over your forearm. The action more soothing for him than it was for you.

The moment of silence you let linger between the two of you caused him turn around in your arms. His lower half leaning back against the railing of the balcony. Hazel eyes peered down at you with a lazy tilt.

"Like you?" He muttered as his hand coming up to push your hair back behind your ear. "You wanna be my bad habit?" He muttered in a low, playful tone.

A smile tugged at your lips before you laughed softly at his attempt to dirty talk you. "That was hot. I gotta give that to you." You hummed. "But yeah, you could use me instead of cigarettes if you wanted to." You shrugged with nonchalance but fought away a smile.

"But you need to brush your teeth first-"

[djohours]

interesting pt 2

[moonstoneandmoonlight]

thinking about joe keery and his big hands wbu??

my favourite necklace

[valentine-night]

i’d like to add!

[charlisgarden]

Wait hold on wait wait hold on because wait hold on

[loversagile]

i’m going to force myself to sit down and write today

[dailyjoekeery]

takaymnk: Candid moments with @.djotime & @.b.i.g.s.h.r.i.m.p from @.postanimal in @.yokohama_chinatown, Yokohama.

[radical-ghostface]

[loversagile]

‘hi kids’ type shit

[kassy-djomunson]

why is this so fucking hot omfg

via avashaeofficial on tiktok

[loversagile]

oh my god. dying for more daddy!joe. how about baby’s first time being sick?

god, the first sniffle and coughing mess nearly has joe crying. his eyes grow misty and concerned as he watches the almost one year old propped on his hip, cough up so hard his face turns red.

“that sounds nasty..” he mutters softly as he rubs the baby boy’s back. his hazel eyes darting towards you.

the doctor visit isn’t any better. little baby boy is a stage five clinger when he’s sick and wants nothing to do with the doctor. he’s clinging to you or joe while sniffling and crying. then comes the shot. joe knows it’s their job and it’ll eventually make his baby feel better, but god the scream that fills the room makes him want to hurt somebody.

“shhh…” he hums against the baby’s temple as he holds him and rocks him. walking aimlessly around the small room. he’s humming against the baby’s ear as he watches you talk to the doctor.

a cold. would probably last a few days. if the symptoms persisted bring him back in.

joe took mental notes of all of it. the shot they’d given the baby would probably make him sleepy and the medicine tasted like bubblegum.

he doesn’t outwardly say it and neither do you, but he loves how clingy the little one is when they’re sick. the baby boy won’t let either one of you put him down. seeking out the comfort of both of you. joe indulges in the sleepy cuddles. holding onto him a little tighter than usual. knowing it won’t always be like this and before he knows it, the little boy will be grown and more independent.

[loversagile]

fwb!joe ? 🫣

unfortunately i dont think that man could do a friends with benefits relationship deal.

a month in and he’s asking you to stay over after you’d both gotten your fix. he’s spooning you after sex. he’s making you breakfast in the morning and waking you up with soft kisses across your bare shoulders and upper back.

that man is the most least nonchalant guy ever in the history of men and he’d end up saying ‘i love you’ mid thrust while his face buried in your neck. he wouldn’t even care either. he’d keep muttering it against your skin with lazy kisses on e he realizes you’re not running away or pushing him off.

[loversagile]

heyy! for daddy!joe could you do readers water breaking and how he would react? 😇

hi i’m coming out of hibernation for a brief moment.

joe is actually the type of person to freak the fuck out. like panicking, pacing, trying to find the pre packed hospital bag. he’s talking to himself. moving his hands in the way that happens when he’s nervous or overwhelmed. his hands start to talk for him.

“baby, the bag-“

he’s nearly on the verge of a panic attack.

and you.

you’ve changed your sweats and are standing in the foyer. the calmest he’s ever seen you. taking a sip from your new owala cup he’d gotten you the other day at the store because it had cherries on it.

“the bag is in the nursery on top of the changing table.” you tell him calmly. “go grab it, okay? i’m gonna go to the car.”

he stares at you for a split second like you’ve just grown an extra eyeball before his eyes. then his head slightly tilts like he’s trying to figure something out. in the movies, the woman is freaking out. screaming, crying, clutching onto the closest person with a death grip.

but you. you’re rubbing soothing circles over your belly through the loose shirt you were wearing. taking in slow, deep breaths. looking like an actual super hero standing before him.

he comes back to and moves towards you. hand coming up to cup the side of your head and tugging it towards his lips slightly. “love you.” he mutters against your hair. “grabbing the bag and meeting you in the car.”

suddenly he’s calm. he’s cool. he’s collected. and you’reactivelyinlabor. okay, calm down. he’s got this. daddy joe has got this shit.

[sc3ptre]

Hello, I really love your stories! is it okay to request a (THIS IS SO DISTINCT lol) joe keery x popstar!fem (secret/ lowkey relationship, only their friends and family knows) where joe keery co-produced sabrina’s song “sugar talking,” where he was the one who played the guitar solo and they wrote it together while tipsy in Joe’s studio, 2 in the morning, talking about their exes in the past, dumping it all in one song. AND months later, the song crazily blows up and it earned a Grammy nomination—and it actually won. When her name was announced, she’s still completely shocked. As she walks to the stage, she tries to drag Joe up with her, but he gently refuses because he wants her to have her moment. He just stays back, proud of her but letting her shine. As she went to say her speech, shock and surprised, lastly, she quote “since joe isnt coming up in here, his speech will be posted on instagram..” and the crowd laughed as same as joe (just smth funny lol)

And he did posted up in instagram

Thank you!

And the Grammy goes to...

Pairing: Joe Keery x fem!reader

⟡ Main Index | ⟡ Archive for Earth-0424

a/n: Lowkey unrelated but if I hear one more person suggest we're only obsessed with "Sugar Talking" bc of Coachella, I might go insane. That song went platinum in my house the DAY it was released.

Classification: fuff

Word count: 2k

Divider by me ;)

You thought you heard wrong when your name was announced, the sound of it echoing through the room in a way that didn’t quite register at first as though it belonged to someone else entirely, someone sitting at another table and living another life, and for a moment you stayed completely still, eyes moving from face to face as the room erupted around you in cheers and applause that felt distant and muffled.

Your gaze finally landed on Joe, already on his feet, clapping with that wide smile that always managed to reach you and something in your chest shifted as you slowly rose, your body moving before your mind could catch up.

You instinctively went straight to him like there was nowhere else you could possibly go in that moment, your hands finding him as his arms wrapped around you tightly, pulling you in with certainty that made your breath hitch. He held you so close you could feel the frantic rhythm of his heart against your own, the pressure of it almost overwhelming.

“Is this really happening?” you asked, your voice barely above a breath, hands gripping the fabric of his suit as the reality of it began to settle in waves that felt too big to hold.

“Go up there,” he urged softly, his hand pressing reassuringly at the small of your back as if he could physically guide you forward through the shock and noise. 

You pulled back just enough to look at him before your hand reached for his, fingers threading through his as you tugged him gently toward the stage, your expression shifting into something more insistent, more vulnerable. “You have to come up there with me,” you said quickly, your eyes widening the second you felt him resist, his hand tightening just slightly in yours before he shook his head.

“Joe, don’t do this, come on,” you added, almost pleading now, the idea of standing up there alone suddenly unbearable.

“It’s yours, go get it. I’ll meet you backstage right after, I promise.” he said, his voice calm, already having made peace with this decision long before the moment arrived. His smile didn’t waver, not even as he leaned in to press a soft kiss to your cheek, lingering just long enough to make sure you felt it. “You deserve it.”

Before you could argue again, his fingers found your sides, lightly tickling just enough to make you instinctively pull away with a startled laugh, your body reacting before your mind could and it forced you forward, toward the stage and the moment that was waiting for you whether you were ready or not.

People reached for you as you moved through the tables, voices overlapping in congratulations, hands brushing your arms, your shoulders, your back and it all blurred together into overwhelm, stretching the distance between you and the stage until it felt impossibly far. 

When you finally reached it, your hands trembled as you accepted the Grammy from the presenters, the weight of it settling into your palms in a way that felt almost symbolic, heavier than it should have been, heavier than you had imagined.

You stepped up to the microphone, your breath catching as the room quieted, your eyes instinctively searching through the crowd until they found him again, still standing where you had left him, still watching you like nothing else in the room existed.

You cleared your throat, your grip tightening slightly around the award. “Holy shit,” you breathed, the words slipping out before you could stop them, the microphone catching every bit of it as laughter rippled through the audience. “Um…first and foremost, I’d like to say that I shouldn’t be here alone, because certainly this…” you lifted the Grammy slightly, glancing down at it with a small, disbelieving shake of your head, “heavy as it is, its weight is a representation of every talented person that it took to make this song and the album. It really wasn’t earned alone.”

Your voice steadied as you spoke, your eyes flickering between the crowd and him. “I’m talking about my team, the ones that made it possible for me to be here today, my friends and my family and most importantly…” you let out a small, breathy laugh, your lips curving despite the tears that were beginning to gather, “someone who’s trying very hard to hide in the crowd…Joe Keery.”

A soft wave of reaction moved through the audience as you paused, the memory of that night settling over you so vividly it almost felt like you were back there.

“This song, in particular, stemmed from a Friday night where I needed a shoulder to lean on,” you continued, your voice softening, dipping into something more personal and fragile. “We all need that place where we can let words flow and emotions spill shamelessly without feeling like we’re bleeding in front of a shark.” You swallowed, your voice shaking slightly. “We talked...and got a little drunk,” you laughed through it, the sound trembling, “and reached the kind of honesty that breaks your heart a bit when talking about the love you give and never get back…and that genius over there grabbed a guitar and at four in the morning…this song was born.”

Applause filled the room again and you felt the tears spill over as you tried to keep going, your gaze locked onto him as if he were the only person you were actually speaking to.

“You are truly the sun after a storm,” you said, your voice steadier now in its vulnerability. “You bring the kind of light that makes you hope for an encore just to see it again.” You glanced down at the Grammy, your fingers brushing over its surface. “And I’m certain we’ll figure out a custody arrangement for this Grammy of ours. This is for you, for seeing art in desolation and for being my solace. Thank you, Joe.”

The room erupted again, even louder than before but you barely registered it as you were guided off stage, your vision blurred with tears, your chest tight with everything you had just let out.

By the time you made it backstage, everything felt like it was moving too fast and too slow all at once, people stopping you, congratulating you, pulling you in different directions as you tried to keep up, the weight of the Grammy still heavy in your hand as you moved. The hallway stretched endlessly, lined with framed photos and people rushing past, their voices overlapping, until you turned down another corridor and then another, the noise thinning out with each step until it was quieter, more manageable.

That’s when you finally saw him.

Your steps faltered for just a second, your heart dropping from the overwhelming high it had been suspended in as you moved toward him faster, a broken laugh escaping you as you reached him.

“You fucking coward,” you said, your voice cracking through the words as your hand grabbed the lapel of his suit and pulled him toward you, your lips crashing into his before he could respond.

He had been mid-laugh, ready to defend himself but the words died instantly as his arms came around you, pulling you in just as tightly as before, kissing you back with a warmth that made everything else fade away for a moment.

“You did so good. I’m so proud of you,” he murmured when you finally pulled back, his hands coming up to cup your face gently, his thumbs brushing under your eyes to catch your tears without smudging your makeup.

“Almost died a little up there,” you admitted with a shaky laugh, your breath still uneven.

“Yeah?” he smiled, his touch lingering, soft, careful. “Your speech was beautiful…it was starting to veer off into a love confession towards the end…I mean, at least that’s what I was told. I was too busy trying to regulate my heart rate,” he added, his voice light but there was something truthful beneath it.

Your shoulders shook with laughter, the tension finally breaking. “That’s what honesty gets you,” you said, holding the Grammy between you, though his attention never left your face.

“What was that you were saying about the shared custody?” he asked, his grin widening slightly.

“Well, you know,” you sniffled, trying to steady yourself. “Had to make it believable.”

“Yeah…I think it might have been a little too believable,” he nodded, a quiet laugh escaping him before his expression shifted, just slightly. “Thinking about declining my offer?” he asked, the humor still there but softer now, more tentative, the weight of the question lingering between you.

Just a few days ago, in a much quieter setting that now felt like a lifetime away, he had asked you if you would move in with him. It hadn’t been dramatic, hadn’t been planned with any grand gesture, just something that slipped into the conversation naturally. He had been careful about it, too, quick to tell you that you didn’t have to answer right away, that he knew your life was moving faster than either of you could keep up with, that there was no pressure, no expectation, just a thought he wanted you to have, something to consider when everything else slowed down.

But standing here now, with the echo of your speech still ringing in his ears and the weight of the night settling, he found himself asking again without really asking, the question woven into his tone, into the way he looked at you, needing to know if that future still existed in your mind the same way it did in his.

Your eyes met his, still glassy, your lips curving into a small, almost shy smile as you gave a slight shrug. “I was thinking of something more like…on my nightstand during the week and on yours on the weekends…” you paused just long enough to let it sink in, “in the same house.”

The relief that crossed his face was immediate, unguarded, his breath leaving him in a quiet rush before he leaned in, pressing kisses across your cheeks, your temple, your jaw, holding you close by the small of your back as you laughed, the sound softer now.

“That works for me. It’s perfect… you’re perfect,” he murmured against your skin.

Later that night, after the interviews, the flashing cameras and the afterparties you barely stayed at long enough to be seen, the two of you finally made it back, the quiet of it wrapping around you like something sacred. 

Clothes were shed without thought, dropped carelessly as exhaustion settled deep into your bones. Joe had offered to make you tea but by the time he returned with the mug, you were already asleep, curled into his bed like you had always belonged there.

He stood there for a moment just watching you, the rise and fall of your breathing, the way your hand rested loosely against the pillow, before he settled beside you, careful not to wake you. His phone slipped into his hand and it didn’t take long for him to find a photo to post on Instagram, one he hadn’t even realized had been taken at the time.

The two of you in his studio, late, comfortable, guitars resting on your thighs, your attention fixed on the notebook near you while he looked at you like you were something he still couldn’t quite believe was real.

He stared at it for a moment before typing, the words coming easier than they ever did out loud.

“They say you won’t find the place in which you belong until you make it, but what happens when that place knocks on your door at 2am? Then ‘home’ is no longer the first place you run from but the place that will always reach for you. You are more than a muse, more than the notes we put together to make this song…you are music itself. You’re art, the kind you’re meant to admire from afar and think about kindly when you believe you won’t love again, letting the admiration for it thread itself into every thought that inspires you, until it owns you in the same way you own my heart.

To my best girl, Y/n, because the sun shines in hopes to reach you. I love and adore you.”

a/n: If you enjoyed this, consider saving the archive. More stories are coming, and requests are always welcome! Likes, reblogs and comments help others find my work and mean more to me than you know. Thank you so much for reading 💛

[loversagile]

hi hi hi, could you maybe write something with reader recently being terrified to fall asleep? like just the thought of falling asleep and not being in control of her body terrifies her and joe comforts her to sleep? maybe he plays with her hair, sweet kisses, sweet murmurs?

idk it sounds so crazy but this has been happening to me for the past few weeks and i’m literally fighting my sleep so hard cause i get so anxious about sleeping? idk

do whatever you choose <3

i'm actually so glad someone said this because me. i used to just stay up for days because of the thought of death. i have to take melatonin like very night now to make me fall asleep (i know so bad sue me).

----

he never really noticed it before. he figured you were just a night owl. he only noticed how the tv stayed on all night until morning when you stayed over instead of turning itself off like it usually did. he only noticed how you would bury yourself against his chest as morning rolled around.

he didn't notice how you tensed up when he read off an article on his phone. another death amongst celebrities. no overdose.

"they just passed away in their sleep." he shrugged and scrolled through the article.

"something had to have been wrong though, right?" you sat up straighter on the couch beside him. your legs tucked to your chest as you faced him slightly.

he only shrugged again and switched to another article. "sometimes people just pass away in their sleep, baby."

he spoke the phrase so nonchalantly it made you feel physically ill. just like that? go to sleep and just never wake up? you stared at him for a moment before your eyes drifted somewhere else. your brain running rampant and your chest feeling excruciatingly tight.

nighttime came around and you had settled into bed before joe. lying flat on your back. eyes fixed on the ceiling. joe walked out of the bathroom, no shirt and a pair of shorts hanging low on his hips. even the sight of his chest hair couldn't distract you from the daunting task of falling asleep.

"you look like you're laying in a coffin." joe laughed softly as he tossed the covers back on his side of the bed.

"why would you say that?" you asked him immediately. your eyes pinning to him in distress.

he sat down on his side of the bed and turned his head to meet your angered eyes. but it wasn't anger. it was just covering for your anxiety.

"i was joking." he told you as if it was obvious. and it should have been. he stared at you for another moment before he shifted and laid himself down on his side facing you. his upper half propped up on his elbow. "what's wrong?" he asked gently.

"nothing." you huffed and tugged the cover up higher around your neck. "pass me the remote."

"no-" he shook his head. "tell me what's wrong."

you stared at him and then looked away to the ceiling. the sudden feeling of embarrassment washing over you. how were you going to explain you were scared to fall asleep? it was a task so simple that kids did it without thinking.

"i don't like going to sleep." you muttered and kept your gaze on the ceiling.

"neither do toddlers-" you glared at him and he held one hand up in a defensive manner. "kidding, kidding." he hummed. "why?"

god, this is embarrassing.

"what if i don't wake up?" you whispered and meet his eyes.

he stared at you like you had just spoken a foreign language. the thought had never really raised any red flags in his mind. it was always a possibility. it happened to people all the time. his thought process was that if it was going to happen, it was going to happen. nothing could stop things that were already set in motion.

"then you don't wake up..." he answered unsteadily and knew that wasn't the correct answer from your wide eyes. "i mean-" he backpedaled. "like you just, ya know... go to the other side."

"oh my god-" you groaned.

"okay, wait-" he said, his fingers reaching out to wrap around one of your wrists where you had covered your face. "what do you want me to say, baby?"

"anything, but death-"

"are you scared of dying?" he asked gently. his body instinctively leaning closer to yours.

you sighed but nodded reluctantly. your eyes adverting anywhere but him. he let out a soft sigh like he was skewering his brain for what to say.

"i don't like to sleep because of it." you whispered as you rolled on your side to face him.

his hand reached up and brushed against your cheek. he didn't look like he was judging you. just like he was treading lightly on the situation.

"a lot of people are, ya know?" he hummed softly. "it's like one of the most common fears amongst human beings. sometimes it scares me." he shrugged.

"it does?" you whispered softly.

"yeah, but not like i don't wanna die-" he said, his eyes fixed on where his fingers were playing absentmindedly with the ends of your hair. "more in way of i don't want to leave you."

your heart physically fluttered in your chest at his soft words. he had no idea how heartfelt they even were. he was just speaking his truth.

a quietness settled over the two of you for a moment before he let out a soft sigh. "how about this?" he hummed softly, gaining your attention. "i'll stay up until you fall asleep."

"you promise?" you whispered softly.

"pinky." he answered immediately as he jutted his thumb out in the space between the two of you. "c'mere..."

he rolled over onto his back and opened his arm out for you to bury into his side. you draped your leg over his hips and tangled your legs together. his hand behind you trailed up and down your back in a soothing manner. his heartbeat echoed in your ear that was pressed to his chest.

"i got ya..." he whispered softly.