To understand the dream is to understand myself. @lucentillusion-blog - Tumblr Blog

{I wonder whether I should resume this blog. Is anyone still around?}

#It seems I may be in the mood for it again...#But perhaps a soft reset?#OOC

—[☸]—I've given up on trying to stay awake; I can't be afraid of everything anymore. I'm going to face my dreams and learn what I can. Maybe I'll finally understand what my life means. I'll try my best to keep pressing forward. I'll try to remember what I've learned about the worlds.

There's something to find in every one, as far as I know.

Second worlds exist beyond the first ones. They also have effects.

Time passes oddly. Sometimes Poniko can tell I've been gone a long time, and other times not.

The same dream worlds always connect to each other, though the connections don't seem to have a discernible physical layout.

Other people can access the dreams; they can mesh with the dream worlds of others.

That's all I remember for now. I hope my friends remember me; I can't say I've been a very good friend myself. I hope they can recognize me... My hair is starting to thin and fall out. It doesn't show as badly in braids. Maybe the braiding keeps some of the hair from having the chance to come out? I find them all over my carpet when I clean; I've been avoiding brushing it because it comes out in handfuls if I do. The skin of my hands looks almost translucent, and it must mean I don't look well. I can see my veins clearly. They're green, though I read that they're supposed to look blue. I hope I don't look too unpleasant. I must try to smile more.

I don't like to look at myself. My clothes are starting to hang more loosely than they used to; if I didn't know better I'd think my favorite sweater has grown two sizes. It doesn't make me feel any better. My body still makes me feel sick. I wish I hadn't developed so early... I wish I hadn't developed at all. I wish I was flat and smooth and harmless like I was when I was little. I wish I wasn't so gross.

I wish I could squash and mold myself like a gum eraser. I wish I could shrink and scatter and hide like a nest of mice. Instead, I'm curved and lumpy and disgusting, like a fat toad. I feel like there's no reason for me to be here. I'm not smart enough or pretty enough or virtuous enough to accomplish anything at all. All I can do is dream, and I fail at that, too.

I feel sick again. I'm going to go to sleep— as though I ever did anything else.

#diary entry #body image tw #emetophobia tw #negative ic #depression tw

"Um... I'm here... Hi..."

#ic #sorry I was gone so long

"I feel... kind of happy today. I hope I stay like this. It's nice."

#ic

Do you consider any of your alternates to be your friend? If you do, don't you find it a little weird how you're technically being friends with /yourself/?

"Ah...?"

"Yes... I do think they are, uh... friends... It's not that weird... I talk to myself a lot anyways. I guess they just put up with me since I'm another of them."

#Anonymous

mitamare-deactivated20151108

PLEASE REBLOG THIS IF YOU'RE A YUME NIKKI RP BLOG (or similiar!)

I need to follow more Yume Nikki blogs (that includes fangames + similiar games). You can also reblog even if you’re not (to spread the word would be helpful!), I’ll make sure to check out anyway. uvu <3

Similiar games may include

ALL fangames

IB

The Mirror Lied

To The Moon

LIMBO

etc!

(psst I also have a love for Ace Attorney, DRAMAtical Murder, 999: Nine Hours, Nine Persons, Nine Doors, EVERYTHING DONE BY SATOSHI KON, Amnesia: the Dark Descent, Assassin’s Creed, Death Note, Ergo Proxy, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, Guilty Gear, Ghost in the Shell and Madoka Magica so reblog if you’re one of those too~)

#ooc

preciousghoul-blog

#trapped in thought

memocacola-deactivated20160111

lucentillusion-blog

It’s been only a month since I’ve had Memoca but i’d like to thank everyone for their support and love in this fandom!

Honestly, this is probably one of the nicest I’ve EVER been in!

I probably wouldn’t have even made it through this blog if it hadn’t been for some people, though! And by god, there’s a lot.

SOME Inspirations—

ostentatiousorca - One of my bestfriends! Always manages to bring me up when i’m down on the ground! The wings I need when I can no longer fly! Also we made an awesome AU between Old and Idate.

redstainedsea - UHM OK LOOK I’VE LOOKED UP TO XAVI SINCE I STARTED TUMBLR OK. FABULOUS ARTIST. FABULOUS RPER. FABULOUS EVERYTHING.

kcxlb - heavy wheezing wow absolutely fabulous Kclab, honestly is probably the one person who got me to play Gray Garden, ngl.

demonmaxwell - Ok so listen here. I’ve been terrified to talk to Maxwell here since, well, I had my own Max blog. Different Maxwells but still! Really nice, despite the shitlord demon. 500000 do reccomend if you want despair and Swagwell.

aquatichellraisers - I typed that url so many times my phone automatically types it out as soon as I hit the letter A. Really really nice, made me feel extremely welcome when I first joined! Samekichi and Fukami are fantastic, and are just plain adorable.

red-starlight - OK OK OK LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING. lEIKO BABE HERE IS ONE OF THE REASONS I CONTINUED WITH MEMOCA OK. SHE’S A RAY OF SUNLIGHT WHEN I WAS SO NERVOUS ABOUT MY PORTRAYAL OF THIS SEAGULL BABE HERE. SHE;S AN ANGEL AMONG ANGELS

moonlightseashine - ok ok ok now here’s nother person i’ve been following for forever ok. I’ve been talking to Wadda here since my Masada days ok. That’s like a year ps ok. ok. Always making my day shine by doing or saying something. I always look for this babe on my dash. Ily WAdda ur my main squeeze

Honorable Mentions!!!

palecoulisses akataishi anorcaonastroll polariskuma rxspbel scaredycatshark anxiusdelphini askmemoca pitchawitch yumechenso thetaintedwitch thewaywardancestor thepreciouswitchwhowaited shxrkfry sharkbxy sharkfinpunch entertainmates fukxmi zelotypus thewalkingweapon golittlesleepwalker thepacifish cantuplacidum atatakami therusteddreamer umiinomajo thecorpsewhale lucentillusion uxmi uomi-hime nopuzzleleftunsolved vengeful-shark shirocidae repayyourdebts scaredydolphi

There’s definitely many more people that should be on this list, and I’m really sorry If I missed you guys at all!!!!

Thank you all so much for you support!!!

—- ♥ Munoca

#I'm on a follow forever!#I squeaked #ooc #thank you!

[I have somewhat of a large headache. Hello, everyone. I'm here again...]

#ooc

therusteddreamer

Closed

Today was not a good day, the Rust was flaring up and Sabitsuki could definitely feel the effects. Getting out of bed was nearly impossible. Just from logging into the .Flow, Sabitsuki could just tell the Rust was taking over. She slowly walked to the door and entered the Nexus, the floor was it’s normal white color, but someone was in there.

Today is not the day, this poor person is in serious danger being here.

(Pipe effect: Equipped)

Sabitsuki could barely walk over to the stranger in the nexus, she used the pipe as a walking stick.

"Hello, how did you get here? This place is my Nexus in the .Flow, may I ask your name?"

She thought for a moment.

"My name is Sabitsuki…"

Please be a human, I can’t deal with a monster or a hallucination today.

lucentillusion-blog

The white color was a little harsh for Madotsuki's eyes, but she lingered in the Nexus, not wanting to try any of the doors in case she wasn't supposed to be there. When the new dreamer entered, Madotsuki stayed silent, perfectly still except for the twisting of her hands.

So this was another Sabitsuki? The girl didn't look particularly strong to her. She was so much smaller than Sable or the other Sabitsuki she'd met before... perhaps she was a younger alternate? She seemed to lean fairly heavily on the pipe she carried... Madotsuki hadn't seen either of the others do that. Was something wrong?

She looked away and began twisting the end of her left braid. "My name is Madotsuki, and I'm dreaming myself here... Uh... I hope it's alright. I couldn't really... ask permission, or anything."

#therusteddreamer #yes she has met two!#i'm sorry for taking so long #also you are the cutest sabitsuki i've seen in a while