it's disorienting when you beat me with a shovel
trying on a metaphor

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
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if i look back, i am lost

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@whatdoyouseemartin
it's disorienting when you beat me with a shovel
Happy Shovel Day to those who celebrate! Remember to give your friendly neighborhood vampire a good BONK on the head it keeps them humble.
While Dracula gets a physical and mental snare around Jonathan pretty quickly and brutally, I do like to read a little subplot into the beginning of Dracula in which Jonathan does, briefly and without knowing it, give Dracula a metaphorical heart attack.
On May 7th, Jonathan writes that Dracula is away for the day, and in the evening Dracula joins him to converse. Jonathan asks him some questions about what happened on his trip in:
...I asked him... for instance, why the coachman went to the places where he had seen the blue flames. He then explained to me that it was commonly believed that on a certain night of the year—last night, in fact, when all evil spirits are supposed to have unchecked sway—a blue flame is seen over any place where treasure has been concealed.
And like. The coachman is Dracula. Dracula was marking the places where the treasure was.
Dracula is looking for the treasure.
Perhaps he even spent part of that day looking for the treasure.
And guys, when Jonathan asks some more questions, like why no one's dug the treasure up already, Drac says (perhaps in an almost frustrated tone):
"Because your peasant is at heart a coward and a fool! Those flames only appear on one night; and on that night no man of this land will, if he can help it, stir without his doors. And, dear sir, even if he did he would not know what to do. Why, even the peasant that you tell me of who marked the place of the flame would not know where to look in daylight even for his own work.
Guys. He can't fucking find it.
But then he asks:
Even you would not, I dare be sworn, be able to find these places again?"
And when I read this line I always imagine Dracula like, leaning forward in his seat, looking very intent.
But then. Jonathan answers with:
"There you are right," I said. "I know no more than the dead where even to look for them."
And I just imagine that Dracula must be shitting his pants at this point. Because this could just be an incidental turn of phrase, but also. To one like Dracula, who is well-versed in delivering threats through implication beneath a thin veneer of cordiality, this certainly sounds like this nobody of a newly-minted solicitor has 1. already clocked you as undead, 2. nonchalantly let you know that he knows that you're undead and 3. just insulted you over your inability to find your treasure to your face.
Jonathan literally doesn't describe any of the conversation after this point, so Drac must have played it cool enough to avoid catching Jonathan's attention but hooo boy. Must have been sweating bullets there wondering who the hell he'd just let into his house.
And of course, it actually is just a turn of phrase, and Dracula does have the upper hand and is free to psychologically strangle Jonathan with it for weeks upon weeks.
And on June 25th, Jonathan gets into the Count's room and we get a conclusion to our subplot:
The only thing I found was a great heap of gold in one corner—gold of all kinds, Roman, and British, and Austrian, and Hungarian, and Greek and Turkish money, covered with a film of dust, as though it had lain long in the ground. None of it that I noticed was less than three hundred years old. There were also chains and ornaments, some jewelled, but all of them old and stained.
He foundt it 👍
you either die a prisoner, or live long enough to see yourself scale the walls like a lizard
at the club no drinks.in.fully stone cold sober: what if thsre was a secret city
Face twists with bravery as a chill runs through the air We have to find it.
We have to find it
Thinking today about how Dracula could be read as a critique of British society and social norms because nearly every time someone follows those they or someone else end up royally fucked.
thinking very hard about Mr. R.M. Renfield on this day (dracula daily folks who don't want spoilers, stop reading here!)
Today's Daily Dracula is another example of how I think a lot of the film adaptations have failed to capture the true horror of Dracula because this scene is SO upsetting. It is quiet and cruel in such a beautiful way.
Harker believes he has successfully squirreled out a few letters to a camp of travelers who will post them for him.
Then our man the Count comes in with the letters and is so expertly and subtly impressing upon Harker just how fucked he is, just how little power Harker has. This, as though past moments haven't been, is the time at which I would lose ALL hope.
Stoker ends the chapter with another banger line:
"Despair has its own calms."
basically the best thing any character can do is decide they don't want to be afraid anymore - in fact they never want to be afraid of anything ever again - and take action so drastic they fail to realise that this too is a decision motivated by fear. or to account for the Consequences of that.
I usually disable all the health stuff in the iPhone Health app but i opened it today check something completely unrelated when i decided to scroll down the "All Health Data" section and i've apparently fallen down a lot?? on one day in January 2015 in particular
Why couldn't Kate Bush do a song for every Gothic novel. I want to hear her Frankenstein
Agnus Dei
25 May. - Cannot eat, cannot rest, so diary instead.
Victor Frankenstein syndrome aka you spent nights over nights crying and bleeding over this work and now that it's finally done you're just like "nvm. it's trash" and go to bed
top ten WORST seward aura loss moments
1 getting called bitchless by his old college teacher in front of his crush (who rejected him)
2 sitting on his hat before confessing to said crush
3 playing with a bloodletting knife while confessing to appear cool. crush said the way he did that almost made her scream
4 referring to himself as 'your pet student' in front of his old college teacher and asking to become it once again
5 overestimating the strength needed to break down a door with a few others and falling headlong into the room
6 calling one of his patients his 'pet lunatic' (he uses a phonograph as a diary, which means he had to say that OUT LOUD)
7 when he used a ladder to cross a wall while a man 30 years older than him effortlessly climbed it
8 getting his ear pulled by his college teacher as if hes still a student
9 being absolutely BEWILDERED after one of his patients had a positive reaction to someone being nice to him
10:
people are sleeping on just how funny the image of dr seward playing with a lancet while he's proposing to lucy is. for reference, here's what lancets (often used as a bloodletting tool, wink wink) in the 19th century would have looked like:
lucy says he's doing this 'when he wanted to appear at ease' like ah yes, our very suave suitor sits on his own silk hat and then proceeds to toy with an incredibly sharp medical tool to y'know. appear very cool and charming in front of the girl he's in love with. add to that he's playing with it 'in a way that nearly made [her] scream' so he is patently not doing a very good job with it. congratulations to jack seward for having the universal experience of fumbling in front of your crush while desperately fidgeting with something to look cool.
I love that there were butterfly lancets back in the day. I bet Dr. Jack was doing a bunch of ridiculous flips and spins and shit. Just tossing it around like a greaser headed for juvie in a fifties teen flick. He's giving West Side Story. He has no idea this isn't completely normal.
what jack thinks he's doing to seduce the girl of his dreams:
vs. what lucy's actually seeing as jack pours his heart out to her:
omg. mina. girl. you won't BELIEVE the size of his lunatic asylum.