just to the right of the influence

[heavenhillgirl]

[mischon]

[klassizismus]

by Jules Tavernier (French, 1844-1889)

[capacity]

People: *showering me with compliments* Me: okay but what about that one negative comment I received June 6th 2003 ? Im trash sweetie

[soym8-deactivated20161228]

me online shopping: *violently comes out of a trance* what have I done…

[12281956-deactivated20160824]

all these pop songs about “doing work” and “work work work” make me feel like i’m in some heavy-handed YA dystopian novel where the evil capitalist overlords keep the proletariat in line with brainwashing/propaganda in song form

[crazycatladyinwaiting]

[kiszkamoon]

so today i found out that i’m allowed to carry a knife with me to school as long as it’s smaller than 3 ½ inches but i still can’t show my shoulders and if thats not a perfect description of american schooling idk what is

[lucasnoahs]

COVER YOUR SHOULDERS WITH KNIVES

[teacrumps-blog]

Shoulder blades.

[karasratworld]

Dylan really loved the Budweiser puppy ad

[dogsaremypatronuspersonal-blog]

Are you kidding me that’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen I’m crying. I’m actually crying over a dog watching a puppy and a horse on tv someone stop me.

[ellway]

I’m literally crying what is happening that was the sweetest shit in the world.

[dennisxnerd-blog]

[jacoblivengood]

[mohicaaa]

[xsaturnix-deactivated20170804]

[hypothetical-happiness-blog]

[nelladee]

Know your roses guys Or you just might fuck up the moment

[gothzarya-deactivated20220622]

and you dont want to do that ._. 

[aeloro]

salmon is for desire

[breethingout]

what am I looking at

[shigatsuyuutsu-blog]

I can’t even remember how many times I’ve reblogged this anymore

[eddiethawne]

[jasonhorton]

[vincent-van-g0gh]

because the giant “f” on an app called Facebook didn’t make sense before thank god we have discovered this I was so confused but now I am enlightened

[sixpenceee]

“A house I pass on the way to work has this sculpture in its yard. Its about 8 feet tall.”

(Source)

[geostatonary]

“HELLO NEIGHBOR STEVE, I WOULD LIKE TO INVITE YOU TO BARBEQUE ON THE EVE OF THE BLOOD MOON.  I FEEL WE GOT OFF TO A BAD START.”

“NEIGHBOR STEVE, DO YOU NOT WISH TO PARTAKE OF THE UNCLEAN FLESH-MEATS OF PIGS AND THE POLLUTED ESSENCES OF TOMATO?  PERHAPS YOU ARE A CAROLINA STYLE MAN, NEIGHBOR STEVE?”

“PUT THE GUN AWAY NEIGHBOR STEVE, YOU KNOW I SHALL ONLY RISE AGAIN WITH THE DAWNING OF THE MOON.  WE HAVE BEEN THROUGH THIS MANY TIMES.”

“LOOK AT THIS PICTURE MY SON DREW OF YOU AND CHILD TIMMY, YOUR SON.  ARE THEY NOT THE PICTURE OF PACT-MATES?  THIS COULD BE YOU AND ME, NEIGHBOR STEVE.”

“YOU MISSED THE UNHOLY NEXUS OF POWER THAT IS THE KEY TO MY CORPOREAL FORM, NEIGHBOR STEVE.  YOU WILL NEED TO RELOAD NOW, SO I WILL GO INSIDE TO MY HELL-WIFE AND PUT YOU DOWN AS A SOLID ‘MAYBE’.“

[erinnightwalker]

I have the feeling that the families get along great except for Steve. Like, the wives are baking (questionable) brownies together, the kids are playing together, Antler Guy occasionally takes Son and Timmy to school (no car, just carries them in huge swinging strides through a nexus of ungoldly sights in a swirling netherworld shortcut. Sometimes they stop for McDonalds). Hell-wife gave them a potted Audrey Jr., Steve’s wife (who I now christen Sharon) gave them a begonia.

One time Steve tries throwing holy water but all Antler Guy does is thank him, saying that no, Antler Guy isn’t Catholic but it’s the thought that counts, he is so kind to water his creeping deathshade vines regardless.

For Christmas Antler Guy gives Steve a case of ammunition. To be funny/sarcastically mean Steve gets Antler Guy the world’s most hideous Christmas sweater, singing light-up reindeer included. He immediately regrets it because not only does Antler Guy love it and wears it for several months, it will never need batteries because Antler Guy powers it with his own eldritch aura.

When they come back from a holiday to Hawaii, Steve is horrified to find out Sharon bought them matching Hawaiian shirts. He is even more horrified that his wife means it that if he doesn’t wear it he will forever sleep on the couch.

[niiv]

This is the best.

[traceytonight]

[paleosteno-deactivated20191020]

What the FUCK