also dork for every other verse ๐ค but we'll say mafia for the ask lmao
Send in aย Pet Nameย /ย Nickname for Andreiย | Accepting
"You are the only one who can get away with that, I hope you know that. No one else can get away with that, but I feel letting you know this is too much power at the same time."
Send in aย Pet Nameย /ย Nickname for Andreiย | Accepting
"I do not know how you haven't run out of nicknames by now or how you keep coming up with these things but at this point I have no choice but to accept what you have to say because I know by now I can't stop you. Even if I want to."
A small hint of a smirk tugs at his lips as she practically leaps into his arms, her lips claiming his over and over. When she was done with that, lips traveled to plant kiss after kiss on his cheeks and nose and anywhere else upon his face she could find to give a little kiss. In between this little attack of her's, he actually let himself chuckle slightly and giver her a look. "What has gotten into you?"
this is the last i'm going to speak on this or any drama on this page as i understand things are going to spread after a post like that but then i'm truly done responding or even looking at anything like this regardless of intent in showing me .
i know that not everyone is caught up on all of the lore . there are people that have screenshots and whatnot of me saying some nasty things in various contexts regarding people i've had conflicts with in the past . i've said awful things in emotionally elevated moments , almost always in the context of believing i had a safe space to vent frustrations .
this is not a matter of mutually assured destruction , and if you think it is you're missing the point . the people i know are truly my friends are the people that would 1 understand the progress i've made as a person since even the most recent of these conflicts and allow me the space to either disprove or take accountability for and figure out how to learn from ANYTHING i've done that's hurt someone whether i knew it or not . but they're also the people who wouldn't be trying to escalate a conflict they know can only CAUSE fallout everywhere when we could all just peacefully coexist . there's a reason it's taken me so long to speak on a lot of this , and why i've withheld so much even now .
if i end up with a small handful or less of writing partners and an entire rest of the site that hates me that's fine , as long as i can be allowed the basic respect of having a space for those few people . that is quite literally all i'm asking for , and i hate that it took this to be heard . but i'm done being scared to do what i love based on different social mistakes that i have worked so hard to learn and understand and grow from . if you need to go thanks for the opportunity , and if you want to stay i appreciate you but don't feel obligated .
so i was apparently wrong . according to what ive been told there is some backlash and / or disbelief that i could possibly just want to exist in a place where i'm not constantly witch hunted and antagonized by multiple different parties ( based almost entirely on libel ) while i try to heal from my actual real human life , so i just figured i should let you know guys know i finally tried to kill myself the other day ๐ค
out of fear of being made to look like someone attempting to play the victim when there are TINY crumbs of truth spread among outrageous rumors and lies based in pettiness and gossip and assumptions , i haven't said one word outside of a select few dms ( many of which are among the SEVERAL people who have made this post necessary ) about COUNTLESS malicious , toxic , and downright childish behaviors displayed toward me despite everything i've attempted to juggle in real life at the same time . and every safe space ive thought i had since the first huge trauma has turned out to not be safe for me . but that's apparently ENTIRELY my fault so once again i'll take accountability when no one else wants to .
i'm sorry that i've shared so much of myself on this site . i'm sorry that i've acted human and made mistakes . i have and will ALWAYS take accountability when i do something wrong , but what i will not do is continue to allow this to snowball to a place where i'm getting people telling me about attempts to antagonize me or destroy my character multiple times a week . i'm sorry that i'm so scared of conflict that i've let anyone and their mom say whatever they want about me and kept my mouth shut . and i'm sorry it took me this long to grow a backbone .
unfortunately i only have screenshots to disprove some of the slander that's been leveled toward me , and i honestly just don't even have the energy to expose everything i do have , so i'm just going to give y'all what i can to prove that i'm just trying to exist and do what i love . truthfully i'm not even sure why i'm giving the respect of retaining names but you know what ? everyone involved already knows who they are and how they've contributed and why , so it's not my goal to tear anyone down beyond clearing my own name .
and then i'm going to block anyone that i feel necessary to protect my peace , something you all love to champion until it's me doing it . and then i'm going to do some replies for the people i know know and care about me and continue to write characters i love and heal my relationship with media that's been all but ruined and run my page how i want to run it . and i'm going to be incredibly selective about who i open myself up to in the future .
this place is my escape from shit you guys know absolutely nothing about and i will not let snowball fallout from mistakes i made in the past and petty behavior over who i write with ruin that for me . i just wont . if you need to go unfollow or block after reading any of this have at it , i am perfectly content to write with the people that have bothered to get to know and understand my true character .
when i abruptly downsized earlier this year , keeping the partners and threads i found it easiest to keep up with at that moment in time while shrinking for the sake of my mental health , this was my response when the ONLY PERSON i didn't refollow that actually tried to figure out what was going on came to me in my inbox .
and this was my response when i found out that person lied and told everyone i didn't say or explain anything .
an ex of mine made an attempt to paint me as a crazy former rp partner who " never cared about him " when he was " friends with me out of pity " after finding out i told less than a handful of people about some incredibly manipulative behaviors that admittedly , bred toxic behaviors of my own . without going into detail , the narrative painted is demonstrably exaggerated and at least partially falsified . existing mutuals who would like to know which FEW parts were true are still free to message privately .
this is an OUTDATED list of the confirmed urls that have been used to stalk and antagonize me by the same person earlier this year when i became what i thought was friends with someone they were close to . i will not be addressing anything further regarding that person ; regardless of what's been said or spread around , they and i both know that friendship was not healthy for either of us and they also know that this was a HUGE reason why .
some of you know that there have been several other attempts to lie about , slander , antagonize , and villainize me since then and honestly , i'm done even entertaining it . i've had this post ready waiting for the word that another witch hunt had started as soon as i started filtering more content from my dash via blocking / unfollowing / otherwise , and that's truly sad for an internet website that's supposed to be for fun . as always , existing mutuals that genuinely would like to stay mutuals but feel they need more information or have heard about anything i haven't addressed may message me privately but beyond that i'm done .
i am not now nor have i been acting maliciously or spreading rumors or creeping anyone's page ( despite the clear evidence i've seen and or been told about CONSTANTLY over the last year that several different people have been creeping mine ) since 1 i made the mistake of engaging in behaviors like that well over a year ago , and then on a MUCH smaller and incredibly human scale , 2 as a method of coping with treatment in a relationship that i did not deserve . and as much as i appreciate people keeping me informed on behaviors like those which make this post necessary out of concern , i just don't want to hear anymore about any of it . i'm good . i'm not going anywhere , but i realize that people don't like me and it's just not my problem anymore .
but i am holding boundaries this time instead of keeping everyone's peace but my own . i know this will make it's way to whomever it may concern so i'm going to tighten up my block list and then i'm going to keep loving on and writing with and making muses with and for the people that truly care about me and i'm done being afraid to do so . this has gone on far too long and been built upon by far too many people for entirely juvenile reasons and i'm simply done . again as always feel free to disengage ; i will no longer be promoting my pages or following almost anyone back . call it hiding or being fake or a terrible friend or whatever you want but as this community LOVES to point out : nobody owes anyone anything here .
I. i'm sorry i haven't really been on today it's been kind of insane irl and i've also been working on tightening up my space here the last few days ( i'm honestly not even sure if this is needed this time i haven't seen / heard anything to warrant it but just in case i want to say once again there's no ill will toward anyone !!!! just need my space a lil smaller than it already was so i can keep this place as safe and comfortable as possible in the midst of a lot of dark / triggering stuff irl ) ๐ค
II. I GOT MY BRAIN CELLSSSSS my mom drove over some scripts and ice cream and medical things i needed i'm loading the brain cells rn so hopefully i can start getting some things done in just a sec !!!!
III. i just also want to publicly shout out @razorfst in particular bc when i say dark i mean DARK and she has literally not one time today stopped making sure i was okay and doing whatever she could to make things easier / cheer me up and i've been so completely out of it i've barely even been able to acknowledge the effort and that's fucked ilysm ๐ญ๐ซถ
i think i'm getting my brain cells filled in a little bit so hopefully i'll be able to actually get some writing done but in the mean time we vibing heheh i might try and start after the video i'm watching emma's finally waking up a little bit ๐ญ๐
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