Donald Miller, Holly Warburton, L. M. Montgomery, E. M. Forster, Anne Sexton, Kaye Donachie, Anne Sexton, Emilio Hernandez Martin, Maggie Stiefvater, Nina MacLaughlin (The Paris Review)
“Four days,” Clark says, leaning against your kitchen counter like the most smug farm boy in the galaxy. “No sex until Friday. You can do that, can’t you?”
“Oh, I can,” you lie. You cannot. It’s not that you’re addicted to him—it’s just… fine, okay, you are. When your boyfriend is literally Superman, restraint isn’t exactly your strong suit. But you were still going to try.
You cross your arms, aiming for nonchalance. “You’re forgetting something, Smallville. I’ve got self-control.”
“Uh-huh,” he says, sipping his coffee like this is nothing. “You couldn’t even make it through Man of Steel Monopoly without—"
“That doesn’t count,” you cut in, cheeks warming at the memory. “You were cheating.”
“I was winning.” He tilts his head toward you, voice dropping low, “and you’re already thinking about breaking the rules.”
“I am not.” You absolutely are.
“I’m just saying,” Clark continues, “I think you’ll fold by Wednesday night.”
“Oh, please,” you scoff. “I’m making it to Friday. And when I win, you’re taking me to that seafood place in Metropolis. The fancy one.”
“Sure baby, if you even make it that long.” He said laughing, and it was warm and deep and did things to you that were going to make this whole “no sex until Friday” arrangement absolutely impossible.
“So,” you said, stepping closer until your chest brushed his arm. “If we’re doing this… what exactly counts as breaking the rules?”
Clark hesitated, his jaw tightening just slightly, which told you he hadn’t actually thought this through. “Uh… no sex. That’s all.”
Your smirk was wicked. “Define sex.”
“You know, sex.”
You tilted your head. “Right. But define ‘sex,’ Kent. Because I’m pretty sure you’ve got, like, Smallville Boy Scout definitions, and mine might be… broader.”
His eyes flickered down at you—quick, almost guilty—and then back up, “You know what I mean.”
“Mm. I don’t. Clarify.”
Clark sighed, that low, exasperated sound he made when you were purposefully annoying him and he secretly liked it. “No kissing where it counts. No touching where it counts. No…” His voice dipped lower, “…oral anything.”
You fought a grin. “Interesting choice of words.”
“Stop,” he warned, but his cheeks were pink now, which was almost as satisfying as getting him into bed.
“Stop what? I’m just trying to make sure we’re on the same page,” you said, running your finger in an absentminded little circle against his bicep. “So I could walk around the apartment in a towel after a shower, dripping water everywhere, and that wouldn’t be breaking the rules?”
“That’s… not—” He coughed. “That’s not technically sex, no.”
“Or I could sit on your lap during movie night. Totally innocent. No rules broken.”
Clark’s jaw flexed again. “…Right.”
“And if I… oh, I don’t know…” you leaned in so your lips were just brushing the shell of his ear, “…accidentally moaned your name in my sleep?”
He turned to look at you fully, and the shift in his eyes made your knees a little weak—like you’d just poked at the Superman side of him instead of Clark. “You keep testing me, sweetheart, and Friday’s going to be very, very long for you.”
“Bold of you to assume I’ll regret winning.”
He hums, all calm and unbothered, but you can see it—how his hand lingers on the counter, knuckles whitening just slightly. “You remember what happened the last time we made a bet?”
You try to play innocent. “Nope. No idea what you’re talking about.”
Clark gives you a look, the one that says he’s running through every single memory in his superbrain and knows you’re lying. “You ended up handcuffed to my bed for three hours.”
You snort. “And you loved it.”
“Mm.” His lips twitch, fighting a smile. “Not the point.”
“You’re right,” you say, sidling past him toward the couch, deliberately brushing against his chest on the way. “The point is that you’re going to be paying for my oysters and champagne by Friday night.”
He follows you—because of course he does—and drops onto the couch beside you. “And the point is that you have zero poker face.”
“Oh, please.” You grab the remote, flicking on Netflix. “I’ve got plenty of poker face.”
Clark doesn’t even answer—just drapes his arm over the back of the couch and lets his thumb graze the bare skin of your shoulder.
You last fifteen minutes before you start to squirm. He notices, naturally, and smiles faintly like the predator he’s pretending not to be. “Wednesday night, huh?” he murmurs, eyes on the TV.
You grit your teeth, leaning back into his arm like you’ve got something to prove. “Friday, Kent. I’m making it to Friday.”
And that’s when he leans in, lips brushing the curve of your ear. “Guess I’ll just have to make sure you’re good and restless until then.” You know, in that moment, you’re so fucked.
The next morning, steam still clinging to your skin from the shower, you tug on a thin silk night slip, one thaf is definitely not bet-friendly—and pad into the kitchen.
Clark’s already there, hair damp from his own shower, in a fitted blue t-shirt that makes your pulse do funny things. He’s sitting at the table, reading the Daily Planet on his tablet, coffee in hand, and working his way through a plate of eggs
You pause in the doorway, catching his eye for just a second, then—without breaking contact—you reach for the hem of your night slip and tug it up. Over your hips. Past your chest. And off.
Clark freezes mid-bite. Fork halfway to his mouth.
“Morning,” you say breezily, tossing the slip onto a chair and padding over to the laundry nook, bare ass bouncing. You bend tossing in towels with your ass high, knowing full well he can see everything. The air’s cool, nipples tight and aching, and you swear you hear him exhale a curse under his breath.
Laundry done, you saunter into the kitchen, open the cabinet, and pour yourself a cup of coffee like you’re not putting on a one-woman burlesque show before breakfast.
You take the mug to the couch and plop down next to him, crossing your legs. “Whatcha reading?”
Clark doesn’t look. “News brief. Morning update for the Planet.”
“Mhm.” You sip. “How’s that going?”
He swallows, jaw tight. “Fine.”
The silence stretches. You shift, scooting an inch closer. Then another. Until your thigh brushes his. His voice is slightly hoarse now. “Sweetheart—”
“Can I have a hug?” you interrupt.
“Not a good idea.”
“Didn’t ask if it was a good idea.” You set your coffee down and slide into his lap before he can react, straddling him.
Clark’s hands fly to your hips—not to pull you closer, but to keep you in place—as if that’s somehow going to help. You loop your arms around his neck, leaning in until your breasts press against his shirt. “It’s just a hug, Smallville. Not breaking any rules.”
Clark’s eyes are locked anywhere but on you, like he’s memorizing the wood grain of the coffee table. His thumbs flex against your hips before he catches himself and goes still. “You’re—” His voice comes out rough, like gravel. He clears his throat. “You’re naked.”
You tilt your head innocently. “Am I?”
He gives you that look—the one that I’m two seconds from throwing you over my shoulder. “You know you are.”
“Right. Which… is fine.” You shift just enough that the movement drags your nipples across his chest. “Because being naked isn’t against the rules.”
The rest of Tuesday is… fun. For you. For Clark, it’s some kind of Herculean test of willpower.
By Wednesday morning, you’ve traded the silk night slip for nothing but one of his button-ups—and not much else.
By Thursday, you can tell he’s hanging by a thread. Which is exactly why you push.
That night, you’re in bed together. You’ve been good—technically. No touching “where it counts.” No breaking the rules. But as he scrolls through something on his phone beside you, broad shoulders relaxed against the headboard, you get an idea.
You start slow—just sliding a hand over your own stomach under the blanket. Then your fingers drift lower. You bite back a sound, but the mattress dips as his head turns. “Sweetheart?”
“Hmm?” You keep your eyes closed, breath soft and uneven now.
Clark freezes. “What are you—” His voice drops. “Oh, no.”
“Not breaking the rules,” you murmur, lips curving. “I’m just… helping myself sleep.” Within seconds, your fingertips find slick heat, and your hips give a tiny involuntary roll. The sound that slips past your lips is embarrassingly needy. You hum, teeth catching your bottom lip. You keep going, rubbing slow circles, your breath catching in quiet, uneven little gasps.
His phone’s still in his hand, but his jaw is tight now. “You trying to get me to lose?”
“Mm,” you breathe, eyes closed. “Not… technically…”
The blanket shifts over you as your hips move again. Your whimper is quiet but not quiet enough. Clark groans under his breath, rolling to face the opposite direction like distance will save him. “You’re impossible.”
You smile to yourself, dragging your fingers lower, dipping into your own heat. The slick sound is filthy in the quiet room, and the next moan that slips out is louder. He inhales sharply through his teeth, but doesn’t move.
“Fine,” you pant, your own voice starting to shake with how badly you’re aching. “Guess I’ll just keep doing it myself… thinking about your cock instead of my fingers… about how big you’d feel inside me right now…” That does it. His free hand shifts under the blanket toward his own waistband, and a second later you catch the faintest movement of his fist working over himself. Your hips stutter. “Clark—”
“Don’t start,” he grits out, jaw tight. “You started this game.”
You let out another moan, high and breathless, and that’s it—his phone clatters to the nightstand. In one motion, he’s on his side facing you, catching your wrist under the blanket and pulling your fingers from yourself.
“Move ‘em,” he orders, you barely have time to inhale before he’s replacing them with the hot, thick press of his cock, sliding in slowly. You moan, nails digging into his shoulders as he stretches you full.
Clark braces one palm beside your head, the other gripping your thigh so tight you swear you’ll feel it later. “Four days,” he murmurs against your ear, voice low and dangerous. “I made it four days with you teasing me like that. You owe me.”
Your nails rake down his back, earning a low grunt. “Fucking… knew you wouldn’t last,” you manage between moans.
Clark’s laugh is dark and breathless against your skin. “I lasted,” he pants, slamming into you harder. “You didn’t.”
You gasp when his hips snap forward, the headboard knocking against the wall. “I—” you start, but it melts into a moan.
“Could’ve kept my hands to myself,” he goes on, driving the words between thrusts, “but then you had to sit there and—god—touch yourself right next to me.” His pace picks up, his fist bunching the sheets near your head like he’s holding back from just railing you into the mattress.
His forehead presses to yours, sweat slick at his hairline, and his voice drops to a dark murmur that makes you clench around him. “God—fuck—” you whimper, the words breaking into a moan when his cock drags against that perfect spot inside you. You’re so wet now that every snap of his hips is filthy and loud under the blankets, slick and obscene.
“You hear that?” Clark groans, fucking you harder. “That’s how fucking desperate you are. Four days, and you’re dripping all over me like a slut who can’t keep her hands to herself.”
He bites down on your shoulder, groaning like he’s just as far gone, hips jerking into you with mindless, hungry force. “Gonna cum in you,” he grits out. “Gonna fill this perfect little pussy so deep you’ll still feel me tomorrow.” You choke out a cry, your back arching as your orgasm hits—sharp and devastating—your cunt pulsing around him, slick spilling down between your thighs. He fucks you through it, chasing his own high, his thrusts growing erratic.
When he finally eases back just enough to look at you, you feel the hot spill of him leaking out between your thighs. His fingers slip down, pressing against your swollen cunt pushing his cum back in making you jolt.
“Not done,” he murmurs, watching your face as he keeps moving inside you, slow and filthy. “I’m gonna fuck it deeper so you remember who you belong to.” And with that, Clark Kent—boy scout farm boy, world’s greatest hero—starts all over again, ruining you until you can’t even remember what day it is, much less who won the bet.
a/n: ive has the MOST stressful week but alas time shall go on and writing smut exists so staying alive can’t be that bad also super thankful for all of u whores
summary: penelope accidentally brought the wrong brownies- and you have a sweet tooth
a/n: i’m baaaaack! it’s been so long since i’ve last written so i figured i’d ease my way back into routine by writing a short little something. i apologize if it’s not great! my phone was broken for quite a while so im a bit rusty. feel free to send any requests!! and please don’t read if you’re sensitive to topics of marijuana :)
genre: fluff (established relationship)
warnings: accidental marijuana consumption, being under the influence of marijuana.
sweetheart. that was the nickname you’d been given by spencer on your first date. it didn’t just come from your kind and caring personality, it also came from your extreme love for sweets. it could be 7am or 11pm- and you’d always be in the mood for sweets.
everyone around you also knew of your sweet tooth. penelope, being one of your closest friends, liked to bake things and bring them into her office knowing you’d always have some. she often experimented with new recipes and had you be her personal taste tester.
“good morning pen!” you gave a gentle knock on her door before entering, noting that she was already glued to her computer screens. “hello hello hello my love, as wonderful as it is to have your illuminating self in my office i am so extremely busy and have no time for chatter.” her response made you laugh, knowing she had to have been busy since she was turning down a good yap session. “no worries! i’ll see ya later.” before you left her office- you noticed a plate of brownies on her desk. you silently grabbed one, stuffed it into your mouth, and shut her office door with a gentle click.
since there wasn’t a call for a case today, you and the others spent the day glued to your desks. it was rare to have a day to catch up on some overdue paperwork. about a half hour after your visit to penelope, you started feeling a little off. your chest felt lighter, noises sounded louder, and lights looked brighter. it wasn’t like you to get sick out of nowhere, so your first thought was dehydration. you stood up from your desk to grab some water, not even realizing you were walking into chairs.
“yo pretty boy, is everything okay with your girl?” the sound of derek’s voice made spencer look up from his computer screen. “uhm i think so? why wouldn’t she be okay?” spencer then glanced over to your desk, now noticing how it remained empty. derek slid his chair closer to spencer and leaned closer. “she’s been playing with the coffee pods for like 10 minutes now.” spencer followed derek’s gaze to see you, doing exactly what derek said you were doing. spencer watched as you giggled to yourself, stacking the small pods into a pyramid. “i’ll be right back.” and with that- spencer got up to check on you.
just as you were about to place the final pod on top of your triangular masterpiece, a hand on your shoulder made you gasp with a jump- knocking the structure over. you sighed before turning to meet your eyes with spencer’s. “hi sweetheart. is everything okay?” spencer’s gentle voice made you melt, your mind now being clouded with his overwhelmingly warm cologne and even warmer smile. “spencie! hiii. i was just building a tower! but i kinda knocked it over.” you looked back the mess of pods with a frown.
spencer could tell something about you was off. your tone, your body language, even the way you spoke. it was unusual for you to call him any kind of nicknames in the office. he stood in silence while he watched you now line the pods in color order. once you had finished you turned back to spencer and smiled. “i love you so much. you’re so handsome.” you reached up and started to play with his hair. spencer was perplexed by your behavior. he brought his hand to your cheek and studied your face while you stayed distracted by his curly hair. it was at that moment he noticed the small red tint to your eyes- and how your pupils were ever so slightly enlarged. it suddenly clicked. you were high. spencer couldn’t even believe it, you’d never mention anything of the sort to him. not once had you ever expressed to him it was something you would be interested in.
as if like clockwork, suddenly penelope comes in with a slight panic. “spencer! i-i need you to help me find y/n! i think she ate one of the brownies i brought in- only they weren’t the ones that were meant for here- i brought them in instead of the regular ones and now i think she may be under the influence of miss mary jane right now.” spencer stayed silent after penelope’s confession, letting her see that you were here and not loose in the office making a fool of yourself. “oh thank god you found her already.” spencer sighed as he looked from penelope to you. “okay sweetheart. i think it’s time we go home and take a half a day.” you frowned once more and took a step back from your boyfriend. “nooooo there’s so much to do! hotch will kill me if i don’t finish this paper work.” you tried to make your way back to your desk but a strong hand took yours. “the work can wait sweetheart, it’s time to go home.” spencer kept his tone extremely gentle with you, he always did. your eyes met his once more and you became weak in the knees- literally. spencer placed his hands on your hips as you started to loose your balance.
“can i have a kiss first?” your question caught spencer off guard, especially since the two of you were standing in the middle of your shared work place. he could already feel the looks of his coworkers watching the both of you. “you can have all the kisses you want once we’re home sweetheart.” spencer tried to get you to move, but you stood your ground. “no! i want a kiss spence.” you pouted and stood your ground, giving spencer your best attempt at puppy dog eyes. a pink hue spread across spencer’s face, coming to the conclusion he would have to kiss you in the middle of the bullpen. he closed his eyes and sighed before stepping closer, pulling you in, and giving you the kiss you’d been begging for. you smiled into the kiss and even stood on your tippy toes to try and match his height. spencer was quick to break the kiss once he heart the whistling and clapping of his friends. “okay you got your kiss now let’s get going.” you laced your fingers with his and wrapped your other arm around his. “anything you say spencie.” he gives you a smile before leading you to the elevator, and making sure you get home to your shared apartment to sleep off penelope’s baking experiment. needless to say, you started to become more cautious when it came to eating sweet treats.
so I was thinking, and have like this crazy request. what about early seasons Spencer with a writer girlfriend that writes a book where a character is inspired by him? And is such an amazing character, and the book is dedicated to him maybe? I just imagine him being like all flustered, but you can do it any way you can
hii thank you so much for the req i’m sorry it took so long! i kind of forgot about the early seasons part i’m sorry but i hope you still like it!
Dedicated To… // Spencer Reid🦉
synopsis: spencer is babysitting henry for the night and takes the opportunity to read him your new children’s book. he has a big realisation about your future together when he finds the surprise you wrote for him inside.
pairing: spencer x writer! reader
genre: SO FLUFFY!!!
wc: 2.6k
tags/ notes: uncle/godfather spence debut on my blog yay!! talks about having kids, not much else!! i really, really liked this req i hope i did it okay!! <3 ngl i only proofread this once so lmk if i missed any mistakes
masterlist // pls reblog if you enjoy it helps promote the fic so so much!!
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“How’s it going, Mary Poppins?” Spencer’s eyes fluttered shut as your tired voice floated through the phone. He’d offered to babysit Henry for the night when JJ’s sitter cancelled, sacrificing one of his nights off with you, not that you minded but he missed you nonetheless.
“It’s going fine actually, I’m just about to get Henry ready for bed.” He responded as he heard you suppress a yawn on the other side of the phone. “It sounds like you need to get some rest too.”
“No, no. I’m fine.” You murmured. “I wanted to talk to you for a little while I had the chance.”
“Honey, if you need to get some sleep-“
“Nuh-uh. Not a chance. Not without saying goodnight to you first.” Spencer laughed softly, picturing you at home sitting up against the headboard and restlessly moving your legs around under the sheets the way you always did when you were trying to keep yourself awake.
“Okay, fine. But straight to sleep afterwards alright?” He insisted as a smile climbed its way onto his face.
“You’re not babysitting me, you know?” You scoffed, arching a brow that he couldn’t see but felt regardless. “I don’t need you to read me a bedtime story or whatever it is you do.”
“Oh, that reminds me!” Spencer sat up excitedly, picking up the book beside him and resting it delicately in his lap. “I brought your book to read to Henry.”
“You did?” You grinned, touched.
“Yeah, I haven’t had a chance to read it yet and I thought this would be the perfect opportunity.” He ran a finger gently along its spine, recalling the months and months of your sleepless nights surrounded by storyboards and crumpled up pages scattered around every inch of the floor around you. He’d watched every step of the process as it tumbled out of your wonderful mind and he couldn’t be more proud.
“You don’t have to do that, Spence.” You said shyly, toying with the edge of your blanket. “I mean it’s just a kid’s book, it’s hardly one of those big, fancy classics you’re always reading.”
Spencer frowned, a defensiveness bubbling in his chest as he listened to you sell yourself short. “Of course I want to read your work, why wouldn’t I? Just because it’s a children’s book it doesn’t make it any less worth my time. You know there’s a lot of widely regarded children’s classics out there- The Secret Garden, The Wind In The Willows, Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland is a personal favourite of mine.”
You hummed self consciously despite his efforts, though your heart swelled at how much he cared. “Well, I don’t think mine is going to be up there with them any time soon.”
“It will be for me.” He shrugged, voice steady with pure honesty. “Because it’s yours.”
You let out a deep breath, shoulders collapsing as your heart melted completely. “Spence-“
“Uncle Spencer!” You were cut off by the distant sound of a tiny voice, followed by what sounded like even daintier footsteps bounding into the room.
“Hey, Henry! You ready for bed, buddy?”
“Can we read a story?” Over the line, you heard the sofa creak slightly under what you assumed was the young boy’s weight as he climbed up beside Spencer.
“Well of course we have to read a story first- in fact I’ve got a really special one for you tonight.” His voice dipped lower as he spoke as if he was sharing a sacred secret, causing Henry to gasp dramatically in anticipation.
“Really?” He whispered, and you smiled to yourself as you listened in on it all. If you closed your eyes you could picture the scene playing out in your own house, with your own children, watching in through a crack in the doorway as Spencer tucked them in for the night.
“Why don’t you go and get into bed and I’ll be there in a minute, okay?”
“Okay!” Henry cheered, hopping off the couch as the sound of his footsteps padding away sounded through the phone.
“I’m sorry, I have to go.” Spencer turned his attention back to you, a hint of sadness in his voice.
“Don’t be. Tell Henry I said goodnight, okay?” You yawned, stretching as you finally lay down in your bed.
“Of course I will. Do you promise to get some sleep now, too?” You laughed at his poor attempt at sternness as you pulled your blankets up over you.
“Yes, Spencer, I promise.” You giggled. “Goodnight, I love you.”
“I love you too.” Spencer echoed as he made his way towards Henry’s room. “I can’t wait to read your book.”
“Hmm.” You hummed, half asleep already. “Tell me what you think in the morning.”
He grinned at the sleep lacing your voice already, knowing your eyelids were following suit and falling shut as you spoke. “Goodnight, honey.” With that he ended the call, tightening his grip on your book in his other hand as he pushed open the bedroom door. Henry was already tucked beneath his Spiderman duvet, his nightlight glowing and ready as he scooted up slightly in an attempt to make space for Spencer’s long frame. He awkwardly slung his legs over the mattress as he sat down, resigning to having his knees uncomfortably tucked up rather than have his tall limbs hanging over the edge of the bed. As soon as he was settled, Henry nudged his arm up, slotting himself into Spencer’s side as he gently draped his arm around the boy’s pyjama clad shoulders.
“Someone very special to me wrote tonight’s book.” He said, lifting the book into his lap and tracing over the elegantly illustrated cover, his finger landing on your name at the bottom with a feather light touch. “Are you ready?”
Henry nodded against Spencer’s chest, clutching his stuffed animal closer to him as he cuddled in closer. As he flicked open the book, he felt a rush of pride surge through him, starting in his chest and racing out in every direction as he saw your work come together before him. Pages full of your imagination etched into paper rested beneath is fingertips as he read, beautiful penned illustrations catching his eyes no matter where he looked. The story itself was utterly charming. A young duckling had wondered from its pond, finding itself lost and alone in a looming woodland, caged in by trees and hedges as it tried to find its way back home. It encountered unfriendly squirrels, taunting foxes, threatening bears, sly snakes, wary deer and more frankly unhelpful creatures in its journey, growing more and more hopeless as the sky turned dark between the leaves of the trees. As the stars began to appear, twinkling one by one like tiny torches in the night, the sounds of hooting caught the lonely duck’s attention. It looked up to the trees once more to find an owl.
Peering at the illustrations, Spencer found that this owl had an air of familiarity about it. Its feathers were ruffled, especially atop its head, sticking out in every other direction as they blew slightly in the calm breeze of the night. On its chest it wore a bowtie- crooked and patterned with stripes- and over its caramel eyes that seemed to look over the duck with worry it wore a pair of glasses.
“Uncle Spencer?” Henry piped up, pointing a finger towards the page.
“Yes, Henry?”
“He kind of looks like you!” He giggled as he glanced up at Spencer, who’s messy nighttime hair was also sticking up against the pillows, his glasses slightly lopsided on his face where he hadn’t bothered to reach up and adjust them.
“You think so?” He cocked his head, peering closer at the drawing. Scattered around the branches were piles of books, some in stacks, some open and draped over twigs as they hung in the air. Their spines read a myriad of topics from woodland folklore to fungi to hare mythology, leaves in the middle of half of them like bookmarks. “I’m not sure I see it.” He mumbled as he turned the page, though the thought stayed in his head.
Throughout the rest of the story, the duck and the owl became a duo as the owl used its wisdom and its encyclopaedic knowledge of the woods to help the duck find its way back home. The owl had become worried when it spotted the duck waddling along by itself, knowing full well- in far too much detail- the dangers of the surroundings for such a vulnerable thing. Though he was shy and reserved, preferring to stay cooped up in its nest, the owl- ever the moral creature- accompanied the duck home chatting about everything under the stars as they travelled. By the end, the two were good friends and as the duck returned to the pond the owl promised to watch over it, brushing off any thanks as it humbly flew back to its nest.
A feeling he couldn’t quite identify flipped itself over in his stomach as he closed the cover of the book. Next to him, he felt Henry’s head grow heavy on his chest as little breaths turned into little snores, his hand abandoning his stuffed animal in favour of clinging to Spencer’s shirt. Spencer stayed still for just a moment as he held Henry, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest as he let his mind wander. He imagined what it would be like to be sat in his own house with his own children, tucking them into his side as he read them your stories as they drifted off to sleep.
After a while, Spencer carefully pulled himself away, gently tugging Henry’s arms from his shirt and pulling his bedsheets up over him instead. Silently, he made his way back to the sofa, grabbing the blanket and pillow JJ had left out for him before falling asleep himself with dreams of you in his head.
The next day when he pushed open the door to your shared apartment, you were already waiting for him curled up on the armchair by the window with a sketchpad in your hands.
“Hey, Spence!” You grinned, raising your arms up as he walked over, leaning over you and wrapping his arms around you tightly. “How did it go?”
“It was great.” He paused to kiss both of your cheeks as you giggled softly. “Henry’s a sweet kid.”
“Yeah?” You set your sketchpad down on the floor as Spencer perched himself on the armrest next to you. “Did he like the book?”
“It put him right to sleep.” Spencer started before catching himself. “-In a good way! Of course. I didn’t mean to infer that it-“
“I’m glad to hear it was a hit.” You rested your hand on his knee, patting it soothingly as he scrambled. “What did you think?”
Spencer reached into his bag, pulling the book out and holding it reverently like it was sacred. “I thought it was marvellous.” He spoke quietly, adoration in his voice. “You never fail to amaze me. I can’t even express to you how much I loved it.”
“Oh, Spence.” You gushed, butterflies in your stomach as you took his hand in yours. “You really think so?”
“Absolutely. It’s going up on my bookshelf front and centre. Pride of place.”
“But what about your shelving system?”
“Your work takes priority above any stupid shelving system.” He laughed softly, turning the book over in his free hand. “Actually, Henry pointed something out to me about one of the characters that I wanted to ask you about.”
“Oh, yeah? What was it.”
“The owl,” he began hesitantly, “he uh, thought that it looked like me.” He paused, licking his lips as he willed himself to continue but the embarrassment at the thought of being wrong began crawling up his neck, hot and flushed. “Was that- was it intentional? Or-“
“Yeah it was.” You beamed up at him, pulling your hand away from his and cupping his cheek where it had turned bright red. “I wanted to put a piece of you into my story. I hope that was okay.”
“Of course it was okay, I just-” he took a deep breath, collecting himself. “Why me?”
“My books are my life, Spence, and you’re a part of my life. The most important part of my life, actually. Of course I’m going to include you. The owl was supposed to be a guiding figure, someone kind and warm and smart and selfless who goes out of his way to help others no matter who they are.” You stood up, coming to stand between Spencer’s legs and draping your arms over his neck as his hands rested on your hips instinctively. “I thought who else but you?”
Spencer’s brain turned to mush, his mouth opening and closing as he frantically thought of what to say, but the emotions washing over him were too much.
“You okay?” You cooed, biting your lip in fond amusement as you watched the cogs turn in his head.
“I love you,” he croaked out eventually, “so much.”
“I love you too.” You pressed a kiss to his forehead as his eyes fluttered shut, a deep content sigh escaping him. “Did you see the dedication?”
His eyes shot open, brows furrowing as he reached for the book where it had fallen to the armchair’s cushion. “No, I must’ve missed it, how did I miss it?” He muttered as he flicked the cover open again. There, in an elegant curly script read:
“This book is dedicated to Spencer. My darling star in the nighttime. Thank you for always guiding me home.”
“This is-“ Spencer started, but the words got lost as they were chased out of his throat by the lump that formed instead. Tears stung his waterline as he blinked them away, never once tearing his gaze away from the page. “Thank you. So much.”
“It’s not too cheesy?” You asked quietly, sweeping a thumb across his cheek to catch the tears that escaped.
“No.” He laughed. “This is the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me.”
“Well, you’re the most thoughtful person I’ve ever known.” You said, pressing a kiss to his cheek this time. “Okay, that one was cheesy.”
“I’m proud of you, you know?” Spencer set the book down again, returning his hand to your hip as he pulled you impossibly closer. “And I was thinking about how it felt to have Henry curled up beside me as I read him your book. About how much more amazing it would feel to maybe do that with children of our own someday.” He trailed off sheepishly, fingers twitching against your waist.
“No way,’ you breathed, the force of the love you felt hitting you so hard in the chest you didn’t notice the way Spencer’s face screwed up in confusion before dropping in disappointment.
“No?” He swallowed, his gaze dropping to the floor. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to assume that-“
“No, Spencer.” You chuckled airily, taking his face in your hands. “I meant that I had the same thought. When we were on the phone and you were talking to Henry I couldn’t help but imagine watching you read our kids to sleep with stories I wrote just for them. I couldn’t stop thinking about it.”
“So does that mean…?” He asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Yeah I think it does.”
“You want to? With me?” A small, disbelieving smile bloomed on his face as he stared up at you as if you’d hung the stars.
“So, so much.” You whispered as he finally pressed his lips to yours. “In fact I already know what I’m going to write for them.”
Mal's Note: Y'all are gonna be mad at me for this one... but I'll remind you that some of you asked for more parts, and this was the only way I felt the story could move forward and still be interesting. However, I regret nothing.
Love,
Mal❤️
I LOVE MY BETA READERS MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF! @theghostofcosmichorrorpast @cringeiknow @snailsinamarchingband
Warnings: MDNI 18+ beyond this point! semipublic sex, p in v sex, oral sex fem!receiving, mentions of death, mentions of Haley Hotchner and her death, vaginal fingering, angst, fluff, oh I almost forgot reader bites Hotch, cliffhanger ending (kinda)
Additional Note: If you're tagged its because you asked me to tag you in the previous installation, if you wish to be untagged or for me not to tag you in the next chapter please message me and I will take care of it. <3
Pairing: Hotch x BAU!Reader (NO Y/N)
WC: 14.8k
AO3
Mal's Masterlist
Your eyes refused to open, your head felt so heavy and your brain seemed to be made of cotton. Not only were you unsure where you were, you didn’t know what day it was, or what year.
You did know, however, that there was a second body in this bed with you. Strong arms held you close, and warm breath stirred your hair.
You forced your eyelids to cooperate, and peeked down at the dark head of hair nestled into your neck. From this angle it looked like…
Hotch.
Everything came rushing back to you at once and what you remembered… was the best morning of your life.
He had absolutely rocked your world. You had known it would be good… but that was… Wow.
He was sleeping peacefully so you didn’t want to wake him, but you wanted to know what time it was. There was no sunlight coming through the windows, only the dim glow coming from the street lamps on the sidewalk. It was night. You’d slept all day.
Wait.
When had you fallen asleep?
The last thing you remembered was…
Oh God.
You felt heat rush to your cheeks and suddenly you were very glad that you had woken up first.
You had fallen asleep with his dick still inside you.
Which was mortifying. However, to be completely fair, the man had completely exhausted you and you’d already been over tired to begin with.
You wondered again what time it was.
Your phone should have been laying on the nightstand closest to you, so you carefully untangled your arm from Aaron’s and reached blindly for it. Patting around the table top until you found it.
Powering it on, you had to wait nearly five minutes for it to stop buzzing with six weeks worth of notifications.
It was nearly nine o’clock.
You didn’t know what time you’d fallen asleep, but you knew you’d been asleep for over ten hours.
You were starting to go through your messages and respond to emails and such, when the phone began to ring.
You panic-answered it, not wanting the noise to wake Aaron. You didn’t even check to see who it was.
That was a mistake.
“Hello?” You rasped into the phone.
“Omg, did we wake you?” You’d recognize Penelope’s voice anywhere.
“No, I was awake. Who’s we?” You murmured.
“Morn’n sleeping beauty.“ Emily drawled.
“How are you feeling?” JJ chimed in with concern, which you appreciated.
“Who me? I’m fantastic.” You replied quietly, smirking to yourself as you glanced down at the sleeping man whose head was still buried in the crook of your neck.
“Oh, I bet you are.” Emily said, teasingly and your brows drew together.
Your confusion only grew when the others giggled quietly in the background.
“Am I missing something here?” You queried.
Aaron groaned softly in his sleep and you coughed to cover it, running your fingers through his hair soothingly.
JJ cleared her throat.
“How’s Hotch?” She asked, a bit mischievously.
You almost panicked, but you knew there was almost no way they could have heard him, and an even slimmer chance that they recognized his voice from one sleepy groan.
“Last I saw him was this morning around five. He was headed home, so I haven’t the slightest. Why?” You tried not to sound guilty.
“Really? Cause we thought he must’ve just crashed at your place.” Emily pushed.
What the hell was going on?
“Nope. I offered, the poor guy was beat. You know him though, he politely—but firmly—declined and then went home.” You lied, whispering softly, and then to make yourself feel a little better, told one truth. “Wouldn’t even accept a cup of coffee for the ride home.”
“Yeah, that sounds like Hotch.” JJ agreed.
You relaxed slightly.
“We’re a little confused though.” Garcia piped up.
“Oh?”
“Mmm hmm.” She hummed. “Hotch hasn’t been answering his phone all day and the SUV never made it back to Quantico. So we just assumed…”
Shit. You hadn’t thought about that.
“Oh, well he was probably too tired to make that drive so he must have just gone straight home.” You murmured dismissively. “It’s not like him not to answer the phone though. He’s probably still sleeping, I wouldn’t bother him.”
“Is that why you’re whispering?” Emily’s tone was full of glee.
“No…” You hissed. “I told you, he’s not here, he left this morning. My cat is sleeping on my lap, if you must know why I’m whispering. And even if Hotch was here, why is that such a big deal? He was exhausted.”
You didn’t know where the hell you came up with the idea of a cat… you didn’t even have a cat. But it was the first thing that popped into your mind, and it was better than the alternative.
Aaron stirred again, his arms tightening around you. You pressed a soft kiss to the top of his head.
“Well, we tracked the SUV and his phone.” Penelope admitted. Fuck. Think fast, think fast, think fast. “They’re both at your apartment.”
The jacket!
“Just a second let me check something.” You murmured, then waited thirty seconds. “Oh my God, his phone was in the pocket of his suit jacket. I wore it home, remember? Cause I was… underdressed. Yeah I have it. I’ll bring it to him in the morning.”
“And the SUV?” JJ prompted.
“I have no idea, maybe he called a cab. Or slept downstairs inside it like the stubborn mule he is.” You joked, and suddenly there was a hand moving slowly down your bare stomach.
Was he awake?
The girls laughed, but you were no longer focused on them.
“Wait, you have a cat?” Penelope asked excitedly. “Since when?!”
“Uh, yeah…” You said distractedly, because that hand was now between your legs gripping the thigh closest to him and pulling it up over his legs. Effectively giving himself access to what he seemed to be after. “I got it a couple months ago.”
You gasped involuntarily as a finger found your clit. Circling it lightly.
“You okay?” Emily asked.
You cleared your throat.
“Yeah, I just remembered that I need to pay my neighbor, Marge, for taking care of the cat while I was gone.” You lied, through your teeth, which you were now clenching tightly to keep from making any obvious sounds.
The finger started to roam again, from your clit, down to your entrance. Teasing at it playfully.
“I want pictures!” Penelope demanded.
“Pictures?” You choked out as the finger slipped inside you.
“Of the kitty!” She exclaimed. “Jesus, are you alright? You sound… distracted.”
You should have seen that coming, honestly. Of course she wanted pictures of the nonexistent cat!
“Yeah, I’m fine.” You lied.
You were not fine.
Aaron’s finger was pumping in and out of you at an agonizingly slow pace, doing nothing but tormenting you with the barest tease of what you now knew he was capable of doing to you.
“I don’t have any pictures of the cat, I got him right before I went undercover, I never even decided on a name.” You bluffed.
“That poor baby!” She cooed, as if the “cat” could hear her. “Take a picture and send it to us! We’ll help you name him!”
Shit.
“I can’t right now Pen.” You said, biting back a whine as he curled that finger just so. “He’s all curled up in my lap and I can’t see his face. If I move him he’ll wake up and you know the rules.”
“Yeah, yeah, you don’t move until the cat does…” She grumbles.
“ExactLYY!!” You yelped involuntarily as Aaron slid a second finger into your pussy.
That made him finally look up at you with a smirk on his face, propping himself up on his elbow.
“What are you doing?!?” You mouthed, and he had the audacity to shush you silently.
“Are you alright?” JJ asked suspiciously.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” You hissed, then looked pointedly at Aaron and said, “The little fucker just dug his claws into me in his sleep and it caught me off guard.”
The smirk on his face and the mischief in his eyes only grew, as he continued pumping his fingers in and out of you. Leisurely, as though this was the most normal thing in the world and three of your coworkers–and best friends–weren’t on the phone.
“Uh huh…” JJ muttered, and she didn’t sound convinced. “Well we were actually wondering if you wanted to join us? We were having a little girl’s night, we tried to call you but your phone kept going to voicemail.”
“Oh, yeah, I just turned it back on… but ya know, I’m still really tired, so I think I’m just gonna stay in.” You feigned a yawn to sound convincing. Then made direct eye contact with Aaron. “It was a rough night and then a long morning. When I got home, the cat was really excited to see me. So I knew I would have to play with him before I could get any rest, and let me tell you, he has stamina for his age.”
Aaron scowled down at you playfully, and then he started to move. Pulling his fingers out of you so slowly you could hardly contain yourself. You bit your lip to keep from moaning.
“Oh is he old?” Penelope asked.
“He’s practically geriatric.” You quipped.
Aaron’s eyebrows shot up on his forehead, as though he were saying ‘oh really?’ and then, he simply disappeared beneath the covers.
Oh fuck.
“Awww I wanna see him…” Penelope whined.
You could feel Aaron’s breath on your pussy.
“They say cats get tamer and less playful with age… less gullible… not this one though. Dangle a toy in front of him and he’ll chase it everytime.” You said, and you knew that Aaron knew you were teasing him because he chose that moment to lick a stripe up your pussy.
You let out a strangled laugh.
“Well we hate to leave you out.” JJ tried again. “What if we came over there instead?”
Your eyes shot wide.
“Yeah we could bring dinner! And wine!” Emily supplied.
“Oh, no. Guys really, I’m exhausted, I wouldn’t be any fun, I just want to lay here in bed and cuddle the cat.” You protested.
The cat seemed to like that response, and hummed contentedly from between your thighs, before lapping at your clit.
“What was that?” Emily asked.
“Hmm?” You hummed in question.
“I heard something in the background.” She clarified.
“Uh, my stomach growled, maybe that was it?” You suggested. “You mentioning dinner reminded me that I’m hungry.”
“When was the last time you ate something, sweetie?” JJ asked, sounding concerned and motherly again.
“Um… I had some sausage for breakfast while I was playing with the cat.” You smirked to yourself.
Aaron snorted a laugh from under the covers.
“There it was again!” Emily exclaimed.
“I heard it too!” Penelope agreed.
“That was not your stomach either!” Emily continued. “So don’t give me that again!”
“The cat snored?” You tried weakly, swatting the back of Aaron’s head.
“Ow?” He protested softly.
“Shh.” You hushed him, covering the phone mic with your hand.
His response was to latch his lips onto your clit and suck.
Which pulled a very startled, very loud, very non explainable sound from your throat in the form of, “Fuck!”
“Woah.” JJ said.
“That was a moan.” Emily stated, with no room for dispute.
“That was definitely a moan.” Penelope agreed, excited amusement dripping from her voice.
“It was not a moan!” You protested. “It was-“
“I swear to God, if you give me some bullshit about a cat again I am coming over there and catching you in the lie! There is no cat!” Emily was adamant.
“I- I- it’s- umm-” You stuttered and fumbled for words, but your brain was not currently online.
Because Aaron had reinserted those two—thick—fingers and was pumping them in and out while sucking on your clit.
“Oh my God.” Emily muttered, then shouted. “Is Hotch still there?!?!”
“No!” You blurted without thinking it through.
“So he was there at some point.” JJ called it out immediately.
“What? I- no- he-“ you stuttered again. “Hotch was never here!”
Hotch was most definitely there, and he was making his presence felt more and more every second. He had started to devour you, eating your pussy like a gourmet meal. You could not focus and you were about to cum on his face, for the second time that day.
“Oh she is lying!” Penelope said excitedly.
“I- I am not…lying!” You struggled to make the words come out of your mouth. “I don’t know where he is, the last time I saw him was this morning, and there is nothing going on between me and HOTCH!”
Aaron chose the exact moment you said his name to curl his fingers up against your g-spot and flick your clit with his tongue. So it came out in the most pornographic moan you thought you’d ever heard.
Especially from yourself.
Aaron hummed around your clit, sounding very pleased with himself. Unfortunately for you, that was all it took to throw you over the edge you’d been riding. You dropped the phone, and it went tumbling off the bed with a thud as you grabbed onto the blanket, clutching it for all you were worth. Biting your lip through what would’ve been a scream, but came out a strangled yelp.
You could hear Emily calling your name from the floor, and the chaos of Penelope and JJ in the background. But you were more than a little busy riding out the intense orgasm that was pounding through you.
Aaron licked you through it, lapping at your pussy until it stopped pulsing and your thighs stopped shaking. Then he crawled up and rested his head on your stomach, pulling back the covers so you could see his face. Smirking up at you so smugly you could only lay there and think of ways to make his life hell for this.
“Are you okay!?!” You could just barely hear Emily from the phone speaker as it was now laying on the floor in the middle of the room. There was nothing you could do about that currently, you were fairly certain your legs weren’t going to work for the next several minutes, and you had no words. You didn’t even know what words were, actually, he had simply tongue fucked you stupid.
Aaron kissed your stomach and then got up and retrieved your phone, putting it on speaker so you could hear Emily and the others. Then he grinned at you.
“Sorry Prentiss, she can’t seem to talk right now…” He said. “The cat must have her tongue.”
“I FUCKING KNEW-” and then he hung up the call, interrupting her mid sentence.
You stared up at him in panicked shock.
“Oh my God, are you cra-” you started and he just laughed shaking his head, so you trailed off, dumbfounded at his lack of concern.
“So I’m a stubborn mule, huh?” He asked with a teasing grin.
You scowled at him.
“As if you didn’t already know that about yourself…” You grumbled. “And in my defense, I didn’t know how you would feel about them… knowing… about whatever this is. Apparently, it's not an issue…”
He huffed a laugh.
“They already knew, Sweetheart.” He knelt down on the edge of the bed and crawled toward you.
“How?” You asked. “We weren’t that obvious last night… were we? I mean you could’ve been a little less handsy—not that it bothered me, cause it didn’t—but other than that…”
He hovered over you for a minute.
“I slipped up on the phone with Morgan. He backed me into a corner this morning, just like they did with you. They have known all day.” He murmured, then dropped a kiss to your lips. “So there’s no point in hiding it from them any further.”
You hummed against his lips contentedly. Kissing him twice.
“The exhibitionism may have been a little much though, don’t you think?” You asked, then looked up at him seriously. “I’m never going to be able to look them in the eyes… ever again. And if they tell Morgan what they heard… The jokes will be unending.”
He smirked, then kissed your jaw, your neck, your chest… and then came back up to your lips for one more kiss, before he rolled to the side and laid on his back next to you.
“The jokes were coming regardless, baby. Morgan may not have heard that, but he definitely knows something happened.” He sighed. “There’s nothing I can do about it now. I can tell you, that even though he’ll tease, he won’t tattle. Which, in our situation, is more than we could ask for.”
“The others–”
“Will be discreet… well… I don’t know if they’re capable of being discreet… But they won’t tell anyone.” He joked.
You laughed quietly and then you just laid next to him in comfortable silence for a few minutes.
Until you had a thought.
“Oh my God…” You muttered. “Do you think they told Rossi?”
He snorted.
“Oh definitely, Dave is the biggest gossip on the team.” He laughed quietly as you groaned, then kissed your cheek. “He should be the last of your worries though… He won’t say a word to anyone.”
You rolled over so that you were nose to nose with him, resting your hands on his bare chest.
“You just said he was the biggest gossip on the team, and now you want me to believe he won’t say anything?” You asked incredulously. “How could you possibly know that?”
He brushed his nose against yours three times—making your stomach do backflips—and then kissed you with a smile.
“Because, first of all, Dave is my closest friend. He wouldn’t say anything that would get me into trouble, unless he thought there was the slightest possibility that I was hurting you; physically or emotionally.” He explained, kissing you again. “Which I wouldn’t ever do intentionally.”
“Mmm this is starting to sound like that talk that you really wanted to have earlier.” You hummed, burrowing in closer.
“Which we really should still have…” He murmured, his arm wrapping around your waist, hand sliding slowly down your back. “Maybe over dinner?”
You giggled as he nuzzled into your neck, leaving soft kisses everywhere.
“Are you asking me on a date, Aaron?” You teased, making him pull back and look you in the eyes.
“Conventionally, I would have done this before I took you to bed, but yes, I am.” He admitted softly.
“Well something tells me, nothing about this is going to be conventional. Which I happen to love, so yes, I will go on a date with you.” You smiled at him, watching as his eyes lit up.
He closed the small distance between you and kissed you thoroughly. Your lips parted with ease and his tongue tangled with yours. That hand finding your ass and giving it a firm squeeze, making you moan into his mouth.
Then you realized something.
“Aaron?” You questioned, pulling back just enough to speak.
“Yeah baby?” He asked, nipping at your lips gently.
“You said, “first of all.” That implies there’s more than one reason.” You brought the conversation back to Rossi’s gossiping habits.
He chuckled softly and kissed the tip of your nose.
“The other reason is because it benefits him if no one comes snooping about our relationship.” He said cryptically.
“How does that possibly affect him one way or another? We both know that the worst that would happen is they transfer me to another unit, or section. Which would suck for me, but the rest of you would be fine…” You muttered in confusion, scrunching your face up at him.
His eyes were twinkling with mischief again as he leaned in closer.
“I happen to know that he’s sleeping with Strauss, and if anyone came snooping into the interpersonal relationships of the BAU…” He whispered conspiratorially, as though it were the juiciest gossip he’d ever heard and you began to wonder if maybe Dave wasn’t truly the biggest gossip after all.
It was pretty juicy though.
“Wow, so both our Unit and Section Chiefs are sleeping with subordinates. How scandalous, Agent Hotchner.” You teased, leaning back in and putting your forehead against his.
“It happens more than you might think, the Bureau just keeps a lid on it.” He admits. “I can think of a few more inappropriate workplace relationships off the top of my head…”
“Hmmm… well, while you do that…” You murmured, making your voice drip with seduction, running your hands down his chest and stomach until you found the waistband of his boxers—which you were slightly irritated had found their way back onto his body—and slipped one inside. He was already hard as you wrapped your fingers around him. “I think I’ll give you some head, seeing as I’ve received four mind blowing, earth shattering, life altering orgasms from you… and you have still only gotten one in return.”
You saw his pupils dilate, felt his cock twitch and grow impossibly harder, and his breath stuttered as you started kissing your way down his chest.
But then your stomach growled—loudly—and you remembered that you actually were hungry. You weighed your options in your head… Get out of bed and eat, or stay in bed and fuck the delicious hunk of a man infront of you for the second time in twenty four hours…
There was a very clear winner in your mind.
However, Aaron also heard your stomach call out for sustenance, and he was nothing if not practical.
“As much as I would love to feel those pretty little lips wrapped around me again…” He murmured, his voice suddenly two octaves lower and oh so raspy. “You did lie to JJ about having breakfast this morning. Which means you haven’t eaten since before you went into the club last night. That's been over twenty four hours now, Sweetheart. You need to eat.”
You groaned and let him pull you back up so that your faces were even, and gave him a pitiful little pout.
“Technically, I didn’t lie. I said that I had sausage this morning, I did not say that I ate it, or what kind it was. Simply that I had some, and I did. Soo…” You joked, earning an amused chuckle as he shook his head.
“What am I gonna do with you?” He murmured, almost to himself, though you knew he meant for you to hear it.
“Fuck me again, preferably, but I also would not mind being fed…” You mused, getting a sexy little smirk for your efforts.
He kissed you slowly, as though he had all the time in the world and intended to use every second of it to memorize the taste of you.
When he finally pulled away, you whined pathetically, and he laughed, kissing the tip of your nose.
“Go hop in the shower, honey. I’ll order something and have it delivered so you can eat.” He instructed.
You looked at him skeptically for a moment.
“Will you still be here when I get out? Or are you Irish goodbying me?” You interrogated him.
“I’m yours all night baby…” He murmured, kissing you once more. “Promise.”
You wished he were yours forever…
The next morning Aaron woke up early, his limbs still tangled with yours, your soft breaths moving his chest hairs as you lay sprawled across his upper body, your head laying just above his heart, and your hands resting on his shoulders.
There was sunlight, just barely starting to trickle through the blinds. If the sun was coming up, it was around six in the morning. His body’s internal clock was a well oiled machine. Up at six, no matter the previous night’s activities.
And last night there were plenty.
You were sleeping so peacefully… and he truly didn’t want to wake you.
But he also didn’t want you to wake up alone, wondering where he went, what time he snuck out, and why he didn’t say goodbye.
And he did have to go, if it was six, then he only had three hours to drive the twenty five minutes from your place to his. Take a five minute shower, iron a shirt and press his slacks, tie a tie, have breakfast with Jack—who he hadn’t seen since the day before the raid (Jessica was a saint)—then drive the thirty minutes to Quantico. Which only added up to an hour and fifty minutes, but if he factored in the morning rush traffic and construction on the beltway… he’d be cutting it close.
His arms were wrapped around your waist and he tightened them, wanting you even closer for just a moment. Just to savor the weight and heat of your body on his.
He really hoped he got the chance to get used to it.
“Sweetheart.” He murmured in your ear, stroking the side of your face with the backs of his fingers.
You moaned softly in your sleep and nuzzled in closer. He smiled and ran his fingers through your hair, massaging your scalp.
“Baby, wake up for me please…” He said just a little louder, kissing your forehead and stroking your back.
“Mmm mm…” You mumbled sleepily. “It’s not time yet.”
“I know, baby… You can go right back to sleep, but I don’t want you to wake up alone later and be sad that I didn’t say goodbye.” He tilted your face up just enough to give himself access to your lips, which he kissed. Once, twice, three times…
And there… a smile was forming on your beautiful face now.
“There you are…” He whispered. “Come on pretty girl, open your eyes…”
Your lashes started to flutter and he was breathless—speechless—as you looked up at him with those gorgeous eyes. You looked slightly dazed and a little confused, but as your eyes grew more alert, they flooded with pure adoration that made his heart pound in his chest.
“Good morning…” You yawned, your voice raspy and sleepy
“Morning…” He hummed, kissing the tip of your nose, then your lips.
“What time is it?” You asked, nuzzling in closer to him.
He held you tighter and kissed your forehead again.
“Around six.” He told you.
“Work doesn’t start until nine. Why are we awake?” You pouted sleepily.
“Because I have to go baby, and I wanted you to know that I was leaving instead of sneaking out.” He explained softly.
“Oh…” You murmured. “Where are you going?”
“Home, I need clean clothes for work, and I want to have breakfast with Jack. I haven’t seen him in three days.” He explained softly, running his fingers through your hair. Taking every opportunity to touch you while he could.
Your eyes shot wide and you sat up straight.
“Oh my God, Aaron! You haven’t seen Jack in three days?!” You exclaimed. “What are you still doing here? I mean, I like having you here but Jack is more important, you should’ve gone home last night! He is probably worried or at least missing you!”
Your concern for Jack’s emotional state was so endearing, he could help himself and pulled you back down with him. Peppering kisses all over your cheeks.
“You’re so sweet, pretty girl.” He murmured. “It was already Jack’s bedtime when we woke up last night, and I wouldn’t have made it home before he fell asleep. There was no sense in it, when I knew I would make it home before he woke up this morning. So I stayed.”
You relaxed slightly and he smiled.
“I’ll be dressed and ready for work before he opens his eyes. I promise.” Aaron assured you, stroking your cheek. “And yes I’m sure he misses me but he’s used to me being gone for longer stretches of time than this. He’s okay I promise, he’ll just be excited to see me when he wakes up.”
“Okay…” You murmured, “I feel less guilty for keeping you from him now.”
He chuckled softly and kissed you thoroughly.
“I’ll see you in a few hours, Sweetheart.”
It took him five more minutes to get out your door, and the whole drive home all he could think about was you.
He made it home by six forty and tried to be as quiet as possible coming in. He’d already pulled his phone out to send Jess a text, letting her know it was just him and not to be scared.
“Where have you been?”
He looked up and found Jess sitting on the couch with a steaming cup of coffee in her hand. She nodded her head toward the kitchen where a second mug waited next to the coffee pot.
“I stayed at a co-worker’s place, we’d been up for forty eight hours and once I dropped them off, I was too tired to make it back to the bureau and then home.” He explained on his way through the living room, walking over to grab the second mug and pour his own cup. “I’m sorry I should have called and let you know, I was just exhausted and it slipped my mind.”
“Oh?” Jess called softly, so he could hear her, but she wouldn’t wake Jack. “Who? Was it Dave, or Spencer? Maybe Derek?”
He wasn’t sure why that detail mattered, but he was happy to make small talk with her if it made her happy. She did so much for him and Jack, that Aaron sometimes felt like he owed her a debt he could never fully repay.
“Uh, yeah I stayed with Dave.” He said, choosing the one he felt was most likely to cover for him if asked later.
Silence.
He glanced over his shoulder at her as he picked up the now full mug.
She was squinting at him and in that moment she looked so much like Haley that his heart clenched with pain for a brief moment, and had to take a deep breath to shake it off.
“Wanna try that again?” She murmured, then took a sip of her coffee, watching him over the rim.
“Who are you, my mother?” He joked, going to sit in the chair adjacent to the couch and shooting her a teasing grin on his way by.
“No, just the closest thing you have to a big sister, and you’re my little brother… I’m allowed to worry. Especially with your job…” She shrugged, as if that wasn’t a guilt trip. He knew she was just fishing for answers though and wasn’t actually trying to upset him. “Also, Dave called me yesterday morning, looking for you. Then called me back to let me know that they found you and you were more than alright.”
God, fucking damn it, Dave.
“I was alright.” He shrugged simply, taking a sip of his coffee. Knowing good and well he was caught in a lie, but not really caring to come clean yet. Jess wouldn’t know exactly what he was lying about.
He wasn’t sure he was ready to talk about it, not with Jess. He didn’t want to taint this—whatever this was—with all the emotions that would come with that conversation.
Not yet.
“So…” She drawled innocently, too innocently. “Who's the girl?”
Aaron choked on his coffee.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He gasped through the coughing fit that overtook him.
But he could feel his cheeks burning.
“That is the exact look you had on your face that time I caught you sneaking out of Haley's bedroom window twenty years ago.” Jess accused, a look of pure glee on her face. “Aaron Hotchner, you have a girlfriend and you didn’t tell me?! Spill!”
He was busted… there was no getting out of it now. Not with Jess. When she put her mind to something, she got her way… come hell or high water.
“ I- it’s- I don’t-” He stuttered, trying to come up with an acceptable answer, and sighing when the best he could do was, “It’s complicated, and very, very new. But I really like her, and I did ask her out–”
“ I would hope so,” Jess interrupted with a shit eating grin, “you spent the last twenty four hours at her place!”
Aaron thought he might just melt into the floor and die. Jess was the last person he wanted to be having this conversation with right now. He just knew his face was blazing red, he was sure because it definitely felt like it was on fire.
“Jess! I’m not doing this with you right now, I have to get ready for work before Jack wakes up so I can eat breakfast with him before I go.” He started to get up and walk to his room, intent on following through with his plan—and promise to you—to be ready for work before Jack woke so he could give the boy his full attention.
Jess just laughed.
“Fine… Keep your secrets! But Aaron…” She called after him, and the softer tone had him pausing in the hall.
“Yes?” He looked back at her.
“I’m happy for you… It’s about time.” She murmured, and the smile on her face was open and genuine… She meant it.
Aaron was sure that if he opened his mouth to respond, he would tear up instead.
He was happy too, in a way that he hadn’t been… in a very long time.
So he smiled back at her and then continued on to take his shower.
Jack had been over the moon to see him.
He’d had a million questions and a thousand stories to tell Aaron when he’d come into the kitchen and found him sitting at the table with his Aunt Jess.
Aaron answered every question and listened intently to every tale the boy told, and when it was time for him to head to work he’d gotten the biggest hug with a whispered, “I love you Daddy!”
He couldn’t imagine a better start to the day than the one he’d had this morning.
Traffic was light on the way to work, he didn’t get stopped at a single light and the closer he got to Quantico the more suspicious he got. He was never this lucky.
Usually, mornings felt like the universe was conspiring against him.
So he was bracing himself for the other shoe to drop as he walked into the bullpen and started the coffee machine as he did every morning. Then he walked to his office, flipping on lights as he went.
He was the first one in, as per usual, and so he sat down to catch up on his emails from the last two days. Then his phone dinged twice.
The first message made him grin ear to ear.
Pretty Girl: Omg I fell asleep after you left and just woke up about 15 minutes ago, I’m gonna haul ass to the office as quickly as I can.
He shook his head with a soft chuckle and sent back a response.
Drive safely please, no one else is here yet either and Morgan is late at least twice a week. You’re fine. - A.H.
He looked at the message and thought it looked too formal, too stiff, and considering the fact that he knew what it felt like to be buried inside you… that seemed a little cold. So he sent a second message.
I think I left my suit jacket at your apartment this morning, I was a little preoccupied. I'll have to come back by and get it soon. -Aaron
He didn’t even have time to check the other message before you responded.
Pretty Girl: I’ll grab it on my way out, but uh… You don’t need a reason to stop by, I’ll always be happy to see you. ;) Also, why do you sign your messages to us? You know your contact information is saved in our phones, right? I have always wanted to ask you that and now that you’ve literally seen my pussy… I think I have enough good will to get a pass.
He snorted to himself.
Maybe because I’m geriatric and just don’t know how to use technology… And I’ve done a lot more to your pussy than just look at it, or do you need your memory refreshed? I would be very glad to help in that endeavor. –The man who made you come four times yesterday
Pretty Girl: Do you want me to be late? Because if you keep talking to me like that I’m going to have to pull over on the way there and take care of the throbbing sensation I’ve now got between my thighs.
Don’t text and drive… Come to my office when you get here and I’ll take care of it for you.
He didn’t get a response, so he assumed you were doing as he asked, and refraining from texting while driving. So he checked the other message he’d gotten just after yours.
Strauss: I need to see you in my office at 9:15
Aaron checked his watch. Nine o’ five. He had ten minutes to chug a cup of coffee, maybe prep with some ibuprofen (in anticipation of the headache he got anytime he had to deal with her), and then walk up to her office.
There was a knock on the doorframe.
“Mornin’ lover boy…”
Aaron groaned inwardly, then looked up at Morgan standing in the doorway.
“Where’s Foxy Loxy?” Morgan teased.
“She sent me a text telling me she’d overslept and was going to be late.” He tried to brush it off, walking toward the door to go start the coffee pot.
“We figured you two would’ve just ridden in together this morning, ya know, since you were still at her house at Nine o’clock last night.” Morgan teased, following him down the stairs and through the bullpen.
“I went home to see my son.” Aaron muttered, not specifying when he’d gone home.
“Jack’s bedtime is at like eight thirty…” Morgan quipped.
He couldn’t help the small smile that he had to bite back at the fact that Morgan knew Jack’s bedtime. He was a great friend.
No matter how annoying he was being at the moment.
“I didn’t say I saw him last night…” Aaron smirked, throwing Derek a bone, just to get him off his back.
He let out a bark of laughter and clapped Aaron on the shoulder.
“My man!” He crowed.
Aaron just rolled his eyes, shaking his head.
“I have a meeting with Straus in…” Aaron checked his watch. “Eight minutes. I would appreciate it if you’d get the team going on the morning briefing if I’m not back by ten.”
Morgan’s teasing expression dropped immediately as Aaron started pouring himself a mug of coffee, then silently offered to pour one for the other man as well.
“I’m good… What does Strauss want? Early meetings with her are never good… she’s cranky in the morning.” Morgan warned, as if Aaron didn’t already know.
“She didn’t say.” He answered. “Just told me to be in her office at nine fifteen.”
“I don’t like that, Hotch… I don’t like that at all.” Derek muttered.
Aaron just sighed and shook his head.
“I’m sure everything is fine… We haven’t had any major discrepancies recently, we executed that raid with precision and we knew going in there would be casualties, but we didn’t lose any agents or officers, we even got our UC out clean.” Hotch shrugged. “Unless one of you has something to confess… then she probably just wants an update on this investigation, since we’re partnered with the Organized Crime division, we made a huge bust but it’s not over.”
“What if she knows about you and Miss Vixen doing things together that are not so clean…” Morgan teased, but there was a hint of concern in his eyes.
“I don’t see how she could, unless they called her about the SUV, but even then that’s easily explainable.” Hotch assured him. “Everything is fine Morgan, if there is something to worry about, I will let you know.”
“Okay…” Derek muttered. “But I still don’t like it.”
With that, Aaron sat his mug in the sink, patted Derek on the shoulder and made his way up to the lair of the dragon.
“We need to talk.”
Those were the first words Erin Strauss said to him when he entered her office.
They did not inspire much confidence.
“Well, I didn’t assume you ordered me up here for coffee.” He smarted off… then kicked himself…Why couldn’t he just sit down and be quiet? Now she was gonna be pissy.
“Aaron, this is serious.” She said, “The Organized Crime Section Chief called me this morning.”
Hotch stiffened.
“Your UC was compromised.”
Everything was not fine.
You were forty five minutes late.
You’d made it down stairs and then you’d realized that you couldn’t text him and drive at the same time if you’d wanted to.
Your car was still at Quantico.
You’d have to call a cab. Or an uber… but either way… you were gonna be much later than you’d originally expected.
You picked up your phone again to call Aaron and let him know… and then you had another horrible realization.
You’d forgotten to put your phone on the charger the night before.
You’d been a little preoccupied, as Aaron had put it.
Your phone only had ten percent, and you figured it’d be better to use it to hail a cab, than to call Aaron, because what could he do?
Besides, call a cab for you from his phone.
You didn’t want to bother him with it, so you called the cab and then turned your phone off to spare your battery until you made it to work, running back upstairs quickly to grab a charger.
The cab took another fifteen minutes to get there.
By that point you knew you’d be lucky if you made it in time for the briefing.
The cabbie must’ve been like eighty five years old.
That’s how he drove anyway… five under the speed limit, the whole way and he got stuck at every single light.
You’d been ready to scream.
When you’d finally arrived at the office, the entire unit was in an uproar. People were scattering like roaches in every direction. Morgan was standing on top of his desk—shouting orders—JJ and Emily were both at their desk phones, nearly screaming to be heard over the commotion. Penelope was in the conference room, a laptop in front of her on the table. She was in a state of panic and Reid was doing his best to console her.
You looked around for Aaron. There. In his office with Rossi, he was on his cell phone, it looked like he was calling someone, and then every time they didn’t answer, the furrow in his brow would deepen. His usual suit jacket had been discarded somewhere, his tie was missing, he had two buttons undone on his shirt and his sleeves were rolled up halfway to his elbows.
Something was seriously wrong.
You picked your way through the crowd, trying to get to someone so they could tell you what was going on. You reached Morgan first, and tugged on the leg of his pants, just to get his attention.
“What is happening?!?!” You shouted up at him.
When he looked down and saw you, his eyes widened with… relief? Then he grabbed you by the arm and hauled you up onto the desk with him.
“Morgan!” You protested, but he wasn’t listening to you.
“Everybody quiet! QUIET!” He shouted, and the bull pen fell still. JJ and Emily gasped and then Morgan shouted one last thing as he turned you to face Aaron’s office, “HOTCH!”
Aaron turned and looked out his window. When he made eye contact with you, he dropped his phone and came running out of his office, Rossi hot on his trail.
“What is happening?” You asked again as the crowd parted for him like the red sea.
Nobody answered you. Not as Aaron reached the desk, grasped both your hips and unceremoniously transferred your feet to the floor. Not as he took you by the elbow and pulled you, gently but firmly up to his office. Not as he slammed the door and closed the blinds.
They just stared until they could no longer see you, in wide eyed relief.
“Aaron, what in the world?! What is–”
He backed you up against the door and kissed you.
His hands were everywhere; your face, your shoulders, your arms, your waist, your hair… It was like he was checking to make sure you were still in one piece.
You didn’t know what had frightened him so badly–terrified him, it seemed–but you were happy to console him if you could. So you let him kiss you, until he was satisfied.
He finally pulled away, just enough so that he could speak–against your lips with his forehead pressed to yours–but he did not let go. His hands cupping both sides of your head.
“Where have you been?” He breathed.
“I- I told you I was going to be late…” You murmured, confusion wasn’t a strong enough word to describe what you were feeling.
“You weren’t answering your phone, your car was in the parking lot but you were nowhere to be found, none of your neighbors would pick up their phones…” He started listing things like they were explanation enough, but they weren’t.
“My phone was almost dead, I forgot to charge it last night. I turned it off to save the battery just in case I needed it. I also forgot my car was here so I had to catch a cab, and he was the slowest driver in history I swear and then– Aaron what’s wrong?” You pulled back farther to look at him.
He was shaking.
“Are you angry at me?” You whispered. “I’m sorry I was so late, I didn’t mean to be…”
He shook his head and just pulled you into his arms. Holding your head against his chest tightly and pressed a kiss into your hair.
“No baby, I’m not mad at you.” He murmured. “I thought I’d lost you…”
“Lost me??” You asked him incredulously. “Aaron what is going on!?”
He pulled you over to the couch and sat down beside you, unwilling to be separated by a desk.
“Sweatheart… you were compromised… Organized Crime called Strauss this morning to tell her they suspected your cover was blown.” He explained. “And then we couldn’t find you.”
No. That wasn’t possible…
“What?” You asked, your heart pounding in your chest as fear took hold. “No, I got out clean. There’s no way.”
“I’m sorry, honey, but you didn’t… We thought you did… but apparently one of the bouncers recognized–” He paused and clenched his fist in his lap. “He recognized me.”
“You? How–” You knew the answer before you finished asking the question. “The private room… He remembered you from the night we…”
“Yeah… He did.” Aaron nodded. “Apparently Organized Crime also has a UC in the ring… he sent in a warning at his last check in. They know about you. I’m so sorry, baby…”
You were shocked… you knew—of course—when you signed up for this, that something like this could happen… but you never imagined that it would.
“What do I do?” You finally had the wherewithal to ask.
“We, will keep you safe–”
There was a knock at the door.
Aaron nodded you over toward the desk and you moved to sit in one of the two chairs as Aaron sat in his desk chair.
“Come in.” He called out.
You shot Aaron a nervous glance, as Chief Strauss entered the office.
“I heard you found her.” She said immediately and then her eyes fell on you. “Ah good you’re already here. We’re glad to see you safe and sound. Let’s talk about next steps.”
Aaron cleared his throat.
“I was just getting to that.” He said, glancing back at you. “I think this team is more than capable of protecting her, we can work out a schedule and she’ll stay with one of us every week. She’ll never be alone and once we take the ring down, everything will go back to normal.”
Strauss frowned at him and shook her head.
“I know you can be brash, Aaron, but let's not be so shortsighted. How is your team supposed to focus on the rest of your case load if they’re so busy protecting her. Taking down this ring could take years, and our entire case rests on her testimony. Without it you have no probable cause and no reason for raiding that night club.” Strauss reasoned. “So of course she must be protected at all costs, but your team doesn’t have the time or the resources. Correct me if I’m wrong Agent, but you’re unattached, no spouse, no children, no close family?”
You blinked at her, in shock for a moment. She spoke as though your life was only as valuable as your testimony.
“Erin.” Hotch muttered, giving her a look that you didn’t quite understand. “She is invaluable to this unit, and I would be hard pressed to find a replacement.”
“I asked you a question.” Strauss said to you, ignoring him.
You snapped out of it.
“Yes ma’am, that’s correct.” You murmured softly, warily.
You didn’t like the way Aaron was looking at her, you didn’t like the way she was looking at you.
“What’s going on?” You asked.
“It would be in the best interest of the case—and your safety of course—if you went into the program.” She said bluntly.
You felt your brow furrow.
“What program?” You whispered… because speaking any louder seemed unwise at that moment…
“Witness Protection.” They said it at the exact same time. Strauss sounded determined, Aaron sounded defeated.
“What?” You felt your chest caving in, your breaths starting to accelerate, tears welling in your eyes and you could only look at Aaron. “Sir. I- I don’t need that kind of protection, I can stay. I don't want to uproot my life for this.”
You knew that only he heard the unspoken, I don’t want to leave you for this.
The look he gave you would’ve broken your heart if it wasn’t shattering already.
“Can you give us a week? If we can’t function as a unit and protect her at the same time, then we’ll send her into the program.” He bargained.
“Aaron…” She sighed. “I didn’t want to tell her this, but if you two are going to be stubborn… The other UC made contact again. He was calling for an extraction, he thought they suspected him too… His unit didn’t get there in time.”
The panic that bubbled up in your chest was sickening, your heart rate skyrocketed, your body began to shake uncontrollably, you broke out in a cold sweat and you couldn’t breathe.
“Shit.” You vaguely heard Aaron say, everything sounded like you were underwater. “Give me till the end of the day, she won’t leave the building, and I’ll have her ready to go by five.”
“I’ll let the Marshalls know.” Strauss murmured, then laid her hand on your shoulder. You looked up at her on instinct alone and her face softened slightly. “You did good work… The Marshalls know what they’re doing, you’ll be in good hands.”
Then she left the room.
Aaron had you in his arms as soon as the door clicked shut.
“You’re okay, I’ve got you.” He murmured.
One of his hands stroked your hair as he pressed your head to his chest, the other on your back. You could hear his heart beat–strong and steady–it was the only thing tethering you to solid ground. The only thing keeping you from spiraling.
You didn’t cry, you were too shocked to cry.
You just sat there–shaking–in stunned silence.
“Talk to me sweetheart…” He murmured after… you didn’t even know how long. “What’s going on in there?”
He tapped the side of your head with the tip of his finger.
“I don’t know…” You murmured, shaking your head as you pulled away, just enough to look up at him, making eye contact. “I- I know that it’s safer for the team… if I go… but I don’t wanna leave the BAU… I don’t wanna leave you.”
“You’re not leaving to protect us, baby, it’s you that’s in danger here.” He murmured, you nodded that you knew… and he took your chin between his thumb and forefinger, tipping your head up. “And you are not leaving. Not for good, it will be a leave of absence, just a sabbatical. I won’t replace you, the position will still be waiting for you when all this is over. I promise.”
You nodded, biting your lip, hesitant to ask what you really wanted to know.
“And so will I.” He whispered. “Whatever is between us… it’s worth waiting for.”
That was when the tears started to fall down your cheeks.
“I could be gone for years, Aaron, I can’t ask that of you…” You whimpered.
“I would wait decades to feel how I feel when I’m with you.” He confessed, wiping away tears with his thumbs as they rolled down your cheeks.
You didn’t care that you were in the office, you didn’t care that the door was unlocked, you didn’t care about anything in that moment… You just knew that you needed to kiss him…
At least one more time.
So you surged forward and melded your lips to his.
He met you half way, with a tender sort of passion that told you this wasn’t going to end with a kiss. When he buried his hands in your hair, you whimpered against his lips…
“I need you…” You sighed, barely breaking the kiss.
He hauled you up out of your chair, picking you up by the backs of your thighs, and you wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you across the room. He locked the door, pressing your back into it as he parted your lips with his tongue.
You let him in easily, your hands going to the nape of his neck and tangling in his hair.
He tasted of coffee and salt.
You realized then, that the salt…was from your tears… Still steadily rolling down your cheeks.
He didn’t seem to mind.
Leaning back slightly, and stroking them with his thumbs as he looked at you. Then, as if compelled to do it, he leaned forward and kissed the tears away, so tenderly you thought you might die from the sweetness.
He turned with you still in his arms—wrapped around him so tightly nothing could have pried you away—and laid you onto your back on the couch, lowering himself over the top of you.
He started to kiss his way down your throat and when he found the collar of your shirt he started to unbutton it slowly, continuing his trail of kisses with every button he freed.
You ran your fingers through his hair and down to his shoulders, clinging to him as if he might disappear if you let go… Because you knew, this could be the last time you ever felt him this close.
It wasn’t fair.
You’d only just found your way to each other. You should’ve had so much more time.
Two days would never be enough.
His mouth trailed down your stomach and he found the button of your pants with his fingers, undoing it with barely a thought. He knelt at your feet beside the couch and gently removed your shoes. Looking up at you with so many emotions swirling around in his eyes that you couldn’t pinpoint what they were.
Then he hooked his thumbs into your pants and slipped them down over your hips, pressing a kiss to the point of each hip bone as he did. The warmth of his mouth on your skin had you arching up off the couch.
When he pressed a soft, lingering kiss to the front of your panties, just below the little black bow on the waist band, you moaned.
He made his way back up your torso to your mouth, trailing kisses until he reached your lips. Kissing you deeply, so that any sounds you made would be caught by his mouth. Then his hand slipped beneath the lace of your panties, finding your clit and circling it with gentle precision.
You slid your hands down his back and tugged the tail of his shirt out of his slacks, reaching beneath the fabric, desperate to feel his skin beneath your finger tips instead.
He shuddered at your touch, leaning further into it and deepening the kiss, his teeth nipping at your lips gently.
You whimpered softly and pressed up into his hand with your hips, his fingers dipped down from your clit and found you already wet for him.
“Aaron, please.” You whispered against his lips. “I need you.”
You knew you didn’t have a lot of time. Not here.
He sat up, dragging your panties down your legs slowly.
The sound of his belt buckle jingling, the rasp of his zipper, and your mingled panting breaths filled the silence.
Your eyes never left his, and his never left yours.
As he lined himself up with your entrance, he lowered himself back over you. His lips met yours again as he slowly pushed into you, catching the low groan that escaped you.
You felt every inch of him as he stilled inside of you.
He kept kissing you through it, one hand on the sofa next to your head, the other cupping your cheek.
When he started to move, his strokes were long and slow, like he was memorizing the way it felt to be inside of you. To be kissing you. He pulled away from your lips, and his eyes roved your face, the hand on your cheek threading through your hair instead. Pushing it away from your eyes. Taking in every little detail of you and committing it to his memory.
Committing you to memory.
The realization that he also knew that this could be it—that you could be gone for years or end up dead—was too much for you to bear and you began to cry again.
Tears slipped down your cheeks no matter how hard you tried to blink them away.
“Baby?” He didn’t even have to voice the question, just stopped moving and looked at you with concerned eyes.
“You’re looking at me like you’re never gonna see me again and I… it just feels like this is it. This is all we get.” You explained, wiping at your own tears. Trying to get rid of them.
He grasped your wrist, gently moving it away from your face as your tears fell freely.
“This is not the last time.” He murmured, wiping them away with his thumb. “This will not be the last time I hold you, it will not be the last time I kiss your lips, or the last time I fuck you until you think you’ve seen God.”
You knew the last line was supposed to make you laugh… but you only sobbed harder at the memory. The last two days had been so perfect.
“Hey… sweetheart listen to me.” He whispered. “We will get that first date, we will get to experience the relentless teasing of Morgan and Prentiss, we will have so many firsts together that it’ll be like this never happened.”
You both knew that those were pretty words… but it was a promise he couldn’t make. You let him have that hope though, because you wanted to believe just as badly.
So you nodded and pulled him down by the back of his neck to kiss him. He started to move inside you again, his thrusts a little more urgent now, like he needed you so desperately he could hardly contain himself.
And you felt that urgency too… growing in the pit of your stomach.
“Don’t hold back.” You murmured against his lips on a gasp for air.
It was like he only needed to know you wanted him just as badly in that moment as he needed you, because as soon as the words left your mouth he let all restraint fly out the window.
Your head tipped back on a strangled moan as he fucked you deeper and harder than he had been before. He muffled the sound with his own mouth, kissing you with bruising passion.
“Shh, I know it feels good baby, but I need you to stay quiet, unless you want the whole bullpen to know what I’m doing to you.” He murmured against your lips when you quieted.
Just like that, your brain left the building, as it tended to do when this man touched you and spoke to you like that.
The force of his thrusts were moving your body… and the couch, which had started to make a scraping sound against the floor.
Aaron wasted no time, scooping you up off the couch, wrapping your legs around his waist and pinning you to the closest wall. Where he fucked you like his life depended on it, slipping one hand between your head and the wall so you wouldn’t bump against it, and holding you aloft with the other under your thigh.
He kissed you like you were water in the desert and he hadn’t had a drop in days. The strength of his lower body had you secured against the wall as he pounded into you.
His hand moved from your thigh and slipped down between your bodies. His fingers located your clit with practiced ease that had you biting your lip—wait, no, that was his lip—to keep quiet. He groaned softly at the sting of your teeth and tangled his fingers into your hair, tugging on it just hard enough for you to feel it.
His lips moved from yours as he kissed his way across your cheek and down your neck, nipping and sucking lightly at the skin there.
It made you tighten around him and he moaned quietly.
“I’m gonna think about this every night until I have you in my arms again, I won’t be able to help it.” He whispered, biting your earlobe gently. “When I close my eyes I’ll see the face you make when you come, I’ll hear the sounds I drag from you with my mouth, feel the way you clench around my cock… nothing—no one—could ever compare. Not to you.”
You felt that tell tale tension rising in your core… the way he spoke to you…
The way his fingers worked your clit in tandem with the thrusts of his hips—his cock hitting that perfect spot inside you… Every. Single. Time.
All that combined with his mouth on your neck—lips, tongue and teeth finding every sensitive patch of skin—was almost too much to bear.
“Aaron!” You whimpered as he drove you closer and closer to that edge, clutching at him desperately for anything to hold on to.
“I know, Sweetheart, I know… I can feel you. You’re so close aren’t you? Just need a little more, huh?” He murmured against your neck.
“Yes!” You whined, your nails sinking into his biceps, the only place you could find purchase. “Aaron, please!”
“Okay baby, you’re gonna have to be quiet. Can you do that for me?” His voice rolled over you like a caress, making the knot in your core tighten even further and you could only whimper in response. He kissed your jaw and your eyes fluttered closed. “It’s okay baby, bite my shoulder if you need to.”
The very thought of biting him…
So you did.
You reached up and pulled his collar to the side, and sank your teeth into the muscle where his neck met his shoulder.
“Fuck, sweetheart…” He groaned in your ear, it was the most obscene sound you’d ever heard, the rasp in his voice knocking the little breath you had from your lungs.
The ball of tension in your core exploded.
You bit down harder on Aaron’s shoulder just to keep from screaming and he held you close as your whole body tensed so tightly you weren’t even sure you were breathing.
“Baby I- I’m-” He started trying to pull out of you, but you held on tightly with your arms and legs.
“Don’t pull out!” You pleaded, through the euphoric bliss flooding your body.
“Fuck!” He gasped, and you felt the warmth of his cum filling you up as he thrusted through it.
Your body went limp, your vision fuzzy, your breathing staggered.
You let your head fall to his shoulder as you panted.
His chest was heaving as he leaned into you, using his body weight to hold you up and not much else.
“We’re making a habit of that…” He murmured after a moment. “As adults we really should know better.”
“A habit of what?” You mumbled, your brain too sex-adled to put it together on your own.
“Me coming inside you…” He responded quietly. “Don’t get me wrong, it’s amazing and I’ll never get enough of it, but a pregnancy is the last thing you need right now.”
You scoffed.
“That’s what pills are for.” You joked. “But can you imagine trying to explain that to the team… Christ… I can practically hear Morgan and Garcia calling us mommy and daddy now…”
He groans in exasperated amusement.
“I’ll give you the money for one, though you do know those aren’t one hundred percent effective, right?” He murmurs, leaning his head over and kissing your forehead.
“Mm hmm.” You hummed, nodding. “That wasn’t the pill I was referring to though. I’m on birth control, but I guess the added protection wouldn’t hurt. Since birth control isn’t always fool proof either.”
He just pressed another kiss to your forehead and then carried you back to the couch. Laying you down on your back as he slowly pulled out of you, making you both moan softly.
“Let’s get you cleaned up…” He murmured. “We need to tell the others what the plan is.”
Aaron had a million things on his mind as he helped you get cleaned up.
He had found some baby wipes in his filing cabinet—that he kept around because they were handy to have everywhere when you had a young child—and brought them back over to the couch.
“Lay back for me, sweetheart.” He murmured as he knelt by your hips.
“You don’t have to do that.” You whispered, biting your bottom lip and blushing probably the prettiest shade of pink he’d ever seen.
“I made the mess. I’ll clean it up.” He smirked at you, as your face went from pink to red. “Baby, there’s no need to be embarrassed. I enjoy taking care of you.”
“Okay…” You whispered.
And he was getting a weird read on your body language… he couldn’t quite put a finger on it.
“Unless that’s going to make you uncomfortable?” He asked, fishing for an explanation for your sudden loss of confidence.
“Not at all!” You shook your head almost violently as you tried to assure him that wasn’t the case.
Okay… that wasn’t it…
So he went about gently cleaning you up, knowing that you would tell him what was bothering you eventually. You couldn’t handle the silence—he’d noticed—you always felt the need to fill it, and that was fine with him. He loved to hear your voice.
It wasn’t until he was helping you slip back into your panties that you spoke up.
“Aaron?” You murmured softly, hesitantly.
“Hmm?” He hummed, biting back his smile.
“I uh- I don’t want you to think…” You bit your lip again and looked away.
“That’s gonna be a bit of a problem in our line of work sweetheart.” He teased softly.
“Aaron…” You groaned, but he could hear the amusement in your tone.
“What is it baby?” He asked, pressing a kiss to your knee before turning to grab your pants off the floor.
“I just… I need you to know that I don’t just… do that… with just anyone. I’m not usually irresponsible like that…” You explained—very vaguely, he might add—and yet he only felt more confused.
“Do what, sweetheart?” He asked for clarification as he gathered your pant legs up so they’d be easy for you to step into, then pulled your legs over the side of the couch so that your feet landed in the holes.
And you just let him, not making a single move on your own to help. Which he found both amusing and endearing, especially being an expert in body language. This screamed complete and total trust.
At least on the physical level, you knew he’d never hurt you.
“I don’t let guys… finish like that… inside me, I mean.” You seemed to struggle getting the words out. “I- I’m not like that, I know that’s incredibly risky for so many reasons. I- I’m not easy… It’s just… it’s different with you. I don’t think when it comes to you, I just…”
Aaron’s brain short circuited.
He didn’t hear the rest of your sentence, he was too busy processing the first few fragmented phrases. It seemed that you were in the process of trying to convince him that you were not promiscuous.
Which he already knew.
So this confused him. He was unsure of what he might have said or done to imply that you were. He was, however, very sure that he hated the very implication that he’d made you feel that way.
“Honey…” He murmured, reaching up to cup your face in his palm.
You just kept talking. Prattling on about how he was the first person you’d ever allowed to take such a liberty with you—which made his toes curl and gave him butterflies, (he would examine those phenomena later) —and how it wasn’t like you to sleep with someone before you’d even been on a date.
Ah… There it was.
Last night he’d said, conventionally he’d take you on a date before sleeping with you. Then just a minute ago he’d pointed out that he probably shouldn’t make a habit of finishing inside you because it wasn’t safe… and he’d told you that contraceptives weren’t completely effective.
Yeah, he could see where you might have taken that the wrong way.
He took your face in both hands and kissed you. Thoroughly.
It shocked you enough to quiet you.
“Honey, I never thought you were any of those things.” He assured you. “It’s not exactly a normal situation we’re in right now… the way I feel about you is… intense. It makes sense that we would get carried away and, clearly, that's something we both seem to… enjoy… and that’s all that matters, as long as we’re safe about it.”
You blinked at him for a second and there were a million different thoughts running across your face. Most of them seemed to be filthy.
“I really wish we had time to do whatever just went through your head.” He teased as he pulled you to your feet and then pulled your pants up over your thighs and hips. “Unfortunately…”
You grinned up at him.
“We should probably make an appearance soon, or people might wonder.” You finished his thought.
Then, together you made sure your clothes were straightened and hair was neat. Aaron put his jacket and tie—which you straighten for him—back on and then he watched you fix your make up. Thinking to himself how beautiful you were the entire time.
“Ready?” He asked when you turned back toward him.
You nodded your head and he held his hand out to you from where he now sat behind his desk. You came around the corner of it and took his outstretched hand and he pulled you down into his lap.
The little giggle that bubbled out of you made his heart clench, he didn’t know when he’d next hear that sound… and he’d started to get used to it.
“Aaron!” You hummed happily. “You said we had to go!”
“I know…” He murmured, looking up at you and tucking a stray lock of hair behind your ear. “I just want you all to myself… for at least one more minute.”
Sadness flooded your eyes and he immediately regretted bringing that up.
“Do I really have to go?” You whispered, holding back tears again.
Aaron took a deep, in through his nose—hold 1, 2, 3, 4…—out through his mouth. His face tipping up to the ceiling, his eyes closing. He knew he had to say that you did have to go…
It was the safest thing for you… even if it broke both your hearts.
“Yes.” He sighed. “Because staying puts you in twice the danger. Staying and working on this case puts you in direct contact with people who have orders to kill you. But in WITSEC, you’ll get a whole new identity, you can alter your appearance, and they will get you far away from here. You’ll be safe.”
And yet… he had that little nagging feeling in the back of his mind… a little voice that whispered: ‘Are you sure she’ll be safe? The last time you put the woman you loved in WITSEC… you never saw her alive again.’
He recognized that voice, it haunted him in every decision he made. The voice belonged to a dead man… he shoved that voice into a deep dark hole in the back of his mind.
WITSEC was safer than staying here, and last time the situation had been much different.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been safer than I am right now.” You murmured.
He smiled softly at you, at the implication that his arms were the safest place you could think of.
“I’m glad you think so…” he murmured, kissing the tip of your nose. “We should go, we have prepping to do before I send you with the Marshals.”
“Prepping?” You asked.
“You’ll see.” He answered.
A few minutes later, when you walked together into the conference room to find the others… they were making a plan.
“Hotch!” Morgan said upon seeing the two of you. “We’ve got a plan, we wanna run it by you, but we’ve got a schedule all worked out and we think we can manage the case load and this case, all while protecting Foxy. Here’s what we’ve got-“
Aaron held up a hand.
“Stop.” He said softly, glancing down at you to find tears in your eyes again. He hated seeing you cry. He laid a hand on the small of your back before he continued. “There’s already a plan, it’s already being put into motion. I appreciate this effort from you all, truly I do… but the circumstances are more complicated than we thought. We can’t handle this on our own and keeping her here with us only puts her in more danger, because we have to keep working the case.”
The room was silent for a second, confusion thick in the air.
“Okay…” Morgan said. “Then what’s the plan, fill us in so we can help.”
Aaron pressed his lips together in a tight line… he knew the reaction this was going to get. He knew that the others would hate this just as much as he did and if anything happened to you…
They’d blame him just as much as he’d blame himself.
A small sniffle drew everyone’s eyes over to you. You were crying again.
“She’s crying.” Penelope whispered. “Why is she crying?”
“I’m sorry, I’m trying not to.” You whimpered, and Aaron couldn’t take it.
He pulled you into his arms and hugged you tight, in front of the whole team.
He didn’t care to hide it from them, not when they already knew.
“You cry if you need to, sweetheart, it’s okay.” He murmured into your hair and held you tighter.
“Hotch?” Emily, questioned. “What is going on?”
Aaron swallowed hard, stroking your hair soothingly.
“Strauss is sending her into the program…” He murmured. “And for once… I agree with Strauss. This is what’s best for her.”
“The program!?” Spencer exclaimed. “W-what- like witness protection??”
Aaron nodded.
All hell broke loose.
He’d been expecting it… he’d known they wouldn’t take it well. Hell they were taking it worse than you were, just like he’d known they would. It was still hard to be patient with them…
He let them get it all out…
The surprise, the anger, the fear, the hurt and the sadness.
But when he told them about the other UC—the dead one—they changed their tune. If the ring was gonna go scorched earth on anyone they were suspicious of… the team couldn’t imagine what the ring would do to you, a woman they knew was a material witness against them.
Well they didn’t have to imagine, because they knew… so they just tried not to think about it.
One by one they’d all come to the realization that this was the only safe course of action.
Even if it wasn’t a sure fire guarantee.
“You wanted to know what you can do to help.” He reminded them when they all settled down of their own accord. Resigned to the reality of the situation. They all nodded sorrowfully. “Each of you has a skill that I need, to give her the best shot at surviving this until trial. Until it’s safe for us to protect her ourselves.”
He’d been holding you against his chest the entire time, and you finally looked up at him curiously.
“Morgan, I want you to put her on the sparring mat. Find every weakness she has and tell her what they are so she can fix them.” He said to Derek who nodded seriously. Then he looked at you. “You write down everything he says and when you get wherever you’re going you find a gym or an mma class and you practice everyday, do you understand me?”
You nodded at him with wide fearful eyes, and he hated scaring you but he would not let you be vulnerable… you weren’t Haley, you were already capable of defending yourself… but he’d made a mistake in sending her away when she was defenseless on her own.
He would allow you to go unprepared.
“Prentiss, you’re gonna teach her everything you can about spotting a tail and losing it. You’re gonna teach her how to disappear.” He instructed Emily.
“Of course…” She murmured, she was biting her nails… she only did that when she was stressed and scared.
“JJ you’re gonna get her back up identities. Not the one she’ll be using, because we don’t need to know that name… but others… just in case it goes belly up and they find her. So she can get out on her own and call us if she needs help.” He made eye contact with JJ, who was watching him with scrutinizing eyes… she was checking in on him.
“I’m on it Hotch.”
“Spencer and Penelope, I need you monitoring chatter. If you pick up anything that sounds remotely like they’ve found her you alert me and the Marshals immediately.”
They both nodded.
“What about me Aaron?” Dave asked, and Aaron took a deep breath.
“I need you to remain objective. Keep your focus on the case and not on her… because I can’t… I’m emotionally compromised, and I won’t let this happen again. So I need you to keep things above board, the whole case hinges on her testimony. Every bit of evidence we gather is a step closer to bringing her home. But we have to get it right.” He explained, hoping the urgency he felt was being conveyed. “If we don’t, and they walk, they might target her out of spite.”
He felt you flinch in his arms and he looked down at you.
“I won’t let that happen.” He murmured into your hair.
“When does she leave?” Penelope asked, tears slipping down her cheeks now too.
“End of day… today.” He answered. “So we have to work fast. It’s nearly eleven, we have until five. Let’s get started.”
The rest of the day seemed to go by in a blur and the whole time, Aaron couldn’t bring himself to leave your side.
He watched you spar with Morgan. Helped to spot out your weaknesses and even wrote them down for you.
He sat with you as Emily lectured you on spotting and losing a tail, he made you take notes and made you promise to study them.
No one stopped for lunch.
When Emily was done with you they sat you down because Spencer and Penelope had compiled a power point of every single known member of the ring. Pictures, aliases, identifying marks, and last known addresses. They put it on a flash drive for you to take with you when you left so you could go over it every chance you got.
After that, he took you down to the shooting range himself.
He worked with you on your concealed carrying techniques and your draw to fire speed with each carry style. As a federal agent you didn’t need a permit to carry. You just had to pass your weapons qualifications, and you did more than pass. You were nearly perfect.
Rossi finally made you all pause to eat an early dinner since you’d had no lunch. He’d run home, and he’d made your favorite Italian dish. He even gave you the recipe with specific instructions so you could have it while you were gone.
JJ had come back just in time for dinner. A manila envelope in hand…
It was thick.
She didn’t give it to you, not yet. You were laughing with Reid and Garcia over something and he could see by the look in her eyes that she did not want to interrupt that moment of peace.
He was sitting right next to you at the round table, but it didn’t feel close enough.
He tugged your chair a little closer and rested his hand on your thigh.
One by one the others fell silent, he could see them out of the corner of his eye, elbowing each other and grinning conspiratorially.
He didn’t care, he was too busy absorbing every detail of you…
“We still want answers about this, by the way…” Emily droned, gesturing between the two of you.
He didn’t bother looking at her, he watched you.
You blushed bright pink… God you were beautiful.
“Oh?” You feigned innocence.
He wasn’t going to hide from them though, this was his family… your family. He may not like their prying, but they did it because they cared.
“I would think you got more answers than you were looking for last night, Prentiss.” Aaron drawled in return.
Your face turned beet red at that, and Emily opened her mouth to give a retort, but Garcia beat her to the punch, grinning smugly from ear to ear.
“Really? Then uh, how’s that geriatric cat of hers feeling today? Still pretty energetic?” She asked teasingly, “Or did all the playtime from the last few days wear him out? He’s not as young as he used to be, ya know…”
“Woah, woah, woah, easy on the geriatric!” Dave protested. “You all are getting a little loose with that word around here.”
Everyone laughed and Aaron couldn’t help himself.
“I mean, in cat years he’s only a little over forty, that’s not considered geriatric is it?” He joked.
“Well I’m a little over forty and if I were to get knocked up right now they’d consider it a geriatric pregnancy so it think it’s only fair to label the boys that too.” Prentiss finally got her jab in.
“Now wait a minute, cut the old fella some slack…” JJ chimed, a sly smirk on her face. “She said he had stamina for his age.”
Derek finally opened his mouth to chime in but Spencer cleared his throat loudly and nodded toward the bullpen, everyone turned to look.
Strauss was headed toward the cat walk with two men and a woman Aaron didn’t know.
He checked his watch.
Four fifty five… they’d be the marshals then.
The room went completely still, the silence heavy and thick.
Then Emily was on your case again.
“WITSEC cannot save you from me, ma’am! You have to come home eventually and when you do…” she waved her fork at you menacingly. “We will be having a discussion about what we heard last night!”
Her attempt to ease the tension—the sadness—in the room did not go unnoticed.
Sad smiles were offered up around the room, and next to him, Aaron heard you sniffle.
He was so tired of seeing you cry, knowing there was nothing he could do to make it better.
So he didn’t look.
“I love you guys…” You murmured, your voice quiet and strangled. “And I’m gonna miss you all so much.”
Strauss rapped on the door frame as she stepped inside.
“I don’t want to interrupt but the Marshals are here, and they already have a placement ready for her. They would like to get on the road as soon as possible.” She announced.
It seemed like everyone forgot how to breathe for a moment.
“Thank you, Ma’am.” Was all Aaron could manage to say.
She took in the silence, the mood of the room, and–for once–did the right thing.
“I’ll give you all a moment to say your goodbyes.” She murmured and then turned to you and said, “We’ll wait for you at the elevator.”
“Thank you, Ma’am.” You whispered, your voice barely a breath, almost inaudible.
Strauss nodded and walked out.
“Did she just… do something mildly considerate?” JJ asked as soon as Strauss was out of ear shot.
Derek scoffed, Emily groaned and Dave winced.
“Is that what she was going for?” Spencer asked.
“You should have seen her this morning when she told us about WITSEC. She was almost motherly.” Aaron joked, just trying to do anything to make you smile
“Is that what she was going for?” You quipped with a smile, but it was a weak one at best.
No one really laughed.
Penelope was the first to move, rushing out of her chair and pulling you out of yours.
“Come here you!” She murmured as she squeezed you so tightly, that Aaron wasn’t sure you could breathe.
After that the others all took turns embracing you, squeezing you nearly lifeless. JJ gave you the manila envelope, and told you what was in it.
And then he was the only one left, and he knew the others had made it so on purpose, because they had all embraced you… So could he.
He took you into his arms and held you tightly to his chest.
“You are going to be just fine. You’ll be home before you know it and we can have that first date.” He murmured into your hair, sealing the promise with–what he hoped was–an almost imperceptible kiss to the top of your head.
Your arms around his waist tightened and for several moments neither of you moved.
He soaked up every second of it, memorizing the way your body felt against his own, the warmth of it, the smell of your hair, the rise and fall of your chest against his own.
“I’ll write to you, if they’ll let me…” You murmured into his chest, he squeezed you tighter.
“Only if you send it directly through the Marshals, not the mail.” He warned you.
“Of course.” You murmured, and then you were pulling away… and as desperately as he wanted to hold onto you for dear life…
He had to let you go.
“I’ll write to all of you.” You murmured to the team as a whole. “Every week.”
They all nodded, no one seemed inclined to speak.
“Let me walk you out?” He offered softly.
But you turned with tears in your eyes and shook your head no.
“If you walk out there with me I won’t be able to keep it together in front of Strauss, and I won’t be able to make myself get in that car.” You whispered. “I have to go alone.”
“I understand…” He choked out against his own tears. “Go–”
“Don’t.” You pleaded with him. “Don’t say that, if you don’t say it… it feels less final.”
He nodded, wiping away a tear that rolled down your cheek.
“I’ll see you soon.” He murmured instead.
You nodded at that.
“I’ll see you soon.” You repeated.
Then you turned and fled the room.
They watched you go together. He made eye contact with you one final time as the elevator doors slid closed in front of you, blocking you from sight, and carrying you away.
stir crazy - a bit of angst at first, fluff
summary: hotch is noticeably troubled, the bau seeks for answers
you and me - fluff, a little angst
summary: zane lowe interviews singer!reader who just released a new album
playing it cool - fluff, fluff, and fluff!!!
summary: aaron eavesdrops on a private conversation and it changes his life forever
↳ losing my cool - angst at first, but ultimately fluff
summary: part 2 to playing it cool; what if aaron doesn't get the answer that he wants?
first impressions - fluff, a healthy amount of pining
summary: the bau's been drowning in work since jj and emily left, hotch gives in and accepts applications
two idiots - fluff, literally two idiots in love
summary: hotch and shy!reader are stumbling through words until hotch gets bold
jealousy, jealousy - fluff, a little angst, jealousy
summary: your jealousy may bring out the worst in you..but the best in him
↳ l-o-v-e - fluff!! jealous!reader, jealous!hotch if you squint
summary: part 2 to jealousy, jealousy; seaver makes a move on hotch but he makes a move on you
cw: sickeningly sweet and soft aaron x reader, so much of aaron’s thoughts because we know that man thinks soo much more than he speaks!!
a/n: hiiii this is my third post so far and tbh i was so nervous to post the first two as that was my first time ever posting any of my writings anywhere!! but i’ve been getting so much more love on those than expected and i just really wanted to say thank you so much for all the likes and reblogs <33 i was honestly only expecting less than 10 notes as a newbie and reaching up to 200 is so so so wonderful. and especially for the love of hotch i– ugh!!!!! i already love u all
The team had worked a straight 5 weeks worth of cases prior, which had warranted Strauss to grant them all a mandatory 3-day rest. This simply meant that for 3 whole days there are no cases, no deadlines, and no new case files. They could come to the office at whatever time they’d like as long as they finished some reports at the end of the day.
Aaron being Hotch the boss man still aimed to arrive at the office at a reasonable time– 7:30am. To be fair, this is an hour and a half later than when he usually arrives at the office. And in his mind, the earlier he arrives, the more he can get done, and the more he gets done, the earlier he can come home.
This is the only reason why he is up at 6:00am on a supposed rest day. He did expect that he’d struggle a bit more to drag himself out of bed, knowing you’d be keeping him hostage with limbs that wrap around him in ways he can’t begin to understand, but to his surprise, you weren’t there.
Dragging his feet across the carpeted floor, his pajama pants hanging low on his hips and white shirt fitting him oh-so-snugly, he tries to find you. He’s rubbing the sleep of his eyes as he peeks his head into your shared bathroom. No sign of you.
He’s covering his mouth as he yawns when he quietly opens the door to Jack’s bedroom–still no sign of you. Remembering his son has been nursing a stomach bug since yesterday, he opened the door further to check on him. No fever. No chills. No sign of discomfort.
When he’s sure Jack’s okay, he turns around to go back to find where you went. He even checked the backyard as he passed by a window to see if you’re at your favorite swing reading, that perhaps you just woke up early and wanted to feel the morning sun because you claimed it lightens you.
He smiles a little to himself as he treads downstairs, finally hearing your soft murmurs as you spoke with someone presumably over the phone. As he neared the kitchen he realized that the person on the line was your colleague and friend Tilly, and that she was on speaker phone making it easy to listen in.
He slows down his steps as he nears the landing and pauses when he gets behind a wall near the kitchen. He doesn’t know what came over him. He doesn’t usually sneak around to eavesdrop, nor did he ever feel the need to especially when it came to you. You tell him everything, prompted and unprompted.
But perhaps it was the haze of the morning or the curiosity of what could possibly get you out of bed this early when you’re usually the one snoozing away as he’s getting ready for work– he stayed quiet behind that wall and made it his mission to understand the conversation.
He clears his mind and strains his ear, going as far as making his breaths slow and far apart.
He hears Tilly giggling, “Don’t get me wrong, Adam from Finance is really cute but.. isn’t he just a little too serious? He’s always got that frown going on.”
You sigh a little loudly, obvious that it’s a sigh to humor and not of exasperation, “Tilly, you know I love you, but every day you complain about being single. And every other day there’s a decent guy who you always always find that one flaw in that just crosses them off for you forever.” Tilly lets out a sound that’s a mixture of a laugh and a gasp.
“That is so not tr–” “Oh, Hugh’s just too clean. And Frederick’s too hard, it’s like- scary. Yes, veiny hands are hot but there’s veiny and too veiny, and Jason was just a double too veiny.”
Aaron momentarily pauses his listening and looks down at his hands, suddenly conscious where he fit in that category. Factoring in his age, his work, and the action he gets from the field– these all show. He tried thinking of a time you could’ve shown any dislike or disgust towards his hands but all he could think of was that one night when he cupped your face and you leaned towards it more, turning slightly to take his thumb into your mou–
He’s shaken out of his thoughts when he hears Tilly asking about you leaving, “What time are you getting to the office by the way? I just don’t want to get there without you. Adam might ask about that second date and I just need you as my bluff, my beautiful girl.” He makes a mental note to message Jessica before you both get ready for work.
“Riiiight. Remind me how many guys have I scared off for you now? And how many times have I helped you scare them off? Besides, I can’t go today and I’ve already told Bobby I’m on leave.”
In a slight surprise and panic Tilly whines, “What?! Why? You’re such a traitor. You know damn well I get so bored without you.” Aaron didn’t even know you were planning on staying home. You hadn’t mentioned anything about it last night which made him even more curious what made you decide.
He hears your soft laugh, “Don’t be so dramatic. You’ll manage a day without me. I mean you have to– my son caught a stomach bug yesterday so I just want to make sure he’ll recover completely.”
Aaron can hear Tilly responding, something about soup and warm baths, but his heart has just stopped so he’s not really processing any new words at the moment.
My son. My son. My son. My son caught a stomach bug.
He feels lightheaded. His heart kickstarts again, his pulse is ringing in his ear. He can feel his chest pounding to his heart’s beat. The words that rolled off your lips so effortlessly, so mindlessly, echoes in his head.
Jack may be young but he is smart. So so smart beyond his years. And he has grown to understand what had happened to his mom Haley, but not once has he– and even you allowed Jack to forget who Haley is and how much she loves him.
Images of you joining in their traditions of honoring and remembering Haley plays in his head in flashes. You helping Jack arrange a bouquet for Haley’s death anniversary. You helping Jack make a card for her birthday. You mixing the paint to get the right shades as Jack paints a portrait of Haley for his Mothers’ Day homework.
Aaron had told you everything there was to know about Haley and you’ve listened. He knows you adore her. You adore her for the same reasons he adored her. You understood the space Haley had in his life and in Jack’s life, and not once were you ever jealous, immature, or selfish about it. Even though he would’ve completely understood if you were.
You were nothing but supportive, and understanding, and loving. Even when he didn’t deserve it. Even when you deserved better. Admittedly, there was a point in time when he struggled with coming to terms with falling in love– with you nonetheless. You’re young, ambitious, brilliant, talented, insanely beautiful, and unfairly kind.
When the two of you had met, this was his profile: divorced with a kid, recovering from trauma that stemmed from being stabbed multiple times in his own home, emotionally unavailable, annoyingly serious and fatally dull– which really makes him wonder what made you fall in love with him in the first place, and even more so what made you stay even when he was bafflingly dense about how you felt about him.
He didn’t know how long he was standing there, like a deer caught in headlights. Replaying your words and his memories over and over again, slowly coming to the conclusion that you’re absolutely perfect and he’s absolutely gone for you.
Slowly coming to his senses, Aaron becomes more aware of the silence. The call must have ended while he was having realizations about things. He rounds the corner silently, getting a feel of where you’re facing. Luckily he guesses right, that you’re facing away from him.
You were rummaging through the fridge– the vegetable drawer if he had to guess, judging by how much you’re slouching and reaching, and the sound of the glass containers you use to prolong their freshness.
He quickly surveys the scene- your phone is on the counter, beside it is a chopping board with carrots and onions, a carton of chicken broth, Jack’s favorite dinosaur-shaped pasta, and chocolate milk– the one drink you both know can make Jack feel instantly better, happier.
His heart pinches again. You got up early to make sure Jack had something to eat for breakfast in time for his medicine. You got up early even though you aren’t planning on going to work. You aren’t going to work because you want to stay with Jack. You called Jack your son.
With so many things running in his head, he stands quietly observing you finding god knows whatever vegetable. Maybe it's the intensity of his stare or the volume of his thoughts, or maybe he started to breathe loudly– but suddenly you knew he was there. He could tell.
You slowly straightened your back from when you were leaning. Your hands have stopped rummaging through the drawer, and he could see the goosebumps on your legs and shoulders from the way the sunlight hits you through the kitchen window.
You turn around slowly, as if you were just caught doing something you aren’t supposed to be doing, “I’m so sorry, did I wake you?” grimacing as if it was a crime to be hot and cute and gut-wrenchingly-sweet.
“No.” His voice is groggy. Deep and rough given that he just woke up minutes ago and hasn’t really used it since. Looking at you through studying eyes, he clears his throat “Uhm, I woke up to get ready for work and you weren’t there.”
Aaron suddenly feels a little cold. The thin material of his shirt and pajamas doing little to contain what warmth he has left in his body. Or maybe it’s you, maybe his body has sensed that you’re near and is now craving your warmth, making him feel a magnified amount of its absence.
“Oh.. I’m sorry I just wanted to get ahead of cooking so Jack can have soup before he takes his medicine at 8 and since I was also planning to do some work though I’m on leave, it just made sense to get an early start…” You slow your words, noticing how Hotch is studying you tenfold in the moment, as if you were an apparition, “Are you okay? Did you want soup too? I can pack you some before you go?”
His silence makes you panic a little. You can’t really tell if he’s upset about something or if he’s sleepwalking, “Or you can eat here. I mean– you live here, of course you can eat here. I mean like instead of bringing it to the office– not that if you eat here, you can’t bring some anymore.”
The longer he stays silent, adoring you, the more you scramble to fill the silence, “I’m just– you know you can do whatever you want. You can eat here, there, anywhere. Unless you don’t want soup. I mean we still have leftover steak, I cou–”
You pause your rambling because you can see a smile starting to form on his face. A real, big smile. Laugh lines and dimples and all, which makes you smile. Realizing how stupid you were sounding and how funny the situation was becoming, you started giggling.
And just as you think he’s about to join the laughter to make fun of you, his smile softens and he says, “Marry me.”
part 2 here!!!!!
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