⚡I already told you what I was going to ask so...
for those who are yet unaware how dare you, i headcanon Tsurugi as transfem, and her name is Kyouka. she's my profile pic at the time i'm writing this. i figured i should take advantage of this ask to fully put my thoughts in order regarding how i feel about her, kind of as a reference for the future.
Kyouka is by biggest headcanon, and the one i'm the most insane about. to the point where i legally cannot use her canon pronouns. it just feels wrong. would you misgender your children? well, i won't either.
i like to think that her transition originates from God Eden, and how the toxic masculine environment there triggered sudden and heavy dysphoria. (btw i wrote a fic about it /shameless plug). but, because she's so focused on becoming stronger and saving Yuuichi, she pushes it away and pretends it doesn't exist. in God Eden, Kyouka not only ignores others because she doesn't have time for friendship, she also ignores herself because she doesn't have time for self-love. after all, her entire character revolves around self-sacrifice.
fittingly enough, Raimon are the ones challenging this mentality of hers. she introduces herself as Kyouka without elaborating, thinking that Raimon will probably believe that she was just given an unusual name for a boy. she just doesn't want to here her deadname. Raimon has no reason to question this deeper anyway.
except someone does. Tenma.
and, contrary to all the people at God Eden telling her she must act tough and strong, push away unecessary feelings, Tenma simply... accepts her. he doesn't question anything. as soon as he gets confirmation from Yuuichi that she's trans, he simply uses the right pronouns. and so does Raimon when Tenma tells them. no further questioning.
and Kyouka doesn't know how to react to that.
the only reason she even came out was because Yuuichi sensed something was wrong. she didn't really get why he insisted on calling her Kyouka, but she let him. Kyouka's guilt and self-esteem has been left in the dust for so long that she simply can't understand why people seem to care about gendering her correctly more than she, herself, does.
at God Eden, she unconsciously started flinching whenever she was included among the boys. and, even now, being misgendered still has that weird, sour taste that makes it harder to eat dinner.
maybe there's still some part of herself, deep down, that wishes she could love herself. and, thankfully, now, she has her brother, as well as Raimon by her side. they accept her as she is. they get angry on her behalf when someone at school misgenders her.
Kyouka, frankly, still can't understand how they can even forgive her for what she did when she arrived on the team. and a big part of her still instinctively wants to jump headfirst into the fire to protect her, because that's the only thing she can do to atone for her mistakes, that's her only value on the team.
at least that's what she believes, and, apparently, her teammates cannot disagree more. and, despite still not fully knowing how to value herself, when Tenma asks her if they can visit Yuuichi together, when Aoi offers her a seat at lunch, when Kirino initiates conversations about fashion... Kyouka slowly lets them in, and, the more she does, the more their trust in her seems to rub on herself.
art by @luvendrawingonthemoon (aka my dear asker who gave me this opportunity to yap about our daughter. yes we share custody)
anyway, estrogen can save Kyouka from low self-esteem.