Lydia Bennet is not a villain, but she gets a lot of hate for carelessly running off with Wickham and possibly ruining her sister’s lives. The narrator and characters, however, do not blame Lydia very much and I don’t think the author meant for us to hate her. She was failed by her parents, who did not teach her how to properly behave and did not ensure she was properly protected.
Obviously, the real villain is Wickham.
The most vicious takedown of Lydia is put in the mouth (letter) of a character we should not respect, Mr. Collins. We already know that his morality is skewed, as he seems to view the collection of tithes and sucking up to Lady Catherine as his primary duties, he writes this of Lydia, “I am inclined to think that her own disposition must be naturally bad, or she could not be guilty of such an enormity, at so early an age.” (Ch 48). However, even he mentions the real cause, “a faulty degree of indulgence”.
Elizabeth feels this cause strongly, and lays out a good argument for her father on why Lydia should not go to Brighton, “She represented to him all the improprieties of Lydia’s general behaviour, the little advantage she could derive from the friendship of such a woman as Mrs. Forster, and the probability of her being yet more imprudent with such a companion at Brighton, where the temptations must be greater than at home.” (Ch 41). Mr. Bennet dismisses all these great arguments because he is too lazy to deal with Lydia’s disappointment. He’s been a lazy parent and continues to be.
Mr. Bennet then takes on the responsibility for what happened, ““Who should suffer but myself? It has been my own doing, and I ought to feel it… No, Lizzy, let me once in my life feel how much I have been to blame.” (Ch 50). Lydia has been allowed to run around flirting with officers for months, without any check on her conduct. She does not act within the rules of society, and while Elizabeth and Jane have tried to correct her, Lydia knew they had no real authority. She needed parents and neither of them did their duty.
Mr. Bennet also acknowledges that he failed his daughters by not saving money for their future provision, “Had he done his duty in that respect” (Ch 50).
Mrs. Bennet shares this guilt, little as she will accept it: Mrs. Bennet, to whose apartment they all repaired, after a few minutes’ conversation together, received them exactly as might be expected; with tears and lamentations of regret, invectives against the villainous conduct of Wickham, and complaints of her own sufferings and ill-usage; blaming everybody but the person to whose ill-judging indulgence the errors of her daughter must principally be owing. (Ch 47)
Lastly, Lydia was failed by Darcy, who talks about his share of the blame here: “Wickham’s worthlessness had not been so well known as to make it impossible for any young woman of character to love or confide in him. He generously imputed the whole to his mistaken pride, and confessed that he had before thought it beneath him to lay his private actions open to the world.” (Ch 52). We see in Sense & Sensibility Elinor asking everyone who knows him about Willoughby’s character. Character references were important, that is how women knew they were safe in a man’s presence. Darcy knew the truth and he left Meryton and the Bennets in danger.
Lydia did make a choice (and certainly the wrong one), but she does not deserve all the blame for what happened. The narrator makes it clear that no one should be surprised by the outcome. Lydia was not taught was what right, she was not taught to control her impulses, and she was put out in the world too young, as Colonel Brandon said in Sense & Sensibility, “But can we wonder that… without a friend to advise or restrain her… she should fall?”
Related posts: Lydia too young to be out, Should Darcy have warned Meryton?
Because it's just like. Darcy did everything Lizzy ever told him to, yknow? He asked how she thought people should kindle affection and she said dancing, so then he asked her to dance. She asked what he qualifies as an accomplished woman, he looked at her and the book she was reading, and said a well read woman. She said he should talk while they're dancing, so he asked about her and her sisters going to Merryton. She told him he should practice talking to people he's not already familiar with, so he came over and visited her the very next day. You know??? Do you see???? He has been shouting from the very start that he cares for her, in his own way, just as Jane shouted her love to Bingley, in her own way. And then when she was visiting Rosings and Lady Catherine de Bourgh, his own aunt, was being obnoxious and rude to her, he felt the shame of having undesirable connections just as she had in the beginning. Do you see it!!!! Mr Darcy has been ardently in love with her from the very beginning, and he's been missing the parallels between their lives the whole time!!! He's so pathetic and sopping wet it hurts!!!
This is unnecessarily long, but: I was just thinking about Wickham's predation on fifteen-year-old Georgiana Darcy and then, almost exactly a year later, Wickham's predation on sixteen-year-old Lydia Bennet.
There are obvious parallels between the two incidents. In fact, they're so obvious that I think the incidents are sometimes treated as equivalent, with the consequences only differing by happenstance. I don't think that's true, personally.
There are some mechanistic sort of differences—Wickham put a lot more effort and planning into the Georgiana situation. He wanted to marry her for her money and to make her brother suffer. She had to be isolated from people who would look out for her interests, he had Mrs Younge in place, he had known Georgiana as a child and was able to exploit his own previous kindness to her as her father's godson, etc.
And Georgiana, despite all of this, and despite being swept away by a teenage infatuation with an extremely attractive man, was still uncomfortable with it. She was worried about disappointing a brother who raised her and whom she deeply loves and admires. When her brother actually showed up by surprise, she decided to tell him everything; Darcy takes pains to give her credit for this. Adaptations generally downplay Georgiana's active decision-making here, but the only element of chance is Darcy deciding to go to Ramsgate at all. He insists that he was only able to act because Georgiana chose to tell him what was going on.
This isn't meant to be an indictment of Lydia, though. Does she admire the parents who raised her? No. But why would she? Especially why would she admire a father who treats her mother and sisters and herself with profound contempt and no sense of responsibility? Why would she ever confide in him?
It's not like Lydia doesn't confide in anyone. In fact, she too confides in an older sibling, her sister Kitty. And in one sense, her trust in Kitty is not undeserved. Kitty does keep the secret. Presumably, she does this because, despite her occasional annoyance with Lydia, she is very much under her influence and goes along with whatever Lydia does. Regardless, she is trustworthy in that sense. Moreover, we see at the end of the book that Kitty is easily improved by being placed in better environments and taught how to behave. She just didn't know better.
How was she going to judge Lydia's situation correctly? Who was teaching her to judge anything correctly? Certainly not their parents.
If Mr Bennet had bothered to interest himself in his younger daughters and try and influence them for the better, impressionable Kitty is probably the one who would have benefited the most. The whole Lydia/Wickham thing would have fallen apart before it went anywhere if all the girls had been been properly raised, even if Lydia did exactly the same things.
And Lydia likely wouldn't do the same things if she'd been brought up properly and, you know, treated with a baseline of respect rather than being openly mocked by her father, the person most able to affect her development. Instead, at barely sixteen, she's been continually rejected by her father, over-indulged by her mother, and flattered by adult men (28-y-o Darcy says he and Wickham are nearly the same age). And she still tells someone what's going on, even though she doesn't care about her parents' opinions or the consequences of her actions. And she was under the protection of a colonel and his wife at the time, who also could have told someone or acted, and didn't.
It's not that nobody could have done anything about the Lydia/Wickham situation. It's that nobody did until Darcy found out and tried to extract her. But it was, in one sense, too late. To Lydia, he's just some unfun acquaintance who says boring things like "go home to your family and I'll do what I can to cover for you." That is, he tries to do what he did for Georgiana.
But Lydia is not Georgiana—she did not choose to tell him about any of this. She did not want to be extracted because she didn't know and couldn't be quickly made to understand what marriage to Wickham would mean in the long term. And she didn't care what her family thought because she had no reason to, pragmatically or psychologically.
Georgiana, otoh, did care about her family's welfare and the good opinion and affection of the head of her family. But despite their radical differences in personality, the most fundamental difference between the girls IMO is that Georgiana had every reason to believe that disappointing Darcy and losing his respect would be a change from the norm.
Normally he is affectionate and attentive towards her. They write each other long letters, he defends her to other family members, and praises her frequently. Georgiana, quiet and intimidated though she may be, talks more when he's around. Disappointing him had actual stakes for her.
Put another way, the potential loss of his good opinion mattered to her because he's gone to the trouble of raising her as well as he can and forming a good relationship with her. She chose to tell Darcy the whole thing because he had earned her affection and trust in a way that Mr Bennet has utterly failed to do. Even Darcy happening to visit Georgiana at Ramsgate comes from his affection and attention to Georgiana's welfare, even if he couldn't have known what would follow from checking on his sister at that particular moment.
Chance is always part of life, and it's part of the novel and these situations. But a lot of how these scenarios wound out was not determined by chance but by long-existing patterns in these girls' educations and relationships.
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