leezy-sleezy

autistic add // she/her

[sweetpeauserboxes]

[id: a light pink userbox with a pastel pink border and pastel pink text that reads “ this user loves to infodump.” on the left is an image of a pink heart./end id]

[lynneus4]

Why...JUST WHY does my brain process harder problems faster than the easier ones?? Sometimes I just don't get easy things at all. Like, in physics, I still don't fully get linear motion concept, and, at the same time, I'm literally best friends with projectile motion. Wtf is wrong with my brain.

[lynneus4]

Chrome, don't mind my 70 tabs. I need them all.

[lynneus4]

I fucking hate these talks about children and stuff. Just look, what I've had to hear.

Mom: When will you give me grandchildren??

Me: Never.

Mom: But you've got to! I GAVE BIRTH TO YOU SO YOU'LL HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE SAME THING!

Me: Never. There are enough people on planet Earth to destroy it. I don't want to make my contribution. Plus, I don't have a job, a partner, a healthy relationship, I've got no place to live on my own and I'm autistic.

Mom: That's no excuse.

Me: Then will you raise the baby instead of me? Provide it with basically anything it needs?

Mom: It's yours, why should I?

Me: Then quit looking in my uterus, please. One thing is to get laid and get pregnant. Raising a child is a serious matter. I don't want my children to be accidental like we and my siblings are. I don't want to traumatise them with their living conditions. I don't want them to see this stupid world, where one person forces another to have babies, as if it's so easy. Go have another baby yourself, if you're so eager.

And then she went feral :) I think I'll move out sometime soon, because the whole yelling thing is fucking my brain, my mental health and ears. I wish I could just move to another country to be completely on my own. Like all alone.

[lynneus4]

I want to give my cat a bath, but I'll definitely destroy the bathroom - must not forget how I broke that sink not so long ago, lmao.

And, most probably, I'll flood the house in the process.

Sucks to be me.

[lynneus4]

I hate being yelled at for no apparent reason.

My mom yelled at me today for, quote, NEVER HELPING HER, NEVER LENDING A HAND!!

Well, you know, you might just ask me to do things, like directly, no? Go there and trim the trees or whatsoever.

I do not understand your stupid hints, like, OH THESE TREES LOOK SO UGLY, THIS GARDEN NEEDS WHATSOEVER-ING.....

It needs that, and what of it? I could care less. Why the hell mention it to me?

You need help? Just ask me. Don't yell at me for not understanding your stupid NT tricks.

She knows about my autism, yet treats me like her other NT children. Never do this to your ND child. The yelling part will get things worse. I can say for sure, because now I don't feel like helping anyone at all. Just fuck your trees, Ima stay home, I did nothing wrong.

[lynneus4]

My stupid add brain during daily physics obsession time be like:

let's fail the easy problem and solve the hard one!

My autism, shaking hands with add brain: Let's.

And this is why I don't know what to think of my skills. It's truly frustrating.

[memeuplift]

[lynneus4]

I like Ronny so much

[lynneus4]

Don't really feel like moving today. At all.

[lynneus4]

I've literally spent 2 hours solving quadratic equations. They're so fun!! I hope I will be able to put them into use soon.

[lynneus4]

Cleaning the house up took all my energy away. Ugh. And if I don't have energy for maths or physics, I'm gonna be crying. Or furious. Anyways, on the verge of another meltdown.

[lynneus4]

Me: /watches vids on car maintenance/

Mom: /looks at the screen/ You don't know how to drive-

Me: And you don't own a car.

Mom: That's 1:1.

[lynneus4]

I like how these stupid bots evolve. Best show ever. (no)

[theadhdgoblin]

[lynneus4]

THIS.

[lynneus4]

I get so excited while solving equations. It gets to the point when I get soooo hyped and hyper, then accidentally forget about an x or something else and the result is, of course, false.

Aaand this makes me sad, that no matter how hard I try the results are never good.

[lynneus4]

Me: infodumping mom about random physics experiments

Mom: Wow, that's actually interesting!

Me: I'll say.

Mom: Sometimes it's scary how much you know about this stuff. Tell me you're not going to build a nuclear power plant... Or something worse.

Me: Nah, it's boring. And will require something like "calculus 1000 for year 2222 people". And lotsa money.

Mom: Now, that's a relief.

Me: Sometimes being broke is an advantage.

[lynneus4]

Feeling stupid again