Draco couldn't help but glare as he descended the stairs from the dormitories.
It was odd, even to him. He couldn't have cared less about Persephone's friendship with Blaise prior to the engagement, betrothal be damned. Now, however... Draco Malfoy was infuriated by the sight of his fiancรฉe cozied up to Zabini.
"Darling," Draco purred, approaching the two, and surprising himself with how genuine it sounded, how soothing he sounded, in contrast to the rage he felt.
Persephone looked up, confusion written on her features for a sixteenth of a second. Her face quickly smoothed into a smileโseemingly genuine, but Draco knew better.
Again, he made a mental note to learn the secret to her happiness.
"Blaise," Draco greeted. The boy nodded in response.
His fiancรฉe was small enough for him to fit in the chair with her. He rested a hand on her thigh and couldn't help but marvel at how his hand dwarfed her leg.
"Feeling better?" Persephone asked, a hint of concern coloring her tone. Another surprise.
"Much, thank you," he replied, managing a smile.
Blaise had his brow furrowed.
"You speak like business partners," he remarked.
Draco was aware of his quick temperโbut awareness was not synonymous with control, no, never for Draco.
"You'd do well, Zabini," he seethed, removing his hand from her thigh. "To keep yourself out of our relationship."
"Draco," Persephone warned. "That was unnecessary."
"I won't allow him to speak ill ofโ"
"You aren't in charge of him."
"I'll leave you to it," Blaise was smirking as he rose from his seat, and Draco resisted the urge to draw his wand and jinx him.
Persephone sighed, closing her eyes.
"Could you not be so sour?" she wondered, annoyed by the display. "He's right, Draco. Every interaction we have is as if...," she paused and ran a hand through her curls, struggling to find the words. "It's as if we're being held at wand-point."
Draco was silent, mulling over her words. Anger, of course, was at the forefront of his mind... but she was right.
But he smirked.
"Your love poem in potions seemed rather genuine."
She exhaled, the slight curve of her lips betraying her amusement.
"I thought I did a decent job of dressing up your... odor."
"Odor?" He asked, offended, and ruining their first semblance of a lighthearted conversation. He sounded the way he used to, pompous, stupid, and the realization dampened his mood.
Frowning, as if she had sensed the flavor of his distaste in the air, she ghosted her hand over his arm.
"Sorry, I justโ"
And without another word, he stood and made a move to exit the common room. He was tired, far too tired.
Draco Malfoy was too tired to pretend.
Every day that had passed since the first term began was as excruciating as the first.
Wren recognized that she had became the subject of scrutiny among her peers, and, honestly, she couldn't blame them. She would have been a fool to expect anything different. Between her sudden engagement and obvious personal deterioration, whispers and stares were the least of her worries.
But the unyielding gaze of Harry Potter was fueling her anxiety.
She wanted to tell him, to beg him, to stop, to let her focus on classwork and how to breathe. Green eyes followed her through classes, halls, and mealtimes. He observed her whereabouts, her tone, her gait... he was perceptive, it seemed, in matters related to Draco Malfoy.
Unfortunately, she had fallen under that category.
Wren assumed Draco was off plotting the murder of Albus Dumbledore when he hadn't shown for breakfast. Truthfully, it was bothersome that he was refusing to involve her in any plans he may have. For him, it wasn't out of care. It was his pride.
Blaise had elected to eat in solitude that grey morning. She found herself relievedโher own company was all she wanted. It was hard enough to choke down porridge alone... but with watchful eyes, it neared the impossible. Her status as Malfoy-to-be worked in her favor during such timesโan even wider berth was given to her than before.
Until Harry Potter appeared at her shoulder.
"Persephone," he greeted, awkwardly. "Erโhow are you?"
It was in that moment, when Wren found herself at the verge of hyperventilating, that she realized she may have needed psychological help.
The stares the interaction had already attracted made her hands shake more violently than they had already been prone to. She gripped her napkin so tightly that she thought her bones would burst through her skin.
He saw you on the train. He knows. You heard his bone crush under Draco's sole. You're not innocent. He knows.
She wondered if admittance to Saint Mungo's following a nervous breakdown would exempt her from the mission.
Breath, she reminded herself. He can't hurt you. You're in control. Act the way you were taughtโor you'll end up like mum.
In an instant, she had regained composure.
"Good morning, Harry," she greeted, with a smile that might have been dazzling months ago. "I'm alrightโready for the weekend, of course. Yourself?"
He looked slightly confused, which almost reassured herโbut she had hesitated a second too long. She knew he had caught it.
Breathe.
"Brilliant," he responded slightly too quickly. The word had tumbled from his mouth, indicating he had his script written and he didn't want to forget it.
"Um... was that all?" she wondered, mirroring his awkward disposition, and slightly cocking her head to the side. Good, play innocent, she praised herself. You can avoid this. Evade it.
"Well...," Harry scratched the back of his head, looking towards the Gryffindor table. She followed his eyes to the disapproving gaze of Hermione Granger, as well as the scrutiny of Ron Weasley.
"I was just wondering," he lowered his voice. "I was curious about your... relationship... with Malfoy."
"My engagement?" She continued to feign innocence. "What's there to be curious about?" She made a point to glance down at her engagement ring with a smile.
"You've never talked to Malfoy much before," his inflection was becoming bolder, challenging.
"Harry," she exhaled, still smiling. "Draco and I grew up together... I love him, and he loves me. It just... took us a while to realize, is all."
"I don't believe it," he whispered, harsh, an edge to his tone.
"I can't help you there, then," she returned, an edge forming in her own inflection. The stares from other students remained steady. She wondered what Blaise made of it, or if he cared enough to even pay attention. Her nerves had receded, shifting to irritation.
Harry searched her face, but she had molded her mask. She was impenetrable, unyielding.
"Persephone," his tone took on a different tone, one of... desperation. Pleading. "You were on the train. I know you know what's going onโplease, just tell me. I-I can help you, alright? I know you're not like him."
Fortunately for Wren, she had settled into her part, and was damn good at playing it.
"Listen, Potter," she hissed, cold, dangerous. "You'd do well to leave behind your delusions about myself, my fiancรฉ, and our relationship. Chosen One or not, you have no right to project your savior fantasies onto me. I don't need your help. I'll be sure your wedding invitation makes it to the cupboard under the stairs," she snarled, standing.
As she approached the exit to the Great Hall, she spotted Draco entering.
It was a snap decision, and she had never been so thankful for the unwanted attention the morning had provoked.
Taking in the tiredness, the irritation, the questioning written on his visage, Persephone Wren Bardick grabbed Draco Malfoy by the lapels of his suit and pressed her lips to his.
Shout out professor rj lupin for not flipping absolute shit when he sees harry with the marauders map in the hallway that night. i seriously cant stop laughing he could have gone oh FUUUUUCKK!!!!!!!!!! but hes got like plus 15 repression and a proficiency in Bullshitting so he just says โhmm yes yes oh is this a? a zonkos? haha cool.โ Legend.
YES my comfort character is remus and has been since elementary school. YES iโve been dependent emotionally on some of my high school teachers and YES i have had a crush on one of them. what about it
the dog grabbed the fox by the scruff it itโs neck, running as fast as his legs could take him.
blood was dripping on the ground.
the only thing he saw as he left was the stag hitting the wolf with his antlers.
she still bled.
the dog was traveling fast, far away from the wolf. the rat followed, as he could hear its body moving through the grass. the rat ran up the three trunk, hitting a specific knot, and the tree limbs froze, as if encased in ice. not a single leaf moved.
the dog and rat ran into a hidden tunnel, making sure to not be pursued or seen, though they knew they wouldnโt be, in the darkness of the night.
the dog placed the fox down, gently, and he transformed to his human form. frantic.
โcโmon luce, change back.โ
the fox changed back into herself. blood was spilling down the front of her headโso much was pooling that it was in mouth, staining her teeth.
the rat changed his form as well, the boy practically crying in from concern.
her hair was matted with blood, and her eyes were barely open from the impact she made being thrown aside by the wolf.
โstay awake, luce,โ his hands were shaking. โiโve got you, youโre gonna be okay.โ
the girl nodded, shakily reaching for something in her shirt pocket, half-dazed. the boy grabbed it, and he nearly choked out a sob.
โdittany and silver powder, vulpes, youโre amazing,โ he kissed her forehead, hands grasping the sides of her head. โyouโll be okay, alright?โ
โsirius, should we take her to madam pomfrey? she looks bad, i donโt know ifโ!โ
โsheโll. be. fine,โ he growled, through clenched teeth. โwe canโt blow our cover, fuck, wormtail. weโll be sent to azkaban.โ
โsirius, i donโt think theyโll send us there for becoming animagi!โ
โno,โ the girl spoke, finally, though it sounded labored. she winced as the boy dropped liquid from the vial on her wounds, a strange combination of brown and silvery. โheโhe can do it.โ
โwormtail,โ sirius, choked out. โgo back to prongs and make sure moony is contained. iโll be here with vulpes.โ
โbut what ifโ?!โ
โpeter!โ sirius nearly yelled. โi. wonโt. let. anything. happen. to. her!โ his hands continued to shake and he growled to himself out of frusturation. her wound was healing, closing up, but it would be noticeable. sirius hardly knew how to do healing magic, and she still had a concussion.
without a word, wormtail transformed and left. only the sounds of her labored breaths and sirius talking to her, to himself, remained.
โluce, donโt close your eyes, okay? your wound is healing, okay? i need to make sure you donโt fall asleep, that would be badโyou need to stay with me!โ his voice was crackling. it was pretty bad. she hardly looked conscious. even though she was healing, the blood loss was sirius' prominent concern.
โlucy,โ he mumbled. โhey, heyโjust look at me, okay? just look at my eyes and don't look away, got it? youโre fine, youโre okay, i promise.โ
โwhere is remus?โ she slurred, slightly. โis remus okay?โ
she was seeming heavily disoriented, at that point. sirius applied more dittany than what was probably necessary.
โremus is fine,โ sirius replied, distracted. โheโsโhey, luce, open your eyes! Lucy, vulpes, iโm sorry about this, but i need to wash the blood out.โ
water burst from siriusโ wand and he ran a hand through her hair to help clean it. she flinched away from it, as it was quite cold, but forced herself to stay still.
sirius then muttered what few healing spells he knew to attempt to lessen the injury to her head, to stop any more blood, but he could tell she was severely concussed.
โsirius,โ she murmured, after a while, opening her eyes wider.
โhow are you feeling?โ he was still frantic, but he dropped his wand to the side, feeling exhausted, anxious, from the prior events.
โyou fixed it,โ she told him, simply, adoringly, and he relaxed his muscles, sagging over slightly.
the man kissed the womanโs forehead, eyes closed as if it pained him.
โi shouldnโt see you for a whileโyou need to stay here,โ he told her.
โbut- but why? iโm safer with you, i should beโ!โ
โluce,โ he said, sadly. โitโs not safe. iโve already separated myself from remus, and-โ
โwhich is stupid,โ she countered, her tone stressed. โhe would never be a spy. he would never hurt harry! or lily, or james, or us! you canโt be so stupid, sirius.โ
he ran a hand through his long hair, frustration on his features. the fight was imminent.
โwe canโt be too safe these days, vulpesโyou know that.โ
she had a hard set to her mouth. โif you think that anything bad would happen to us apart wouldnโt happen separately, youโre full of shit, sirius.โ
โwell, maybe i just want to be away from you, anyway!โ
her face fell.
โwhat?โ
โyou heard what i said,โ he replied, coldly. โitโs for the best.โ
โokay.โ
โokay.โ
โbye.โ
โbye.โ
he vanished, leaving the girl alone.
the girl was screaming, crying, kicking things.
there was a man with her, watching helplessly. he had come over to see her as soon as he had seen the paper.
he was processing the news himself. he just stared, simply stared, tears rolling down his face.
โFUCKINGโFUCKING TRAITOR, WHAT THE FUCK!โ she screamed, sharp on her vocal chords, throwing herself against the wall. โHE FUCKING KILLED THEM! THEYโRE DEAD BECAUSE OF HIM! THEYโRE FUCKING GONE!โ
and she wailed, sobbing. screaming, as if she was being tortured. slamming into the things in her parlor, she grieved. driven to the point of near madness, she had broken.
she picked up a glass table and threw it at the wall, crystalline fragments exploding across the room.
the man, beginning to sob himself, restrained the woman in his arms, stopping her from throwing herself into the shards.
โlucyโlucy! lucy, stop!โ but she was thrashing against him, screaming at the top of her lungs, in utter despair.
it could have been minutes, hours, seconds, but they were on the ground, the woman still in his arms, struggling to fight. she was tired, as was he. she sobbed- she simply sobbed- and he had joined her.
adjacent to the mess of jagged edges, the pair cried.
he didnโt mean to stare, he didnโt, he knew it made her feel odd, but her buzzed hair made it more obvious to him.
lucy had stopped wearing makeup, and remus thought it was nice. he also thought her hair, or lack thereof, was nice.
but he could see the ghost of a scar on her temple, one that was quickly healed with dittany and silver powder. it was amazing, really, that it had become so unnoticeableโit could pass as a tiny childhood injury.
but, it never healed. to remus lupin, it was clear. to remus lupin, it was a fundamental piece of his self-hatred. a reminder of his monstrosity.
lucy was due to take over classes for him, as the first full moon of his stint as a professor was rapidly approaching, only within a few weeks of the start of the term. she sat at his desk, writing down notes. the students were due to revise pixies and imps, lessons from the previous year.
โrem?โ lucyโs eyes were concerned, but uncomfortable from his sustained stare.
remus was quiet, smiling, albeit awkwardly, and returned his attention to peering out of the window.
it was nearing the end of sunset, and the skies were beautiful hues of red and pink. jazz, remusโ favorite record, to be exact, was playing on the phonograph, softly.
โyou have guilt on your face,โ she accused, but gently. he knew she had risen to join him, from the soft scoot of the chair and the quiet step of her feet. she walked lightly.
she ghosted her hand over his shoulder, pulling him to face her.
he glanced at the scar once more, feeling unable to hide the source of his unease. he often felt unable to hide things from lucy.
โrem, it was forever ago,โ she assured him, voice dripping with honey, a calm ocean breeze. it almost soothed him. โit was my fault, anyhow. i couldnโt stand to see you harm yourself. i was stupid, yes, but it was my fault nonetheless.โ
โthe tiny grey fox against the big, bad wolf,โ he laughed, humorlessly, recalling a conversation from years and years ago. โi could have killed you.โ
โbut you didnโt,โ was her simple reply.
she quickly walked away, and within seconds she was putting a different record on to play. they had combined collections, and she drew out one of their mutual favorites.
starry, starry night.
the guitar chords of don mcleanโs vincent filled the office.
โnostalgia,โ she explained, suddenly next to remus once more. โdance?โ
it was another late night in the common room, and he was unable to sleep. the full moon was the next night, and it made him restless. his back ached, and he was moody.
lucy had joined him, as she often did, and tried to sooth him with a dance. it was awkward and clumsy, and honestly, they were quite lucky that they didnโt wake anyone with their laughter, hushed as it was.
remus smiled, arms looped around her waist, and her arms loose around his neck.
shadows on the hills,
sketch the trees and the daffodils.
catch the breeze and the winter chills,
in colors on the snowy linen land.
there was quiet laughter, reflecting on the familiarity.
lucy had always been different than the rest of them. she had the jagged edges, but they saw the soft curves that coexisted within her.
how you suffered for your sanity,
and how you tried to set them free.
they did not listen, they did not know how.
perhaps theyโll listen now.
she was daring, she was brave, she was intelligent. she loved muggle music, especially rock, and read a lot of booksโremusโ collection of muggle classics no exception. she simply devoured them.
lucy was infallibly kind, caring, and loyalโnearly to a detriment. she was able to talk sirius and james out of the near cruelty that they targeted at severus snape... on occasion.
severus still held that resentment, for all of them.
essentially, remus thought she was too good for this world, for being close to the likes of him. she was dancing with a lycanthrope.
she had her flaws, as humans did. she was reckless, she was selfish at times, she was quick to be irritated, and she was capable of cruelty.
and not that it was to her detriment as a person, but she was horribly sad. depression was her cage, similarly to remus, but herโs was more violent. much, much more violent.
for they could not love you,
but still your love was true.
and when no hope was left in sight,
on that starry, starry night,
you took your life, as loverโs often do.
but i could have told you, vincent,
this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you.
โhave you ever thought about it?โ
remus felt his heart sink. he knew what she had meant, almost too obviously.
โmore times than i could count.โ
she leaned her head against his chest, saddened. they had stopped dancing, just holding one another.
and it was true, as horrible as the truth was. even as a child, remus lupin had fully wanted to die. fully and truly.
โthere was no intent,โ he admitted. for, as much as he had wanted his existence cut short... he had reasons to live, people to love who, in return, loved him back, as bewildering as it was to him.
โthere was no intent for me, either... i had you. i have you. and that is enough.โ
lucy was too good, too vibrant to want that for herself, and remus tried to suppress the tingle of tears.
now i think i know,
what you tried to say to me.
how you suffered for your sanity,
how you tried to set them free.
they would not listen,
theyโre not listening still.
perhaps they never will.
the song came to a close, the final notes plucked on the guitar.
they were each otherโs reason.
and as he looked at lucy, as they were breaking loose from each otherโs hold, as she smiled at him and walked back to her notes...
