For your steadfast love is before my eyes, and I walk in your faithfulness;
2hollisxfemale!reader
the aftermath of recent events left you feeling dreadful, and for as much as hollis tries to make it up to you, he just can’t help but recur to his habits—and you fall right into them.
tags: roadtrip, smut (p in v), oral sex (male receiving), gunplay, graphic depict of violence, gun violence
a/n: a little lighter/filler chapter as compensation for the last one♡
That whole thing had stirred something loose in you, and you couldn't help it. For the most part you'd made your peace with what Hollis had done — he'd done what he had to — but your mind wouldn't let it go. Not all of it. Just one thing, the same thing, coming back on a loop at the worst moments: the shoes. Twelve pairs lined up too neatly along that basement wall, all different sizes, like they were waiting for someone who wasn't coming. You'd think about something else entirely and then there they'd be again, sitting at the back of your mind quiet and insistent.
Somehow, the gunshots you managed to file away. The grip on your leg, the blood — those you could quite reason through. But the shoes you couldn't explain, and the not explaining was what stayed with you.
At night you'd wake two or three times, jolting out of sleep, heart hammering. Once, Hollis caught you like that — he didn't make a thing of it. You were in the passenger seat, so he just reached over, touched your face gently, then left his hand resting on your upper thigh, drawing slow, shapeless patterns into your skin until you drifted back under. At least when you were in the same bed, all you had to do was press yourself against him and he'd hold you back. That certainty alone was something.
And that was the easiest part about all that, even though he'd noticed — he didn't meet you with impatience or questions you didn't know how to answer. You knew because of the small things. It was in the way he'd move with caution around you. Three days after the house, you'd flinched hard at a car backfiring on the road beside you, and when you looked over at him he was already watching you, steady and quiet, like he'd been waiting for exactly that and already knew what to do about it, which was softly caress your thighs, reassuring. He was just there. And he did not make it strange.
One night, in a town you were passing through, he insisted on going out. You were still too hollowed out and tried to refuse, but he insisted upon it in such a lovely way you gave in. You put on a simple mid-length dress, your boots, and a jacket Hollis draped over your shoulders before you'd even thought to reach for one.
You went to a bar and had dinner together — a decent meal, for the first time in what felt like forever. It was a simple small town bar, a candle on the table, a bartender who called you folks, someone playing guitar in the corner badly enough to be charming. From the outside it must have looked like a date. And somewhere between the bread basket and the main course you caught yourself thinking exactly that — this feels like a date — and underneath it, quieter: we are on the middle of nowhere, a man is probably dead on our account and I am sitting here thinking about how this feels like a date. You let the thought pass through you and didn't pull on it. You picked up your fork and kept eating and let yourself have it, just for tonight.
After you ate, you went through rounds of drinks. Hollis, oddly enough, had taken it upon himself to introduce you to alcohol. You tried beer, then whiskey — a good one, he said, though you couldn't tell the difference — then vodka, then tequila. They were all terrible. You had a sip of each and Hollis finished the rest.
"Alright, I think you're just not a drinker," he said. "Or maybe—"
He glanced at the menu and said something to the bartender. A round glass arrived, filled with something red, and you sipped it cautiously. For the first time it was actually good — didn't taste like alcohol at all. You looked up at Hollis with wide eyes and a wide smile.
"Jackpot," he smiled back. "Guess my girl has a sweet tooth."
His girl, you thought.
The drink was dangerous. You ordered another, and by the fourth round you felt lighter than air. Hollis was delighted watching you like this — loose and unguarded — and he was a little drunk himself, you thought, laughing more openly than usual.
You were humming along to the country song playing through the bar, not really thinking about anything, when you felt his eyes on you. Too steady, too intent. It made your cheeks warm and your breath go short — he could have the softest, most unhurried eyes of any man you'd ever met. Maybe of anyone. You wanted to kiss him, but not with all these people around.
"Can we go back?" you asked, your voice easy and light.
"Sure, honey." He was on his feet before you'd finished the sentence.
He settled the tab and then you were out on the street, the night air hitting you clean and cold after the warmth of the bar. You walked close enough that your arm kept brushing his, and at some point his hand found yours and stayed there. Neither of you said anything about it. The street was quiet and the motel wasn't far and the cold felt good against your warm skin, and you thought: I could get used to this. Matter of fact, you were getting used to it. And you held his hand tighter anyway.
Back in the room, Hollis stepped inside and started shrugging off his jacket, completely unaware that you'd been standing in the doorway watching him in silence for a full minute. Only when he sat on the edge of the bed did he glance back and catch you staring.
"What's wrong, pretty girl?"
"Nothing." You stepped closer. "You've been so nice tonight."
He smirked. "What you mean? I'm always nice."
It was a joke, but he wasn't wrong. "You are. I just wish I could repay you. For everything you've been doing for me."
"You're so fucking adorable," he laughed softly. "And a little dumb if you think you're not already."
He reached for your hand and pulled you to him. You settled between his open legs. He brought your hand to his lips, and you giggled.
"Want to do something for me?" You nodded immediately. "Then get on your knees."
It took you a second, but you did, lowering yourself in front of him. He was still holding your hand, so he guided it to his crotch, and you took over from there, touching him on your own. He smiled — that knowing smile that always made you flustered and warm. As you felt him growing hard, you reached for his zipper, pulled his jeans down, then his boxers. He was only half hard, but you worked him with your hands, then leaned in and let a slow thread of saliva fall to his tip. You were so focused on watching his cock harden in your grip that when his hand came to your face you flinched, looking up to find him watching you carefully.
"Can you use that pretty mouth on me?"
"I've never done that," you answered, still stroking him slowly.
"That's alright. I'll guide you."
You pressed your lips together before leaning in. You didn't know how he'd fit in your mouth, so you started by licking him — slowly, from base to tip, keeping your eyes on his face as you went.
"There," he said, when your tongue swept across his swollen head. "Now open your mouth, baby."
You did. "Wider." You opened further. "Stick your tongue out." You followed every instruction.
Holding himself by the base, he pressed his tip to your mouth — first tracing your lips with it, then resting it on your tongue. Feeling him like this was something else entirely. There was something about being taught rather than just taken — the patience of it, the way he watched your face more than anything else — that loosened something in your chest you hadn't known was wound tight.
"Can you suck on it?" You nodded and closed your lips around him — around his tip, at least.
You sucked lightly, working mostly that part of him until his hand pressed gently to the back of your head, encouraging you further. You took more of him, then drew back, then did it again. Every time he'd reach your throat, you'd draw back, so you worked the rest of his length with your hands. He didn't seem to mind, he seemed to like it cause sometimes, his voice went needy and those low, strained sounds slipped out of him — it made you wet just to hear it. You wanted to give him more, so you pushed yourself a little further, until it made you gag, and then you pulled back.
"Such a good girl," he breathed, when you found a rhythm that had him panting.
It filled you with something more than pride when he started to come undone — chest heaving, breath catching, voice failing him. He cursed as you felt him finish on your tongue, thick and warm, and you kept sucking until you'd taken the last of him. It was still in your mouth when he finally pulled away.
"Did you swallow?" he asked. You shook your head. "Can you do it for me?"
You nodded, and then you did. You knew his taste by now — that one time at the church you had tasted it — but taking so much at once made your nose wrinkle. He laughed at that and pulled you up into his arms.
"Now let me take care of you." He kissed your face, your neck, then moved lower, to your chest.
He pulled the straps of your dress down to bare you, and the moment he had you he sucked your nipple into his mouth, eagerly. You gasped at the sensation, your sensitive skin lighting up under his tongue, and all you could do was hold on to his shoulder and grip his hair. Hollis seemed to like that, because every time he did that it felt like he was starving for your body.
He ended up working his fingers into you right there in his lap, and he was so good at it that it didn't take long before you were crying out his name, rolling your hips desperately, begging without shame. He drove his fingers into you while his thumb circled your clit, kissing you sloppily and deeply all at once — so much happening at the same time that your edge came up fast and hard.
Even then he wasn't done with you. The night stretched on with him taking you in bed, pulling you onto all fours and driving into you with urge. You buried your face in the pillow from how undone it made you feel — mind wiped blank, reduced entirely to the sensation of him pounding into you. He was already so deep you didn't think he could go further, and then he laid himself over you, his weight pressing you flat into the mattress, one arm looped around your neck, his warm breath at your ear as his hips kept moving behind you.
He pulled out just before the end and came across your back with a rough, wrecked sound, while you lay completely spent beneath him. He crumbled to your side afterward, and you felt his hand on your face — so soft, so careful. You kept your eyes closed.
"You don't have to worry about a thing," he said. A kiss pressed to your cheek, and you could feel from the warmth of his breath that he kept his face close to yours even after. “My angel.”
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀
You woke the next morning to an empty bed. The sheets on his side were already cold. You lay there for a moment in the quiet, looking at the ceiling, and let yourself think about the night before — the bar, the walk back, his hand in yours on that empty street. You thought about the way he'd looked at you while you were humming to that song, like you were something worth looking at. You thought about him teaching you how to suck him properly — so patiently, so endearing it made lust turn into something else. You tucked it somewhere careful and got up to shower.
He was back by the time you were braiding your hair, and it caught you off guard when he showed you his new gun. This one looked heavier, and from the little your father had taught you, you could tell he'd switched models — from a revolver to a pistol. And of course he had, because guns can be traced. So it wasn't just you who'd been worried. Before you could sink too far into that thought, he held out something else — a gift, he said. A pocket knife. You needed to be able to defend yourself, he said. You took it in its sheath and tucked it into your boot, quietly hoping you'd never have to use it.
"I need shampoo," you said once you were back on the road.
"Don't the motels have it? I use theirs," he glanced over at you briefly.
"They do, but it's terrible." You ran your hands over your braids.
"Your hair looks nice though," he said, and you laughed. The way he said it, briefly glancing at you, so adorable.
"What?"
"Thanks, Holli." You leaned over and kissed his cheek. He smiled.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀
You got out to fill the tank while Hollis went inside for his cigars — you asked him to grab some snacks too. When you finished pumping you sat up on the hood and waited, but he was taking too long, so eventually you went in after him.
It didn't quite surprise you, what you found, but it shocked you.
Hollis with his gun leveled at the cashier, the man emptying the register with shaking hands. You stood in the doorway and just — looked. Not at the gun, which you knew. At him. You stood there frozen, you never actually saw him like that, the particular stillness of his posture, his attention, the way his eyes tracked the cashier with a calm that had nothing uncertain in it. This wasn't new to you, you knew he did this, it was just different. The same Hollis holding your hand last night was this one making someone tremble and fear for their life.
Then Hollis registered you.
"What—" Something flickered across his face, just briefly, before he recomposed “Honey, go back to the car.”
And you turned to do exactly that. No questions, just turned on your feet and walk back to the door. But you didn't make it to the door. Another man appeared — broad, tall, carrying a shotgun, frightening enough without it. He swung the barrel straight at you.
"On the ground, lady."
You'd never been held at gunpoint before. Seeing it up close made your body move before your mind could catch up. You lowered yourself to the floor.
"Drop the fucking gun or I'm putting a bullet to her head," the man called out.
It didn't take more than a second, you heard the scrape of metal on tile. Then the man stepped past you, and you raised your eyes to find him pointing the shotgun directly at Hollis, who was now on the ground, the man shouting over him but all you could hear was your heart slamming against your ribs, tears pricking your eyes. And when the man struck Hollis with the butt of the gun, you moved on instinct. You pulled the knife from your boot, crossed the floor, and jumped on the man's back. You drove the blade into his side once — it was all you managed, and your small knife didn't do much more than make him stagger — but it was enough. Enough for Hollis to wrench the shotgun from the man's hand and get to his feet, his pistol already in his other hand. The moment he was standing you let go, dropping to his side. He dropped the shotgun, kicked it away and had his gun trained on them now, and the thought of what he might do made your stomach clench.
"Don't shoot," you said quietly, low enough that only he could hear.
"Both of you, to the back," he said, his voice flat and commanding. "And hand over your phones."
They did as they were told. The man you'd stabbed moved slower than the other, a dark thread of blood spreading through the fabric of his shirt. They filed into the back room, and as they crossed the threshold Hollis looked at the cashier.
"Give her the keys."
The man handed them over without argument. You took them.
"Close the door."
They did, and you locked it behind them. Hollis swept the room after security cam — nothing. Then he grabbed the money bag and his cigars from the counter.
"Get your snacks," he said.
Somehow his ease made you easy too, even with your blood still going. You grabbed what you'd come for, and on your way out you stopped at a small display by the door and picked up a pair of sunglasses — white, cat-eye. He looked at you and smiled, then leaned down and kissed you. "Beautiful."
Back in the car, the adrenaline was still singing through you. Hollis was all loose smiles, some loud song shaking through the speakers. You didn't feel scared or wrung out, actually you felt electric. It kept replaying: his voice commanding both men, the gun steady in his hand — the one he still had in hands, resting against the steering wheel now, casual as anything.
“You're such a good girl,” Hollis said, that easy smile hanging from his lips. “Made me so proud.”
Maybe it was the adrenaline. Maybe it was the praise. You didn't stop to think about it. You pulled off your boots, then your shorts. Hollis glanced over, clearly surprised though still smiling, and in one motion he pulled the car to the shoulder and killed the engine.
That was all you needed. You climbed into his lap and kissed him the way you'd been wanting to — hard and desperate, pressing into him as his hands found your thighs, your ass, smacking you lightly and playfully. You could feel the gun against your waist as he held you with it in his hand. In between kisses he pulled your shirt over your head, one brief parting before you came back together in a wet, messy kiss.
"What's all this?"
He was reaching to set the gun aside on the passenger seat when you caught his wrist. He raised an eyebrow. You brought his hand closer instead. "I like seeing it."
"Yeah?" A small smile. "You complained about it enough when you first found out."
"That was before I saw you with it." You guided his wrist slowly — down your chin, your neck, down between your breasts, across your stomach — until the barrel rested against the front of your panties.
Some distant part of you registered what you were doing — you are guiding a gun to yourself and asking for it — and beneath that, quieter still: you would not have done this three weeks ago. But you just couldn’t stop thinking of the version of him you'd seen back there, and you thought about his hand in yours on the street the night before, and you understood that both of those things were him and neither cancelled the other out, and that you wanted both. You filed those thoughts away as you rolled your hips and stopped thinking entirely.
"What have you turned into?" Hollis said, and took over, pressing the muzzle against you. You rolled your hips, chasing the friction.
You sighed as he moved it against you. His other hand came to your face, thumb pressing between your lips. You sucked on it, still grinding against the cold metal, his gaze fixed on you and sharp enough to make you soak through your underwear. It was enough.
Your hands found his jeans, worked the zipper open, pulled him free — and he was already hard. You both moved at the same time; you lifted your hips, he pulled your panties to the side, and then he was sliding into you, deep enough to make your eyes roll back. Exactly what you needed.
You kept your eyes on him as you moved, whimpering with every roll of your hips, and he watched you just as closely. The barrel of the gun traveled slowly up your stomach, between your breasts, until he rested it beneath your chin.
"Faster," he said.
You went faster — bouncing on his cock in quick, urgent strokes, half because of the gun at your chin and half because your body simply demanded it.
"Crazy bitch," he said.
You bit your lower lip after hearing that, and braced both hands on his shoulders to keep the pace. But he'd stop you, Hollis grabbed both of your hands and folded them behind your back, your wrists together as he held them with one hand. The gun still on your chin, his gaze so sharp you could swear you saw him gleaming at you. He pressed the gun harder against your chin, the cold metal making you shiver, his grip on your wrists so tight you swear it'd bruise later.
“My beautiful, beautiful angel,” he said hoarse, breath catching.
He caressed your face with the gun in hand, your cheeks, your mouth, it made you whimper at that and that was exactly what tipped you over: your whole body shuddering and then shaking on top of him, the orgasm tearing through you while you bit your lip so hard you tasted blood.
He let your wrists free and his arm circled your waist instead. Then he began thrusting up into you — hard, lifting your body with each stroke. You cried out, overwhelmed, barely keeping yourself upright.
You knew he was close. And when he moved to push you off him, you held on, grinding your hips down.
“Want me inside?” He asked with an airy voice and faint smile.
You nodded, compressing your lips in the heat of it.
"Please," you breathed, eyes on his. You kept moving, kept clenching around him — and that was all it took. A low, wrecked sound broke from his throat as the first of him spilled into you, warm and sudden enough to make you gasp. You could feel as he filled you up, the heat of it spreading across your skin smooth, from inside out, that warm fuzzy feeling getting you almost numb. You stayed still above him, both of you unraveling, neither of you speaking.
You kissed him slowly, and he held you so tightly afterward that you knew it had gotten to him too.
Then — a gunshot. You turned to find him pointing out toward the open field, the window down. You laughed. You kissed him again as he laughed with you. In that moment you felt completely outside yourself — weightless, untethered, way over the edge of anything that had ever felt ordinary.
🜲 You unexpectedly fall in love with one of the knights from the castle of Tenflower. It was something you had to keep secret, for it was forbidden for a knight to be with a princess.
tags: tenflower au, knight!hollis, princess!reader, forbidden love, sneaking around, fist kiss, loss of virginity, marathon sex, oral (m + f receiving), fluff angst And smut, reader is inexperienced but not really innocent, happy ending don't worry
warnings: slight blood, brief descriptions/mentions of torture & capital punishment
w/c: 11k
a/n: thank you to @stellalaylas for the idea for this fic! i also made it a little inspired by berserk as well :p this is my longest fic ever now wow. ignore the fact that hollis' hair in his medieval era was brown and i described it as blonde in this fic i just thought it was Fun. also ive said this before but i am not good at medieval speak nor do i know how trials work etc etc so it might be a little unrealistic but i find that fun Idk. as usual no screenshotting/talking about this fic outside of tumblr/my ao3 <3
taglist: @fatalfairie @holilove @sayitagain22 @222foryou222 @tellmeimsafe @ang3l0fd3ath22 @wakeuppfilthy @aisforarii @stellalaylas @catmeowsstuff @voidatelier @2lilaclace @bloodshotbastard @hollisedd @girl2bad @luvvconceal @gnariii @warhorseweekend @sweet2sin @sqddleagain @2drea @natesibsdih @angelrazor6000 @qiyokuliife @222cellmate (if you are this user and still on here lmk if you’ve changed ur @!) @mageterna1111
read/support on ao3 or on here ↓
Being the princess of Tenflower was lonely.
That was the best way to describe it. It’s not like you were alone. You had your family, your servants, daughters of aristocrats you frequently spoke with.
But you were never able to really live due to your overprotective father. You weren’t able to interact with the public or go out of the castle without his permission. You had given up on asking to go places long ago. He always said no.
So you spent most of your days in your room. Luckily, it was spacious and full of everything you’ve ever loved. Everything you ever needed was in the castle.
You stared outside of your room, book in hand. The sky looked pretty this time of night. When you were having trouble sleeping, you always pulled a book out to help.
The wind from outside lightly blew your hair back. You could see the entire city from the castle. You could see the individual windows of the buildings, some with light on and some not.
You saw a couple galloping down the streets in the middle. You were far away, but you could tell they both had big smiles on their faces. Probably drunk from the bar they came out of. You wondered if you would ever be as happy as them.
You sighed and closed your book. You felt sleepy, finally.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
“The knights are sparring in Tenflower Square today.” Your mother spoke, taking a sip of her tea.
“Cool.” You responded, more focused on biting into your eggs. You weren’t really the most interested in the violence of that stuff.
“The family is expected to be in attendance today.” A beat. “That means you, too.”
You dropped your fork. “What?”
“You’re coming.”
“Mama, I’ve told you I don’t like watching fights.”
“There won’t be any actual bloodshed this time. It’s just to demonstrate the skills of the Tenflower army for the city’s enjoyment. They fight to protect you, you know. It’s a reminder of how you’re in good hands.”
You sighed. None of this ever interested you.
Your mother noticed your annoyed expression. “Tell you what. If you go with us to the spar, I’ll talk to your father about letting you go to the bookstore across town. By yourself.”
Your face instantly lit up. “Really?”
Your mother closed her eyes and nodded. “But only if you come with us today, will he consider. The royal family in full is expected.”
You couldn’t pass up an opportunity to leave the castle. You’ve always heard about that bookstore, how it had almost every book you could think of.
“You’re awfully excited. I thought you didn’t like this sort of stuff.” Your servant Cecily said, helping you into your dress. Cecily has been working for your family ever since you were born. You felt closer to her than your own mother, sometimes. She felt like a part of the family at this point.
“I don’t. Mother promised me something, though. So I’m coming.” You smiled, daydreaming about the aisles of books you were hopefully going to look through soon.
“Figured. Want me to do your makeup all heavy, like the girls do?” She walked you over to your vanity to sit down. She was talking about your friends, they were all the epitome of femininity. You, not so much. But you preferred that.
“I guess just this once won’t hurt.”
The sound of your heels, that were honestly too big for you, echoed off of the halls of the castle. Your parents smiled satisfactorily when they saw your outfit while waiting at the end of the hall.
“Oh, my wonderful daughter!” Your father exclaimed, walked up to you and brought you into a hug. “I’m so happy you’re coming. The residents of Tenflower will be overjoyed to see their princess. You look wonderful.”
You hugged your father back. Your mother was beside him smiling as well.
“Are we ready to go?” The driver was beside them. It was almost time for the spar to start.
“Yes, let us go.” She replied. “Come on, (y/n).”
Outside, the horse carriage was waiting. It had been a while since you’ve been in one. In that time, the castle had upgraded the carriage to a better one with more comfortable seating. You got inside with your parents and sat on one side, while they sat on the other. The horse neighed when the driver moved the reins.
You stared out of the carriage window as it left the castle. Everytime you left the castle you felt yourself constantly staring at everything, like you were trying to take everything in.
The spar wouldn’t be all boring. Your friend Charlotte was to be there. She was a fan of all of the violence, and would watch it with a smile on her face.
Your parents were having a conversation. Something about kingdom politics. You tuned it out and zoned out with your eyes on the window. As you got closer to Tenflower Square, you could hear the sound of a huge crowd.
Luckily, you wouldn’t have to go through it. There was a separate route that went straight to the section you’d be sitting in. When you arrived there and walked out of your carriage, you saw Charlotte right next to where you’d be sitting.
“(y/n)!” She grinned, greeting you as you came to sit.
“Hello, Charlotte.”
“What are you doing here? I thought you hated stuff like this. Always called me weird for it.”
“I do. But my parents promised to let me go to the bookstore across town if I went, so.” You smiled smugly.
“Ugh, I knew there was a catch. Sit down though. It’s gonna start soon. I have to point out this one knight to you, he’s so handsome. And he’s the best ranked knight in the whole army.”
“Really?” You replied back, a little disinterested. You planned to space out during it mostly.
“Yes. You’ll notice him, he sticks out like a sore thumb in comparison to the rest of them. Like a prince.”
Your eyebrows raised at her description. “I’ll keep a look out, then.”
Charlotte knew you likely wouldn’t. She was happy you were here, though. The initial smile when she spotted you didn’t leave her face.
She was what you could call your best friend. You have been friends for a long time now, ever since you were a child. She had just always been there. Her hair was brown, usually kept up in a braid. Her eyes were the same color. Her face had freckles across the middle, full lips, and small eyes.
A horn sounded through the square, signaling that it was time for the spar to start. You focused on the middle.
The announcer called out two knights to start. Ain and Hollis were the names.
You glanced over at Charlotte. She was at the edge of her seat with her eyes wide open, not wanting to miss a second of it. The fight started, and both knights lunged at each other.
It was an admittedly impressive sight. The one on the right had calculated movements. He moved fast. But so did the one on the left. It looked like they had practiced together many times before.
The crowd gasped when one of them got on top of the other. The announcer’s voice rang through the square again. Cheers erupted. The one called Hollis had won this round.
It went on for two more. Hollis won one, and Ain won another. Overall, Hollis was the winner. Cheers erupted once more, and both of the knights took off their helmets to properly bow.
“That’s him.” Charlotte leaned over and whispered to you. She didn’t have to tell you, you already knew.
He was… not as rugged looking as the other knights. His face had a feminine like feel to it, with chin length blonde hair. He looked around the area, waving to everyone watching. He was much taller than the other guy, too.
“Isn’t he handsome?” Charlotte giggled.
“Looks like a pompous ass.”
Charlotte hit your arm lightly.
“Hey! Am I wrong? Men who look like that are surely full of themselves.” Admittedly, he was handsome. He caught your eye immediately. As he walked off from the middle, you saw him be congratulated by the rest of the knights, including the one he just fought. He seemed popular within them.
“I would be too if I was that beautiful…” Charlotte said dreamily.
You rolled your eyes lovingly at her. She seemed to think every guy was handsome, always pointing one out to you that you weren’t impressed by. But this one…you could hear her out. Just a bit.
The rest of the spar was boring, as you predicted. You just didn’t see the appeal in watching dudes fight, especially when it’s not a real fight. But at least your attendance would get you something this time.
You clapped whenever everyone else clapped. You spent the majority of it daydreaming about something. You were broken out of your trance when you heard your name called by the announcer, and your mother tapping your shoulder for you to stand up with them.
Everyone was looking at you. It was rare for you to have public appearances. They clapped for you, and you waved around at the crowd. In an elegant way, like your mother taught you.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
When it was over, there was a ball at the castle. You tried to go back to your room and read, but your mother stopped you and told Cecily to go upstairs and get you into a new dress for the ball, which ultimately meant you had to come. You groaned on the way there and Cecily exchanged a sympathetic look with you.
At least Charlotte would likely be in attendance. So you wouldn’t be too bored.
The hall was bustling with people. A certain number of knights from the spar were invited. Including the one Charlotte pointed out to you. He was surrounded by girls pestering him about how good of a knight he is.
You instantly found Charlotte by the table of sweets and drinks. “Hey.” You tapped on her shoulder.
She turned around, mouth full of cake. “Hey!” She smiled. Her cheeks resembled a chipmunk with peanuts stuffed in its mouth.
“Don’t talk with your mouth full.” You snickered.
She swallowed it. “Sorry. Your chefs make the best cake I’ve ever had. How long have you been standing there?”
“Not very long. I just got here. Your crush is quite the ladies man.” You tilted your head towards the night from before, surrounded by maidens.
Charlotte sighed, now stuffing her face with small sweets. “I hate those girls.”
“You’re jealous?”
“Duh. I could never go up to him and– he’s walking this way.” She interrupted herself.
“What?”
“He’s walking this way!” Charlotte muttered in a harsh whisper. She quickly swallowed her sweets, wiped her mouth off, and made herself presentable.
You looked in his direction. He was coming your way with two other knights. You recognized one of them as his sparring partner. What surprised you the most was that he was coming up to you.
“Excuse me?” His voice went through your ears for the very first time. “Princess.”
“Hello.” You responded.
“I wanted to introduce myself to you, since your presence is such a rare occurrence.” Hollis kneeled, and boldly grabbed your hand. “I’m Hollis. My number one priority is to protect you and your family.” He kissed the back of your hand. It was a common gesture, for knights that wish to pledge loyalty. But you would be lying if you said your heart didn’t skip a beat.
Due to how overprotective your father was, you didn’t really have contact with boys. You’ve read countless romance novels, behind your parents’ back, so you know about the whole world of it all. This was the first thing you’ve experienced anything close to it.
Hollis’ hazel eyes looked up at you after. You felt flustered, and quickly muttered out your next words. “Thank you.”
You could see Charlotte out of the corner of your eye, with hers wide open.
“My pleasure.” He smiled, standing up. He walked away with the rest of his friends.
Charlotte slowly turned to you with your mouth open. “...How did you not scream?!”
“It’s a common gesture.”
“Your face is red, you know.”
“No it isn’t.” You smiled, pouring yourself a drink.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
The knight’s quarters were always rowdy, as most places filled with only men were.
Hollis sat at one of the tables in the dining hall, with Ain and his other friend, Simon.
“You have got a fuck ton of balls.” Ain said, drinking a beer. “Seriously.”
“I couldn’t believe my eyes. You were lucky the king wasn’t there, he would've had your head immediately.” Simon said.
Hollis’ fingers trailed across his lips. “Her hand was so soft. I seriously think she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”
“Too bad she’s off limits.” Simon said. “Her attendance is so rare because the king keeps her locked up in the castle.”
“Wants to protect her chastity at all costs.” Ain added.
Ain and Simon snickered at that. They noticed Hollis wasn’t laughing.
“What? Don’t tell me you like her.” Ain’s eyebrow raised.
Hollis leaned back in his chair. He shrugged.
“Hollis, you have all the maidens in Tenflower to choose from, that are actually attainable. Snap out of this.” Simon said.
“Yeah, like she’s hot and all but if you actually tried anything and they found out you would genuinely be executed. Not worth it.” Ain grimaced, thinking of the sharp blade of a guillotine.
Hollis took a sip of his beer. “I know.”
“I think you just need to get laid. You’re too focused on fighting to see all of the girls throwing themselves at you.” Simon said.
Hollis downed his beer. “You’re right.”
Hollis laid on his bed in the knight’s quarters. Next to him was a girl. He didn’t quite catch her name, Matilda or something like that. She was completely knocked out, with only her underwear on.
Despite the interaction he had with her, the princess was the only one on his mind. He remembered your kind face, your pretty hair, the softness of your hand.
It was useless. Not even sex could distract him from the feelings that immediately formed.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
You barely slept last night in anticipation of being able to go outside tomorrow by yourself.
Your parents told you more about how it was going to go. The driver would take you to the bookstore by carriage, you’d go inside and get all the books you wanted, and then come back. No stops. That was fine for you.
The ride there was pretty long, so you brought a book to read on the way. You heard the ambience of outside; children playing, bells ringing, people living their lives like normal. As privileged as you were to be the princess of this city, sometimes you wondered how life was being a normal citizen. Being able to live your life freely.
“We’re here. I’ll wait for you by the door, come out when you’re done, alright?” Your driver said to you.
“Okay.” You replied. You walked inside of the bookstore. It was as amazing as you imagined it. Aisles and aisles full of all kinds of books.
You already had a few books in mind that you wanted to get. Thankfully, the books on the shelves were organized in alphabetical order so they would be easy to find. When you leaned down to search through the books, a worker came up to you.
“Let me know if you need anything in particular.” She said. Her eyes went wide when you faced her, and she realized who you were. “Princess! What an honor!”
“Hello.” You smiled shyly. Her loud voice upon seeing you irritated you just a bit. “I have a few books in mind, already. But thank you.”
The worker nodded. She seemed nervous to be in the presence of a royal, especially one with very minimal public appearances. She left you alone while you got your books.
You got fantasy and romance books, mostly. You purchased them with the help of the lady you saw from earlier, then went back outside.
“Done already?” The driver said, reading a newspaper.
“I already knew what I wanted.”
He smiled. “Get on in, then.”
When you arrived back home, you weren’t ready to go to your room just yet. So you took a stroll around the castle.
It was always busy with people doing things. You found it fun to people-watch. Your strolling led you to the area where the knights reside.
More specifically where some of them train one on one. A room filled with swords and other equipment. You peeked inside, and your heart skipped a beat.
Hollis, the knight from yesterday, was inside practicing. He didn’t have his armor on, so you saw his figure. He was slender, but still had some muscle. You watched him fling around the big sword he always carried. His moves were so calculated. His body moved along with it. His hair fell over his face.
When he moved his blonde hair out of his face, he noticed you. You jumped a bit when his eyes met yours, that were peeking around a corner.
“Hey there.” He smiled. His eyes had a kind look in them. “That you, Princess?”
“Yes.” You moved out from your hiding spot, shyly putting your hands behind your back.
“What a pleasure.” He put the sword in his sheath. “What brings you here? Quite rare to see you two days in a row.”
“Just walking around.” You answered him. “How are you so good at that?”
“What, this?" He pointed to his sword. “My father taught me how. Been swinging swords around since I was a child.”
“Was your father a knight too?”
“Yup. Not in this town, though. He moved us here when he left.”
“Cool.” You nodded.
He smirked. “How long have you been spying on me?”
Your face went a little red from prolonged conversation with a male around the same age as you. It was exactly like the romance books you read. “Not long.”
“Well. I don’t mind, either way. I take any chance to show off.” Hollis grabbed his sword out of the sheath and struck the practice dummy on one side of the room.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Now that you’ve noticed Hollis, it was like every time you left your room you caught a glance of him. He was hard to miss.
And he never left your mind. Not after he kissed your hand at the ball and your interaction in the training room.
The next time you interacted with him, you were in the courtyard taking a stroll through the garden. It was a calm afternoon. The gardner was tending to the flowers, making sure all of them were in their best state.
You walked down the stairs to the other section of the garden. On the way down, your foot missed a step.
“Oh sh–” You yelped. Everything happened at once. You thought you were going to land flat on your face, until you felt the arms of someone catching you.
You looked up. It was Hollis.
“Gotta watch where you’re going, Princess.” He smirked.
“Thank you.” You replied breathlessly, laughing nervously. “What are you doing here?”
“Knightly duties.” He shrugged. He was carrying a bag full of something.
“I see.” You were still a bit flustered from how he grabbed you. “Sorry to bother you.”
“You’re not bothering me. I was just passing by.” He leaned on the railing by the steps. You walked closer to him, still wanting to continue the conversation.
Hollis’ eyes focused on you. He could hardly believe how close he was.
“So, what are you doing out here? I didn’t know the king let you out this far.”
“He lets me take a stroll through the garden sometimes. I just like seeing all the flowers.” You motioned to the madonna lilies above you. “It’s very beautiful.”
“Yeah, it is.” He said. You noticed his eyes were still on you, barely even glancing at the flowers.
“Um…” You fiddled with your fingers, blushing under his gaze. You weren’t really the best at conversation.
He chuckled low, reading the situation. “I gotta get back to work. Nice talking with you, Princess.”
You stood in the same spot while he walked away. You let out a large breath you were holding. You swore your heart rate was record fast the entire time.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
The next time you saw him, you were spying on him training again. And like before, he noticed you.
“You should start announcing your presence. Scared me.”
“I want to try.” You said, pointing to his sword.
“This?” He held his sword up.
You nodded, walking close to him.
“Princesses aren’t really supposed to fight, you know.” He handed you the sword.
“It doesn’t matter.” You took a good look at it. It was pretty heavy. You’d be able to use this to defend yourself, but not in the smooth way that Hollis does. You tried an experimental slash through the air and nearly knocked yourself over.
“Woah, be careful. You almost chopped my arm off!” He laughed. He got behind you and fixed your form. “Wield it like this. Doesn’t that feel better?”
“Yes.” He was so close to you. You looked next to you, and his handsome face was right there. You quickly broke eye contact. He let out a chuckle at that.
“Why are you so nervous around me?”
“I’m not nervous.”
“You can’t even look at me. Am I that ugly?”
You audibly laughed at that. “No, no!”
“Something else then?” The bass of his voice vibrated through your ears. You looked beside you again, and his face was closer.
You lowered the sword, and his hands traveled from your arm to your waist. A chill went up your spine. It felt like the romance books you read. The quiet moment right before the female lead is about to kiss the male lead.
You were broken out of your trance when you heard footsteps. Both of you quickly separated from each other. You were right to do so, because the footsteps belonged to your father.
“(Y/n)! What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in your room, doing lessons with Cecily right now?” The king asked. His voice wasn’t full of anger, but rather surprise and confusion seeing his daughter in the knights section of the castle. It wasn’t a common sight.
“That ended a while ago, Father…” You muttered, embarrassed to be slightly scolded in front of Hollis.
“She was just passing by and decided to say hello. Your daughter is quite a curious soul, she was watching me train.” Hollis covered for you. “I was waiting for you.”
Your father has one on one lessons with the knights sometimes, as he is very skilled in swordfighting. “Alright, well it’s good to see that you’re warming up.” Your father turned to you. “My daughter shall be off.”
You sighed, starting to walk out of the training room. What your father says, goes. Hollis watched you leave. When your father’s back was turned, you gave him a quick wave. He smiled at you.
“Your daughter is a very nice young lady.” Hollis said to your father.
“Well, of course she is. She’s my daughter.” The king answered smugly. “She did not interfere with your training?”
“She was just peeking at me while on her stroll.”
“Peeking at you from the inside?” The king said inquisitively.
Hollis' tongue went in his cheek. “She got startled when I noticed her. She came in just to get a close look at the sword. Nothing more.”
The king nodded slowly. “Alright. Just making sure. She’s gotten more rebellious as of late. She just wants to wander everywhere and do everything but her princess duties.” He laughed.
Hollis laughed along with him. Deep down, he felt a little bad. He seemed like such a strict father. That had to be hard to deal with.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Little by little, Hollis became your second best friend after Charlotte. You kinda felt like an asshole being attracted to Hollis when Charlotte had a crush on him too.
You were in the dining hall surrounded by Charlotte and some of your other aristocrat girl friends, and the knights table was across from you. Hollis kept stealing glances at you.
“Hollis keeps looking over here.” Charlotte whispered to you. “I might be imagining things, but I swear he’s looking at you.”
You looked at her. “No. It’s you he’s looking at, surely.”
She pursed her lips and furrowed her eyebrows in doubt. “Oh come on. You don’t have to do that.”
“Do what? Don’t you like him?”
“I do, but I know I don’t stand a chance with him.” Charlotte looked over again. “See! He’s looking at you!”
Hollis' eyes were indeed on you. When your eyes met, he waved. You waved back. His entire table was bantering about something, so they didn’t notice his interaction with a literal princess.
Charlotte’s mouth was open. “Okay. There’s something you’re not telling me. Come on.” She stood up, motioning for you to go by the door to talk for a second. You stood up as well.
“Where are you guys going?” One of your friends asked. Her name was Isabelle.
“Just going to chat for a second. Be right back.” You said.
When Charlotte was certain nobody was around the two of you, she started talking. “Why didn’t you tell me you've been talking to Hollis?”
“I’m not–”
“(Y/n). I’m not stupid. I’ve heard the rumors.”
“There’s rumors?” Your eyes widened. It would not be good for Hollis if those rumors reached your father.
“Some people spotted you going in the direction of the knights section of the castle whenever it’s Hollis’ day of training. People talk.” Charlotte threw her hands up. “So, what's the truth? Just a coincidence?”
You sighed. “It’s true. We’ve become friends. But I didn’t immediately tell you because that’s your crush! I didn’t want you to feel bad.”
“Nooo, it’s fine! You know me, he’s not even my only crush.”
“You cannot tell anyone, okay? Especially my father.”
“I won’t. Lips are sealed.” Charlotte made a zipping motion with her hand by her mouth. “But, how is he? Is he a pompous ass?” She referenced the first thing you said about him.
“Surprisngly, no. He’s really nice.” You smiled to yourself, thinking about it. “Can I tell you more later? I’m still hungry.”
“I was going to say the exact same thing.” Charlotte giggled. “Yes. Talk later.”
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Words couldn’t describe the adrenaline rush you got from sneaking around the castle just to hang out with Hollis.
Right now, you were on a stroll like usual. But in the direction of where the horses were kept. Where Hollis currently was, with his horse.
When you arrived there, he was tending to it. It was a blonde, white horse. It kind of reminded you of him, they looked similar. He brushed the horse’s mane. His hair fell slightly on his face.
“Hello.” You said, opening the fence. The fence made a loud noise that made him turn around instantly.
“There you are. Come here, I want you to meet Apollo.” He grinned, petting his horse.
You walked up to him, pulling your dress up a bit so it wouldn’t be dirtied by the ground. You extended a hand out to pet his horse. “His mane is so soft.”
“It’s ‘cause I take such good care of him. Do you have a horse?”
Your face fell a bit. “No. It would stay here if I did, not ever to be used. I wish I had one though.”
“Wanna try riding him? He’s a nice horse, real calm. Not gonna throw you off or anything.”
“I’m kind of rusty…”
“It’s okay, just get on. I'll help.”
Hollis helped you onto the horse. He got on right after, putting his hands on your waist. You never noticed how big they were until you looked down and saw them around your body.
“Alright, now just grab on the reins.”
You jumped a bit when the horse started to slowly move. The last time you were on a horse was when you were around thirteen years old. It felt nostalgic.
“See, he’s nice.” Hollis smiled at you.
“He is nice.” You pet the horse as it trotted around. “He’ll be gone with you tomorrow?”
Hollis was going on a short expedition tomorrow with the rest of the Tenflower army.
“That’s right. I won’t get to see you for a few days.” He sighed, putting his head on top of yours. “That’s gonna suck.”
You giggled at his phrasing. “It will. But perhaps it is a good thing, I’ve been behind on my studies because of you.”
“Well, don’t ask me for help. There’s a reason why I’m a knight and not a scholar.”
After a few laps around the area, Hollis helped you off of the horse. “Well. I suppose I should let you get back to studying.”
“Please come back safe.” You looked up at him through your eyelashes.
Hollis blew air out of his nose and smirked. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it.” He was right. He wasn’t the top ranked knight for nothing. You had nothing to fear.
Desire panged through you at those words. You grabbed at his shirt. Got a little closer. He didn’t flinch.
He could read your mind. He knew what you wanted to do, and knew you weren’t quite confident enough to do it. So he took the lead.
Your very first kiss had a horse watching.
It was funny to think about. But the kiss with him could've been anywhere, and you would've felt the same way. His lips were so soft. He grabbed your chin so gently.
When you both pulled off of the kiss, he immediately smiled from ear to ear at your flushed face. You were speechless, feeling so many emotions at once.
“Better get going, princess.”
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Lying awake that night, you replayed that moment with Hollis over and over in your mind. You couldn’t believe how perfect it was. You’ve dreamed of a romance like the one you read in books for years. And you got it.
You caressed your lips. You craved another.
You thought about telling Charlotte, but this was something you absolutely had to keep secret. It’s too risky. As much as you trusted her.
It being a romance that only you and him knew about almost made it better. More intimate. Special.
You put your hand on your chest, feeling your heartbeat.
This was it, really. You could never go back from this point. Regular friends don’t kiss each other.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
When Hollis came back, you got the courage to tell him to meet you at one of your secret hideouts in the castle.
Through one of the many rooms inside of the castle was a staircase behind a bookcase that led to a small part of the rooftop.
You sat with him up there. The walls were so high up that nobody could see the two of you.
Naturally, you took the opportunity to kiss again.
You could tell he was experienced. You, on the other hand, weren’t.
He giggled at how you kissed. So eager yet clearly inexperienced. “Easy, there.” He spoke softly, with a hint of a laugh in his words. “So cute.” He muttered under his breath, leaning in to kiss more. His tongue entered your mouth, but it didn’t feel gross at all. You welcomed it.
You melted under his touch. It felt so good, it made you forget you weren’t supposed to be doing this in the first place.
Hollis had you on his lap on the ground. Your light pink dress looked brighter as it fell over his dark pants.
His hands went on your thighs. You pulled off of the kiss when they trailed under your dress. “U-Um…”
He winced. “Sorry. You didn’t like that?”
“It’s not that I didn’t like it, but…”
“No need to explain yourself. It’s okay.” He spoke softly. It comforted you. “Still wanna kiss?”
You nodded. He smirked and leaned in again, locking your lips together.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Hollis didn’t tell his friends about the developments of your guys’ relationship either.
They did notice he was acting differently. But they didn’t really know why. They had their suspicions, though.
Hollis, Ain, and Simon were all hanging out in Ain’s room. Simon and Ain were playing cards, and Hollis was on the bed reading a book.
“That’s rare for you.” Ain said.
“Yeah. I thought you didn’t like books.” Simon said.
“I changed my mind.” Hollis said, flipping the page. “Sometimes that happens.”
Ain and Simon looked at each other. Not much is known about the princess to the general public. But what is known is that you’re a total bookworm.
They both giggled, knowing that they were thinking the same thing.
Hollis furrowed his brows and dropped his book. “What, you guys think me reading is funny?”
“No, no. Continue, sir.” Ain said.
“That’s what I thought.” Hollis went back to it.
“You guys wanna go to the bar tomorrow? I’m itching to talk to women. I’ve been around men too much lately.” Simon groaned.
“I’m down.” Ain said. “What about you, Hollis?”
Hollis turned the page in his book. “I’ll pass this time, I think. I’m not really in a bar mood. I drank too much last time.”
Ain and Simon exchanged a knowing look once again.
“Alright. You can stay here with your books.” Ain joked.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
You kept secretly meeting Hollis. And every single encounter would involve a makeout session.
The spots got more and more risky. Something about the risk of being caught made you excited. But you still had to be careful.
One of your encounters involved you showing Hollis where your room was after quadruple checking that nobody was in the hall to see him all the way up here.
That was how he ended up outside of your door at one in the morning.
You were the most confused you’ve ever been opening that door on that night. A tall, wet, dark figure at this time of night would’ve made you scream immediately. You almost did until you realized who it was.
“Hollis…?” You answered the door in your night gown. His clothes dripped rainwater onto the floor.
“May I come in, princess?” He asked. His voice was hoarse. Like he had been screaming or crying.
You nodded and let him in. “Take this off, you’ll get a cold…” You took his coat, putting it on the spare hanger. “What is the matter? How did you get past the guards?”
“Don’t worry about that.”
“I’m still confused. You’re lucky I was awake, I couldn’t sleep.” You gave a half smile.
Hollis walked up to you. He grabbed your chin, bringing your lips together. Your hands rested on his back.
He immediately deepened the kiss. He was different tonight. You couldn’t tell, and it seemed like he didn’t want to tell you why. That was okay. He could later.
You gasped in the kiss when his hand groped your breast through your gown. “H-Hollis—”
“Hm?” He acted like nothing he was doing was out of the ordinary. You whimpered when his finger rubbed your nipple through the fabric. “No good?”
“That’s not…ah—“
Hollis walked you both to your bed. You sat down, and he made you lie on your back as he kissed your collarbone, still playing with your breasts.
“(Y/n).” He called out your name. He usually just called you princess. “I love you. Very much.”
“I love you too.” You responded, overcome with happiness.
“That’s why I want to do this.” Hollis’ hand trailed up your thigh, agonizingly slow. “I want to make love to you. Is that okay?”
You knew the question was coming, but you still felt so shocked. “Don't people only do this when they are married...”
Hollis sighed, and went back to kissing your collarbone and neck. “When two people love each other, they do this. It feels amazing. The pleasure is out of this world. Do you not want to experience that with me? We do not have to...but I really fucking want to.”
“I want to.” You blurted out. “With you.”
“Are you sure?"
“I’m sure. I want that with you, Hollis. I trust you.” You smiled.
Hollis grinned when he got your consent, overcome with joy. He immediately began to undress you. He unbuttoned your gown from the top.
Your face went red when your breasts were exposed to him. His large hands cupped both of your boobs. “Beautiful.” He muttered under his breath. You yelped when his mouth went on the right one’s nipple.
“Are you sensitive here?” He asked, licking the bud.
“I-I don’t know…”
“Does it feel good, baby?”
Your mind melted at the petname. You nodded.
He continued sucking on your nipples. You felt your lower half pang with arousal.
He looked incredibly hot right now. Your hand patted his blonde hair.
When he was satisfied, he began unbuttoning the rest, until your naked body was fully on display for him. He got in between your legs.
“Don’t stare…” You put your hands on your face. Hollis was looking right in between your legs.
“How can I not…fucking beautiful.” He let out a chuckle. He couldn’t believe this was real life, and he was really in front of you like this. “Princess.” You gasped when his thumb began to trail up and down your pussy. It was so wet already from the boob sucking. “Don’t be scared, okay?”
You wondered just what he was going to do, until he lowered his head in between your thighs and you felt his tongue on your most special place. You moaned loudly immediately.
It was ticklish. You’ve never really touched yourself down there, let alone had someone lick it. You could tell this was another thing he was experienced with.
You tried not to think too hard about the other women he might have done this with.
His tongue trailed up and down your cunt, getting it wetter than it already was. You had to put your hand over your mouth when he wrapped his lips around your clit and started to suck.
His hands held your lower half down on the bed. The sensation was so strong, you almost instinctively tried to run away. But he kept you there, and pleasure wracked throughout your body.
Your eyes rolled back when he began to move his tongue fast on your clit, wiggling it around in circles. You let out all of your noises in your hand. You would be screaming if it wasn’t there, alerting the whole castle.
“Do you like it, princess?” He looked up at you from in between your legs.
“Yes.” You answered breathlessly. “M-More…” You begged.
“You are so wet…Amazing.” He went back down, licking your entire pussy. It felt like he was doing what he usually did when he made out with you, but on your vagina. “You taste wonderful…”
Your eyelids twitched. Your lower half got warmer. You couldn’t tell what was coming. Evidently, Hollis knew as he pulled off when it was. You laid on the bed and regained your breath.
“I can’t hold back.” Hollis stood up and pulled his pants down. What came out was a penis. You never saw one in real life before. You sat and stared at it.
Hollis began to stroke himself. You didn’t really have a reference point, but he seemed…big. You swallowed nervously.
He noticed your worried face. “It will be okay.” He stroked your leg. “It will feel good.”
Hollis spat on his hand and lathered it over his cock. When he angled the tip to your small, virgin entrance; It finally hit you what was about to happen. The tip felt bigger when it was near there.
“Ready?” He asked.
You bit your lip and nodded. You’ve wanted this for so long. It’s only natural. If your parents didn’t find out, it’s not like you’re doing anything wrong. You love Hollis, and he loves you. This is what people in love do.
When Hollis began to push in, you didn’t have time to cover your mouth before you cried out loudly in pain.
“A-Aaah—!” You gripped the sheets behind you.
He pushed in more, and a drop of blood fell onto the sheets below. To go from being completely closed to being opened like this, it would’ve been worrying if there was no blood.
You panted heavily. It hurt. Really bad. You wondered just how this was supposed to be pleasurable. It felt like you were being split in two.
You looked down, and he was still barely half way in.
“Do you want me to stop?” He leaned down, caressing your cheek. His face was full of guilt.
You shook your head, determined to take him all. He pushed in more. He was so deep.
You gasped and shook, grabbing his back when he was fully inside.
“I’m in.” He leaned down to kiss your face. He kissed the tears forming in your eyes. “You feel so amazing. Oh my God.”
You grimaced when he started moving a little faster than you could take at the moment. “Please…go slower.”
“Right. I’m sorry. Are you okay?”
“Mhm. You’re all the way inside.”
“That I am.” He chuckled. He put his forehead on yours.
He began speeding up bit by bit. He started thrusting at a different angle, and all of the sudden waves of pleasure started to go through you body. “Mm…what is that?”
“What’s what?”
“That place. Ah—!”
Hollis started focusing on rubbing the tip there. “Here? You like it here?”
“Yes. Feels...good.” You moaned. Your nails scratched his back as he started going faster, focusing on that spot.
“Ahh. Shit. I’m gonna cum so quick. You’re so tight and warm.” He rambled.
You squeezed around him every time he hit that spot. Hollis let out sounds of pleasure every time you did that.
An unfamiliar feeling in your tummy began to spread. It was so new to you. Of course, from what you’ve learned in your studies, it was an orgasm. You’ve never had one. But you assume this was what they were talking about. The cock in your pussy was pushing you towards something.
You wrapped your legs around his waist. He sped up even more. The pain of the stretch mixed with the pleasure of what he kept poking at was unbelievable.
“I-I’m…” You could barely speak. It was coming, and coming fast.
Hollis could tell you were close. You looked like you were malfunctioning. And your pussy kept squeezing. “Going to cum?” He licked his hand and brought it to your clit.
You whined at that. The combination of him pounding your pussy and rubbing your clit was too much. Your moans got higher and higher until you finally went over the edge.
Your eyes rolled back and you bit into Hollis’ shoulder and orgasmed for the very first time. Your hips shook violently and you screamed into his shoulder.
It was incredible, the pleasure beyond your comprehension. You swore it lasted several minutes. Hollis kept thrusting inside, seemingly close to cumming too.
He panted under his breath. “Fuck, I'm cumming—” One last thrust and the dam broke. Ropes and ropes of semen painted your walls.
When he was done, he collapsed into your arms. Your virginity was gone. It was a bittersweet feeling. You know you likely shouldn’t have done this, but you loved Hollis too much to care.
You kissed sloppily, his cock still in you. Your mind was clouded with love and lust. It felt so, so good.
The corner of his lips rose up when he felt your body start to move again on him. He was still hard.
You looked right in his eyes. “I want to do it again.”
You had to bite back several loud moans with you now on top of him. You rode him to the best of your ability, grinding your hips.
Below you, he watched in awe. In such a short time you became so hungry for his sex. It was a wonderful sight. The innocent princess was now completely naked on top of him. He was naked now, too.
You let out a guttural moan when he started thrusting up from below. He held you in the air and started pounding.
You panted with each thrust. He wasn’t being gentle like before, but it still felt so good. You wanted more.
“More.” You asked him, leaned over by his ear. “Please, harder.”
“Yeah? You want more, princess?”
You nodded. Your eyes were teary from the pleasure.
“Get on the bed. All fours.”
You got off of his cock and obeyed his instructions. He got behind you, angling his cock at your entrance with his hands on your hips.
You whimpered loudly as he thrusted in all at once. “Ah…you’re so tight, baby. I’m so lucky.”
You arched your back and gripped the sheets. He pounded you hard, making the bed creak just a bit. You blushed at the sound of his balls slapping against your pussy and his hips against your butt.
Your tongue hung out by itself with the sensation of his balls hitting your clit while he fucked you deep.
You were going to cum again. Your breaths got heavier. “I-It’s coming!! Don’t stop!”
“Not stopping. Don’t run from it.” Hollis kept his pace. “Cum on me, princess.”
Your eyes rolled back once more. You creamed on his cock, biting the sheets to not make any more noise. The sex sounded wetter now that you have cum twice.
You winced in overstimulation when he kept going.
“I’m almost there, ‘m sorry.” He gripped your hips and went faster, chasing his orgasm. He thrusted all the way in when he came, not letting a single drop of cum leave.
He collapsed on the bed next to you. You looked over at him.
His hair was sweaty, his face was flushed. You didn’t realize how hot he looked naked. He had abs. It wasn’t a surprise, most knights did. But seeing it in person right next to you, after you’ve just made love with him was different.
“Staring at me?” He opened one eye.
You grabbed his dick. It was half hard now. You wanted it to be fully hard.
“You want it again, baby?” He chuckled. “Wow.”
You gave his cock a few strokes, and then boldly put your mouth on it.
“Oh, shit.”
You sucked on the tip. You saw this in one of the books in the library. Kama Sutra. You never checked it out, but would take sneak peeks of it when no one was looking.
You tried to fit him deeper into your mouth but gagged and pulled off. That scared you. You tried again though, trying not to hit the back of your throat.
Hollis’ hand patted your head. He stroked your hair, it greatly relaxed you.
He was fully hard again. Which meant you could go again.
Something about this activity you couldn’t get enough of. Now that you’ve got it, you wanted more and more until you couldn’t take it anymore.
Hollis fucked you from behind in a spooning position on the bed. It was slower this time, but pleasurable all the same.
He whispered sweet nothings in your ear, rubbing your nipple as he fucked slow.
Despite the slow pace, you already felt like you were going to cum again. He grabbed your cheek and put your mouths together. He held you and kept going until both of you came together. You gasped into his mouth.
After that, you almost immediately fell asleep.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Hollis stayed awake. He watched your chest rise up and down. You looked so peaceful sleeping. So beautiful.
The light shone through the window now. He ran his hand through your hair. He knew he had to leave now. He would’ve loved to stay and wake up with you.
He got up from the bed, and put his clothes back on. They were scattered on the ground by your bed. You got your coat off of the hanger by the door as well.
He took one last look at you on the bed, before leaving.
He tried his absolute hardest not to be spotted. He sighed in relief once he saw the exit to the knight’s quarters being empty. Once he walked through it, he jumped violently at the sudden sound of swords being drawn, and a gruff voice.
“Stop right there!”
Hollis pursed his lips and turned around, with his hands up. It was the guards of the castle.
“Sir Hollis. You know the rules, correct?” The one in the middle held his sword up to Hollis’ neck.
“I do.”
“Then you do know it is severely punishable to sneak into the castle at night, into the princesses’ chambers?”
Busted. Hollis couldn’t help but smile to himself in defeat.
“What, you think this is funny? It’s punishable by death.”
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
When you awoke, the castle was louder than usual. You heard hurried footsteps outside of your door and chatter outside of your window.
You yawned and rubbed the sleep out of your eyes. You looked down. You forgot last night wasn’t a wonderful dream. It was reality.
You didn’t have much time to reminisce before your mother came bursting into your room. You held your covers over yourself, as you were still naked.
“Darling, are you okay?” She cooed, coming to your bed and bringing you into a hug.
“Yes, why?”
“A knight snuck into the castle after hours. Cecily said she saw him in here, touching you. Are you hurt?”
She was talking about Hollis. Your heart dropped. They caught him. You shook your head.
“Let me see, maybe you are and you don’t realize it.” She pulled at the covers. You kept them up. “Sweetie, just let me–”
You had a brief tug of war session with the covers of your bed, until your mother’s strength overpowered yours and she saw all of you.
You had no clothes on. But what she noticed more was the red stain on the sheets. “What’s this?”
“Mother, he did not hurt me.”
Her face changed when she realized the situation. “You…”
“He didn’t. Hollis is innocent.”
“‘Hollis?’ Who is Hollis?”
“The knight. Who came in my chambers last night. I let him in. He meant no harm. I…I love him.”
Her face contorted in confusion. It eventually changed to anger. She raised her hand and slapped you across the face. You sat there in silence, your head still in the direction that she slapped you in.
“(Y/n). I don’t know if you know this, but you’re a princess, not a whore. I let you off the hook a few times. I let you have friends of your own, that weren’t given to you by me. But to go this far…” She shook her head, and got up. “Someone is going to die because of you. Do you understand?”
Your mouth quivered at that. ‘Die.’ They were going to kill him? How did they even know, how did Cecily see him? She’s usually never awake at that hour.
“Mama, no. Do not kill him!” You teared up.
“Better go tell your father that. He’s furious. He believes that you were forced by him. I don’t know if I have the heart to tell him you weren’t.”
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Hollis grunted in pain with each lashing to his chest. He was stripped down to his underwear, restrained to the ceiling.
Your father was relentless. As soon as he found out the situation, he didn’t hold back. His daughter had been defiled. It was something that made him more mad the
“How does that feel? The weight of your sins.” He yelled. “Forcing my daughter like this…I almost want to kill you slowly, instead of letting you off easy with the guillotine. What do you think?”
“I didn’t force her.” Hollis said. His voice was hoarse.
“What was that?”
“I didn’t force her.” Hollis forced himself to be louder.
“Bullshit. My daughter would never have done this. She’s a good girl. You…corrupted her.” He lashed Hollis once more. “I knew I was right to be suspicious of that time in the training room.”
“I didn’t do any of the sort. Your daughter is in love with me, as I am with her.”
“Delusional. Absolutely delusional.”
Hollis laughed, coughing a little at the end. “Why don’t you ask her yourself? How I made love to her for hours.” He was intentionally provoking him. Probably wasn’t a good idea, but he was bored.
The king’s eye twitched. He hit Hollis once more with his whip. Hollis groaned in pain again.
“You’re not going to kill me. You need me. That army is worthless without me in the forefront, and you know it.” Hollis continued to provoke him.
He spat out a laugh. “Everyone is replaceable.”
“That applies to everyone in that army but me. You’ve said that before. Don’t take it back now just ‘cause you’re angry.”
The king walked over to the table, getting out a gag. “You talk too much. This’ll shut you up.”
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Your face was stained with tears. You waited for what felt like hours until your father was done torturing Hollis. Once you heard he was free, you rushed to his office.
“Father!” You cried out once you got in. Your father was sitting in his chair with a grimace on his face.
“My daughter…say it is not true.”
“What?”
“That knight, he swears that you and him are in love and that your interaction last night was not forced. He’s delirious.” Your father scoffed.
“That is…what I came here to tell you. Father, please do not kill him. He meant no harm. It was my fault, I let him in.”
He shook his head with his eyes closed. “He broke a rule. The only punishment is death.”
“No!” You screamed. “Don’t, please. I beg you!” Tears streamed down your face once more.
Your father couldn’t say no to your face. Ever since you were a child, in situations like these you could get what you want if you begged enough.
“You really love this knight so much?” He sighed.
You looked up at him and nodded. “So much that I want to marry him.”
“Marry…” Your father scoffed, letting out a cold laugh. “He is nowhere near fit for your hand in marriage. Not anywhere near. But…” Your father leaned on the wall, thinking to himself. “If he really means that much to you…I will think about it.”
“Oh, father, thank you!” You let out a huge breath in relief.
“He will still be punished, though. He’s not getting off easy, just because you for some odd reason see him fit to be your husband.”
Your father left the room, and slammed the door behind him.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Hollis was in a cell. It was pretty boring. All there was, was an uncomfortable bed and a toilet that looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in decades.
He had a lot of time to think about what was going on. It had been a few days since he got caught. He tried not to focus on it too much. Oddly enough, despite the gravity of the situation, he was still happy.
He was happy he got to make love to you. Happy that he was in love, and you loved him back. He could die happy, if it just meant that he was in your heart for years to come.
His daydreaming ceased when he heard footsteps. He thought he would be taken back to the torture room, but saw two familiar figures instead.
“Ain. Simon!” He let out a laugh and got up, going to where they were at the front of the cell.
“You are absolutely fucking insane.” Ain laughed. His face was filled with worry, still.
“How…how did you do this?” Simon asked.
“It’s a long story.” Hollis said. “Does…everybody know?”
“They don’t know the full extent. People were told that a knight snuck into the castle, not that it was you or that you fucked the princess in the process.”
Hollis let out a sigh of relief. That was good. He was feeling a little embarrassed, thinking of the possibility of the entire town hearing about it in full.
“Will you both be at the trial?”
“Of course.” Ain said.
“Listen.” Hollis started. “I’m sorry for not listening to you guys. But I’m in love with her. I couldn't hold back my feelings. She loves me, too. The king won’t accept that, but I'm telling the truth.” He looked back and forth from Simon to Ain.
They both looked at him with sympathetic facial expressions.
“I…think they might kill me. If they do, I just wanted to tell you I'll forever cherish all of that time I spent with you both. You’re both my best friends. For life.” He stuck his hands out from in between the bars as far as he could. Ain and Simon walked up and held them.
An hour later, you came to his cell. He rose up so quickly from his bed when he saw you.
“Princess.”
“Hollis. I’m so sorry you’re in this mess.” You frowned seeing his state. He was physically roughed up. You could tell he was in pain, from whatever your father did to him in the torture room.
“It’s my fault. Do not blame yourself.” Hollis stuck his hands out from between the bars. You grabbed both of his hands.
You felt tears coming again. “I’ve brought good news.”
“And what’s that?”
“I convinced my father to let you live.”
“Oh, thank God.” He sighed happily, hanging his head.
“Your trial will still end in a punishment, though. I told him how I wanted to…marry you.”
“You want to marry me?” He said softly. He was surprised by that.
“Yes. I don’t know how that will change the sentencing but…” You smiled, a tear falling off of your chin. “You won’t die. I won’t lose you.”
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
You sat by your mother for the sentencing. You hadn’t talked to her in a while ever since she slapped you. Her usual comforting presence now felt very cold. Her gaze felt like you were being judged.
Hollis was in the middle of the court room, handcuffed to the chair. The judge listed all of Hollis’ crimes. How he came into a
Your father was pacing in front of him. While there was a judge, your father ultimately decided the outcome.
“You will not die. You can thank the princess for that. However," Your father started, standing right in front of him. Hollis looked up at him. Despite his life kind of being on the line, he didn’t look that worried at all. “If you want to regain my trust and prove your loyalty, I want you to go up to Tenflower hill and slay the dragon there. Alone. And come back with it’s head.”
Murmurs exploded around the room. Your heart and face dropped. You thought he would get off with doing time in the jail, or mandatory service around the castle. Not…this.
Everyone knew it was a death wish. He could've sentenced Hollis to death, and the outcome would likely be the same.
Not even groups of people all together could defeat that dragon. Years ago, a group of knights went there to slay it in the promise of a cash prize. Not a single one of them came back from it.
“Can I bring my horse?” That was Hollis’ only reply. His face didn’t falter.
You stared at him in disbelief. Did he know just how fucked he was? His face still had that confident look on it, identical to the one he had on his face the very first time you laid eyes upon him in Tenflower square.
“You may.”
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
The very last time you saw Hollis, he was with his horse. The same horse he had you ride in one of your many encounters. The same horse that watched you have your first kiss.
You weren’t alone in watching him leave. His friends, Ain and Simon had seen him off. You were watching from above.
The night of when he left, Charlotte came to your room. “(Y/n).”
You turned around on the bed. Your face was stained with tears. Your mouth in a frown.
“Oh, (y/n).” She came to your bed and pulled you into a hug. “What have you gotten yourself into, huh?”
“You know everything?” It has been a while since you’ve had a conversation. People talk, like she said before. She must know the story by now.
She nodded.
“Mother told me I'll never see Hollis ever again.” You sobbed into her shoulder. “Everyone else is saying it too, that–...that he’s a goner.”
Charlotte didn’t say anything. She just rubbed your head. There was nothing she could say and be 100% certain about it.
“Do you think he’ll come back?” You asked, looking up at her.
Charlotte’s mouth hung open. She didn’t have the right words. “There’s a possibility.”
“I’d rather he just died here, if father was going to order that. At least…I’d know.”
You cried into Charlotte’s arms for a bit. She was truly a great friend. You regretted not telling her about this sooner, and that she had to learn from the chatter of the townsfolk.
She slept over that night. It was probably supposed to be awkward that she was sleeping in your bed, and had her arms around you, but it wasn’t. It made you feel a whole lot better.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
two weeks later…
“Dinner’s ready, (y/n). Do you want me to bring it up here?” Cecily knocked on your door.
“Yes.” You shouted from your room.
It’s been two weeks since Hollis left. It felt like forever. To be honest, you didn’t want to give up hope. But everyone around you had. It was hard to keep believing in something when everyone else didn’t.
You didn’t leave your room like before. You stayed holed up in there. Cecily started to bring food up to your room when she realized you weren’t coming down to the dining hall like before.
You didn’t have it in you to be truly mad at her, even though it was her fault Hollis was gone. After all, it was her job to protect you. She had no prior context to the situation.
You were depressed. Charlotte visited you often, coming up to your room to talk to you about her day. You enjoyed listening to it. It took your mind off of things. Her life was pretty eventful. She made you laugh for the first time in forever.
But when she was gone, it went back to before. Thinking about him. You wish you could’ve spent more time with him before this happened. You didn’t regret that night at all, but it was agony now that he wasn’t here. You craved his touch. His touch that you may never feel again.
You let out a shaky sigh. You’ve already cried so much, no more tears came out. You had dark circles on your face from not sleeping as often. The only thing that truly brought you some form of happiness was your books, per usual.
You avoided the romance ones for now.
.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲 ‧₊˚ ⋅
A few days later, you finally got the courage to leave your room again. You realized that staying in it for too long was making you feel worse.
You were sitting by the castle entrance, sipping tea, and eavesdropping on nearby people. Your hearing was oddly good for this type of stuff.
Two of the guards were talking about something. Castle duties. One sentence caught your attention.
“Do you see someone walking there?” The guard pointed outside.
“No?”
“Look closer. Looks like he’s carrying a dragon’s head, or something.”
You stood up straight from your seat and almost broke your neck looking outside. The figure was walking extremely slowly. It did indeed look like a figure with a dragon’s head. But they were too far away to really see it.
It’s not until they came into view that more guards started to look. The person was visibly limping, bloody, and also had a horse with them.
…It couldn’t be. You had already given up hope, leaving you no choice but to go back to the life you lived before you ever knew of his existence.
But as he got closer, you saw a glimpse of his blonde hair. You knew there was only one person it could be.
“It’s Sir Hollis!” One of the guards shouted, making the whole hall erupt in noise as everyone realized who it was.
You were speechless. You almost thought it was a dream. But no, as the figure came closer, you realized it really was Hollis. He had done it.
The guards and everyone in the castle waited by the entrance. Moments later, your father came down after being alerted of the situation. His face was doubtful at first, until he got a good look.
“Impossible.” He muttered, glancing at you for a second. He bursted through the front door.
Hollis was closer now. You got a good look at him. He was covered in dry blood, it was hard to tell if it was his or the dragon’s. He was completely exhausted, and so was his horse. When he looked up and saw all of you standing there, especially you, he stopped and collapsed to the ground.
Gasps erupted. You pushed back the crowd of people and ran towards him.
“(Y/n)!” Your father yelled. You ignored him.
“Hollis…” You whispered, kneeling down to where he was on the ground. He lifted his head up to look at you like it hurt. “You’re back.”
Hollis opened his mouth to talk, and coughs came out. When he finally spoke, his voice was so hoarse.
“I’m back.”
He smiled after. The same smile you had missed so dearly all those days, and thought you would never see ever again.
hollis invites you for a ride, and you slowly begin to understand more about his world — and how much it suits you.
tags: depictions of violence, smut (p in v), kinda freaky;weird, lowk s/m, oral sex (female + male receiving), public sex.
a/n: it took me a while because i was trying to figure out how to portray this one scene, it’s one of my faves, but it’s finally here!!! this is the second part of a now series based on crash (1996). it’s basically about people getting turned on by car crashes, so if that makes you uncomfortable or weirded out, don’t read it<3
Ever since that day, you fell into a state of awareness. You crossed streets double-checking your surroundings — a screech of tires would startle you, someone hitting the brakes or just a buzzing sound — and you weren't sure if it was trauma, or if you'd simply been expecting to happen again. To feel it again. To see him again. Because for a whole week, he made no contact. You waited and waited, days stretching into nothing. And for that whole week you obsessively replayed everything: the crash, the meetings at the hospital — sometimes you'd even dream of him watching you — then that last day, the car, his scent, his touch, all of it bleeding together into something that drove you almost insane. That led you to searching for logic in it, combing through accounts of other car crash victims and how they coped. Barely anyone shared that same after-effect. Barely anyone wrote about staring at a car too long, as if it were something alive — and no one had a story about finding the man who almost killed them and ending up fucking him.
One night on the second week, just after getting home from work, curiosity won you over and you searched his name online. It took some effort, but you eventually found an instagram profile — you only recognized it was him because of a single photo of a car, with a comment calling him "Hollis." The username was 2cross22, and despite an amount of pictures of expensive cars, open roads, and places from around the world you could probably only name three or four, there was one photo of a girl in his passenger seat that you immediately recognized as his girlfriend. She was tagged, and shamelessly you found yourself on her page, digging for anything else about him — and there he was, posing in some of her photo dumps, captions reading my love or just a heart emoji that would say enough, so tender you'd think he was the perfect boyfriend. That made you feel awful. But it didn't last, as you scrolled back to his page and landed on a photo of his hand resting over a steering wheel, you felt it again — that heat, that thrill, the vivid sound of the impact, and the ache of wounds still fading under your skin.
Those wounds were the last tangible reminder of that single encounter, and they were healing. Your neck no longer hurt, your arm was almost fully recovered — you weren't even wearing the sling anymore — and your broken ribs barely stung when you breathed. But that night, staring at the screen, at his long fingers gripping the wheel, your hand found its way between your thighs. Naturally. You touched yourself to the thought of him, whimpering softly, imagining it was his hand there, pressing against your clit — his fingers, his mouth.
You nearly missed the notification when it popped up on your screen. It was past 1AM, and you might have ignored it if it hadn't been from an unknown number. And an unknown number was all you'd been waiting for.
Unknown Number: you there?
You opened it before you could think twice.
Me: yeah, who's this?
Unknown Number: Hollis
You bit your lower lip, your finger still moving stubbornly as your heart raced.
Hollis: you free on friday?
You: you mean tomorrow?
Hollis: yes
You: guess so
Hollis: great. be ready by 10pm, i'll pick you up
You: can i know where we're going? so i dress properly
Hollis: just a ride, i wanna show you something, but if you wanna get pretty for me i won't mind
You: sure, i'll be waiting then
Hollis: see you
Just that, and you felt it all over your body. You got off staring at the screen — not even his picture anymore, just his texts. Stupid, embarrassing, but it made you impossibly turned on.
The next day you could barely focus on anything. You were working as maître d' while your body finished healing cause you couldn't serve tables yet, and God, you were scattered — all you could think about was later. Even your colleagues noticed, commenting on how you kept spacing out through lunch.
By the time it was nearly 10PM, you'd been ready for an hour and a half, nerves humming. You kept studying yourself in the mirror — your black dress, your dark tights — wondering if it was too much. But he had suggested it. If you wanna look pretty for me. And you did. When you heard an engine outside, you waited until his text came through — a simple I'm here — and only then you let yourself rush out.
He was leaning against a black GT3, all in black again, his pale frame almost ghostly under the night. His eyes traveled over you the moment you stepped closer, indiscreet as anything, and it sent a shiver down your spine and heat pooling low in your belly. No smile until you were close enough, then his lips curved into something composed but warm.
"Wow, I should've made more of an effort," he said, and it drew an easy smile from you. "You look amazing."
"Thank you. You look great too." He did. Almost breathtaking, if you let yourself stare too long.
He only smiled, then opened the car door. "Shall we?"
⛍
The drive was quiet for the most part. As the city lights blurred past, you tried not to look his way, but every so often your gaze drifted to his frame beside you — relaxed, unhurried, eyes on the road.
"Traffic's been getting worse, have you noticed?" he said, stopping at a sign.
Traffic talk. Were you really that boring? You thought, at first.
"I wouldn't know, haven't been driving," you said, eyes on the window, the flood of headlights and engine sounds merging into something of their own. "Last time I was behind the wheel, some madman came out of nowhere and hit me."
"Oh yeah?" You heard the amusement in his voice and glanced over. "Streets are getting dangerous. You should be careful, ma'am."
One last look before he pulled through the green light. That gaze. It got to you so easily. You watched his hand settle on the wheel and thought of the photo you'd touched yourself to — you had to look away.
"No, but look at it," he said, voice dropping into something more serious. "Something's different. It all seems like a single thing, like the cars are moving on a purpose." You kept your eyes on the window, and somehow his words made sense — you'd been hyper-aware of it all week. "Maybe I'm just tripping."
"I kinda get it," you said, watching cars and motorcycles blur past, that rush, the stray of red light dissolving into the night. "Like it has a life of its own. I've been paying more attention ever since…"
"Oh." A pause. "I'm sorry."
"No, not like that," you said quickly. "Not in a bad way. It just... catches my attention. It pulls me in."
He hummed. "Are we imagining it?"
He glanced at you briefly, and even after he looked away you kept watching him. "I don't think so. It feels real."
"Yeah. It does."
Then the engine roared — he accelerated onto the avenue, and your heart clenched. If you'd looked at him any longer your panties would've been ruined. You forced your gaze out the window and noticed you'd left the main avenue behind, somewhere past downtown. Old buildings, warehouses, the outskirts near an old railway line. The worn fringe of the city. Curiosity and apprehension settled in you as you watched it pass.
Hollis parked on a quiet, almost deserted street that, surprisingly, had a handful of cars already lined up — most expensive, like his. The space had a strange gravity to it, the kind of stillness that only exists when people are deliberately quiet, like people were holding their breath on purpose. Portable floodlights were staked into the cracked asphalt, casting everything in a pale, clinical glow. You noticed how people moved here — unhurried, almost reverent, the way you'd expect somewhere between a ritual and a wake.
"So I have this friend who organizes all of this," he started, as you fell into step beside him. Ahead, you could make out bleachers and more parked cars.
"And what exactly is this? An illegal race?" you asked, puzzled, glancing at him.
"Nah, it's different. Very different." He looked at you with a playful smile. "It's like theater. With cars."
"How does it work?"
"We act out car crashes," he said simply, and your confusion only deepened. "We take cars similar to those involved in real crashes and reenact them."
"We?" you raised your brows.
"I mean, I don't usually take part in it, but I brought you tonight to watch me." He paused.
You looked ahead, saw two old cars parked across the street, people already seated and waiting. "Just watch?"
"Yeah. I figured it'd make sense." He wasn't looking at you anymore — a man called out to him from across the lot, and they fell into an easy, familiar exchange. The guy was older, and you noticed scars all over his face and what you could see of his arms.
"So that's the girl you almost—?" the man dragged a finger across his throat, and you laughed politely, your head still catching up with everything Hollis had dropped on you.
"Yeah, that's her, y/n" Hollis said, his arm coming around your shoulders and drawing you in.
"Hey," you waved.
"Her first night and she's already taking part in it?" The man looked at Hollis.
"Nah, she's just watching tonight."
Something about it felt thrillingly dangerous. You watched them talk, Hollis still holding you by the shoulder — until his grip shifted lower, to your waist, fingers curling into the fabric of your dress. The awareness hit you all at once.
"So, she—" Hollis' voice pulled you back. He was gesturing toward a girl nearby. "—is going to take you to your seat. I'll see you in a few minutes, alright?"
He turned to face you fully as he said it. You nodded. He briefly brushed your cheek before stepping away.
But after the girl greeted you and began leading you toward the seats, you stopped. Turned on your heels in a quick decision making. Walked back to Hollis in even quicker steps and caught him by the shirt.
"Something wrong?" he asked, brows slightly furrowing.
"Can I go with you?" The words came out breathless. Adrenaline already prickling at your fingertips.
He frowned first, then wet his lips — processing it. He held your gaze for long enough that you almost regretted asking.
"We're literally going to drive one car into another. You know that?"
You nodded. "It just makes sense, doesn't it?"
A slow smile broke across his face. He looked away, then back at you.
"Come on."
He took your hand and led you to one of the parked cars — a vintage Porsche beside an old Ford you couldn't quite name, though Hollis answered before you could ask as you climbed in.
"It's a '55 Porsche 550," he said.
"Oh…" You looked at the dashboard — new and old at once, like stepping through time. "It's actually beautiful."
"Sure is." He had one hand on the wheel, but his body was turned toward you. "Shame we're about to wreck it."
You pouted. How could listening to him talk about destroying a car feel like that? You didn't understand it, but it moved through you like heat.
"What crash are we reenacting?" you asked, trying to cool the wave rising in you.
"James Dean."
Then you heard his friend's voice outside, addressing the crowd. He walked them through Dean's fatal crash with a storyteller's timing, making it a spectacle of its own. Dean had been on his way to a race, driving his Porsche down Route 466 — now SR 46 — when he didn't see a Ford ahead making a turn. He couldn't stop in time. He struck it on the passenger side. The story reminded you of your own crash, and you glanced at Hollis, but he wasn't watching the narrator. He was already watching you.
In Dean's case, despite being the one who hit the Ford, he took the worst of it. His car left the road. Dean was trapped inside while his passenger was thrown clear. Both died. Dean at the scene, with a broken neck.
"You sure you want to do this?" Hollis' hand came to rest on your thigh, rubbing slow circles. You looked at him.
It was insanity — you barely knew this man, and here you were, choosing this. But your pulse was erratic and something under your skin felt like it was boiling. "I'm sure."
While his friend continued outside, Hollis leaned in, and you barely had time to prepare before he kissed you — urgent and wet, your mouths parting and meeting until your chest was heaving. When he broke away, he held your gaze for a moment, then reached over and buckled your seatbelt. The car was fitted with extra restraints, and Hollis secured every one before reaching into the backseat for a helmet. Under any other circumstances you'd have protested about your hair — but you just watched as he fastened it under your chin.
"There you go," he said, leaning back to buckle himself in.
"Don't you have one?" you asked, gestured to your head, watching him start the engine.
"Don't worry." One last glance. "Just hold on tight."
You already were, fingers gripping the edge of the seat. When the car launched forward, your heart nearly left your chest. Everything happened so fast — the speed pressing you back into the seat, the world outside dissolving into a smear of color and light — and then the headlights ahead, closing in, and in a split second: impact.
Your body lurched forward and snapped back in an instant, violently. The sound was enormous: crushed glass, a thunderous collision of metal, tires screaming, then voices outside. You kept your eyes shut through it all, feeling the soreness bloom through you as everything stilled.
"Fuck," you heard Hollis moan, and only then did you open your eyes.
He hadn't moved. His hair was across his face, and you ached everywhere — but you unhooked yourself from the belts and leaned toward him. You pushed the hair from his face and found a cut above his brow, and then a smirk. He opened his eyes and looked at you.
"Oh my god," you breathed. "That was…"
"Wild," he said. "You okay?"
You barely had time to answer before his friend's voice carried over the crowd, presenting Hollis by name. He stepped out of the car — stumbling slightly, but grinning — and you heard him describe every injury Dean had sustained and how Hollis had minimized them in the reenactment. Then he opened your door, took your hand to help you out, and walked the crowd through the mechanical damage from the original crash. You stood beside him, shy under all those eyes, your body still feverish. Something had settled over the lot in the aftermath, people murmuring quietly, the floodlights humming overhead — and you understood then why it felt like a ritual. They weren't here for spectacle. It was something else.
His friend was still speaking when the lights appeared at the far end of the street — blue and red, sweeping long arcs across the warehouse walls. For a half second the crowd didn't move. Then someone said something low and urgent, and people started scattering toward their cars, the bleachers emptying fast, voices cutting through the dark.
Hollis had your wrist before you could process it.
"Come on."
Not running, but close. He moved fast and certain through the dispersing crowd, pulling you with him, until you reached the GT3 at the far end of the lot. He had the doors unlocked before you got there.
"Get in."
You did. The door hadn't fully closed before he had the engine running.
He pulled out slowly, calm — easing through the alley running behind the lot while the blue lights swept the street ahead. You watched through the windshield, breath held, as a patrol car rolled past the alley mouth without stopping. Hollis didn't react. Didn't tense, didn't accelerate. Just watched the mirror until it was gone.
Then a small smile.
"You good?" he asked.
"I don't know," you said honestly.
He laughed quietly at that, and turned out of the alley in the opposite direction, threading back through the worn streets at the city's edge. You let your head fall back against the seat and stared at the ceiling, heart still hammering. The feeling sitting in your chest wasn't fear. It was something that wore fear's shape but felt entirely different from the inside.
"Is it illegal?" you asked, not looking at him.
"Not really, but it threatens public safety or some shit like that and the traffic department often shows up." he chuckled.
"Oh, so it's not even... real police." you laughed, relieved, and he laughed back.
Ahead, the city opened up — the main avenue, wide and nearly empty at this hour — and Hollis let the car breathe. Gradually at first, then all at once. You felt the speed build in your chest before you registered it, that cold hollow sensation low in your belly as the engine surged and the streetlights turned to lines past you. What started as a sharp inhale dissolved into laughter, both of you, as he pushed harder — running lights, taking the sweeping curves of the avenue like they were built for it. By the time you registered you'd left the city center entirely, you were on the highway, and there he opened it up completely. Straight and dark and endless ahead.
He had one hand on the wheel when you felt the other land on your thigh, trailing upward, his long fingers pressing between your legs. He began rubbing you slowly — barely anything, just enough to make your hips shift toward him. He was still driving fast, not even looking at you, but touching you exactly the way you'd been silently asking for all night. You exhaled softly, already drenched, and then he eased off the accelerator and pulled to the side of the road.
Hollis stepped out, and you watched, puzzled, as he came around to your door. He opened it, unclipped your belt, and turned you toward him in one clean motion. He lifted your dress and hooked his fingers into your tights and underwear, pulling them both down in one go. The night air made you shiver — but before you could speak, he was already lowering himself between your legs.
He didn't rush it. He kissed your inner thighs, bit into the skin, trailed upward toward your center without giving you what you needed. He pressed his nose against you, then placed a slow kiss just above your pussy.
"Please," you whispered, and caught the glint of a grin before he looked up at you.
The first stroke of his tongue undid you completely. Warm and deliberate, circling, then his mouth closing over your clit with a hunger that made it seem like he'd been waiting just as long as you had. Your hands flew to his hair and pulled him closer, hips pressing silently forward, begging for more.
Even with the night breeze keeping you acutely aware you were outside, you didn't care. You called for him in whimpers, your whole body twitching with how good he felt. Then he brought two fingers to your entrance and began working them inside you. At some point he stilled — buried deep — and curled them, finding exactly the right spot, making your eyes roll back. Wet sounds blended with your voice as you dripped for him, more and more.
"Fuck—" you squeezed your eyes shut when your orgasm hit. Toes curling, legs shaking, back arching, and still he kept going, kept going until you couldn't hold a single thought together.
Your breath was thin and unraveling when you felt him pulling you closer. "I need you so fucking bad."
He stood up again and it barely took a moment before you saw him pulling his pants down, his cock out, right in front of your face. You didn't hesitate — took him in your hand, eyes locked on his, and as your mouth reached his tip you pressed your lips against it slowly, deliberately, like a big kiss, and watched his mouth fall open.
"Quit the teasing," he said, his hand coming to rest on top of your head. That low voice drew a smile out of you.
With your tongue out, you licked him from tip to base, then back up again. Feeling him made you nearly whimper — his taste, his skin, each vein pulsing under your tongue. You couldn't bear to tease any longer either. You took him into your mouth — as much as fit — and began to move, sucking him, your tongue working along his length.
"That's it," he said, fingers loosely threading through your hair, not forceful, just following your pace.
He groaned and moaned low, and that alone was enough to turn you on again despite your already overheated body. You pulled back, releasing him with a soft sound, and looked up at him with pleading eyes, your hand still working his length.
"Fuck me," you mouthed, your cheeks warm with it, but it was exactly what you needed. "Please."
"Since you're asking so nicely, pretty girl." He cupped your face, holding you in a way that made you feel almost sheltered under his large hand. "Come here."
He helped you out of the car, onto your feet, and guided you to the hood — gentle but certain. "Bend over."
You didn't question it. You turned your back to him and bent forward over the car. Parts of the metal were cool from the night air, but the hood was warm from the engine that had been running hard only minutes ago. You spread your hands across the surface, widened your stance, and arched your back for him.
"That's good."
His palm settled on your lower back. Then his cock pressed against you, grinding slowly — moving down between you until he reached your entrance, dragging through your folds. You were so wet he slipped easily along you, parting you, teasing. You bit your lip with anticipation, and when he finally pushed inside — the full length of him — you gasped. You remembered how big he was, how he felt stretching you open, but somehow it was even better than you'd held in your memory. He started pounding you immediately — hard, no buildup, just his hips slamming against you over and over. The only thing holding you in place were his hands grabbing you by your hips.
Your mind filled with images from earlier: being in that car with him, the roar of the engine, the crash reenactment, all of it weaving into what was happening now. Your legs were failing as he drove into you, buried so deep you cried out.
"You want someone to pull over to watch you?" You heard him laugh, then he leaned over you. His hand came to your face, fingers holding your chin, turning you to look back at him. "Can't stop thinking, can you?"
You shook your head, pressing your lips together to hold back your moan — but he silenced you with a kiss instead, sloppy and urgent, barely fitting together but desperate to be closer. When he pulled back his hand came over your mouth.
"I'll make you stop thinking."
He went harder, your sounds muffled beneath his palm, his body close over yours so you could hear every breath, every low groan, every word he said against your skin — the kind of words that would have made your face burn in any other moment, but right now only made your mind go blank.
You came right there, clenching around him, eyes rolling back, teeth grazing his hand — which made him laugh, low and breathless. While you were still shaking he pulled out, turned you around, and lifted you onto the hood. He had to lower his hips to line up with you, but the moment he pushed back inside he was moving with the same urgency, the same roughness — this time facing you, one hand fisted in your hair, the other anchoring your hips so you stayed exactly where he wanted you.
"Hollis," you moaned, your mouth brushing his with how close he was. Your eyes were wet with it, overwhelmed completely.
When he was close he went faster, kissed you again — mouth crashing into yours with no delicacy at all, just need — and you heard him moan against your lips. He pulled out at the last moment, spilling hot across your thigh with a long, dragged groan.
You held his face in your hands, quiet, both of you catching your breath. For a full minute he stayed there with you in the dark of the roadside, his face dropping to rest against your shoulder, both your chests heaving in unison.
Neither of you said anything after that. You got back in the car, cleaned up as best you could with tissues from the glove box, and settled into a silence that felt different from earlier — heavier. As he made the turn back toward the city you found yourself replaying his eyes more than anything else. And then it came back to you quietly, the way it always did — he had a girlfriend at home. Did she know about this side of him? Did she know where he was tonight?
⛍
"Thank you for tonight," you said, as he pulled up in front of your building. He didn't unlock the doors yet.
"Think I should be thanking you for the company," he said, a small, contained smile.
"I never thought I'd be doing any of that," you said, laughing softly as the images came back. "Honestly, I haven't thought I'd be doing a lot of things lately."
"That's a good sign," he said, looking at you.
Silence. The doors still locked.
"Take care," He paused. "Now that you have my number, you can text me. Just don't call, I'm usually busy."
"Oh." The weight of that settled on you. "Sure. I will... I won't. I mean, I won't call."
He chuckled. "Hope to see you again."
He reached for your face, his thumb tracing a slow, soft line across your cheek.
"Yeah. Me too, Hollis." Only then did he unlock the doors. You held his gaze a moment longer before stepping out.
You fought the urge to look back as you climbed the stairs. He was still there — you could feel it. Only once you stepped inside did you hear the engine turn over and fade down the street.
Euphoric wasn't quite the word. Too many things filled your body at once, and as you stood under the shower feeling the ache settle into your skin you weren't sure how much of it was the reenactment and how much was the way he'd had you against the hood of his car — both felt incredibly, unreasonably good.
That night, curled in bed and turning it all over in your mind, you found yourself on his instagram again. With a small strike of courage, you hit follow.
A few minutes later, a notification.
2cross22 followed you back.
You smiled at that, and curled into sleep feeling lighter than you had in weeks.
thinking about how i have two fanfics that involves hollis and cars which is so fucking funny considering that man's a fucking disaster behind the wheel irl
wait pls make a priest!hollis fic unless you think it’s like weird (I used to be catholic and the Catholic Church has done some weird shit so I think it’s okay) 🤤🤤🤤
i DO NOT think it's weird at all, love me some good christian guilt, + desecration hilda hurricane type shit (also grew up catholic, been there, done that) you actually gave me an idea right there tyy
okay so my finger is genuinely getting a dent from holding my phone since all I’ve been doing is re reading Crash pls pls pls make a pt 2 to crash I swear I’ve read it 5x this week
OMG you won’t believe me when i say i actually revisited crash just a few days ago and was genuinely wondering why i hadn’t written anything else for it, because i had so much fun writing it (it was probably because i was too hyped with sister) but it's honestly one of my faves ive written yet
i already have some things written, i just need to shape them and all but THANK YOU for this, cause it’s the little push i needed to get back to it!!
i’ll find some time this week to rewatch crash (the movie) so i can get my inspiration going again. i’ll try to drop part 2 by the end of the week, pinky promise!!!🫶
faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy
a stranger along the way forces you both into decisions you can’t turn back from.
tags: 2hollisxfem!reader, suspense, roadtrip, smut (p in v)
⚠️cw: graphic depiction of violence, mentions of death, gun violence, potentially distressing material, implied predatory behavior(nothing happens, the guy's just very creepy, but i think it's worth the warning)
a/n: this chapter works as a turning point for the two of them and it deals with slightly darker themes, please read the content warning and tags, if you're not comfortable with any of that, DO NOT READ IT!!!<3
It's not that you got used to the idea of robbing or harming someone, but eventually it started to make sense. And sometimes, some people had it coming. Like the old man who offered help when Hollis's car died.
You were in the middle of nowhere, somewhere along the interstate in between Colorado and Utah. The nearest light you'd seen had been a gas station sign about forty minutes back, and before that, nothing — just the highway cutting through dark flatland, the kind of empty that makes you aware of how small you are. You'd been sleeping until you heard Hollis cursing and felt the car slowly pulling to a stop.
You woke to Hollis stepping out and lifting the hood to check the engine. You stepped out after him.
"Get back to the car," he said.
"No," you answered simply, and he sighed. You reached his side, looking down at the engine as if you understood any of it. "What's wrong?"
"It's probably the water — it overheated." You nodded, still with no clue. "I didn't check back in the last city."
"And what are we gonna do?" You raised your eyes to him.
"I don't know," He looked back at you with a tired stare — he'd been driving the whole night. "I'm calling a tow truck."
Half an hour went by with Hollis trying to get through to a tow truck. You honestly didn't even know how far you were from the nearest town, but judging by the landscape — stretches of grass and the odd solitary property sitting dark and still in the distance — you figured it was far. It was also the first time in quite a while that you'd seen Hollis using his phone; most of the time it stayed off, and he made you keep yours off too.
"Fuck," he roared at the screen, about to dial again when you stepped closer.
"We can sleep in the car tonight and look for help tomorrow." You reached for his face, both hands cupping it gently, fingers brushing his cheekbones. His gaze softened as soon as he met your eyes, and he smiled — softly.
"Sounds good," he said, and you smiled back.
He left the backseat for you. You didn't want to sleep in comfort without him, but he insisted he was too big for the backseat anyway — though truthfully, he was too big for the front seat too. Even reclining back, he had to curl into his own frame just to lay properly.
You watched him from the back, his cap pulled low, arms folded across his chest in the pale moonlight, while you searched for your own sleep. It never came. You listened to an owl somewhere far off, the wind shaking the tall grass and bending the trees, the occasional car passing down the road — none of it pulled you under. You were already resigning yourself to staying awake the whole night when the knocks came.
You heard them before you fully understood what they were. Three slow knocks, evenly spaced, like someone who'd been standing there a while before deciding to announce themselves. It immediately startled you but Hollis didn't so much as stir. You looked out the window before waking him.
The man was standing too close to the car. Not the polite distance of someone passing by who'd noticed trouble — he was right up against the glass, and he'd positioned himself so that the shadows fell across most of his face. Middle-aged, greasy, and odd-looking, to say the least. Something about the stillness of him, the way he wasn't shifting his weight or looking around the way a normal person would, sat wrong in your stomach even before he smiled.
"Holli," you called, poking him through the gap in the seats.
It took a moment, but Hollis woke. He looked for you first, then for the man knocking at his window. He reached into the glove box for his gun and kept it hidden at his hip. Only then did he lower the window — about a quarter of the way, just enough for the man to hear him.
"Can I help you?" he asked.
"Good night, son," the man said, a strange smile revealing rotten teeth. "Something wrong with the car?"
"Yeah — it just died, but I'm calling a tow truck first thing in the morning," Hollis answered, dry and suspicious.
"I see." The man looked a moment longer, then somehow found you in the backseat, past Hollis. Hollis frowned and shifted his body to block you from the man's line of sight. "My house isn't far from here. It's not safe to sleep out in the middle of nowhere."
"That's real nice of you, but we're fine," Hollis said quickly.
"I'm saying it on account of the lady — people from all over pass this road. It really isn't far, my house. And come morning I can tow your car with my own truck."
The proposal wasn't bad, and maybe you were only judging by appearances. You knew Hollis would refuse — out of pride, out of caution — but you reached for his shoulder and touched it lightly, just enough to suggest what you had in mind.
"Give us a sec," he said before closing the window in the man's face. "You're not actually thinking of saying yes, are you?"
"It's just for the night, and he said he'd help with the car," you whispered.
"He's weird," Hollis said plainly — and he was right.
"It's just that we don't even know if there's a tow service anywhere nearby." You pouted, and Hollis held your gaze for a moment. You knew that look — he was weighing it, and you were tipping the scale just by staring back.
"Fine," he said, and you kissed his cheek quickly.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀
The stranger's truck smelled like an old house and something dairy you couldn't quite name. It was a three-seat cabin, and Hollis positioned himself in the middle, between you and the man — when you'd moved to climb in first, he'd caught you by the waist and put you by the window instead.
You were nearly asleep again before long, head resting on Hollis's shoulder while the stranger talked at him. You paid no attention to the conversation, only to Hollis's hand resting on your leg and yours settled over his.
Until you heard it.
"Is she your sister? Or girlfriend? No offense," the man said.
"My wife," Hollis said, and you pressed back the smile, squeezing his hand instead.
"Wife? Aren't you a little young for that?"
"Not really — we met in college a few years back and married as soon as we graduated." He was flat-out lying, just for the fun of it.
"And where are you headed?"
"Arizona. Small town called Bisbee — visiting her family." You had to fight not to laugh.
"City folk meets a small-town girl and ties the knot quick — I can see why, honestly." The man laughed. Hollis didn't.
"She's a good girl." His hand tightened around your leg — possessive and protective in equal measure.
The man went quiet for a moment, eyes back on the road, and then almost to himself: "Yeah, the good ones you gotta hold onto. Things have a way of — disappearing, if you're not careful."
Something about the way he said it made you open your eyes. But his expression in the rearview was unreadable, and Hollis's thumb had started moving slow circles on your knee, and you told yourself it was nothing.
The house wasn't far, no more than a twenty-minute drive down a side road — a wooden house, nothing unusual for the region. But it was surprisingly cozy and neat inside. The man showed you to the guest room, and you felt the tension leave your shoulders the moment the door closed. There was a key in the lock. Hollis turned it.
"See? We're fine," you said, watching him shrug off his jacket. When his shirt lifted at the hem, you caught the gun still holstered at his hip.
"We're really not — that guy's weird." He sounded genuinely irritated. He lay down, and you followed.
"He's gonna help us and we'll be out of here first thing in the morning." You crawled toward him. "You sleeping with that?"
You poked at the holster, meeting his eyes. He reached for the gun, lifted it, turned it over in his hand. You couldn't deny what the sight did to you — you felt it everywhere, across your skin, down your spine, and unmistakably elsewhere. When he set it on the nightstand you moved over him, one knee on either side of his hips.
"Am I your wife?" you asked, and he grinned.
"Yeah, my beautiful wife." His hand found your nape, then slid into your hair, gripping it to pull you closer.
"Just for tonight, though," you said, a pout on your lips.
"We’ll see about that" His gaze dropped to your mouth and you bit your lower lip as the grip in your hair tightened. You liked when he was rougher. You liked when he handled you like that.
He kissed you with that same roughness — relentless, his lips fitting yours with ease, his tongue taking over in a way that had you surrendered to him completely. You rested your hands on his chest, then slid them down to his abdomen, fingers grazing lightly across it.
It took no time before you were moving on top of him, grinding on his lap. The mere friction of your panties against his jeans had you whimpering against his mouth.
"Hey," he said, seriously. His other hand came to your hip, trying to steady you, but you kept moving, rolling your hips back and forth. "We can't fuck here."
"Why not?" Your voice came out frail, almost pleading.
You dug your nails into his skin as you kept moving on top of him, your pussy twitching, getting soaked by the minute.
"Fuck it," he said, his voice coming out hoarse, and you smiled at your small victory.
Hollis's grip slid up your thigh until it reached your ass, helping you move, pressing you down over his crotch. You bit your lip to keep from moaning when you felt his growing length beneath you. It felt so good against your cunt that your whole body burned with it. But it wasn't enough. Your hands rushed to unbutton his jeans and drag the zipper down. You raised your hips just enough to push his pants out of the way.
"So fucking greedy," he said, and you glanced up at him briefly. He wore that same devilish look you'd first noticed when you met him — the one you'd grown so fond of — and it made your heart skip and your cheeks flush all at once.
You went on, pulling down his underwear until his cock was finally within reach. You wrapped your hand around the base and began to stroke him slowly. You bent forward just enough to spit on his tip, wetting him so it was easier to work him with both hands. You loved how he throbbed under your touch, loved the sound of his sharp breaths, the way his chest rose and fell, the way his gaze gleamed down at you. You loved it so much.
As he watched you, you stopped and raised your hips. First you slipped out of your summer dress, then your panties, until you were completely naked in front of him. It still made your cheeks warm, mostly when he looked at you with that much attention, his heavy-lidded eyes moving over every detail of you. When you lowered yourself onto him again, you took hold of his cock once more, this time to line him up at your entrance. You said nothing, just bit into your lip to stay quiet as you sank down on top of him, his cock filling you inch by inch. It still caught you off guard — how good it felt to have him stretching you open like that.
You struggled to find your rhythm, but Hollis made it easier by taking hold of your hips and guiding you into it. Slow at first, then the two of you settled into a pace that made staying quiet feel like torture. Desperately, he grabbed you by the neck and pulled you close, kissing you so hard it drew a whimper out of you.
If you'd struggled to hold back when you were leading, the moment Hollis began thrusting up into you, you had no choice but to bury your face against his neck to muffle the sounds escaping your mouth. He wasn't faring much better — between the heaviness of his breathing and the low, hoarse sounds he made from time to time, it was clear how much it was getting to him too. His hands gripped your hips and waist so tight it ached, fingers digging into your skin without restraint, his body slamming up into yours again and again.
When the first spasm tore through you, you bit down on his shoulder — not caring whether it hurt him, just needing to keep your mouth shut somehow. Even so, you cried out and clenched tight around him. It drew a moan from Hollis, but he kept thrusting, relentless. He grew faster, his movements turning sloppy, and you knew. He tried to lift you off him, but you leaned back and sat up straight on top of him, rolling your hips as you held his gaze.
"Baby, I'm gonna—" he said, his voice wrecked, fighting his edge.
"I know," you said, low.
And you kept moving anyway — faster, grinding down on him as you felt him throbbing inside you. You pressed both hands to his chest for leverage and rode him properly.
Hollis fell back against the pillow, lips parted, hands gripping you tight, and you rode him until you felt the first of him spill inside you — just a moment, just enough to make you gasp — before he grabbed your hips and lifted you off him, finishing across your stomach with a rough, wrecked sound. The warmth of it spread across your skin and you stayed still, catching your breath, watching his chest heave.
"You're insane," he said finally, spent.
"I'm not." You leaned down and rested your head on his shoulder. Both of you panting and slick with sweat. "It just felt so good."
He hummed and pulled you close. His kiss pressed to the top of your head was the last thing you felt before sleep pulled you under, still wrapped in his arms.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀
The next morning, Hollis woke you early. You were a light sleeper, so you got up without much trouble.
"Get dressed," he said.
You nodded and did as he said, moving slowly and groggy. You cleaned yourself up, put on your dress, fixed your hair as best you could, then just waited for him.
The two of you went downstairs, his hand in yours the whole way. The man was in his living room, watering plants or something like it. He greeted you both with a wide smile, his eyes sliding over you in a way that turned your stomach, and you shifted slightly closer to Hollis.
That morning he went with Hollis to tow the car. You stayed behind and looked around — scattered the whole place, really.
You started with the basement. The staircase creaked under every step and the smell hit you before you reached the bottom — something damp and organic, like soil and something older beneath it. The space was crammed: old furniture stacked against the walls, a workbench covered in taxidermy tools and unlabeled chemicals, the kind of setup that would have made sense for a hunter if it hadn't felt so deliberate. The stuffed animals were everywhere — squirrels, rabbits, a fox with glass eyes that caught the light wrong. Along the far wall, lined up with a neatness that contrasted with everything else in the room, were women's shoes. All different styles, different sizes. You counted twelve pairs before you stopped counting. Your breathing had gone shallow without you noticing, and you stood there for a moment just listening to the silence above you before you made yourself keep moving. Beside the shoes, a wardrobe. You pulled it open and found women's clothes — a lot of them, folded or hung with care, different sizes too, as if collected over time rather than belonging to any one person. You closed it carefully, like you hadn't been there at all.
On your way back up you noticed the rocking chair positioned directly beneath the single hanging bulb — its armrests worn completely smooth, almost polished, like something had spent a long time sitting there. You didn't linger.
The living room and kitchen were just as neat and unremarkable as the night before, which almost made it worse — the contrast. You moved quickly through them, opening drawers without finding much, until you pulled open the one beside the kitchen sink. You hesitated before you looked inside, some part of you already sensing you wouldn't like what you found. A stack of Polaroids rubber-banded together. Candid shots. Women at gas stations, women walking through parking lots, one taken through what was clearly a window. None of them looking at the camera. None of them knowing. You put them back exactly as you found them and shut the drawer, and then you stood very still for a moment with your hand still resting on it, staring at nothing.
Upstairs, past the guest room, his bedroom sat at the end of the corridor. You pushed the door open slowly and the smell reached you before anything else — stale sweat and something sweet beneath it, something wrong. You breathed through your mouth and stepped in.
The walls were dense with photographs — family portraits, him alongside a woman, two children, a dog. Ordinary enough on the surface, except the woman looked hollow in almost every one of them. Not sad exactly. Hollow. Like something behind her eyes had quietly gone out. You told yourself you were projecting.
There was a vanity table against one wall that stopped you cold. Women's perfume bottles arranged in a careful row, a hairbrush with long dark hair still wound through the bristles. Unmistakably a woman's things — but nothing else in the room suggested a woman had ever lived here. You picked up one of the bottles without meaning to, turned it over in your hand, set it back down.
Beside the bed, a stack of letters tied with twine. All from the same return address, all in the same handwriting — a woman's. All unopened. The most recent postmark was only a few months old. You thought about the clothes downstairs. The shoes lined up too neatly. You thought about what he'd said in the truck — the good ones you gotta hold onto, things have a way of disappearing — and your mouth went dry.
You crouched and looked under the bed. The corner of a suitcase was just visible, fitted with a heavy padlock. You were working out how to get it open, fingers already reaching for it, when you heard the engine outside.
You ran.
You heard the truck before you saw it. You were at the front door before it had even fully stopped, and the moment Hollis stepped out you crossed the porch and walked straight into him, arms wrapping tight around him, face pressed to his chest. He said nothing — just closed his arms around you and brought one hand up to your hair, fingers moving through it slowly.
You wanted to tell him. The shoes lined up along the wall. The Polaroids in the kitchen drawer. The vanity with someone else's hairbrush. The letters, all unopened. The suitcase. The words sat right at the back of your throat — and then the man was already stepping onto the porch behind Hollis, wiping his hands on a rag, filling the silence before you had the chance.
"Got her hooked up no problem, I figure it's an easy fix, few hours at most, maybe less. Just gonna call the mechanic, he’ll be here in no time" he said, moving past you both toward the door. "You two hungry? I can make something before you head out."
"Sure," Hollis said, and you felt the word vibrate in his chest against your cheek. His fingers hadn't stopped moving through your hair.
You tilted your head just enough to look up at him. He was watching the man's back, expression neutral, but his eyes cut down to yours for just a second — brief and quiet, reading you — or trying to. You gave him nothing back. You couldn't, not yet. So you pressed closer and he let you, his arm tightening slightly at your waist.
"I remember being your age," the man said, you did not turn to look at him. "Right about your age when I met my wife."
"Is that so?" Hollis said, his tone easy, unbothered.
"Yeah. Course she was younger than your lady." You felt your jaw tighten against Hollis's chest. His fingers grazed your scalp, unhurried, and the steadiness of it kept you still. "Different time. You get me?"
"Sure," Hollis said.
"Enjoy it while it lasts is all I'm saying." He laughed — wet and nasal, an awful sound. "Soon she won't be this clingy. Won't even look at your face. I'll tell you that much."
Hollis's hand paused for just a fraction of a second in your hair. So small you almost missed it.
"My Nancy?" He used a random name as a disguise, you figured. "Doubt it. She's just soft like that."
"They're all like that at first, all over you, then running like the plague." His tone had shifted, the lightness gone from it entirely. "But what do I know? Maybe you two are the lovebird type."
You thought about the shoes. The one detail that kept coming back, quiet and insistent — twelve pairs, all different sizes, lined up like they were waiting for someone to come back for them. You pressed your face a little further into Hollis's chest and said nothing.
Hollis only hummed in response, and the air between them thickened. He kept brushing your hair back with his fingers, slow and deliberate, and you understood that he knew something was wrong — you could feel it in the way he held you, slightly closer than usual, slightly more careful — but he didn't push. He just stayed there with you, solid and warm, while the man kept talking like the silence was something that needed filling.
Tankfully, the man excused himself, said he was making breakfast, and when it was ready he called you both in. You looked to Hollis for some kind of out — you didn't even want to touch the man's food — but you sat down at the table anyway and pretended to be occupied with your plate while he talked without pause. Until knocks came at the door.
"Must be the guy," he said, pushing back his chair. "Come on."
He waved at Hollis, who stood. You moved to follow when he stopped you. "Finish eating — we'll be back soon."
So you stayed. The two of them disappeared through the door and you sat there, poking at your food, glancing around the room. You were genuinely starving, but you couldn't bring yourself to eat the scrambled eggs. You wondered if you were being unfair — maybe he was just a sad, strange loner and not the villain of some horror film. You felt a little mean for thinking it. Then you thought about the Polaroids and stopped feeling mean.
"Aren't you hungry?"
You looked up. The man was standing in the kitchen doorway.
"Woke up feeling a bit off, actually — no offense," you said, keeping your voice low and polite.
"None taken." He smiled. You hated that smile. "I think this is the first time I've actually heard you speak. That man of yours talks for you every time."
"Does he?" You laughed nervously. "I'm just shy. He knows me well."
"Yeah? He ain't the controlling type, is he? Not keeping you hostage or anything?" He burst out laughing at his own joke. It wasn't funny, and the laugh was repulsive — that same wet, nasal sound. You forced a smile so as not to be rude. You didn't feel like you had the upper hand here.
"No, he's very sweet, actually," you said.
"I'm sure he is. But with a girl like you, you can never be too careful — you know what I mean?" He was still smiling, still staring in that way that made everything in you recoil.
"I don't, actually," you said, and rose to your feet.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He waved a hand. "Just playing around."
Even so, you stayed standing, your eyes flicking to the doorway behind him. If you wanted to leave, you'd have to walk past him.
"Where's my husband?" you asked. "I'm really not feeling well."
"He's outside with the guy checking the car." He leaned against the doorframe. "No need to worry — I'll keep you company."
Your gaze moved restlessly around the room, your mind already mapping exits, weighing options. The back door through the kitchen. The window above the sink. How fast you could get past him if you ran.
"Relax — the man's not gonna leave you here." He stepped forward, and your stomach turned over. "He ain't that dumb."
He kept coming toward you and you stepped back behind the table, keeping something between the two of you. You thought about the knife in your boot, still out in the car. You thought about how the table would only hold him off so long.
"Playing all shy now, but I heard you last night." That smile didn't move. "Bit of a freak, aren't you?"
Your eyes went wide. He kept closing the distance and you had already made the decision — the window, you'd go through the window if you had to — when a sound split through the room.
A gunshot.
A fraction of a second, and the man was on the floor, clutching his leg. You looked to the doorway. Hollis was standing there, gun in hand.
No thought crossed your mind except to run to him — and you did. But just as you neared the door, something locked around your ankle.
"You little slut!" The man groaned from the floor, one hand soaked red, now smearing blood up your leg as he grabbed higher — your thigh.
You yanked against his grip and screamed. You were twisting toward Hollis when the second shot came. This time you didn't look down. You kept your eyes on Hollis, your whole body locking up, and then you felt the grip on your thigh go slack and fall away. You weren't just startled — you were stunned, shaking, and just when you thought you couldn't move, Hollis's arms came around you. He pulled you into his chest.
"I got you. You're okay," he whispered. "Let's get out of here."
Too dazed to speak, you followed him, but at the front door you stopped. "Upstairs, under his bed, there's a suitcase with a lock on it. We could... check it."
Hollis looked at you and smiled. A proud smile. He rubbed your chin with his thumb. "Good girl."
You stood rooted at the door while he took the stairs two at a time. He was back in moments, the suitcase in hand, the lock broken open. Neither of you said anything when you saw what was inside — a bundle of women's driver's licenses held together with a rubber band, different names, different states, different faces. Beneath them, a thick fold of cash. A lock of dark hair sealed in a plastic bag. You felt your throat close. You didn't cry, didn't speak — your hand just found Hollis's arm and held it, and he let you. He took the money and left the rest. Neither of you looked inside again. You got back on the road, out of there.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀
Shock wasn't even the right word for what you were. Mostly you were scared — and not for the right reasons. Every time you glanced at Hollis beside you, all you felt was dread on his behalf. A man could be dead, and all you could think about was the trouble he'd just walked into — because of you. It was all pressing in too hard, your head buzzing, the sharp smell of blood rising from your stained dress and leg, and if you'd eaten anything earlier you probably would have been sick.
"I need a shower," you said, out of nowhere. The first words you'd spoken in over an hour.
"We're almost at the next city, baby. Hang in there," Hollis said. Calm as anything. How was he so calm?
When you finally pulled into a motel your whole body loosened with relief at the thought of washing it all off. The blood, at least. Your dress was another matter — it had set too long; the stain wasn't going anywhere.
You found Hollis on the edge of the bed doing something with his gun when you came back into the room. You were toweling your hair dry, wearing nothing but one of his shirts — you always liked sleeping in them.
"What are you doing?" you asked.
"Just checking," he said, glancing up at you with an obvious look that had nothing to do with the gun. "You okay?"
"Are you okay?" you asked back.
"Me? I'm fine." He shrugged.
"How are you so calm?" You crossed the room toward him. "You just — that man could be dead."
"Probably," he said, just as plainly. "He had it coming though."
You thought about the driver's licenses. All those faces, all those names and the unopened letters and you thought — yes, he did. You knew that. And still something about the easiness of it, the way Hollis said it the same way he'd say anything, made the ground feel slightly unsteady beneath you.
"Hollis, what if—" Your voice cut out. Your throat felt dry. "What if someone comes after you?"
"I don't think anyone's going to notice that man missing anytime soon." He almost sounded amused, setting the gun aside. "He was a complete loner; told me himself when we went to get the car. No family, no kids, no friends to speak of. The mechanic said nobody in town really talked to him. They only knew him because he came in for groceries."
He said it with something close to amusement, like it was almost funny, while you'd spent the last two hours feeling like your insides had been rearranged. You exhaled slowly and stepped closer. His hands came up to meet you — your thighs, your hips, your waist. You looked down at him where he sat on the edge of the bed.
"We're fine," he said, softer now. "You're fine. That's all that matters to me."
You pouted at that and nodded. He pulled you in until you folded into his lap. He held you tight enough that you finally felt the tension begin to leave your body — and you let it, even knowing what you knew, even with the contradiction of it sitting somewhere quiet and unspoken in your chest. The man who was holding you together was the same man who hadn't flinched. You didn't know what to do with that yet. So you just held on.
"I was so scared," you said — and only then did you realize you were crying. "I don't know what would have happened if you hadn't been there."
"But I was there," he said, rubbing slow circles into your back. "And I'm here. No one's going to hurt you while I'm right here."
You held him tighter. In that moment you believed him more than you'd ever believed anything — more than any passage from the Bible your mother had made you memorize as a child. And maybe that should have frightened you too. But it didn't. It just felt like the truest thing you knew.
something about your best friend's boyfriend made you suspicious from the start. one drunk night, when you gathered the courage to confront him about his shitty behavior, you got the confirmation you needed: he couldn't be trusted. and neither could you.
tags: 2hollisxfem!reader, angst, cheating (lk both cheating), pre-established relationship, hate sex, car sex, smut(p in v), oral (female receiving), unreliable narrator
The three of you used to be inseparable since high school — Ally, Cathy, and you. But ever since he entered the picture, it always went like this. Friday night drinks at a bar? Forget it — only if Hollis could come. Movie night, or just getting together to catch up — if she made it at all, she wouldn't stay long, because she had to call Hollis, or because he was coming to town, or whatever excuse came next. And it wasn't because you were the only single one — Cathy also had a boyfriend and still managed to have her own life.
The thing is, sometimes you thought he did it on purpose. But no one could actually know, because ever since Ally introduced him to you, you'd kept something to yourself that last summer, you'd spent weeks hooking up with him — until he ghosted you. You didn't mind. Despite the good sex, you never really got attached to him — or so you told yourself. Of course he was extremely good-looking, handsome in every sense of the word, but he was also impossibly cocky, a little cryptic, and honestly, from the moment you first got with him, you knew he wasn't a keeper.
So it actually surprised you when your friend told you all about how romantic and sweet he was with her — how he bought her flowers and put together a whole surprise just to ask her to be his girlfriend. Properly cute. But that was Ally all right; she was some kind of angelic girl, straight out of a romance novel. She deserved all of that, and you were genuinely happy he was treating her right. At first. But then it began — him stealing all her time, controlling her schedule. She even skipped classes because of him. He had a whole other life, would never stick around, and she made every effort to follow him through it, like a puppy. It got on your nerves.
You were fed up with it. Cathy complained too, but it didn't seem to get under her skin the way it did yours. Maybe you were too protective. And deep down, maybe you just couldn't trust him at all. The guy you'd met — he was still there, and it showed every time Ally came crying to you about his mood shifts, or when he went to parties on his trips without her. It worried you that he might hurt her. She wasn't tough like you; she wouldn't come out of it the way you had.
One random Friday, you invited her to a party — this time you even invited Hollis, since he'd be in town. She said no. He was tired from his flight, and since he was staying home, she'd take the chance to study. You rolled your eyes but let it go. You had Cathy's loyal company for the night, and the two of you headed to the said party at a club downtown — some artist event a friend of a friend had scored tickets to.
It was a really fun one. Drinks after drinks and you were loose, carefree. Later, a guy approached you — a really cute one — and you ended up making out with him in the VIP area. Everything was going well, light and easy, and you were in the middle of a conversation with Cathy, her boyfriend, and a few other people when an unmistakable figure cut through the crowd toward the DJ booth. He was remarkable enough that there was no mistaking him for someone else.
You glanced at Cathy, but she hadn't noticed. She was talking to her boyfriend, laughing, light. You thought about saying something but didn't want to ruin her mood the way it had ruined yours. You excused yourself from the guy at your side and stepped closer. Looking around, there was no sign of Ally — which made you wonder: did she even know he was there? You thought about texting her, but instead you grabbed your phone and took a picture of him. Maybe you'd need proof.
In a split second, his gaze found yours. You thought he'd back off — maybe flinch at the realization that you'd caught him there. But no. Instead, he smiled at you. Shameless. Almost amused. God, it made your blood boil. That was it. Without thinking twice, you walked straight up to him — heavy steps, body rigid. His friends were around, but you didn't care.
"Hey, y/n," he said, friendly, an arm coming around your shoulder in a brief greeting.
"Where's Ally?" you asked immediately.
"Studying, I think. Or some shit like that," he said casually, that easy look still on his face. It pissed you off.
"The fuck are you doing here, then?"
"My friend invited me, so…" He shrugged and sipped his drink.
"Does she know you're here?" You frowned.
"Guess," he chuckled.
Your mouth fell open, stunned by the nerve of him saying that to your face.
"Guess she's finding out, then," you said, turning on your heel to walk away. You'd barely taken a few steps when you felt a hand close around yours. You looked down at his grip, and he quickly released you.
"Hey, come on," he said, not so amused now. "Quit that."
"You quit that!" Your voice rose — thankfully the music was loud enough to swallow it. "You're actually disgusting!"
"Sure," he raised both hands, one still holding a beer bottle. "Can we talk somewhere else?"
"Fuck no!" you snapped, and kept walking, heading straight back toward your friends.
You had a feeling he was following you, and when you glanced back, there he was — a few steps behind, sipping his beer. "I'm not gonna force you to talk to me, but please—"
"Fine," you sighed. You looked back to where Cathy stood, still completely unaware of what you were doing.
You ended up in the alley outside the club, arms folded tight across your chest. Hollis leaned against the wall, lighting a cigarette.
"So why shouldn't I tell Ally?" you said, since he'd stayed quiet long enough.
"Because I wasn't doing anything wrong. I came to a party with some friends. That's all."
"If you're not doing anything wrong, there's no need to hide it from her," you smirked, proud of the reply.
He groaned and dragged a hand down his face. It was so pathetic — he looked like a teenage boy getting scolded.
"She doesn't even like going out! Every time I suggest we go somewhere, she'd rather stay home. I just didn't tell her because I knew she wouldn't want to come!" He came at you with that, voice calm the whole time, speaking slowly the way he always did.
"That's not true… I invited her tonight and she told me YOU were the one who was tired!"
"See?" He widened his eyes. "She didn't even tell me you'd invited us!"
"Her. I invited her." It was a lie — you had invited both of them.
"God, what is wrong with you?" He groaned again, stepping closer. You didn't like that. "Whenever I'm around, you make that…" He gestured vaguely toward your face. "…face."
"What's wrong with my face?" You stepped back.
"Nothing, really. It just makes me feel like a burden," he said, and you almost laughed at that.
"Poor Holli," you pouted in mockery. "Do I make you feel uncomfortable, baby?"
He chuckled, looked around, then looked back at you. "Why you're such a bitch? What is your problem with me, really?"
He stepped forward, and this time you stepped forward too, finger raised and pointed at him. "Wanna know my problem? My problem is you being a shit boyfriend to my best friend, monopolizing all of her time until she barely has a social life, and then sneaking out behind her back to go to some club, you sick fuck!"
"Monopolizing her time? I'm her fucking boyfriend!" He laughed in your face, and it made your skin flush hot with rage. "If she's not around your little group, it's because she'd rather be with me. That's usually how it works when you're in love with someone. Maybe your bitter ass isn't too familiar with the idea."
"My bitter ass? What the fuck do you know about me?!" You lost all composure, outrage written all over your face, ears burning. "And oh my God — how in love you must be to be lying to her behind her back! That is really my dream relationship, Hollis."
"Enough to know you're unbearable to be around," he said, losing his cool as well now — tensed up, jaw clenched, looking down at you. "Yeah, maybe that was your dream relationship. Maybe that's why it bothers you this much."
That was it. You lost it. Your eyes flickered in disbelief, mouth open, words failing you at the sheer absurdity of what he'd just said. You laughed first, then brushed your hair back.
"You think you're that important, huh?" You smirked. He smirked back.
"I don't know, baby — you tell me." You frowned at the audacity of it.
"Fuck, you're just—" And yet, even as the weight of the offense landed, you felt yourself rooted in place, his gaze dropping over you. Then he touched your waist — cautious — and you flinched, and he stopped.
You could blame the alcohol. You could blame the heat of the argument doing something to you. But in the end, you had only yourself to blame. He leaned down, and you leaned forward to meet his lips. It wasn't even slightly soft — he kissed you like he was proving a point, and you kissed him back like you were screaming every accusation you'd kept hidden. His hand gripped your waist and pulled you closer; yours flew to the back of his neck, his chest, everywhere you could hold onto him with the same urgency as your tongues fought each other.
For a moment you broke the kiss, staring at him, and he stared back as though waiting for you to explode. But you didn't. You just kissed him again — harder this time, hard enough to leave your lip swollen later. His hand slid down and grabbed your ass roughly, pulling a sigh out of you against his mouth.
"Where's your car?" you said between kisses, and he pulled back, brows raised. "Shut the fuck up."
He smirked, kissed you once more — briefly — and then guided you down the alley.
⚜
His G-Wagon had enough space to lay you down across the back seat, enough space for him to fit his face between your legs. His large hands pulled down your dress and groped your breasts while he ate you out — tongue circling your clit, then sucking on it in a way that made your back arch off the seat.
"You fucker," you cursed, reaching to pull off the beanie he was wearing just so you could grab his hair.
Soon you were rolling your hips against his mouth, desperately whimpering and crying out. You hated it — hated how good he was, hated that you were about to come on his mouth, hated that you couldn't help but roll your eyes back and shake under his grip while he kept going. No fingers. Just his mouth.
"Miss me, baby?" he asked, rising over you, kissing your breasts, then your face.
"You're so fucking annoying," you said, feeling the weight of his body settle over yours.
"And yet you're gonna let me fuck this pretty pussy of yours, aren't you?"
First you heard the zipper. Then you felt the tip of his cock rubbing against you. He pressed deliberately against your overstimulated clit, toying with it while you fought to hold back a moan.
"Just fuck me already," you tried to sound firm, but your voice came out like a plea.
He chuckled, his hand fisting your hair, tilting your face up to his as he lined himself up and slid inside. It had you biting your lip to swallow the noise — the gasp, whatever sound wanted to escape.
"So tough," he whispered against your mouth.
He began to move his hips, slowly, like he was teasing you — watching every reaction, not letting you hide from his gaze. You remembered how good he felt, but not this good. He was big, that was true, but more than that, he was good — good in the way he moved, good in the way he filled you completely only to pull back and leave you desperate to have him inside again.
"Hollis," you begged, holding onto his arms, his shoulders, scratching through the fabric of his shirt.
"What, baby?" He kissed the corner of your mouth.
"Harder. I want more," you said breathlessly, trying to hold yourself together, but you already sounded so needy.
"Ask nicely," he grinned, and you nearly groaned at him — you would have, if you weren't already whimpering.
"Please," you held his gaze, eyes bright and desperate — because you were. "Please, Holli."
Locking your eyes to his was a terrible mistake. Something inside you shifted, deep in your belly, and you could see by the way he changed too. He picked up the pace — harder, faster — still holding your hair with one hand, the other finding your breast, groping and squeezing with his rough touch. And it all felt so good: the way he drove into you, the way he buried himself so deep it had your toes curling.
The car filled with sound — both of you moaning, your bodies finding each other in loud collision, and how wet you were echoing every time he filled you completely.
You came again, shaking and whimpering. Then you chased a third, pushing him off you so he was sitting up, and you straddled him. You sank down onto his cock and rolled your hips, grinding in slow waves just to feel yourself clenching around his length — and it had him dropping his head back, eyes falling shut.
"Fucking bitch," he muttered.
You teased a moment longer before bouncing again — harder, faster — and Hollis watched like you were performing just for him. You kissed him again, desperate, feeling your body begin to unravel, and he wasn't far behind. His hand wrapped around your throat, holding you steady, and his thumb came up to trace the line of your lips — light, almost careful, a strange tenderness cutting through the heat of it all. You suck into his thumb and came undone looking at him like that. He lifted you off him and you wrapped your hand around his cock, stroking him until he came across your thighs, partly catching the hem of your dress.
He kept kissing you. You kept working him, pulling every last sound from his throat, his moans low and hoarse against your mouth, until he spilled the last of it onto your fingers. You brought them to your lips and licked them clean, earning a slow smile from him.
That quiet, wordless exchange lasted no more than a couple of minutes. Then you moved fast — off his lap, panties pulled up from where they'd been pushed down to your thighs, not a glance in his direction. The guilt came down on you all at once, heavy and suffocating. You were shaking as you smoothed your dress, ran your hands through your hair, checked your makeup in the mirror on the visor.
"Hey," he said softly, reaching for your arm, and you flinched away.
"This. It didn't happen." You looked at him — sharp gaze, voice rough with a rage that wasn't really for him. It was for yourself.
"Sure, I'm fine with that." He raised his hands. "I just wanted to make sure you're okay. I can drive you home, if you want."
For a moment you stared at him, thrown. He was really that unbothered?
"God, you're just—" The words caught in your throat. "Just don't talk to me anymore. Don't look at me — don't!"
He said nothing as you shoved the door open and stepped out of the car, walking fast through the parking lot. You thought about going back inside, back to your friends, but you couldn't face it. You called a car and went straight home.
That night you barely slept. Something felt lodged in your throat, and you felt like the worst person in the world — like you didn't even fit in your own bed. But worse than the guilt was this: you kept replaying every second of it. His touch, his mouth, his voice. Even his taste. And every time you closed your eyes, you were met with that smile of his — that easy, infuriating grin — and the low drawl that drove you mad.
Hollis couldn't be trusted. You were certain of that now. He was no good for your friend.
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Your one night stay at a motel together starts out tense when you go through his phone after you feel like he's been hiding things from you.
disclaimer: read both diewithme and starfall before this! also maybe some of the other mw fics for more context
tags: midwest!hollis, jealous!reader and jealous!hollis, angst and smut, staying in a motel, late night gas station runs, make up sex (you both couldn’t stay mad at each other), quickie kinda, p in v, oral (f receiving)
w/c: 2.9k
a/n: new mw holli fic for yall ^__^ i’ve gotten a few requests to write more angst w them with arguments n such where they ultimately can’t stay mad at eachother so here is one. as usual no screenshotting/talking about this fic outside of tumblr thank u
Gas stations at night always oddly calmed you. The fluorescent lights with the hint of green, the whirr of the freezers on the wall, and the faint radio playing.
You walked through the aisles, trying to figure out which chip brand you felt like eating at the moment. Tonight, you had a motel room booked to stay in for fun with Hollis. It was between that and camping, which you said no to because the amount of bugs this year was atrocious.
Hollis was pacing outside talking to someone on the phone while putting gas into the car. Without even hearing it, you could tell he was talking to that girl you kept hearing him talk to over the last few weeks.
You and Hollis have separate jobs now. You both tried your hardest to get a new one together, but ultimately ended up getting a job at two different places. At first, you were really upset. You’ve admittedly gotten codependent with him, so the idea of working without him being there too was disappointing. Over time, you realized that maybe it would be good for Hollis to meet new people without you. And it was.
Hollis had met a group of people at work that were like him. You were so glad to see that he made friends without your help. But you quickly realized that one of the friends was a girl.
That’s who you think he kept talking to. It didn’t sound like his mom, you knew what his mom sounded like. It had to be a girl from his job. But every time you asked, he gave a different answer.
When he was done with his call, he waved to you from the outside, signaling that he was ready to go.
You grabbed a bag of Lays sour cream and onion chips, gummy worms, and went up to the register.
“Will that be all?”
“One pack of Marlboros and one pack of Newports too, please.” You pointed behind the cashier.
Hollis was waiting for you by the car when you walked back outside. “They didn’t have any Trolli gummy worms, so I just got you these knock off ones.” You held up the bag.
“That’s okay, I like those too. C’mon.”
You both got in the car, and drove away from the gas station. The way to the motel was pretty dark at this time of night. Nothing but flat land on both sides of the road, and the only light coming from the car’s headlights.
It was quiet for the first few minutes. Nothing but the sound of the car and Hollis’ music on the stereo.
“Hollis?”
“Yeah?”
“Who…who were you talking to? At the gas station?” You asked.
He clicked his tongue. “Eh, it was nobody. Work related.”
“You always say that. Aren’t we supposed to tell each other everything?”
“Look. It’s nothing. Why are you worried about that, and not the cool motel I’m about to take you to?” He tried to change the subject. “Reviews said it’s one of the nicest motels out there. No bedbugs, a hot tub, complimentary free drinks.”
You sighed. You weren’t gonna get an answer out of him. At least right now. And you were still excited to go. The whole thing just bothered you, it has for weeks.
You saw him look at you in the corner of your eye. “We’re almost there. Hang tight, I know you’re hungry.”
You turned up the volume on the stereo, staring out of the window and trying to move on from the conversation for now.
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥
The motel’s sign was aggressively neon pink.
Both of your faces were covered in the light of it getting out of the car. It read ‘Motel of Love.’
Hollis and you walked into the lobby. It was already really nice, way nicer than any of the other motels you’ve been to.
“Hi, I have a room booked.” He walked up to the receptionist.
“What’s the name?” The receptionist was clearly tired. She was older, with a cigarette in the corner of her mouth, and a manicure nearly chipped off.
“Hollis.”
“Room number 130. Here’s your key, on the back of it is the Wi-Fi password and a QR code to the room service menu. We had to switch from physical menus to virtual since more than a few guests found it amusing to put their body fluids on them.”
“Oh.” Hollis laughed awkwardly, grabbing the key. “Let’s go.” He nodded his head towards you.
You walked with him to the room. “It’s really nice here, Hollis.”
“I’m glad you like it.” He smiled. “I was worried for a second there that you didn’t.”
“No, it’s great. Really fancy lookin’.”
“Just wait until you see the room.”
110…120…130. Hollis almost missed it. He stopped in front of the door, and got the key out.
“Ladies first.” He put his hand out in the doorway.
“Thank you.” You giggled. You looked around the room. There was one bed. The sheets were red, with white pillows. The bathroom was average, but pretty nice for a motel.
Hollis put his jacket on the back of the door. “I don’t know about you, but I really want to shower.”
“Oh, I’ll let you go first.”
“Alright, thanks. I was gonna let you go first if you wanted to but…well, yeah. Thank you!”
You snickered at his awkward speech. He was so endearing and adorable all the time.
That’s why you felt a bit bad for what you were about to do when he was in the shower. Your eyes glanced at his phone near his suitcase.
Since he wasn’t telling you, you were going to figure it out yourself. It was going to bother you for the whole night if you didn’t.
When you were certain he was in the shower, you grabbed the phone and unlocked it. You both had the password to each other’s phones, because you were that close.
Immediately, you clicked on the Phone app and went to the recent calls. And lo and behold, a female name was within the recent ones. Mandy. With ‘Work’ beside it.
And it wasn’t just one call, it was multiple. You remember some of these. All of the different answers, and it was the same girl every time. Your heart dropped. You were scared to open their text messages. You wanted to see what she looked like first.
You got out of the Phone app and went to his instagram. You clicked on his following and searched for a Mandy. You clicked on the only account that showed up. It was a girl with blonde hair, piercings, and eyeliner.
Each scroll through her profile sent sparks of anger up your spine. He was talking to this girl behind your back. And lying about it.
His face dropped coming out of the bathroom when he saw you standing up with his phone in your hand.
“(Y/n)—”
“Who is Mandy?” You spat immediately.
“Why are you going through my phone?”
“Answer me first. Why are you talking to a whole other girl behind my back?”
Hollis sighed and face-palmed. “It’s just a friend from work. I didn’t think it was that important.”
“Hollis, we tell each other everything. You’ve been lying about it. You said you were on the phone with so many different people, but it has always been this girl.”
Hollis wiped himself off with his towel and dropped it in front of you. He kneeled down to grab clean clothes from his suitcase. “I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d freak out and assume the worst.”
“How can I not freak out with how suspicious you’re moving about it?! I’m just confused why you didn’t tell me. I feel like you’re hiding a lot of stuff from me, and I just don’t want that. I don’t want to be with a man I don’t know.”
He scoffed. “I feel the same way.”
“What?”
He stood up, now fully in his pajamas. “You know how insane it is to find out that your girlfriend was hanging out with multiple men behind your back via an instagram post?”
Your face contorted in confusion, until you realized he meant the coworker from your new job’s party that you went to. “Hollis, that was nothing. It was for work.”
His eyebrows raised in disbelief. “You couldn’t have given me a heads up? You don’t think I'm that dumb, I can’t see the look in those men’s eyes when they talk to you? And you not only go to a party with them, but not tell me about it?”
“I…I just didn’t think it was that important. And come the fuck on, that is nothing compared to literally talking to someone one on one on multiple occasions. And lying about it!” You shouted, flailing your arms around in disbelief.
Hollis laughed coldly, not replying.
“You’re deflecting.” You teared up. You always did whenever you argued. “I just want you to tell me things…when I ask. Like you always used to. It seems like ever since we’ve gotten these new jobs, you haven’t been honest with me.”
“You know how I feel about you hanging out with other dudes like that. It’s already annoying that I couldn’t get the same job as you, now I have to hear the stories about how much the men there flirt with you from your coworkers Instagram’s on my recommended.” Hollis leaned on the wall. “Why couldn’t you tell me about that?”
“I just…” Your voice croaked. “Thought it would be better if you didn’t know about it.”
Hollis walked over, sitting next to you. “Guess we both feel the same.”
You felt bad. What was supposed to be a romantic night together, turned into this. Your mouth hung open, trying to find the right words to say, but nothing came out.
“Look. I’m gonna go smoke. The bathroom’s free.” He quickly put his jacket on, and left the room.
Tears fell from your face. The only sound in the room was your sniffles from you sobbing. After a while, you got up from the bed and went to bathe.
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥
When you came out of the bathroom, he still wasn’t back. In another timeline, you would be telling him how nice the bathtub was and how nice the soap smelt.
Instead, you got dressed in your pajamas and sat on the bed alone. You turned the TV on to break the silence.
You scanned the QR code on the wall with the room service menu. You forgot about the free complimentary drinks, you contemplated taking them up on that offer.
When Hollis got back, you would apologize. You were the one to bring the whole thing up, and it spiraled into what it was. It seemed like both of you just wanted the other to be more honest and open.
After an hour of watching Family Guy reruns and looking at the room service menu still, you heard the door being unlocked.
It was Hollis. The silence was deafening, even with the TV on. He put his jacket on the door.
“I’m sorry.” You immediately blurted out. He looked at you, not saying a word yet. “I’m sorry for going through your phone, and I’m sorry for not telling you about the guys at work, I-I—”
He walked over and sat next to you on the bed. He grabbed your face and smushed your lips together. Your eyes were wide open. His mouth tasted like cigarettes. But you reciprocated it anyway.
It was almost scary. He was silent, but moving so quickly. He climbed on the bed and towered over you, kissing you roughly. You couldn’t tell if he was still mad or not.
His hand groped your breast through your shirt. You felt his crotch. He was rock hard already. He quickly pulled his shorts and boxers down and got his cock out.
You jerked him off with his tongue still in your mouth. His hands pulled your pajama bottoms down with your panties too. He pulled off of the kiss and wasted no time. He grabbed his dick, spread your legs and thrusted inside.
You moaned loudly at how quickly he stretched you. He started going at a fast pace as well.
He panted above you, thrusting away. You laid there and took all of it. Sex was a great stress reliever, it would probably do some good to fuck it out. You had no problem with testing that theory, it had been a few days since you both got the chance to do this.
He leaned in to give you a kiss on the cheek, that was actually meant for your lips. You giggled at that and grabbed his face, connecting your lips again.
The sex was so desperate. He was going so fast, just wanting to cum. The bed squeaked loudly. It seemed like it had been used in this way many times. You trailed your fingers down and rubbed yourself. The way he was acting right now was turning you on so much. It was like a whole different side of him. All of that anger was being put into how hard he was fucking you.
His moans got whinier and messier. He was about to cum, you could tell.
“You gonna cum?” You whispered, looking into his eyes.
“Yeah.” He answered breathlessly. He pulled out at the right time, and jerked himself off on your belly. “Fuck.” He groaned while rubbing himself. You watched all of his cum land on your stomach.
He noticed you didn’t cum yet. He quickly got in between your legs and put his mouth on your pussy. He made his tongue flat and licked up and down. Your hands played with his dirty blonde hair as he licked you to completion. Your face was burning looking at him between your legs.
He looked so focused on making you cum. His tongue swirled around your clit and darted in and out below. You moaned loud when he moved his tongue really fast.
Your head leaned back and your back arched. When he noticed you were about to cum, he went even faster, his eyes watching you the entire time. You gripped the sheets with your right hand as it wracked through your whole body.
You both laid on the bed afterwards, covered in sweat and both trying to catch your breath. The quickie did make you feel a lot better.
“I’m sorry too.” Hollis broke the silence. “I can’t stay mad at you.” He chuckled into a face palm. “I’m supposed to, but I can’t.”
You turned over to look at him.
“Listen. I’m sorry for lying to you. I should’ve just told you in the first place. But I swear to God (y/n), it is nothing like that. At all. She’s…”
You listened intently, resting your hand on your cheek on the pillow.
“She’s my friend. I mean it. And I’ve been meaning to introduce you to her and all the other friends I’ve made, but our schedules keep clashing.” He sighed, and turned over to look in your eyes. “I wish you were there too. But if you want me to stop talking to her, I will.”
“Can we just…promise to keep telling each other everything? No more secrets?” That was really the main issue.
“Yeah.” Hollis pulled you into a hug. “No more secrets.”
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥
For the rest of the night, things finally went as planned. You and Hollis ordered from the room service menu. The free drinks certainly tasted free. You clinked both of your drinks together as a toast on the bed.
“Blagh.” You stuck your tongue out after a sip. “Why does, like, every alcoholic drink kind of taste like shit?”
“I don’t think people drink it for the taste.” He chuckled. “This does suck, though. Probably why it was free.”
After having a drink, you followed Hollis to where the hot tub was. The hotel didn’t seem like it had a lot of residents tonight. Maybe they were all in their rooms.
The tub itself was outside by the pool. The lights inside of it were pink. You took your robe off. You both brought your swimsuits just to do this. You winced a bit, sticking a leg in. “It’s hot.”
“Kinda in the name, babe.” He smiled, taking his robe off too. Something about seeing him shirtless outside like this made you blush. You always forgot how built he was. He was skinny, but still had a bit of muscle. He got in the tub beside you and sighed happily, putting his arm around you. “Isn’t this nice?”
“Yeah.” You snuggled into him in the water. “Isn’t this motel a little eerie though? It feels like we’re the only ones here.”
“Yeah, I like it. Don’t you? Since when are you freaked out by scary places?” He smirked. “Man, we gotta start going out exploring again. We’re gettin’ rusty.”
“It’s our dang jobs taking up all the time. It is cool though. We’re all alone.” You said in a suggestive tone, nuzzled your face in his neck.
He let out a small laugh and leaned his head down, kissing you. “Don’t get any funny ideas, though. I feel like that lady at the front desk would kill us.”
“She looked dead inside.” You chortled. “What if she was, and we feel like we’re alone because all of the residents are ghosts?”
Hollis laughed. “That would be cool. Scary, but cool.”
Back at the hotel room, you changed back into your pajamas and laid in bed with Hollis once again. You were having so much fun, you both almost forgot about the argument from before.
Hollis promised to introduce you to his friends from work as soon as he could when you both got back home. You promised to not go to a party like that without telling him. Overall, you both promised to stop hiding things from each other entirely.
You dozed off in his arms, being lulled to sleep by his heartbeat right below you. The night at the motel went so quick, you thought about asking him to stay for longer in the morning.
