She almost did not jump when Maggie tapped her shoulder. Almost. But maybe Maggie would not mind. “”See you soon.” Helena waved at Maggie and followed Tomas down the road into the village. He did not say anything when they reached his car. It was very big, and white. It had two doors on each side. Head tilted, she watched as he pulled open the second door on the right side of the car.
Inside the car was three seats, all joined together. Two more seats were near the front, with a space.between the seats. In front of the seat on the right, there was a big wheel. Where Tomas said, “”Get in, child,” she set Boris on the car’s floor and climbed inside. Tomas said, “”Stay in the car, child, and don’t touch anything. I’ll be back in just a minute,” and shut the door.
Helena peered into the car. There was a tiny room in the back, with a blue cloth on the floor. She walked to it and sat down. Part of the cloth was not on the floor. It was covering something and part of the something stuck out. Helena tipped her head. The something was black and long. It looked a little like the thing under the sink. One of the nuns called it a pipe. This pipe had a little shorter pipe on the end. Her fingers twitched and she clasped them together in her lap, because Tomas said don’t touch. What was it? It would be nice if the tarp would move more, so she could see more of it, but it did not.
“”Helena!” Tomas’s voice was loud, as if he was saying her name for the third or fourth or maybe fifth time.
“”Here, Tonmas.” She stood up and waved “”Did not hear you. Sorry.”
He sighed. Maybe he could tell she was not very sorry, because she had stayed in the car and also did not touch anything, like he said, and it was still hard to remember that Helena meant her, and she should listen for the word. “”Come and sit down, child. We need to get Maggie.”
She walked back to the three sewed together seats and sat down. Boris was laying under the seat on the floor. “”Tomas? What is back there?” Turning, she pointed to the little room at the back of the car.
“There are many things back there. Turn around now and sit still.”
When she did, Tomas pulled a strange piece of leather across her stomach. It was made of two pieces, one that started over her head, went over her left shoulder and down, stopping in a round piece of metal, with a hole in it, and the other that went across her waist. It ended in the same funny piece of metal as the first one did. The little round metal piece slid into a metal square, making a click sound.
She whimpered, shrinking back against the seat. Her heart went thump thump thump thump in her chest, so hard she could feel it. When she tried to breathe, a very big rock, that she could not see, but could feel, pressed on her chest. Helena pressed her hands over her ears and rocked, back hitting the seat. Maybe the rocking would make her stop feeling the little bed the nuns had put her on for the exorcism, make her stop feeling the leather straps on her wrists, her ankles, her stomach, her shoulders, make her stop seeing the priest’s face, and the nuns’ too, staring at her, every time she blinked.
Tomas was saying something, but she couldn’t hear it over her whimpering and the priest’s chanting, which somehow seemed to have moved from her head to inside the car. Only when Tomas grabbed her wrists, pulled her hands from her ears and said, “”Stop this nonsense, right now,” quiet, with his face very, very close to hers, did everything stop, and it was only the car, and the seat, and Tomas, and the strange leather straps. When she was still, he let go of her wrists. Said, “”Explain yourself, Helena.”
“”The car—” She snuffled, wiping her nose on her sleeve. “”The car was gone and I I was in room, pm little bed, and there were straps, I could not move.”
Tomas frowned. “You’re not making sense, child.”
She pointed to the straps. “”Made me think I was back in convent, during exorcism.”
Tomas nodded. “”I see. Things are different for you, and frightening. Maggie and I understand this.” He held up a hand. “”But you’re far too old to throw tantrums every time something upsets you. Look, you’ve frightened poor Boris with your foolishness.”
She looked where Tomas pointed. He was right. Boris was not on the floor by her feet. He was in the little room in the back, laying by the blue cloth. “I’M sorry,” she said to both of them, and meant it this time.
Tomas said, “”I forgive you, child. Shall we go and get Maggie now,” and Boris pressed his nose into her hand and lay down by her feet again.
She nodded. Said, “Yes, Tomas,” and pet Boris so she would not think about the exorcism anymore. Her face was still hot. Tomas was not angry, and Boris was not frightened. That was good. But—but it was not a tantrumm. She was frightened, not angry. Was it? Tomas said it was. And he said it was foolishness and nonsense also. Like Maggie said, that she had shamed herself, when she screamed and rocked. Screaming was bad—she knew this, even though sometimes she could not stop. Maybe rocking was bad, also. And whimpering. She had cried, this time. Maybe that was also bad.
Before she could ask, the car growled and started moving. Her questions dashed out of her head as she pressed her face to the window.. Oh! They were moving! This was wonderful! Better than the old motorbike the nuns kept in the barn. They did not know she knew about it, but sometimes she rode it through the fields at night, where nobody was. That was very nice, but this was better.
This was like bring in a little room, with very very comfortable chairs, only the room moved. Everything—streets, people, houses, moved by the window as she rode. Almost, she sighed when they had to stop. They had to get Maggie of course but—but—riding was wonderful. Stopping was not. Maybe there would be a long, long ride to their new home.
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