🙋♀️🤦♀️ Anyways, we'll have day 3 for Arirang here and I will go to the fvcking ticket war AGAIN tomorrow while also excited for No Labels Part 02. I wasn't able to scroll here for the past few days because I am sick but I hope the series that I am following have updates so I can make myself happy for the meantime.
꒰🗝️꒱ Your apartment’s being renovated, leaving you without a place to stay for the night. Your childhood friend says you can crash at his place and the catch is he shares it with a flatmate. You weren’t planning on saying yes but it’s the safest and the most reasonable option you have.
⤷ ゛ This story is part of the One Bed Series .ᐟ.ᐟ
⊹ wc .ᐟ 16.8k
pairing: childhood friend!Choi Yeonjun x afab!reader
tags: friends to lovers, mutual pining, sexual tension, original character, attempt humour, fluff, suggestive jokes, drunk!yeonjun, drunken confession [probably missed some]
[MDNI] smut warning: explicit sexual content, dry humping, nipple play, mild dirty talk, heavy petting, big dick!yeonjun, panty fucking, fingering, handjob, mututal masturbation, multiple positions, lotus position, missionary, prone bone, unprotected sex (not huzzah!), creampie (please don't), biting and marking, sweet aftercare [definitely missed some]
first fic of 2026! and also my first yeonjun fic <3 kinda nervous ngl. i have proof read it but there still might be mistakes scattered here and there so i'm really sorry for that ^^ the reference to yeonjun's outfit in the fic was this <3
Reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated!
It occurred to you a second too late that this was going to cost you more than you’d planned for. You had always been good at anticipating consequences. This time, you’d misjudged the timing.
Well — doomed might have been an exaggerated way to phrase it, but it certainly felt that way when you were standing in the middle of what used to be your bedroom. Renovating your apartment didn’t necessarily mean you were knee deep into damnation, sure, but it was definitely up there with the list of inconveniences that made you rethink every decision you’d supposedly made with confidence.
You started out in this place four years ago, back when splitting rent with a flatmate was the only way to survive college without selling your organs on the internet. You moved out of your parents’ house with a cardboard box of belongings and a stubborn idea that you could do everything on your own. You subsisted on project work, internships, weekend shifts, tutoring jobs that paid in both cash and headaches. Thankfully, you had the scholarship money that kept your tuition from eating your rent alive.
Crazy thing is, that somehow landed you a well-paying job the moment graduation ended, and because you had the good sense your friends often accused you of weaponizing, you saved every extra penny you could. You were socking away paychecks the way other people hoarded takeout receipts.
That frugality paid off in the most unexpected way when your landlord announced he was getting married, moving abroad, and— oh, right — selling the apartment! And as if the universe wanted to make the choice painfully convenient, your flatmate had moved out just two weeks prior to your landlord's news without so much as a goodbye party. You had waved while thinking of managing the extra rent money and how nice it would be to have the place under your name.
You were served the choice on a silver fucking platter.
The apartment was Pinterest perfect and it was everything you had ever wanted — light that fell the way soft film light does in pictures, a ten-minute commute to your office, a block of quiet shops where you’d learned the barista by name. And the price was not a fantasy number.
So naturally, you bought it. Papers signed, small celebratory drinks taken, and spent the next few days internally screaming at the idea that you now owned property. You — who once didn’t know how to cook rice without Googling it — now legally possessed a piece of real estate. It made you feel simultaneously grown-up and like an imposter in someone else’s adult life.
It should have been the high point of a long series of sensible choices; the problem, however, was that you had never owned a place before and therefore had no earthly idea that buying an apartment sometimes meant getting a call from the building manager about structural inspections and code compliance. You called your mother later asking for directions, and she laughed at your face before ending the call. How fun!
Not to mention, you had overlooked the single most vital part of the process that you wouldn’t be allowed to live there during the particularly loud, dusty parts of the work; you had overlooked the two-week window of demo and piping and men in fluorescent vests; you had overlooked, most catastrophically, the implication that you needed somewhere to sleep until the hammering stopped.
So yes, doomed was performative, but not untrue.
But see, you had wanted this and you’d earned it. You were also suddenly, gloriously, alarmingly unprepared for the practicalities of owning a place, which was its own kind of chaotic humility. The next logical step was obvious, of course, find a roof for a few nights. Preferably one that didn’t come with the word “hotel.” Preferably one that involved fewer fluorescent vests.
And that, by the mercy of a long-standing friendship who always returned your favors, is how the idea of crashing at Yeonjun’s — because he insisted, and because it was safe, and because your floors were about to sound like the inside of a drum — suddenly stopped being a Plan B and became the only plan you could live with.
Your lord and saviour — Choi Yeonjun — rolled up in his car on the morning of the renovation day. This dude knew when to flaunt style, stepping out of the car like some movie hero wearing sunglasses as he spotted you. A smirk and a cock of his eyebrows as he waved at you, to which your smile painfully twitched at the edges, threatened to snap into an actual scowl, while your brain did the rapid-fire calculation of whether your neighbors had the misfortune of witnessing his stupid ass and embarrassing actions.
“Do I carry your baby first?” he called, pointing finger guns at the potted plant in your hands before pivoting one finger toward you. “Or do I carry my baby first—oomf!”
Whatever punchy line he had prepared died in a strangled squeak as you shoved the plant into his chest to make him stumble backward, his sunglasses sliding down his nose. A perfectly orchestrated disaster in slow motion. You spun away before he could weaponize his cheshire grin.
“Less talking, more helping,” you said over your shoulder. “Handle her gently. She’s seen things.”
Ushering your friend to carefully place the plant at the back of his car, you punctuated all your words and actions with a grateful, charming smile. If he was going to give you a roof over your head until your apartment came back to life, you had to be nice to him, right?
Of course, you knew deep down you didn’t have to act nice. Yeonjun had always been that friend who would show up at your door the moment you even hinted at a problem. Hard times, awkward situations, you name it — he’d be there. There was no hesitation, no ‘let me see if I can help’, no calculating pause to gauge if you deserved it. Sure, you poked fun at each other relentlessly, a constant volley of teasing and one-upmanship that made your friendship a delicate dance of ego and affection but beyond the teasing, beyond the sarcasm, beyond all the jabs that left you both laughing or wanting to rip each other’s head off, Yeonjun had seamlessly morphed into something more permanent than a childhood friend — he was family.
Still, him being so unnervingly well-behaved, so obedient and agreeable, without the faintest attempt at pissing you off was… suspicious. You told yourself to give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he was just in a good mood! But the longer it went one, the more unsettling it became. He didn't let you lift a single thing, intercepting every bag before your hand even reached for them. He even opened the car door for you, palm resting on the roof like a gentleman so you wouldn’t bump your head. Strike two.
Then, when he mentioned taking you out for breakfast before heading to his place, it was the third streak of suspicious behavior that made your internal skeptic raise a fist. Now as a person he was polite, yes. He held doors open for strangers, tipped generously, helped aunties carry groceries without being asked. Yeonjun was a lot of things but being a gentleman with you? He had never once been this much of a gentleman around you, not in the entire twenty-plus years you’d known him.
When he pulled your chair out for you at the cafe, you stopped pretending it wasn’t weird. This was either a setup or a prank.
You cut into your croissant sandwich, flakes scattering across the plate, you threw him a look that could slice steel.
“Yeonjun.” your tone was deceptively light.
He hummed, eyes flicking toward you over the rim of his cup.
“What the fuck aren’t you telling me?”
He inhaled and choked immediately, coffee spraying into the wrong pipe, eyes watering as he grabbed for a napkin. You watched, smiling unbothered as he coughed and wheezed across from you. Someone a table over glanced at him with concern. You smiled at them too.
“God,” he rasped, dabbing at his chin, “can you be a little civil when you speak?”
“Can you noy lie by omission?” you countered, pointing your fork at him. “That face you've been making since you picked me up, and the way you’re acting, all these tell me that you did some shit and expected me to not notice.”
He pressed his lips together, debating whether to deflect or confess. But he deflated real quick under the way you were looking at him. “Okay. It's nothing bad, really.”
“I’ll decide after I hear it.”
“There’s… uh, my cousin. He’s staying over at my place for a bit.”
You paused mid-chew. Ah. That cousin. The name didn't even need to be spoken; you knew exactly which cousin he meant. The same one who used to show up at every family dinner when you and Yeonjun were kids. He was someone you found either tolerable or exhausting depending on the year. You didn’t mind him — but it did mean one thing.
“He’s in your guest room,” you said, not accusing so much as confirming it out loud.
“Yeah,” Yeonjun replied, exhaling through his nose. He pushed his cup aside and scrubbed a hand over his mouth like he was rewinding the morning to find a better entry point. “The spare’s his for now but he’s leaving in three days. I should’ve told you earlier, I know, but—” He cut himself off, rubbing his face. “I didn’t want you stressing more. And I didn’t want you trying to figure out somewhere else and ending up somewhere sketchy because you didn’t want to inconvenience me.”
You ran through the alternatives you already knew would fail. It was nearly Christmas; most of your friends were out of town for the holidays, parents were too far to make daily check-ins on the renovation feasible, and hotels were a financial joke you weren’t in the mood to entertain.
Inconvenient as it was, he had a point.
You sighed, shaking your head once, eyes lifting back to him. “No, you’re right,” you said finally, tone even, “that this is genuinely the least terrible option I have.”
The relief that crossed his face was immediate and, frankly, humiliating. “I’ll make it up to you.” He paused, frowned, then added, “I already am, technically. Breakfast. Transportation. Emotional support. I feel like those are solid offerings.”
“Don’t push it,” you muttered, snorting as you reached back for your food, nudging a fallen flake of pastry aside with your fingertip before taking another bite. You chewed slowly, watching him as you half-expected another shoe to drop. Thank god he didn’t let it.
Instead, he straightened in his chair, suddenly looking earnest in a way that made you wary.
“Seriously, though,” he said, clasping his hands together on the table. “You won’t feel uncomfortable, I promise. You will take my room. I’ll crash on the couch. It’s fine. I’ve slept on worse. Floors. Airport chairs. That one time in the back of a van or—” he paused, lifting a finger as a better idea struck him mid-sentence, “—I can even stay in my cousin’s room. He owes me. For, like, several things. Some of them are crimes.”
“Yeah, I don't wanna know about the last one,” you spoke solemnly, giving him a long look. Still, you were surprised by how carefully he was laying it out, as though he were afraid one wrong word might tip the balance. “Also, no, that won't be necessary,” you said, shaking your head as you felt bad when he mentioned giving up his bed. “I trust you, Yeonjun. And I’m grateful you even thought this far ahead for me.”
He nodded quickly, like he’d expected resistance. “I know. I just—listen, I don’t want you lying awake wondering if you’re being a problem. You’re not, and you’ll never be.” He reached across the table then, nudging your plate closer when he noticed you’d drifted away from it.
A funny sort of silence dawned upon you two. You gave him another long look. He returned it to you.
“Yeonjun,” you whispered, leaning forward with your nose scrunching as if you’d just bitten into something unexpectedly sour. “This whole formality thing is getting weird. Like, physically uncomfortable.”
He gave a long sigh of relief then leaned in too. “Right? I thought I was losing my mind, but no. No, this is wrong,” he whispered back, eyes comically wide. He dragged a hand down his arm, shivering. “It’s like my body knows this isn’t how we talk and it’s protesting.” He paused, then added scandalously, “I hate it.”
“See, this is why I like you, Jjunie. We’re always on the same page. Always,” you said in a sing-song voice. You nudged his foot lightly with your shoe under the table, not bothering to look down. “Besides, I would've kicked your ass if you hadn’t given me your place to crash.”
“Please,” he scoffed, lifting his cup for a sip. “You wouldn’t have gotten the chance. My mom would’ve beaten you to it the moment she found out.” He shook his head, setting the cup down with a soft clink. “I can hear it already. ‘You had space and you let her struggle?’ Best believe I’d be dead.”
You resumed eating as you said, “I love your mom, Jun.”
Too focused on the sudden call from one of your leading renovating workers, you failed to notice the soft smile playing on his face. And somewhere in that moment, Yeonjun raised his mug, hiding whatever had crossed his face before you could catch it.
You barely made it past the threshold before Joonho’s arms banded around your shoulders with zero regard for physics, personal space, or the fact that you were well into your late twenties and not, in fact, a long-lost child returning from war.
The air left your lungs in a sharp rush as he squeezed, voice booming against the side of your head as he marvelled loudly at how much you’d grown, how long it had been, how he couldn’t believe you were standing here now. You returned the enthusiasm in theory only, patting his back and waiting it out as you knew resistance would only prolong the ordeal.
Oxygen was becoming a fond memory when your mental plea was answered not by Joonho, but by Yeonjun, who caught the back of his cousin’s shirt and hauled him away in one smooth motion until Yeonjun deposited him a respectable distance away. His palm still fisted in cotton like he was restraining an overexcited dog.
“Hands to yourself,” Yeonjun said mildly.
“I was welcoming her.”
“There are better ways to do that. You’re in her space, dipshit.”
Yeonjun released him, then turned to you without missing a beat, eyes flicking over your face once. He reached down, plucked your bag from beside your feet before you could argue, and slung it over his shoulder. “Come on.”
As you were about to follow him down the short hall, you paused only when Joonho snickered behind you.
“Big fan of whatever this is,” he said, gesturing vaguely between the two of you.
You glanced back at him, then at Yeonjun’s retreating figure, and decided not to make an effort to investigate. Joonho had always lived on a frequency you never quite tuned into, always spoken in sideways implications, even when you were younger. And you’d learned long ago that dissecting his words rarely led anywhere useful. Whatever he thought he was observing could remain his own private entertainment.
Yeonjun kept his promise and then some; fresh sheets stretched tight across the bed, pillowcases crisp and smooth beneath your fingers, the whole space scrubbed of any trace that it had been occupied the night before. It did not look like a guest setup hastily arranged out of obligation.
He had opened the wardrobe as well, sliding hangers aside and clearing a section that was conspicuously empty for you to keep your clothes. Yeonjun stepped back for you and leaned against the wardrobe, folding his arms as he watched you unzip your bag and begin sorting through its contents.
“You didn’t need to bring clothes, though,” he mentioned offhandedly, glancing toward the open bag as you reached for another sweater. “You could’ve just worn mine.”
You snorted, crouching lower to fish out a pair of folded jeans, smoothing them over your thigh before placing them away. “Have you ever heard the phrase ‘feeling comfortable in your own skin’?” you asked, tipping your head to look at him. “Hmm?”
He shifted his stance, one heel tapping lightly against the floor as his mouth curved and he caught his bottom lip between his teeth. “I’m fairly certain that phrase is meant to imply a totally different thing, but—”
“What I mean,” you cut in, rising to your feet with the drawer sliding shut under your palm, “is that you’ve already done more than enough.” You turned fully toward him then, hand still resting on it as if to brace the point. “You don’t need to keep adding to it or be stressed on my behalf.”
“Not stressed,” he murmured, pushing off the wardrobe and reaching past you to close the doors. The motion boxing you in for a second too long to ignore before he stepped back again. “And it’s not really extra effort.”
The evidence of his earlier feline grin was long gone. What replaced it didn’t look like seriousness so much as absence, a rare unreadable look that felt oddly out of character.
“I just like seeing you in my clothes.”
The startling absence of empty flirtiness in his voice made your heart do a bewildered lurch. These words and antics from Yeonjun were not new to you. You had heard variations of that line before, over the years, reshaped and repackaged into jokes you both knew how to handle. This time, there was no such padding.
Scoffing, you stepped into his space planting both hands on his shoulders and turning him bodily toward the door. “Why, because they look better on me than on you?” you said lightly, nudging him forward as you laughed, giving him a final push toward the hallway. “Careful, might steal your fame as the best dressed person in every room.”
“Going ahead of yourself is, unfortunately, a flaw you should really work on—hey, ouch,” he cut himself off with a sharp hiss when you pinched the back of his arm in retaliation, turning back to glare at you over his shoulder. He tried to maintain dignity while rubbing at the spot, but the effect was ruined by the way his mouth pulled into a sulk. “That was uncalled for. Absolutely unprovoked.”
“That’s for the slander,” you said, unrepentant.
“Unbelievable,” he muttered, holding his arm with pursed lips. “I open my home, my wardrobe, my heart—”
“Door,” you calmly corrected, pointing.
Thankfully whatever foreign feeling that had momentarily settled in your heart got promptly flattened by the delight you got from his reaction. With a sulking and pouting yeonjun finally leaving you alone, you unpacked taking your time. The rest of the day dissolved into motion with trips back and forth from your apartment, calls with the renovation team, photos sent, questions answered, decisions made until your head felt heavy. By the time night settled in properly, exhaustion had worked its way into your bones.
The boys floated the idea of a movie night. You declined without much thought. Yeonjun caught on immediately with just one look at you, shut Joonho off before he could protest himself hoarse, shooing you toward the hallway with an insistence that you rest. You mumbled goodnight to both of them and retreated into his room.
Sleeping anywhere other than your own bed usually left you staring at the ceiling, counting phantom shadows and waiting for rest that never quite came. You expected the same here. But despite the unfamiliarity of the space, the familiarity of his scent clinging to the subspaces clouded your senses and soon enough, lulled you into a gentle, dreamless sleep.
You woke to the smell before you were fully awake. Hunger nudged you down the hall and into the kitchen, where roasted beef and coffee welcomed you all at once. Yeonjun stood at the counter with a paper bag torn open, unpacking takeout containers one by one. He lined them up with his sleeves pushed to his elbows, hair still flattened in odd directions from sleep. He glanced over when you shuffled in, his mouth curving into a soft acknowledgment.
“Morning,” he said, nudging a coffee cup closer to the machine. “You sleep all right?”
You answered with a nod and stepped closer, close enough that your arm brushed his. Closer still, until you leaned into him and let your cheek rest against the solid warmth of his bicep, your eyes half-closing as you watched his hands work. You thought you felt him stiffen for a nano moment, not really putting much thought behind it when he resumed his flow of work. He was humming under his breath.
“Smells… insane,” you murmured, the words arriving late and dragged out of sleep as you reached for a fry before nibbling on it with little care for manners.
He glanced down at you, then at the fry between your fingers, and nudged the plate an inch farther from the counter’s edge with his knuckle. “You’re going to tip over,” he said, not stopping what he was doing.
“Mm,” you answered, voice muffled where it pressed into his shirt as you shifted closer instead of backing off. “Food’s taking too long. I’m supervising. Very hands-on position.”
“Ahh, important role,” he humoured you dryly. “If I mess this up, I assume there’s a formal complaint process?”
“Immediate termination,” you said, reaching for another fry and bumping his forearm in the process. “Start over. New kitchen. New cook.”
Footsteps approached, heavier and less considerate than yours had been. Joonho filled the doorway with a stretch and a yawn, pausing mid-motion when his eyes landed on the picture you made leaning into Yeonjun’s side.
“Wow,” he said, blinking once as if his brain needed a second pass. “Good morning to… this,” he added.
You didn’t bother lifting your head. “Morning to you too,” you said, reaching blindly for a fork and tapping it against the counter in his direction. “If you’re going to stare, at least make yourself useful.”
Yeonjun took the opportunity to gently step away, sliding a plate into your hands in the same motion. “Sit down,” he told you, gesturing toward the chair. “I’ll get you your coffee.”
Joonho snorted, grabbing a sandwich and already taking a bite. “Funny to see you two play house in your grown age.”
You dropped into the chair, blinking up at them both. “I’ve been here less than twenty-four hours. Calm down.”
“Twenty-four hours is plenty,” Joonho replied, reaching for the napkins and dragging the whole stack toward himself. “People have made worse life decisions faster.”
Yeonjun clicked his tongue under his breath as he poured the coffee, before sliding it across the counter toward you without looking. “Like how you once agreed to a group trip after knowing people for twelve hours, Joonho? Should I remind you that financial recovery took months?” he said, giving his cousin a flat look.
You wrapped both hands around the mug the second it reached you. The heat pressed into your palms as you leaned back in the chair. Your eyes drifted between them while the kitchen filled with their cacophonies of back-and-forth jabs. You smiled to yourself because some things truly never change.
That noon found you folded into the corner of the couch with your laptop balanced on your thighs as you sorted through your work emails. Joonho had left the house an hour ago, and Yeonjun had mentioned — almost in passing — that he’d shower before heading out to work. You reached for your phone to cross-check a note and came up empty-handed, the absence registering slowly and you frowned after patting the cushion beside you, then the coffee table, then the pocket of your cardigan. You then remembered that you’d set it down on Yeonjun’s bed earlier, right before you wandered back out to the living room with your coffee.
You could still hear the water running so you figured announcing yourself wasn't necessary as you nudged his door open with your shoulder, eyes already sweeping the bed in search of your phone. Spotting it near the pillow you crossed the room quickly, you grabbed it just as the bathroom door opened behind you.
Yeonjun stepped out with a towel thrown over one shoulder, skin still dewy and sweatpants riding low on his hips, droplets tracing idle paths down his chest as he scrubbed at his hair with the towel. His movements were thoughtless until his gaze lifted and landed on you, stalling mid-rub.
“Oh—” The word left you only after you looked up from the bed and actually took him in, phone clutched loosely in your hand. “Sorry. I was just grabbing my phone. I didn’t think you’d be out yet.”
He scrambled to make a sound that sounded like it had been meant as a laugh and didn’t quite make it. Shifting his stance he hooked his thumb into the waistband of his sweatpants and tugged them a fraction higher. He turned away a little like he was giving you space.
“No, it’s—yeah. You’re fine,” he replied.
Now, the only sensible option would have been to retrieve your phone and retreat, to give your friend of over two decades space to finish getting dressed, right? You were about to do it, you swear. Yet, your feet stalled where they were and your attention stayed anchored on him in a way that felt mildly inconvenient because while Yeonjun shirtless was hardly a new visual in the long archive of your shared history (memories stacked with sunburnt afternoons and public pools, shared vacations involving Yeonjun shirtless in some capacity, borrowed shirts tossed at your face) — none of that had ever felt strange. The version of him standing there now carried angles and proportions your memory lagged behind on.
You knew he worked out; you’d heard him complain about sore muscles, had teased him about protein shakes crowding the fridge, endured the commentary about macros and sleep cycles with the indulgence reserved for habits that had always been his. None of this was new. But, what was new was the geometry of him now. Your brain took an extra second to update its internal file on him around the fact that his body no longer matched the version it had filed away a few months ago — definition etched where there used to be softness, shoulders carrying a broader span, and that he looked… bigger, in a way that demanded attention.
“Did you—” you began, then paused, redirecting mid-thought as your gaze traced the shallow grooves along his stomach while he shifted to face you. “Have you been working out lately? Because —” you gestured at him, gaze openly evaluative in a way that had never felt off-limits between you. “— holy shit. You look big.”
His mouth curved before he could stop it, teeth flashing in a brief, reflexive grin as he glanced down at himself, then back at you. “Yeah,” he said, bracing one hip against the edge of the dresser, the motion pulling a subtle flex through his torso. “I’ve been more consistent. Work’s been a lot lately, so I figured I’d channel it somewhere useful.”
“Makes sense,” you murmured, already closing the remaining space, your curiosity steering you forward with no sense of consequence, fingers pressing into his upper arm. You squeezed once, then again, brows knitting with genuine interest. Even when he wasn't flexing, his muscles were so well defined that it almost resembled a sculpture, so tenderly pleasing to the eye. “Damn,” you added softly to yourself. “This couldn’t have been easy to get.”
You were standing so close that the residual warmth from the shower still rolling off him reached you without effort, bleeding into the small space between you. He drew a breath through his nose, shoulders lifting and lowering with it as he adjusted his footing again, fingers regripping the towel. “It wasn’t,” there was pure honesty in the way he spoke. “It did take a while, almost gave up halfway through. Hasn't been easy, yeah.”
“The hard work definitely paid off, Jun. You look incredible.” You hummed, still distracted and testing the muscle under your thumb, then gave a small nod like you’d reached a satisfying conclusion. “I mean, you could probably pick me up and toss me across the room if you wanted.”
You looked up only after the sentence cleared your mouth, catching the way he cocked a brow as his gaze dropped to your hand and then climbed back to your face. The flush at his ears looked deeper up close, spreading across his cheekbones that made you briefly wonder if the water had been hotter than usual, because surely that had to be it. A corner of his mouth slowly tipped upward, and he leaned in just enough for heat to register.
“You’d like that, huh?”
There was a sudden flip that rippled through your stomach as your fingers flexed around his muscle, and you were acutely aware of how close he was now — you could count the faint freckles at his shoulder, close enough that your gaze traced down his chest before you caught yourself and brought it back up, a strange recalibration happening as your mind still struggled to place this version of him into a category that made sense.
It wasn’t that he looked different so much as the fact that you were seeing him differently… again. Noticing proportions, noticing presence, noticing how little distance there actually was between you, and the awareness made your breath hitch to be baffling and — oh, god. You must've been crazy.
Whatever this moment was, it stretched past its welcome before he was the one to break it, stepping away with a quick motion. That sent a ripple of cooler air across your skin as he reached for the shirt draped over the chair, pulling it on with brisk efficiency. You let air fill your lungs once more.
“Anyway,” he said, already moving past you toward the hall, grabbing his wallet from the counter as he glanced in the direction of the kitchen. “I’ve gotta head out and do the grocery run. Joonho’s dead set on cooking tonight, so I can’t bail out.”
And by the time you could come up with a properly formed sentence, the main door’s closing sound echoed through the house. You stood there in the middle of the room, phone clutched between your fingers as you frowned and shook your head once, then again, like that might settle whatever had been stirred loose. But it didn't shake off the jittery feelings still infesting your insides.
Joonho came back not long after Yeonjun left. Tossing his keys lazily onto the counter he announced that his boss had apparently decided that becoming a new father was reason enough to let everyone clock out early, which you accepted with polite skepticism until he held up a paper bag sagging with baked goods. He unloaded the story between bites of custard-filled bread and sips of tea. That is until the sugar crash nudged you back toward responsibility and your laptop, relocating yourself on the dining table while Joonho occupied the sofa.
You’d barely settled back into work when your phone buzzed, Yeonjun’s name lighting up the screen. You answered, shoulder tilting to pin the phone there as you scanned a line of text on your screen.
“Hey,” you said absently, typing.
“Okay, quick question,” he started, and there was a gravity to his tone that made you squint, “I need you to tell me if this sounds right.”
That alone was concerning.
“Okay,” you encouraged. “Go on.”
“There’s this packet of red chillies,” he continued, voice careful, “five pieces. Thirty thousand won per pound. That’s… normal, right?”
Your fingers stopped moving. Your brain, for a brief and merciful second, did too.
Thirty thousand for five fucking chillies.
The neurons in your head cycled through the numbers once, twice, like a buffering screen, searching desperately for context that would make this sentence make sense. Because surely this was a joke, or he had misread the tag, or Yeonjun was annoying you on purpose. Yes. That had to be it.
Choi Yeonjun could not possibly be standing in a grocery store, contemplating financial ruin over five sad little chillies. He was a grown man with a job and a functioning life. He could not possibly be asking you, with sincerity, whether five chillies were worth that much money.
“You—” you began, then stopped, unable to form a proper speech, “where did you even find five chillies for thirty thousand?”
From the couch, Joonho muted the television without looking at you, his attention suddenly razor-focused on the conversation.
On the other end, you heard the rustle of plastic. “It’s this stall near the entrance. Oh, they’re imported,” Yeonjun said, as if that explained everything.“They look good. Like, actually good. Not wrinkly. And the guy says they’re fresh.”
You closed your eyes and pinched the bridge of your nose, exhaling through your mouth. Fresh. That was his defense. Okay, so maybe the frontal lobe development had, in fact, skipped a step.
“Yeonjun,” you said, voice still level. “Why are you even standing there.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean why are you considering it?” You were now rising from your chair and beginning to pace. “Yeonjun, please listen to me. This is how people get scammed. Put them back.”
“You sure?” he asked, genuine concern threading his voice. “Because they look really—”
“No, no, no. Why are you still standing there? I’m begging you to use your brain for two seconds and put that back,” you cut in, stopping short by the window before beginning to pace again.
There was a beat of silence on the other end, followed by a faint shuffle.
“Are you freaking out about the price?” he asked, trying to soothe you. “It’s okay, I can afford it.”
You stopped walking. You were about to need more patience than this.
“That’s not the point!” you snapped, words tumbling out faster now. “The point is that just because you can afford to get scammed doesn’t mean you should. Do you know how much chilli powder you could buy with that? Paste! An entire plant! You could grow your own for that money.”
“Okay, but these are whole—”
“No!” you cried out with an exasperated sigh. “No, don’t ‘whole’ me. This is not about whole versus powdered. This is about you standing in a market, looking at five vegetables, and thinking, yeah, this seems reasonable.”
“Alright, alright.” He laughed softly, the sound carrying through the line. It felt funny in your chest. “No need to panic.”
“I’m being practical,” you shot back, dragging a hand through your hair. “There’s a difference. Please. I’m asking you. Step away from the chillies.”
“I’ll then get some paste.”
“Yes,” you said immediately, collapsing back into your chair. “Or powder. Or nothing. Honestly, nothing is preferable to this.”
The call ended not long after, Yeonjun promising to text you before buying anything else, and you let your phone drop into your lap, staring at the ceiling for a moment as the leftover headache ebbed. If the universe had decided that you were meant to orbit a man who could be trusted with big things but not small, overpriced ones, then so be it. You’d known him long enough to accept that trade-off. Someone whose nonsense still brought a reluctant fondness out of you even as it shaved years off your lifespan.
“You should marry him.”
Whisplashed, you gawked at Joonho. He had said it without looking over, eyes still on the muted television as his fingers reached into the paper bag on the table, fishing for another pastry.
“Then he wouldn’t be doing stupid shit like this,” he added, sounding pragmatic rather than provocative.
“Dude—what?” You barked out a sound that might have been a laugh if it hadn’t caught awkwardly in your throat. “Where did that even come from?”
He glanced up then, brows lifting just a notch as if he were surprised you hadn’t already arrived there yourself. “I’m serious,” he said then added, “I’m surprised, actually.”
“Surprised about what?” you still couldn’t conceal the bewilderment.
“Now, why do you sound surprised?” he pointed a finger at you. You figured he might have guessed you’d stay quiet until he gave you a proper explanation. Luckily, he gave you one. “Think about it. You’ve known him forever. You already manage his life half the time.”
“Okay,” you said slowly. “So?”
“From watching the two of you for most of my life,” he said, waving his hand. “I’m honestly surprised you two never dated. Not in high school, not in university. People with half your history usually screw it up at least once just to get it out of their system.”
You let out a frustrated snort as you crossed your arms, shaking your head. “Absolutely not. That is not how that works. That’s not how anything works.”
Joonho watched you for a beat before inquiring, tone unchanged. “You’ve really never thought about marrying him? Like, not even once?”
You were ready with rebuttals you’d used a hundred times. Timing had never lined up — that was always the first excuse. Friendship was safer, the second. And there were lines that once crossed couldn’t be redrawn, which was reason enough to stop before anything began.
But nothing came out. Because instead, your mind slid sideways into territory it had always avoided, and suddenly there he was not as your childhood friend calling from a grocery aisle, but as a constant presence folded into the mundane architecture of your life.
You imagined waking up in the muted light of early morning, the fragrance of brewed coffee curling through the kitchen as Yeonjun shuffled around in one of his beloved tank tops; the mundane comfort of scrambled eggs and toast punctuated by lazy smiles exchanged over mismatched mugs. You saw yourself bundled in his jacket for grocery runs that ended with impulse snacks tossed into the cart. The shared fatigue of evenings where you came home at different times but always ended up in the same place, and the nights blurred into soft, whispered conversations before sleep.
And in every scenario, there was the brief yet startling intimacy of sharing a kiss. It didn’t leave you shaken, rather it left a sweet aftertaste in the palate of your thoughts. Despite how much you denied, you knew it wasn’t just a sweeping vision. It was nothing cinematic nor inflated because it arrived in pieces, ordinary enough to feel borrowed from a life you could plausibly live.
“Ah, there it is!” Joonho snapped his fingers and leaned back against the couch. “That faraway look. It’s a nice picture, isn’t it?” A pause, then a crooked smile. “You’re picturing it right now. I can tell. Wild that you two never did the whole childhood‑promise nonsense. Pinky swears, wedding vows at seven years old, not even a ‘if we’re still single at thirty’ deal. Feels like a missed cliché, honestly.”
“Yeah, well,” you replied too quickly, reaching for your mug and lifting it to your lips before realizing it was empty, the ceramic knocking lightly against your teeth. You set it down gently. “That stuff exists in movies for a reason.”
Joonho remained silent then began folding the top of the paper bag shut. “I’m not trying to push you, but you really never thought about it?” then he stole a quick glance at you. “Because you didn’t say no.”
You seriously cannot be thinking about Yeonjun this way after all these years.
Again.
The lack of speech from you wasn’t making the space empty; it was getting full of all the unsaid and unexpressed feelings you had harboured for your childhood friend years ago in your younger days. Yes, you had thought about it. No, you had never acted on it, because cowardice had been easier than loss. You had decided, over and over, that wanting him was a risk you couldn’t afford, that Yeonjun mattered too much to gamble on a crush you’d once dismissed as juvenile and temporary, even when it wasn’t. You couldn’t risk altering the shape of your life with him. So you learned how to live alongside it until it dulled into background noise.
You had dated men who were good, men who listened and showed up and treated you with respect, men who looked good beside you and fit neatly into your life. You had done everything to replace the habit of thinking about Yeonjun.
But none of them were Yeonjun, and none of them ever would be. His ghost was bound to forever haunt you.
Even more now that Joonho brought up the topic and awakened latent emotions. The thought, once placed, refused to leave.
“I…” You exhaled, the word thinning into nothing. You still couldn’t say the truth, so you reached for the closest thing that sounded acceptable. “I don’t know.”
So, as it turned out, letting your feelings crawl back to the surface and sit there had consequences, chief among them the fact that you were now painfully alert to Yeonjun’s presence in a way you hadn’t been in years.
That was exactly what you had been dealing with since your last talk with Joonho. Now, you were even more knee deep into this war with yourself as you stared down at your phone, the college batch group chat hollering with enthusiasm about a pre‑Christmas gathering tonight. Names you knew too well kept chiming in with zeal and inside jokes resurfaced that felt almost contagious. You had never been a difficult person to exist around; you didn’t collect grudges, didn’t leave messes behind you in the form of unresolved conflicts. There was no reason not to go and the longer you scrolled, the harder it became to justify sitting this one out without sounding evasive, even to yourself.
Except there was still one very real problem you kept circling back to.
The couch dipped beside you as Yeonjun dropped down with his thigh brushing your knee. The scent of his shampoo crowded your senses.
“Did you check the chat?” Yeonjun asked, already craning his neck closer, his arm stretching out behind you along the backrest.
“That’s literally what I’m looking at,” you replied, tilting the phone slightly so he could see, even as your awareness narrowed to the point of contact between you.
“Oh,” he said, drawn‑out, almost pleased. “Do you want to go?”
You stayed silent a beat too long because you were still unsure if you could squeeze it into your agenda. Yeonjun caught the hesitation immediately. He shifted so he could look at your face instead of the phone.
“You don’t want to?” he asked slowly. Then quicker, before you could answer, “It’s fine if you don’t. I won’t go either. We can stay in, order takeout, talk about how annoying everyone was in college—”
“No, wait,” you cut in, sitting upright. You gestured vaguely with your phone. “It’s just… I don’t know,” you said, which had become a familiar placeholder lately.
Yeonjun raised his brows with a small nod, patient with you as he always is.
“I do want to go. I’m just thinking about the renovation mess. My workload has swelled into something unwieldy with year‑end deadlines looming, and I don’t want to spend the whole night half‑present, and everything feels a little—” You stopped yourself, then glanced at him. “Besides, what do you mean you'd sit out for me if I didn't go? Don’t say things like that.”
He shrugged, too casual for the way his eyes stayed on your face. “I mean exactly what I said.”
You stared back at him, incredulous. “I could never let you do that, idiot. You should go if you want to. Your friends miss you—I’m sure of it.”
There was a beat where he didn’t respond. Instead, he leaned forward with elbows on his knees as he tilted his face to stare up at you. There was a faint crease between his brows.
“You’re more important to me,” he said plainly.
The look in his eyes translated as if the answer was an obvious fact rather than something that sent your thoughts skidding.
“Oh,” you managed, and before you could find your footing again, he reached out and tucked your hair behind your ear.
“But I do think you should come with me,” he said. “We’ll go together. You’ve been running yourself into the ground for weeks. I can help with the rest—your workload, the apartment, whatever you need, you know that, right? You deserve to have fun.”
“Yeah,” you said finally, a small smile breaking through. “Yeah. That’d be good.”
You had to stop by your apartment first. Everything you’d brought to Yeonjun’s place had been chosen for convenience and nothing meant to be seen outside of errands and long days. Tonight called for winter-appropriate and a presentable version of yourself. You registered what Yeonjun had worn. Faded gray jeans, a white shirt pulled neat beneath a red tie and above it a black jacket.
Yeonjun lingered in your living room while you changed. When you stepped back out, his attention followed you and stayed there.
“Ready?” he asked.
“Yeah,” you answered, shrugging into your coat while you checked that you hadn’t forgotten anything obvious.
“You look beautiful,” he said, grabbing the keys from the table and tossing them once into his palm, “you’re about to make people regret not seeing you more often.”
You scoffed, though heat crept up your neck as you stepped past him toward the door. “Save it. Sweet talk isn’t getting you out of driving tonight,” you said, toeing off your shoes to trade them for boots.
“Please.” He laughed, holding the door open as you stepped into the cold, breath fogging between you. “Wouldn’t even dream of it, pretty.”
The car sealed you both inside against the cold the moment you shut the door, and you exhaled a shiver in comfort as the heater kicked on under Yeonjun’s quick adjustment of the controls. You fiddled with the music player while he drove to your destination. At a red light, he pointed out a bakery you both used to skip classes for. You told him it still sucked. He said you were lying. Neither of you followed it up.
By the time you arrived the voices and music had swallowed the night whole. Faces you hadn’t seen in years surfaced all at once, hugs exchanged, names called across the room as people stepped forward to participate in the greeting. Yeonjun barely made it three steps before someone clapped a hand against his back and dragged him away, then another voice called his name, then another, leaving you standing with your own circle as he was absorbed into his. He turned back to look for you instinctively as if to check you’d found your footing, and you gave him a small nod, a wordless assurance that you were fine.
“I’ll find you,” he promised, raising his voice slightly over the noise.
You laughed, waving him off. “Go. You’re clearly in demand.”
Much later, across the room when you were done with dinner, your eyes met. He had a drink in hand now, jacket gone, hair no longer sitting quite the way it had earlier, and you lifted your brows in a silent check-in. He smiled back in all teeth before someone leaned into his space again and pulled his attention elsewhere.
“Are you seeing anyone these days, or is work still your tragic soulmate?”
You were sharing a table with three other women you hadn’t seen properly since graduation. It was Mina who sent the question your way while nudging your elbow with hers, eyes bright with wine and curiosity.
You huffed a laugh as you reached for your drink. “Work’s winning by a humiliating margin,” you said, taking a sip before setting it back down and wiping a thumb along the rim. “I don’t even think I’m putting up a fight.”
“That tracks,” Hana chimed in. Her tone carried a dry affection as she was someone who’d watched you live like this for years. “You were always like that. We thought you’d mellow out after uni, but somehow you got worse.”
“N-no, she dated,” Jieun cut in far too eagerly (and drunkenly) before you could respond. The wine in her glass dangerously sloshed as she lifted her hand in defense of your reputation. “I saw pictures. Ni—ce pictures. She had—had a boyfriend. The last one. What was his name?” She squinted at you as though the answer might be written on your face. You smiled unhelpfully at her. “Joohyuk? Joohyuk, right? Yeah. Him. Shame you broke up. I liked him.”
Mina groaned and reached over to push Jieun back into her seat. “You sound like you were dating him yourself. Use your words properly before you get yourself in trouble.”
You had to stifle a laugh as you watched Jieun’s eyes comically widen followed by a disgruntled Mina giving her an earful and Hana’s atrocious cackle. Oh, how you missed this.
“No—no, I didn’t mean it like that!” Jieun protested, waving both hands, then stopping to grip the edge of the table for balance. “I meant he was good. For her. As a person. I’m not stealing anyone’s man,” she rushed, then looked at you with genuine concern. “You know what I mean, right?”
“I know,” you said, laughing as you slid Jieun’s glass a little farther from the table’s edge before it could become a casualty. “You’re safe, Jieun. Don’t worry. But please sit properly, you're going to give me a heart attack if you fall off.”
The clatter of surrounding voices bled into the gaps as someone nearby laughed too loudly. You took your time before speaking again, fingers resting loosely around your glass as your gaze met Mina’s before drifting to Hana.
“It wasn’t a bad breakup. We talked it through instead of letting it rot, and we both knew whatever we had wasn’t taking us anywhere we wanted to go.” You smiled and sipped on your drink as you told them. “He’s a good man. Just not the right one for me, and I think he knew that too.”
Mina listened with her chin propped on her knuckles, then nodded once, thoughtful. “Honestly, it feels like everyone either married their first serious partner or walked away from dating entirely and hasn’t recovered since.”
Hana’s attention snagged on something past your shoulder. She tracked movement across the room before returning her focus to you.
“Speaking of nothing sticking,” she said, lowering her voice slightly, “have you noticed Yeonjun’s pattern?”
His name cut clean through the pleasant haze of wine you’d settled into. “What pattern?” you asked with the same smile, curiosity worn lightly rather than forced.
“Oh my god,” Mina said at once, scooting her chair closer with a scrape that drew the table tighter together, her forearm sliding across the wood as she leaned in. “I forgot how popular he is. Didn’t he date, like… a lot?” She rolled her wrist vaguely, as though quantity mattered less than the impression it left.
“Not a lot,” Hana countered, brow pinching as she tried to sort memory from hearsay. “Just— often, I guess? It never lasted though. A month, maybe less. You’d blink and suddenly he was single again.” She shrugged.
“I’ve heard that too,” Mina added, lips pursing as she considered her wording, eyes flicking briefly toward the crowd before returning to you. “He’s kind of… how do I say this nicely.” She paused, eyes narrowing in thought before she gave a small, apologetic smile. “A bit of a heartbreaker.”
You listened without interrupting, watching the condensation trail down the side of your glass before you brushed it away with your thumb. In that pause you recognized how little the conversation stirred you. A strange sense of distance was all you felt because what they were trading wasn’t Yeonjun so much as a shorthand version of him, assembled from overheard endings and retold assumptions.
Aside from feeling distant, there was also relief in understanding that distinction, in knowing that the version of him they were dissecting had never belonged to you in the first place.
They liked Choi Yeonjun as a name that moved through rooms. They liked the idea of him by talking about him as if he were a concept instead of a person you’d shared scraped knees, late-night calls, and entire versions of your life with. They didn’t know him as the one whose first relationship faded because they were barely old enough to know what they were asking of each other, and whose second ended because trust was broken on the other side, not his. Nothing beyond that except him trying, stepping back when it didn’t fit, never keeping anyone where they didn’t want to stay.
You knew he wouldn’t care about being reduced to rumor, because he’d said it more than once that people would talk anyway and he didn’t want anyone bleeding on his behalf. Still, childhood loyalty had its own habits. There were lines you wouldn’t let be crossed, even casually, even here.
“I think people confuse brevity with carelessness,” you said, reaching for another snack and nudging the bowl toward Hana as you did. “If a relationship isn’t working, ending it sooner can look messy from the outside, especially when no one’s around for the conversations that come before or after.”
You glanced around the table. Resting your cheek on your palm, your smile widened when you saw Hana looking at you with an apologetic look. The look carried both acknowledgement and embarrassment, the subtle admission that she had overstepped in speaking of someone she didn’t fully know, someone who had meant enough to you to warrant respect.
“And it’s interesting,” you added, tilting your head slightly, “how easy it is to talk about someone when you haven’t actually bothered to see them beyond the image everyone else paints. You can repeat labels and summaries and assume you know the whole story, but it rarely reflects the truth of the person themselves.”
Mina lowered her eyes, biting the inside of her cheek before shaking her head. “God, you’re right. I went ahead of myself with the rush of this conversation… I shouldn’t have said that. Honestly, I wouldn’t feel good if anyone talked about me like that, so I should be more careful.”
“Yeonjun’s always been pretty upfront with people. That tends to get mistaken for a lot of things it isn’t,” you spoke lightly, glancing at Jieun, who had succumbed to slumber halfway through the discussion due to her drunken state.
You didn't feel the necessity to stretch this conversation further. They admitted their fault and you defended your friend. The win was yours. With that settled, you steered the banter back toward lighter topics. Time slipped past unnoticed until the sudden glance at your watch made you realize that midnight was nearly upon you, and Yeonjun was nowhere within your line of sight. His absence tugged at your attention with a strange urgency. You excused yourself, sliding out of the chair and weaving toward the terrace.
Your shoulder bumped lightly against someone. You looked up to find Beomgyu, one of Yeonjun’s old friends, grinning at you. You exchanged a few light pleasantries before you asked with a small furrow of your brow if he had seen Yeonjun, noting that your calls had gone unanswered. Beomgyu’s expression shifted with a slight frown as he recounted that Yeonjun had been at the bar earlier, that he’d seemed fine then, maybe a little too enthusiastic about refills. You thanked him before letting him go to his own circle. Your gaze swept across the room before it landed on the bar tucked along the far wall.
He was there exactly as Beomgyu had said, hunched over the counter with a half-finished glass beside him. The sight nudged a fond exhale out of you as you crossed the remaining distance and took the stool beside him.
“You’re really dead set on making me drive us back, huh?” you asked, observing his reaction.
Yeonjun’s head lifted, his gaze hazy yet catching yours with a slow widening of eyes as though he just realized you were there. The spark in them was dulled by drink but somehow still present, like embers beneath ash
“Oh,” he breathed, the word soft and warm as he leaned closer without thinking, his elbow slipping on the polished surface before he caught himself, “there you are,” then he folded again, cheek pressed to his forearm.
“So much for saying you’d find me,” you mused, eyes glinting as you mirrored his action and let the side of your head rest on your folded arm over the bar.
“Hi, love,” he sweetly drawled, voice thick with the haze of intoxication. He smiled dazedly at you, shifting his head only slightly so he could keep looking at you.
You couldn’t help the small coo of exasperation that slipped out, sitting upright and reaching to rake your fingers through the strands of his hair. “Hi,” you said softly, allowing your tone to mirror the warmth and care threaded through your touch, noting how his eyelids fluttered closed at the contact.
He hummed with the same stupid smile. How much did he drink to be this wasted? You were already counting the ways this night was ending with you behind the wheel. Good thing you had only one glass of wine.
He cracked one eye open, watching you from beneath his lashes before he frowned slightly, squinting at the space between you. “Too far,” he murmured, voice slurring. “Need you closer.”
He reached out, fingers wrapping around the side of your stool and with an easy pull he brought you closer until your knees brushed the edge of the counter and your hip pressed into his side. The lopsided smile returned on his plush, pink lips.
“Mhhm. Better.”
The strength was casual yet intimate that it pulled a catch from your chest you hadn’t anticipated. It occurred to you a second later just how attractive that was. It was messing with your head.
“Jun, let’s go home.” You caressed his cheek. “Yeah?”
But he didn’t seem like he was registering your words.
"Hey," he slurred, but somehow still gentle. "You… you're, uh, you’re so pretty," he continued, blinking at you as though it was the most profound revelation of the night. "Like, you’re so beautiful, you know that?"
You stifled a laugh, amused but also slightly worried as you reached out to straighten the collar of his shirt. You had seen him like this before, but tonight, there was something more raw about it.
“I know,” you teased with a hint of tenderness in your words. “I’m pretty sure you’ve told me before.”
He shook his head, a goofy grin spreading across his face as he sat up again, and leaned toward you, almost tripping over his own feet from the tool. You had to suppress another laugh, but your heart was full watching him act so carefree and so uninhibited.
“No, no,” he argued, shaking his head. “I mean like, really pretty. You’re… you're so pretty, it’s like…” He paused, his brow furrowing as though searching for the right words, but only the most basic thoughts slipped out. “It’s like you’re glowing. Like… an angel or something. I don’t know how anyone can look at you and not… not, like, fall in love with you.”
Your smile locked in place, then faltered, and then slipped away altogether as his words echoed back at you in pieces that refused to arrange themselves into anything sensible. Could he possibly be mistaking you for someone else? Seeing through you instead of at you, that somewhere in the crowd there was another woman he’d confused you for after too many drinks?
But his attention didn’t drift, didn’t waver, didn’t go looking for anyone else. It stayed locked on you.
“You’re drunk.” You aimed for reason, though the end of the sentence softened despite your effort. “You don’t mean that.”
He frowned at you as if you’d spoken a language he didn’t recognize. You watched his expression go pliant, noticed the slight stagger in the way his shoulders adjusted as he tried to keep himself upright on the stool but still gazed at you with such intensity that it made your heart race. His eyes were glossy like he was tearing up at the way you spoke to him.
“No,” he said firmly. “I do mean it. I’m, like… so in love with you, you don’t even know. Like— right here.” He pressed his palm clumsily to his chest, missing the mark and correcting himself with a breathless laugh. “I’m so in love with you, it makes my chest hurt, but in a good way. I can’t even explain it, it’s like… every time I see you, I feel like I’m falling all over again, over and over. It’s so much. I can’t keep it in anymore.”
“You—” you tried, leaning forward instinctively as his balance tipped toward you. Yuo could see the earnestness in his eyes even as they were clouded with alcohol. His breathing was stuttered, bottom lip plush and glistening as his tongue swept across it absentmindedly.
He reached out, clumsily touching your cheek first before finding its place properly. “I don’t care if it sounds stupid,” he muttered, the sentence breaking when he swallowed. “I’m so in love with you. I just... I just want you to know that. I need you to know.”
You had always thought drunken confessions were a convenient excuse for honesty rather than proof of it, because it seemed impossible that anyone could loosen their guard so completely that every carefully tucked-away feeling spilled out all at once, raw and unfiltered and beyond retrieval. You were so wrong. It was unfathomable that your childhood friend, the boy who knew every phase of you and whom you had loved far longer than you ever admitted even to yourself, just laid his heart out to you.
You took a deep breath trying to keep your composure and to remind yourself where you were and who you were being in this moment. But your heart was racing, your stomach doing flips.
“You’re going to regret this in the morning,” you said softly, as you guided his hand away from your face, not pushing it aside but redirecting it to rest against the bar. Your thumb brushed over his knuckles in a gesture meant to steady him more than anything else.
He shook his head like a child. “No. I won’t. I can’t.”
You weren’t going to take advantage of this. This was a topic reserved for when you are both sober and can make decisions for yourselves.
“Well, aren’t you a charmer,” you teased, brushing a stray lock of hair back from his forehead when it slipped into his eyes again. “But I don’t think you’re going to remember a single word of this in the morning. Tell me again when you’re sober, okay?”
He grinned, nodding far too eagerly in agreement. “No way I’ll forget. I’ll tell you again tomorrow, I promise.”
In that moment, you knew that no matter how silly the situation was, it didn’t matter. Because in his eyes, in the vulnerable honesty of his words, you could see the truth. And you would hold onto that, even if it was a little messy, a little imperfect. Even if it was drunk.
By the time you pulled into the driveway, Yeonjun had gone pliant in the passenger seat with his head tipped awkwardly toward the window. It told you sleep had already taken him halfway. You killed the engine, sat for a moment to let the silence settle, then reached for your phone and called Joonho downstairs.
Getting him inside took coordination more than strength. You wondered how Joonho carried him on his back because the latter was much bigger than him. You were grateful he still managed to do it. You followed close behind, peeling off Yeonjun’s shoes and tugging his socks loose, gathering what you could before they became obstacles. Once you were thoroughly satisfied that he was comfortable in his bed, you allowed yourself a final glance at his face before gently closing the door behind you. You decided to take the couch for tonight.
When Joonho was about to leave for his room, you called his name. “About me and Yeonjun… well,” you started, faltering as you searched for a clean way through the mess in your head.
Joonho turned slowly, watching you with far too much patience. “Did he…?” he prompted, leaving the rest open for you to fill in.
You narrowed your eyes at him, exhaustion sharpening your voice. “You knew?”
His grin was unapologetic, wide, and entirely too pleased. It answered everything.
In a way you were glad you didn’t have to explain everything from the beginning. Turned out, Joonho had always been watching the two of you dancing around each other in ways that weren’t only just visible to the two of you. His satisfaction at finally hearing you admit it was truly a sight to see. Over a bottle of wine, the two of you talked.
You went to sleep that night feeling oddly settled, your doubts dulled by Joonho’s reassurance and the simple relief of having said it to someone out loud. You couldn't say the same thing for Yeonjun though. Because early in the morning, you had to leave for your place to oversee the renovation work in person, trusting Joonho to handle Yeonjun’s inevitable hangover.
You wouldn’t be meeting Yeonjun until night. The knowledge followed you through the latter half of the day like a tenacious hum in your mind, growing louder with every passing hour of the year-end closing shift. By the time you finally clocked out and stepped into the evening air, the nervous energy had settled so deeply into you that it felt almost juvenile, a jittery awareness that made you scoff at yourself for feeling like a teenager again when you had lived so much more life than that.
The text from Joonho arrived just as you were merging onto the road home, announcing he wouldn’t be back until morning, capped with a teasing line about doing whatever you two wanted in the empty house. Having the place to yourselves should not have made your pulse kick the way it did (yet it did) and you exhaled through a short laugh that did nothing to calm the way your fingers tightened briefly around the steering wheel.
The apartment lights were on when you arrived. You toed off your shoes and followed the sounds of movement into the kitchen, where Yeonjun stood by the counter as he reheated dinner he clearly hadn’t eaten. He startled when he noticed you, bumping against the counter and reaching too quickly for a glass.
“Oh—you’re home,” he stuttered as he filled it with water before setting it down between you without lifting his eyes. “You must be starving! I, um—I didn’t know what you’d want, so I just—there’s food, if you’re hungry. Or we can—you don’t have to eat now. I mean. Later is fine too.”
He glanced toward you, then immediately back to what he was doing. The counter between you a narrow barrier that felt intentional even if neither of you had named it. You reached for the glass he’d offered, watching how his gaze fixed stubbornly on the microwave timer instead of your face.
“You’re awfully bad at keeping promises,” you said lightly as you took a sip.
It was meant as an airy remark to gauge his reaction. You smiled into the rim of the glass because you were already certain, from the way his shoulders tightened, that he remembered last night in full.
The silence was punctuated by the low hum of the microwave which suddenly felt too loud. Yeonjun exhaled hard as he rubbed a hand over the back of his neck, finally glancing your way before dropping his eyes again.
“Sorry, I, uh—” he started at once, turning the apology over itself before it could land properly. “I drank way too much. I shouldn’t have disappeared like that, and you had to come find me, and then you drove us back when it should’ve been me—I swear I didn’t plan to—” He stopped, swallowing, voice lowering as if he were afraid of the next part even existing out loud. “I… must’ve said something. Last night.”
You nodded slowly, appearing composed on the surface but inside you were folding in on yourself because there was no artifice in him at all — just this tall, capable man suddenly reduced to nervous hands and a voice that kept tripping over itself.
His restlessness mellowed out the jitter buzzing under your skin, smoothed it down into something more daring. You felt the urge to poke at him gently, to test how much space there was for play between the two of you now. You almost did, but you held yourself back when you noticed the way he still kept refusing to meet your eyes.
“I didn’t mean to put that on you,” he said, shaking his head as if he was disappointed in himself. “I know it wasn’t fair, especially like that. If I crossed a line—”
“You didn’t,” you cut in gently. “You didn’t do anything wrong. But I’m not going to talk about it unless you’re sure you want to.”
You had waited before. You could wait again. You would not chase what hadn’t been chosen — even if every part of you hoped he would turn around on his own.
The smile you offered him was soft and open, assuring him that you meant what you said, and with that you moved around the island. You intended to give him space, to let him breathe, to let the moment pass if it needed to.
You barely made it a step past him before his hand closed around your wrist.
“I meant every single word I said.”
He didn’t face you.
A shiver ran across you at the sound of his voice pitched lower like that, starting at your shoulders and spreading down your arms. Your breath left you in a controlled exhale though your heart had started misbehaving entirely.
“Then look at me,” you said gently.
A soft instruction rather than a demand — one he ignored by keeping his gaze fixed ahead and his shoulders only lifted with a shallow breath. You stepped closer, lifting your free hand to his face, your fingers fitting along his jaw. You guided him toward you without force, your thumb brushing his cheekbone.
“Do you remember,” you began, keeping your voice light as your fingers slipped into his hair, “how I told you last night that you’d have to say it again when you were sober?” You traced the shell of his ear as you spoke, basking in the small hitches of breath he gave you at the contact.
His hand slid to the small arch of your spine, drawing you closer until the space between you narrowed and the sudden proximity sent a sharp jolt through you that you refused to retreat from. You tipped your chin up, meeting him with a calm smile that took effort you didn’t show, even as your pulse skittered under his touch.
Yeonjun let himself look at you properly instead of just fleeting glances. Your heart soared because the same earnest intensity you had seen the night before was there again swirling in his orbs — and this time — stripped of any alcohol. His hands settled at your waist, thumbs pressing in as he closed his eyes for a brief second.
“I love you,” he said, voice gravelly from raw honesty. “It’s been so long since I started loving you that I don’t even remember when it began. All I can tell is that I’ve never stopped loving you.”
Damn his foolish heart for betraying him so openly by letting his gaze be drawn again and again to the soft curvature of your mouth. Fractured thoughts scattering in every direction at once, his mind cycled through each possibility and tallied the ways he could have misunderstood the way you looked at him tonight. Every glance from years past suddenly rushed forward to stand trial alongside this one.
Regardless, your words of assurance came back to him. You had asked him to say it again when he wasn’t drunk, had asked him to stand by it with a clear head and an even voice, and that had to count for something, didn’t it? There was no sense in punishing himself for finally doing the one thing he had always done too late. If all you were asking for was truth, and if all he could offer was himself, then he would do that much at least, even if the thought of losing you after this frightened him more than silence ever had.
Maybe honesty, once finally spoken, deserves to stand without apology.
You, meanwhile, felt warmth spreading through your limbs until it left you lightheaded, buoyed by a feeling that bordered on giddy. A soft laugh escaped as you let your forehead fall against his chest, your hands abandoning his face to curl around his neck instead. You felt Yeonjun shudder above you as he quietly said your name. That made you stare up at him.
“What took you so long, hm?” you said at last with a rueful smile, before you shook your head at yourself and corrected course mid‑thought, your fingers flexing lightly at the nape of his neck. “No—no, that’s not fair. I shouldn’t say that to you. This isn’t on you. If anything, I should’ve been honest sooner. Maybe then we wouldn’t be standing here now, years late to our own conversation. I chose not to want you. I was—”
“Scared,” Yeonjun softly finished your sentence, speaking for the both of you.
You nodded. “But I was wrong.”
You fought the urge to playfully jab him in the ribs when you saw his signature sly smirk appearing slowly in his lips. His eyes, once pouring with so much rawness, narrowed slightly but nonetheless still held the rawness. There was just a spark of heat in them now.
“‘Wrong’ how?” he leaned in until the space between you thinned to breath and heat, his words brushing your mouth more than reaching your ears. “I need you to be more honest with me here, love,” he added, gaze flicking once to your lips before lifting again.
You let out a short scoff and tipped your head back a fraction, denying him the closeness while keeping his attention exactly where it already was. “I wouldn’t be here with you if I didn’t want this too,” you replied. “And I wouldn’t have asked you to tell me you loved me when you were sober if I hadn’t meant it.”
His chest gave a quick thrum — a reminder that it had never learned restraint where you were concerned. Yeonjun followed to fill the gap you created, stepping forward until the counter met the back of your hips. He set both palms against the surface on either side of you, lowering his head to be eye level with you. His presence eclipsed everything else.
“Please, tell me before I lose my mind,” he rasped. “Because—oh God—I’ve been holding myself back for so long.”
Your teeth caught your lower lip as you considered just how much more you could push before it became unfair. You had tortured him enough. Your hands — one slid down his chest, fingers spreading over his sternum, the other finding its way back to his face and cupping his cheek as you guided him closer.
“I love you, Yeonjun,” you said, every word chosen and owned. “I always have.”
His lips were softer than anything you've ever known. It's soft like the first snow, like biting into cotton candy, like melting and floating and being weightless in water. It was sweet, so devastatingly sweet and it bloomed until your senses were overwhelmed.
He pulled back sooner than you were ready for and you chased the space without thinking. Your fingers curled into the fabric at his shoulders as a small sound slipped from you, breathless and needy in a way that made him shudder as if he’d felt it in his bones.
“You have no idea how many times I talked myself out of this,” he said, voice low and rough as his forehead brushed yours, his thumb tracing along your jaw before slipping beneath your chin, tilting your face up again because he needed to see your eyes while saying it.
You laughed breathlessly and tugged him closer, forcing him to feel how little space there was left to negotiate. “You don’t look like someone who’s been holding back,” you replied, tipping your head just enough to brush your nose against his, stealing the air he’d been breathing.
He chuckled, the sound barely there before you pulled him back in and this time there was nothing cautious about it. You had never gotten so lost in a kiss before. Your heart kept tripping over itself as your fingers dragged him closer, closer, still not close enough. You had loved before but it didn’t feel like this. You had kissed before but it didn’t burn you alive. It left you flushed and dizzy and wanting more.
Yeonjun’s hand slid into your hair, fingers spreading at your scalp as he tipped your head back, deepening the kiss until your breath caught. His other arm wrapped around you and lifted you without warning, setting you on the counter as he stepped in between your thighs. You hooked your legs around his hips, pulling him closer as his mouth worked yours with growing insistence. You found yourself gasping for breath, whimpering when he bit your bottom lip as his other hand braced beside you.
The haze of sensation left your vision swimming, every nerve alive as his fingers slipped under your shirt, tracing the heated planes of your skin, teasing, exploring, igniting sparks that sent heat skittering through you. He pulled back only slightly before pressing a chaste kiss to your lips.
"Sometimes, all I can think about is this—us like this, you in my arms. Underneath me, too." His lips brushed yours again, then he exhaled. “No—forget that. You deserve more respect than that. I just… I haven’t been able to stop myself from wanting it.”
You smiled at that, resting one arm across his shoulder while your other raked through his hair. You tilted your head and hummed.
“What else do you wanna do?” you asked, voice dipping.
He pretended to ponder as he narrowed his eyes, gaze flicking away before returning to you with a smirk. “Take you to dinner after this,” he said, hand shifting on your waist, drawing you closer. “Do things in the proper order for once.”
“Mmm,” you replied, rolling your hips forward just enough to press yourself against him, watching the way his breath hitched. “And then?”
He straightened slightly, lips curving as he leaned in to press a brief kiss to your forehead. “Then we get dessert.”
“We’ve never waited for dinner to get dessert,” you murmured, the challenge clear as you grinded against him again, smiling when his inhale went sharp and his hand slid down to your thigh, fingers pressing into your skin.
“You’re going to ruin me,” he said, a rough laugh in his voice as his grip tightened. “I had a very stable life before you moved in.”
“Ah,” you sighed, feigning a forlorn expression as your hand slid across his chest. “Then maybe we should stop. Let you go back to that stable life while I go to slee—waoh!”
Laughter erupted from you when he deftly lifted you up and carried you to his room. His mouth never straying from yours even as you both fell onto the bed in a disordered sprawl, the frame creaking softly beneath the sudden movement while his lips slipped from yours only to trail wet kisses down your jaw and throat, sucking and biting until your skin was a canvas of his marks. It sent shivers shooting down your whole body, your hips bucking. He settled between your legs and you felt the solid presence of him there pinning you to the mattress.
His hands slid up your thighs and under your skirt. You moaned against his lips when he massaged the flesh there as he pulled back to stare down into your face while lifting the material, leaving a trail of goosebumps all the way up your thighs. You felt yourself clench around air, a sharp pulse of need in your core. Your hunger stripped everything down to sensation, and it felt dangerously good to stop resisting it.
His lips were swollen and damp when he paused. “You want this, right?”
Your breath came uneven as you swallowed. You had never been more sure of anything in your life. With a shaky laugh you nod, unbuttoning your dress shirt with a wolfish smile.
He tongued his cheek at the sight of your black lacy bra and your expression, hands already reaching for his own clothes. He pulled his shirt over his head in one motion, muscle shifting under skin as he tossed it aside. You were on him immediately which he happily complied, wasting no time clashing his mouth against yours. Your hands were all over his torrid naked skin, touching and grabbing every inch of skin they could access.
Your back arched as you broke the kiss with a moan when he slipped one hand underneath your bra and kneaded the mound of your breast. The barrier was making him impatient so he quickly worked with the clasp of your bra and flung it somewhere over his shoulder before greedily taking one perky nipple in his mouth.
Your hand tangled in his hair as he sucked and nipped on your skin, the other hand busy where it rolled and pinched the other nipple in between his fingers. You felt like you could cum alone from nipple stimulation because holy shit he was so good at whatever he was doing. His growing hardness pressed insistently in between you, and you sought friction by trying to grind up against him.
“Please, Yeonjun,” you breathed, the plea tugged loose as your hands tightened in his hair, pulling him closer even as your back arched toward him.
He looked up at you through his lashes, releasing your nipple with a pop and grinned deviously. “I know, baby.” A quiet laugh brushed against your skin as he shifted, one knee nudging your thighs apart, his hand sliding lower to cup you through the thin barrier of fabric. His mouth returned to your throat as he spoke, words punctuated by the drag of his lips. “Need me here badly? I can feel how bad you want me.”
If you were in the right mind right now and not overcome by lust, you would have swiped that smirk off his face with a punch or some snarky remarks to reclaim a little pride. But all you could do was nod and do whatever to make him give you what you wanted. You tugged your skirt down your legs which had hiked up your waist earlier, and was about to tug your panties down too. You didn’t get far. His hand closed around your wrist and stilled you.
“Not yet.” His tone dimmed as he sat back on his heels. Gaze tracked you in a way that made you squirm like he’d decided to take his time and wanted you to feel every second of it.
Goosebumps travelled up your skin as you raised your eyebrows at him, wondering what he was waiting for. You bit your lip with hitched breaths when he thumbed your cunt over your panties, tracing over the slick dampness. He worked on his pants with the other hand, pulling out his hardened cock. Your body felt another rush of heat roll over when you took him in — long and veiny, a pool of pre cum already gathering at the tip. He gave himself a few lazy pumps with the same rhythm as he stroked you, brows furrowed with the sensation as a low groan slipped out.
“Didn't know you were a tease in bed, Jun,” you breathed out with a laugh, feeling yourself getting wetter as more slick gushed out.
He let out a throaty chuckle before kicking his pants off and climbing back over you, eager to kiss you again. “You have no idea,” he whispered against your mouth.
He greedily took in your moans when he pressed his leaking tip against your clothed cunt — a delicious friction that sent shockwaves of pleasure through your core. Each grind pushed the tip, the soaked cotton yielding just enough to let him tease the entrance of your aching pussy, but not enough to grant full access — leaving you teetering on the edge of frustration and ecstasy.
"God, you're so fucking hot," he teasingly groaned against your ear that sent shivers down your spine.
Whimpering, you looked down at the place but he held your jaw and made your face tilt back up to kiss you again. Your body arched instinctively to press harder against him, the subtle drag of the panties creating a tantalizing burn that heightened every nerve. Yeonjun's grip on your jaw softened, his thumb brushing tenderly over your lower lip.
You bit your lip, the words tumbling out in a breathless rush, "I want you inside me, Yeonjun—please, I need it so bad."
At your unabashed confession, Yeonjun gave one little cheeky grin before finally hooking a finger into the edge of your panties to pull them off. The sudden exposure sent a rush of cool air over your swollen, dripping pussy, making you gasp as his cock slid fully against your bare entrance, the tip teasing your opening and agonizingly bumping into your clit.
You got up, pushing him back to sit down as you climbed on his lap and claimed his mouth in a searing kiss. You nipped at his lower lip, sucking it gently between your teeth before plunging back in, the filthy slide of saliva mingling as you lost yourself in the sensation of his taste.
"Fuck, you're dripping for me," he let out a prolonged groan, his fingers sliding through your sopping folds.
He pushed two digits inside of you with ease and you sighed at the stretch. His fingers curled inside you with a slow rhythm, each thrust sending waves of pleasure that made your inner walls clench around him. You rocked your hips, grinding against his hand as his thumb brushed over your swollen clit, drawing out gasps that echoed in the dim room. Every breath you took was ragged, your skin flushed and slick with a light sheen of sweat.
Yeonjun's dark eyes locked onto yours, his free hand sliding up your back to tangle in your hair, pulling you closer until your foreheads pressed together. "That's it, love," he murmured against your lips, his voice a low rumble that vibrated through you, heightening the delicious friction as his fingers stretched and stroked your depths.
Through the haze of heady ecstasy, you looked down at him only to have your chest warm up. There was so much awe and love in his eyes. His devotion ran deeper for you than you could imagine.
You reached down to wrap your hand around his cock, pumping him. Yeonjun's breath hitched, a deep groan escaping his lips that mingled with your own soft whimpers. As the intensity built, your free hand clutched at his shoulder, nails digging in just enough to elicit another low growl from him. His cock twitched in your hand as he thrusted harder against you. The veins on his shaft stood out prominently against the backdrop of smooth skin slicked with precum and sweat. You could feel every ridge and pulse as you worked him with increasing fervor.
But you didn’t want to cum just yet like this and neither did you want him to finish so soon, despite already dying to taste him. You released him before pushing his hand away from inside you.
You gave a breathless laugh when Yeonjun put his fingers in his mouth, pinning you with his gaze as he licked them clean. You lifted yourself up, knees sinking into the soft mattress on either side of his hips and aligned his cock with your slit. The thick, rigid length of him slid into you with a wet squelch, stretching your swollen folds wide as you sank down.
“Oh, fuck, y-you’re going to have to help me. Too, too tight,” you hissed, feeling waves of warmth travelling all over your body.
Yeonjun grunted as his hands found purchase on your hips, his grip tight and it felt so fucking good. You knew they’d be leaving bruises. Despite all the nudging and the rampant lubrication of your pussy, it still took a full minute, probably longer, to work his entire length inside of your tightness that made your thighs tremble, but you didn't stop there.
With a shared, heated glance, you wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him closer and giving him easy access to thrust up on you, making you let out a high pitched whimper. Once Yeonjun was finally seated deep inside you, a shared sigh of relief and laughter escaped your lips, the stretch bordering on overwhelming but laced with a delicious ache that made your toes curl.
“My angel,” Yeonjun choked on his words as he ran his hands over your back, soothing you. “I love you so, so much—and I don’t know how I went this long without saying it out loud.”
You closed your eyes shut, head falling on his shoulders as countless tremors went through your body at his size. “Hah, it really did take you being drunk to finally say it,” you said between breaths.
He grinned, but it was a little lopsided, like he couldn’t quite hold himself together. "Yeah, but I'm glad I finally did. And I promise, I’m not gonna screw this up. I won’t. I’ll take care of you. I’ll always take care of you. No matter what."
You lifted your head up to return his smile, before leaning in to a kiss. His lips moved languidly with yours, tongue poking out to lick against yours. His hands wrapped over your back, drawing you flush against his chest, your breasts pressing into the firm planes of his chest. Your hands clutched at his broad shoulders, nails digging into the warm, sweat-slicked skin as you whimpered into his mouth, the kiss deepening with a raw hunger that mirrored the way his body claimed yours.
"You alright?" he whispered, his voice a husky mix of concern and desire that sent a shiver down your spine. You nodded, biting your lip to stifle a moan, and he added softly, "I got you."
His hands gripped your ass firmly then, fingers digging into the soft flesh as he began to guide your hips in a slow pace, lifting and lowering you with effortless strength. Each upward thrust drove him deeper, the friction building into a fiery crescendo that had you both groaning — his low, guttural sounds vibrating through your joined bodies, while yours escaped as breathless gasps.
You could feel the veins of his cock pulsing and the heat of him seeping into you, making your inner walls clench in desperation for more. His breath was hot against your neck, a ragged rhythm that matched the frantic beat of your heart as he continued his torturous grind.
With a low growl, he eased you backward, his strong arms supporting you as he laid you down on the bed. Yeonjun paused for a heartbeat, savoring the sight of you laid out before him — body flushed with sweat, boobs lightly swaying with every rise and fall of your breath, eyes half lidded and glossy that matched your glistening pussy. His hands slid up to cup your breasts, thumbs teasing your nipples as he began to move again, thrusts growing more purposeful. You were so lost in the blissful haze of pleasure coursing through you that the sudden wave of coldness and emptiness startled you; Yeonjun pulling out his entirety out of you, making you whine to get back the feeling of his warmth.
Without warning, Yeonjun's strong hands gripped your waist, flipping you over, rolling you off your back and onto your stomach. The sudden shift left you disoriented, a jolt of surprise flashing across your face as you glanced back at him over your shoulder.
Gripping himself, he swiped the head of himself through your sticky folds, bumping your clit to slide back down to your center and it once again made you whine. The cool sheets pressed against your heated skin, a stark contrast to the warmth of his body hovering above you, his knees straddling your thighs to pin you in place. You felt his hard cock sliding along the curve of your ass before he positioned himself, the tip nudging at your slick entrance once more.
“Yeonj—hnngf!”
With one easy thrust he entered you again, deeper this time, the angle pressing him against your most sensitive spots in a way that had you seeing stars. Yeonjun let out a low whine, his body collapsing slightly as he rested his head between your shoulder blades, his hot breath fanning across your skin like a branding iron.
"Fuck, you're gonna make me cum already," he choked out.
You tried to respond, but all that escaped was a breathy moan.
The prone position amplified every sensation, his body molding to yours as he lay partially over you, his chest brushing against your back with each shallow thrust. Your pussy clenched around him, the tight confines of your body gripping his thick length as he drove in and out, the friction building with an exquisite pressure that bordered on overwhelming.
He was so fucking deep inside you, rubbing against all of your deepest nerves. His moans and whines were music to your ears, his hot breaths came in ragged huffs tickling the nape of your neck, while his hands roamed possessively — one sliding under your hips to tilt them just right, the other threading through your hair to expose more of your skin to his lips.
Yeonjun's thrusts grew more urgent but they carried a tenderness too. His lips pressing soft kisses along your shoulder, whispering praises that made you feel cherished amidst the raw desire — how perfectly you fit him, how your body responded to his like it was made for him. Your fingers clawed at the sheets, the building pressure inside you coiling tighter with every deep pump of his hips.
You croaked out his name—"Yeonjun"—as your orgasm crashed over you like a tidal wave, your walls spasming wildly around him, milking his length with uncontrollable pulses. He faltered then, his pace stuttering into erratic thrusts, a guttural groan escaping him as he buried his face deeper into the nape of your neck. Your gasps and moans fell like waterfall into the mattress as he drove you into it.
Sensing his restraint crumbling, he managed to gasp out, "Can't hold it back, love." His voice breaking with the effort, his hands trembling on your waist.
The plea in his words ignited a final surge of desire in you. "Come inside." The command breathlessly slipped from your lips as you craned your neck to look at him.
Perhaps it was the aphrodisiac and fucked out look in your eyes that made him surrender, his cock pulsing as he emptied himself deep into you, hot ropes of cum flooding your sensitive pussy. You felt every twitch, every warm rush, as it mingled with your own lingering aftershocks, leaving you both shuddering in the quiet aftermath.
Both of you stayed unmoving for a few seconds before Yeonjun eased himself out of you, his breath still coming in ragged gasps that matched the rise and fall of your back beneath him. Your spent pussy clenched slightly as he withdrew, a warm gush of his cum leaking out, glistening on your flushed skin and soaking into the fabric below.
He rolled onto his side, propping himself up on one elbow to gaze at you. The moment rolled strangely after, breath still uneven between you as your eyes met in startled disbelief, and then whatever tension remained cracked open into soft, breathless laughter that shook through both of you. He reached out, pulling you into his arms as you nestled against him. Your lips met in a deep, lingering kiss, tasting the salt of your exertion, your tongue brushing his with a tenderness that made his heart swell.
You pulled back slightly, your cheeks flushed, and began to whisper, "That was so—" but the words dissolved into another fit of giggles, your head shaking as if the sheer intensity defied description, your fingers tracing lazy circles on his back.
Yeonjun silenced your laughter with another soft kiss, his hand cradling the nape of your neck, feeling the rapid beat of your pulse under his thumb. "Let's take a bath," he murmured against your lips, his voice low and soothing. "I'll clean you up."
The lukewarmness of the water wrapped around you both later. You guided him to sit on the edge of the tub while the water warmed, steam climbing the air and settling against your skin until the aches in your body began to loosen. He watched you with damp lashes and a softened smile, palms braced behind him as you tested the water, then turned the tap down a fraction and nodded to yourself.
When he reached for the shampoo you caught his wrist and shook your head with a small smile as you took the bottle from him. “Sit,” you said, guiding him back with a press to his shoulder, and he let you without question. You worked the lather through his hair, thumbs circling his scalp until his eyes slid shut and his shoulders dropped.
You followed with soap, careful hands moving over his back and arms, rinsing him clean while water splashed against porcelain. Your fingers combed through his hair again and again, traced paths along his back and chest, kissing warm skin whenever the impulse struck. You spent long minutes on motions that served no purpose other than letting him feel held.
By the time you were done, his breathing had slowed, but his chest rose sharply once as he laughed under it, sounding close to tears instead. You frowned, kneeling immediately in between his knees to look at him. He pressed his forehead to yours, eyes glassy as he blinked hard.
“I’ve never had anyone treat me like this,” he said, one hand cupping your face. “You know that I’m… not used to feeling like this, right? The people I’ve been with before were distant, and for the longest time I thought that was just how it was supposed to be. Until I started loving you.”
Your arms slipped around his middle, cheek resting on his shoulder letting the water run while you held him there. “I know,” you said softly, squeezing him just a little tighter. “And I promise you’re not going to feel like that with me. You deserve to be loved properly, Yeonjun, and I mean it when I say I’m all in—starting with making sure you never spend thirty thousand on five chillies again.”
His laughter broke through the tenderness as his smile softened into something fond and open. “Yeah,” he said, brushing his thumb along your cheek, eyes bright as he nodded. “Yeah, I think I’d like that.”
True that there had never been any childhood pinky promises between the two of you, no naive vows whispered under desks to look back on. But as you stayed there together, you couldn’t bring yourself to regret the time it had taken to arrive here because the absence of those clichés hadn’t taken him away from you. Some stories didn’t need an early beginning to arrive where they belonged.
And god, you were never going to let Yeonjun feel alone or unloved again — not after everything he had already given to people who never knew how to hold him.
I read somewhere that biologically we evolved from being hunters and night guards. Those who have their body clocks active during the day are the hunters, so at night they need to rest and thus the night guards, those who are the nocturnals, stay up until dawn to watch over the hunters.
synopsis:the girl soobin has wanted since forever is dating the campus resident playboy. desperate, hopeless, and out of ideas, he comes to you—a shaman who supposedly specialises in love rituals and spiritual compatibility. only problem? you’re a total fraud.
ᥫ᭡ pairing: yearner!choi soobin x scammer shaman!reader
ᥫ᭡ genre/warnings: college au, romcom, coming of age, crack, e2l, spin-off, explicit language, sexual humour & crude jokes, drug use, alcohol use, manipulation/deception, emotional distress, bit of angst, pining, slow burn, jealousy, plotting against your fav freaky couple, 18+ mdni, second-hand embarrassment, so unhinged turn your brain off
ᥫ᭡ status: ongoing
ᥫ᭡ wc: 10k
ᥫ᭡ playlist | series masterlist | main masterlist | prequel | banner
part one | the slicker ᥫ᭡
Your phone buzzes with a low balance notification and you flip it face-down like that’ll fix it.
The back room stinks. You’re twenty-one and your life is being held together by incense and vibes. The candle you lit an hour ago is tunnelling down the middle because you bought the cheap ones again. The fairy lights flicker whenever the washing machine spins, which feels personal, because you don’t even have the dignity of stable electricity. The curtain you pinned up to hide the washing machine is sagging on one side.
You keep telling yourself it’s intentional. It isn’t.
You sit behind your folding table—one leg shorter than the others—trying to make the wobble look like atmosphere. There’s a bowl of rice on your right, tarot decks stacked on your left. A notebook with CLIENT NOTES on the front that’s ninety percent doodles and unpaid invoices. Your incense burner coughs out smoke in lazy little bursts.
You’re supposed to be closed. The doorbell rings anyway. A long press that says whoever is outside thinks that the world should open its legs for them.
You don’t move at first. You just stare at the bowl of rice and consider becoming a different person—one with a proper job and morals.
The doorbell rings again.
“Alright,” you mutter, dragging yourself up. “Keep your fucking hair on.”
You pad down the short hall, stepping over a parcel you haven’t opened because it might be a bill in disguise, and yank the door open.
He’s standing there like he’s been dropped off by a private school.
Tall. Clean. Denim jacket too crisp for winter. Hair soft and floppy and annoyingly nice. His face is unfair—pretty in a way that says he never had to survive on adrenaline and paracetamol. He smells of money, too—clean laundry and subtle cologne.
And he’s holding an envelope—a thick one. You don’t even pretend you’re above it. Hunger’s not shameful, it’s just inconvenient.
He clears his throat. “Hi. Sorry—um—”
You cut him off. “If you’re here to convert me to some new religion or sell me broadband, I’m going to bite you.”
His eyes widen, startled. He blinks, buffering. “No—no. I’m not. I’m here for—” He glances down at the business card he’s holding, not trusting his own memory. “For the—sh-shaman.”
You lean on the doorframe. “That’s me.”
His eyes widen a fraction, then he schools his expression. “Oh.”
“What?” you say, already irritated. “Expected incense and chanting? Expected an old woman with a crystal ball and a warning about your bloodline?”
“I didn’t—” He flushes, quick. “No. I just—hi.”
“Hi,” you echo, deadpan. “You gonna stand on my doorstep all day or are you coming in?”
He hesitates, then steps forward, clutching the envelope so hard it creases at the corners. His gaze flicks past you, taking in the hallway—shoe rack overflowing, recycling piled in the corner, a dead plant you keep on the windowsill—and his polite face cracks for half a second into surprise.
You catch it. “What?” you snap.
“Nothing,” he says too fast. “Sorry.”
“Shoes off,” you tell him, pointing.
He pauses. “Oh—right.”
He takes his trainers off and lines them up neatly, toe to heel, like he’s at his mum’s house. You hate him a bit more for it. Not because it’s wrong—because it’s him.
You turn and walk him toward the back room. He follows with careful steps, shoulders slightly tense, as if he expects a spirit to jump him in the hallway. You don’t look back, you don’t need to—you can feel the rich-boy caution rolling off him, the kind that says he’s never been in a place where people don’t perform politeness.
You pull the curtain aside and gesture him in.
He stops just inside and takes the room in properly—folding table, rice bowl, fairy lights, the curtain hiding the washing machine, incense smoke crawling up the wall, a tiny space heater in the corner because the radiator is as useless as your degree.
“This is—” he starts again.
“My studio,” you say. “Sit down before you start narrating your shock out loud.”
He lowers himself onto the cushion opposite the table, posture straight. He tucks in his knees slightly, trying to take up less space. The envelope is placed on his lap, fingers still clutched tightly around it. You clock the tension. When he shifts, you also clock the expensive watch peeking out from his sleeve.
Your stomach turns in the familiar way it does around money—the sharp awareness that you live in two different worlds and his one has softer landings.
You drop into your chair and kick the table leg lightly with your foot until the wobble stops. Professional. “Name,” you say.
He swallows. “Choi Soobin.”
“Course it is,” you mumble, because you’ve never met a Soobin who wasn’t tragic. Your eyes flick over his face. “You look like you’ve come back from a fancy year abroad and realised life didn’t magically sort itself out just because you saw mountains.”
His brows lift, offended on instinct. “I—how do you—”
You hold up a hand. “Don’t. If you start asking me how do you know questions, I’m going to charge you extra.”
His mouth twitches. He hesitates, then clears his throat.
“It’s a consultation,” you add, tapping the table. “Talk.”
He nudges the envelope onto the table, sliding it toward you with both hands, offering tribute. “I was told you could help me with a—r-ritual. Or a talisman. Something love-related.”
“Love-related,” you repeat. “God, you lot talk like you’re booking a dentist appointment.”
He frowns. “You’re rude.”
“And you’re paying me,” you fire back, leaning in. “So either you’ve got a humiliation kink or you’re desperate.”
His cheeks go red. “I’m not—”
“Desperate,” you say, nodding. “Got it. Who’s upset you?”
His jaw tightens. There it is, the crack under all the politeness. “It’s not like that.”
You gesture at the rice bowl. “Mate, you walked into a stranger’s flat with a fat envelope asking for a love ritual. It’s exactly like that.”
He glances at the bowl, frowns, then looks back up. “Are you going to use that?”
“Depends on how annoying you are,” you say.
He sits up straighter. “I’m not annoying.”
You snort. “You’re already annoying and you’ve said about twelve words. Continue.”
He inhales, visibly trying to keep his voice steady. “There’s a girl,” he begins, and you can hear him hating himself for matching the script of every sad man you’ve ever scammed. “I’ve liked her for years. We started talking properly a few months ago. Like—every day. It felt—r-real. And then she met someone else.”
You don’t let your face change. You’ve seen heartbreak in every flavour—snotty, dramatic, smug, pathetic. Soobin’s is the worst kind: quiet, polite, trying not to spill in public.
“Right,” you say. “And you want me to do what? Rip her away from the other guy with my magical rice?”
His mouth twitches again; he wants to laugh, but he’s not sure if laughter is allowed in a shaman’s studio. “I just want a—a chance.”
“That’s embarrassing,” you tell him immediately, allergic to sincerity.
His eyes sharpen, hurt flashing. “Excuse me?”
“It’s embarrassing,” you repeat. “That you’ve waited years and now you’re here paying for destiny because you still can’t say what you want to her face.”
His throat works, gaze dropping to his hands. “I did ask her out.”
“Did you?” you say, unimpressed. “Or did you send a polite little message and hope the universe did the rest?”
He goes still, jaw clenching. “I asked her.”
“And?”
“And she said yes,” he says, voice flat. “Then she—she left.”
You pause. “She left?”
He nods once, tight. “During the date.”
“Fuck me,” you mutter, genuine for the first time. “That’s brutal.”
He flinches at your vocabulary. You clock it and grin. “Oh, you’re one of those.”
“One of what?” he snaps, finally showing teeth.
“One of those posh boys who think swearing is a personality flaw,” you say, delighted. “I could have so much fun ruining you.”
His ears go bright red. “I’m not posh.”
You lift a brow and look pointedly at his jacket, his watch, the envelope, the whole vibe. “Yeah, sure.”
He exhales, frustrated. “Can you help me or not?”
There we go—the spine and pulse under all that good-boy packaging. You reach for the bowl of rice with a sigh, all the enthusiasm of charity work. “Fine. Hold still.”
He falters. “What are you doing?”
“Diagnosis,” you say. “Shut up.”
You scoop a handful of rice and throw it at his chest. The grains bounce off his denim and stick to the fabric, a few landing in his hair. He jerks, eyes wide, hands frozen mid-air—unsure whether touching the rice will get him cursed. His whole body screams I have never been in a situation like this in my life.
“Is this—uhm—normal?”
“No,” you say. “But neither is paying a stranger to fix your love life, so let’s not start demanding normal now.”
He goes still again, breathing shallow. “Okay.”
You lean forward, squinting at his shoulder, pretending to look at some spectral shit. You stand up and circle him once—slow enough to make him uncomfortable—then click your tongue in disappointment. “Yeah,” you say. “Now it makes sense.”
His eyes widen. “What does?”
You drop your voice. “There’s a virgin ghost attached to your back.”
Silence.
Soobin’s mouth parts. He keeps checking over his shoulder, checking you, then checking over his shoulder again—determined to spot the ghost without fully turning around. “A—w-what?” he whispers.
“A virgin ghost,” you repeat, nodding with full confidence. “She’s clinging on. Blocking your love energy. That’s why you’re getting dumped mid-date.”
His throat bobs. “How—how do you know that?”
You smile. “Because you’re giving off tragic, untouched, emotionally constipated energy.”
His face goes scarlet. “That’s not—”
And because my mate at the bar basically spoon-fed me your entire sob story, you think, but you don’t say it, because you’re not stupid. You’re a scammer. There’s a difference.
Instead you tilt your head, all calm confidence. “I’m a shaman,” you say. “This is what I do best.”
He stares at you, genuinely horrified, then looks down at the rice on his clothes, waiting for it to do something supernatural.
“So,” you continue, grabbing your notebook and scribbling absolute nonsense—circles, lines, something that looks ancient if you don’t stare too hard—“tell me about her.”
Soobin’s jaw tightens. “I’m not telling you her name.”
“Alright,” you say. “I’ll call her Soobin’s Problem.”
He looks ready to argue, then thinks better of it. He’s in your flat, you’ve got rice within arm’s reach, and your patience is clearly optional. He swallows it down. “She’s—important.”
“Obviously,” you say. “She’s got you sat here with rice in your hair.”
He reaches up, finally plucks a grain out of his fringe, and glares at it with personal offence.
You tap your pen. “Who’s she with?”
His whole body goes tight. “Someone.”
“Someone?” you repeat, bored on purpose.
He exhales. “Choi Yeonjun.”
You let the name land, not because you’re impressed—because you enjoy watching him suffer.
Soobin’s eyes flicker. “You know him?”
“Everyone knows him,” you say. “Campus bicycle.”
Soobin looks taken aback. “That’s—”
“Accurate,” you cut in. “Now. You want her back? You want him gone? You want me to meddle?”
He leans forward, voice low and serious. “I want you to fix it.”
“Fix it,” you echo, and you open the envelope at last.
It’s full of crisp, thick notes. The kind of money that doesn’t come from part-time jobs and overdrafts. The kind of money that makes your chest squeeze in a way you hate. You could pay rent with this, you could buy groceries without doing maths in the aisle, you could stop pretending you’re fine for a month.
You keep your face neutral anyway. You’re not giving him the satisfaction of seeing you react.
He watches you, waiting for you to say it’s not enough. You don’t.
You just slide the cash into your drawer and close it with a click. “So,” you say, folding your hands. “You want a talisman.”
Soobin nods fast. “Yes.”
You reach into a little box beside you and pull out a pendant on a string—cheap metal you bought from AliExpress, washed in salt water, dressed up as destiny—and drop it into his palm.
He stares at it with the seriousness of a man holding a relic. “I need to wear this?”
“All the time,” you say.
“In the shower?”
“Yes.”
“While I sleep?”
“Yes.”
He hesitates. “What if it falls off?”
You meet his eyes. “Then the ghost gets stronger.”
He goes pale. You bite the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing—because you’re a professional and also because you’ve got a reputation to maintain as the local love shaman, not the local menace.
Soobin closes his fingers around the pendant, gripping it as if it might save his life. “How long does it take?”
You shrug. “Depends how clingy she is.”
“The ghost?”
“Yeah,” you say, deadpan. “Not the girl—the girl left. The ghost stayed.”
He flinches. “That’s not even funny.”
“It is a bit funny,” you reply. “Not to you, obviously—to me.”
Soobin’s jaw tightens. “You’re awful.”
“And you’re paying me,” you remind him, leaning back. “So maybe ask yourself what that says about your decision-making.”
He exhales, frustrated, then nods once, accepting his fate. He stands, still clutching the pendant. He looks as though he’s walked into a cult and decided to commit anyway because heartbreak is worse.
At the door, he pauses. He glances back, voice quieter. “This is real, right?”
You smile, bright and sweet, and lie straight through your teeth. “Of course it’s real.”
Soobin nods, believing you—then leaves with rice in his hair and hope in his pocket. You watch him go, and turn to open your drawer again, just to look at the cash. It reminds you that morality is for people with savings.
“Easy money,” you mutter.
If only you had known how badly this was going to come back and bite you in the ass.
A week after you hand Soobin the damp pendant and take his cash, you learn something important about Choi Soobin as a person.
He does not know how to leave shit alone.
You already knew he was polite. You already knew he had the spine of a wet napkin when feelings got involved. What you didn’t clock fast enough is that he treats spiritual work the way people treat their Amazon orders—track it, refresh it, poke it, panic when it doesn’t arrive within twenty-four hours.
Your phone becomes his second talisman. It starts with messages that pretend they’re quick.
fucking moron: hi sorry
fucking moron: quick one
fucking moron: if i walk under a ladder will something bad happen
You ignore it for ten minutes, then answer anyway—since you’re weak and also trying to keep your scam believable.
you: no. fuck off.
Three dots appear instantly.
fucking moron: okay sorry
fucking moron: i walked under one by accident
fucking moron: it should be fine right
You put your phone face-down and press your forehead to the table—the folding one with the dodgy leg that wobbles any time you show emotion, as if it’s embarrassed to be seen with you.
Mangy watches you from the cushion, eyes half-lidded, tail flicking once. He’s been fed and watered, yet he still treats you like a disappointment.
Then the calls start.
Your phone rings at 12:17am while you’re standing over the sink eating noodles straight out of the pot. fucking moron flashes up. Your whole body goes rigid because you know the next ten minutes are about to be stolen.
You answer without greeting. “What?”
“Oh,” he says, startled, as if he expected you to answer with a smile and a prayer. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to call this late.”
“You called,” you reply. “This isn’t a sneeze. It didn’t happen by accident.”
He pauses, then rushes on. “The pendant. It’s—warm.”
You shut your eyes. “It’s on your chest.”
“It’s warmer than normal,” he insists. “I noticed it and I thought—what if it’s a sign?”
“Your sign is that you’re anxious and have too much free time,” you tell him.
“I can’t sleep,” he admits. “I keep thinking about her.” The words come out like he’s ashamed of them.
You pinch the bridge of your nose. “Right. So you’re ringing me to tell me you’re heartbroken?”
“No,” he says quickly. “I’m ringing because the talisman—”
“Yeah,” you cut in, “and the talisman is warm because your body is warm and your feelings are boiling your brain. This is Year Seven science and Year One emotional incompetence. Were you bullied in school or did you just outsource your brain to Switzerland?”
He clears his throat. “I wasn’t bullied.”
“You should’ve been,” you mutter.
“You’re very rude,” he says.
“And you’re very persistent,” you reply. “We all have flaws.”
Silence.
Then, very careful, “So it means nothing.”
It cannot mean nothing—not to him, not to your rent, not to your pride.
You drop your voice into your professional tone, the one that sounds calm even when you’re exhausted. “It means something,” you say. “Warmth means movement. Movement means the ghost is reacting.”
“So it’s working?”
“It’s working,” you confirm. “Now hang up and stop treating me as your spiritual 111.”
“Okay,” he whispers. “Sorry. Thank you.”
He hangs up.
You stare at your pot of noodles and whisper, “I hate my life.”
Mangy blinks slowly and yawns.
By day three, he starts sending photos.
Not of the girl—of course not—because that would be logical and useful. Choi Soobin does not do logical and useful.
Instead, he sends photos of the pendant. Pendant in his palm. Pendant on his desk. Pendant next to an iced americano.
fucking moron: is it the right colour
fucking moron: does it look normal
fucking moron: sorry
fucking moron: i know you said don’t check
fucking moron: i’m not checking i’m just asking
You don’t even answer anymore, you just throw your phone onto your bed and let it bounce.
That night, you dream he’s standing in your hallway holding the pendant out, saying sorry on loop, and you’re trying to scream but your voice won’t work.
When you wake up, your jaw aches from clenching.
By Thursday, he escalates.
Three visits in one day.
You’ve been up all night working on an assignment you hate. Your laptop’s open. Your essay cursor blinks at you. Your eyes feel gritty. Your brain feels empty. Your hoodie is inside out and you don’t have the energy to care.
At 9am on the dot, your doorbell starts ringing. You stare at the door for a full five seconds, hoping it’s a hallucination.
It’s not, because it rings again. You drag yourself up, shuffle down the hall barefoot, and yank the door open. Soobin stands there holding two iced coffees.
He’s dressed clean again. Hair neat, face calm. He looks like he slept. You feel personally attacked.
“Morning,” he says, too bright.
“I don’t morning,” you reply.
He lifts the tray. “I brought coffee.”
You look down at the label. Iced americano. You look back up. “Do you hate yourself or is this a cry for help?”
He frowns. “It wakes me up.”
“So does fear,” you snap. “Shoes off.”
He steps inside—lines up his trainers neatly, of course—follows you into the back room. He sets the coffees down with care, then looks at you with a hopeful expression that makes you want to swear at the universe.
“I didn’t ask for this,” you point at the sweating cups. “This is unsolicited suffering.”
“I thought you might want caffeine,” he offers.
“I want silence,” you tell him.
His hand jerks back. “Sorry.”
“You apologise like it’s your hobby,” you say. “You know what, stop—apologise when you actually do something wrong, not every time you exist.”
His mouth parts. He looks genuinely confused, then nods once, taking notes mentally like you’re teaching him something sacred.
“Sit,” you say. “Report your ghost symptoms.”
You both get comfortable, your face switching to serious—after all, you’re a professional.
“Warm,” he says quickly. “The talisman was warm around seven.”
“Good,” you say, nodding like you’ve read omens in the steam of his iced americano.
Relief hits him again.
Then you wave at the door. “Now take your drinks and fuck off.”
He blinks. “Huh?”
“Yes,” you say. “Go away. Go attend your lectures. Go haunt someone else. Go stop making my life your side quest.”
He nods, clutching his cup, and leaves.
You watch him go and mutter, “I’m going to die.”
Mangy jumps onto the table, sniffs the other iced americano he left behind, recoils, then stares at you with judgement.
Even your cat has standards.
The second visit happens in the afternoon.
You’re mid-paragraph—fighting your essay into submission—when your phone lights up with his name and the doorbell rings immediately after, as if he’s timed it for maximum damage. You open the door and he’s there again, damp from drizzle, eyes wide in the exact brand of panic that should be illegal in daylight.
“I stepped on a crack,” he says.
You blink once. “Okay?”
“So—” he swallows. “So what do I do?”
You stare at him harder. “You came here—for a crack?”
“It wasn’t just a crack,” he says, offended. “It was a long one.”
You lean on the doorframe. “Soobin. Be serious.”
“I am being serious,” he insists, voice tight. “You said signs matter. I stepped on it and then I thought—what if that’s her? What if that’s the ghost telling me I’m—” he makes a small helpless gesture, “—done?”
You rub your face with both hands. “You’re going to put me in an early grave.”
His shoulders rise, then drop. “Is it bad?”
You make your voice calm. Professional. The tone of someone who charges for emotional labour. “Yes.”
He goes paler.
“Not doomed bad,” you add, because you’re not trying to actually kill him. “Just—you’ve disrupted the energy line.”
“The energy line,” he repeats.
“You stepped on a crack,” you say. “You basically stepped on her throat.”
His eyes widen. “Oh my God.”
“Yeah,” you deadpan. “She’s pissed.”
He panics immediately. “I didn’t mean to—I-I didn’t see it. It was raining and people were walking and—”
“Stop,” you cut in. “She doesn’t care about your excuses.”
His mouth opens, closes, opens again. “So what do I do?”
You sigh. “Go back to the crack.”
His face does something ugly. “Go back?”
“Yeah,” you say. “You go back,” you continue, “you step over it—not on it—three times. Don’t touch it. Don’t breathe on it. Don’t do your little sorry face at the pavement.”
“I don’t have a sorry face.”
You stare at him until he gives up.
“Okay,” he mutters. “Three times.”
“And after that,” you say, pointing at him, “you stop showing up here.”
His throat works. “I just—I don’t want to mess this up.”
“You already did,” you reply. “Now fix it and leave me alone.”
He nods like you’ve saved his life. “Okay. Thank you.”
“Go,” you snap. “Before I curse you myself.”
He looks offended and tired, but he leaves anyway.
The third visit is the worst. It happens at 11pm.
You’re in bed with a mask on, hair wrapped and duvet pulled up. Mangy is pressed against your thigh, purring as he gets comfortable. The doorbell rings. You don’t move, willing for the noise to be a hallucination. It rings again—and again.
You throw the duvet off, stomp down the hall, and rip the door open. Soobin stands there with his coat on, eyes wide with guilt.
You stare at him. “No.”
“I’m sorry,” he blurts. “I had a dream.”
Your eyelid twitches. “Of course you did.”
“It felt important,” he insists.
“You’re in my building at eleven in the night,” you reply. “Everything feels important when you’re being a lunatic.”
He steps inside without asking. Takes his shoes off and lines them neatly again—it makes your eyelid twitch harder.
You drag him into the studio in your pyjamas and face mask, then point at the cushion. “Sit. Talk. Make it quick before my skin dries and cracks off my face.”
He sits and explains the dream with mortifying sincerity. Corridors. The girl. A faceless man. Panic. He uses his hands too, drawing shapes in the air. You listen with your chin in your hand—face mask tightening and patience evaporating.
When he finishes, you stare at him for a beat, then you start laughing—a full, exhausted laughter that makes your face mask crack at the corner.
Soobin looks wounded. “Why are you laughing?”
“I’m laughing at the situation,” you manage. “Not at you.” You are absolutely laughing at him. You straighten up and slip back into your shaman voice—calm, grounded and certain. “It’s instruction,” you say. “It means you’re ready for the next step.”
Hope hits him immediately. “What step?”
You tap the table once. “Go home. Sleep. Forty-eight hours of silence. No temperature reports and no dreams in my inbox. Then come back and we’ll talk.”
He nods fast. “Okay.”
“And if you text me at four in the morning about some next level bullshit,” you add, “I’m charging you extra and telling the ghost you’ve been cheating on her with an iced americano.”
His eyes widen. “You can do that?”
“I’m self-employed,” you say. “Spiritually burdened—underpaid. I can do whatever I want.”
He leaves. You lock the door and go back to bed. You get under the duvet and stare at the cracks in the ceiling.
At 03:58am, your phone buzzes.
fucking moron: sorry. quick one. there’s a full moon tonight. is that a bad sign?
You stare at the message until your eyes sting. Then you type back with the fury of a woman whose lies have evolved into a full-time job.
you: no. go to sleep. stop texting me.
Three dots appear. Disappear. Appear again.
fucking moron: okay. sorry. thank you.
You throw the phone onto the pillow and whisper into the dark, “I regret everything.”
Mangy purrs, smug, and presses his head against your ribs. You lie there realising you didn’t scam a normal man—you scammed a man who will destroy you with manners.
By Saturday, you decide that you’re going to get rid of Choi Soobin.
Not permanently—you’re not a murderer. You’re tired, broke, spiritually fraudulent, but not homicidal. You just need him off your fucking doorstep long enough to finish your assignment, wash your hair, and remember what silence sounds like without his pendant updates creeping into it.
He’s sat opposite you again, upright, buttoned up, clean as always. Same neat hair, same expensive watch, same careful posture. He’s holding the pendant under his collar with two fingers, still treating it with reverence. He’s learnt nothing—which is impressive, in a depressing way.
You stare at him over the rim of your mug and let your face go blank—no warmth, no comfort, no empathy. He doesn’t pay you enough for that.
“So,” he says, quiet and controlled. “I did what you said—I didn’t come and I didn’t text.”
“You did text,” you correct.
His ears go red immediately. “I didn’t spam text.”
“Still text,” you reply, then you wave your hand. “Whatever. You didn’t show up—that’s something.”
He nods once, relieved you’re not about to lecture him. “It still feels warm sometimes.”
You lean back in your chair and squint at him, starting your performance. Then you stand. Soobin’s eyes track you with nervous focus. He sits up straighter—which is ridiculous, since he’s already sat up straight. His hands flatten on his thighs.
You circle him once, slow and deliberate. You stare at his shoulder, his collarbone, the space behind him, the air.
Soobin swallows hard. “What are you doing?”
“Shut up,” you say. “I’m reading.”
“I’m not talking,” he says automatically, then stops himself, and adds, quieter, “Sorry.”
You click your tongue.
His face tightens. “What?”
You click your tongue again, louder and meaner. Soobin’s gaze flicks to Mangy on the windowsill, as if your cat might translate. Mangy doesn’t even look at him—-he’s too busy ignoring the entire human race.
You stop in front of Soobin and stare down at him until he starts squirming. His knee shifts, his hands flex, his whole body tries to stay polite while his brain panics.
“Yeah,” you say at last. “Now it makes sense.”
Soobin goes very still. “What makes sense?”
You lean in slightly, voice dropping, serious enough to frighten him. “The ghost has gotten stronger.”
He blinks. “The—g-ghost?”
“The virgin ghost,” you say, enunciating slowly. “She’s resisting the talisman.”
His hands lift, hover near his collar, then drop again. He doesn’t know where to put them. He looks genuinely scared and it makes you want to kick yourself—except you’re also annoyed, since he’s the one who walked into your life and decided you’re his spiritual saviour.
“What does that mean,” he asks, voice tight. “Is it—bad? Is she—she angry?
“She’s territorial,” you say. “She doesn’t want you to move on. She likes the attention.”
Soobin’s throat works. “So the pendant isn’t enough?”
“It’s doing work,” you say, firm, selling it. “We just need to escalate.”
His eyes widen. “What do I have to do?”
Here we go—the part where you commit your greatest masterpiece of bullshit. You walk back to your pillow, sit down, and open your notebook as if it contains ancient knowledge instead of doodles. You pick up your pen and tap it twice on the page, letting the silence build.
Soobin leans forward without meaning to. His hands grip his knees. “Please,” he says, and it comes out raw enough to make you feel a twinge of something inconvenient in your chest. “Tell me what to do.”
You hold his gaze and nod slowly, grave as hell. “You need a stronger ritual.”
He nods immediately, desperate. “Okay.”
You keep your face straight. You can’t laugh—not yet. “Eleven days straight.”
He nods again. “Okay.”
“At 11:11pm,” you continue, voice steady, “you eat eleven grapes under a table.”
You watch his brain try to process that sentence. His eyes flicker. His mouth parts and he looks at you as if you’ve just asked him to commit a crime. “Under a table?” he repeats.
“Under a table,” you confirm.
He frowns, confused and horrified at once. “Why?”
You lean forward, lowering your voice. “Tables are thresholds.”
He stares at you. “Tables are—thresholds?”
“Between worlds,” you add, tapping the notebook once for emphasis.
Soobin swallows. “Right.”
“You cannot use your own table,” you say. “If it’s your table, she follows you under it.”
Soobin’s eyes widen. “She can follow me under it?”
“Yes,” you say, calm, as if you’re discussing the weather. “It can be a friend’s table. Café table. Common room. Anywhere—just not yours.”
He nods slowly, trying to keep up. “Okay.”
“You can’t use the same table twice,” you add.
His head jerks. “Why not?”
“Pattern,” you say. “She learns the pattern.”
He looks pained. “So I have to find eleven different tables.”
“You’re a student,” you reply. “Your entire life is tables.”
He flinches, then nods like that’s fair. “Okay.”
“The grapes must be green,” you continue. “Same size. Same shape. No random grapes or close enough—no lumpy ones either.”
His brows pull together. “How am I meant to—”
“You’re rich,” you cut in. “Go buy posh grapes.”
His ears go red. “I’m not—”
“One grape per minute,” you say. “In complete silence,” you add, pointing at him. “No phone. No talking. No music. No praying out loud. No whispering. No chewing with enthusiasm.”
He looks terrified. “Why silence?”
“Sound attracts her,” you say. “Silence starves her,” you continue, and you can hear how much he wants this to be true. “She feeds on attention. She feeds on desperation. She feeds on you checking and panicking.”
Soobin nods faster now, fully locked in. “Okay. I can do silence.”
“You can’t even do silence for ten minutes,” you mutter.
His eyes snap up. “I can.”
“We’ll see,” you reply, and you flip the page in your notebook with a flourish, as if you’re consulting a sacred text. You keep your tone very serious while you deliver the final nail, the one that will keep him away for at least a week out of sheer stress. “And Soobin,” you say, voice low, “whatever you do, don’t let the grapes fall on the floor.”
He freezes completely. His eyes widen slowly, dread creeping in. “Why?”
You lean in closer, enough to make him hold his breath. You whisper, “She eats what falls.”
Soobin goes so pale he looks unwell. He sits there for a second, silent, then his voice comes out small. “She—e-eats it?
You nod once.
He stares at the table as if the floor beneath it is suddenly dangerous. His hands curl around his knees. “So I have to—eat grapes under a table. Eleven days. Eleven-eleven. Silence. Different table. Green grapes. Same size. One per minute. No dropping.”
“Look at you,” you say. “You can follow instructions.”
He looks up at you with raw misery. “This is humiliating.”
You tilt your head. “Humiliation is temporary. Losing the love of your life is longer.”
Soobin’s jaw tightens. His eyes flicker, stubbornness sparking under the fear. “Fine,” he says, voice rough. “I’ll do it.”
“Good,” you reply, satisfied, and you push yourself up from your chair. “Now take your pendant, stop texting me, and go plan your table tour.”
He stands too, still pale, still holding the string under his collar as if it’s the only thing keeping his life together. “Do I start tonight?”
“Yes,” you say immediately. “Tonight.”
He nods once, then hesitates at your door, coat half on, keys in hand—the look of a man about to walk out and willingly crawl under a table with fruit. He glances back, voice quieter. “This will work?”
You smile, bright and sweet, and lie straight through your teeth. “Of course it will.”
Soobin nods, believing you, and leaves.
You lock the door behind him, lean your forehead against it, and let out the ugliest laugh you’ve ever made in your life. “Fucking idiot.”
Mangy chooses that moment to jump onto your table, sniff the rice bowl, then sit down on your notebook as if he’s heard the whole plan and approves.
You stare at him. “I’m going to hell.”
Mangy blinks slowly.
Eleven days of peace. No full-moon calls. No cloud photos. No is my talisman warm bullshit. Priceless.
And then—annoyingly—your brain flashes his face again. The way he looked at you like you were the last door left unlocked. Shit. Why does his desperation feel so... raw?
You shove the thought away. Not your problem.
Choi Soobin tells himself this is a test.
A trade with the universe—the love of his life in exchange for his pride. He has smiled through worse. He has survived a date where she ran away to another man and still managed to say, “It’s alright,” with a straight face, then gone and drank until sunrise.
So yes. Grapes under a table. Humiliation is nothing new.
He repeats that to himself while he walks into a café he’s never been to before. It’s on a side street far enough from campus that nobody should clock him; close enough to your studio that he can sprint to you if something goes wrong and the ghost eats his fruit. He hates that he can picture you saying it, deadpan, and eyes narrowed.
The café is warm and smells of burnt coffee and syrup. Two students sit in the corner with laptops open, whispering about deadlines. A couple by the window argue about something quietly—faces close, voices soft, the kind of intimacy that makes Soobin’s throat tighten for reasons he’s not willing to admit. The barista wipes down the counter with bored efficiency, eyes half-lidded, hair clipped back.
Soobin steps up, adjusting the strap of his bag. It’s heavy since the grapes are inside. He can feel them knocking gently against each other with every shift of his shoulder—neat, little green stones he paid far too much attention to in the supermarket.
The barista looks up. “You alright?”
Soobin forces a polite smile. “Yeah. Hi. Can I get a—”
He stops himself from saying hot chocolate. He doesn’t drink hot chocolate. He doesn’t do that. That’s you, not Soobin. He ends up ordering something out of character regardless, because he can hear your voice in his head making fun of him for his choices in beverages. “A tea, please,” he says. “English breakfast.”
The barista nods. “Sit in or take away?”
“Ta—” His tongue sticks for a second. “Sit in. Please.”
“Cash or card?”
He taps his card, machine beeping, receipt spitting out. He takes the tea with both hands as if he’s carrying something fragile.
He chooses the corner table on instinct. It’s small and round, with two chairs. One of the chairs wobbles slightly and Soobin finds himself irrationally irritated by it. Even furniture has more freedom than him tonight.
He sets the tea down, sits and tries to act normal. He checks the time. Eight minutes left.
His stomach flips. His chest feels tight. His throat tastes faintly metallic, the way it does when he’s nervous and pretending he’s not. He pulls his phone out again—then remembers you said no phone during the ritual, no sound, no whispers, no music, no praying out loud. So he turns it face-down on the table and stares at the wood grain as if it’s going to offer guidance.
He tells himself he’s in control, he can do this and nobody will notice.
A group of three walks in, cold air follows them. They talk over each other. One of them laughs too hard. The café seems smaller all of a sudden.
Soobin adjusts his posture, shoulders tense. He wraps his fingers around his tea cup just to have something to hold. The tea is too hot. He doesn’t care—heat feels better than the empty churn in his body.
He watches the barista glance toward the CLOSING SOON sign, then back at the group, then at the clock. It’s late. People linger anyway, dragging out their last warm minutes.
He reaches into his bag and touches the grape container through the fabric—plastic, smooth, cold. He imagines the grapes inside, uniform and green, all as identical as he could make them. He spent ten minutes in the supermarket staring at fruit, comparing sizes, turning them gently—feeling like an idiot while a woman next to him picked up a bag of clementines and walked away without a second thought.
He wonders what his dad would say if he saw him now. He wonders what she would say. He already knows what you’d say.
You’d swear. You’d laugh. You’d call him a fucking moron and then tell him to do it properly—no skipping, no excuses, no whining.
His chest tightens with gratitude at the thought of you, which is inconvenient. You are not supposed to be part of this. You are the person he paid. You are the person who threw rice at him. You are not supposed to take up space in his head.
He checks the time. 11:09pm. He stands up.
His chair scrapes against the floor, loud in his ears. The barista glances over, eyes flicking to him, then away. Soobin keeps his face. The group of three has moved toward the counter, debating pastries. The couple by the window is still whispering. The two students are typing, headphones in, faces blank. The barista is stacking cups.
Soobin slides off his chair, bends down slowly, and ducks under the table.
His long legs are immediately a problem. His knees knock against the underside of the table. His back hunches. The floor is cold and the air down here smells faintly of dust and old crumbs.
He hates everything.
He lays a napkin on the floor first. Not for the café’s sake—for his own. If a grape falls and rolls away, he needs a surface he can control. He needs to believe he can stop the ghost from eating what falls.
He places the grapes on the napkin in neat lines. His fingers shake slightly and he forces them still.
He adjusts his position again, his knees ache already. He tries to sit back on his heels and his back complains, his shoulders complain, his dignity screams.
He checks the time again. 11:10pm. He doesn’t have long. He shuts his eyes for a second and breathes through his nose.
He thinks of Switzerland. The snow and mountains. Professors who smiled at him. The air sharp and clean. The routine of it, the safety of it. He thinks of her voice over the phone, soft in his ear, familiar and dangerous in a way he didn’t understand until it was too late.
He thinks of the cinema date he rehearsed for years. Warm golden lights. Popcorn between them. Her smile when she laughed at something on screen. The way his chest swelled with relief every time she leaned closer.
He thinks of her eyes drifting elsewhere. He thinks of her saying, “Then I met someone else.”
His stomach turns and his chest feels twisted. He hates the way his body remembers that moment as if it happened an hour ago.
He opens his eyes.
The underside of the table is right there, the chair legs, his own shoes near the edge of the napkin.
He checks the time again. 11:11pm. It’s time. He picks up the first grape. He hears her voice in his head again, crisp and gentle and ruinous, “I met someone else.”
He shoves the grape into his mouth. It’s cold, sweet and crunches slightly. Juice hits his tongue. He chews carefully, silently, as if the ghost is hovering above him with a clipboard.
He swallows.
He sits perfectly still, waiting for the minute to pass. A chair scrapes somewhere above him. The café floor vibrates faintly. His heart starts hammering. Someone walks past his table. Soobin’s whole body goes rigid. He keeps his gaze fixed on the napkin, he keeps his hands still and doesn’t breathe loudly. He doesn’t move—doesn’t exist.
The footsteps move on.
He picks up the second grape at 11:12. His fingers tremble. He forces them steady. He eats it, chewing in silence.
His back aches, his neck is already stiff, his jaw hurts from clenching. He cannot believe that this is his life.
At 11:13, the third grape. At 11:14, the fourth. At 11:15, the fifth.
Time becomes a series of grapes and fear.
His thoughts keep trying to escape, drifting back to her, to Yeonjun, to the humiliation of sitting across from her while she smiled politely and held his hand and then left him in the street with an apology he didn’t deserve.
He drags his focus back. He counts minutes and grapes. He keeps his mouth shut and his hands steady.
At the sixth grape, something absurd bubbles up in him—a laugh. A sharp, disbelieving sound he has to swallow down so hard it makes his eyes water. He almost laughs at himself.
Choi Soobin. Golden boy. Professor’s favourite. Son of a man who gives cars instead of praises.
On his knees under a café table. Eating grapes. In silence. For a ghost.
If anyone he knows could see him right now, he would never recover. He’d have to transfer universities. Change his name. Fake his death. Move to Scotland and become a sheep farmer. He’d have to live among animals that don’t talk.
At the eighth grape, his stomach growls quietly. He panics all over again. You said sound attracts the ghost and silence starves her. His stomach is making noise—his body is betraying him. He presses his lips together and holds his breath, hoping the ghost doesn’t hear hunger.
At the ninth grape, his jaw starts to ache.
At the tenth, his fingers are stiff and cold.
He picks up the last grape at 11:21pm, chews slowly, swallows, then sits perfectly still under the table with nothing left on the napkin except a few tiny wet marks where the grapes rested.
He has done it.
He expects—something. A shift, a sign, a feeling, a weight lifting off his chest. The ghost retreating or destiny cracking open.
Nothing happens.
The café continues above him. Cups clink. Someone laughs. The barista calls out an order. Life goes on with zero respect for his suffering.
Soobin remains on his knees for another full minute anyway, staring at the napkin, waiting for the universe to acknowledge him. Then he hears your voice in his head again. Humiliation is temporary. Losing the love of your life is longer.
He squeezes his eyes shut and thinks, please. Please let this work. Please let him stop feeling like this.
He crawls out from under the table slowly—dust on his knees, pain in his back, shame clinging to him in layers.
He stands, brushes his hands on his jeans, adjusts his coat, and forces his face into calm.
The barista glances over. “You alright, mate?”
Soobin nods once. “Yeah.”
His voice comes out steady and he hates himself for being able to sound normal. He gulps down his tea, now cold, and walks out into the night with the pendant tucked under his shirt. He takes three steps down the pavement before he pulls his phone out and opens your chat.
His thumb hovers, but he doesn’t type.
He puts the phone back in his pocket and keeps walking—jaw tight, eyes burning, determined to finish eleven days of this even if it kills him.
He is not letting a ghost beat him. He is not letting Yeonjun beat him. He is not letting his own pride beat him either.
He walks to his car with dust on his knees, a plan in his head and one ugly thought circling again and again, refusing to leave.
Tomorrow, he has to find another table.
It’s been a week since you last saw Choi Soobin. Thank fuck.
Your doorbell hasn’t been violated. Your phone hasn’t lit up with pendant photos and moon anxiety. Your studio hasn’t had to host a rich boy breathing politely while you invent a virgin ghost on the spot. The quiet should feel like peace—it mostly feels like you’re in the eye of something that’s about to swing back round and hit you.
Mangy is loafed on the windowsill, back turned, tail flicking in slow judgement. He’s been fed and still acting offended. Your cat has never worked a day in his life and yet he carries himself with the confidence of a CEO.
Your phone buzzes.
plug
You grin before you even open it. You nicknamed Kang Taehyun that years ago when you were both stuck in the countryside and he started connecting people for favours—who had cigarettes, who had vodka, who had a spare charger, who had a cousin that could get you a cheap fake ID.
He’s been a plug since he had acne and a mouth that didn’t know when to shut.
plug: you’re going to hell
plug: meet me. fcf. now.
Your stomach does a tiny relieved drop because you know you’re about to leave your flat and be around someone who understands you without having to explain your whole life story first.
you: where
plug: mike’s. i’m outside yours in five.
You look at Mangy. Mangy looks at the street. Nobody cares that you’re being summoned.
You grab your coat, shove your feet into trainers, and step out into the cold. The air bites your face, sharp and damp. You pull your hood up and lock the door, then stand there, waiting.
Taehyun appears at the end of the street with his hoodie up and his hands shoved deep in his pockets, shoulders hunched against the weather. He’s got that city version of himself now—faster walk, harder edges, eyes that have seen too many drunk breakdowns—but his mouth is the same you’ve known since you were kids—blunt, quick, always ready to be a cunt.
He stops in front of you and looks you up and down. “You look like shit,” he says.
“Nice to see you too,” you reply. “You look underpaid.”
He snorts. “I am underpaid. I also have morals, which is why I’m here to tell you that you’re evil.”
“Shut the fuck up, Plug,” you say, stepping past him. “You’re the one who dropped that unyielding moron in my lap and went rich, pathetic, prime as if you were seasoning him.”
Taehyun catches up, walking beside you. “I did not say prime.”
“You did,” you reply. “You called him fresh in the same message you asked me for your cut.”
He flinches with fake offence. “It’s not a cut. It’s commission.”
“It’s a cut,” you insist. “You siphon clients out of your bar and send them to me when they’re emotionally bleeding. That’s not a friendship. That’s an MLM.”
Taehyun points at you without looking. “Don’t start with me. I heard your voice note. I heard the whole eleven thing.”
You grin. “It was a strong story.”
“That is not a story,” he says. “That’s psychological terrorism.”
You glance at him. “And you’re acting brand new for a man who has lied straight out of his ass for less than a tenner.”
Taehyun’s mouth twists. “That’s different.”
“Explain.”
He exhales, annoyed. “When I lie, it’s for survival.”
“And when I lie, it’s what?” you shoot back. “Performance art?”
He doesn’t answer for a second, and you feel it—the little guilt line he’s trying to pretend isn’t there. Taehyun’s conscience only turns up when he’s sober and the bar’s quiet. Once he’s had a drink, it clocks out again.
“You’ve got a conscience now?” you say, dragging it out.
He groans. “Don’t.”
“So grapes under tables is where your moral compass draws the line?” you continue. “Not the virgin ghost. Not the pendant. Not the fact you sent a heartbreak case to a scammer. The grapes?”
Taehyun’s jaw tightens. “It’s not the grapes. It’s the table.”
You stare. “The table?”
He spreads his hands. “He’s on his knees under public furniture. That’s where it tips into this man might actually collapse.”
“He won’t collapse,” you say. “He’s too polite to collapse.”
Taehyun’s lips twitch. “That’s the saddest sentence I’ve heard all week.”
You both walk in silence for a few beats, the city noise soft around you—cars passing, someone shouting into a phone, the wet hush of pavement. The silence isn’t awkward—it’s familiar. You’ve known each other too long for awkward.
You and Taehyun grew up in the same nowhere. Same hills, same muddy fields, same bus that came late, same kind of boredom that makes you either rot or plot. You left for uni and dragged your baggage into the city with you. He got a job behind a bar and realised how easy it is to become everyone’s confessional. You realised how easy it is to sell hope when you’re hungry and good at reading faces.
Fridays are FCF. Fried Chicken Friday. Grease, booze, and bitching. Your version of therapy—cheaper and somehow still effective.
“You’re the one who just scammed a rich boy,” he fires back.
You stop walking and turn to him. “Do not make me buy shots using Soobin’s money.”
Taehyun’s grin goes feral. “You already did worse. You bought incense with his money.”
“That was business expenses.”
“So are shots,” he says. “Emotional labour.”
You roll your eyes and keep walking. Mike’s is a grim little pub off the high street that survives entirely on students and poor decisions. It has sticky tables, a battered jukebox, and booths that feel permanently damp. It also has cheap shots, which is the only spiritual protection you need.
When you push the door open, warm stale air hits you. The lighting is bad. The music is worse. Someone’s already laughing too loud at the bar.
Perfect.
Taehyun heads straight for your usual booth in the corner, the one with the cracked vinyl seat and the table scarred with initials. You slide in opposite him, shrugging your coat off, letting the noise of the pub settle around you.
A server walks past. Taehyun lifts two fingers. “One portion of niblets and chips. Two shots of whatever’s cheapest and will ruin our night.”
You glance at him. “You’re going to die.”
Taehyun leans back, grinning. “We’re already dying. Might as well do it drunk.”
The shots arrive first. Two little glasses of clear liquid that smell of petrol and poor decisions. Taehyun drags one closer and nudges the other toward you with his knuckle—eyes bright in that feral way he gets when he’s about to enjoy your crimes in real time.
“Cheers,” he says.
“Cheers,” you echo, clinking glasses.
You both knock them back.
It burns all the way down. It hits your chest and makes your brain loosen its grip on the week. Your eyes water. Taehyun’s face twists, then he slaps the table once, satisfied. The niblets and chips land next—hot plate, greasy smell, sauce in a little plastic pot. You both dig in immediately, since neither of you has ever pretended to be classy and this pub would eat you alive if you tried.
Taehyun chews, points at you with a chip. “Right. Script. From the start. Don’t skip—I want the full fucking thing.”
You wipe your fingers on a napkin. “Why are you so obsessed?”
“Because it’s insane,” he says. “You traumatised a man with fruit and I need to witness the full extent of your villain era.”
You snort. “He deserved it.”
“He did not deserve it,” Taehyun replies immediately, then ruins his own point with a grin. “Actually—no, wait. He kind of did. He kept turning up at your flat, didn’t he?”
“Every day,” you say. “Every hour. He was treating my studio like it was A&E. Sorry, quick one, is warmth good—Sorry, quick one, is the moon a bad sign—Sorry, quick one, can the ghost follow me into Tesco.’”
Taehyun chokes on a laugh. “Not Tesco.”
“I swear on my life,” you say, stabbing a niblet with your fork. “He didn’t say Tesco out loud but his face implied it. His face implied he’d apologise to a self-checkout machine.”
Taehyun slams his palm on the table, wheezing. “That’s so him.”
“Exactly,” you say. “So I needed him gone. I needed to stop hearing quick one before I snapped and started chewing my own arm off.”
Taehyun points at you. “So you invented the grapes.”
“Masterpiece,” you correct.
Taehyun’s grin widens. “Go on.”
You lean forward, lowering your voice as if anyone in this pub gives a shit. “I told him the ghost got stronger.”
Taehyun stares, delighted. “You did not.”
“I did,” you say. “He went pale. The man looked like he was about to faint politely.”
Taehyun laughs so hard he has to wipe his eyes. “Stop. Stop. That’s exactly the image.”
“And then,” you continue, fully warmed up now, “I hit him with the whole eleven thing under a table.”
Taehyun makes a noise that is half laugh, half despair. “You’re going to hell.”
“I’m already in hell,” you say, then gesture at yourself. “Broke uni student. Debts bigger than me. Bad skin. Cat hates me. Landlord thinks mould is a vibe.”
Taehyun, in the same boat, laughs harder. “That’s fair.”
“I literally scam for a living,” you add, voice warm with alcohol and truth. “Tell me how hell can get any worse.”
Taehyun wipes at his mouth, still laughing. “I don’t know, man. You’ve sort of maxed it out.”
By the fourth shot, the line between sobriety and client confidentiality starts blurring. By the fifth, it’s fully gone. The two of you start bitching about clients, since that’s what you do when you’re drunk and bitter and pretending the city didn’t chew you up.
Taehyun starts first. “This one girl came last week and cried at my bar because her ex unfollowed her.”
You groan. “Don’t.”
“She kept asking me if I think it means he still loves her,” Taehyun says, voice rising. “I was stood there polishing a glass, thinking, babe, it means he’s tired of your shit.”
You snort. “I had a girl ask me if she should burn cinnamon under her bed to make her crush text her back.”
Taehyun stares. “Under her bed?”
“Under her bed,” you repeat. “I told her yes—I told her to do it at 3:33am and to whisper his name into the smoke. She paid me thirty quid.”
Taehyun’s mouth drops open. “You’re evil.”
“Thank you,” you say.
“This one bloke came in convinced he was cursed,” Taehyun adds. “Turns out he was just a cunt.”
“That’s most men,” you reply, picking at the chips. “If your life is falling apart, check your personality first.”
Taehyun lifts his glass again. “Cheers to being mentally ill and employed.”
“Barely employed,” you correct, clinking.
You laugh. You talk over each other, voices getting louder and jokes meaner. The pub noise wraps around you like insulation. For a few minutes, it’s easy. It feels like being fifteen again, both of you sat on a wall outside the corner shop, swearing at the sky and plotting your escape.
Same mouths. Same filth. Just bigger problems now.
Taehyun brings it back to Soobin, of course. “The virgin ghost story is diabolical though,” he says. “Poor guy probably shitting himself.”
“Good,” you say. “He should be scared. He was too calm for a man whose entire life was on fire.”
Taehyun laughs again. “He’s so polite. He probably apologised to the table before crawling under it.”
You mimic Soobin’s voice, soft and careful. “Sorry, excuse me, just going to—“
Taehyun is crying laughing now. “You’re going to get jumped one day.”
“By who?” you ask, smug. “The ghost?”
You reach for another shot, laughing, and take a mouthful—
—and then you hear it.
A scrape. A thud. Something knocks against the booth opposite yours, hard enough to rattle the table. The laughter in your throat dies halfway out. Your eyes flick up. The booth opposite shifts, the table leg taps something underneath. There’s the unmistakable sound of someone banging their head on wood.
Your stomach drops, cold and sober.
Taehyun is still laughing, wiping sauce off his fingers, about to say something nasty.
Something moves beneath the opposite table. A head appears. Messy hair. Eyes wide, furious and locked straight on you.
Choi Soobin.
He rises up from under the table as if the floor spat him out—shoulders tense, jaw clenched, face flushed, expression murderous in a way you didn’t even know he was capable of. His shirt is rumpled. His whole vibe screams I have been suffering and now I’ve found the cunt responsible.
You choke. The alcohol goes down the wrong way. You cough so hard your body jerks forward and the shot you just swallowed comes straight back out onto the table—and onto Taehyun’s face.
Taehyun splutters. “What the fuck—”
You keep coughing, eyes watering, throat burning, staring past him. Soobin stands there fully upright now, staring at you with pure intent.
Taehyun grabs a napkin, dabs his face, disgusted. “You’re fucking vile,” he snaps, wiping his cheek. “What is wrong with you?”
You don’t answer—you can’t. Your whole body has gone rigid. Taehyun’s eyes follow your stare. He turns his head.
He clocks Soobin.
The napkin slips out of his hand and drops onto the table.
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a/n: hiiiii my loves! so excited to share this one with you. i have so so so much to yap about and that's why i always put my a/n at the end so you can skip it if you want. okay writing misguided had me laughing, crying, screaming at my screen, pacing around the living room, and the whole jazz. part one was probably the hardest and after re-writing it five times, i threw my hands in the air and called it a day. thankfully the other parts were sm easier to write!! i will say, this is one of of my fav oc's (i love all of them). she's highly inspired by my good friend @matchastwb -- not the swearing part! i won't spoil it but both oc and mei are such soft mochis. i was also inspired by the kdrama head over heels, but just the shaman part because i didn't get past episode one of the kdrama lmao it was a bit too cringe for me but my sister loved it!! i listened to a lot of ABBA and Queen while writing misguided, do check out the playlist if you'd like!! pls let me know your thoughts on oc, taehyun and soobin!! much much love <33
target: you know the drill!! next part dropping at either 400 notes or 17/02!!
review your experience, thoughts, or unhinged feelings here
taglist: request by commenting on the series masterlist or here only please!
∞ Strangers to friends to lovers, university au, slow burn ∞
You chose a boring, quiet job at your campus’s 24-hour library for a reason: it kept you away from drama, gossip, and parties. It was positively uneventful. Until it wasn’t.
so i have the strangest question of all time and i'm going to blame it on the fact that i can't stop bingewatching survivor (and who knows maybe this could become a fic 👀)
you're stranded on a deserted island with one member of bangtan-- who would be the best choice in terms of ensuring your mutual survival? 🏝
seokjin
yoongi
hoseok
namjoon
jimin
taehyung
jungkook
Voting ended onNov 29, 2023
feel free to reblog with additional commentary/reasoning for why you made your choice, or if you want to rank all 7 from "absolutely nothing to worry about" to "oh we're entirely fucked" sdkgnffdjglkj
Reading this while listening to Golden while waiting for a doctor's appointment.
I was thinking, "Huh? 100% sure Yoongi's gonna win this poll"... tapped Yoongi's name and it was almost 50% of the votes. Hell yeah. We are not screaming "Yoongi, Marry me!" for no reason. 😁😊😆 @here2bbtstrash
A day after Seokjin's enlistment, I decided to have a haircut. At first, I decided to have a buzz cut too but my hairdresser declined the idea. She instead offered to get me a pixie cut and if I don't like the result, we can do the buzz cut. But yeah, here I am, loving this short hairstyle I always wanted ever since I was in highschool but was too afraid to get it since my "friends" told me it won't look good on me ('coz I have a round face, large head and chubby body).
Lesson learned: Love yourself. If you love yourself enough, words that are supposed to hurt you won't hurt you at all. Thank you Seokjin for teaching me that. Thank you Bangtan for coming into my life, just when i needed it. 💜