real shit???

my name's makenna and my friends think i have a daddy kink (header/bg cred: @noahverrier)

[shetheyslain]

Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things

[importantcatpics]

more @importantcatpics

[jackkdaniels]

when i was a kid i decided that killing people was bad therefore war was bad therefore the military was evil. and adults would tell me it's more nuanced than that and i would understand when i grew up. well i'm a grown up now and idk i still think that killing people is bad and war is bad and the military is evil

[wajb]

ragebaiting lemonade stand owner with one simple order

[i-am-a-lazy-mess]

hate when I type :) and this 🙂 fucker appears. Go away you evil soul

[crabanarchy]

I can tell my evil advisor has been feeling down lately so I've been pretending to take big sips from his cursed chalice and then roaming the palace grounds groaning and clutching my abdomen. Lowkey I know it's deceptive but I can tell it's really cheering him up. I heard him evilly cackle for the first time in weeks. WIBTA if I keep doing this

[5everandever-deactivated2026050]

[dragon-in-a-fez]

knowing that the past tense of "hang" is "hanged" when it's a method of execution can be very entertaining because you'll be watching a horror movie and someone goes "local legend says a woman was hung in these woods" and you're like "👀 good for her I guess"

[milanesa42]

“The employees need a larger salary” “hmmmm large celery”

[importantcatpics]

[killxbunnyyy]

why ppl leave things in jesus hands knowing he got holes in them, is beyond me

[hotvampireadjacent]

[dogpuppy]

[bewbin]

dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats

[parakeet]

if you go looking for doom and gloom all you will see is doom and gloom. if you go looking for reduced items at the grocery store you may find a littol treat

[so-much-for-subtlety]

[mgmt2]

happens

[uncannyannieg]

moon joy !!!