The Eurovision Crash Course.
Made by an American for other Americans.
So if you have European internet friend or follow blogs run by Europeans, chances are you’ll be come across a lot posts about Eurovision
But what exactly is Eurovision?
I’m sure you’ve already gotten a lot of sarcastic answers, so here’s a quick free crash course in this crazy cultural phenomenon.
It’s a super hardcore song contest that began in 1956 as a way to unite Europe. It began with about seven countries back when TV was just starting to become a thing. It has since expanded to included most of Europe and a number neighboring countries.
Oh, and as of 2015, Australia is one of the contestants too. And it’s one of the most widely watched non-sporting events ever. But never ask a European why America hasn’t been invited. There’s a fairly high chance they’d rather die than have us there to ruin it.
Okay, that’s cool and all, but how exactly does it work?
So each country sends a representative, and people vote for the best. But you can’t vote for your own country. But I’m really not sure if people-voting even matters because each country has a jury that awards points to other countries, and it’s those points that determine who wins Eurovision. Most points wins.
That’s why things can get political, even though it’s not supposed to and Eurovision was founded on the idea of unity. And why it’s possible for song to win the public televote but not the actual contest.
Now! For video examples!
The 10 most recent winners of the Eurovision Song Contest (2007 - 2016)
Pretty self-explanatory. Gives an adequate beginner’s taste of Eurovision performances in general. Showcases genre variety, goofiness, and a poop ton of confetti.
The Story of ESC
Again, pretty self-explanatory. It’s literally just learning about Eurovision: theatrical music-number style!
How to create the perfect Eurovision Performance | Tutorial
A bit of a satirical piece. Fun fact: every goofy thing you see on stage is a reference to an actual performance
And yes, the main people singing are the same singers as the other video.
Important references that the song makes are linked below for your convenience.
The main guy singing won for Sweden in 2015. His performance also includes dancing with cartoons!
The violin guy won for Norway in 2009. He has one of the highest final scores in Eurovision history. He’s also super talented and I love him.
The people in demon costumes won for Finland in 2006. Their song was literally called “Hard Rock Hallelujah.”
Austria set a piano on fire in 2015. And then just left it there. (It starts burning about two minutes into the song.)
Grandmas baking bread. Believe it or not, they got second!
Russia had an famous gold-medalist ice skater onstage in 2008.
And yes, that is a hamster wheel.
…you get the point. If I keep going, this list would carry on forever.
Also! Some of my personal favorites:
ABBA. I’m sure your parents know this song.
Celine Dion. You can skip the first minute and a half.
Just wait for the saxophone part
This one is just goofy.
This guy lays on the floor. Also, he can hit notes in “Chandelier”
Literal Disney princess. On Steroids. Warning: Pastel pink and flowers everywhere.
Actual clothes ripping here. Don’t worry. It’s still safe for work.
Again, I could go on forever, but…you know. Although, if you want more song recommendations, feel free to message me!
(Also, if you’re European and reading this, please don’t kill me. Instead, tell me how I did? And feel free to link your favorite entries too!)
