chance encounters and attractions at first sights and meet cutes are great, but all that is nothing, compared to the normal meetings. the kind where you say hello stranger, the kind that becomes hello i see you're here again wow, the kind that goes oh turns out we'll regularly be stuck with each other. the story of circumstance somehow bringing you closer and closer together. in fanfic this would be the slow burn? is it a slow burn? does that count? perhaps.
meet cutes are sudden, unexpected, and yet somehow it is expected that it has to go somewhere. right away. but with mere circumstance, everything just progresses at a steady pace, where you go from acquaintances who just happen to frequently encounter each other, to friends, to friends that intentionally hang out w each other --
im just here for that slow development, that possibly way overused cliche of the slow realization that hey, oh my god, everything's just growing and now could it be something more? it's that tswift narrative still, that best friends becoming more trope, and i would like to argue that it is these sorts of relationships, the kinds where the foundation is completely pure and honest and not trying, that are the best kinds because you do get to see less filters when the getting to know stage wasnt with the intention of getting into the other's pants.
you know what i want? i want to keep hanging out with someone, and get so used to the just being with that someone, and be real friends with that someone. and something like watching a movie together, and how he'd take your hand, and somehow in that moment, you know, that this is the point where you might be breaking the friendship boundary. how i would say, you know we probably should talk about this. and the conversation would revolve around the risk that being 'more than friends' would entail, but how beautiful it is because really, you saw a side to this person that you would never have seen if the set up from the beginning was a landi.
what do you want out of this, why now, is this for real -- things i would probably want to clarify. i would probably admit, you know, i am not averse to the possibility... with emphasis on the ellipsis..... longer pauses. suggestive. we could... try... or not. like, not try too hard, you know, let's not make this too awkward.
you'd start with taking my hand. you would know what i like, i would too. we talked about this before, back when everything was open and friendly conversation. it may or may not have been the dropping of hints part. there is the awkward. the walks that used to be filled conversation about anything and everything become silence. is it because you've run out of things to say?? there is this recognition that this time, the set up changed. how does one navigate all this, i would wonder. one would break the ice, pretend that nothing changed... because really, nothing much changed, except the feelings are now out in the open.
the people around you were probably secretly shipping you. probably knew it before you did. were waiting for it. wondering if the narrative is going to be the totga kind. there is going to be relief that gahd finally.
you know i would really like the discreetness of everything. that way you would lightly brush your fingers against mine when we walk. or how this time, when we cross the street, you hold onto my arm or lay your hand on my shoulder as if to guide me. or maybe one time, in a rush to cross a busy street you would just. take my hand. like some kdrama scene. little beginnings.
the hangouts become dates. how you become slightly more protective, because this time things are clearer. they're okay. yes, you can act that way. standing inside a crowded mrt, and how i no longer hang onto the metal poles, but on your arm. how you steady me during those moments of inertia with that sudden arm around my waist, and you would have retreated almost immediately if not for me, hand on yours, keeping that arm in place. because yes i want that there.
how easy things are really, all that needs to be done is to spend time with each other, just hang out. together. activities we have always enjoyed with each other. we would bingewatch movies together while sipping some homemade cocktail, and end up napping while cuddling together. all this in private ofcourse. you know how everything just becomes comfortable, and actually it is so easy to be truly comfortable with this person, because you did start out as friends. it's pretty much the same thing, except this time you're seated closer to each other, you're cuddling, you're holding hands...
...i would take a moment to lean my head onto your shoulder, something i never would have done if we were just friends. i would probably be brave? daring? enough to kiss your hand. that's the only first kiss move i would be willing to take. who knows. but of course i would like it a lot if you move in slowly. everything in slow motion, learning as one goes. fingers tangling in your hair, that slight giggle, i know im messing up your hairstyle, i dont care you're cute anyway haha. pause.
theres the realization that kissing involves hands touching the other's face, and for once you dont care about that breakout, because he doesnt care, and it just happens. the fingers let go of the hair, stay wrapped around his neck, while his move down, slowly, tentatively, down to your waist. how i would pull closer, my hands gripping your shirt by the collar...
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