MARTIN TIME!

My name's Martin, Martin Cliff. Ya can ask me things. Don't waste ya opportunity folks!

[martincliffontheweb]

been a while since I posted any Martin art so have some Martin crumbs!

I am ridiculously in love with this man/j

[martincliffontheweb]

Hi folks

I am a pleasure to have at wedding and won’t set anything on fire at all you can trust me

[martincliffontheweb]

bonk

Hi I don’t know how I got here do you have ibuprofen

-M.D (ykw. I’m not a doctor I’m not a doctor)

just took the last of it, so no.

if you have a headache, try screaming at the top of your lungs. It doesn’t help but it bothers the neighbors.

[martincliffontheweb]

Hey dude so what if I were to give you exactly 20 milligrams of Ibuprofen, what would you do with it? (sorry being random)

That’s actually not much, so it wouldn’t have too much of an effect. I’d ask for more because I have a fuckin skull-splitter of a headache man

[martincliffontheweb]

Martin I have a suspicion you would get along with a certain fictional slightly cannibalistic chef from a video game

-M D (ykw)

He’s a cannibal by choice, I’m a cannibal because I have no other options, there’s a difference.

But yeah both me and Vince run a restaurant and are wild ass dudes in our 20’s sooo-

[martincliffontheweb]

do you know what hatsune miku is??? im wondering because you looki like you would listen to her :]

Hatsune Mike? Never hearda her.

*he says as he’s holding a miku plushie*

[martincliffontheweb]

/Jacks eyes stop on one text and he switches back to speaking English./

Jack “Goddamn it. Worst time to be out of my country ever.”

/He puts his phone away and looks at Martin./

Jack “so, you got a house near here or somethin’?”

take a wild fuckin guess, Sherlock. Yeah, I do, im just lost.

[martincliffontheweb]

Jack “…1929 年の株式市場の暴落は私という人間にどのような関係があるのでしょうか?”

(mod note; I’m actually trying to learn Japanese I’m just really rusty so this was translated)

/He reaches into his bag, taking out his phone as he swipes through messages and missed call after missed call. Not breaking eye contact./

Jack “私の母は日本で生まれ、私は日本に住んでいます。 もちろん日本語を話します。”

… how bout I pretend I understand whatever the fuck you just said.

someone’s tried to teach me Japanese, but I can barely have a passable conversation, let alone understand what other people say.

[martincliffontheweb]

jack “I haven’t watched chicken little since I was..”

/He takes a deep breath./

Jack “let’s just say I haven’t seen it.”

/He looks to the right, thinking of what elective he took. He then looks to the left./

Jack “I think I took forensic science.”

fuckin nerd! I took band. I played alto saxophone.

what’s your opinion on the stock market crash of 1929?

Oh and since you live in Japan, do you speak any Japanese?

[martincliffontheweb]

/Jack shakes his head/

Jack “yeah.”

Jack “no. No way. Being immortal isn:t even that great, I still feel pain. And yes. I am single. But I am very busy with my case and want nothing to do with romance.”

oh, well sucks to suck.

…

how many times do you think chicken little screamed “the sky is falling”?

I’m judging you based on your answer to this by the way

[martincliffontheweb]

Jack “I’m 30. My favourite colour is red, and I jumped off a building at 25 and lived.”

/He flicks a bug off of his shoulder, picking it up./

Jack “people like to put these things on me. Trackers.”

so, you can’t die? That’s fucking sick! My favorite color is red as well. I’m 27 and ever since a car crash when I was about 20 I felt a strong hunger, an urge to tear into human flesh. You saw what happens if I don’t, Jack. You can’t die. I need to eat people… how would you like to become an organ donor?

you’d be donating your organs to me of course.

[yourfavoritecuntist]

I meant to test out animation and-

It’s a short Martin animation that took like 40 minutes because I was just learning how to animate

[martincliffontheweb]

Holy balls it’s me!!!

[martincliffontheweb]

/Jack shakes Martin’s hand. His face held in a forced, angry smile. He pulls Martin by the hand and whispers into his ear./

Jack “I have been alive more than 5 years too long and if I had any jurisdiction here I would put you in jail right now.”

/He then releases Martin and smiles./

Jack “Lucky for you I don’t!”

Has anyone ever told you how feminine your smile looks? Sorry, hate to ruin any possible chance of self esteem.

But anyways,

how old are you?

what’s your favorite color?

how does one manage to be alive for “5 five years too long?”

Please get an answer back to me in 3 - 5 business days.

[martincliffontheweb]

/Jack shrugs, rummaging through his bag. He throws out bags of evidence. Incident reports. A few papers in Japanese./

Jack “Nope.”

/he looks at the bleeding artery. He wou-no- should be dead./

Jack “Wish I could help.”

so… The whole fact that I have eaten parts of your body still hasn’t affected you? Damn your weird… but I guess I am too… say, most people die when I do that. They squeal like a little bitch first, but they die. Why didn’t you?

wait… we’re both…

ha.. ha… ha…

guess I’m not alone.

guess we’re both human monsters, what do ya say, Jack?

/Martin extends his hand to shake Jacks/

[martincliffontheweb]

/Jack doesn’t really flinch, but does wince at the pain. Hurts like a bitch. He kicks Martin off of him, rolling away and standing up quickly, reaching into his bag, now on the ground, as he pulls out a blood bag./

Jack “would’ve kept this for a blood transfusion but uh- you want it?”

/He seems rather unfazed by Martin but he knows underneath that that he could fully be dead./

wait… really? I-I’m fine now but… thanks…

/he takes the blood bag and chugs it like an energy drink. He tosses it in the woods. The horror! Not only has he ruined multiple families by murdering people, he ALSO litters!? get this man to federal prison!/

so. Do you also got a spare wash cloth on ya?

[martincliffontheweb]

Didn’t you find it strange? The way Jack fell from the sky and lived?

How he pushed a disfigured limb back into place so easily?

Take a bite from his arm. See what happens. The worst he can do is TRY to arrest you. Like he said, he works for Japan. He has no power here. He can’t stop you.

-C

/Martin smiles again as he goes for jacks arm. He rips into the veins and pops a vital artery. He violently rips his arm open and mauls. When he’s done, he comes back to natural consciousness, covered in blood./

Jesus fucking Christ… well this has gotten extremely awkward. I am off to go wash myself off in the river. The pussies at the local detective agency can’t handle a little blood, so I’ll wash it off for them.

/Martin walks a random direction in the woods and immediately walks right back/

oh right, forgot that I’m lost in the middle of gumfuck nowhere Massachusetts…

[martincliffontheweb]

/Jack groans. There’s another tear in his ear. As blood gushes out he seems unaffected./

Jack “Okay. Cannibalism. Gotcha.”

/He should have worked that out, being the great detective he is./

Jack “that’s on me. Also. WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR.”

/Martin seems to snap back to reality for a second/

you think I can CONTROL this shit?! I dont want to eat you! Well I do- besides the point… listen… this shit doesn’t stop unless I eat human flesh or maybe like some blood. Only reason I’m speaking right now is cause of your ear. Tasted great, though have you considered cutting back on cholesterol?

/Martin starts to act up. He looks for an opening in jacks body. Attempts to use his body weight to tackle Jack to the ground and tear at the flesh on his shoulder/