the world keeps spinning around

“Wherever you go becomes a part of you somehow.”― Anita Desai

[mclting]

“Wherever they might be they always remember that the past was a lie, that memory has no return, that every spring gone by could never be recovered, and that the wildest and most tenacious love was an ephemeral truth in the end.” ― Gabriel Garcia Marquez

.♡    — 𝙈𝙀𝙀𝙏 𝘾𝙀𝙈𝙍𝙀: introduction and connections .♡    — 𝙈𝙀𝙀𝙏 𝙀𝙕𝙍𝘼𝙆: introduction and connections

[maddisonjxizani]

[dcmsonidris]

I’ll come by your house tomorrow. If you want anything, leave a note for me.

Sonsuz Aşk (2017)

[mclting]

. 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑: cemre sunar

location: town's square time: saturday afternoon status: closed for @exulcnsis — winter carver

Going out for a day to take a walk by the town. Sometimes it was hard pretending that everything is normal, Cemre almost envied other people in town that had no clue about what was happening between the clubs. When it came to her, she was constantly worrying if at any point they’d figure out that she was researching them and assume that she was a threat. Hopefully not! She was constantly afraid and, yet, that wasn’t something that refrained her from continuing her personal project. In fact, she appreciated taking Zeus for a walk from time to time because it gave her the chance to pay attention to people in Lancaster, get to know others, learn more about the population that was willing to talk to a stranger.

It was in the middle of paying attention to someone else’s conversation that she only felt Zeus pushing forward which caused her to lose her grip of his leash and watch as he would run straight to someone else. “Zeus!” She exclaimed, watching until he’d stop, inches away from bumping against someone. Promptly Cemre reached closer to the blonde. “I’m so, so sorry. I swear that Zeus won’t bite, unless he feels threatened and that’s not the case. Apparently he really liked you! To the point of wanting to run away from his own owner.”

[pcrsephonies]

ever since meeting cemre about a year ago, it had been hard keeping herself away from the newcomer mother and her child. there was a sense of protectiveness that fell over aysel, as if wanting to keep the duo away from everything that lancaster had mean to her in the past, and everything that the town could mean to them. the story of her fiance had not gone easy on her, but who the hell was aysel to tell others how to live their love lives, right? lucky for her, she had gained a friend in all of this chaos, so she didn't really care about what had cost for that to happen. as selfish as that might have been.

"i have five, actually." aysel replied with a soft chuckle as she pulled her hair away from her neck, showing a dandelion being blown by the wind. "this was the first one i did. i want to cover it up with something else, but i haven't decided what just yet. this one is hard to cover up..." she said pointing to the snake with red abstract flowers between her breasts that was almost always on display due to aysel's taste for clothes that exposed her chest in a sensual way. "the other three are in less exposed places." she explained. the brunette would have no problem showing the other her inked body, but she would also leave it up to cemre. "i have a black garter belt on my right thigh, a crown and skull on my ribs, and kiss mark on my groin. silly, i know." she laughed softly. the only one that actually had a deeper meaning, was the garter belt, which she had it made to cover the scar she'd given herself while trying to deal with her own troubled adolescence.

cemre's nervousness was cute, actually. it made ayself cherish these moments of normalcy even more. "baby girl, i'd hold your hand to the end of the world if you asked me to." although her tone was a playful one, aysel wasn't entirely sure she was actually joking about it. "why don't you take a look at the artists flash tattoos? maybe you'll find something small to get starter with, or some inspiration. what would you get for deniz? his initials? the letter d could be one side of a heart or something." she suggested. "honestly, it's better to talk to the artist. i'm horrible at these things."

[mclting]

“See? I’m talking to someone who already knows what it's like to get a tattoo. I’m so nervous that I didn’t even notice the dandelion before, silly me!” Cemre giggled. “I wanted to get one back when I moved to Los Angeles, it’d have been my own way of marking my independence but then there’s the lack of money, trying to get used to a new city and trying to get a job, and eventually everything builds up and something that didn’t have utter importance gets forgotten.”

She could add to her discourse that she got pregnant and her priority became Deniz to the point that every time she had more money than expected, it’d go straight to his savings or to anything she needed to get him. Then, the mention of holding her hand caused Cemre to smile. “You’ll make me blush, you know that. Still– I appreciate it. Whenever I don’t have my siblings around, I get to be… you know, vulnerable, so I can ask someone to hold my hand instead of being the one offering it.” It was one of the challenges she faced ever since her first sibling was born. Not only she placed herself into a pedestal of perfection, it seemed she was the one to take care of her siblings, and eventually, her son.  

“Yeah– it’d either be his initial or his date of birth. And, by the way, you should visit us anytime soon. I’m sure he’d love to be here right now, because he adores you and he’d find it all very entertaining. I’m sure,” to the point that he’d probably state that he wanted to get a tattoo as well. “But yeah– maybe a heart and something for him, why not make it two at once? That way in case I hate how much it hurts, I don’t need to go through that experience ever again.” She chuckled. "And, what do you want to do next? Because we can't drink, can we? We could get ice cream or some dessert..."

[hallucinaticn]

Making friendly with someone he'd safely deemed outside of the realm of madness was a dangerous move to make, even more so with Deniz not ever lingering too far behind. His first run in with the small family of two hadn't been so friendly, but in the end, he couldn't have blamed her for knocking loudly at three in the morning in hopes of getting him to shut off his music. Music meant to fuel his every thought, to get his blood pumping just enough to aid the determination that flowed through his veins. If he wanted the story, he had to work for it, and working for it meant more than staying tucked away in his apartment.

Though, with big pieces of the puzzle having been dropped before him, now it was about seeing how those pieces fit together. He'd kept his musical motivation at an honest limit, only pushing it from time to time before a reminder in a few taps against the shared wall was warning sign of what happened if he didn't listen. To spare them both the same frustrated back and forth, he never pushed it.

The innocence that was her son was a reminder that it wasn't only himself he put in danger by diving deeper into the town of Lancaster and the chaos that brewed beneath everyone's noses. Thankfully, no one had to know he was friendly with his neighbor next door.

"If I'm willing? Hell yeah," he countered, though a quick apology was mouthed in the woman's direction. Language. Clearly he had work to do on that. "Well, if you're sure that I won't be intruding... sign me up. I've never had pizza and wine before." The jury was still out on whether or not he'd stick around for a movie, but after seeing a woman he'd never expected to cross paths with again, he needed a reminder that not everything was burning slowly around him.

Chin tipped upwards as he watched her small frame round the corner and into the kitchen. Step for step, he navigated the living area before he sat the box atop the coffee table and grinned as Deniz sat on the opposite side. "So, what was this about sharing something with me?"

[mclting]

Cemre rolled her eyes playfully once the word ‘hell’ escaped from her neighbor’s mouth. Still, she accepted the apology. It was hard sometimes to remember that children shouldn’t be in touch with a few words here and there; even Cemre herself would forget that sometimes. 

You’re the coolest, Mr. Murphy. Okay, okay, let me see… While her son was taking a look at his book, Cemre was already laughing; hardly because those jokes were incredibly funny, but because she could see the excitement written all over Deniz’s face. Having Kieran next door had been helpful ever since moving to a new town. She missed all the friends she had gathered back in Los Angeles, to make new relationships and understand they could be as good as the others, it was important for her. “Kieran hardly got inside our apartment and you’re already throwing jokes his way?” Deniz nodded. I got one! Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?

“Oh, I’ve heard that one before.” Cemre stated. “I have Montepulciano and Cabernet wine which are both great choices with pizza. And of course, for sweet Deniz I have grape juice, so he won’t feel left out.” She stated, kissing the top of Deniz’s head prior to aiming with slow tread in the kitchen’s direction. “It’s mostly a matter of you’ll never know until you try, but I think you’ll like it. Unless you hate wine, then… sorry?” Grabbing the glasses, Cemre prepped the table, giving a few instructions here and there for Deniz to help her with plates and cutlery.

“The pizza smells great, doesn’t it, D?” The big bright eyes followed the big smile before Deniz stated a loud ‘yes’. “Sharing something with you? Is that your way of deviating from answering my question?” She questioned playfully. “People say that mothers have a horrible memory after giving birth, so I’ll put the blame on that and tell you that you need to give me more information than that so I can remember the subject.” Opening the box, it was easier to serve both herself and Deniz with a slice of pizza. “And thank you for this, really. It was a nice surprise, after all.”

[pcrsephonies]

𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫 — 𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐔𝐄𝐋 𝐀𝐃𝐋𝐀𝐖𝐀𝐍

— setting: last call ; evening — availability: closed starter for cemre sunar | ( @mclting )

having cemre around was not only painful to him, but it also made sam live on the edge. like he was going to wake up one day with the news that something had happened to them... that it had been his fault, but, all things considered, he couldn't be upfront with cemre and tell her things about the club. they had been there for a year, and they didn't seem to be leaving, so, the only thing that samuel could do now was to deal with it. try to keep her away while also trying to keep his own feelings at bay.

so, he hit other women's beds searching for relief, he hit the bar looking for oblivion, he hit several punch bags at the gym trying to dissipate the stress, but nothing seemed to work out right for him.

that evening, it was even harder to forget her presence. their anniversary had always been a synonym of good things—but as of the past year, things had turned sour. so here he was, turning himself to another bar to numb the pain, but life seemed to want to laugh at sam's face, because standing by the bar, was the woman who he once had been able to love freely.

he could notice her discomfort with the other man's advances from miles away, but it still took samuel an extra heartbeat to make a decision and step in to intervene. "hey man, didn't you hear the lady say no?" he easily stepped back into her fiance's shoes, his arm draping around her shoulders. "hey, babe, sorry i'm late. it was hard to find a spot to park. d'you want to maybe grab a booth?" he asked her, hoping cemre wouldn't smack him or something. his gaze moved to the other man, who still stood there. "are you lost or something?" he asked, but was already pulling cemre away from the man and towards one of the booths, his arm only dropping from her shoulders once they got there. "are you alright?"

[mclting]

There was a temptation to occupy her mind throughout that entire day, which led to countless hours of research and, eventually, a change of routine that led her to the nearest bar. It was foolish of herself to pretend the memories of what she used to have with Samuel were in the past. After all, she didn’t move to a whole new town out of pure boredom. Yes, it was important for Deniz to be around his father, yes. But she had begun her research due to her ex-fiancé and the sudden departure of Sam from their lives. In the end love would endure despite the strings cut along the way. And that day was simply a harsh remembrance of what she used to have and what she didn’t have anymore. 

The liquor poured over her glass, burned her throat and she wanted to pretend that solitude was a good friend that day, but it really wasn’t. However, life found a way to teach her a lesson, to make her understand that despite the somberness tagging along with being by herself it was better than the company of someone that was mostly disturbing her peace. It didn’t matter the amount of attempts to make him leave her, of course it’d take another man for him to let her be. Cemre just could never imagine that the man in this picture was also the one that once caused her heart to beat faster: Sam. In this scenario, he was the causative of her heart skipping a beat. 

Cemre was unable to form a sentence during the argument between Sam and the stranger, she mostly remained in silence watching until the stranger let her be. Because, deep down, it was all too much. Part of herself wondered if the one drink she had had was already causing her to hallucinate Sam. Yet, he was there. She only knew that he was truly there due to his arm wrapping around her shoulder. And finally, once he gave her personal space back, it was the first time that Cemre actually felt she was breathing, that she could say something. “Uhn… thank you. I'm alright, yes.” She wanted to leave, but she felt the other person still watching her from afar. In case that man didn’t believe both herself and Sam that they were together, he could still try to bother her. Which meant: leaving wasn’t an option either.

“Can I–” she stared down to his hand, and in a way she didn’t want to think too much about it. Although she asked for permission first, she ended up holding his hand and dragging him to the nearest available booth. “I’m so tired of weirdos and creep guys. Can a woman just go to a bar and have some fun?” She sighed, finally resting her back against her seat. “Do you mind keeping me company until that freaking guy forgets about my existence? I will leave you by yourself as soon it’s safe. I just wanted to have a few drinks, honestly." To forget the one that was now in front of her.

[lucianaortiz]

Most of her friends were considered social friends, having no one in her life that she trusted to be too close to her and the secrets she held deep, but out of all of the social friends she had, Cemre was one she'd grown fond of the most. Tales of motherhood and how her son was doing caused a curiosity to grow within Flora, wondering what life would be like being a mom, her own mother not the shining example of what motherhood could be like when you actually cared about your kid. She'd once considered having kids, every time one came into the emergency room with a stomach ache, but the thought hadn't even dared to cross her mind since she married Xavier a year ago, too focused on showing the world how in love she was with the man to even consider how having kids would work.

"It sounds terrifying, being a mom. You're way stronger than I could ever be," Flora reassured her friend, showing interest in what the woman had to share, even if the other didn't think life with her son was all that interesting now that he was half-grown. "Xavier and I have been married a year and we haven't even started talking about kids yet, with his workload and mine, I'm not sure when we would ever have the time." She offered Cemre a light shrug, picking up the glass of wine in front of her and taking a long sip, needing the encouragement to pretend like she and her husband were in some kind of fairytale love story. "To being an adult and drinking wine," Flora laughed softly, holding her glass out to tap the other's, a smile on her lips. "So, you're telling me there hasn't been anyone that's caught your eye? You're absolutely stunning, I'm not sure how your door isn't being knocked down by millions of potential suitors."

[mclting]

The sound that escaped her lips once she heard the word: ‘stronger’ was merged by a brief laugh. Not that she was mocking her friend, it was far from it. In a way she was belittling her own self, because Cemre wouldn’t describe herself as stronger in any way. “Oh, dear– if you only knew. But it is terrifying, every single day you’re just more preoccupied and focused on your child than the day before, so yeah– I don’t remember the last time I only thought about myself.” Even the decision of moving to Lancaster had Deniz as part of it. To have him closer to his father and make sure that despite anything that was going on in the life of Samuel wouldn’t backfire on their child. And then, listening to Flora, Cemre nodded. “If it makes you feel any more frightened, I didn’t plan on having Deniz. He just happened. At that time, I wasn’t even dating. Anyway… chaotic. You may see me now as this centered woman, who is raising a kid and doing her best, but I was a completely different version of myself back then.” Her lips curved upwards sharing a short smile, a genuine one prior to continuing. “Either way, if you ever want to be a mother, I’m here for you to vent about all the challenges that come along with it.” 

“For now… to ‘being an adult and drinking wine’,” clinking her glass against Floras’s, Cemre took a sip from it, savoring the wine and remaining silent for a second while listening to her friend. “I wish. Maybe being too pretty makes others afraid of me?” She was joking, clearly. It was transparent through her humorous tone. “I think I just haven’t had the time to go out there and live this part of my life? Besides, I hate those dating apps. They are awful. You should count yourself lucky that you’re now happily married and you don’t need to go through all of this anymore.”

[crookedroads]

“They’ve tried to put me on break longer when they saw me this morning,” she said with a laugh. Mia had gotten up early enough to start some of the process of opening, as much as she could with her stiff shoulder. She had been cleared for physio and that was good enough for her. It wasn’t that they weren’t happy to see her, Mia had never been a hard boss, that was how she wanted to run her business. John had called her too soft at first and it was true that some had tried to take advantage of her but that was the thing with Mia, just because she was nice didn’t mean she let anyone walk all over her. Now the coffee shop had been a fixture in town for long enough that people knew it was a good place to work, if they were willing to put in the effort. Not that making coffee was that hard, but the shifts could feel exhausting when it was busy.

“Went 32 years without that kind of injury, guess it was my turn.” There was more depth to her words than the other could ever know. First it had been Jacob, than her older brother following by their father. Until then, Mia had been the only Fleming physically unscathed by all of this and she wasn’t so sure it had been a blessing more than a curse. “I’ve got just the thing. We received the blend a few days ago. It’s a little bit strong but it has a nice touch of dark chocolate and citrus in it.”

[mclting]

“I won’t say that they were in the wrong for attempting to do so, because honestly I’d act just the same. Blame me for becoming a mom and eventually trying to ‘mom’ everybody,” Cemre returned with a chuckle. It was a bad habit, whenever she’d be out with friends or if she was actually with her son, it was part of herself to worry. Ever since the fateful day she discovered about her pregnancy. Sometimes, Cemre would wonder if she neglected her overprotective self by moving to Lancaster, some other part of herself trying to comfort that voice by stating she would do anything she could to protect her son from whatever was happening in town. Worst case scenario, Deniz would get a ticket straight back to Turkey to be protected by his grandparents if needed. 

Raising an eyebrow, Cemre nodded. “Let’s hope that’s the first and only, shall we?” Cemre disliked getting injured, she wasn’t really a fan of hospitals anyway. Every single time her son was sick, the atmosphere only made it all worse. “Oh– that sounds incredibly delicious! You’re my person now, that’s it. I’d usually go for tea back in my home city, but ever since moving to Los Angeles and well– now here, coffee has been my main option.” Maybe that was her body’s way of declining any sort of homesick emotion she could feel. “I’m Cemre, by the way.”

[forgetmcnotts]

Maybe we’ve both gone mad.

1899 | The Pyramid (1.06)

[pcrsephonies]

( @mclting — )

[mclting]

. 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑: cemre sunar

location: skin deep time: friday afternoon status: closed for @pcrsephonies — aysel karademir

Although the woman was aware she had passed the window of becoming reckless after a breakup, it didn’t mean she couldn’t live up a little bit. It had been awhile ever since her engagement was over, and during that meanwhile Cemre hadn’t had time to either dye her hair or come up with a tattoo. Perhaps all it took was the right friendship to go for something slightly audacious. And she found it once she moved to Lancaster. “Do you have any tattoos already?” Cemre questioned her friend, while walking by the sidewalk. It was a matter of time until they’d reach the establishment anyway. Cemre assumed it’d be quick and then she could go back home to continue researching about all the reasons behind moving to a new town. But, for that particular moment, she would focus on the present and having the presence of a friend. 

“I’m mostly asking because I wanted to know how much it’s going to hurt. I should just go for something small, right? A tiny heart or a tiny flower, maybe something for my son?” That was Cemre Sunar overthinking anything that would be an important decision. She would start rambling and asking questions. In those moments she’d understand that Deniz was just like her. And, perhaps, his curiosity was even more perceptive than hers. “If I ask you to hold my hand would that be too embarrassing?”

[mclting]

. 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑: cemre sunar

location: wild thyme time: friday, 7pm status: closed for @rebelycll — shay westwood

Cemre was heading out to get something to eat, as Deniz would have a sleepover party at his friend’s house and — after digging a lot about the child’s family —, she was comfortable leaving him with them for a night. It had been a stressful week, one that caused her to deviate from any thoughts to stay at home, and see where that night could lead her; at least, be able to have a night out without worrying about everything that was happening in town and pretend that life was normal, like she had always assumed it was. 

And then, since she already expected her night to take a turn and give her some sort of interesting outcome. It happened.

Her eyes landed at someone already inside the restaurant and despite shock being written all over her expression, Cemre decided to reach closer. She wasn’t going insane, was she? People would change as time passed by, but how she looked just the same. “Shay?” Cemre exclaimed, hoping that she wouldn’t make a fool out of herself. “I can’t believe that is actually you! How long has it been?” Oh, too long. To the point that updating anyone she had met back in college would give them plenty to talk about. At least, in case she wasn’t wrong, Cemre now had some company for dinner.

[mclting]

. 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑: ezrak gülen

location: wonderland time: saturday, 9pm status: closed for @rebelycll— andrea romero

Glances from the past gave him enough of a reason to adventure himself to a different establishment than his usual — as ‘The Dive’ was the bar that he’d usually feel comfortable to be at. Ezrak observed his surroundings while being within the Wonderland, watching as others would slowly shift their personality once liquor caused its consequences and people would be able to enjoy the rhythm of the song. On the other hand, he found himself sitting by the bar, with his eyes still landing on the same figure that had caught his attention a few nights ago.

Maybe he also needed that liquor courage, but it was in the act of actually ordering one that he found enough of an excuse to engage in a conversation with the bartender behind the bar. “What would you recommend to me that would still be close to ordering a beer? I know– I know, I’m the boring person that always goes for beer. But what can I say? A safe bet.”

[mclting]

. 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑: ezrak gülen

location: blast time: saturday morning status: closed for @exulcnsis— riggs maddow

It was all he needed. A full hour of training in which his mind was completely focused on his opponent, while practicing to become even better at fights. Anyone that would’ve met Ezrak back in his teenage years would never assume that this was the man he had become; yet, he was proud of himself. People couldn’t understand the reasons behind joining a club, and acting in favor of the Wild Coyotes, but they became his family, they became important to him the moment he saw that it was important to Alaya as well. 

The person in front of him held that meaning wholeheartedly. Riggs was a friend, even if Ezrak hardly used that word out loud. “Listen, I will say that I could beat your ass, just for the sake of my own ego. But if I was to be completely honest, I'd say that I’m getting there… in a couple of months.” Or maybe years. Ezrak was strong, they were just at different levels. “But it was good practice, right? I needed that, well– either that or beer. But I guess some would say it's still too early for that.”

[dcmsonidris]

Sonsuz Aşk (2017)

[aslibekroglu]

ALPEREN DUYMAZ ERKEK SEVERSE (2022- )

[mclting]

. 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑: ezrak gülen

location: outside of SOIF time: weekend, around 7pm status: closed for @pcrsephonies — samuel adlawan

Still uncertain if the rage boiling within himself was due to Alaya’s birthday reaching closer, or simply the resting nature of his being throughout all those years. Ezrak knew — or, at least,  his subconscious was aware that it was a matter of time until he’d either implore or explode. And it took, meeting a drunk man on his way for him to decide that another wrong step coming from a stranger, would easily lead to a fight. He wasn’t afraid of it. Loss made him brave, and fear was just an observer of his life nowadays. Fortunately, life had different plans, because while Ezrak stared at the other person waiting for a storm to come, his peripheral vision noticed his brother-in-law.

And that was the moment, Ezrak restrained himself from doing anything he could regret. “Just leave,” he stated, barely opening his mouth to allow words to be shared. And, eventually, he walked closer to Samuel. “I need a drink, you need a drink, right?” He tapped Samuel’s shoulder, aiming for the bar’s door and opening it for his brother. “Your job is paying you well to buy some fancy suits and maybe a fancy drink for your brother? Should we get you something extra?”