“I want mama!” your son screams, tears filling up his eyes—the same color as Nanami’s.
And speaking of Nanami…he feels helpless.
The boy won’t stop crying, won’t stop calling for you. His little face is red and scrunched up, his cheeks wet, chest heaving with each shaky breath. You’d told him you’d be gone for a few hours—explained it gently, with a kiss to his forehead and a promise that Papa would take care of everything. But none of it seemed to matter.
You’re gone and his world feels like it’s ended.
“Please, baby…Mum will be back any time soon.” Nanami spares a glance at the clock, in thirty minutes you’d be here. “Should we finish your meal in the meantime, mh?” He tries, voice tight, panic folding over his usual calm.
But your son only screams louder, fists pounding the highchair tray, tears flowing freely.
It’s been hours, and Nanami has come to the conclusion that : he doesn’t want me.
He stares at his son’s red, tear-slicked face. There’s no hatred in it, just unfiltered, helpless longing.
“I want Mamaaaaaa!!” Nanami flinches. Exactly, the toddler is longing for you.
The little boy’s small chest rises and falls in erratic sobs, hiccupping on the edge of breathlessness.
Nanami exhales slowly through his nose. You can do this, he tells himself. You’re his father. You can do this.
So, he tries.
He pulls out the little wooden train you carved together one weekend. Places it on the floor. “Do you want to show Papa how fast it goes again?” he asks, voice as gentle as possible.
No response.
He tries the animal book—the one with flaps and texture that always make him giggle. “Tell Papa where’s the lion. Can you find the lion for me?”
Nothing.
Just a heartbreaking, hoarse little “Mama…”
Nanami even tries to put on the cartoon with the talking blue bear. The one your son usually dances to.
As nothing seems to work, Kento feels his heart breaking inch by inch. He picks him up despite the flailing little arms, holds him against his chest, firm but not tight, like you’ve teached him.
His son won’t stop. Not even a little. The screams turn into an open-mouthed wail, the kind that turns cheeks purple and voices raw for hours.
Nanami’s hands tremble slightly. He sits down on the floor with the boy in his lap, gently cradling him, head bowed. He’s never felt this powerless.
Not during cursed missions, not under pressure—but here, in his own home, with his child breaking apart in his arms… He feels not enough.
Not soft enough.
Not warm enough.
Not you.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers into the crown of his son’s head. “I’m trying. Papa’s trying so hard.”
And that’s when the front door creaks open. “I’m home!”
And just like that, your son’s head snaps up from where he’s been sobbing into Nanami’s lap. Your husband doesn’t even have the time to rise to his feet that the boy is squirming violently in his arms, “mama! Mama! MAMA!!” Nanami lets him go without resistance. He stands slowly as your son flings himself into your arms when you appear in the doorway.
Concern is written all over your face. “I’m here, baby. I’m here…” you look up and see Nanami standing a few feet away, shoulders sagging, eyes tired behind his glasses.
“he’s been crying for hours,” he says softly. “didn’t want anything from me. Wouldn’t eat. Wouldn’t play.”
You nod as your rubs your son’s back. “I’m sorry. He’s just been going through this clingy phase.”
“I know.” Nanami offers a tired smile, though it doesn’t reach his eyes. “it’s okay.”
Later, after dinner and a bath your son is finally asleep, curled on your side of the shared bed, clutching one of your shirts tightly, your sent comforting him.
Nanami stands in the doorway, arms crosses, watching the soft rise and fall of your kid. You come up behind him, circling his waist with your arms, letting your cheek rest on his strong back.
One of his hands intertwin with yours. “He wouldn’t even let me hold him,” he says, barely above a whisper. “I’ve never felt that…useless before.”
“Kento…”
“I know he’s still small. I know it’s not personal. But…” he pauses, swallowing hard. “I tried everything. Toys, books, food, music. He didn’t want any of it. It felt like…like…I wasn’t enough. I wasn’t…probably am, not a good dad.”
Your heart twists at the words. “Can you please turn to face me, love?”
He lets out a deep exhale, like the breath hurts to let go, and turns. When his eyes meet yours, you feel like the weight of the whole world just collapsed onto your chest.
Nanami is silently crying.
His eyes are rimmed red, and cheeks drenched wet.
You gently cup his jaw. “You were more than enough Kento. You held him even when he didn’t want to be held. You didn’t get angry. You didn’t walk away. You didn’t even raise your voice once. That’s not just ‘enough’. That’s what a good dad does. That’s love.”
He closes his eyes, leaning into your touch as more tears gather in his long blonde lashes. “I just…” his voice breaks. “I just wanted to be what he needed.”
Nanami wraps his arms around you tighter, letting his forehead drop to your shoulder. He breathes into your neck, letting your sent comforting him—just like his son does.
“I don’t mind not being the favorite,” he murmurs after a while, his voice quiet and raw. “But I hope, one day, he’ll reach for me too.”
You press a kiss the top of his head, pulling him impossibly closer to you. “He will. And when he does…he won’t want to let go.”
“you think i don’t care about you?” he’d growled hours ago, sharp as razors.
you hadn’t flinched. you’d just looked at him with red-rimmed eyes and whispered, “you don’t act like it.”
and that had fucking stuck. even now, hours later, as you lay beneath him, breathless and quiet, he still heard it echoing through his skull. you don’t act like it. not when he bit, not when he barked, not when he used your body like it was the only thing he could touch without breaking.
but you were still here. still letting him climb between your legs, still looking at him with wary hope like maybe this time would be different. and he was trying.
fuck, he was trying.
he cupped your face like it was fragile, like you were fragile, and not the only goddamn thing in the world that made him feel human. his thumbs brushed your cheeks, lingering under your eyes.
“still mad at me?” he asked, rough, but not cruel.
your throat moved when you swallowed. “i’m just tired.”
that made something behind his ribs ache. a thing that shouldn’t have existed. not in him. not like this.
“i don’t want you tired,” he muttered. his lips hovered by your throat. “i want you sated. quiet. shaking.”
“i want to feel loved,” you whispered.
and that shattered him in a way no cursed energy never could. he didn’t speak again. he just kissed you slowly. it felt wrong on his mouth, too soft and tender, but you sighed into it, fingers curling in his hair, and that made it right.
so he kept going. kept touching you like he meant it. like he wasn’t trying to own you, but understand you. his hands didn’t bruise this time. they cradled and traced every inch of skin like a map he hadn’t studied well enough. you were warm and too sweet.
he didn’t deserve this, but fuck, he needed it.
when he slid inside you, it wasn’t rough or frantic. it was slow, like he was giving you a chance to run.
you didn’t and pulled him closer. “i hate fighting with you.”
“i hate making you cry,” he rasped.
your nails dug into his back. “then stop doing it.”
“i’m trying.” it sounded like a lie, but this time it wasn’t.
he kissed you deeper and harder then, his mouth was the only way he knew how to speak. i’m sorry. i’m here. i’m yours.
you moaned softly, thighs wrapping around his waist. “you feel different.”
“i’m not fucking you,” he said, eyes locked on yours. “i’m loving you.”
your breath caught and he almost looked away. but then your hand touched his cheek and he stayed right there.
he kept thrusting, slow and deep, watching every tiny reaction play across your face like a prayer he hadn’t learned how to say. your lips trembled and your hips rose.
and he realized that this was the most intimate he’d ever been. not the sex. the look. the watching. the being watched.
you could see it all now; the hunger, the guilt. the desperate, bitter hope that maybe this could be enough. maybe you’d still want him, even after seeing how broken he was inside.
“i’m not good at this,” he whispered.
“i know,” you breathed.
“but i want you.”
“i know.”
“and i don’t want anyone else touching you. ever.”
you smiled softly. “that part, you’re very good at.”
he huffed and pressed his forehead against yours. you wrapped your arms around him like you finally believed it that he was trying. that he cared. and for once, he didn’t need to say anything more.
he held you and moved inside you, because he belonged there.
Could I get a yandere meruem x reader on her period? Tyy <3
Prized Possession(NSFW)
Yandere!Meruem x Fem!Reader
!!REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!
A/N: I wasn’t sure exactly what you wanted so I did a lil nsfw fic, but if you want something SFW/headcanons/etc then please feel free to send another request with specification ^^
warnings: fingering, pussy eating, dubcon, public sex, period sex, breeding, mentions of pregnancy, Pitou treats you like their queen and pampers you, Meruem is HORNY, obsessive and possessive behavior
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It had been two days since Meruem had tightened the metaphorical collar around your neck, keeping you stationed on his lap at all times of the day. His nose stayed buried in your neck, and despite your cries to at least do it behind close doors, his fingers stayed buried in your pussy, lightly pumping into you.
“Shh, shh, my princess. This is for your own good, so don’t complain.”
He curled his fingers in your cunt, pressing down on your abdomen and humming lightly. “Soon… I can smell it.”
Meruem had never been the type to keep you too far out of his reach, but lately his version of love had been absolutely smothering. It wasn’t always revolved around sex, sometimes he would force you into the little nest of blankets and pillows he built for you, or hold you so tight you’d have to remind him of his strength while gasping for air.
He couldn’t stop purring as he ran his hand over your abdomen, continuing to say how “close it was”. You didn’t even want to know what he was talking about, but by the way you started to feel kind of icky and tired, you were beginning to understand.
And you were terrified.
Now, you liked Meruem. He wasn’t as cruel as others made him out to be, and he sure did have quite the soft spot for you, but he still was an inhuman monster that ate humans. And because of his inhumanity, his knowledge of the human body was limited, besides what he read from medical text books and the own way his semi-human instincts reacted to the changes in your hormones.
And that’s how you found yourself being awoken in the middle of the night to Meruem lapping at your cunt, a dull ache in your abdomen.
“Ugh… Meruem…”
He glanced up, his hands on your thighs. “My princess… did I disturb your sleep?”
Although his words sounded sweet, there was a hint of mischief in his eyes. If he wanted you to stay asleep, he could have made sure you did, but instead he decided to gently push at your abdomen as he continued to gorge on your pussy.
It was then you noticed the red on his mouth, and fit a fleeting second you feared the pain you were experiencing was due to him LITERALLY eating your pussy.
But no, it wasn’t anything like that. With another soft push on your abdomen, you watched as blood dribbled into his mouth.
“I knew it was close… how I’ve waited for this time of the month…”
You whined in embarrassment and pleasure, gripping the sheets as you felt his tongue push into your sensitive pussy. “P-please… too much…”
He didn’t stop, and you knew better than to push him away or complain too much. Meruem would never hurt you in anyway, but you knew that no amount of pushing or complaining would make him stop. It would just make him purr and push harder, just enough to put you on the edge of pain and pleasure. A vague discomfort, but not enough to hurt.
So instead of pushing or whining, you whimpered softly, gently stroking his face. He quite enjoyed that, his eyes narrowing in contentment. “Such a good girl… there you go, almost there…”
Meruem took great pride in his ability to make you cum within minutes of being between your legs. He was a natural from the beginning. Of course he was, he was king.
He stayed there, between your legs for what seemed like hours, each orgasm helping to relive the ache in your abdomen. Once he was thoroughly satisfied, he moved up to your face, rutting his hips against yours.
At this point he looked almost feral, his eyes peering down at you as his thick cock rested on your belly. He rubbed it against you, growling as he lowered his blood stained face to yours.
“Kiss me.”
It was only a for a second, but your hesitation caused him to growl lowly. “I won’t repeat myself.”
He gripped your chin, squeezing just enough to make you uncomfortable. You whimpered softly as you leaned forward and pressed your lips against his.
As soon as Meruem felt the touch of your lips, he relaxed. It wasn’t long before you felt his cock prodding at your pussy, and his tongue prodding at your lip.
You really didn’t want to taste your own blood, but you also didn’t want to be scolded, so you obediently opened your lips, just as his cock sank into your bloody cunt.
He allowed you to whine, for your nails to scratch his back as he began to fuck into you. Meruem had the power to stop you whenever he wanted, but he didn’t. How kind he was to you, how lenient he was with his little pet.
“Shh… be a good pet and take it.”
Meruem preferred to be as close to you as possible when fucking you. His instincts told him to keep you pinned down and still, to breed you when he started smelling the sweet pheromones of your menstrual cycle.
Nights like this were exhausting. He needed you so badly, his brain filled with the need to breed you until your belly was heavy with his seed. It didn’t help that you were crying out and moaning beneath him in this sensitive state of yours.
How he loved the sounds you made, the cries and whimpers, the moans and whines. You really were his little princess, the perfect pet to play with in his spare time.
But… at the same time, you were much more than that. When the royal guard suggested he start spreading his seed among the many human women at his disposal, he became angry and almost… guilty. He didn’t want to impregnate some woman he didn’t know, he wanted you and you alone.
Perhaps he did love you. He had read many books, some being novels on romance. Meruem didn’t really understand it at first, but after meeting you he just couldn’t get you out of his head. It was an unhealthy obsession, you were supposed to be a way to waste away his spare time, but now he was beyond attached.
As he filled your womb once again with his cum, he placed a hand over your belly. “My little mate… yes, that’s what you are, my mate…”
He lightly traced circles in your belly with his finger, his eyes soft. The urge to mark you and cover you in his scent was overwhelming. He felt so possessive over you, even though you only interacted with his Royal Guards, he still felt the need to make sure everyone knew you were his.
As your blood soaked into the soft sheets of your shared bed, he finally pulled out, humming softly. “Pitou.”
They were by his side in seconds, not reacting at all to the scene in front of them. Meruem pulled you into his lap, petting you as if you were his exhausted puppy, rather than the woman he deemed his mate.
“Bathe her, dress her, then feed her.”
Without hesitation, they nodded. “Yes, King Meruem.”
You whined softly as Pitou carried you in their arms. One hand was on the soft curve of your ass, and the other was in your hair, soothing you softly. You were their queen, someone Meruem ordered they worship just as much as they worshipped him, so they did just that.
“My queen, I see you’ve come into heat.”
Pitou set you by the bathtub, filling it up with warm water as they used a rag to wipe away the blood from your thighs. After all the access blood was gone, they placed you in the warm water. “Heat..? I guess… that’s what you would call it.”
You relaxed as Pitou washed your body, their hands grazing your soft breasts and thighs. “It seems King Meruem has successfully bred you. It’s an honor to bear the King’s young.”
You watched as Pitou caressed your belly, right over your womb. You weren’t sure how they would know you were pregnant, surely there was no way you were already. “The King’s semen is potent, you’ll be with child soon.”
Ah, that explained it. They just assumed since you and Meruem had sex, that there was no way you weren’t pregnant. You’d laid with Meruem several times before, but this time… he was really adamant about filling you up.
Pitou rinsed you before scooping you up as if you were just a kitten. They dried you off, grabbing a pair of panties for you with the pad already applied. It was a bit humiliating how much the royal guards babies you, but you couldn’t do much about it. Once you were dressed, Pitou purred softly, butting their head against your hand.
Meruem didn’t allow for much affection, but you did. You smelled so much like him, and as the queen you were the second best, and the only one other than Meruem that Pitou would be so docile for. “Mmph, my queen…”
You let them carry you back to your chambers, where Pouf and Youpi were waiting with a meal, prepared just for you. Meruem sat on your now freshly cleaned bed, reading a book. He looked up for only a second, giving you a knowing smile.
“Eat, you need your energy. You’re losing blood, so it’s iron rich.”
You sat down, Pitou laying their head in your lap as you ate. You were surprised at how lenient Meruem was with Pitou, but the ant just saw Pitou as nothing more than your pet, and his servant. The cat like ant purred and mewed softly as you petted their head. It was a bit strange, but it was the only physical contact you got outside of Meruem. The other two royal guards didn’t seem to like you as much, more like they put up with your presence to keep their king happy.
After you finished your meal, Meruem set his book down. “Come.”
Pitou set up immediately so you could follow Meruem’s orders. You stood, wobbling slightly, causing Pitou to shoot up and accompany you. They acted like a mama cat, grooming your hair as they guided you to Meruem’s side.
Pitou set you down, the kneeled next to Meruem as he pulled you into his lap. “Sleep, you need rest. Do not think this was the only breeding session, this process will happen until your heat is over.”
You knew that Meruem was a lot of things, but he certainly wasn’t a liar, and he didn’t over exaggerate. If he said you needed rest, you would.
You slid your hair on his chest, closing your eyes as he ran his hand over your hair.
◟contents. — unprotected p in v ⋆ manipulation ⋆ baby trapping ⋆ drabble + character study ⋆ MDNI 18+ ◟note. — this is just diabolical… i love it
it’s not an accident that he came inside you. not really. but nam-gyu plays it off like one.
he fucks you so good and deep, slow at first, then rough, hands gripping your hips. pushing you flat against the mattress, pressing into you until there’s nowhere left to go (not that there’s anywhere else you want to be)
“f-fuck, you feel so good,”
he groans, pushing in deep, grinding his hips against yours. his voice is wrecked, and it only makes you cling to him harder, letting out a choked moan when he buries his face in your neck. his thrusts turn sloppy, erratic, and something in the back of your mind prickles with warning, but before you can say anything, his grip locks around your waist.
“fuck, baby, i—” it’s barely a warning before he shoves himself in to the hilt, grinding deep, staying there. warmth floods your core, and your mind snaps out of the haze of pleasure.
“w-wait, you—” you gasp, trying to push at his shoulders, to wiggle away, but he just presses in closer, a satisfied hum vibrating in his chest.
“should’ve told me sooner,” lips dragging languidly along the curve of your jaw, voice dipping into a syrupy tone. “look at that,” he purrs, tilting his head in mock wonder. “so messy, baby.” two fingers dip between your legs, pressing against the mess he’s made inside you, pushing it deeper.
you shudder. nam-gyu chuckles.
he doesn’t give you a chance to argue. instead, he rolls you onto your back, dragging his fingers through the slick heat between your thighs, bringing them to his lips. his tongue flicks out, tasting, and he hums, grinning down at you.
“i’ll be more careful next time.”
────౨ৎ────
your hands are shaking.
two lines. clear as day.
you feel sick.
the bathroom door creaks open behind you, and you don’t need to turn to know who it is.
“what’s wrong?” nam-gyu’s voice is groggy, thick with sleep. you swallow hard, still staring at the test on the counter. your tongue feels heavy in your mouth, throat too tight to speak.
he steps closer, and when he follows your gaze, everything in him goes still.
silence.
then— “oh.”
your stomach twists as you finally look up at him. his eyes flicker between you and the test, his expression unreadable. then, slowly, he exhales a breathy laugh, rubbing a hand over his jaw.
“well,” he says, a lopsided grin gracing his lips. “guess we’re really doing this, huh?” his hands land on your waist. “hey,” he murmurs, tilting his head.
“you okay?”
you blink up at him, searching for something—regret, guilt, anything—but there’s nothing there. just that easy, casual smile, his thumbs stroking slow circles against your hips.
“we?” your voice comes out hoarse.
“yeah, we.”
he leans in, brushing his lips against your forehead.
“you think i’d just leave you to deal with this alone?” he murmurs, his voice gentle. like the thought itself is ridiculous. he pulls back to meet your eyes again.
“everything’s gonna be fine.”
it’s not that nam-gyu doesn’t care about your feelings. it’s that he cares about keeping you more.
love has never felt secure to him. it’s always been something fragile, conditional—something that can be revoked at any time, without warning. and you… you are the closest thing to permanence he’s ever had. the idea of waking up one day and realising you don’t love him anymore, that you’ve had enough of him, that you’re leaving—he can’t stomach it.
having a child out of wedlock carries social stigma, so if you were to get pregnant, the pressure to stay together and marry would be immense. and that’s what makes the idea so appealing to him.
so he lies. tells you he’s wearing protection when he isn’t. convinces himself it’s not really deception, just a guarantee. or maybe he “forgets” to pull out, murmuring a hoarse apology against your sweat-damp skin, pressing soft kisses along your jaw as if that’ll make up for it. “you just feel too good,” he mumbles thickly, as if that’s reason enough.
if he didn’t care about your feelings, he wouldn’t bother with the reassurances, but caring too much—caring selfishly—means he convinces himself this is what’s best. that this will make you stay. that if you’re tied to him in a way that’s permanent, unbreakable, then maybe he’ll never have to know what it’s like to lose you.
and if you panic, if you start to put the pieces together, he stays calm—too calm, in fact, as if he doesn’t see what the big deal is. wasn’t this bound to happen eventually?
“why are you freaking out? it’s not like i’m some asshole who’s gonna run off.”
“you act like i don’t want this, too.”
it’s not desperation, not exactly. it’s self-preservation, the only way he knows how to make sure you stay. because a baby means permanence. it means responsibility, pressure, expectations—all things that would make leaving harder. and sure, maybe that’s fucked-up and selfish.
but love makes people do crazy things. and nam-gyu? he’s crazy about you.
Friendly Competition | Triangle!Guard x GN!Reader |
Gif by @delirivmtr3mens
Summary: You two seem to hold a competition when it comes on who takes more players down.
Warnings: Canon violence - Guns - Flirting - Organ Traffic - Reader gets called Sweetheart - MDNI -
Notes: Yes he is a bastard but I like him so if you dont then dont read. And I dont remember his number.
Player 104 The robotic voice in your left ear said. You checked throw the scope of your riffle and took the shot on his knee so he would not die fast.
Player 206 The voice said once more, this time you went to aim for her side when another shoot won yours and passed throw her liver.
"Really 033" You asked pulling your shirt to talk throw the small speaker. A male laught was your response, this was the only chance you got to know his real voice and not the robotic one the masks gave all of you.
"You need to be faster 013" He responded and you could hear the smile on his face as you repositioned yourself waiting for the next order.
Player 055 You took the shot it pierced the guy's heart. You cursed yourself mentally since it would mean less organs.
Player 405 You saw the male go down with a clean shot to the head
"You are welcome Sweetheart" His voice came once again and you had to bite down your lip to prevent the smile
"About what? You just disposed a good body" You responded looking once again as the doll sang
"And you shot one down throw the heart. Its that an indirect for me?" He joked to you as he positioned himself once more
"Im counting 14 on my side. Whats yours?" You asked to stop him from going further not that you were not liking it
A whistle rang throw your ear pircing it. "I believe we are on a tie Sweetheart. Maybe we should look for a new way on breaking this"
You could hear a small "why dont they fuck and be done" by other Guard. You felt pity for the rest. This has been going since you joined the games as a Guard.
Player 127 You were already on him shooting down at his feet then at his knee. You saw another one fall not to far away.
"15 and 15 Sweetheart, I know you can do better" His taunting yet alluring voice said
"Are going to let me win this round?" You asked back checking one again and shooting off when the voice ordered
"Temping. But I believe we should set a reward for the one who wins" Another one down "What are you doing after this" He taunted knowing fully well you two needed to follow protocol.
"Oh, I will be going out to dance tonight" You followed his joke hitting another player "Do you think you could follow my moves?"
"Sweetheart for you? I would follow anything" He flirted "I should be telling you that I dance hard, and I get that a lot"
Player 400 He was double shot by you and him and you had to bite down a laught from the side comments of the others.
The next song would be the last one and the reminded players behind the lines would be shot down. This was the last chance to break the tie. And you knew most Guards would let you and him have your own fun. You two were the best snipers of the Guards after all, all of them did bet on who would take down the most players. Even if they had to tolerate the flirting.
The Doll stopped and you wasted no time in taking down the rest of the players. You die not see their numbers or faces. For a lont time now you had detached yourself from it.
"Guards, collect your weapons and retire to your rooms. This time Guard 013 its the Guard with more kills followed by 033"
"Better luck next time 033" You called as you tucked down your gun and prepared to leave.
"Such a cold heart. Does this mean I dont get to dance with you tonight?" He asked, him pulling away his own weapon. His mind imagining yourself under the uniform and under him.
"You can knock yourself and figure it out" You responded "A warning, im a difficult dancer" You finally said pulling your mask back on.
"Oh, I would not have you any other way Sweetheart. Cant wait"
The doors opened and all of you stepped out. You could see his figure a few guards in front of you. He was all rigid and ready to follow the Square Guard orders.
It was small, very subtle but when you passed by him as he left his riffle you felt his gloved hand on you. A shiver down your spine by the idea of him coming to your room tonight.
It was luck the Front Man or other Guards seemed not to care at all. Hell maybe you two would be recorder and then the recording would be sold on the dark web.
Just as the door was closing behind you it was pushed open, guard 033 was there uniform still on. The door was pushed closed as he removed his mask and black cloth, his eyes full with desire were the first thing you saw and the messy hair.
He was on you in an instant pulling your own mask off and the cloth kissing your lips like he was starved from them. He caressed your sides urging you to get out from the uniform as he bite down on your lower lip. A suprised gasp left your mouth and he wasted no time in pushing his tongue inside. It explored yours, you got a small groan from him as you pulled his hair.
Still kissing he pushed you onto the bed, getting between your legs to let you feel just how much he wanted you. He licked your cheeck and bite down on the little flesh the uniform let see.
Moaning you removed your gloves to feel his hair now on your skin taking a mental note on how soft it was. When you feel his teeth on you, you pulled at his hair again harder getting now a full moan out of him.
"No marks" You warned, as you started to get out from the uniform.
"Sweetheart just time...I will let you call the shoots" His voice was raw with need as he kissed right where your pulse was. "Next time, and trust me there will be a next one. I will be the one who decides"
Warnings: dead dove do not eat, kidnapping, mentions of sexual abuse and other traumatic events in the past, numbness, helplessness, violence, threatening, mentions of blood, mentions of murder/gore/death, body issues, trauma talk, stockholm syndrome, forced relationship, unhealthy relationship, depression, manipulation and low self-esteem, mentions of sexual activities, loss of identity, threatening, penetration, breeding kink, degradation kink, cockwarming, edging, overstimulation, sleepy sex (both consent!), not beta-read, if I've missed any warnings or tags please tell me! mdni 18+!
"Your girl" - The Salesman x Reader Masterlist
Life was good.
Uncharacteristically so even.
There was still a tiny part of you that was tense around him and that was for various reasons. One of them being, that you never really knew when his evil persona would take over. So far you could tell, albeit roughly, but there were always moments, when he would simply snap and there was nothing you could do about it. Was that a problem? Probably, but not to you, anyways. Why? Because life was good.
The little trip to the balcony hadn’t been a one-time thing. In fact, it happened more and more regular. Not only to get naughty, because he was a freak, who liked the thought of possibly getting caught – but also because, as he said, you’ve been such a good girl for me all this time. And I told you, sweet girl, I don’t want to keep you locked away. I just needed to make sure you’re mine.
That you were. Quite obviously.
That one time when you told him you wanted to leave, it had been exactly that. One time. The reasons for that outburst were in the past so far. There were still moments when you feared punishment and rightfully so. But to your great relief, you were both learning.
You were learning not to expect a painful blow, whenever you went out of your way to speak your mind (which wasn’t quite as often as you wished, but you were getting there). Slow and steady.
And he? He was learning, too. He was learning to leave you be and control the wild beast that lived inside his mind and soul. The darkness that surrounded him became lighter every day or so it felt to you. Of course he wouldn’t let you downright insult him, without at least some punishment in sight. But he was working on himself and his behavior. He didn’t hurt you without a reason. He didn’t hurt severely. And on some lucky days, he didn’t hurt you at all.
Slow and steady.
What was probably the greatest part of it all, it felt like a relationship. A real one. Two people who shared a life together, doing all kinds of things, sharing an intimate relation, but most importantly, you talked.
You talked a lot.
And now it wasn’t only through games and the fear of punishment. It wasn’t even only you who was forced to talk. No, he talked as well. The important things were still a big issue, obviously. He didn’t have a name, an identity or a past, when it came to you. But you had the great, undying hope that one day he would trust you. Trust you enough to let you know who he was and where he came from, what made him who he was and what was truly important to him.
Sometimes you’d get those tiny, little flickers that shone through his façade, his tight mask. The moments when the look in his eyes became faraway and distant, when his voice became softer and the tension in his body gave way to something quiet. Maybe one day that would be the version of him that you would get. Entirely and without question. Without the filter to rule out his emotions for him.
Until then, though, you would make do with what you had. And what did you have?
His favorite movie? The good, the bad and the ugly. What a question. Actually, anything with Clint Eastwood in it. Haven’t you seen the man?
His favorite musician? Ennio Morricone. Did you watch that scene in Inglourious Basterds, right before the Bear Jew comes out of the cave? That scene – and that composition – it’s reason enough to watch the movie. Aside from all the Nazis getting burned, of course.
His favorite food? Tteokbokki. But they have to be spicy enough to make your tongue fall off.
You smirked to yourself as you stood by the stove, slowly stirring the rice cakes in a black pan. He was talking movies all the time and that was a language you understood well.
In a minute you needed to add the spices and that disturbingly hot, red sauce. It was something you had cooked before, back in England. You had been scrolling aimlessly through one of your countless apps, which you normally used so you wouldn’t have to think and there you found some recipe that had been viral for a while. A Korean recipe with rice cakes in a sauce, topped with sesame and green onions. It had been quite the ordeal to find rice cakes back where you lived, but when you finally did and you tasted the recipe you had so carefully and lovingly prepared, you found it was worth it. It had actually been the first step into the life you were now living.
South-Korea, you had thought. Why not?
You poured the sauce in and wanted to try it, but decided against it in the end. You’d spend the next hour trying to soothe the pain in your mouth with bread and milk. With a soft sigh, you turned off the stove and served the food on two plates. You set the table with the gentle precision of a lovely homemaker. Even the napkins were folded prettily, giving the whole scene the last touch it needed to come off as…thoughtful.
Of course you never mentioned to him that you knew the dish. He had mostly likely thought it was just another Korean word he threw around and you’d forget immediately. And you had made no attempts to make him believe differently. So, when you began to cook this, it was with the intention to surprise him. A short glance at the clock showed you that it was almost ten in the evening, so he would most likely be home soon.
Home. What an odd thought.
You sighed again and washed your hands. A lecture you had to learn only once before in your life – spicy food didn’t quite match well with eyes.
You glanced around the kitchen once more, half-expecting him to be late. After he luckily gave you the books back, you asked yourself if you should go and read something, until he arrived, but that question answered itself, the moment you heard the door creak open. A nervous smile grew on your face and you nibbled on your lower lip. For some reason, a part of you was still afraid. A tiny bit, at least. It was like you expected him to punish you for good things. For being affectionate or caring.
But the moment you saw his head perk through the door, you knew you wouldn’t get punished tonight. Well, at least not, until you gave him a reason to…or asked him to.
His face lit up in surprised delight, his brows furrowed in a mixture of disbelief and confusion.
“Hello?” He murmured as he stepped closer and set the briefcase down on a chair. Your smile grew somewhat and you folded your hands behind your back.
“Hey.” You took a step closer and tilted your head to the side. “I made dinner.”
“I can see that.” He glanced at the lovely decorated kitchen table. You had put in quite some effort, looking through all the drawers until you found a tablecloth, lit some candles and then there was his favorite food. He looked from the table to you and smiled.
“And what exactly did I do to deserve this?” He raised a brow in suspicion. You returned the smile.
“I just felt like it.”
“So, you know Tteokbokki!”
You laughed quietly. “We’ll see about that. You should try it first.”
He hummed softly and stepped closer. You expected him to head for the sink and wash his hands, which he most definitely would, but before that, he stepped close to you, so close that you felt the warmth radiating off him and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. Then your cheek and then your lips.
You closed eyes and leaned into the kiss, immediately aching for more. But a second later he pulled his head back and smiled again.
“I just know I’m going to love it. Thank you.”
You felt yourself blush and so you averted your gaze. He finished up getting ready and then pulled out your chair for you, like the gentleman he was, or well, he could be.
The both of you settled down and you kept a keen eye on him to check his reaction, the second he brought the fork to his lips. You half-expected him to recoil in disgust, but instead, his brows furrowed and he hummed in approval.
“This is perfect.”
You scoffed in amusement. “Stop bullshitting me.”
“No, I mean it. It’s perfectly spicy, just the way I like it. And it’s homemade. Do you know how much that me-“ He stopped himself and cleared his throat. The filter. “I really love it. Thank you.” He squeezed your hand under the table.
You smiled again and leaned back in your chair, taking a moment to simply watch him eat.
When he saw you were staring at him, he cocked a brow. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“Now it’s you bullshitting me, huh?”
That made you laugh. God, how beautiful this was. Just simple, plain banter. Back and forth, like normal couples shared. You loved it.
You loved him.
When you laughed, a cocky grin grew on his face. “Mhm. I still have it in me, don’t I?”
You smirked. “Oh, shut up. For an old man.”
His grin widened and he picked up the fork, bringing it to your lips. Wordlessly, you parted them and took the food in your mouth. It was painful, of course, but you tried to keep a strong façade. And failed.
He laughed and held out a glass with milk to you, of which you took a big, grateful sip.
“Why are you making it, if you can’t even eat it?”
“You like it.”
He hummed softly. “And you remembered.”
“It’s not that hard. I collect the few things I know about you like postage stamps.”
He snorted. “Oh, so now we collect stamps, do we?”
You grinned cheekily and gently nudged his shoulder. “Eat your abnormal spicy food and shush.”
He shot you another smirk and eyed you up and down for a moment. It left you feeling oddly comfortable.
“You’re beautiful.” He mumbled before he took another bite. Your brows shot up and you titled your head to the side. You were better now, when it came to this. Compliments and accepting them. After all, he had no reason to lie to you whatsoever, now, did he?
“Thank you. But why are you saying that?” Not as good as you thought, but better.
He brows furrowed. “And why wouldn’t I?”
You shrugged and he shot you a long, suspicious look. “I’m not taking it back.”
That made you laugh again. He sounded like petulant child and you loved him even more when he was like this. Just…easy.
Easy to love.
“Why are you laughing at me?” He joined your laughter.
You smirked and took another sip of your milk. “If you can’t tell, it’s already too late.”
Days passed, weeks even, and life was still good. Very much so.
Every now and then you would ask yourself, when will things take a dark turn again? You couldn’t help yourself. These first few weeks were stuck in your mind like a nightmare you hardly remembered and yet felt in every inch of your body. Even when you didn’t...
Your body remembered.
He had that in him. That dark, that evil. It would undoubtedly come out again at some point. That’s why you always tried to remind yourself, not to dive too deep into what you called your perfect world. At some point, you’d surely be in pain again.
Though, you had to admit, you were hardly in pain nowadays. Your mysterious man was a gentle man, when he wanted to be and that happened more and more these days. Whenever he came home, he’d make a habit of kissing you and asking you about your day. His smile came out, more and more often. On very rare occasions, when you got really lucky, you even heard him laugh. And not the mock-kind of laugh he’d have so well-rehearsed in his repertoire of masks, he had for the world to see, but the real kind. A sound so unbridled and genuine, so warm and endearing, it made something inside of you ache. Why was it so rare?
Of course he still hurt you sometimes, but that was more of a consented kind of thing. In most cases.
Whenever he decided it was time for you to cockwarm him, for example. God, you hated, when he did. Because you loved it.
You loved the feeling of having him inside you on any occasion, really. Sometimes he’d be reading the newspaper and have you on his lap, his free hand on your hip to hold you perfectly still. You always asked yourself, how on earth did he manage to read like that, without even cocking an eye brow, while you were nearly fainting in agony, because all you wanted was for him to move?
On other nights, and you were ashamed to admit how much you enjoyed it, you’d even sleep like that. You’d lay either facing away or facing him, but often clenched around him. He’d nuzzle his face in your hair and after a while he’d usually drift off like that, his breathing slowly soothing down to a soft sound. Sometimes, when he’d wake up in the middle of the night, you felt him move and grind his hips against yours, giving you the friction you so desperately desired. Sometimes it happened quickly, sometimes it took a few hours and sometimes it didn’t happen at all. But when it did and when it did take hours to get to that point, you’d normally be half-asleep and yet desperate. The second you felt him move inside you, it was as though a switch got flipped. You became needy and…
Wicked.
For you, it didn’t matter how many times he fucked you. How many times he made you cum. When you felt him like that, you needed him. Ardently.
But in most cases you managed to be good for him, just like he asked you to. Good and perfectly still. When you did, you got rewarded. Which, in most cases, consisted of him going down on you and making you feel things with his tongue that made your toes curl and your breath stutter. He made you cum so good that you nearly forgot your own name.
At times, you did forget it. But odd enough, you didn’t really miss it. Names weren’t important. Not with him.
And then there were those other times. The times, when you got too needy, too desperate and, despite your better will, you found yourself moving against him, desperate for any kind of friction. That was when you got punished still.
Sometimes with a firm slap to get you back on track. That wasn’t enough to make you forget about your need for him though. Normally, you’d just fall back into the same pattern, given enough time. And after a while, he got more creative with his punishments. When he realized that pain was something that you were rather immune to, compared to other things, you were fucked.
Quite literally.
When you moved and disobeyed his orders not to…
He fucked you. Which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Not at all, actually.
That was until…
You came. You came every time with him, which was something you had highly doubted, before you started this thing between you. But to your surprise, you were more than relaxed with him. And so you came.
But he didn’t stop there. No, it was a punishment after all, right?
So, he kept fucking into you, like a feral animal. Even after you came and the pleasure quickly shifted into overstimulation. You got so sensitive, it was close to painful. But he kept going.
And then, oh God, you’d come again. Of course you did. He was good at what he was doing. You came again, shuddering and gasping.
And he still wouldn’t stop.
Even when your body arched into the air and you tried to get away from him, all desperate, he’d continue fucking you, until your mind was a mess and all you could do was stutter and whimper, cry even.
It was one of his favorite ways to punish you.
When he didn’t keep you on edge or withdrew your release for the time being, he made you cum until you begged him to stop, sobbing and whimpering.
Oh, the crying turned him on, you could tell. Because it normally ended with him filling you up to the brim. And then he’d go back to sleep, wouldn’t he? With his length still buried deep inside to keep warm.
Let’s just hope you learned your lesson now, darling. I’d hate to punish you again.
He had done exactly that the night before and so you found yourself lying on the sofa, feeling sore and exhausted. When he came home that night, you were still passed out on the couch, too sleepy to even open your eyes. He regarded your broken frame with a warm, yet subtle smile and set his briefcase down. He took a few slow steps closer and watched over you for a long moment, before he reached for the nearby blanket and pulled it up to your shoulders. You weren’t really fast asleep, just somewhere in-between, so you felt his knuckles gently caress your cheek. You mumbled something in response and you heard the way he smiled, before he vanished to the bathroom and you heard the way the water got turned on.
After a while you slowly blinked your eyes open and yawned. When you saw the blanket, a smile crept onto your face and you hugged the material tightly to your body. Slowly and carefully, you sat up and rubbed your eyes, before you decided to try and cook something for a change. You got better and better at it, considering how little you knew about the Korean cuisine. Yet you had to admit, it seemed healthier than anything you had ever eaten back home.
When you couldn’t think of anything, you decided to be safe and went for Bibimbap. It was a mixture of near everything and also the fastest thing you could think of. But before you even started, you went back to your room to grab a claw clip for your hair. You swiftly did it up and made your way through the hallway, when you saw that the door to his bedroom stood open. You saw his white shirt splayed out on the bed and you just knew it smelled like him. You bit your lip as you slowly tiptoed inside and picked the shirt up, only to bury your face in the material and inhale softly.
If this wasn’t home, what would ever be?
You hummed softly to yourself, before you swiftly slid off your caramel colored skirt and your black tank top, to put his button down shirt on instead. The material hugged your body like a gentle hug and you smiled to yourself as you rolled the sleeves up in the way he would. Of course the shirt looked fairly huge on you. You took a long glance at the big mirror and smirked. It looked like a dress on you, albeit a short one. You twirled around like a ballerina and took in the way your thighs were barely covered by the material. That gave you a wicked idea.
Of course your body was begging you to leave it be, especially after last night, but the devil inside your mind forced you to keep the shirt on and make your way back to the kitchen.
In the meantime, he had finished his shower and now he sat on the couch, with the newspaper in his hand. He wore a pair of grey sweatpants (the damned bastard) and a black shirt. His hair was still damp and hung loosely into his face. He looked delicious.
When he heard you approach, he looked up, ready to greet you, when he hesitated. His gaze roamed up and down your body in a way that made you bite back a smirk.
“Hello, darling.” He murmured, without ever looking up at your face.
“Why, hello.” You purred cheerfully and approached him with slow, tiptoed steps. His gaze wandered up your legs and torso, until he finally met your gaze.
“You look…”
“I thought it suits me better than you.” You teased.
His lips curved up into a slow smile. “I can’t disagree.” He took your hand, ready to pull you onto his lap. But after last night, you felt in dire need to take some action and control.
Not, that you didn’t somehow enjoy it. But still.
You briefly squeezed his hand, before you pulled yours away. You gave him a quick peck on the lips, then took a step back.
“I’ll go cook.”
His brows shot up. “I can-“
“No.”
You hid your smirk, until you had your back facing him. With quick, measured steps, you disappeared into the kitchen, all the while pretending not to hear his frustrated groan.
The next few minutes went by rather quickly. You did a great job cooking up some ingredients and even an egg, Sunny Side Up. You quickly set the table and eventually left some rice on the stove, to slowly simmer. With a soft, exaggerated sigh you made your way back to the living room.
“It’s almost done.” You murmured as you slowly approached him. When you looked at him, you deliberately missed his face and his expression became more and more dour.
“Good. I was thinking-“
“I nearly finished my book.” You interrupted him in a sweet voice, as you sat down on his lap, causing him to freeze for a moment. It only took him a second to relax, though he seemed to have forgotten that you had interrupted him and what he even intended to say in the first place.
“That’s…good.” He murmured.
“Just two more pages. I’ll finish it quickly, before dinner, okay?”
He cocked a brow and shrugged slowly. “Sure. Suit yourself.”
His shirt rode up your thighs and revealed more and more of your skin to his gaze. He didn’t even try to be secretive about it, he was straight-up ogling you. All the while you buried your nose in your book, without reading a single word. You had to save up all your energy as not to smile.
His fingertips brushed over the skin of your thigh and you did your best to keep your expression neutral. And he, he was just…
“Are you-“
“Oh God, I didn’t see that twist coming.” You closed the book and sighed. Then you shot him an innocent look and smiled. “That was a really good book.”
You leaned back against his chest and kept up your innocent façade, all the while the look in his eyes equaled that of a bear with his fish.
“You really-“
“I’d better go and get myself another one. I’m sure the rice needs a few more minutes.”
His hand ended up in the middle of the air, while you practically jumped off of his lap. He let out a soft grunt of frustration, while you slowly swayed your way back to the bookshelf. Of course your hips swayed along and obviously his gaze did the same.
You held a finger against your lips, pretending to think, while you slowly went about the rows and rows of books. And then, what a coincidence, a book in the last row caught your attention. You smiled and bent down, pretending to read.
At the same time, his patience snapped. When his shirt rode up further, exposing just a hint of your rear to him, he let out a low growl.
“That’s enough.” He hissed. You smirked, before you slowly turned and replaced the smirk with innocent surprise.
“What? What’s enough?”
“Oh, stop this.” He slammed the newspaper down on the coffee table and stood up in a swift movement. “Stop acting all innocent. You’ve been parading around here, half-naked and ready to…”
“To what?” You murmured and tilted your head to the side in feigned curiosity. He growled again and ran a hand over his chin. Only then did you see the obvious tent in his grey sweatpants. It cost you half your life not to look down there and trust your peripheral view.
“Don’t play dumb.” He murmured. “Get over here. Now.”
You licked your lips. “But the rice-“
“Now!”
That made you laugh and there went your innocent act out of the window.
“You minx! You’re doing this on purpose!”
You chuckled. “Well…”
The look on his face was near rabid. Only the foam was missing.
“I’ll forgive you this once, if you’ll be a good girl for me and get your ass over here.”
You smirked and took a step back, circling the sofa. “And if I don’t?
He hissed in response. “You don’t want to test me today.”
And for some inexplicable reason, right then and there, you weren’t scared. That tiny part of your brain that had continued to keep up the fear, albeit briefly and barely, was completely silent. And you knew he wasn’t going to hurt you, no matter what you did.
“Make me then.”
His eyes widened and he tilted his chin up. “Oh, that’s a mistake.”
You grinned. “Oh, that’s a mistake.” You mocked his voice.
With a movement so quick that it almost made you wince, he jumped over the back of the couch and stood before you, eyeing you like a predator. You let out a soft shriek and turned on your heel, running and laughing, without looking over your shoulder.
It took him only a second to put his hand on your shoulder, but it took you only a second to shrug him off and circle the coffee table.
“That all you got, old man?”
You could have sworn you saw his lip twitch, but that would have been too easy. He tried hard to keep his expression serious.
“Grew a backbone, did you?”
You raised a brow and smirked. “Oh, boo-hoo. Did I hurt you, oppa?” You hinted a mocking curtsy.
“Oh, you just wait!” He rushed to catch you from one side, but you quickly ran the other way. When he tried the other way, you went the other way, yet again. He gave a frustrated growl.
“What now, hm?” You smirked. “Giving up already?”
He gave you a long, wild look. For a moment you almost thought he was indeed giving up, but then he rushed forward and kicked the table out of the way. It rolled over and crashed against the wall loudly. Your eyes widened in surprise and you took a step back, but before you knew it, your back was already pressed against the wall and you had to tilt your head back to stare up at him.
“You caught me.” You whispered.
He clenched his jaw and reached out a hand. You were sure. You were still sure, that you were safe.
And then…
His hand slowly tangled in your hair and gently grasped the back of your neck. He leaned down so that your lips nearly met.
“I caught you.” He whispered back, before he captured your lips in a bruising kiss.
And you let the rice burn.
A few days later, you couldn’t even tell which day it was, because every day was but a collection of memories you kept replaying in your head, he was off to work.
And to no one’s great surprise, you missed him.
Every waking moment without him was empty. The emptiness was so intense, it left you nearly suffocating. All the while, all you could do was wait. Wait and eat. Wait and sleep. Wait and read.
Sometimes, you wrote. You remembered that one time you told him about your greatest dream.
To become an author one day. You didn’t even care, if anyone knew your real name, you just wanted to touch people with your words. Like the Bronte-sisters.
Ellis Bell, huh? And who would you be?
Hana, maybe. The thought made you equally as sad as it filled you with hope.
But that was about all you did. And after hours and hours, the day neared its end. Eventually it was far past eleven, so you were sure he would be late tonight. Of course you were concerned. As you always were. You had no idea what his job was, but you could tell it was dangerous.
The man in his clean suit and a briefcase full of secrets.
When it got closer to midnight and he still wasn’t back, you decided to distract yourself, by getting yourself ready. You changed into a beautiful, white negligee with a neckline made of pretty, see-through lace. You loved it. The silk made you feel like you were the most beautiful girl on earth. And you were sure, once he saw you in it, he would totally destroy it. Chew it off or tear it down, whatever worked faster.
You did your hair down (it was slowly growing back and you barely thought back to the dreadful day that he cut it) and took a last glance at your appearance in the mirror. You smiled at yourself, something you rarely did, and eventually made your way back to his bedroom to surprise him. On his bed, wearing nothing but the negligee and a pair of…
Where were the handcuffs? You frowned as you glanced around and didn’t immediately find them. You bent down to look under the bed, but still no cuffs in sight. Your frown deepened and you gave another quick onceover, before you decided that they most likely were in the wardrobe.
You opened it and knelt down, finding the knife and several guns in the process. The small shudder brought you back to reality and you exhaled softly, before you sat back and looked at the countless weapons. Had he ever killed someone with them? Most likely.
But for a strange, inexplicable reason, you didn’t really care. Not really. Because it wasn’t real. Not then, not there, not in that moment. What was real, was him and his…
Desires.
You opened your mouth and closed it, before your fingers slowly closed around a small handgun. You swallowed thickly and carefully held it up, only to realize it was far heavier than you always assumed. The material felt cold and wrong in your hand.
Your mind involuntarily wandered back to the day he pressed one of them against your temple or…his. You closed your eyes. The thought of him…
Him…
With a shuddery gasp, the gun slipped through your fingers and landed on the carpet.
There was no thought more painful than that one. You couldn’t lose him. Not ever.
You loved him. And you loved him far too much.
Enough, to be what he wanted.
Enough, to give in to his desires.
You took another deep breath and picked up the gun again, determined to take it back to bed with you. You wanted to surprise him, right?
All you had to do beforehand was to make sure that it wasn’t loaded.
A frown formed on your face, when you realized you didn’t even know how to do that. The thought of accidentally shooting yourself, while waiting for him to come home…It didn’t sound all too appealing, though it did sound like something that could happen to you.
You sighed and already gave up the thought of ever finding the cuffs, when you caught sight of something else instead. It was far in the back of the wardrobe and you were sure, for some reason, you weren’t supposed to see it.
Of course you weren’t supposed to touch his gun, either, but you felt he would forgive you, once he realized you were slowly submitting to his every desire.
Even if it meant him fucking you, while he held a gun to your head. In your mouth…Or, God help you, somewhere else.
You were twisted. You were sure you were. Because you felt it. You felt how the thought did things to you.
But for now you tried to push the thought aside and instead glanced back at the box.
Then again, what terrible thing could be inside there?
Someone’s teeth maybe?
Your soft smile disappeared the second you realized it was possible. You nearly recoiled in disgust. But then you realized, you had to know.
It couldn’t be teeth. It was too sick. Too deranged.
Too…him?
No. No, no, no.
As if in a trance, you picked up the light, wooden box and took off the lid.
No teeth inside. Only…
Fuck.
What was in there was so much worse than teeth.
Your forehead creased into a small frown, which grew further with every second.
And suddenly you felt nauseous.
No.
Oh, no.
You nearly dropped the box and backed away like you’d been struck, the moment you heard it.
“Goddamn it." He sighed impatiently and the door slowly closed behind him. "You weren’t supposed to see that.”
Hi! I really enjoy reading you writing, thank you for taking the time to write so much🩵 I was wondering if you could write namgyu fiancé/wife headcannons(I got inspired to ask after reading your Patrick Bateman hc’s lol.) Anyways sorry if this was worded weird in any way it’s my first time sending a request😭 love you writing🩵!
I NEED A GANGSTA TO LOVE ME BETTER THAN ALL THE OTHERS DO . . . husband! + fiancé! NAMGYU
warnings — toxic behaviour but we still love him jackie’s note — thx for the req ! i did my best trying to keep him in character
makes sure to charm your parents, but it’s not over-the-top. he’s not the type to be overly polite or sickeningly sweet—that would seem fake. instead, he plays it smart. respectful, well-mannered, but with that natural confidence that makes people believe in him. calls your father abeonim (아버님) and your mother eomeonim (어머님), bowing properly when he greets them.
tl;dr — maybe because his actor (roh jae-won) wears glasses irl, i imagine nam-gyu wearing glasses to look “well-read” and “sophisticated”. also he’ll cover up his tattoos with long sleeves.
if your parents are traditional, he knows exactly how to navigate that. he’s sharp—he understands the nuances of korean etiquette and leans into them when necessary. he makes sure to pour drinks properly, holds his glass with both hands when your father pours for him, eats with careful manners. if your parents are strict, he presents himself as someone stable, capable, a good match. if they’re more laid-back, he relaxes slightly, adjusting his tone to match the atmosphere.
subtly reminds you that he’s on his best behavior for you. if you tease him about how polite he’s being, he just smiles, leaning in to murmur, what, you think i’d go through all this trouble if i didn’t love you? a little smirk, a slight squeeze of your thigh under the table. a reminder that you are the reason he’s being a good boy—because normally, he wouldn’t even bother.
if your mother fusses over him, he plays along. when she offers him more food, he doesn’t refuse, thanking her with a polite smile. if she comments on how skinny he is, how he should eat more, he chuckles, glancing at you. your daughter already takes good care of me, eomeonim.
if your father is hard to impress, he takes it as a challenge. he’s patient, methodical—never too eager. he doesn’t try to prove himself all at once. instead, he subtly weaves his way into your father’s good graces. agreeing at the right moments, asking the right questions, offering carefully-worded insights that make him seem thoughtful, intelligent. and if he finally earns even a hint of approval? he glances at you, his smirk barely concealed. told you i’d win him over.
carefully watches how your parents treat you. if they’re critical, make offhand comments about you, if they push certain expectations—he picks up on it fast. and later, he uses it. you always do what they want, don’t you? a soft, almost mocking chuckle, his fingers tracing lazy circles on your wrist. no wonder you’re always so easy to push around.
he’s prepared for any potential criticism. if your parents are skeptical of him, nam-gyu doesn’t get defensive. instead, he meets them with calm responses—turning doubts into opportunities to prove himself. i understand why you’d be concerned, abeonim. i’d feel the same if i were in your position. but i love your daughter. i wouldn’t be here otherwise.
if your family likes him too much, he gets really smug about it.
if your parents don’t approve of him, he doesn’t panic—he improvises/adapts/overcomes. he knows that pushing too hard will backfire, so he plays the long game. lets them see the good parts of him, lets them warm up to him over time. and in the meantime? he makes sure you’re still firmly in his grasp. it doesn’t matter what they think, he tells you. as long as you want me, that’s all that matters.
he’s the kind of fiancé who treats the engagement ring like a collar. it’s not just a symbol—it’s proof that you’re his. he likes seeing it on your finger, will get noticeably irritated if you take it off, even for something as innocent as washing dishes.
nam-gyu loves calling you his fiancée / wife. he says it all the time, almost tauntingly, because he knows it flusters you. where’s my wife? when he walks into a room. c’mere, dear fiancée when he wants something. it’s possessive in a way that makes it clear—you’re his. and when he really wants to make a point? my wife wouldn’t do that to me, right? an almost-smirk, a tilt of his head, watching you.
marrying him doesn’t make him any easier to deal with. if anything, it makes him worse, because now you’re his in a legal sense. you signed the papers, you made the vows—he sees it as something unbreakable and permanent. and the idea of you leaving? no. that’s not happening
has a hard time differentiating between love and control. nam-gyu doesn’t always realise when he’s being unreasonable, because to him, at least, getting engaged isn’t about keeping you under his thumb—it’s about making sure you don’t leave. you agreed to this. you’re his now. and that means something.
gets unreasonably affectionate when he knows you’re mad at him. you try to ignore him, but he keeps pressing into your space—an arm looping around your waist, his face buried in your neck, lips brushing your skin as he mumbles, you’re really gonna stay mad at your husband? it’s unfair how easily he wears you down.
thrives on the ‘newlywed’ effect. the first few months after your wedding, he plays into it hard. always using it as an excuse. i have to get home—i’m a married man now. or can you blame me? i just got married, of course i want to spend all my time with my wife. but even after the honeymoon phase passes, he still pulls that card when it suits him. especially when you try to push back against something he wants. so much for that ‘for better or worse’ vow, huh?
manipulates arguments into ‘tests of loyalty.’ you bring up a real issue? suddenly, it’s why are you turning against me? you’re upset with something he did? so much for ‘in sickness and in health.’ he doesn’t really believe in marriage vows, but he sure as hell knows how to use them.
finds ways to make sure you need him. maybe it’s handling the finances, maybe it’s subtly discouraging you from relying on anyone else. but little by little, he makes sure you don’t feel comfortable making decisions without him. why are you asking them? your husband’s right here. always with that slight edge to his voice, like it bothers him that you’d go to someone else first.
he likes things done his way but knows when to pick his battles. he lets you win the small ones—the paint colour of the walls, what takeout place you order from—but when it comes to bigger things, things that matter, he has a way of steering things back in his favour.
gets into the habit of taking things that belong to you. nothing major, just little things. a hair tie, a chapstick etc.
gets unreasonably possessive in public. his arm around your shoulders, his hand on your thigh, fingers laced with yours even when it’s inconvenient. he doesn’t like when people look at you too long, and if he catches someone staring, he won’t hesitate to make it known that you’re taken. a glare, a hand tightening around your waist. and later, when you’re alone? do you like it? when people look at you like that? a smirk, a tilt of his head, his fingers trailing up your spine. do you like making me jealous?
doesn’t really want kids, but if you do, he’ll act like he’s doing you a favour. if it’ll make you happy, fine. but he never fully steps into the role of a father. he sees them as extensions of you, not his. he’ll help when he feels like it, but the responsibility? that’s on your. and if they ever come before him? he makes sure you know it.
nam-gyu never lets you forget that you chose him. you said yes, remember? whenever you question things, whenever you feel trapped, he always reminds you—you agreed to this. you wanted this. and sometimes, when he’s kissing down your neck, when he’s got you needy and pliant under him, his voice drops to a soft murmur—no one else will love you like i do, baby. and the terrifying part is, you know he’s right.
warnings: sex, drugs, unprotected sex, sub nam gyu, manipulation, sex under the influence of drugs, alcohol, toxic relationship, toxic nam gyu. +18
Nam Gyu tossed and turned in bed a thousand times, with a thousand thoughts in his head, your image was the only thing he could see clearly that morning. You were wrapped in the blankets like a bundle, your hair spread on the pillow, and your hands in front of your face. You were finally at peace, looking happy only when you were sleeping peacefully. He breathed hard, turning toward your sleeping figure, grabbed your helpless hand only to join it with his own. How long would that game last? Out and stay. Out and stay. For a thousand times, a thousand encounters, yet to him you still remained an enigma.
You promised yourself that you would be good this time, that the distance from him would be manageable, but it was always like that, it happened a lot. You were always too stoned, drunk and needy to stop. Only in the end you had managed to feel far too much affection for him. He, on the other hand, sought you out only when it was most convenient for him. No one could hurt you more than him. No one could heal you, you said, but the love you felt for him was alive. It burned. And it hurt. All his broken promises just to have you one more night in his bed, what were you after all that time?
Friends? No, friends don't touch each other like that, don't confuse your thoughts, don't kiss until your breath is completely gone. You are not friends. But to him you are like nothing. One in billions. But he wanted you, no woman he saw at the Pentagon gave him the same effect. You were not friends. You were nothing. He was just very good at breaking promises, looking for you when he needed you, or when he promised you at night that he would come back to you, but he didn't come back at all.
He wanted you. But not the way you wanted him. You coveted him as a lover, he used you to vent when everything was too complicated to digest. That morning you looked radiant to him, he had never seen you so serene, in truth, a warm smile carved your cheeks into pretty dimples, your cheeks flushed and your hair messed up. You had not spoken; you had simply looked at him, shifting your eyes to your entwined hands. It all seemed so intimate, so simple, that you almost missed your pulse.
Waking up like that, every morning, was all you aspired to. His black eyes seemed to read your soul too easily, all your weaknesses, all your love you felt for him. He stroked your hair gently, moving an unruly lock away from your face. You remembered little of the other night, everything so blurry and unfocused, Nam Gyu's breath on your neck as you sat on his lap, his arm holding you tightly, possessively, as he made you feel his erection against your bottom in plain sight thanks to the short skirt.
Remember how he had grabbed you by the hips as he put a blue pill in his mouth, remember how he had kissed you by sliding it into your mouth, a hundred times with the kiss deepening and the pill melting under your tongues. He had touched you as always, but now there was the drug consuming you, your body split in half. You could remember nothing but his appearance shrouded in a cloud of smoke.
"I want you."
Then the emptiness. Just him, his room, his hair clinging to your neck and your skin burning. You were lying on the bed, as if paralyzed, as he crushed his head against the pillow rolling the joint. You were twisted in on yourself, his boxers on and his loose shirt traveling straight. He had run his tongue over the edge of the rod a couple of times, then passed it to you. His lips soft and plump. Irresistible. No matter how hard you tried, the feel of his lips on your neck was hard to erase.
You were both drugged, locked in those four walls, your eyes foggy from that joint you had just smoked.
"What's the matter, bunny, can't you do it?"
"Think for yourself," you had whispered before straddling him. Everything was wonderful. Too much so. You still had his cologne on you as you trembled with immense pleasure under him and felt a range of otherworldly sensations inside your body. He kept up the pace so that you came for the thousandth time that same evening. You trembled around him as you moaned into his mouth.
You were not lucid. But it happened a lot. He was so good at using you.
His brown eyes were exhausted, hiding a proud smile, as if he was happy to give himself to you. He didn't want to waste time. But he liked hurting you so much.
You had cried that night because of him.
"Oh, fuck," was your moan as your intimacies collided, and you continued to tighten around him. Aware of your closeness, of his excessive fatigue and your desire to have a little more fun. He had touched the end of your neck several times as you played with his hair and sniffed it like a drug addict. You had whispered his name against his ear, looking at him just below his long, thick lashes.
"You're driving me crazy, you fucking bunny," his voice grew lower and lower, but he didn't want to scare you. Your legs trembled so overwhelmingly that you leaned them against his hips to draw him more to your body. He had paused briefly, playing with the strands of your hair as if to soothe you.
You were so close. So close. It was heaven.
When the storm of your orgasm began to fade, only a gracious smile was born on your face. Finally he was there, again, to hurt you.
You used to remember. But you still remembered too little. For after this he had fallen onto your body and then rolled onto his side. He looked so beautiful when he was asleep, so at peace, you had barely sighed before resting your lips on his in his drowsiness.
"What are you doing?" he gasped into the gentle kiss you had granted him.
"I'm kissing you"
"Why do you persist in loving me?" maybe it was the pill, or maybe he really was the main problem. He turned his back to you too quickly, you were still shaken, your thighs shaking and the smile that had now faded from your face.
You don't want to remember. Now. Nam Gyu got out of bed without making a sound, leaving you there, wrapped in the sheets soaked in his scent, your skin still warm from the marks he had left on you. The mattress sagged slightly as he moved away, and for a moment you had felt the emptiness at your side, as if it had only been an illusion, a blurry dream amid alcohol, smoke, and stifled moans.
You reached out a hand into the darkness, seeking the warmth of his body. Finding only the cold of rumpled sheets. Your heart clenched in your chest. He had left you once again. And you, once again, had believed he could be different.
You had stood staring at the ceiling, trying to ignore the burning inside you. Each time it was the same thing. He would take you, consume you, and then pull away, as if it had been just another meaningless night. But when he used you like that, he made you feel loved. Cursedly loved.
You had pulled yourself up with difficulty, your legs still soft, your head turning slightly. His shirt slid wide over your bare shoulders, the fabric impregnated with his scent. You ran a hand through your shaggy hair, trying to tidy your thoughts, but it was no use. The night blurred in your mind like a vortex of pleasure and regret.
You could hear him, he was in the kitchen, the sound of the gas on, the clink of a spoon against the cup. The scent of coffee wafted through the air, familiar and painful. You had dragged yourself out of the room, barefoot on the cold floor, then leaned against the doorframe.
He was there, his hair still tousled, his chest bare, his boxers pulled down slightly on his hips. He was pouring his coffee with his usual calmness, his shoulders tense, his gaze not even dignifying you with a glance. As if you had never existed. As if he had not spent the night inside you, whispering against your skin things that now seemed to have evaporated into the air.
You wet your dry lips before speaking.
"Are you leaving without saying anything?" Your voice was scratchy, hoarse, still marked by the night.
Nam Gyu had not looked up, bringing the cup to his lips, blowing softly. "What good would it do to say anything?"
Your stomach clenched. Always like this. Always fucking like this. You had moved closer, crossing your arms over your chest. "So what? Are you again the usual asshole who fucks and then pretends nothing happened?"
He finally looked at you. His eyes were cold, inscrutable. "I never promised you anything"
You knew. But hearing him say it like that still broke you.
"That's strange, because last night it seemed like you were doing something else entirely"
He laughed softly, bitterly. "Last night we were high. It's different"
You had paused, for your own sake, feeling your hands clench into fists along your sides. "No, it's not different, Nam Gyu. Not for me"
He stiffened, his fingers drumming against the cup. "Then whose fault is it?"
You were out of breath, for a second, no longer knowing how to breathe. "Mine?"
He shrugged, taking another sip of coffee. "You're still here, aren't you?"
That sentence had been the straw. You had reached out, grabbing his arm to force him to really look at you. "And why are you always looking for me? Why can't you let me go!"
The cup slammed against the piano with a dull sound. His eyes were dark, his jaw clenched, his hair messed up, "I don't want to let you go. But I don't want what you want either"
Your hands were shaking. "Then what the fuck do you want from me, Nam Gyu?"
Silence.
A heavy silence, laden with everything you never said.
Then he flinched, grabbing a pack of cigarettes and lit one. He took a long drag, exhaled the smoke without looking at you.
"I don't know"
You felt you lacked air, your throat tightened in a vice. He was always like that. Always hovering between yes and no, between desire and rejection. You couldn't take it anymore. "You're a coward," you had breathed out, your voice trembling with anger and pain.
He laughed, a sound devoid of joy. "Maybe"
You had shifted out of the way, grabbing the still-warm cup and throwing it against the wall. The sound of shattering pottery filled the air. Nam Gyu did not move, did not even flinch.
"Tell me you don't want me anymore and I'll leave," you were challenging him, your eyes glazed over, your breath broken. He turned toward you, cigarette smoke enveloping his face, his gaze steady. "I can't"
You felt yourself breaking down.
It was a vicious cycle. An endless game.
You had dropped into the chair, your head in your hands. "Then you're an even worse bastard than I thought"
Nam Gyu put out his cigarette in the sink, then ran a hand through his hair. "I know, bunny"
You bit your lip hard, trying to hold back the frustration that exploded in your chest like a hurricane. He was there, standing in front of you, with that air of someone who won't let anything get to him, someone who is in control of everything, even you. And that was driving you crazy.
"If you know that, why do you keep doing this to me?" your voice cracked, but you didn't want to cry. Not in front of him.
Nam Gyu huffed, ran a hand through his shaggy hair, and shook his head. "I'm not doing anything to you"
"You're not doing anything to me?!" you had exploded, and with you your anger, your hands moving instinctively against his bare chest, pushing him hard. "You want me. You seek me out. You destroy me. And then you pretend not to. If that's not doing something to me, then tell me what the fuck it is!"
He barely staggered, but did not move. He looked down at you, his lips pressed into a thin line, his dark eyes burning with emotions he did not want to admit.
"I can't give you what you want." Another stab. You felt yourself sinking.
"Then let me go," you whispered, more to yourself than to him. "If you can't give me what I want, let me go"
Nam Gyu had remained silent, his breathing barely heavier. He wasn't going to do that. You knew. He never would.
You stared at him, anger mixing with the pain, the nights spent longing for him, the mornings like that when you were left with emptiness between the sheets and a broken heart. And he was still fucking there, without an answer, without an ounce of shame.
"Tell me you don't care about me. Look me in the eye and tell me"
He didn't. He never did.
On the contrary, he had taken a step toward you, his chest brushing against yours, his warmth enveloping you like a flame too close. "You don't understand," he whispered, his voice low, scratchy, charged with something he didn't want to say out loud.
You burst out laughing, a bitter, desperate laugh. "I don't understand?! I love you, Nam Gyu! l-"
Not let you finish.
His hands tightened around your face and his mouth crashed against yours violently. A brutal, hungry kiss, filled with anger and frustration. It was not sweet, it was not gentle. It was a confrontation, a desperate need.
You clung to his shoulders, nails sinking into warm skin as he pushed you back, not breaking the kiss, not giving you time to think. He grabbed you by the hips with the strength of someone who did not want to let you go, and you hated him for it. You hated the way his body stuck to yours, the way his tongue explored your mouth as if it were his own.
You crashed against the couch as he pushed himself down unceremoniously, pulling your body to sit astride him.
"Nam Gyu-" kiss, "Please." kiss.
"That's not enough, baby. Let me hear your voice," he lowered his lips to the level of your sensitive ear; he was a very good actor, becoming dominant just to manipulate you and get whatever he wanted. He had lightly bitten your ear after saying this, as you tried to hide your beautiful face even more, ending up in the crook of his neck.
"I need you," an almost inaudible whisper was heard in the room, muffled further by the proximity of your lips on his neck. He felt your panties getting wetter by the minute.
"Where?" He continued with that torture, he wanted to rip the words out of your mouth, he had no intention of stopping, common sense had overwhelmed reason. You had to talk, with him, express your desires.
"Inside me" you had put even more force on his grip, moving your face to look at his lips voraciously, but he had no intention of kissing you now. He wanted to do it gently, the one he so lacked. At his words one of your hands slid to his boxers.
Your bodies intertwined in the darkness of the room, skin against skin, heat against heat, with no more room for modesty or control. It was a perverse game, a visceral need that renewed itself every time your hands found each other, your lips colliding in kisses too greedy to be sweet.
Your clothes were already strewn on the floor, as forgotten as the promises you had never made to each other. His fingers traced paths over your skin, as if he wanted to memorize every inch of you, as your breath broke against his neck. His muscles tensed under your hands, his chest rising and falling heavily as desire grew between you, insatiable, inevitable.
He held you against him, making you shudder as his throbbing member brushed against your opening, teasing you with slow, studied movements, as if he wanted to hear you beg. And you, damn it, were already there, ready to give in, ready to let him destroy you once more.
"May I?" you had asked, looking deeply into his eyes, a mixture similar to bitter coffee. You were looking for a signal from him. He felt his belly explode from the sensation, his head thrown back as you touched his light abs to his navel. He penetrated you very slowly, forced to suppress a moan, biting his lower lip fiercely. You both gasped as he entered you completely.
"Bunny" grabbed your hips, throwing your head between the pillows as you began to jump on his cock like a mad mare, your breasts in the wind and his footprints marking the flesh of your damn soft hips.
You had begun to move back and forth very slowly and quietly, not really picking up a rhythm.
Moving your hips, you had picked up a rhythm that was not too fast but sustained, making Nam Gyu moan even louder, "shhh" you had whispered in his ear, that hiss broken in turn by a few moans. You were no better off. Yours, at that point, sounded more like cries coming out of your mouth, moans combined with whimpers. The friction between your two bodies was driving him crazy; he was as if drugged by the sensation. You had rested your head against his chest, moaning pathetically, while your hips gave no hint of decay.
His words kept reaching you like a distant echo, "You are so good," he begged your voice in a way so deep that it only made him moan more, and for a moment he stopped breathing on his own, "You need to ride me more often"
In response you had breathed hard, wrapping your lips lower toward his Adam's apple. Your legs rubbed against his, making little jumps to increase your shared pleasure.
"You don't want to stop now, little girl, do you?" He had said hoarsely in your ear. His cock moved a little to the left, hitting a particular spot, a scream ripped your chest in two. "How beautiful you are," your forehead on his shoulder, he played with your breast, taking it with his large hand.
"Oh, fuck," you had screamed, digging your nails into his shoulders as you flexed on his body as if you were dying.
"What, you want me to stop?"
"Don't! Don't. Please. Don't ever stop," you had closed more against him, pinning your legs against his stomach.
Fuck.
You were almost at your limit. You had gasped as you felt his cock react inside you, as he took you by the hips so he could get out.
"Can you finish inside me?" you had gasped with a puppy face, grabbing his hands to move them from your hips and rest them on your breasts.
"Are you sure?" he had asked, but you had kissed him again, with overwhelming eagerness, grabbing his dark locks.
"Please, just this once"
"Just this once, bunny"
Your muscles stiffened and his cock twitched repeatedly, then a gentle kiss on your neck as he released himself completely inside you. He had taken your face only to kiss you one more time; you were shaken, confused. The silence that followed was almost unbearable. Both of you were too tired to talk, but not tired enough not to feel the emptiness between you. Your bodies were still warm, but the contact no longer felt the same, as if everything that had brought you together had vanished along with the tension that had dissipated. Every breath seemed heavy.
He was not looking at you. He had moved slowly, as if the slightest movement was an unbearable effort, and had taken the cigarette from the pack on the table beside the bed. The smoke rose, dancing in the air like a fog that separated them, like a barrier between his world and yours. You watched him in silence as the room seemed to grow smaller and smaller, your thoughts more confused. The adrenaline you had been feeling was slowly fading, giving way to a feeling of emptiness. The feeling that had always haunted you.
All that passion, that irrepressible desire, in the end had never been anything but an illusion. Maybe that was what hurt you. The fact that, each time, you felt involved, overwhelmed, but always for a reason you could not understand. What about Nam Gyu? He was the same as always. Nothing more. Yet, each time, you thought he would be different. But it had never been.
He had said nothing as he watched you arrange your clothes. He merely looked at you, but not with the intensity of before. The one that made you feel like you were the most important thing, the most desired. Now there was only distance.
"Tell me this is the last time," you had said, your voice low, broken by a restlessness you could no longer hide.
"We can't stop," he had replied simply, his voice flat, devoid of emotion.
Warnings: 18+ (mature content such as voyeurism, rough sex, impact play, degradation kink, overstimulation)
A/N: I've had this idea in my head for a while and I decided to write it🫦 enjoy sluts🫶🏽
'What a fucking prick.'
Those were your last thoughts after another meaningless fight you guys had over his overbearing jealousy before your mind went blank from how hard and fast he was fucking you at the moment.
Beams of sweat were all over his neck, back and shoulders – almost all over his skin – some of it even collecting around his dangling chain and dropping over your face and chest as he rammed his cock into you nonstop, your spongy walls already too wet and accommodated to his size which made it easier for him to slip in and out of your cunt.
"Fuckin' whore... you were made for me, huh?" Despite the mocking tone, his words come out a little a slurred – whether because of the drugs or not you would never know – but you were too fucked out to respond, his words not even reaching your ears as you were busy moaning his name only to be interrupted when you feel the cold metal of his rings on your cheek, making you look at him through lust filled eyes as gave you a few more slaps. "Did you hear what I said?" He doesn't give you a chance to respond before he slaps you again. "You're made for me, bitch... open your fucking eyes." You do as he says, opening your slightly teary eyes to look at him, noticing his gaze already on yours with a sly grin on his face as he watched your tits bouncing with each brutal movement he made.
The sounds of heavy breathing, grunts and groans, moans and skin slapping filled the air as his thrusts got messier as he got closer and he lowers his body a little, bracking his forearms around your head and burying his face on your sweaty neck, allowing him to go harder and deeper and you ignore the pain in your legs as you lock them tightly around his torso, his pelvic bone perfectly hitting you overstimulated clit, your moans getting even louder as you near the edge but before you even had the chance to cum, you feel the hot and milky substance fill you up as he paints your insides white once again, briefly glancing at his phone that he managed to subtly set up when he pretended to check the time at some point.
God knows how long he's been destroying your insides.
And God knows for how long his dear pal Thanos has been watching you from his own phone with a smirk as they were on a video call.
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
A/N: pls don't blame me... ever since that scene above in the gif I've been imagining this scenario... anyways can you believe i wrote this in ONE GO??? Like?? Hope you enjoyed tho🫶🏽
tags — kang dae-ho × female reader | second person point of view | sfw headcanons | fluff | a bit of angst | pre-game timeline
warnings — not proofread | english is not my first language! | use of lowercase intended | stealing | vandalism | blood | injuries
word count — 8 094 words
last updated — 28/01/2025
requested by @literallypinkie
MEETING
YOU worked the night shift at a local grocery store. everything was much cheaper there than in hypermarkets and supermarkets in the area. many broke students, single parents, or even older folks with crumbs instead of an actual retirement plan would shop here. it was affordable and consistent with their income.
DAE-HO was a regular. one of the only persons who did not fit the usual customer criteria. he did not seem young enough to be a student and did not appear to be a dad with what he bought (mostly ramen, some snacks, fruits and frozen fruits, frozen food, protein yoghurts, milk and energy drinks that could give anyone a heart attack).
HE was always very polite. forever a smile on his face and something nice to say about the day. after paying, dae-ho always had some words of encouragement to give you for the rest of your shift seeing how exhausted you seemed. he would then take a seat at one of the tables displaced outside for customers and eat one of his ramen playing a game on his phone or watching a series.
LITTLE by little, pure politeness turned into small conversations by the cash register. these small conversations turned into taking your breaks with him where you got to know each other a bit more profoundly. these hangouts eventually turned into dae-ho waiting by the tables until you clocked out of work to walk you home. he claimed it was not safe for you to be alone so late at night.
EVENTUALLY, he asked for your phone number after another night walking you home. the two of you stared intensively into each other's eyes, waiting for the other to say something or make a move. he let out a small chuckle and said he should probably get going as the last bus to his street would probably arrive soon. you nodded pressing your lips together as you opened the door of your apartment building waving him goodbye. as you entered and walked to the elevator you heard your name being called out and immediately turned around seeing dae-ho holding the door open his mouth slightly open, his breath caught in his throat.
"could i get your phone number— or your instagram if you have one? any is fine, really..." he blurted out quickly. "we could hang out outside of work, you know... that would be great." he finished relaxing his shoulders.
YOUR eyes widened at the sudden outburst and you stood in place for a few seconds before widely smiling and heading to the building entrance, your phone in hand. "yeah, sure. i'd love that, actually!" you answered cheerfully.
ONCE you exchanged contacts, you gave him a sudden hug and walked back to your elevator. dae-ho waited until you entered the elevator to let out a long breath he did not know he was holding. he put his hands in the pockets of his jacket and headed to the bus stop, stupidly grinning.
AS for you, once you got home, you dropped your bag on the floor and started to jump up and down excitedly.
THAT WAS WHEN A BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP BEGAN TO BLOSSOM
FRIENDSHIP
THE day right after you exchanged your contacts, dae-ho texted you a simple "hey ;)" when he was taking his breakfast. he feared you had only agreed the previous day to get him off your back as if you had not been talking for a month before he finally made a move.
DAE-HO was anxious the whole morning, checking his phone every thirty minutes to see if you had answered him. each time, nothing. not even left on read. delivered. at least, he was not blocked, he would reassure himself. he even convinced himself if you did not answer at all if would change his routine to find a new convenience store to shop at, not wanting to make you feel uncomfortable and appear like one of those creepy men his sisters had told him about whose actions he witnessed himself a couple of times.
SECONDS felt like minutes and minutes felt like hours as he waited for this specific notification. he had to put his phone away, screen facing the table otherwise he would not be able to concentrate on the task he was supposed to be doing. he was getting weird looks from his coworkers, more than the usual glances. he could not care less as when his phone rang he rushed to the device, unlocked it and read your message stretching a smile back to his features.
"hii~! sorry for the late answer, i woke up late and then had to go to the bank. how are you doing? hope to see you tonight! :)"
DAE-HO was conflicted on whether to answer back right away and perhaps look desperate or to refrain and risk making you feel like he previously did. especially since he had already opened the text message, meaning he would be leaving on 'read'. he believed it would be rather rude of him and chose to answer right away.
"no problem! don't be sorry, it's normal! you have a life lol. i was wondering if you were up to hang out this saturday afternoon before you go to work?"
SURPRISINGLY, your answer was quick to come. "i'm up for that! do you have something specific in mind? because i know this place where you can eat and play arcades. if you're thinking of something else, it's fine. i just want to spend some time with you, anyways." your text read, making his heart explode in his chest.
DAE-HO agreed to your idea. you planned when to meet up and you gave him the address. the two of you were so looking forward to that day that you would talk about which games you would want to try out the most, who would be better at what (already very competitive), what food you would like to try, and if there were any prize to win at that place. Overall, you were very enthusiastic.
SINCE THAT DAY, THE TWO OF YOU HAVE BEEN INSEPARABLE EVER SINCE
DAE-HO and you have created a secret handshake you did every time you had to part ways. it is rather complicated and involves the entire body. going from a simple high-five to crossing your arms together and going in circles to finish with a chest bump. despite, the long and tiresome handshake, you still hug each other afterwards before going to your own whereabouts.
DAE-HO knows girl talk. he has mastered it. he might be even better at it than you. he had lots of practice being the youngest of four sisters. because of that, he loves gossiping. the two of you have a gossip session once a week where you tell each other all the drama that happened either between your coworkers, customers at your place of work or even things you have heard from absolute strangers. the gossiping session cannot be on facetime. it has to be face-to-face with snacks, a hot drink, and a warm blanket. it usually takes place at your apartment since it is slightly bigger than his studio apartment.
"so, you remember my coworker dae-jung, the old guy who has been dating that young secretary, eun-yeong?" dae-ho asked as you grabbed a handful of m&m's and began to organise them by colour. you let out a short hum to affirm you did know these people. "it was already a crazy age gap but i found out something even crazier. he is already married!" the man revealed as your eyes widened.
"how long has he been married?" you wondered hurriedly. "i have no idea. but, it's not the only thing about this whole situation. his wife found out about the affair with my coworker, eun-yeong, who, by the way, did not know she was the other woman, and she made a huge scene in front of my work building." you stopped organising your snacks, dae-ho having your full attention on him as you almost did not breathe waiting for the end of his story. "dae-jung literally begged her to stop and eventually she told him she wanted a divorce." dae-ho revealed. you were not surprised by this woman's decision, you were glad he got what was coming for him.
"is that all?" you wondered finally eating one of the chocolate in your hand. "nope." dae-ho continued, a wide grin plastered on his face. "so, they got divorced and dae-jung still stayed in a relationship with eun-yeong, however, my company has a strict policy on cheating, i didn't even know it was a thing, and because it caused too much drama within the company and apparently it could have a negative impact on our reputation. i don't really care if I'm being honest, but obviously, my boss does." the man nodded taking a sip of his beverage before resuming his story. "they fired dae-jung." he said as you cheered a little bit causing him to chuckle.
WHAT he was about to tell you next was mind-blowing. "eun-yeong was pregnant, and yes i used past tense. do you want to know why? because she got an abortion without telling him. he was fuming! he began to harass her, and she filed a restraining order which he did not respect and was eventually arrested!"
"it's crazy!!" "yeah, i know it's crazy!!" you both yelled out.
YOU never tell each other something wild that occurred through text, opting for a teaser text message instead :
"oh my god dude, you'll never believe what just happened!! i can't wait to tell you this weekend!!!"
DAE-HO hates all of your exes. you could be in the wrong during a previous argument you are describing to your friend, he would still find all the excuses in the book and side with you. you could have burned down your ex's house and in his eyes you would still be justified.
"i don't care, that person forgot your birthday and made it seem like it was your fault. you had every right to throw that vase at them!" he justified an expression of distaste on his face.
DAE-HO is a k-pop girl group stan. his favourite bands are girl's generation, mamamoo and twice. the two of you went to one of twice concerts in seoul and he was chosen during the random dance section where a person from the audience is shown on the big screen. he danced to 'yes or yes' with the light stick in his hand and you dying of laughter on the right corner of the screen. thankfully, some people had recorded it.
WHEN you eat together, despite it being totally platonic, you share your food. when one of you would buy a bag of chips, both of your hands could be found in it. an ice-cream? going from one hand to the other's hand. an apple? dae-ho, would use his strength to split it into two equal parts. dae-ho loves to share anything, to be honest. surely because of his childhood. he was pushed to share everything from food to toys and rarely had anything new just for him. it was almost second nature for him to share his food with you.
DAE-HO is the type to hold the fork in front of your mouth and ask you to open it to feed you. at first, you were flustered by his actions as he insisted that you taste his meal, clueless to the implications beyond friendship. he would then open his mouth without a word and make a sound for you to also feed him some of your meal. as time went on, you were not flustered to do it anymore, going as far as eating from the same cutlery without a care in the world. however, people would think you were a couple and would tell you how cute you looked together. at first, you would correct them quickly, a blush creeping its way onto dae-ho's cheeks. eventually, you gave up and simply thanked the person for the compliment. also, it was not as unpleasant as the two of you tried to convince the other.
"why do they think we're a couple? it's so annoying." you complained, rolling your eyes, and taking a bite of your chocolate-covered fruit salad. dae-ho nodded in agreement, giggling.
"right, that would be so gross." he replied, passing a hand through his hair, and avoiding eye contact.
"yeah, it's not like that between us..." you lied, unaware of the sad glance dae-ho threw your way before going back to his churros.
HE taught you how to play gonggi and now every choice has to be made over a game of gonggi. what film you would be watching tonight? a game of gonggi. which take-out place you are going to order from? a round of gonggi. who would be the first one to take a shower? gonggi, gonggi, gonggi and gonggi again. at first, you were not the best at the game, getting frustrated all the time, wondering if you could swap for a game of 'paper, scissors, stone'. dae-ho was adamant it had to be gonggi. The outcome was still the same, resulting in nearly all decisions being in dae-ho's favour. however, as months passed by, you got better at it, almost as good as dae-ho and now he had real competition.
DESPITE not being in a romantic relationship and affirming your relationship is platonic with a capital 'p', you give dae-ho so many nicknames ranging from "handsome" to "sexy" which started as a joke when the two of you were walking around hi=ongdae and this group of young girls who were partying made their way towards and began to flirt with dae-ho. he used you as a shield stating you were his girlfriend and the girls took the hint and left.
"so, how about we go home, sexy?" you mimicked one of the girls' voice. "shut up." he retorted amused walking as far away from you as possible as you had to chase after him.
FIRST DATE
IT was a mess. nothing, and when i say nothing, i mean it, went according to plan. from asking you out to the actual date.
YOU had been friends for about seven months by now, and everything was perfect between the two of you. boundaries were respected, you had a lot of fun together, you were there for each other when you were not feeling well and you would tell each other literally everything (too much information does not exist in this friendship, in your case it should be called tell me immediately).
HIS feelings for you grew gradually but skyrocketed the night prior when he spent the night at your apartment. nothing out of the ordinary, a usual gossip session, you watching a film and then some videos on youtube, you ordered take-out and eventually ended up in your bed. for the first four months of your friendship, dae-ho had categorically refused to sleep in the same bed as you, claiming he did not want to make you uncomfortable. you had to drag him by the arm affirming you wanted him to sleep in the same otherwise it did not feel like an actual sleepover. he gave in when he felt how comfortable your mattress was in comparison to your couch.
IT was past midnight and the two of you were exhausted. you were on your phone, scrolling through tiktok and you were showing dae-ho silly memes to make him giggle while he was trying to fight sleep. you noticed his eyelids close and open suddenly, as his face relaxed and tensed up quickly to give himself some adrenaline to stay awake.
"you know, you can go to sleep. you don't have to stay awake for me. if it's for the memes, i can just send them to you." you joked as you put your phone down on your stomach. dae-ho was already lying down on his side, all of his hair up in a ponytail and looked up at you. he did not try to argue as his speech was beginning to be incoherent due to fatigue. dae-ho pulled the blanket over his shoulders and made himself more comfortable. barely a few minutes later, soft snores could be heard from the young man.
SLEEP caught up to you ultimately and you lay down next to dae-ho who was already deep in slumber. you faced your back towards him and tugged on the blanket to get your fair share of warmth. when you were finally comfortable enough you unexpectedly felt a strong arm sneak around your waist and a body clung to your back. your breath was caught in your throat. dae-ho and you were not reticent to display affection to one another, but cuddling in bed was new. you did not want to wake up him since he was exhausted but you knew that pushing his arm away would do it. you were lacking a strategic plan when dae-ho's grip on you tightened. you felt your cheeks heat up, you and an oven could be twins at this point. his face was buried deep in the back of your neck. you could feel his soft breathing giving you goosebumps. ultimately, you gave up overthinking and fell asleep in this position.
OBVIOUSLY, you were woken up the next day by a startled dae-ho who jumped away from your sleeping frame and was profusely apologising. you dismissed his concerns with a sloppy wave of the hand as you were drowsy and told him it was alright. after all the two of you were that close, it would have happened one way or another. yet, he apologised one last time as he got up from the bed, stormed out of the bedroom and you went back to lie down face first on your pillow.
DAE-HO headed to the kitchen wondering if he ruined your friendship (that man overthinks everything). he decided he would make up for his mistake and prepare breakfast for you. you ended up waking up, sitting on the edge of your bed for a minute before staring blankly at the wall before you motivated yourself and got up, put on a random sweater and left the room as the smell of warm food filled your nostrils. you reached your destination and came face-to-face with an endearing sight. dae-ho in his baggy shorts and a green shirt in front of the stove making eggs. in the living room, the table was already set with two cups of tea, a few toast with jam and butter on the side, rice and kimchi. you took a few steps towards your friend, a grin creeping onto your face and greeted him. dae-ho turned around and greeted you back, surprised that you went for a friendly hug. he genuinely assumed your next interaction would be awkward, but nothing seemed to be bugging you.
"how did you sleep, handsome?" you asked leaning against the cheap counter. dae-ho cocked an eyebrow, glancing at you before setting back his gaze on the nearly burnt omelette. he quickly grabbed the frying pan handle and placed the omelette on top of the one he cooked when you were still enjoying the warmth of your now empty bed.
"i slept well... i think." he murmured awkwardly as you frowned at his response.
"you were snoring the whole night, i would have hoped you at least slept well." you laughed in an attempt to lighten up the mood, but the growing tension only rose as dae-ho remained quiet. you shifted your weight at the usual cheerful man's unexpected indifference. if only you knew how many thoughts were racing through his mind. dae-ho was overheating.
"i'm going to go to the living room... tell me if you need any help with that. thanks, by the way." you finished before leaving the kitchen, flopping onto your couch waiting for dae-ho and the eggs.
WHEN dae-ho finally came into the living room and began to place some eggs into your plate without saying a word, you pondered on how to bring up what happened. he would not do it himself, too embarrassed by the situation, and you could not stand the heavy silence in the room.
"so... are we gonna talk about the elephant in the room or pretend you didn't cuddle me to sleep?" you began shoving egg in your mouth nervously. dae-ho choked on his tea and coughed harshly feeling himself pass out. he was just being dramatic. you went to pat him on the back a bit to help him with his coughing and sat back down waiting for his reaction.
"i'm so sorry, i don't what came over me. it was an accident, i was sleeping after all. it won't happen again. that's why i told i should sleep on the couch!" he was frantic barely making eye contact as what stopped his rant was your laugh. he was quiet for a moment before ranting. "why are laughing at me? can't you see i'm panicking right now?!" he retorted pointing his chopsticks at you as you clutched your stomach, your lungs out of oxygen from laughing too much. you were even crying a little bit at dae-ho's helpless attitude.
"i already told you not to apologise, dae-ho." you managed to say after breathing a couple of times after his outburst and your cackling. "if anything... i kind of enjoyed it." you admitted, looking at the now flustered dae-ho. "did you?" you risked asking. it was the first since you woke up that dae-ho made eye contact, his mouth slightly ajar, thinking of an appropriate way to answer. eventually, he opted for honesty. "i did..." he responded timidly.
YOU beamed, his answer encouraging you to continue on this path. "i hadn't slept that well in a while. we should cuddle more often, don't you think?" you attempted some flirting to test the water. you did not comprehend which sort of confidence possessed you, but you were not about to complain. dae-ho's only answer was a quick hum, his mouth full of kimchi. the rest of the breakfast was quiet, however, not the same silence as before. this one was light, full of unanswered inquiries regarding the next trajectory of your friendship.
ONCE you finished breakfast, you lazily cleared the table as dae-ho insisted on cleaning the dishes. you reminded him that he prepared breakfast and that he should just go relax, you would take care of it (as much as you did not want to). as you heard the sound of water falling, you understood dae-ho was taking a shower. you had some time to contemplate your relationship with dae-ho. the two of you, as much as you loved to deny it, did act like a couple. apart from sleeping in the same bed, you would send each other a good morning and good night text every day without missing a beat, you would facetime each other every day, and he would still shop at the convenience store you worked at, though now, he would even pick you up after your shift late at night, even if he had nothing to buy. nothing casual about that. you had to find out.
AS you heard the water stop and the door open, your heartbeat quickened. you focused your attention on the utensil you were scrubbing harshly with a sponge. dae-ho made his way to the kitchen. his hair was damp and untied. he was wearing grey sweatpants and a green hoodie. he stayed by the doorframe as your movement became a little bit more clumsy, dropping a plate resulting in a loud clinking from the impact. wincing, you were almost done with the cleaning and dae-ho was still by the door. you raised your head and your gaze fell onto the man. it felt like time stopped. he was angelic. at least to you. to anyone else he was just a guy, but to you, he was so much more and it took that long to realise.
"have you ever thought of more? i mean... between us?" you gathered all the courage you had and asked, already bracing yourself for rejection. dae-ho's eyebrows rose as his mouth turned into an oval shape, no words coming out. you took it as a sign to continue. "we've known each other for a while now, and— unless i'm being delusional, wouldn't be surprising." you chuckled humorlessly as you looked away from your friend who slowly made his way towards you. "moving on, as i was saying, i think I've been kind of lying to myself. you see, i actually enjoy when people think we're a couple and i enjoy your company more than i should and— what i'm trying to say is, do you want to go out with me? as in a date."
DAE-HO was now only a step away from you, and you were still not looking at him. he sighed. "i was the one supposed to ask you out!" he complained groaning dissipating any remaining trace of tension. you were about to talk again when he went on a tirade. "i've been planning for three months now. i swear, you ruined everything. don't take it the wrong way! i had written this whole speech and listed all these reasons why we should date!" he explained looking up at the ceiling, his eyes firmly shut.
"you could have just asked." you chimed in and he looked at you dumbfounded.
"no way. i wasn't going to ask you out with some half-assed proposition. you deserve better than that." he said which melted your heart. he had been preparing this with his sisters, knowing they would be of great help to make something thoughtful and personal to you. "to be honest, the day i asked for your number was not only in a friendly way, but i am so glad you're my friend so i never tried to make a move. and here you beat me up to it."
YOU stared at him like he held the moon, smirking at his confession. "if you want, you can ask me now. without the whole speech, i guess, you can still be the one asking though?" you proposed and dae-ho calmed down. he cleared his throat, and let out a long sigh, as if the answer to his next question was not obvious.
"would you go on a date with me?" he sweetly asked and you threw your arm around his neck telling him you would love to as his arms made their way around you naturally.
IT MIGHT NOT HAVE BEEN PERFECT BUT YOU CHERISHED IT NONETHELESS
BETWEEN your confession and the actual date, dae-ho and you did not know how to ask around each other. if affection was not shy, now it seemed mandatory. you could not keep your hands off each other, whether it was a hand on a shoulder or interlocking your arms together walking down the street. as for the cuddling in bed (not only in bed, on your couch too), you two would deliberately do it this time, no more waking up startled, and you even initiated it, dae-ho happily complying.
DAE-HO organised everything. you tried to get him to let you organise together, but he claimed he should be the one spoiling you and as a gentleman, he would do so. he quickly realised most of your nights out were somehow dates. you would go to the cinema, constantly eat out, go to bars together, stay out late in parks, and have picnics. he was out of ideas and money, being in debt (which you were not aware of).
HE picked you up from work on a friday evening. you had asked your boss to change your schedule to go on this date instead of working your night shift. however, things ended up more complicated as when he arrived he found you still in your uniform jacked yet dressed nicer than usual (surely the outfit you had picked out for the date), sitting on the pavement, a scowl on your face. when you saw him, a beautiful bouquet of flowers in his hand and a confused look on his face, you sighed and got up grabbing the bouquet.
"i'm sorry. the person who was supposed to replace me had an emergency with her kid. something about fire. i don't know. we will have to postpone..." you explained upset. dae-ho was not about to let one obstacle ruin the evening, as disappointed as he was.
"it's okay. i will wait." he said walking towards the tables outside the store. you followed after him frowning. "you realise i still have three hours left until we close." you added for him to understand he would be certainly bored out of his mind if he stayed. "i know." he persisted as a matter of fact.
YOU nodded and told him you had to go back inside to rearrange an aisle and that he could call you if he needed anything. saying you were disappointed was an understatement, you were mad at your coworker but you also had to be tolerant she was a single mother with a low income. you were just a girl in her twenties without many responsibilities but paying rent and finding her place in life (not that easy either). you had been looking forward to that date with dae-ho the entire week. fantasizing about how romantic it would be, and maybe even kissing him at the end of the night. now, your expectations were crushed as you had to work. as you walked around the store, kicking an empty box that once contained multiple tubes of spicy mayonnaise, the bell by the door rang as dae-ho entered. he glanced around the artificially lit room until his eyes set on you.
"i was thinking, maybe we could have our date here." he proposed and you stared at him like he had grown a second head. he cleared his throat and continued to explain his train of thoughts. "i had reserved a table at this place we talked about a few months ago and since you're here we won't be able to be there. so, we should at least enjoy our night, here." he finished as one of the lights flickered. "as unpleasant as it can be..." he added jokingly.
YOU were not very on board with his idea, yet you caved as your boss was not here and you really wanted to spend the night with dae-ho.
DAE-HO spent the whole shift following you and moving things around the store. you even went fishing out a uniform jacket for him so he could fully immerse himself. you showed him how to use the cash register, and you told him about how some of the items were soon to expire but your boss changed the date and still put them up for sale. you showed him the tiny storehouse which was literally just huge piles of cardboard boxes sitting outside of the shop. you had him carry boxes in and out of the building and he was more than eager to show his strength, showing off and flexing his biceps like a bodybuilder. he would do anything to simply listen to the sound of your giggles. he never minded being perceived as silly by strangers (unlike the approval he profoundly craved from his father) if it meant having your genuine attention on him. during your break, you hid behind the cash register as there were not any customers, and honestly, if there were any, you would rather dismiss them than do your what you were hired for.
THE last hour of your shift was, to say the least, unprofessional. dae-ho and you would make ridiculous faces at the cameras and flip them off. you would run up and down the aisle, pushing a cart while he was sitting in it. you would eat snacks and throw the wrapper around. you just wished your boss, if he found out, would see the humour in it and not ban dae-ho or fire you (you abhorred the job but needed it desperately).
ONCE your shift concluded, you threw your hideous jacket as well as the one you lent dae-ho in your locker, not caring to lock it before running out of the store to join dae-ho. he grabbed your hand and the two of you headed to han river to appreciate the rest of your night. he walked you back to your apartment and you suggested he could spend the night there, as you did not want the date to end. both of you sat on the couch in a relaxing silence, staring at each other. dae-ho darting between your eyes and your lips. he slowly approached you, placed his large hand on your cheek.
"is this okay with you?" he murmured. you felt his hot breath on your lips. by way of a response, you captured his lips in a tender kiss your hands delicately holding his neck.
A CHANGE OF PLAN DOES NOT MEAN FAILURE FOR OUR LOVEBIRDS
RELATIONSHIP
DAE-HO was rather awkward at the beginning of your romantic relationship. unaware of how to act. he still felt like you were his best friend, which felt incredible. however, now he could unapologetically hold your hand when hanging out, kiss you whenever he desired, and hold you close to him during a film session. you had to reassure him that whatever he would do would make you the happiest woman in the world.
DAE-HO is the type of man to give you his sports shoes if your feet hurt. You would be wearing heels and the next moment shoes way too big for you. dae-ho would hold your heels in his hand. however, the sensation of the cold ground under his feet bothered him and would end up wearing your heels. noticing how amused you were by the sight, he would begin to strut and exaggeratedly pose like victoria's secret models (going as far as holding your handbag).
DAE-HO cannot spend one day without seeing you (which at first could have been interpreted as emotional dependence). he updates you on every little thing he does. obviously, he does not expect you to answer everything as, in less than an hour, you could receive around a hundred text messages (varying from funny videos to simple questions). after work or a date, one of you sleeps at the other's apartment. the first time you visited dae-ho's studio apartment, he was rather apprehensive. the lack of space with the sofa bed taking most of the space, the pile of clothes in the corner, his television placed on a white plastic table and the small broken fridge filled with unhealthy drinks and protein yoghurts (indeed most of his meals were taken at the grocery store you worked at).
DAE-HO'S wallpaper is a picture taken at a photo booth. in the top picture, he was kissing your cheek delicately. in the second one, you were kissing his face making sure your lipstick would leave a stain as a toothy smile tugged at his lips. in the third picture, you chose to pull a foolish face. in the last one, he grabbed you by the waist and kissed you, his hair concealing a part of his face as your eyes widened by the impulsive action.
DAE-HO'S way of telling you he loved you was a tad different. the two of you casually expressed the love you held for the other during your friendship. he wanted you to truly understand his feelings for you.
"i have completely lost myself to you. i am so in love with you." he blurted out one day. his confession had you spill some tears of happiness down your cheeks as you shared his sentiments.
DAE-HO will carry all the grocery bags or shopping bags on the way home. no matter how heavy they are. he does not want you to lift a finger. clearly, you do not mind as his biceps naturally flexes. he caught you countless times goggling at them. his ego is boosted. from time to time, he will taunt you, commenting that, with the way you stare him down, clothes are useless on him.
DAE-HO insists you give him a show every time you purchase new clothes. he will hype you up as you enter the living room. his compliments are over the top, yet, sincere. he will ask you to turn around to show him the back and pretend to fan himself from how stunning you look in this attire.
DAE-HO is the type of boyfriend who lets you customise him. he is not into fashion, therefore, any advice or opinion you gave him was taken into consideration. his style got so much better once you started dating. you think he should wear a certain piece of clothing? he will wear it the next day. you tell him a certain colour brings him out of his shell? now he has ten more clothes in this colour. you buy him a new hoodie? he will be seen parading with it for months. moreover, he loves matching outfits (as cringy as they can be) and jewellery. dae-ho would even go as far as suggesting getting a matching tattoo. you managed to dissuade him.
DAE-HO is the type of boyfriend who lets you do his makeup. he knows how joyful and excited you get. furthermore, his four older sisters would often use him as a walking mannequin (there are many pictures of him as early as the age of two all dressed up in oversized feminine clothes, messy makeup all over his chubby face as outside of the frame one of his sisters is still applying a heavy layer of blue eyeshadow).
DAE-HO also lets you braid his hair. it soothes him as he closes his eyes enjoying the sensation of the comb through his hair. scratching his calms in the right spots. once, you noticed how dae-ho and the 'hyperpigmentation' meme looked alike and decided to give him the same haircut as in the drawing. adding some dark red blush to your masterpiece, you posted it online with his consent. it went viral.
DAE-HO is fully prepared for that time of the month. he knows what you need to ease the cramps, he does not let you get out of bed unless it is to relieve yourself or take a warm shower to relax. when you are done, he ushers you back to bed with his hand softly pushing your back. dae-ho would make sure you were comfortably reclined on some pillows and would position your blanket up to your chin. dae-ho would head to the kitchen, and boil some water in a kettle to make some ginger honey tea to ease the cramps and warm you up. he has the heating pad ready with the tea.
DAE-HO would put on your favourite film, series or cartoon and snuggle you. nevertheless, if you prefer to have some space for whatever reason (the discomfort from your period or only needed personal space), he is out of the bedroom, still checking on you every now and then. he learnt how to deal with mood swings and pre-menstrual syndrome with his sisters, walking on eggshells around them during their cycle (with four sisters, either he was lucky and they had their period around the same time, or each one week of the month).
"babe, if you need anything you can scream my name." he said, his head creeping out of the door frame as you groaned contorting your body to find a position where the cramps were minimal.
DAE-HO knows what pads with wings are! he would go to your local grocery store in a rush to get them for you as well as buy your comfort food. this entire week is focused on you and your comfort. dae-ho just wants to pamper you.
DAE-HO takes pictures of everything, you included. his gallery is full of candid pictures of you and selfies taken together. you with a face mask on, you sleeping, watching television, doing your makeup, in a café, at the grocery store, in a playground at night or playing bowling. everything and anything. he believes you are the most gorgeous woman in the universe and he has to capture your beauty.
IT took dae-ho a while before he allowed himself to be fully vulnerable with you. he wanted to show you his manly side. his protective side. the marine in him. how his father expected him to appear. however, he was nowhere near a macho man, too kind and thoughtful. dae-ho was tender and could not conceal the adoration he held for you. it would be criminal. when he revealed the reason for his enlistment to the marines, it was during a panic attack after a nightmare. you were sleeping soundly. dae-ho had his knees pressed to his chest and struggled to breathe as he felt his chest tighten. he was pulled at his hair harshly (a tactic to feel physical pain instead of emotional pain). he tried to be quiet but his incessant rocking back and forth shook the mattress and awakened you from your slumber.
"baby, are you okay?" you softly asked, cautiously placing your hand on his shoulder. he tensed up and slowly looked up at you. his lips quivered and he burst into tears.
IT took a few moments before he managed to compose himself. his face was buried into your neck, and his hands were clutching at your shirt as soothed him. his body was spasming as dae-ho hiccuped between sobs. he was broken. you handed him some tissues to blow his nose and dry his tears. you grabbed him a glass of cold water and caressed his back as he gulped down the whole drink.
"you can tell me anything dae-ho." you doubled down as you offered him a faint grin. he knew he could trust you. he trusted you with his life. that is when he disclosed everything from his experience in the marines to his father's abuse as well as his mother's submission to the man of the house. how he was a very sheltered kid. how resentful of him his father had grown. how he was forced to join the marines, to make his father proud once in his life. how dae-ho had stopped trying to get his father's acceptance a long time ago and had not heard from him in years. his experience as a marine traumatised. he did not go into details to preserve you from the horror of the military.
YOU were flabbergasted. how could a parent abject his child to such treatment? his baby?
"don't ever hide anything from me, dae-ho. i'm here for you. i love you. i will help you. you're safe with me." you comforted, leaning to give a tender kiss on his forehead. he eventually fell asleep to the sound of your heartbeat.
YOUR LOVER WAS AN OPEN BOOK, OR SO YOU THOUGHT
DAE-HO kept his debt a secret for the entirety of your friendship. as time went on, loan sharks were tenacious and borderline stalking him, cornering dae-ho in dark alleyways. he could not keep his financial burden a secret for long. you find out the hard way, it was an evening without any news from your boyfriend. you had sent him multiple text messages and all were left on 'delivered'. you were getting increasingly anxious, assuming the worst-case scenarios. however, you were not ready for the reality.
YOU heard the front door open and groans from a man. dae-ho. you rushed to him and noticed blood on his face. you were freaking out. you had no first aid kit in the bathroom, unprepared for severe injuries. you had to act quick. you hesitantly grabbed him by the arm and stepped towards your kitchen sink. you seized a washing cloth and socked it in cold water before shakily tapping the fabric onto the open wound on his forehead as he winced. dae-ho was painfully silent. you knew you had to speak up. why was he unreachable for so long? why was he covered in blood? was it his or someone else's? thoughts kept churning around in your head.
"dae-ho... what happened?" you asked, holding his chin up to get a better look at his injury. thankfully, it did not seem too bad.
"i wasn't fully honest with you..." he admitted, grabbing your wrist and carefully placing it down. and then ensued your first serious argument.
DAE-HO despises arguments. the two of you rarely argued as he was helpful around the apartment (which is the bare minimum obviously) and considerate. but when you do, it is mostly over his debt and his insecurities. you keep on telling him he is the one for you and that his debt does not change the man he is, but he is certain you deserve someone who had their life together, not some guy in his late twenties who was a burden. each time, you reassured him by telling him you would always be by his side, through thick and thin. the hardship and obstacles thrown your way could never make you drift apart from the love of your life. furthermore, he is the first one to apologise, no matter what the topic of the argument is, loathing the tense atmosphere in the apartment afterwards.
DAE-HO wants to provide for you (like a "real man" as his father would say). now that you were aware of his financial situation, you insisted on quality time over gifts and spending money on frivolous things. prior to this revelation, dae-ho would get you a small bouquet of flowers on each date, would insist on winning you a prize at these scammers' stands at fun fairs, and would insist on paying most things despite his bank account being in the red.
DAE-HO is not the jealous type. he is very secure in his relationship with you. nevertheless, he would go to battles to defend you. once he got into a fight with a drunk man. the man in his forties had the great idea to follow the two of you and make inappropriate remarks about your body. the man called you derogatory terms that you kept ignoring until he attempted to touch you. dae-ho was quick to intervene. at first, dae-ho was polite with the stranger and firmly demanded for him to leave you alone. instead, the stranger did the opposite and in his drunken state began to attack your boyfriend. bad idea. dae-ho snuck his arm around your waist and walked faster to get away from trouble. the stranger brutally pushed dae-ho and, instinctively and pumped with adrenaline, the ex-marine threw a punch the stranger right in his face, knocking him out cold. dae-ho shook his hand as the impact from the punch hurt his hand, holding his hand up into a fist against his mouth with his eyes shut tightly.
"that was hot." you bluntly stated as you walked away from the scene?
DAE-HO loves to make plans with you for the future. late at night, you would be cuddling in bed and he would bring up how he wanted a big family. growing up in a big family made him want to have one of his own, desiring to be a loving father, unlike the one he had. he is already very good with children. he would make funny faces to try and make kids he encountered outside laugh. he is such a girl dad. gushing about how cute your future daughter would look in her toddler clothes, already picturing himself wearing a tight plastic tiara, seated on a tiny chair and playing pretend with his little girl who would be wearing a princess dress and glitter makeup messily applied on her chubby features. at the end of the day, he understands it would be up to you how many children you would have, if any. after all, you were the one who would go through the body transformations to give birth (one of his sisters was child-free, he was slightly educated on that matter).
DAE-HO wants to marry you. he does not have the money, but he finds himself roaming around jewellery shops, goggling at engagement rings, imagining himself one knee down in front of you making his proposal. for now, he would make paper rings and gift them to you as a token of his unconditional love for you.
nam-gyu’s wanted you for too long to just let his opening go to waste. it’s a shame you’re dating his best friend, and all.
c/w: dark content! cheating (thanos/su-bong x reader), smoking pot, dubcon, exhibitionism, possessiveness, coercion, cunnilingus, rough + unprotected sex, choking
a/n: i have no clue how ooc this is. wrote this w my clit on the keyboard. to the girls who get it, enjoy
with an exhale, smoke poured from your nostrils as you passed the joint back to su-bong, who mutters a “cheers, beautiful.”
the high was settling in. maybe it was just the weed, but nam-gyu’s eyes had been locked onto you since the joint got lit.
he averted his gaze whenever your boyfriend reared his head, of course. save himself an earful. but su-bong’s tight arm around your waist didn’t deter him from staring.
you sinked into the leather couch, craning your neck to find comfort laying your head on su-bong’s shoulder. your eyes met nam-gyu’s when you checked if he was still staring.
shamelessly, he made a show of trailing his eyes down your body, lingering on your tits.
your brain was too fuzzy to give a fuck.
maybe they had all really smoked horny goat weed, since su-bong was planting featherlight kisses to your temple that quickly escalated to ravaging your neck. he had a rough grip around you as if he knew nam-gyu was watching. or maybe you were jut thinking that.
dazed, you didn’t even realise you were leaning, contacting what you thought was the couch until you felt another hand on you.
you craned your neck as best you could at nam-gyu while su-bong was going to town on your clavicle. nam-gyu had a careful hand on your thigh, softly rubbing circles into the skin.
were they both planning to fuck you? - the thought floated through your head.
as su-bong pulled you into a rough kiss, nam-gyu inched closer. you felt his nose poke at your ear. his lips just brushing against the lobe, he sighed.
then su-bong laid on his back and stole you away. he pulled you to lay top of his body, sliding his hands under your shirt of course.
you were too high to care at this point. you felt warmth, was that dampness? hands, so many hands. su-bong’s, nam-gyu’s, who knew anymore.
you came to in the dark. you must’ve all passed out on the couch, laying there like that. lifting your head, you identified your cushion as su-bong’s thighs. you then inspected your lower half - occupied by nam-gyu, cradling your waist with his face in your back.
his hands were on your body. you were close, way closer than you and su-bong were laying. how had it come to this? surely you didn’t wriggle your way here on your own in your sleep.
you try to get up, but nam-gyu’s arms pull you back to him. his chest is hot, pressing against your back. he takes a deep breath into your ear.
“mm, where are you going?”
“nam-gyu..” just as you began to wonder what he wanted, you felt it. you knew exactly what he wanted as it pressed into your ass - where he had pulled you to align with him.
“stay here with me.” he whined, his hands creeping down your shirt, one daring to slip underneath and feel your bare stomach.
“su-bong-” you started, reminding him just where you both were.
“i won’t tell if you don’t.” he chirped in.
a sudden snore from su-bong was like an encouragement. he wasn’t going to know.
your mind was betraying you. but, it was hard to think of your boyfriend, when nam-gyu’s palm was cupping your breast and his boner pressed into you.
”nam-gyu, no.” you had hoped the word was enough. you didn’t move, in fear of waking su-bong up.
“baby,” he cooed, bucking his hips slightly, letting the warmth dig deeper into your ass. against your better judgment, your pussy pulsed at the contact. his other hand slid up to hold your face. “can’t you feel how bad i need it?”
”you’ve got a hand,” you hissed, before abruptly getting up off the couch. su-bong stammered awake, disoriented. you bee-lined for the bathroom.
you washed your hands, avoiding eye contact with the mirror. you couldn’t look at yourself. what the fuck was that? your boyfriend’s best friend was just all over you. you felt disgusting.
and yet, there was this bolt of rush - the secrecy. it was so wrong.
you turned the doorknob, and the door was only ajar before nam-gyu slid in and swiftly shut it behind him. you heard the click of the lock as you stumbled back.
he exhaled a ‘whoo’, biting his nails and scanning his eyes up and down your body. “waiting for me?”
“fuck off.” you were thinking a bit straighter now. you moved to walk past him, but of course, he caught you in both his arms.
he pulled you as close as physically possible, one hand cupping your jaw, the other at your back keeping you stationary. you writhed against his grip.
“i’ve wanted you so fucking bad.” a hand fell to your ass, staying there.
“su-bong is your best friend.”
“hmm, what about it?” he was trailing kisses along your jawline. your flesh filled with goosebumps. you almost flinched at the sensitivity of the contact.
“we’re not doing this, nam-gyu,”
“already are, babe.” his hand on your jaw tightened, turning your head up to face him. his hand on your ass squeezed and pulled you in, rubbing the front of your cunt over his erection. a gasp slipped from your mouth. there were beads of pre-cum dampening his pants.
the air was almost thick and hard to breathe with his desire.
testing the waters, his thumb slid across your bottom lip, parting your mouth open. he slid his thumb onto your tongue.
you felt your body surrendering against your better judgement. instead of flinching from his touch, you were leaning in, like this was natural for you two. like you were meant to fit together like this.
you closed your lips around his thumb and sucked lightly. nam-gyu let out a deep sound from his throat. you could’ve sworn you felt a twitch from his cock.
he muttered a ‘fuck’ before he pulled his hand away and collided mouth with yours, tongue roughly delving in.
you moaned - against your fucking will, you moan, and he’s pulling you in, his hips jolting into you. you don’t know why, but you’re kissing him back, and you’re both sloppy and breathless and it’s so fucking hot.
your high is over, why the fuck were you doing this again? your boyfriend’s outside - god, is he even back to sleep?
you pulled away, the sudden movement causing almost a whine to slip from nam-gyu’s open mouth.
“we really shouldn’t do this, nam-gyu.”
“baby, come on.” he drawled. nam-gyu slid his hands up your body, into your shirt. “i know you want it. just let me.”
his chest met yours, and he was guiding you back. carefully. you stepped with him, watching his eyes. so dark and full of.. need.
your backside made contact with the bathroom counter. nam-gyu leaned his weight onto you, his erection a sharp reminder. he slipped a knee between your legs, digging into your core. you bit your lip.
you closed your eyes, craning your neck up to the ceiling. the exposure allowed nam-gyu to plant soft kisses on your neck. your skin was full of goosebumps, hot and sensitive to the touch.
behind your eyelids, you pictured su-bong. memories flashing of his territorial tendencies - cursing nam-gyu out for standing too close, for staring too long.
“why you looking at my lady like you wanna snatch her, bro?!”
“su-bong, leave it alone.”
and this asshole still found ways around it. the dots were connecting: those not-so-accidental brushes of his hands. how when you looked at him, he was always looking first. the heavy weight of eyes on you when you bent over or stretched, when your boyfriend wasn’t in the room.
you hadn’t been around him enough to think of it as anything. maybe su-bong was always on guard for good reason.
the wet ‘pop’ of nam-gyu’s mouth coming off of sucking your neck was the clear indicator of why.
with hands on his chest you softly pushed him away. something flickered across his eyes. it almost made your knees buckle. he looked like he was fucking starving.
your mind betrays you. he’s not going to know.
and then a voice of reason pipes up: he’ll know if his handsy friend is in the bathroom alone with his girl!!
your head was spinning from the comedown, and was that lust? you were breathing heavily. nam-gyu’s eyes never left you. cautiously, you met his gaze again. he catches your faltering certainty.
“i can be quick,” he reassures, cupping your cheek. he presses a hard kiss to your lips. though, his dick gets the better of his thinking, and he’s parting your mouth open with his own again.
he finally stops himself with a chuckle. “i won’t last, since i’ve wanted this for so long.”
“did you just want to fuck me from the start?” your voice delivered a tad shaky, from the realisation of it all. he was eyeing his best friend’s girlfriend the whole time, and su-bong knew it too. this was his biggest fear come alive.
“you should be mine instead.” he said breathlessly. his hands wildly roamed over your curves. he was covering any surface su-bong possibly could’ve touched before. he was leaving his mark. the hickey blooming on your neck was a stamp of his presence. “let me take you.”
you whimpered his name. it was so, so wrong. and his touch felt so fucking right. the tension was going to crush you alive. suddenly everything outside of this room could get fucked - nam-gyu was here, and you needed him in you now.
your voice was so soft, the ‘please’ from your mouth was barely a noise. but from the pant that left his lips - he heard it. and then he was all over you.
his movements happened in a flurry. his mouth was bruising yours from the force of his kisses. you squealed when he groped your cunt through your pants. he then wasted no time pulling those to your ankles.
“fuck,” he bit his lip, eyes trained on your cunt. his hands on the back of your thighs lifted you up to sit on the bathroom counter. his haste to fuck you had you soaked.
he started palming himself through his pants, panting while he thought to himself. he fell to his knees.
“shit- sorry, i’ll get to it. i just-” he shut himself up by latching his mouth onto your pussy, and you could’ve screamed from the contact. you were already pulsing, which he felt when he slipped two fingers into your aching core.
you felt him cursing at your clit as he lapped at you, whines shamelessly spilling from your mouth. you looked down at him - of course, he was looking first - and you caught his hand underneath his waistband, pumping himself.
nam-gyu’s fingers curled inside you over and over without mercy while he ate you out crazed - like it would be his last meal.
there was a knot tying deep inside you. all you could manage from your mouth was incoherent pleas between moans.
the cold air hitting your cunt made you shiver when he pulled away abruptly. he stood.
“god, shit - are you like this for him?”
pre-cum had made a pool at the front of his pants. his leaking cock sprung free when he yanked the band down. he hooked his arms under your knees, and pulled you close - tip prodding at your entrance. you were already whimpering.
“hm baby? he ever fuck you like i do?” he slings you legs over his shoulders, letting his cock drift over your clit.
“nam-gyu, please-” please stop asking about my boyfriend. please don’t stop what you’re doing.
you split open when he pushes in. his rough kiss to your lips barely smothers your moan.
your head lolls back when he sets his unrelenting pace, fucking you into the wall. his nails leave crescent moons on your thighs with his tight grip.
one hand hooks a thumb under your shirt and lifts it to expose your tits. his palm comes to rest tight around your neck, keeping your head firm against the wall.
“baby, fuck - taking me so fucking good.” his eyes were wild, pupils blown wider than you’d ever seen when he was high. “fuck, kiss me-”
you did. his and your moans were mixing together in sloppy, open-mouthed kisses. he pressed your sweaty foreheads together, lowering a hand to rub circles around your clit. you cried out, feeling the balloon inside you on the verge of popping.
“tell me you’re mine.”
you couldn’t even think of your boyfriend on the other side of your door - your only thoughts were cumming around nam-gyu’s cock.
you whined the words to him, and he rammed you to your shared release. i’m yours, i’m yours, i’m yours.
when the tensing and trembling of your orgasms was finishing, you both slumped together. head on each other’s shoulders, panting.
in the hazy post-sex clarity, you become acutely aware that su-bong is still out there. the noise of the last few minutes has become clear to you. shit.
your train of thought was broken when nam-gyu was caressing the small of your back, softly running his hand up and down.
“i knew i could have you, babe.” he pressed a kiss to your forehead. he ducked low to your ear, his voice a whisper: “once we leave this room, i’m the only one who gets to fuck you.”
you nod shakily - but you were completely unprepared to look your boyfriend (ex?) su-bong in the eye when that door inevitably opened.
nam-gyu just kissed you sweetly, his face splitting in a smile full of affection. “that’s my girl.”
Can you write Namgyu with a kink for humiliating you? I just know this man is a sadist with the way he’s so mean.
It can be making you cry, making you lick his shoes clean, suck his fingers, spitting in your mouth & making you swallow! All while cruelly insulting you calling you a cunt and a bitch.
He loves to embarrass you! You’re just his personal stress-toy in these stressful games <3
(Love your work btw!!!)🎀
holy fuckfbk nam-gyu will always be my fav , hes such a sadist HES SUCH A SADIST you'll be crying and everything literally making such a mess and he'd be staring at you like this: 🫤
guys i got a good twitter vid for this one
(i made reader a bit a bimbo im sry💔)
sadist!nam-gyu x reader <3 warnings: 18+, DARK content, SMUT!!, humiliation kink, knifeplay, humping shoes ❤️🩹, twitter link, dubcon, orgasm denial, death threats (1), degradation, voyeurism, pwp
つ｡☆ when you'd meet at the games, he just immediately sees how fuckable you are. you were bickering him about the stupidest things, he was angry, how you almost lost them the six-legged race, of course you'd defend yourself. without any class, he'd spit on you, out of 'anger'. obviously he only wants to test how you'd respond, the games were getting boring, he needs to release some tension. "fucking swallow, bitch. you'll do that, right?" he says, like it's second nature, it was your first time literally getting spat on! it felt so weird! you'd swallow full of shame, looking him in the eye. "fucking-" his dick would twitch from the sight, like he was taking your virginity. "bitch, you tryna' tease me?" it's like he didn't expect you to do as he says. you were actually so submissive it makes him cry. it makes his dick cry, definitely.
he's probably the type of guy to jerk off right in front of you. he invited you to come and eat with him and his other allies, saying how it's much more safer with a team rather than being alone, but once you finished your lunch and everyone's going somewhere else, nam-gyu shamelessly moves his hands past the waistband of his pants, it makes you panic, scared, and clueless, -- you don't know what to do, the good person in you says to help him :( and you do, offering your hand, tilting your head and asking "do .. do you need me?" nam-gyu knew he is never gonna get enough of you. ever. he scoffs, he was about to bust a nut right there, "don't fucking assume, cunt." but you just wanted to help him :( he swears you knew what you were doing. "do you even have a brain?" you'd freeze, and he removes his hand under his pants to pull your hair to face his groin. "i'm sure you know how to suck. so suck." he doesn't give you any time to think before pushing your head to his clothed dick, making your squirms muffled against his hard-on. "mmph- m-mister-" your drool staining his pants, "take my pants off, duh. are you genuinely stupid?"
now you were forced to take on his dick, because of your 'volunteer' spirit. atleast he was a bit nice about it though.. i mean he did take it slow until the tip of his cock was hitting the back of your throat, after that, it's a different story. "you sick little freak. you offer your services to any person with a cock?" is what you'd hear, and the 'glug glug glug' sound of your throat. "no decent woman would offer herself when she sees a man jerking it." you were taking him in so well, and he was conversing like it was a normal day. "you. are. a. fucking. freak." he'd pull you away from his dick, "answer me, you're a whore aren't you?" he tugs, "what are you?" "a whore..." you whimper. he just laughs, shoving right back into your mouth.
everything was too fast D: you'd swear other men were looking. no they definitely were. probably even stroking their own dicks while watching. player 124 was so lucky.
even after that, your throat was sore, making you unable to speak, it wasn't like you were much of a talker in the first place. you'd stay by him though, even if you could hear nam-gyu tell his experience about you to thanos, saying how 'mediocre' you were. that hurts.. :(
つ｡☆ outside of the games ->
you were probably someone who absolutely loves the idea of 'making love', he'd just absolutely break that ideology in half. :/ you guys wouldn't have met in the club, he probably met you in a dating app. he made himself such a presentable person, deeming himself as a family man raised by his grandmother who loves owning pets, long walks on the beach, cooking for his girl, all that stuff. of course you'd fall in love. your second date was cooking with him, he finds it cute how clumsy you are with the knife, he chuckles, playfully teasing: "you're such a cute dummy." getting behind you, putting his arms on top of yours as he guides you on how to safely cut vegetables. he's such a sweetie.
but.. when he has that knife pressed right to your throat, thankfully not cutting you, his body caging yours on the counter, your back pressed against his chest. whispering, "you're such a dumb bitch, who the fuck believes shit from people who work at the club?" he did have a point, he said he was a club promoter right off the bat, but your view of him did a full 180⁰ real quick.
pushing your pants down, he presses the handle of the knife right in between your legs, making a soft moan escape your lips, how could he think you don't like this?
the knife goes back to your neck, as his other hand was deeply shoving his fingers against your leaking pussy, "you can't cum, alright? m'not afraid to slash your neck." he threatens, he curls his fingers at the same time, how were you gonna survive.??
now when you're trembling right infront of him, he'd stop all forms of physical touch, getting away from you, you'd fall to the ground, mostly because of your legs shaking, and how the knife infront of your throat blocked you from doing any movements. "please, let me cum, please, i've been good..!" you begged, looking up at him. his eyes darkened even more at the sight, you were so desperate, it was hot. "fine. spread your legs."
(this video) <- twt link ^o^
he presses the insides of your thighs to fully spread them wide open. nudging the tip of his shoes on your clit, the friction was good enough </3.
"you're an embarrassment to women, jeez, you're fucking gonna cum from this." he always seems so mad. you shake your head, you're better than this, you swear. he only chuckles from how you're trying to defend yourself, pressing your thighs together as if to close them, you still wanted that sweet release :( " pfft. stop trying to deny it, i'm not gonna let you cum unless you become a worthless whore for me," fuck it, you were desperate, you'd cum from anything at this point. erasing any self dignity, you spread your legs again. props to you, despite his mean nature, he was gonna cum from the sight.
-
lastly, in a group setting, you know he is the biggest boot-licker when it's with his friends at the club, always wanting to impress them and shit, showing how you're his prized possession! he'll make you hang out with his friends, the purple-haired one included, all doing lines and taking puffs of weed, as he "sweetly" guides you to grind on his thigh. saying how: "nobody's gonna notice, they're too high to notice you being so pathetic." and you whine, tears in your eyes because you feel so embarrassed and vulnerable :<, hearing his other friends laugh, you could only hide your face in the crook of nam-gyu's neck. he'd pull on your hair to get you to look at him eye to eye, "you wanted this didn't you? you're asking for it all the time, why not now?" his words are so condescending, it didn't help how your clit is sweetly nudging against the wrinkles of his pants, sometimes you'd even move a bit higher to feel the bulkiness of his belt. or even the tent in his pants in general, but he'll immediately lift you up, because he doesn't wanna give you the satisfaction that he's aroused too!
he's such a perfect guy, you love him. you do. if you actually do, sucks to suck, he thinks you're fucking pathetic.
subby nam-gyu soon? (and kim seowan) prolly will do a few asks, too busy for all this stuff i need sleep! also, guys i love the dark asks, keep them goinnnnnnnnn🥲
Warnings: usual squid game stuff. blood and gore. injury. mentions of suicide. mentions of addiction. drugs. soft thanos. slight canon divergence.
Summary: After an argument about money and debts, Y/N left Thanos. A year later she meets him again in the games yet he does his best to ignore her. During the game of Mingle, Y/N gets thrown out of her room and Thanos comes to her rescue.
Squid Game Masterlist
“Are you being serious?” Y/N asked, sitting down on the chair in disbelief.
Su-bong paced in front of her exasperated. “It was meant to make us more money! You can’t blame me for trying.”
Y/N rolled her eyes. “I told you when you first told me about it that it was a stupid idea. Not only did you ignore me, but you invested more than you said you were going to. And not just your own money, you took some of mine too!”
Su-bong rolled his eyes and Y/N chuckled. How he could be annoyed with her was beyond her. “I can’t believe this. I really can’t.”
“I can do something,” Su-bong said, a hint of desperation in his tone that he was clearly trying to hide. “I can start writing songs again. I can–”
“Don’t lie to me or yourself,” Y/N snapped. “You have been saying that for the past year.”
Su-bong scoffed. “You try to do something like that again when you are turned into a laughing stock!”
“And who’s fault was that?” Y/N said. “I was the one who advised you to not take those pills before the performance and you did it anyway. You have no one to blame but yourself.”
“Aren’t you meant to be my girlfriend? Isn’t it your job to support me?” Su-bong questioned.
“I do support you, but I know when to draw the line,” Y/N replied. “I don’t support you basically gambling your entire life savings and mine all on what was clearly a scam from the start. I don’t support you going out every night getting high using pills you bought with my money. And as far as I know, you are supposed to support me too.”
“I do support you,” Su-bong defended, clearly offended.
“Give me one example where you supported me over the past year,” Y/N said. Su-bong remained silent, giving Y/N the answer she needed. “The fact that you can’t even name one explains it all,” Y/N said. “You weren’t there for me when I was fired from my job. When my father was sick. When I broke my leg and could barely get around.”
“I can support you,” Su-bong said, grasping Y/N’s hands. “I can get us money. I can get it back–”
“No,” Y/N said and pulled her hands from his. Despite how she felt in the situation, she couldn’t help but miss the warmth of them. But she knew that what she was about to do was the right decision for her. “I can’t do this anymore. Not only did you continuously lie to me, but you stole money from me dragging me down with you.”
“Y/N, please,” Su-bong begged. “Don’t do this.”
Y/N pressed her lips into a thin line. There was a time when they had had this conversation before. Then she had stayed and Y/N was coming to realise that it was a stupid decision. Despite it all, she did still love him. But she couldn’t forgive him–not this time. “Are you begging me only because you have nowhere else to go or because you still love me?”
There was a brief moment of hesitation. It was at most a few seconds but those few seconds were arguably the most important. “Of course I love you!”
Slowly, Y/N nodded. “I see.”
“Y/N, please,” Su-bong begged. “I’ll get a job. Fuck, I’ll get two jobs. I can fix this.”
“You are over one billion won in debt!” Y/N exclaimed. “Do you really think a few shitty jobs are going to fix that anytime soon? At least my job pays a decent wage but it is still nowhere near to pay off my own debts which you forced me into. No, I’m done this time,” Y/N said, keeping a steady tone despite the way she wanted to cry out and forgive him instantly. “Please leave. I’ll have your things sent to you.”
“You can’t kick me out!” Su-bong exclaimed.
“You don’t rent this apartment, I do,” Y/N said, avoiding his gaze. “Please leave Su-bong. You’re making this harder than it needs to be.”
He scoffed. “I can’t believe I ever loved you.”
Y/N’s gaze remained fixated on the table before her until his footsteps grew distant and the front door was opened and slammed shut, plummeting the apartment into silence. The moment she knew she was actually alone, Y/N allowed the tears to flow. She knew that this decision was for the best, after all their relationship over the past year had been far from a whirlwind romance. Y/N couldn’t remember the last time they had even slept in the same bed.
But somehow she already had the urge to run out and tell him to come back and that they could work everything out together. Y/N’s hands gripped the arms of the chair, grounding herself. She couldn’t do that. Leaving him was for the best– even if she didn’t believe it just yet.
***
The platform began to move, the number of players in the room was considerably less compared to the first round. She was standing on her own as she looked at the puddles of blood on the floor. There had yet to be someone Y/N had become allies with, the group she was with for the pentathlon were already a small alliance of four and she only joined them because they needed a fifth person. Everyone else already seemed to have their own group apart from her.
It wasn’t that Y/N hadn’t tried. The moment she had seen her ex-boyfriend run up to that voting button and confidently chose to continue the game, she had tried her best to speak with him. Despite the fact that she was the one who broke up with him, it was nice and comforting to see a familiar face, even if that familiar face was high out of his mind every single time she tried to speak with him.
Four different times Y/N had tried to speak to Su-bong and each time he wouldn’t give her the time of day. It irritated her more than she cared to admit though deep down she couldn’t blame him. After all she was the one who had kicked him out.
She glanced at him from across the platform and noticed him already staring at her. Upon noticing this, he quickly looked away from her. If she made it through this round, she would make him speak to her whether he wanted to or not.
“Two players,” the voice called out.
There was no hesitation as Y/N grabbed the person closest to her and began to drag them to the yellow room right before her eyes. The round was carnage as people pushed and shoved and fought each other to get to a room in time. There were 126 players left, only 100 would be able to make it through the round.
Just as the person she dragged opened the door, Y/N spared a glace in the direction Su-bong ran and found him and Player 124 dragging people out of the way of the door before running into it themselves. Y/N turned back to her room and slammed the door behind her just as Su-bong looked in her direction before he slammed his door closed.
Once the door was closed, Y/N allowed herself to breathe and finally relax for a moment. She looked at the person she had dragged. “Are you okay? I didn’t hurt you when I dragged you, did I?”
Before the woman could even muster a response, the door was forcibly pushed open and a firm grip squeezed Y/N’s arm, pulling her out of the room as an older man forced his way inside.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Y/N yelled, kicking and hitting the man as he tried to push her out of the room.
“I’m not dying today!” the man hissed.
Y/N pulled her arm from the man’s grasp and before he knew it, a fist was flying at her face, her vision blurring immediately. A force pushed Y/N outside of the room and she fell to the floor.
“Fuck you!” Y/N yelled at the man inside.
Y/N glanced around at the clock and panic instantly rose within her. There were ten seconds left on the countdown and all hope left her body. There was no possible way she was going to find a partner and a room in time. Y/N slowly stood to her feet, already accepting her fate.
There were a few people still on the platform either hurt from someone or accepting their fate. Others were still trying to force their way inside rooms and fight for them. Slowly, Y/N closed her eyes. At least in her final moments she wouldn’t have to see the carnage surrounding her.
Before Y/N knew it, she was quite literally swept off her feet. Her eyes opened and immediately recognised the mop of purple hair and she let out a small noise of surprise. Without a moment of hesitation, Su-bong ran into a blue room and slammed the door behind him just as the door locked, breathing heavily.
As the gunshots sounded out, his grip tightened on her as he slumped down to the floor, Y/N still in his arms.
“Su-bong?” Y/N muttered, still in disbelief that he had saved her. She stood from his hold and shakily got to her feet.
“Why were you just standing there?” Su-bong asked, raising his voice. “Do you want to die?”
“I was thrown out of the room,” Y/N said. “There wasn’t enough time to find someone else and find a room.”
Su-bong stood to his feet, his eyes wide. “Why wouldn’t you at least try?”
“Why would you care?” Y/N said. “Evidently from the way you have refused to even speak to me here, you wouldn’t care whether I lived or died.”
“Of course I care!” he exclaimed.
“Then why haven’t you spoken to me since we’ve been here?” Y/N questioned. “I have tried so many times to speak with you, thankful to see a familiar face, and you have shut me down every single time! Is it about the drugs you’ve been taking? I know that I don’t like it when you take them but honestly right now I don’t care. All I have wanted to do is speak with you.”
Su-bong scoffed. “Now you want to speak to me? What about the past year? You never wanted to speak to me when I reached out.”
“The circumstances were different and you know it,” Y/N snapped.
“How?” He asked. “I’m just doing exactly what you’ve been doing to me.”
Y/N sighed, forcing herself not to roll her eyes. “For once, imagine being in my place. Imagine supporting your partner for a year after their career took a plummet, you start paying for everything. Food, clothes, sometimes even their drugs when they begged you.”
At that statement, Su-bong glanced down at the necklace hanging from his neck.
“Then you find out that they had an amazing idea to invest in crypto that turned out to be a scam,” Y/N continued. “Not only did they stupidly invest their entire life savings, but then you find out that they have been taking small amounts of money from your account too. Now leaving themselves in debt as well as you. In between all of this, imagine them going out early in the morning and either returning high out of their mind where you need to stay up and take care of them all night or they don’t return at all and you spend the whole night worried about where they are and if they are even alive.”
Y/N took a step closer to Su-bong. “Imagine if our positions were switched. You wouldn’t want to speak to me again either. But you have no idea how hard it was for me, because despite it all– somehow I still loved you. You fucked me over and I still loved you.” A shaky breath left Y/N. “So, I’m sorry if I didn’t want to talk to you. I’m sorry if I ignored you for a year. I’m sorry I couldn’t do more to help you, but I needed to put myself first for once.”
The silence in the room was deafening. The gunshots had ceased and the guards were clearing up the bodies. The numbers who hadn’t made it sounded through the speaker but Y/N didn’t listen as she only stared at Su-bong who hadn’t met her eyes the whole time she spoke.
Slowly she took another step towards him and brought her hand up and placed it under his chin and forced him to meet her eyes. “You always did have trouble making eye contact when we were having a serious conversation.” His pupils were blown wide from the pill Y/N had watched him take before the game. “Why did you save me?”
Su-bond blinked once, then twice as if he was confused by the question. “What?”
“I watched you run into a room with your friend, pulling people out of the way for it. You were safe. Why did you risk your life to save me?” Y/N asked.
“You were watching me? Señorita, I’m touched,” Su-bong said, his tone flirtatious. Y/N knew this behaviour all too well, sometimes she used to fall for it.
Y/N frowned. “Be serious for a minute. I don’t want you to be ‘Thanos’. I want you to be Su-bong. My Su-bong.”
Surprise seemed to fill his eyes and he seemed to unconsciously lean into her touch as his eyes flicked to the side. “I watched you run into a room, I thought you were safe so I entered a room. When I looked out and saw you were standing outside, I ran out without thinking.”
“Did you know that there was a room available?” Y/N questioned.
If possible, the room became quieter. “Why did you do it?”
“I couldn’t leave you out there,” he admitted. “I couldn’t leave you to die.”
“But you could have died in the process?” Y/N questioned. “How stupid could you be?”
Su-bong’s eyes met Y/N’s once more. His pupils were still dilated but Y/N could see his true emotions shining through clear as day. Vulnerability.
“Do you know where I was when that man in a suit offered me that card?” Su-bong said, his voice strangely quiet. “I was on a bridge ready to jump and take my life. So I don’t care if I die in these games. But if you died, I couldn’t handle that. When I ran out, I thought that we would either both live or we would both die.”
Su-bong’s hands slowly moved until they held onto Y/N’s waist. The feeling of it so familiar but so foreign. “I tried to convince myself that I didn’t care about you, that if you died, I wouldn’t feel anything. I tried to convince myself that I was angry at you for turning your back on me. But when I saw you standing outside that room prepared to die, I realised that none of that was true. I still love you, baby. Even though I’m pissed that you joined these games.”
“It’s not like I had any choice,” Y/N shrugged as she cupped his face gently, her eyes stinging.
Su-bong glanced down guiltily. “I’m sorry.”
“I know,” Y/N said, her thumb brushing along his cheekbone. “Someone who wasn’t sorry wouldn’t risk their life to save their ex-girlfriend who kicked them out with nowhere to go”
A huff of a laugh left Su-bong as he dipped his head down resting his forehead against Y/N’s. “Looking back, I can’t blame you.”
Y/N’s eyes closed as she savoured the feeling of his closeness. If she imagined hard enough, she could pretend that they weren’t trapped in a series of deathly games. They would be in her apartment, her doing her own work while Su-bong worked on a new song, happily sitting side by side. Just how it was for four years before his career blew up and things spiralled from there.
“Vote to leave,” Y/N whispered. “We can get out of here and we can work things out. I know that you said that you…don’t care if you die in these games, but I don’t want to watch that. If we vote to leave, we can pay off our debts together and work things out between us– properly this time.”
Suddenly a warm pressure captured Y/N’s lips. The feeling was one she had missed. Her body fell into his as she wrapped her arms around Su-bong’s neck as she deepened the kiss. His arms wrapped around her waist before he turned their bodies until her back was pressed against the wall.
Y/N pulled away and allowed herself to look into Su-bong’s eyes for a brief moment before she leaned in once more. The kiss held a hint of desperation behind it, as if one of the guards would enter the room and gun them down that very second. Su-bong’s hands slid from her waist to her hips, giving them an experimental squeeze.
A content sigh left Y/N as she threaded her fingers in his hair and Su-bong smiled into the kiss. He pulled away, breath mixing with hers. “Jump, señorita,” he muttered.
“I always hated you calling me that,” Y/N mumbled against his lips.
“You loved it,” Su-bong replied as he picked her up and her legs immediately wrapped around him as he deepened the kiss.
It wasn’t until now when Y/N realised how much she had missed him and how perfectly they fit together. It had been a year since he had last touched her this way and it was as if no time had passed.
“I missed this,” he muttered, lips attaching to her jaw before peppering soft kisses down the side of her neck.
“Me too,” Y/N sighed, tilting her head back as she savoured the feeling of his lips on her skin. She could only wish that they were in her apartment, gradually making their way towards the bed.
Instead Y/N was brought back to her harsh reality.
“Attention players, the game is now over.”
The door clicked and unlocked and Su-bong reluctantly detached his lips from Y/N’s neck. They stared at one another breathlessly. Y/N’s legs were still wrapped around his hips and her fingers were tangled in his hair– only messing the strands up even more.
Slowly, Su-bong set her back on her feet, hands slipping up her body to her waist. The footsteps of the other players broke the two from the daze they were in as Su-bong slowly stepped back, allowing Y/N space to step away from the wall.
“We can get out of here together,” Y/N whispered as she slipped her hand in Su-bong’s. “Please vote to leave.”
The door was opened and a guard stood in the threshold, gun clutched in their hands unafraid to use it. Y/N and Su-bong slowly stepped out of the room and joined all of the other players as they exited the game. Neither of them spoke though their hands remained clutching one another tightly.
“Thanos!” Player 124 said as he nudged Su-bong’s shoulder. “What was that for? If it weren’t for those pricks outside the room, I’d be dead.”
“You’re alive aren’t you?” Su-bong said the tone of his voice shifting to something more distant. A tone he never spoke to Y/N in. A tone that she knew was purely for other people.
Player 124 glanced at Y/N and his eyes trailed down to where her hand was linked with Su-bong’s before his eyes fixated on the red patch stuck to her jacket. A quiet huff of acknowledgement slipped past his lips. “I hope this bitch won’t make you change your mind about playing one more game.”
Su-bong’s head whipped around fast to face Player 124. “Don’t fucking call her that, man.”
Player 124 laughed. “Whatever you say. But remember. One more game.” He slipped back into the crowd of people– significantly smaller than when they had first entered.
“You need to make better friends,” Y/N commented watching Player 124 leave with distaste.
“And you need to make friends,” Su-bong defended as he pulled Y/N along with the rest of the crowd. “I’ve seen you sadly standing around on your own since we’ve been here.”
“Sorry for not wanting to get attached to anyone in a place where I could die,” Y/N replied.
Su-bong huffed a laugh and squeezed her hand. “You have me now.”
“Only until the vote?” Y/N asked, her heart dropping slightly.
There was a brief moment of hesitation as he glanced down at the blue patch on his jacket. After a while he slowly nodded and Y/N let out a soft sigh of relief.
“Only if you promise to not kick me out again,” Su-bong muttered as he threw his arm around Y/N’s shoulders, keeping her pressed to his side.
“I promise,” Y/N replied as he pressed a kiss against the top of her head. “Only if you promise to work things out between us.” Y/N glanced at his necklace. “That includes your addiction. I know it will be hard, but I will be with you every step of the way.”
Su-bong looked at the cross necklace hanging from his neck and let out a long sigh. “Okay, señorita. You have a deal.”
“I told you not to call me that,” Y/N muttered.
“I know that you love it,” Su-bong said. “You always did. Especially when I–”
“Let’s leave that talk for when we are out of this hellhole,” Y/N said, lightly shoving him away from her.
A quiet laugh left Su-bong as Y/N looked up at him, a small spark in his eye shone brightly. It was the first time she had seen it in years. Y/N’s lips twitched up as she savoured his touch, hope filling her heart for the first time she had woken up in this god-forsaken place. Y/N linked their fingers together once more as they walked through the colourful staircase for what would hopefully be the final time.
warnings — MDNI 18+ ．rough sex．dysfunctional relationship． nam-gyu being an awkward asshole author’s note — was kinda drunk when i drafted this, so… this may not be my best work
how had my life come to this?
you’d asked yourself a hundred times how your life had spiraled into a game of death over unpaid debts, but this? this was a new low.
NAM-GYU never bothered to hide his disdain for you—cutting you off mid-sentence, shoving past you without apology, and calling you every name under the sun whenever you so much as looked at him wrong. you’d stopped wondering what his problem was long ago. eventually, you just chalked it up to him being a miserable bastard who needed someone to take it out on.
for whatever reason, that someone was always you.
then thanos started flirting with you—it didn’t mean anything—just a brief distraction in a hellhole where people were mercilessly killed over childhood games, but apparently, it was enough to push nam-gyu’s irritation to a whole new level. he couldn’t stand you before, but now it seemed like everything you did irked him even more.
and yet, here you were, shoved into a bathroom stall with the same man who’d sworn he hated you, his body pinning yours against the door. you’d lost count of how many times he’d made you come, but that didn’t really matter.
you hated him too. no, scratch that—you still hated him. maybe not with the same fervour as before, but you sure as hell didn’t like him now. not even a little.
“thought you liked when he gave you attention,” nam-gyu sneered, breath hot against the shell of your ear. “was it fun? letting him look at you like that?” his words were punctuated with a sharp thrust, forcing a strangled gasp from your lips.
“what the hell are you talking about?” you hissed, trying to crane your head over your neck to shoot a glare at him, but nam-gyu’s hand was already gripping your jaw, tilting your head back until it rested against his shoulder.
“open,” you obeyed without thinking, lips parting to allow him to slip two digits into your mouth. the cool press of his ring grazed your lips, and you gagged slightly when his fingers hooked deeper, pressing down on your tongue as his pelvis ground into you with bruising force.
“you just don’t get it, do you?” the words poured out in a disjointed rush. “all this time, i’m right there, and you let him—” his voice broke off in a frustrated growl, and he shoved you harder against the door, hips snapping forward and sheathing himself to the hilt. you moaned around his fingers, and he cursed under his breath when he felt you clench around him.
“you’re mine now. got it?”
you nodded as best you could, his fingers still in your mouth making it impossible to respond properly. that must have been enough because nam-gyu lowered his head, trailing deceptively gentle kisses along your shoulder.
“good. ‘cause i fucking–” his teeth sank into your flesh, hard. the sharp pain startled you, and your teeth bit down reflexively, breaking skin. the metallic tang of blood coated your tongue, but if he noticed, he gave no indication.
“—hated seeing you look at someone else like that,”
he slammed you flat against the door, grasping your hips with bruising force as he rutted into you. the door hinges creaked under the onslaught, his movements relentless and animalistic, chasing his release with single-minded intensity. curse words spilled from his lips, gradually breaking down into incoherent groans as his pace quickened, each thrust sloppier than the last.
in a final, shuddering motion, he came hard, his arms wrapped around you tightly, crushing you to his chest as he trembled against you.
whimpering.
he stayed like that for a while, his breath coming in ragged bursts, the heat of it fanning across the back of your neck. slowly, nam-gyu pulled his bloodied fingers from your mouth, the faint tang of copper lingering on your tongue. warm lips traced soft kisses along your shoulder, the earlier aggression melting into something that could almost be described as…tender.
you stiffened.
the intimacy of it was almost worse than the roughness. worse than the fact that this had happened at all.
without thinking, you shoved him off.
nam-gyu let out a grunt as he stumbled back, catching himself on the wall. he stared at you for a second, then just rolled his eyes and started pulling on his clothes. neither of you said anything. the silence stretched on, broken only by the rustle of fabric.
“are you voting ‘yes’ tonight?”
you paused at his question, wiping at a smudge of blood near your mouth. your life was already a disaster—this situation was a perfect example.
“i’m here, aren’t i?”
his lips twitched into a faint smirk, one that didn’t quite reach his eyes. you rolled your eyes and pushed past him, leaving the stall without another word.
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