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DEAR READER
Sade Olutola

if i look back, i am lost
Keni
wallacepolsom

ellievsbear
cherry valley forever
we're not kids anymore.
will byers stan first human second
Mike Driver
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

#extradirty

No title available
occasionally subtle
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
$LAYYYTER

Love Begins
trying on a metaphor

Discoholic šŖ©

Andulka

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Singapore
seen from Malaysia

seen from Germany

seen from Japan

seen from Singapore
seen from Netherlands
seen from Pakistan
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia

seen from Singapore
seen from Cambodia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
@mediocre-confessions-blog
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I LOVE MYSELF BECAUSE...
Because I didn't think I was ugly until the fifth grade,
When one of my guy classmates called me fat in the
classroom.
Because in the sixth grade I made a treaty
with my bestfriend to skip breakfast.
And lunch.
And dinner.
Because I was so sick of loathing in dressing
rooms,
Squeezing my body into clothes that would not fit.
Or Ā self-pities everytime I am not satisfied with
how do I look with different clothing.
Because I never hated myself anymore,
Than when I was trying to hunch over a toilet bowl,
Trying to throw up every awful and dreadful thing inside
me,
Food,
Words,
Thoughts.
Trying to purge out the
Ugliness,
The sadness.
Because these were the things I thought I had
to do,
I was supposed Ā to do,
To make myself beautiful.
To make myself Ā pleasing.
But there is no beauty found on the smell of vomit.
And the everlasting taste of Ā self loathing.
And embracing the thoughts of a low self-esteem.
Because recovery is not a smooth,
paved road.
With given signs and directions.
But a rocky mountain,
With narrow cliffs and shaky stones,
That must be climbed.
Because girls start to hate themselves,
Before they even know themselves.
Because magazines will preach
acceptance on page nine.
And how to achieve a 'sexy' body
on page thirteen.
Because when I say I am fat,
I'm told I'm beautiful instead,
And I don't understand why I cannot be
both.
Because I tore my body down,
When I should have been building my
foundations.
Because I am growing.
And I am learning.
And I am accepting.
And I am deserving.
Disclaimer: Sarili ko tong gawa hella yes hahahaha
Everybody deserves to be okay about who they are
anon
Sabi mo...
Sabi mo noon ipagsisigawan mong mahal mo ako,
Ngunit bakit ngayon kahit ang pagbulong nito sa hangin ay di mo na magawa?
Pagtatapat ng Isang Pangkaraniwan
Huwag mo akong piliting magsalita,
Dahil ginawa ko na, at walang nakinig.
Huwag mo akong piliting makihalubilo,
Dahil ginawa ko na, at walang lumapit.
Huwag mo akong piliting makipaglaro,
Dahil ginawa ko na, at walang sumali.
Gusto ko lamang ring iparating bilang isang pangkaraniwan;Ā
Huwag mo rin akong piliting makipagsabayan katulad mo,
Dahil hindi ako kumportable at may sarili akong paraan.
At higit sa lahat...
Huwag mo rin akong piliting magmahal ng katulad nang sa iyo,
Dahil higit sa lahat may sarili akong paraan.
Marcos Burial Rant (nang super slight!)
SORRY.Ā
Salitang tanging hinihingi nating marinig mula sa mga Marcos para magkaroon naman na ng kapatawaran at katahimikan ang lahat. Ngunit bakit sobrang hirap silang ibigay iyon?
(here comes my hugot rant)
Mabuti pa nga sa crush ko, lagi kong naririnig ang salitangĀ āSorryā dahil di nita kayang ireciprocate ang feelings ko para sa kanya. Eh sa mga Marcos? Patigasan pa. Pakapalan pa ng mukha. Pamanhidan pa.
New Bound Friend
I have a new bound friend. Hoping to meet him for the very first time in personal after this sem (which is on December huehue)...---``
Ayoko muna na masyadong magshare. Baka mabati at di matuloy. Or worse mawala pa hahahaha so yea enjoy the moment~
I'm that mediocre type of friend and most of the time I'm not fine with it.
self thought
āThis will be the last time I swear,
but for now let me seize the momentā
someday someone is gonna be so soft and gentle with your heart, youāre gonna be so glad you kept it open, youāre gonna wonder why you ever thought about quieting it down
All We Know, an album by The Chainsmokers on Spotify
lit as fuck ugh
ACHIEVEMENT RATHER
Hey googley e-diary. Prior to you information, did you know that Iām undergoing a dietary process? Ibig kong sabihin nagdidiet na kamo si gagita himala diba hahahaha. Kahit mahirap isuko ang pagmamahal sa pagkain dahil yun na lang ang natira sa akin. Ginawa ko. Well not totally. Binawasan ko lang naman talaga yung amount ng mga kinakain ko kasi mabibigla katawan ko.
Then recently, Iāve seen progressing results. Iām starting to lose some weight. But damn Iāve also noticed that itās too slow-poke rather (hindi naman sa nagmamadali akong pumayat pero ganun talaga nakikita ko. Sobrang bagal as in *bow*) Ā so I leveled it up by adding some work-out exercises that can be just simply done at home.Ā
Slowly and surely as fuck. Thatās how I describe my progress. And Iām gay as hell because my close friends have noticed the changes in my physical appearance. Not that I hate my body before..---
āI know I love myself now, but I have decided to love myself even more...ā
Book of the day:Ā The Light Between OceansĀ by M.L. Stedman
Get theĀ FREE Kindle Reading App
Je suis desole
Je suis desole. For not updating you upon my oh-so-boring life threadmill for a long time. Fuck those days of cut off net connections. Fuck everything that hinders me to post in this e-diary. Fuck him (just kidding).Ā
Well starting from this day onwards I wish to frequently update and jive up with the events that happened to the ever mignonne mademoiselle (thatās me. just being egoistic rn)Ā
Au revoir!~
Donāt Worry
Donāt worry, soon I will not bother you that much.
Donāt worry, soon I will not expect even a single damn text or call from you.
Donāt worry, soon I will not crave for your prior attention.
Donāt worry, soon I will be busy and will not think about you that much.
Pero please lang. Sa ngayon at bukas, pwede bang maging makasarili ako? Pwede ka bang makiramdam kahit saglit lang? Kung pwede nga lang.....
Book of the day:Ā The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
Get theĀ FREE Kindle Reading App
If This Is What It Takes
The hell with this. Nahulog na daw siya sa iba. Nakakagago lang. I therefore came out with this conclusion -- Hindi niya kaya ang LDR. Madali siyang madala sa bugso ng damdamin. Maattach ganun. Pero ang gulo niya. I was like just settling our label as friends but ayaw niya. Halatang halata. This is a real bullshit talaga. Nakakalito. Mas nakakahilo pa ito sa paggawa ko ng articles huehue
I will be fine, journal. Donāt worry :). And also, I apologize. Naisipan lang ulit kitang buksan kasi may nangyaring malungkot sa buhay kong kay boring :(. I hope someday youāll talk to me to knock off my hard-headed head and would rant to make me clear about things.Ā