if you were gay -Â originally from avenue q
AH, AN AFTERNOON ALONE WITH MY FAVORITE HUMAN ROMCOM â âSERENDIPITYâ. NO ASSHOLE TO PESTER ME. HOW COULD MY DAY GET ANY BETTER?
oh my god karkat, you will never guess what happened to me on pesterchum this morning. dave was talking to me. completely unironically!
THAT IS SO FUCKING INTERESTING.
...mmmhmm, he was being unusually friendly. do you think he was coming on to me? do you think he thinks iâm⊠gay?
UH, OK. WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS? DO I CARE? OH RIGHT, I DONâT. HOW IS YOUR HUMAN ECTO-SISTER?
jeez karkat, you do not have to get so defensive.
IâM NOT GETTING FUCKING DEFENSIVE! WHY WOULD I GIVE A SHIT WHAT STRIDER SAID TO YOU? IâM TRYING TO WATCH THIS MOVIE.
well, i did not mean anything by it, karkat. i just think it is something we can talk about, being friends and all.
I DONâT WANT TO FUCKING TALK ABOUT IT, JOHN. WE ARE DONE HERE.
ok, fine. but just so you know
 JOHN. IâM TRYING TO WATCH THIS MOVIE. ⊠JEGUS FUCK, EGBERT!
JOHN, ALLOW ME TO ENJOY MY ROMCOM.
because you're dear to me
 i'm happy just talking to you
âMAYBE THE ABSENCE OF SIGNS IS A SIGN.â
so what should it matter to me
what pails you fill with troll guys?
JOHN, THIS IS GETTING UNCOMFORTABLE.
IâM NOT FUCKING LISTENING.
but iâd stay out of your way
you were just born that way