This series follows reader and maul from when they were both padawa/aprentice to ( as far as i have planned) the end of revenge of the sith.its slowburn. Pr1 Prt2
Summary: ❥ back on corruscant reader finds out the order isn’t what it seems
Read on ao3
Masterlist
Words: ❥ 10k+
Tw: ❥ angst but its semi resolved by the end 𖧷
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Dried jelly stuck to your skin, clammy and cold. The last bit of the iciness of Illum clinging onto you. Only worsened by the wool blanket desperately trying to keep warm. Kicking your legs you rid yourself of the woven fabric. Finally awake enough to recognise your surroundings- the temple.
High ceilings curving into slender pillars. It always amazed you how these tree twig shaped structures could hold up the upper levels of the temple. The ceiling panels themselves were painted into murals that spanned all of the hall. Force users from across time and space showing their personal feets. You were beneath the siblings Csol and Cami. An old myth that came from the cold planet Csilla. The Chiss believed that the two of them pulled their sun across the sky being endlessly chased by the red star eating wolves.
Jedi saw both as force sensitive since Csol saw the sun being eaten before they took the star into their carriage and Cami kept the wolves at bay by pushing them to the borders of the sky where they formed the clouds.The third sight ability was extraordinarily rare, only found in a few species across the galaxy, the women of the Chiss being amongst them. You only found out about that last part later after you’ve found a book about the jedi mythology in further detail meaning you kept trying to unlock the third sight for months. In the end, the wolves must have won since the planet froze over after the sun started dimming.
You looked farther in the hall to the bed beneath the grandmaster Chuang’s painting - Obiwan's favourite. Rand told you that but he wasn’t there.Craining your sore neck to the bacta tanks on your left you tried to find him. At Least 10 bacta tanks were all lined up, one of them having been emptied out recently. The colour matched the goo on your skin. Obi wans headwound must have been sticked up and then patches with bacta instead of a tank .You picked at the gunk on your arm.
The halls of the healing were only meant for emergencies. You should go look for him.You went to stand up when medical jedi Y’not Chopper turned the corner. He scrambled to lay you back down. Pulling the blanket back over your body mumbling something you didn’t quite catch. The ewok was one of the few non galactic basic speakers in the order. Normally padawan were supposed to pick it up when they came in. You wondered if that was why he ended up in the medical corps.
“ I need to find Obiwan, master Chopper.” You made another attempt to get up. Absentmindedly rubbing your leg as you got set up on the side of the bed. The piercing pain has dissipated to an itch.
“Danvay weechu ah seefo” you tried to break down his sentences. Seefo meant hurt. You remembered him saying something similar to Rank when you had walked in with her broken nose all those moons ago.That made enough sense. He had his hands full with an injured politician that day, serving the galactic empire just like anybody else.
“ I know I know” you fought back against his hands trying to inspect your leg “but I'm feeling fine. I'll come straight back. I promise” you just needed to know if he was alright.
“Choo doo” he stated,dropping the pants leg. He lifted his paw to his blue hat scratching his ear. His red cross was stitched right above the lip of his cap. Y’not was well meaning from what you remember, yet he was surrounded by loneliness. The medical corps was far smaller than the others since force healing was taught more and more to Jedi knights. Even so the ewoks survival instincts lead him to be so sufficient in healing techniques that even master windu would come visit him still most jedi knights tried to fix themselves- youthful arrogance was what Master Windu called it.
However you couldn’t remember the two of them having a non medical conversation. The only person you had ever seen do so was master yoda. They spoke once before in the temple's garden. From what you eavesdropped he was reminiscing about tana- the ewokese word for Endor. You looked it up in the library later. As much as you knew about the green planet, it wasn't a mystery why Master Chopper wasn't part of the agricultural corps. Deep sadness making its way to his fur covered face at the mention of the plant filled paradise.They spoke some more while you slipped away.
Now he laid his palms open over each other,closing his beady eyes to focus. A green hue floated above your clothed leg, bobbing in the air like a bubble of water. The itch fell away in a second. The little doctor pointed at your toes which you followed to wiggle. He nodded.
“Acha ,meechoo chesl wee jeerota”
Jeerota meant friend. Master Yoda had used the same term that night, laying his hand on the shoulder of Y’not. Talking about a species name you never found in any of the books in the library.Maybe lonely creatures are meant to stick together. You had heard the word chesl before as well, the politician had tossed it at him. Probably one of the few words that man knew- fetch. Treating the helping ewok like a dog. Yet master Chopper stayed kindhearted, treating the floundering fool as any other.
“ Thank you, master Chopper,” you answered, laying back down. If he could go get him that meant that Obiwan was alright.
The ewok walked away in a huff grumbling “Lurd theesa” under his breath. You would have called him out on it but then you would have to explain why you knew “silly baby” in ewokese. No one likes eavesdroppers.
you finally took some time to take a closer look at your injuries. The gashes on your limbs had formed small hair like scabs that would clearly heal over time. The once on your hands were already peeling leaving the skin underneath a little discoloured. You wondered how much time had passed by now. Your entire body was sore, you hadn’t noticed it earlier, too distracted by all that had happened. You rubbed your shoulders, kneading up to your neck.
Your fingers grazed rough elevated skin, hot to the touch. The cause was a scab so big it barely fitted in your hand.the edges jagged as if ribbed through instead of the clean cuts of maul’s nails which decorated your hands and shin. A bite- your bite.
You leapt out the bed, bare feet running to the closet mirrored surface. The bite reflected clearly onto the empty bacta tank. The little gel droplets shining the wound back tenfold. Maybe you were hallucinating,just your mind trying to process the past events.You pulled at the scab, slowly clear red blood started pooled on your skin.This was more than guilt; the wound was real. You covered it with your collar. Would Maul be confronted by deep claw marks as well?
You didn’t get time to sit with it. As you wobbled back to your bed, Obi wan came running past the corner leaving behind a grumbling medical jedi. You shared a quick apologetic look with the ewok which he returned with a nod of his head. You hoped he understood how grateful you were.
Obi wans head was bound tied messing up the little hair he had left. The right side of his head was almost entirely covered with thick white ropes leaving small spaces open to see his scalp while the left side of his head was just covered by his longish auburn hair. You tried to ignore the shaveline down the middle. What couldn’t be ignored was the smile on his face, broad and welcoming. He was saying something you didn’t catch.
He joined you on the cot, denting the mattress with his weight. His legs met the floor while yours were dangling just a little of the marble surface. Now that he was so much closer you could easily see that he was wearing his sleeping clothes- no wonder master Y’not was so hesitant. His eyes scan the scars along your hands, remorse creeping up in them- leave it to Obiwan to be so soft.
“You know you should have done that alone. Master Doku said you ran off before he could help” he tsked his tongue on the end but it didn’t have the annoyance it once held. You were irritated by the assumption- guess Dooku covered his hide. You gave Obiwan an aggravated glance.
"Im just saying your wounds would have been less severe or non existent. You wouldn’t have been in that tank for a week” he had picked his arms up in defence, flailing his hands from the bacta tanks to you.
You were out for a week.
“Did you finish your lightsaber? “ you asked.
He looked giddy, fumbled with his belt. Making you look away on instinct. You wouldn’t show him your disappointment. It wasn’t his fault that you felt some form of allotment to the experience of building one together. Maul had robbed you of such privilege it irked you. That's when you felt him tap your shoulder. You looked back at him only to be greeted by an outstretched hand- open palm- his green krystal and your orange one laid together inside.
“ I thought we could do it together” he asked unsure “ since we’re both padawan and i wouldn’t have it without you” he laid emphasis on “you”. You reached out for your kyber which he let go off easily.
“Its a pretty colour” he stated.
You hummed in agreement “ like the dust of Lok”. Obi's eyes widened a little- you had never told him your homeplanet. It wasn’t common practice in the temple- being one big family and all. Still kids from the outer rim were rarely found in the temple. If the environment didn’t get them no one would, jedi rarely went to the outer rims- out of their politics Nym used to say. The only reason Lok was known was because of the pirates.
“ I’ll gladly build my lightsaber with you, Kenobi,” you grinned at the gem. The thing would have sold for a fortune- no wonder Maul wanted it. Orange was rare, not as rare as purple or magenta, you guessed about 10 000 credits at least. You once saw a blue one sell for 8000 which was unbelievable since that could have fed you for a year and a half back then. You liked not having to worry about money anymore but the habit did persist.
“Obi wan,” he said, confusing you. “Or Obi." It's really what you prefer” he sheepishly mumbled ,scratched at the bandage near his ear.
"Both."You answered “ How's your head doing?” You questioned- must be itchy.
He collected himself quickly, taking his hand away from the bandage.
“It looked worse than it was,” he explained. “ I just needed some stitches and 2 days rest while master Y’not helped me” he pointed back to the bed under Chuang “i was right there when they brought you in. I thought you were about to die” he added more sincerely, bringing down the mood as he laid himself down on the backend of the cot.
“How do you think I felt when I found you huh” you shooted back. You didn’t want to get into the mushy stuff. You spent enough time thinking he was dead so you didn’t need to reminisce about it. A soft silence settled over the both of you.
“And yet you killed the beast,” Obi wan said proudly. A fond smile on his face.
Your heart sank straight to your stomach. Dread pouring in through the scars that littered your body.You killed him.
“What are you talking about?He's dead?”
You must have sounded quite alarmed since Obiwan shot straight up. He looked almost regretful like he wasn’t supposed to tell you. Obi wan wasn’t known for keeping secrets. He was too open and honest to lie.Whomever told him to keep it must have been desperate for you to be left in the dark.
“What did Dooku do?” You interrogated. He was sent in after you if Maul was dead it was his fault.
“Nothing nothing” he was flailing in arms again “Master Dooku only found him. He was…..frozen to death” he continued softly. You remember his frostbitten feet and seeping wet clothes- only because he jumped after you.
“ It's alright,you know. The council doesn’t think you did anything wrong” obi wan wrapped his arm around your shoulder.
How could it possibly be alright- you killed someone.-Just a kyber thief. He wasn’t a bad person, just down on his luck and you killed him for it. You had thought he might die but since you were fine you had just assumed he was as well. You weren’t a sewerrat anymore, you had an order to save you: the best bacta tanks, the most brilliant healers,medical supplies, a bed, warm clothes. What did he have?
He didn't even have shoes.
“How could they be sure it was him?” You questioned holding out hope they were wrong.
“They brought in the body yesterday.I ... .had to identify it” he seemed to understand that you were suspicious at best of that since he started choosing his words more carefully. “He had some choke marks on his neck which master Windu said happened during your fight.” He let out a long sigh.
“ You saw him?” Obi wan hadn’t mentioned anything when you found him about what had attacked him. So how could he identify his corpse?
“Well i didnt see him exactly but i saw his shadow and his profile checked out too…. That's what the council said” he was fidgeting again, pulling at the hem of his cotton pajama pants leg “ I mean you didn’t kill him exactly. He just wasn’t prepared for the climate. I didn’t mean to offend you…..I'm just happy you’re alive.” He actually did look relieved.
The thought that obi wan would have mourned you had never crossed your mind. Maybe the two of you were closer than you thought. The thought was replaced by a far more honest one. Maul was dead and who would mourn him? He hadn’t spoken of a family, maybe somewhere on Iridonia a mother waited for her son to come home.
“I wanna see his body” you heaved. Your breathing had gone irregular. You could only give him a proper death. You would go see him and beg the force to let him into the mist-beyond…
“I don't know if that's the best idea. I mean master qui gon said that-“
“I don't care what master Qui-gon says!” You cut him off. “I wanna see him” you were shaking now. Tears rapidly fall down to your lap,hands gripping your pantslegs. You weren’t even really a jedi anymore, you murdered a person. Maul never stood trial, never saw the council, never had a second chance. He was laying in the cold rooms down in the catacombs awaiting a claim from the family he never mentioned,an end only given by ignorance.
Your ruminating mind is only stopped by Obi wan pulling you into a tight hug, wrapping his arms around your back. Your nose pressed close to his shoulder leaving the familiar smell of the order’s soap to seep back into you. Soft heart berry and chinar wood reminded you of what you fought for- a safe home.You could see the damage to his head clearer from here, calming you down a little. You could convince yourself for just a second that you were protecting him.Now that you thought about it- this was the first hug the two of you had ever shared. You had unknowingly gripped onto him as well. Maybe somewhere in the cave system of Illum you had moved past their trivial differences.
“We can ask the council. They wanted to speak to you anyways, "Obi wan said, smushing your hair down.
You let go of him, moving to stand.
“Are they still in session?” You weren’t really waiting for an answer. You could always just go to your master’s quarters. It made you a little nervous. Right before leaving for Illum you had tried to go speak to him but he wasn’t there.
“They might be, I was there right before going to bed and they were still arguing when I left.”Obi wan had this strange gift of bouncing back. Even after the emotions of the last hour he was straight back to helping others, you admired that about him.
You made your way to the high council spire, one of the four spires that made the colossal that was the temple, surrounding the even taller tower in the middle. That one held the more sacred parts of the order safe. Scriptures and myths that contained the older beliefs of the jedi order before they rebuilt on Corruscant.
For as far as you remember there had been rumours floating around about the main spire having artifacts from the order of the Sith. It made sense since this temple was built on top of a Sith shrine and you weren’t allowed in when you tried to investigate the rumours- stupid temple guards. Some found it scary how close the dark side was to their beds but the 2 orders had always flowed into each other, an ancient push and pull that only ebbed away slowly like an ocean tide.
Still you could understand the edge the jedi order was on. The sith had gone all but extinct, leaving the temple to stand on its own. Many had tried to deny the need for the order all together, stating that no one should use the force in general. Some even went as far as to deny that the sith had ever existed. That's what the sith had become a faint whisper from millennia ago.
What you didn’t understand was the fear of their stuff. You could hardly fight the need to get your grubby hands all over the relics. You wanted to know about their lightsabers - How were they built? What material did they use? Why were they red in the paintings? You had never seen a red kyber nor had you noticed anyone carrying one either, maybe professor Huyang would tell you when you and Obi built your own.
Obi wan had gone silent next to you, you didn’t know when but it wasn’t awkward either. You looked down at the mosaic beneath your feet. Little red specs that showed the way to the council. Maybe the jedi who built the temple did that on purpose, a silent notion of their presence. You hoped they were still in session.
The council was made up of the best of the Jedi. They weren’t picked because of fighting ability but on how they had constructed their own understanding of the force. A path only the one jedi could follow was the essence of each and everyone on the council. Master Windu was the latest one to join. He got the opportunity after the death of grand master Katri. Both of them had a far more offensive style of living, using the force as a means to move forward in times of crisis. Both mellowed by their connections to life and its absence. You believed wholeheartedly that you could convince master Windu, the man had a reverence for proper death etiquette.
The others were the problem.
Master yaddle and master Rancisis were once master and padawan, they both carved paths of discipline and utmost peace and patience- they really loved to talk. Something you and your master were too hotheaded for. It had formed a sort of strained relationship between yaddle and Windu and Rancis just followed his master, even though Windu was far more practical- in your opinion
Master Yoda might play with the opinions of others. He was always kind of a mystery to you. You wondered sometimes if he knew that. Master Windu explained that he always picks the opportunity with the most personal growth for the other person but you disagreed with him.
He was selfish just like all jedi were in some way. The best jedi spread their selfishness thin onto many surfaces- that was something Master Dooku had told you long ago. You didn’t trust him fully anymore but a good jedi takes advice when they get it. Dooku being Yoda's padawan made him knowledgeable about the mysterious grand master.Master Yoda too held onto hope of a long ago era that was doomed to never be repeated. His masters were gone and yet he remained.
"Do you think master Qui-gon is proud of me?”
Once again he snapped you right out of your thoughts. Obi Wan didn’t look 3 years older than you right now. He was fiddling with his sleeves. Maybe you had misjudged him. He hadn’t bounced back. He had been a listening ear for you and you hadn’t repaid that favour.
“Of course he is. You got your kyber didn’t you?” It came out far harsher than you meant it. Force.
He slumped more into himself “i just- i had hoped that it would have gone better. I wanted to impress him.” He looked so defeated. His eyes were staring into the floor like it held the answers to his problem. You stopped walking, making him bump into your shoulder.
“ hey look at me “ you layed your hand on his shoulder same as he had done back in the medbay “You're his first padawan - you're going to impress him.”
You hadn't noticed his sniffing until he was finally making eye contact. Tearing a piece of the hem of the linen scrubs you continued.
“Plus he chose you himself. If you disappoint him it's his own fault” you added hoping to lighten the mood a little. It worked.
Obi wan tripped into a shy laugh “ he did pick me.” You hummed in acknowledgment while he dapped his eyes dry. You hoped the thought comforted him.
You finally turned the corner to the bottom of the pire. The hall was circular in shape having openings on four sides across from each other. Two of those let straight into the temple, the one you came out of and the one to your left. Straight ahead of you was the hanger for jedi star fighters with launch/landing platforms; the other one to your right had a dual staircase that descended and ascended since you were in the middle of the temple.
You and Obi wan shared a quick glance- you will not be using those stairs today. In the middle of the circle was a cocooned compartment that housed the elevators up to the jedi council. Since it was so late in the night, there was no one around except the 2 jedi guards around the cocoon. Their lightsabers formed a cross over the door denying you access.
“I need to see the jedi council” you wanted to sound assertive.
“No permission granted,” the taller one said. Another reason why you didn’t like the guards- they rarely spoke like humans to padawan. You were about to rebel when obi wan piped up.
“She’s Jedi master Windu’s apprentice. Her arrival was mandatory” obi wan stated firmer then expected. His eyes were no longer red nor puffy. From this angle he looked like the proud padawan of jedi master Qui gon jinn.
The shorter guard pushed a button to his left with his free hand. A low hum resounded through the cocoon being broken by a peep. The 2 guards nodded their heads and pulled their sabers back.
"Access granted” the taller one stated monotonously. You moved past them quickly. The door of the elevator opened with a woosh. Obi wan stepped in to look at the button panel, covering it up in the process.
“Do you know which one it is?” He questioned while cupping his chin.
“Yeah it's the top button since it's the top of the pire” how could he not know this?
“…..there are 2 top buttons. Do you mean the black one?” He retorted.
“No, just gold like the rest of them.” The elevators were all like that in the temple, he should know this.
“But what about this one?” he was pointing at something.
“You know I can't see the panel right?” You questioned.
“Im just going to push the button”
The elevator shook aggressively, shaking the both of you together before it sped up and shot to the top of the spire. Only to come to a halt midway and drop straight down. Both of you were slammed down to the bottom of the fast flying casket.
“WHICH BUTTON DID YOU PUSH!” you yelled at him while the elevator dipped under the guarded cocoon,whizzing past the lover levels of the temple and coming to a stop under the surface. The glass doors standing between you and a long lightly illuminated hallway. A deskish shape laid abandoned in the far horizon. Creepy.
“……the black one” obi wan mumble.
You could only stare at him in silence.
“I wouldn’t have chosen you as my padawan,” you quipped. He shoved you a little causing you to stumble against the wall of the elevator pushing the gold button down. The elevator flew back up at a gradual pace far slower than what had happened before. You let out a sigh while obi wan looked out through the window.
Silence settled into the pod only interrupted by obi wan’s sleepy ah and oh when the elevator was above the temple grounds. He had sat himself down near the glass window, legs tucked under him. You look over his head from where you were standing. The other spires were the only thing left on level. The middle one had its windows open and the lights on, shining regally on the repulsorlift pads of the jedi memorial. The way the statues were placed made them look down on you- which they probably would have done if they knew why you were heading for the council. Murder.
“Do you ever think about them?” Obi wan was looking over his shoulder. You didn’t know what he was talking about. Did he read your mind? Did he feel their burning glare like you? You wouldn’t answer him.
“The one that left the order?”he added with a desperate sigh.You saw it now. He wasn’t really looking at you but at the stairs that let out of the temple. The same once were Rand left.
“Sometimes” you answered “i dont get why anyone would leave the order tho”
The order gave a sense of safety you had never had before. You had free food and water, a bed and medical care maul didn't. You knew it was different for children from the inner and middle rim; they left their cushy homes for the temple. You couldn’t place that at all.
“Dont you think of your family? I sometimes miss my mom… I think she had a baby but I can't remember.” He had shuffled himself around. His eyes locked on the stairs longingly but from the glances you stole he seemed sullen “I miss my bed back home,” he added quietly.
You hadn’t expected any of this. He had been in the order for far longer than you had. A privilege not granted to all. You absentmindedly traced the discoloured scars near your nail beds, he had never had to claw his way out like you. He never had to barely get by; he had a warm bed at night, probably poofed up with fluffy blankets and round bouncy pillows. You could imagine an older woman with blue eyes reading him some myth before pulling the covers over him- kissing him goodnight. Of course he would miss something like that.
“I don’t remember my family at all,” you answered him honestly. If you thought of any family all that would pop up was Nym. He used to tell you about his raids four cups deep into his hooch, sitting cross legged on the ship's grub-table. Him you did miss but you weren’t going to tell Obi Wan that.No one needed to know your connection to the pirate captain.
He looked hopelessly lost but that was his own fault. There was no similarity between the two of you when it came to childhood before the temple. He had grown up easily, a quiet green planet that jedi visited often enough to pick him up, how lucky could he be.
“How could you not remember them? You were like eight when you got here.” He sounded far too confident in his conclusions. Far too accusatory for you. A hazy image of a picture Nym had shoved in your bunk crossed your mind.
“They left when I was a toddler. Why should I remember those who have abandoned me?"You were getting more and more heated. Your parents hadn’t actually left, they had gambled you away with the captain for a small ship to get off Lok but you weren’t going to be pitied by a first born from Stewjon.
“I thought Lok was a hostile planet” Obi Wan fussed more quietly. Clearly doubting your story.
“It was” you snapped back, forcing the conversation to stop. You knew you were glaring daggers at him but you couldn’t be bothered to stop. Why did Obi always need to dig around for something? You weren’t a puzzle to be solved.
Your hands had started to clench the fabric of your scrubs. Fingers weaving in with the torn edge. You looked to his hand to find the missing piece of cloth there.You cringed at the thought of standing in front of the council with tethered clothes. You promised you wouldn’t burn bridges so easily anymore.
“I'm sure your moms still thinks of you” his head snapping back in your direction “but I can't say that about mine”
There was a weighted pause that made you rethink opening up to the boy. You should have known better, he wasn’t used to your life just like you were privy to his. Somewhere you missed the equal ground you and Maul had been one.
“She must have been a stupid woman” he spat out with ugly anger that you couldn’t quite place with his usual soft demeanour. The light from the windows forming harsh lines on his pale face.The contrast made you laugh.The rest of the way was spent with obi wan pointing out places he had been on Coruscant , affirming what you already knew - Him and some of the others snuck out a lot. It was satisfying to be finally included in the loud secret.
The doors zipped open to the jedi council, making the both of you tense up again. From the shadows and voices you could make out master Windu, master Yoda and curiously master Qui-gonn as well - he wasn’t a member of the council. The rapid arm waving and stomping made it clear that they were arguing.You were intruding on something.
“I know you did all you could but my padawan is still injured” Windu bellowed through the hall. You had to quickly grab Obi wan’s arm who was rushing to defend his master. Always so loyal, always so honest. You just wanted to listen for a little longer. Scout out the field before you enter it.
“And let my own die. Is that what you ask of me?” Qui gonn sounded more desperate than angry. You didn’t appreciate the handwimpeling when it came to your injuries but you could understand his frustration.
“Both- you could have taken both back to the crucible” Windu’s rebuttal was very sound in your opinion. You nodded to which obi wan shot you a glare. Force, was he fiercely pious when it came to Qui gonn jinn- annoyingly so. You stuck your tongue out at him, mocking his devotion.
“A virtue is hindsight” Yoda's calm and quirky voice came through. Obi wan nodded his head exaggeratedly. You showed him back like he had done in the elevator but instead of a wall he stumbled straight into the open, grabbing at your arm, pulling you with him. Revealing you both to the council.
You scrambled to your feet trying to make a good impression but one look at your master's face made it clear you were too late- no one likes eavesdroppers.
“Young-padawan” he was clearly about to say youngling again but he was quick on his feet. Sometimes you wonder if you had ever even spoken to him honestly.
Your eyes swept across the room. Yoda was sitting in his chair in the middle of the cushioned circle that formed the council itself, he didn’t look to be bothered by you. You presumed his eyes were close but it was hard to see with the minimal light and maximum wrinkles he had - he looked giddy. You quickly turned to his left - Master Oppo Rancisis.
His snake-like body was wrapped over and under his chair leaving his tail to wiggle out at the bottom. Another look around and you noticed that master Yaddle wasn’t here. Oh you were in trouble. Normally you would use Yaddle to read Rancisis since you couldn’t see his face through the mop of hair he had. His beard was so long it sat in his lap and his hair was so thick and untameable that he tried to keep it up in a bun which didn’t do anything as it still spilled out all around him. You presumed he looked aggravated, strategically speaking that was safer.
The rest of the counsel weren't here. So that meant you had a 2-1 in your favour or a 3-1 when adding master Qui-gon to the mix - if his vote counted and Obi wan used his puppy eyes. He would probably feel guilty for what happened and let you do what you wanted.You were going to see Maul. You grinned at that.
“Uh-guh” master Windu cleared his throat loudly. You hadn’t responded to him at all.
“I want to see the body of the boy i murdered” you had learned from the brief conversation you had had with your master that he didn’t like people who beat around the bush. His eyes pointed past you aggravated in nature. Somewhere in your peripheral vision you could see Qui gonn jin go stiff as a log.
He had gone to help Obi wan back up on his feet. From the blurry image in your peripheral you could make out how tired obi wan looked. Or maybe he just looked at peace with his master's arm around his shoulder. Maybe his devotion was warranted- he really did act like his father.
Qui-gonn was 8 years older than Mace Windu and yet he cowered from his anger.Depa Billaba had compared your shared master to a Haarun Kal Akk dog. Not only was it a native species of his home planet but they had the same mindset. If you ran from an Akk dog they would follow you all the way home but if you stood proud and firm they would ignore you out of respect. Compared to master Windu, master Qui-gon jinn was a Coruscantie Tooka.
“ You didn’t kill anyone” he stated it so surely as if you were foolish for even thinking you had anything to do with it. As if the bite on your neck just formed on its own. The thought made it itch.
“the young zabrak died of misfortune” on that you agreed- the misfortune of meeting you. Maul could have dug around for centuries and survived on venom alone. You remember how fiercely he spat at you. Enough fire to keep him warm on the ice planet. You had to see him.
“We shouldn't be speaking about this.” Master Rancisis slithered his s’s when he spoke. Your master turned around to face him.
“And what will you have me do then grant master?” he snipped the title out “ lie to my apprentice?”
“You know better than to accuse me of deception boy” he hissed back “sometimes you have no position for honesty. A wise jedi would understand when he found himself so”
“Hit a nerve you did, master Windu” master Yoda remarked with blatant amusement. It wasn’t hard to guess why he had. Master Rancisis was solely concerned with peace even if it meant going against tradition. He had given up his family’s throne on Thisspias- a blood monarchy- for that very reason. Still you feel jaded by the man. His peace had a border - the aligned regions right before the outer rim. You knew it wasn't fair to judge the man so flippantly.
” Master Qui-gon jinn, tires your padawan looks” master Yoda was leading the room like a conductor. You rarely saw this side of the grand master. Maybe you were wrong to call him selfish, he had nothing to gain here.
"Ah,I see.” He was quick to grab obi wan’s hand “we shall be heading out then.” He was stumbling half over himself to get out of sight as quickly as possible. His unease with the council displayed clear on his face- that expression again. The one you had considered to be excitement and dread. How could you be so wrong?
Dooku hadn’t had insight into Yoda but into his own padawan. Qui-gon Jinn was selfish; you hadn’t noticed it because of his charming personality. You noticed it now. He wasn't looking at you -didn’t even glance while he was backing away.He hadn’t spoken to you either not since he had left with obi wan.He must’ve not believed you back then. If that was how an apprentice of Dooku behaved you were glad to have master Windu as your own.
“but m-“ obi wan was quick to respond. You hadn’t expected him to speak up.It wasn't like you had sworn an oath to do this together but it must have been implied to him.You shrugged at him, trying to let him know that it was fine. You knew that you didn't want him with you when you would see maul’s mangled body.
“A growing boy should get enough rest” Qui-gon continued to not look back,pulling at his arm to get the kid to move. You had to stifle a laugh at the sight of them. Force, they both looked stupid. You could hear Obi wan’s nagging all the way to the elevator. It was only when its doors closed that you were sent right back to the dire feeling in the room.
“Do you want us to tell her or do you- as her master, Mace Windu?” Rancisis spoke lowly. The kind of tone that was only accompanied by secrets. His long fingers waved from yoda to him and back again. His movements were always overly controlled. They were uncomfortably smooth without the natural bounce of human skin to them.
“I will” Windu 's voice was assertive. It was oddly comforting to have him around even if he might be lying to you. The more you got to know the masters the more you seemed to appreciate your own. You didn’t want a father like Obi wan did. You had had one of those before.- one you still remembered.
Your master sunk down to one knee in front of you. For once in your life the both of you were at eye level. He looked oh so tired from this angel. Darkened blotches were sitting right beneath his brown eyes. Brown eyes that have lost that ire they had held seconds ago. He reached his hand to your shoulder similar to qui gon and obi wan but inherently stiffer.
“Kid” , he had never called you that before “the council has decided that the death of the boy wasn’t your fault” he had said that already- he was beaten around the bush.
“So what's there to say?” The words tumbled out of your mouth in a hurried huff. You could feel the wrinkle of your brows. The sweat that dripped past them. Here you were all the way in front of the council and they still couldn’t trust you.
“In the next few days I want you to focus on healing, on building your lightsaber and moving past this obstacle” he continued as if you hadn’t interrupted him at all. As if you were a mere whisper.
“Spit it out” , your tone of voice had hardened.it slammed against the walls billowing down the council room. The feverish need to heard outwaying the rational part of your brain.
“The incident will go down as a wild beast attack” his nostrils flared but there was no anger in his expression- maybe disappointment if you knew him better. His hand had long pulled away from you. It didn’t matter.
The council was going to fabricate his death. Was that all that Maul was to them? A wild animal?
A body they could drape in pale clothes and put aside in the catacombs. The hologram would never make it to Iridonia. There would be no chance for his family to recognise the boy on the poster. If he had siblings they could better forget about him. That was the legacy you had given him. A wild animal that would be buried on the fourth night- by the order you had sworn your life to.
“I know that might anger you but-“
“Shut up!” you fired back.You knew you were throwing a tantrum but it was warranted in your opinion.
he was reaching out to you. He almost seemed desperate in his attempt but you escaped his open palm. This was no olive branch, it was a lure. A feeble attempt to control the uncontrollable. Like the falconers that would send their birds of prey out on Kiffu, Quinlan talked about. Wild beasts that had their eyes covered and route stippled out for them forced to hunt an imaginary creature for dinner scraps.
“ understand our position.” The worm spoke up again as if he held the same control as a monarch, prejudice clung on every letter. “We have zabraks amongst our ranks, we can't cause distrust because of one individual” maybe he meant Maul or maybe he was talking about you. A single individual was no rival to an order of thousands and for one second you felt as you imagined the last sith must have felt.
Cornered. An inkling to battle back. A second heartbeat.
“Master Rancisis, did we not agree that I would tell her?” Your master was offended,brows raising near his hairline. Maybe his heartbeat was the one you were hearing against the inside of your eardrums. He was standing at his full height again towering over the serpent. But you didn’t find any comfort in him right now - you glanced at Yoda. A silent plea for some sense of relief.
“Doubt the padawan has” master Yoda interfered. That was not the outcome you wanted. Were all grant masters too far gone for normal sympathy? How could he expect you to keep faith right now? How could anyone keep faith right now? Did obi wan know of this? Is that why he had said you killed a beast? Was he fine with what was happening? Was that the expectation?
“Of course I have doubts !” ” You yelled “none of you were there. I killed a living being and you're worried about the order. The one that has stood for ages while I'm in front of you pleading for a funeral that was never supposed to happen! Have you lost your mind?!”
"Do you think your freedom is priceless ,child?” stupid old snake “ of course it's not. Day and night we decided how to keep the peace. What price to pay for an entire galaxy” he sighed calming himself down, the thespian was good at that - removing himself from the situation " I will not have one child's oblivion of an ice planet rip that apart. You are naive about the fragility that sits between life and death and so was he- i envy the both of you but i can not sit here and let you frame us as ignorant fools”
"Enough.” Windu’s voiced cut though the tension like a hot knife “my apprentice will follow the orders command”
“-but” you tried to speak over him once more.
“And in return I will take her to see his body” his arms were folded over each other, shielding his body. Protecting himself from the order’s opinion. He shot you a pointed look. The The wildfire that you had let run rampant was turned to a slow kindling fire that held no bark nor bite. “ and let it be over with that”
“Yes master” you replied in a monotone. A function every padawan has, the pressure of preserving the given order pressing all life out of your voice. Deep inside you could feel a knot form. Somewhere between excitement and dread somewhat like qui gon's far away expression.
Master Rancisis had settled down again. His tail curled back over his lap revealing the glistening light green scales on the underside. A similar tea leaf coloured aura seemed to seep out of him. He was meditating.He looked so peaceful. As if the shouting match seconds ago had never happened, you envied the grand master- you knew you wouldn't find any rest tonight.
“Must take your leave, you two” yoda was sharp as always. You made quick eye contact with the man. He wore a wrinkly grin. The edges softened out by the bends of his skin. You had made up your mind about him.
Yoda was like a shepherd trying to herd an endless expanding flock he had no need to keep around. Good hearted in essence but futile in effort. Looking at him now you wondered how long he could tend to his herd. With no wolves around would he himself have to put the wounded down? Would he even be outpaced by it in the end?
Today was not that day. He was calm. Clear experience showing in the way he used his words as a crook, guiding both you and the masters to the most favourable outcome. You had gotten what you wanted and so would the council. The only one unfavourite was Maul - who had never seen the olive coloured creature in front of you.
Your master was already at the elevator when you turned to follow him. The doors were open but he was blocking the light- not entirely. The moonrays scattered around him as if his presence demanded them to bend to his will. If you would’ve been pious maybe you had found some profound insight in the matter but all you had left that belief near the middle of the council's circle. You made your way to his side.
He pushed a button wordlessly. You could see the arcade Obi Wan had spoken of on the way here. Its neon lights weren’t remarkable by any means but the slogan was - luck is on your side with the cartoonish image of a tooka holding a golden credit in its mouth. Qui gon jinn would have broken the silence with a joke about it being a sign but not your master.Only fools would believe such a thing. Luck had abandoned you back on the havoc. Nym would have broken the silence with a compliment. You could imagine it now
“You did swindle them, kid. Made a credit out of nothing” he would say in his rough voice, hands rubbing each other like a hungry fly . Less articulate than Windu but you never had to guess at his demeanour. The Feeorin never held his tongue, a trait that he was so confident in that he believed his ship did the same. “ she sings me to sleep, child i promise you that” a statement so stupid you had to stop crying to laugh at it. He wouldn't have forced you to endure his endless silence like your master. You had sunken far past the viewing of the arcade.
“You’re arrogant” Master Windu didn’t give compliments. He was still looking ahead- he was always looking ahead.
“Im sorry master” you thought this was over. Could you attack him on that?
“You’re not. You’re sorry I noticed.” There it was Mace Windu’s undiscovered secret force power- mind reading. It wasn’t handy by any means, it seemed to only work on your mind. You knew you shouldn’t joke when he was like this but you couldn’t help it.
“Did you find it funny to pull my authority into question? Did it bemuse you to question my judgment?” He wasn’t yelling but his tone was overly tactful. He wasn’t a negotiator in argument, he was a hot blooded conqueror. The bayonet was pulling blood from right between your eyes.
“No,no master.I simply meant to understand” it wasn't a full lie, more of a lie by omission. The kind of half truth one uses when cornered. A last ditch effort you use when looking into the barrel of a loaded rifle.
“Look I understand this is hard on you but you need to learn discretion. You stomp around these halls as if they don't form the path beneath your feet. You glare at the council as if they don't pave that path. You’re an over-pouring cup that keeps fighting for more. You’re arrogant”
“You already said so” you wanted to defend yourself against his accusations. Make sure that he knew you were nothing like the fool he described you to be- but you couldn’t. You could see the stairs where Rand had stood. Another person you had cruelly pushed away.
Rand who tried to bond with you about your shared childhood on Alderaan- Her boisterous tales of her shiny and loving family had caused you to snap.You yelled at her about how those stupidly perfect parents had kept her weak, how she was never going to be any good as a jedi if she held on to them. You could still see her weepy eyes if you closed your own too quickly at night. The bandage around her face was getting slowly wet by her tears. You had cut deeper than her broken nose ever could. After that she was cold to you.
She didn’t know you had never seen the planet, never smelled its flowers, never flown on a thranta.None of the memories between you two were shared.None of the jedi knew of the scheme nym and you had pulled. He would describe it as the most successful heist they had ever done. How many pirates could say they smuggled a child into the jedi order? Thinking back on it, maybe you should have never done so. Maybe that's why you were so disconnected from it all.
“…I don't know how to fix it,” you whispered to the window as it dipped under the cocoon you and Obi Wan had entered from.
Mace Windu let out a deep sigh “ it's not entirely your fault, padawan. I should have corrected you sooner. I haven’t been the best master to you” he laid hand on your shoulder again.” From now on I promise you I won't let you do it all alone. Two cups can carry more than one”
One thing you could respect your master for was the reserved respect he kept. You let his hand rest this time.
“I do respect you,master,” you stated. You couldn’t promise to never question him again nor to never lie again but you wanted him to know where he stood just like he had let you.
“ I know” was all he uttered. The rest of the ride was spent in another silence. Not a soft one you had shared with Obi wan or the loaded one that oozed when Maul had pulled you out, just the absence of sound. Only created by two people who could never show their full hand. Gambling was in your blood.
The elevator hit the ground with a jagged tut. You were back in the eery hallway from before the meeting. Mace Windu opened his hand letting the force leap into the tunnel. The glass doors that had protected you last time whizzed open, letting the frigid air seep in. You knew the catacombs were below the temple but you didn’t know how close death laid to your bed. It took more conviction than planned to leave the safety of the golden elevator.
Maul's final resting place was cold and humid, carved deep into the freezing core of Coruscant. You followed your master up to the presumed desk you had seen before. You hadn’t been wrong. Black augite shot up from the floor, being shaped into the desk that stood before a full wall of basalt. Your master looked down on the plateaud rock revealing smaller settlements of other minerals. You could recognise the olive green of olivine and the cream pink of orthoclasse amongst them. Your master pressed down on a dark purple kunzite that sung at the touch.
The giant wall moved to the left, rolling onto a track that kept it circling the room. A ramp at the right side of the door made the stone jump over the entrance, missing the both of you when you walked through it. The same kunzite purple made its way onto the walls and floor, curving over every bump they met on the way.
“We don't have all night padawan”
Your master started picking up the pace as he followed the glowing spodumine trail closely. The further you went the darker it got. You could hear the soft triple of water nearby as your eyes were slowly adjusting to the dark. You came to a halt at a giant hole that went even further down- you could see the bottom. Rays of red and purple light came spilling out it , shining upwards in ribbons before your eyes. You went to touch the dancing stars when your master stopped you.
“Don’t even think of it” he had your wrist in his hand “ the ancient shrine still tries to beacon new force sensitives”
You couldn’t believe it- the old sith shrine was still active. You knew that the force had a will of its own but to see it in action like this was nerve wrecking. The force wasn’t just good -it was alive. You glanced back down trying to get a glimpse of it- no luck.
“Where are we, master?” The ribbons are still curling in the air,coming as close to you as they seem to be able. It was pulling you in without touch, wrapped around you like a cold blanket.
“Two hundred meters above the shrine and twenty meters under the temple. Do not worry padawan We’re closer to good than evil” he didn’t seem to mind any of this, pulling you with him as he followed the kunzite.
“Why would you keep the dead here?” You question. Sure it was beautiful but who cared about the flowers on a grave if the soil was rotten.
“All beings in the world are connected to the force yet only the jedi and sith connect to her as an equal” he looked back over his shoulder, prompting you to ask more questions.
“I thought the sith corrupted the force..” you felt stupid in how little you knew of the history of it all. You felt stupid at the racing of your heart. The beat was so quick and unruly that it still felt like multiple. Maybe it was just your imagination but you could swear it felt different then normal. Silent discomfort- just like the room you found yourself in.
“You can only corrupt an equal.” You nodded along trying to understand his logic. Corruption was widespread in the galaxy, from the Hutt with their Twi’leks to the slaves in the spice mines of Kessel. How could they be seen as counterweights when it was so clear that it wasn't fair .You didn't see them as equal. Any slaver would never stand as equal to you.
“When a person loses their life and we can collect them we bring them here- the highest collection of natural occurring mithoclorians we have found- both sith and jedi have worshiped them. The closest a non force sensitive can come to the mist beyond. An equal ground” he continued.
Mace Windu's reverence was clear in voice. Your master was well educated on both sides of the force but you had never been let in like this. Maybe he hadn’t lied, maybe you would truly be like his acolyte moving forward. You just had one more question.
“Why do siths have red lightsabers?” Your question had caused him to halt “…. I saw them in the paintings. We don't have them.”
“They bleed their crystals. Force them to bend to their anger” your master stated firmly sending a chill down your spine. You scrambled for your kyber in your pocket, fearing that you wouldn’t see the amber hue again. You had it with you during the council meeting. Nervous hands fumbled to reveal the crystal. It sung to life with the mitoclorians floating about, vibrant and orange.
Your master's booming laughter hit your ears.
“Believe me padawan it would take far more anger and far more energy to get it to bleed. A sith apprentice spent years pouring their anger into one- it said to be quite painful. To do so by accident would make for quite a surprise" he turned back around wiping at his face. You had brought him to tears.It was the first time you had seen him laugh- and because of your stupidity. You quickly tucked the rock back into your pocket.
The kunzite hissed and circled above a large rock formation at the end of the hall your master had stepped into. He walked over to the basalt and moved his hands in a soft tilt. The kunzite fell from the ceiling down onto the rock, simmering and bubbling on the surface.
“Look close." The sizzling revealed a scripture you couldn’t quite read. “It's fascinating isn't it?”
You shook your head "I can't read it, what does it say master?”
“Thats the interesting part. Ancient sith- Ur-Kittât. None of us know what it says ... .we lost more than just members when the two split” he swiped his fingers over the text and the formation split in two. Equal halves fell heavy to the floor as the room fell into darkness with them. You looked to the center ,revealing a high table in the middle with on it a body- Maul.
You could only make out his horns in the dark. Stepping closer you tried to grab onto his hand when your master pulled you back.
“Wait”
The word had barely passed his lips when blinding fire erupted from the sides of the basalt altar. They flung up to the ceiling,hiding him behind themselves.
“We can still turn back if you want to” you hadn’t noticed that you were holding onto his robe. You shook your head. “I need to see him,” your master let out a sigh. The fire lowered itself and seemed to jump to the nearby spires you hadn’t noticed before.
You let go of your master, stepped closer to look at Maul's face. You faintly wondered if that aggravated scowl would still be formed on his face. You locked eyes with him. Your blood ran cold, 2 heart beats long forgotten.
It wasn't him.
The boy before you wasn't crimson nor was he so angry looking. He was a soft shade of yellow almost beige with even lighter eggshell coloured lines scattered across his face. There was no bite mark near his neck, only an angry red chookmark- done by hand. His eyes were blue- fully blue, no fire burning around his pupils. You didn't know who this was but it wasn't Maul.
“I understand this might be difficult for you but-“
“It isn't him” you moved your hand to his forehead. He missed a horn near his temple- it seemed to be broken off. The jagged stub still was far higher than mauls. All of them were curved inwards only to point outwards at the tips.“ I don't know who this is” you let your hand fall to his - no claws just soft cold skin.
He was dressed in traditional burial clothes all white and wool- you hoped he wouldn’t be burned like jedi normally were. You should have asked your master instead of the lightsabers, guilt crawled its way back to you. He was standing behind you once again. There were no two cups to be filled, it fell all on you once more.
“Dooku brought him in?” You were trying to be precise with your words. You hoped Windu wouldn’t pick up on your growing distrust in the man.
“He did.” You knew this strategy of his. He would let you walk yourself straight into a trap.
“How long did it take?” How long would it take to replace a person?
“The search took 2 days. He was found by Master Dooku and the scouts. I don’t know what you are trying to imply but drop it.” His voice dropped lower at the end.
“I am the only one who saw him” you gestured at the boy next to you “ this is not the person i fought”
“You were losing blood at a rapid rate, you were half drowned - you don’t remember” he raised his voice.
“Well he didn’t look like this. He was crimson coloured with blue angry eyes and i saw him before i lost blood- i hunted him myself” you matched his tone. The fire around the coffin roared up again, hitting your outstretched hand. You pulled it back with a hiss. The basalt started to close itself off .Fire and kunzite dancing its way back to the ceiling, concealing the unknown zabrak once again.
Master Windu janked you by your other arm, leaning in to inspect the slight burn.
“How you continue to avoid any growth is a mystery to me. Have you not listened? Have you never learned? I want you to dispose of this needless anger, this waste of your energy. I want you to become the jedi I saw the day Depa Billaba showed me your ambition. Why do you let your frustration lead you when I am right here to do so?” He pulled out a tiny container of bacta and rubbed it on the burn.
You could answer him once more “…i didn't know you had that with you” you tried to avoid his questioning. He gave you a knowing look “ I started a week ago” he answered quieter. You yawned involuntarily, tired of the constant rollercoaster.
“I think it's time for bed” you shook your head in response wanting to come to an understanding tonight.
"It's not always preferable to rush into and out of all things, padawan” he raised his hands back to the kunzite causing it to spill back into the hall “ let that be your first step towards growth” you let him lead you back to the elevator.
You didn’t say a word until you were in front of the padawan sleeping hall.
“Msster” he had already turned away from you but paused “ do you still think i can become a good jedi?” His face contorted to a far kinder facade than before.
“I do believe so. You have no blood on your hands” with that he let you walk into your room.
The room wasn't big. It had your shared bunk beds on the left with two desks on the other side of the room in the middle was a round window that showed the temple's garden. Other than that there was nothing to see, you hadn’t settled down yet. You didn’t even know which of the bunks you would sleep in tonight. New padawan dorms -how nice.
You didn't turn the light on but the sound of the sliding door must have woken obi up. He sat on the bottom bunk- nice you would sleep up high tonight.
“You’re back” he slurred a little “ how did it go?”
“His blood is not on my hands” you repeated. Making your way to climb up to your bed, flopping down on it.
“I told you so didn't I" he quipped. You could hear some shuffling below you “ these blankets are way thicker than the ones in the younglings dormitory” he added sleepy.
In a few minutes he was fast asleep, leaving you to listen to his snores. You couldn’t find sleep, not between the relief of Maul maybe being alive and the dread of the body in the basement.
———-xxxx————
So hey…… i know this chapter is super long but i couldn’t find the right moment to cut it into 2 so yeah. Next chapter will start with a timeskip of about 2 years :) i hope you enjoyed this story so far <3
This series follows reader and maul from when they were both padawa/aprentice to ( as far as i have planned) the end of revenge of the sith.its slowburn. Prt1. >>>Prt3
Summary: ❥ reader is drowning.
Read on ao3
Masterlist
Words: ❥ 5k+
Tw: ❥ i dont think there are any maybe angst𖧷
———-xxxx————
You never liked lakes, never liked swimming either. It wasn’t necessary on a city planet like Coruscant and who would have thought you on Lok. How strange it was to think of that dust ball in your dying moments. Maybe Nym would be proud of you now- you died fighting for what you wanted. He wouldn’t have agreed with the blood you shed but he was a hypocrite like that. You would never forget how he fought on smuggler's moon nor that he took you there. Guess you didn’t have to remember for long anymore.
The ice floes were meters above you now.only blue surrounded you. As below, above and beyond-you imagine.The zabrak would surely die of his wounds, you've seen bigger men die of less. He would follow you in death, track your scent all the way to the mist-beyond both to never return. He was sensitive like that- force sensitive you reckon. His reflexes were too fast to be mere luck. He could have been your sparring partner like obi wan and rank. Maybe you spar in death. Force only knows what's ahead. You tried to take peace in that. Water was filling your lungs slowly washing away his blood from your teeth.
You didn’t know what it meant to die.Obi wan would have to do it alone. Your master would take a new padawan and your temple bed would be given to the next kid dropped off. Maybe years in the future they would tell their padawn to be careful since a padawn died on the quiet and safe Illum, how they fought an imaginary enemy. How they fought out of anger instead of inner peace, how they died crawling.You spared a quick glance downward- you wouldn’t be found.
You couldn’t die like this. Fear flooded your system. You tried to gasp for air out of habit.You flailed your arms around. You’ve seen Kit Fisto swim, it couldn't be so hard. You tried to kick your legs like he did. Your left leg wasn’t moving like you wanted but you had 3 limbs left. Aimless circular movements tried to bring you back up to the surface. Exhaustion drags you back down. Your neck started hurting.
Panic started to seep in. You were going to die. If the force was real it needed to show you now. A sign that it wanted you to live, that it wanted you as a student. That there was a destiny waiting for you.something to hold on to. You just hoped something would give, something would care for you like it was promised.
The surface broke open. Red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to you. Coming down in a strong unrelenting movement. Relief dulled your senses, it made you stop fighting the ice lake. Red wrapped around you, pulling you back to the surface.you gasped loudly ,breath heaving .It Scrambled to get the water out of your lungs, pressing down until you spit out the last of death's grip. You finally caught your breath. You looked up.
There he sat, the zabrak. Your enemy. Hesitant.
You both made eye contact. He looked weaker now, drained from the fight . Water was seeping from his robes. His bare feet looked to be frostbitting. He was cold. You were both cold but he could have avoided the ice water. You almost couldn’t believe it. He had pulled you out. Why didn’t matter to you right now. You survived. You couldn’t help but crack a smile.
“Maul,” he mumbled. Stretching out his claw.
You had over thought it. He pulled you out just to kill you himself- why would he go through the trouble. You could feel your face hardened again. You tried to sit back up, get ready for the inevitable. No matter how you tried your body wouldn’t move how you wanted it too. You were exhausted. Leg already mauled, there was no way for you to win.
“ just get on with it” you rasped out at him "rip me apart. Get your revenge.”
He looked confused then aggravated, maybe a little hurt . You didn’t know him well enough to say for certain “ it's my name” he snapped back, his outstretched arm flying back to his side like he regretted getting you out. You had offended him.
You should have known. Zabrak naming conventions were taught together with other species and their conventions in the temple to help communication between the jedi. You scored high in those classes and now you fumbled them -then again you weren’t expecting an introduction. He did try to kill you -multiple times. You decided to give him only your first name since you tried to kill him too. Which he seemed to appreciate.
A loaded silence settled. You took your time observing him. He was a lot like the wild loth cats who would stay in the garden. Arrogant and proud yet skiddisch in nature. He folded his legs over each other taking a more proper position then his hunched one before. He avoided eye contact but was keeping you in sight. He twisted around to look back at where he had attacked you in the first place. The light that had guided you there was gone now. Night has fallen. You huffed in annoyance, the ice door was surely frozen over. You had to reach out somehow.
He turned back around, the horn on the back of his head was chipped- was it stuck in your hand you pondered . He looked at you now, squinting his eyes trying to understand what you were doing. You tried to breathe in and out, following a rhythm. If you could reach out to Qui Gon or Obi Wan, you wouldn't trust Dooku anymore. His staring didn’t help but you locked on to a force signature. You didn’t recognise it but then again you didn’t sense Obi Wan or his master in the area. They probably went back to get him first aid,maybe they had sent a replacement for them. You tried to connect to it anyway.
Maul hissed again, you cracked an eye open to glance at him. He looked flustered. You realised your mistake a little too late. He glared at you. You sat up quickly, reaching your hand out “ sorry” you mumbled. You knew how weird it felt the first time it happened to you. It was invasive in nature but could be soft and comforting in practice. In the crèche,they used it to rock and sooth the new padawan. Later you figure out how to send emotions through them but he wasn't a padawan.Yet.
He was force sensitive and a good fighter.You could take him back to the temple. He could be somewhat of a friend. There was an uncertainty in his character that made him mean but so did you. You didn’t know why he was here and that was central to if he was Jedi material. You didn’t really know what that meant but Nym had his questions when talking to other pirates. Maybe those would do well enough. You had to be subtle about it , to not scare him. He was scared easily. He looked horrified when you bit him- maybe that was normal. Blood was still pouring out of your leg.
“ So ... .you sell kyber?” That might have gone better if you weren’t bleeding out.
His eyes widened in recognition, he was back to being collected. “ I do,” he exhaled.
“And you repay your debts?” You asked more assuredly now. You knew smugglers and thieves, they were easy enough to read. Less complicated than the noble padawan. Loyal to themselves only.
You couldn’t fathom why you had been so scared of him. He looked like a fish out of water, caught on dry land. Maybe he was new to this. Beginning with kyber was quite ambitious but ambitious was a good attribute to have -certainly if he was going to keep up with you.
“I let you breathe, you let me breathe” you clarified.
“ I didn’t do that for you” he puffed out. Eyes furrowed in frustration.
“ Did you feel guilty, Maul?” You asked, smug. You knew his kind. Thieves who didn’t have it in them to kill. Guilt and pity were strong replacements for honour. You felt pity for him yourself when he was clawing at his throat. You saw yourself as a thief as well. You stole your spot in the jedi from a good honest child.
“Dont use my name so freely, padawan” he scoffed back. It didn’t surprise you that he knew of your status. He wasn’t stupid, his battle IQ was up there with quinlan and you had shown your force signature to him. He was just so easy to rile up.
“ You shouldn’t hand it out so freely if you don't want it to be used,” you stared at him. His eyes were weird. They were blueish only broken around the irises by a hint of yellow. He looked away. Bringing his knee up to his chin.
“We could head back together .You could become a padawn like me. You are force sensitive, you’re not horrible in combat” Recognition hit him first and was quickly replaced with anger.
“ why would I want to be anything like you?” He stood up, leaving your eye level.
“You could get your own kyber ... .sell it if you want” you were quizzled by his outburst “ it's not like you're stuck forever you know. You could try it out” for a thief he wasn't very opportunistic.you wanted him to just relent you didn’t know why but it would give you some peace. Maybe it would make your guilt lessen.Your head started aching.
“I don't want anything to do with you” he cursed out looking down at you. “ they wouldn’t understand”
His arms folded around himself. He was conflicted so much was clear. He turned around, stumbling to leave as quick as he came. He was slowed a little by his left leg dragging.
“If you’re worried about the fight they will understand. I’ll explain it to them, I promise!” You yelled after him. You tried to get up but you tumbled back down again.
“ I don't need you,” he yelled back. It echoed back against the walls.
“Well you can explain it yourself if you like just come with me” you bellowed back “ we don't even need to be friends!” he stopped for a second. Looking back one last time before sprinting away. You winched at how he pulled his bleeding leg with him.he was out of sight now. You could hear his footsteps but he never replied. He wasn’t coming back.
You were abandoned once again. You laid back down, sprawling your arms and legs out -star style. You let the relief of not being murdered roll through you. Him leaving finally gave you some time to think. It was weird how nervous he made you. Not the normal amount of nervousness a murderer should bring more of an unsettling gnawing feeling that set itself deep in your gut- he was too much like you.
His arrogant and belittling attitude was not unlike how you treated Obi Wan and the others - no wonder they never liked you. Yet you wanted him by your side, not in a friendly way, more of a bird of a feather. Two birds of prey forced to play guard dogs for sheep. It would bring you great comfort to not be the only one with talons anymore, talons that made the others fear for their fur. You could share the brunt of their howls together.Instead of being alone amongst the hounds. You couldn’t blame him for his choices either- not entirely.In another life you had been the kyber thief -you would have left him here too.
That reminded you- you needed your kyber crystal. Looking for it didn’t seem to work - nor were you capable right now. Obi wan had gotten his but he was always always calm and collected, so hopeful, so palatable to most. So was his kyber, blue, a colour that eased people. Made them think of the sky back home - not Lok which was so densely populated by dust that the blue would show more purple.
Purple your master’s colour. A colour so rare that only he had it. You had hoped to join him. Shine bright like him. You knew now that you had been naive; you didn’t fit the type to get a purple lightsaber. You were too angry, too impatient and temperamental. Purple would soften you out like it did for him. He looked softer when his blade was drawn. An oxymoron only he could master.
Master Windu was far more reserved than most teachers. He held himself poised and proud, due to the strict way he followed the order. That was what he wanted from his padawan as well- perfection. It wasn’t impossible , your master’s previous padawan Depa Billaba was perfect .
You loved jedi knight Depa Billaba, she always took time out of her day to come and talk to you when you were back in the crèche. You were a lonely child hardened by life before 10. It didn’t leave much room for socialising. You were too busy mourning your previous life to accept this one so easily. She would sit with you in silence until you felt comfortable enough to start talking. She turned Jedi Knight right before you could be a padawan.
Just like Dooku, she was your first choice. An older sister to guide you through your life. But in the end she wasn't ready for a padawan yet -not even you. She recommended you to her master without your knowledge- you only found this out when you met him. A comment he threw out right alongside his expectations for you. You wanted to be perfect too. You needed that to happen to be the best.
You worked relentlessly in the training halls until your bones ached or until the battle bots broke. You avoided sleep by reading proper instructions for new lightsabers styles. Training with sticks to impersonate the plasma blades. If you didn’t read about that you read about history and culture, to make sure you would never fail at communicating. Good jedi drew their sabers last. You stayed late in mechanics to bleed your teachers for information. You had to keep at it until you were perfect.
No you were lying to yourself- you needed that to happen so that you felt worthy. The envious glances from other padawan kept you going,how they would squirm when you rejected their shaking hands. The way their lips would quiver when you bested them made you smile. Those good sheep falling in line after a sewer rat from the outer rim . You knew it ate at them at night. You wondered now if they ever thought of you like that- they probably didn’t. You had burned every olive branch ever handed to you by your fellow padawn- just like Maul had done.
Your anxious heart ached. You needed a rest. The ice on your back was melting beneath you, slowly. You focused on the cold shill running through your chest. You could give it a shot. You breathed in and out steadily, closing your eyes. The rustling of air flowing through the cave mixed together with your heart beat in your ears. Meditating on these emotions until they dissipate.
Over thinking, over analyzing separating the body from the mind.
Emotion, yet peace
Ignorance, yet knowledge
Passion, yet serenity
Chaos, yet harmony
Death, yet the force
You were pulled from your makeshift meditation by soft humming in the air, it sounded like Nym when he was thinkering at his desk in the captain’s quarters. You opened your eyes to see an orange hue fill the space next to your head. The dust of Lok had followed you all the way to this cave and you couldn’t be happier about it. You turned over crawling on your arms to bring yourself closer. A shining amber crystal close to Obi Wan's hair. the complete opposite of your masters -so close to the havoc. You reached your hand out to it. You were half expecting it to be warm by the glow alone but it wasn't. Cool and rigid.
You held it closer, inspecting the grooves and edges. Close by, its light shone shimmers all over the broken lake. If Maul saw it, he didn’t seem to care. You let it calm and warm you. The blood loss mixed with the excitement made your head feel dizzy. You laid back down clutching the gem close
Night had fallen a few hours ago. The ice gate was frozen over, you were stuck for 19 days - you were planning to sleep for at least 5 of them. Your fingers mindlessly pawing at the kyber, you achieved what you wanted. You could finally rest.
-+꧁ ꧂+-
Master Windu had found the time to go to Illum. Well he had not found the time - he had made it. Partly with the help of Depa, his padawan - ex padawan. She had insisted that he should be there for his new padawan which he had wimpled off. He had paperwork to do. He couldn’t neglect his negotiating duties just because the council had assigned him a new padawan.
He hadn’t had his seat at the council for long- 5 years to be exact. Which was nothing compared to the other grant masters. He wasn’t established enough to walk away so easily, something his student didn’t seem to understand. He had trained Depa during his jedi knight years. A period of time that was definite by its lack of expectations. Jedi knights were an integral part of peacekeeping but they couldn’t bring the balance in danger like he could now. Every vote mattered, every conversation was a mixture of patience and intent that would reflect upon every person in the temple. If he failed, so did the order.
Yet he couldn’t deny his pleading padawan. He became a master when she became a knight. Both connected through shared changes. He looked to Depa as his daughter. She had that same furrowed brown back on Chalacta. She carried herself with such dignity and integrity. His new padawan was the opposite. Something he was sure the council decided knowingly - he had to let Depa go.
The nose of his ship breaks through the atmosphere of the ice planet. He was a day late. His padawan would surely have her kyber by now- Depa had it in 2 hours. Yet again his new padawan was sloppy. Her meditation lacked focus and her signature recognition was subpar at best. She was not horrible in combat and her practical knowledge was top notch but none of that counted for the kyber trial. One full day should be enough by far.
He flew closer to the mouth of the cave when he noticed that their transport ship was active, purple lights of the Crucible shining lavender across the snow. The Crucible was meant for the kyber ceremony but wasn't meant to be left with the engine on. It was enforced not too long ago. New escape pods and medbays were installed together with more materials for the sabers. One of those was missing now from what he could see from the outside. He landed right next to it.
He checked the outside of the ship on foot, if this was a trap it would not be sprung. The only thing out of place was one of the new pods with a Bactatank on board. Someone was wounded. He went for the entrance, activating his saber. Only the humming of the engine could be heard. No Qui gon No Dooku, not the sounds of the 2 rambunctious padawan. When he entered the main room of the ship he could hear faint movement in the storage room, the old clicking of metal touching wood and flint. He deactivated his lightsaber. There was only one person working on board of the Crucible.
“ professor Huyang” he opened.
The droid turned around to face him “ mace, did the council send you?” . Huyang was one of the few people who got to call him Mace, having taught the boy himself how to build his lightsaber. All those years ago he had looked up at the droid in annoyance - they were at eyelevel now.
“ The Jedi didn’t send me. I'm here for my padawan” Huyang headlights when blank for a second. Something was off.
“ Is the gathering still happening, professor?” He asked. It shouldn’t be but then again a pod was missing and the kid was nowhere to be seen.
“ Yes, Dooku is with your padawan. Qui-Gon has taken the emergency pod home together with his padawan.” Windu raised an eyebrow at this.
“ Obi Wan Kenobi was wounded after an…altercation” the droid continued “He will make his lightsaber on Coruscant when we get back ” he was fiddling with a bowl-fitted hilt.
“ my padawan has retrieved her kyber then i presume” he turned away from the droid.
“ I have no idea ,mace. Dooku has not returned nor has he let me know anything” he craned his head across his shoulder while putting the hilt back in its place.
“ Well we all know how eccentric Dooku likes to be. He’s probably just boring the youngling with one of his unconventional ideas .” He opened the door to the Crucible, pausing. “ about the altercation, did my padawan have anything to do with it?” He questioned.
“Not that I know of. Qui Gon said he fell” he wasn’t lying, Huyang could change the truth a little but he couldn’t lie. He wasn’t programmed for it. Sometimes Windu wondered if this change is what separates droids from humans.
“ Fine, then I will find out for myself,” Windu quipped, taking his leave.
“ Wait, take these with you Mace. Just in case they are needed” the professor handed him a set of one stim canister and bacta patches in different sizes. He took them with a nod.
He trusted Qui-Gon as a friend and a Jedi master but he didn’t trust the altruistic nature of his beliefs. He couldn’t or wouldn’t understand the childish mistakes of padawan. He used the lavender shine to find his way to the cave. When he reached the entrance, he let his fingers run across the side of the ice wall. He wouldn’t let nostalgia dull his senses.
No noises echoed across the cave. He looked into the main corridor to see Dooku but no padawan. He glanced at the ice gate to find it frozen over. She was late, disappointment had left his voice more peeved then needed.
“ Jedi master Dooku, what happened?”
Dooku jumped slightly, he wasn’t expecting him. He looked to be meditating when windu entered but now he stood up straight. His right hand shot up to his curve hilt but halted when they locked eyes. There was blood near his sleeve. Probably Obi Wans- hopefully Obi Wans.
“Your padawan attacked Obi Wan” he stated it so clearly. As little as windu knew of his padawan- she wouldn’t attack one of her own. From what he had heard from Huyang, he had his kyber. If there was nothing to gain, his padawan would only strive for perfection- that's what he had instilled in her.
“ And how do you know this, Dooku?” He didn’t trust him one bit. Not after what happened last year on Raxus Secundus. He hadn’t let the others know, it was fully personal when it came to Dooku. His insistence in the unproven unpredictable expect of the force only brought danger upon all Windu stood for. No wonder his pawadan liked him - he hoped she saw her mistake now. And besides, Dooku didn’t trust him either after he got the seat on the council. Jealousy has no place in the order.
“Your apprentice is arrogant, she couldn’t handle that Obi Wan bested her” he guffawed full of assumption “ I sent her back to retrieve her own. Let her cool down.” He continued “ she even tried to make up a violent creature to cover up her tracks. Her need for perfection is maddening” he laid emphasis on that last part, eying Windu knowingly.
“A creature attacked you say” he was too proud to take a slight so easily - even if it was through his foolish padawan. He readied his saber, plunging it into the frozen wall. Master Yoda wouldn’t have agreed with this approach to go get his apprentice “ she could be wounded” he yelled back forming his excuse.
He trailed her signature through the ice tunnels taking note of his surroundings: a death end, some blood here and there - kenobis probably and one singular missing chain near a minecart. The metal linked sequence being pulled straight out of the wall. From the exit hole it left in the ice it was clear that whoever had done it had certainly put their back into it - he didn’t have to think long of who would have done that. Another sign left him.
He moved quicker through the caverns. Until he heard the faint sloshing of water. He ran further saber in hand. Something had broken the lake wide open. He slowed down when he saw the ice floes. He scanned the area until he spotted it . A soaked bloody mess near the side of the lake. Only recognisable by the pale robes she had left with back on corruscant.
His padawan hadn’t lied. There was a monster and she had fought it.
He rushed to her side, taking out the bacta patches he had gotten from the professor. Now that he was so close to her, he could assess her wounds. She was knocked out clutching a cashing hand to her chest. The way her neck was turned made the bite on her neck stand out more than it already did. He injected the stim in it, causing the skin and muscle to contract inwards closing the wound. Her leg had bled straight through her pants, running into her socks. He ripped it where the blood started, slapping one of the bigger patches over it.
He finally settled his attention to her hand, softly trying to unwrap it so he could bandage it. When she stirred, snatching her hand back.
“ mine” she mumbled as if she could defend herself. With the way she rolled to her side,her hand loosened just enough to let the orange light shine through.
He tried once more to grab her hand while hoping to keep her lucid until they were back to the ship.
“You got your kyber” It came out a little more questioning than he had meant. He hadn’t thought she could have after seeing her lying there.
“Got it,” she slurred, opening her hand in front of her proudly. Straight fire coursed out of her palm. Untempered and dangerous. His hand twitched. Why was he anticipating an attack?
He quickly took the gem from her, dosing the flame in his bacta bag. “Wouldn’t want you to drop it” he replied coily
She finally let him bandage her hand.” Came back huh?” She quipped in full pride. She wasn’t wrong, he should've been here, he should've been able to keep the child safe. That's all he could think of when he picked her up, carrying her by her arms and legs in front of him. Her head was falling back.
“And do you remember what happened, youngling?” He questioned, hoping to keep her lucid
“Not a youngling” she grumbled.
He couldn’t help but form a slight smile at that. Even after all she had been through , she had still found the energy to be far too strongheaded. Proud and entitled like the day he had met her.
“Kyber thief” she stumbled across shallow breaths “probably death by now” she hesitated for a second “ i bit him in the neck” she stated quietly.
He hummed in acknowledgment. The blood loss must be getting to her. She must be misremembering things, the protruding flesh was still staring at him. A bite so nasty the stim hadn’t been able to close it fully. He would question her further with the council later after she was healed.
He crossed the lake slowly making sure not to shake her too much. She looked over to the other side of it.
“He ran away towards there” she shook her head softly towards the other side. Moonlight pooled in. He hadn’t had the time to assess that earlier and he didn’t once again.
“We will send a scout later” he assured her
“Hes force sensitive” she stated urging Windu on.
“And so are you,” he reprimanded . Always so quick to forget her own worth. It aggravated him.
She went quiet until they were back at the old mining shaft.
“I choked him too,” she said softly. Once again the deep purple marks across her neck told a different story. It didn’t matter anyways. A violent animal should be put down.
By the time they reached the main cavern, she had fallen asleep. Dooku was standing near the entrance. He opened his mouth to speak but was quickly cut off by the sight before him.
“She didn’t lie….” He uttered. Windu didn’t have to guess what he was thinking- he had thought the same. Still anger flared up. How long had she been laying there while he sat meditating? How long did he ignore her for his own flooty beliefs?
“ I can tell” he stated, handing his ship's keys over.
“You will look into what hunted them” he spoke steadily. Dooku scowled at him, he was twice his senior after all.
“Thats an order from the council”
He didn’t look back to face the furry from the elder. His padawan needed the bacta tanks back on the Crucible. He pulled out his hologram, connecting to the ship.
“Professor Huyang, my padawan is in critical state. We will leave on arrival. Prepare the second pod's bacta tank.” He closed the call, trusting the professor to fill in what else was needed. He glanced back. Both his keys and Dooku were missing. He left the cave behind with that.
The Crucibles lights were pointed to the front now, ready for take off. He entered the ship and walked straight to the pod. Professor Huyang was already waiting there with all the equipment needed.
“Mace, you should get ahead and take off. I will heal the youngling”
“Not a youngling” Windu corrected, laying the girl down next to the tank. The professor let out a metallic chuckle.
“You’re not going to ask about Jedi master Dooku?” He questioned.
“We all know how eccentric he can be. Besides, Jedi business are none of mine” the bot replied, prepping the padawn for the bacta tank.
Windu nodded at that and left for the cockpit. He let out a sigh once he sat down. She would have 7 days to heal by then she should remember what happened. He boosted up the engine, pulled in the ship's stands and started the way home. Once they were safe in space, he called back home.
———-xxxx————
Hey hey
So…… new maul lore dropped in the last episode of the darth maul show. I have most of this planned out which means that I have parted from the canon lore by accident. Maul is the same age as the reader in this fic meaning that he's 11 here since I did follow the thought that he was far younger when palpetino took him.So yeah I'm probably not going to follow the new show. I just wanted to let you guys know.
Also happy may 4th to all may the fourth be with you :)
This series follows reader and maul from when they were both padawa/aprentice to ( as far as i have planned) the end of revenge of the sith.its slowburn. Prt2 prt3
Summary: ❥ Obi wan and reader are going to Ilum for the gathering. There chances on kyber get slimmer and slimmer when a long forgotten enemy approaches.
Read on ao3
Words: ❥ 4,5k+
Tw: ❥ its mainly set up and angst follks 𖧷
Masterlist
Ilum was cold but it didn’t matter to you. Becoming a jedi knight had its challenges and the cold was not one of them. You were walking behind Jedi Master Qui- Gon Jinn , across the icy plains. He was clutching his robe closely around him. The ship had landed further away from the mouth of the cave than normal. Which may be why master Qui-Gon wore that foreign expression again, somewhere between excitement and dread. You had decided ages ago that you rather go with the former then the later. Sure he had only just become a jedi master but he wouldn’t fall to fear so easily not on a day like today.
You shot a quick look at Obi Wan on your left, his hands were shaking but his eyes were straight ahead. Obi had all the reasons to be shaking. He had finally become a padawan at the age of 13, which was rather late as you were 11. His new jedi master walked in front of him. Your own was probably back in the temple; he had assured you that you would be fine and insisted that he had a meeting to attend to. It was abnormal for there to be only 2 for the gathering. You were originally with 3 but Rand had run off to go save her father. You only knew about it because Obi had tried to stop her . Another reason for his shaking.
When he had told you so, you couldn’t help but be a little wounded. Neither of them had come for you, a faint separation that had followed you since you had gotten to the temple. Yes you were a little older when you got there but you worked hard, even Rand had told you herself that she would trust you with her life. A compliment gained after a sparring session that had left you and her with matching bruises. You had always hated liars - disliked liars, hate wasn't becoming of a jedi.
You entered the kyber cristal cave. Qui Gon’s voice echoing against the curved walls. He was going over the rules and traditions of the gathering, which you knew by heart by now. When you got to the main corridor, you saw another jedi master, master Dooku. It was rather common for a higher rank jedi to be at the gathering but that was normally yoda - You didn’t mind it one bit. Yoda was a great jedi, probably the best but you didn't know him very well. He helped you grow just like any other youngling but master Dooku had brought you to the temple himself. You had hoped that he would have taken you as his padawan. That didn’t happen of course but the reverence you held for the jedi still remained.
Before any of you could get a word out he opened a shutter and shifted a metal structure at the top of the cave, sending a ray of light to the iced gate at the end of the corridor where the massive ice covered gateway started to slowly melt. Once the ice had fully melted, you were going to get your kyber cristal. You spared one last look at Obi wan - who had finally stopped shaking. He appeared surprisingly comfortable, sure he was excited but he didn’t seem nervous. Should you not be nervous?
-+꧁ ꧂+-
Qui-Gon shared a fond look with his late master; he wondered if he had looked so amazed when he had come to Ilum all those years ago. He remembered how his hands were so sweaty back then, his kyber cristal almost slipped out on his way back. Dokku had looked so proud of him. He would do the same for Obi Wan , no matter the time it took for him to come back. He was about to break the silence when his master beat him to it.
“Padawan be..”both of them didn’t turn around to face Dooku which he did not appreciate “the door will melt if you do or do not look at it younglings” their 2 little heads snaped back so quick Qui- Qon had to hold back a chuckle. The new padawan clearly took offence to her old youngling title. She always held herself with such passion. From what Qui-Gon knew from working with the younglings, her bond with the force was strong but unpredictable, making her meditation training difficult. He hoped she could conquer that today.
“Be as it is,both of you know by now the responsibility that has fallen upon you” master dooku continued “ to find and bond with your own kyber cristal and take the first step to become the jedi you are meant to be” the short speech different from what Qui-Gon remembered. Dooku changed the words a little, maybe he had forgotten. No matter the case Qui-Gon couldn’t let them enter without warning them he cleared his throat.
“Even without your kyber you should make sure to return in one rotation. You don't want to be stuck for 19 days now do you?” They both answered with a resounding “ no master Qui-Gon” he was still not used to that. The only thing he could do now was wait as the padawan stepped further and further out of sight. His master had already taken to meditating when he snapped out of his nostalgic haze. He sat down next to him to fall into another.
-+꧁ ꧂+-
“So how should we conquer this?” That was the first thing she had said to him since yesterday evening - well more early morning. Obi wan hadn’t expected her to actually talk to him about any of it and it seems that he was right. He wished he wasn’t. Now that Rand was gone he really only had her to go through this with, somewhere a darker part of him wished Rand would have been here instead.
“ We don't have to do this together, you know,” she continued. He could see her in the corner of his eye.“ I could go left and you right at the next conjunction Kenobi” He knew he had hurt her and she wouldn’t let it slide so easily and yet there was an unsettling nervousness radiating off her. Why did she have to be so closed off? Why couldn’t they talk like the others? Why did it always feel like pulling teeth?
"Do you want to?” He asked back, finally looking at her, she was on edge.
Always trying to predict my next move must be exhausting -Obi Wan thought . He wasn't cold hearted, he did feel bad about not asking her to help but he hadn’t had the time. He had caught Rand in the act of sneaking out and he couldn’t lose her. It didn't matter now. He wondered how Qui-Gon would handle this. A small smile forming on his lips at the fact he had a wise jedi master now.
“It doesn’t matter to me” she stated turning away from him “ i will go search over there” and she pointed to a rather small unsuspecting corridor on their right “ you do what you want Kenobi” that was another thing he couldn’t understand, why did she always call him Kenobi? Most anyone from their group called him Obi Wan and in Rand's case she called him Obi. It annoyed him.
He took the other corridor and started looking for green kyber specifically just like his master. He knew he only got one and that he didn’t get to choose but still maybe he was good enough. Maybe he'll get a green saber that matches the faint green eyes he remembered his mother having. Living on Coruscant had given him a lack of the colour; the only bit of green was the uneti tree outside the temple.
He made his way deeper and deeper into the cave. Old mining shafts lay vacant from aeons ago, the only thing connecting them to the cave being strong metal cable. Probably used for pulling carts Obi Wan reasoned despite that there were no carts near him. A colder wind than before blew through making him pull his winter robes closer around him. He followed it back to where it came from. Only to be met with a huge lake completely frozen over. He wondered how there could be wind in a cave. It must be the force calling to him.
He looked around until he saw a faint glow to the other side of the lake. He shuffled across the ice slowly and carefully, stopping near a few rocks that stuck out to look a little closer at the light- it only became brighter and brighter laying right under an iced ledge like a natural roof for such a special cristal. He made short work of the final stretch and finally reached out to the little glistening gem.
Clear like water, a shining blue rock that felt soft like a hug from a lost friend. Sky blue that matched the eyes he saw in the mirror every morning. Before he could stick it in his homemade kyber pocket his head hit the wall with an unrelenting loud thud again and again. He clutched the gem nearer to his heart and tried to focus on what was happening. The shadow cast on the wall before him was gigantic and daunting, horned on the head. This couldn’t be, there were no violent species on Ilum.
His head hit the floor , another thud echoing over the lake. His eyes couldn’t see who or what was attacking him but he felt one restless hand aimlessly trying to grab for his kyber Cristal.
Obi wan dug his nail into the arm of the attacker making it hiss .In the short moment the thing was distracting he moved the gem under him into the hidden pocket in his robe. The monster above him smacked him back into the nearby wall. Obi Wan was slowly losing consciousness with what he assumed must be a pretty bad head injury. The figure brought a fist down onto his stomach making a loud crunch ring out.He was almost sure of his demise when the figure let go of him, tried to search for his kyber one last time with a hiss fled as quickly as it came.
He couldn’t make sense of it until he heard the low echoing noise of running coming closer to him. He could make out a semi familiar call of his last name a few meters away from him. She had come back for him. A steady hand pressed a cloth to the back of his head. He didn’t remember when he had turned himself around exactly or how far they were from help but he knew they needed to get out of here quickly. He just hoped he could convince her.
“ Do you have your cristal?” He slurred a little but he must have been clear enough as an expression of confusion and then annoyance seeped into her face “ No I haven’t, it doesn't matter now. We need to get you back”. Finally they agreed on something. She helped him up slowly, more than half his weight fully leaning on her. “ What about yours?” she asked “ I broke it” Obi Wan slurred somberly.
“ you can't blame yourself for a fall” she stated “ you will come back when you're better and find the most perfect green kyber” she continued. Force,he was barely hanging on now. “Blue” he whimpers between slow breaths “were almost there just a little longer” she picked up the pace resorting to more of a piggyback ride to move quicker.
“ i-i didn’t fall” he gurgled between shallow breaths and loud gasps.
-+꧁ ꧂+-
You didn’t know what to think of that. The head injury was bad; he might have been hallucinating. The only thing that kept you from that easier to consume option was that you knew Obi Wan was one of the better climbers. He was better than you and you wouldn’t have fallen from that ledge. He was also laying under it and not near the edge. Deep down you knew something attacked him but right now you simply needed to get him out of here.
You had doubled back when you had realised that your way had been a dead end. Force, you were annoyed with yourself. You should have sat your pride aside and stayed with him. It would have been a 2 against one, maybe you wouldn’t have had to hear his ragged breathing now. You had wasted time looking in cracks and crevices to not face him again.
You couldn’t handle that self-satisfied smile he had given you. A flare of jealousy had blinded you to the dangers ahead. A selfish desire to have someone here like he had. Qui-Gon looked so proud of his padawan. You wondered if yours would be so happy with you coming back empty handed. A nasty thought that has persisted even now. At least you and Obi Wan would do this again together.
You finally saw the ice door now halfway down.
Qui-Gon came rushing to your side in seconds taking Obi Wan out of your arms and into his own. His eyes frantically scanned the wound. A deep red cash that had bled straight through the bandage you had pressed on it. His auburn hair clumped together with spots of dried and new blood. Master Dooku had come over with a bacta spray and patches. The two masters were speaking to each other while they took care of his head. They padded him down , stopping at the ripped edge of his robe near his chest to dig out a blue kyber cristal from the inner lining . It wasn’t broken. You couldn’t make out the words they were saying until Qui-Gon finally looked at you.
“What happened in there” he said it sharper than he normally spoke.
“He was attacked by something,” you whimpered out. You couldn’t face him, not with Obi Wan laid on the ground like a slaughtered animal.“i-i wasn't there thats all he told me. I promise”
before he could respond Master Dooku cut in “ That's impossible. Ilum has no aggressive species” accusation clear in his tone “It would be the first time something like this happened. Maybe the responsibility of padawan has been misplaced”. You looked back at Obi Wan, he had to wake up and tell them what happened. A low murmur responded, you waited for his defence. It never came.
Qui-Gon had turned himself back to his padawan “ I need to get him back to the ship we can deal with this afterwards”
“But I didn't do it. I promise I wouldn't hurt him” you were stepping away from them, fear welling up. They weren’t going to believe you. Dooku was glaring at you. You couldn’t handle it, you disappointed him. You disgusted him.
“ I know,” Qui-Gon stated as he picked Obi Wan up. He gave a quick nod to Dooku and then he made eye contact with you for just a second but it was unmistakable- the foreign expression from this morning was gone, only dread remained. He stepped closer to the entrance. “ I'm bringing him to the ship. Can you stay with her, master?”
In the silence that followed you were left to wonder what that nod had meant. Did he believe you ? Maybe he was making that clear to Dooku. Why would you attack Obi Wan over a gem?
“Do you have your own kyber cristal?” He laid emphasis on the word “own” like it owed him money.
“No I never found it” you started to back up farther from him,closer and closer to the ice gate “I wouldn’t hurt him i swear”
“ to think I brought you here myself” he stated coldly. It cut deeper than you would have liked to admit. Tears started to drop down your cheeks. You couldn’t take it anymore. Your legs betrayed you before you could think clearly. You turned around and sprinted for the ice gate. Anything to get away from his scorching eyes and their judgement. You knew he was stronger and smarter than you so you kept sprinting deeper and deeper into the cave. Until you came across the ice lake once again.
-+꧁ ꧂+-
He was angry and cold, cold and alone again. A memory of Mustafar's natural warmth flooded his senses. The old window in his room when he was shorter flashed before the ice covered wall. He was still sitting on the ledge, the wounds in his arm long forgotten. His master shall punish him far worse when he gets back to the ship. Shame clawed his way up again.
He was foolish, he should have continued his attack, he should've ripped them apart until he got the kyber. He had heard the crack but he should’ve checked instead he panicked when he heard boots approaching and left. His master had told him that his old apprentice was here as well- he didn’t know how that fit into the rule of two, he could only imagine what would have happened to him if they had met.
He let his head hit the wall, making the horn scrape into it. He was oh so foolish. He should have jumped her when she tried to escape with the other one. Who cares if she didn’t have a cristal he could have given the bodies to his master, that might quell his rage. He didn’t know why he hadn’t.
He was lying to himself. Deep down he was curiously intrigued by the kindness the two padawan had shown each other so effortlessly. He wondered if it was that that made them so soft, so easily defeated and so open. What he assumed was the older one by the height he had on the other was no match at all. Sure his arm still ached a little but he expected more from the jedi.He wondered if his master would ever show anything similar to him.The thought angered him. Maybe his own death would quell his master. It didn’t matter now.
His head snapped up at the faint sound of footsteps approaching. They were the same as last time. Light and flighty - how he could have ever thought it was a grown man was beyond him. He looked to the entrance across the lake. The younger one had returned, unsteady hands wiping at her face. She was distracted by her own emotions- how weak.
Weak but useful. If he played his card right he might still get the kyber. If she could be consoled in some way, she could find hers and he could take it. He didn’t know how to console anyone nor how he could do it while remaining unnoticed. Murder was his only option. He hurried down the ledge while it was distracted and followed the lake further. His bare feet tapped as soft as he could against the thinning ice beneath him.The padawan never went further than the ledge, he would catch it off guard on the ice lake itself.
He made it to the entrance he had used to enter, a hole in the lake that led to the back of the mountain range the kyber cave was part of. He had been dumped there and swam through the small canal to get inside. When he finally emerged in the cave itself, he had noticed a different tunnel that merged with the water canal leading to what he assumed to be the outside since light had fallen through it. Anger had made it impossible to forget. If his master had cared about him he would have let him climb down instead of swim through ice cold water that had made his lips turn purple.
He broke off a part of an icicle that hung near the entrance. No doubt the padawan would hear but it would only work in his favour. He climbed up and jammed the piece of ice to reflect the light to the lake. The sun was still shining but the night was near. He moved closer to the lake again. He would just have to wait a little longer.
He hid in the shadow of the cave mouth. He was used to this part - the hunt. Never had his target been this big before , never had it been so humanoid. It looked like him in some ways - but it wasn’t prepared like him. Every animal can be outsmarted from the flees on Mustafar to the padawan of Corusant-did the 2 planets look alike as well. His mind was going a mile a minute. Again footsteps interrupted him.
His eyes locked onto his prey. Lost in thought like before. In a few minutes he would have something to return with. A participation trophy that would furnish his master's volcanic castle. So distracted that the padawan turned around. There's no honour in attacking the back of your opponent- Maul never cared for honour.
He only noted his mistake when he was too close. Her eyes locked. The metal chain wrapped around her hands swinging for his neck. Her body swinging around catching his quick retreating legs- not quick enough. His air was cut when his back hit the floor. The chain only loosened slightly when she changed her grip to one hand. Her other fist coming down on the side of his head, skin raked open from the horn that rested there.
The pain made him snap back into the fight- she was leering at him. Teeth bare-furiously. He had misjudged her greatly, this was no prey. He was fighting a predator like himself. A creature made for killing just like him. Anger opened in her expression. The effortless kindness she had shown her companion was replaced by rage- corrupted. How long had he been looking at her? When did he start clawing at his neck?
The chain loosened fully, letting a sharp inhale cut its way into his lungs. He kicked her in the face, making an opening to crawl away. She spit out something to the side- a molar from the looks of it. He was standing now. The chain farther behind him.
“Is that how you repay kindness? Scum” she barked so viciously. It angered him. “What kindness would that be?” He hissed back. He wouldn’t underestimate her again. Finding a weakness was all he needed to do for now. “For letting you breathe” she countered.
Just like his master stated, the jedi were arrogant. He launched for her. She blocked his right hand pulling him closer to punch him in the abdomen. A repayment for the other one he imagined. It didn’t matter she left her shoulder open to his left hand, making his claws dig deep into it. She bled red - just like him. She pushed him back to the ground with that same shoulder, picking up his left leg closer to her. This time he was ready, he punched his fist into the side of her face. Repaying his own debt.
A left hook to his chin hit him first before a barrage of fists hit the side of his head. He kneed her in the crotch making her back up a little. Her eyes narrowed at him, he tried to get back up. She pushed him down again, one of her hands going for his head - no it was going behind him. He smacked his head down into her hand under it, making her audible yelp. Then she smiled. He dug his nails deep into her calf . It disappeared.
A crack rang out from under him. The ice was breaking. If he wanted to win it needed to happen now. A blow so hard he felt his own brown bone shatter hit his face. Blood seeped from the wound making it hard to see, still he needed to end this. He brought both his hands up,blindly reaching for her neck. She hit his other eye, he couldn’t see at all now- it didn’t matter. He grabbed her neck, squeezing it shut.
She clawed at his hands but he didn’t let up. He had done this before. Not with a humanoid like himself but with smaller things: rats, snakes, things sent to kill him- just like her. They let go eventually. They chose to go quiet into the good night. But she wouldn’t.He couldn’t predict her. He could only make out shapes through the blood clouding his eyes. He brought her mouth closer to his ear, hoping to hear her final breath.
She raged. He could almost smell it. That faint smell of pennies and iron mixed with the stench of sweat. He had her close enough to feel what was left of her breath fan against his neck. Sharp pain ripped through him as the padawans teeth sunk straight through his jugular. He let go in panic, wiping at his face as he ripped a part from his tunic to put pressure on his bleeding neck. He glanced toward the creature. She spit out the chunk of meat as if the taste had offended her, as if she would have eaten it if she was just a little more desperate. Air was filling her lungs as she inhaled it gluttonous and greedy. She closed her eyes. Raging against the dying of the light. He had to do something now or he would be prey to an unnatural predator of his own creation.
His 2 hearts were beating for 4 as he got back up. Sluggish in movement from the blood he had lost. Blood wasn’t spotting from his neck- she had missed the external vein. He got lucky. He didn't dare to look away from her. He stumbled his way to the chain long forgotten. The ice broke into loose clusters beneath his bare feet. They edged closer and closer to his enemy. Terror flooded her face - she couldn’t get up. A quick glance at the leg he had massacred earlier made that clear. He finally got heavy metal in his hands.
He would not get close to her again. He lifted it above his head and brought it down on the least frozen part he could find. Making the ice beneath them shatter. She was closing in on him again, crawling like a mustafarian Xandank- just as fierce. He brought the metal down again. Fractures forced the once solid lake into ice floes. They were sharing one now. He jumped away from her to a nearby piece of drift ice. He watched as she desperately tried to fight the flipping patch. Until it finally won.
He could finally catch his breath but it didn’t feel like it. An enemy who has pulled strength from anger just like him. A jedi, an equal. He shook his head hoping to rid himself from the thoughts. They didn’t leave. His heart beat plummeted.Guilt flooded his senses , he pressed his hand hard against the bite. She had wounded him- his leg started to itch. She had tried to kill him. She showed him mercy, the thought sent water to his lungs- he felt himself drown on dry land.She smiled at him.
Maul was a fool
———-xxxx————
the second chapter will be up soon after that i will update atleast once a month. Im studying for the most important exam in my life rn have mercy.
Next chapter will end the illum part of the story.
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Part 2 is finally here!! I hope you enjoy it ❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎
So this is part 2 heres part 1 Read on ao3
Wk: 1,8+
Warnings! None maybe like a little angst
The glowing light of the last becta tank finally went dark, announcing the end of your shift. Your coworker should have been here a near hour ago but he wasn’t. Having worked about double the time you were used to, you were absolutely fuming. In spite of that you took a deep breath.
You let the collected tension between your shoulders ebb away while trying to clear your mind. Late colleagues and rude patients turned to the gray fog by the second, it would all be a distant memory tomorrow. Yet a single thought kept persisting. How was that soldier you treated 5 days ago?
It wasn’t the worst injury you had seen this week. Being a healer meant that you were used to quite a lot. Not 3 hours ago you had been elbow deep in an amputation and before that you had to help direct an open heart operation in the main theater on the end of the hall. So it was not the most deadly either .What made this one so special? It was that feeling that you had forgotten something.
Sure you had given Kix the right information for the uninfected wound. Maybe he had caught a mere infection now, that would change the situation greatly. But then again Kix was a professional medic, he would make sure that wouldn’t happen. Why were you so consumed by the need to visit him again?
Perhaps you were simply overworked. An easy thought to connect to for now, you simply had to sit back and let it fade into the fog.You started to prepare yourself for the long way home. Unlike the Jedi, the halls only housed the young and needy. Two things you weren’t anymore. Sometimes you missed the warmth of a given home you had had back then, those big libraries and cozy corners. It didn’t help that your apartment was more than a few levels down, not deep enough to be scared by the vastness of the planet,but deep enough to fear the fate of level 1 one day. You let out a loud sigh at the pure idea of the unwelcoming night. It had been raining for hours now and the streets of this layered city were not prepared for it.
You collected the last of your stuff when you heard a hollow knock followed by a man clearing his throat. You looked over expecting your late bum of a colleague but instead of that you were greeted by that lucky blond soldier.
Rex knew it had been stupid to come over this late. He was supposed to be resting, not that that was possible with his 2 generals constantly teasing him about the medic standing only a few meters before him,engrossed in her packing. Maybe he should be in bed right now. He realized he was nervous but then again he was visiting a doctor wounded. It was his responsibility, he noted to himself reassuringly. He knocked. He had been in bed for the last week,that should be enough right?
You sharply turned around. Your fierce frowning face coming into view. The hour of his arrival was rather late and you were probably tired, he reasoned. The captain was ready for your just anger when a spark of recognition moved through you, you remember him.
A tired smile graced your lips and your face softened.despite the small gesture it hit like lightning. Rex let his arms flop awkwardly to his side. You were as striking as Ahsoka has stated. You leaned back on your desk invitingly.You called over to him but he didn’t catch it. He only knew what you meant by the way you were petting one of the examination tables near you. He hadn’t even noticed when you moved from your desk to there. Maker, he was dazed. He walked over to you.
Your voice finally cleared up to him “Are you listening, sir?” You stated your eyebrows back to their dour appearance.
He snapped back immediately “I’m sorry” he opened way to loudly “I didn’t hear you, miss” he probably looked as nervous as he felt and by the way you smirked at him, you knew.
“y/n, it's fine, and I asked how you were feeling?” Before he could think “Never been better” slipped past his lips. A humorous snort left you. “Well then I pity your life, soldier” you changed back to a lab coat “Rex, my name is Rex” he said calmly for the first time this evening. That brilliant smile, now energetic and confident, spreads across your face again. “Let's take a look then Rex”.
He took the earlier offered seat,observing the room around him. “Do you feel dizzy?” you asked while fiddling with your now discarded bag “No, i'm a little tired but that's all” he felt rather guilty for keeping you here longer. You walked away again getting a nearby chair. You looked back a little hesitant “Your shirt…” your hands made a gesture towards the black tank he was wearing “…it's in the way” you appeared a little flustered even embarrassed. Rex quickly pulled the shirt over his head, winching at the sharp pain that shot up from his abdomen.
You pulled out a few balms and something he didn’t recognise from a drawer in your desk and came back over while your eyes fixated on the blast wound on his abdomen. He felt the blood rush to his face, deep down he hoped you liked what you saw but he wouldn’t admit that.You laid your hand on the table and moved to press your hand near the wound “May I?” He took a second to settle himself more comfortably “Yeah, i’m fine” he tried to muster a reassuring smile.
You pressed down slightly. “You know you don’t have to lie to me right? You got shot I know it hurts” he let out a little laugh “I didn’t want to worry you” you looked back up at him “If you didn’t feel anything that would be worse” you pushed around the wound again and this time he responded more accurately to what he was feeling.
His hands grabbed the leather side of the chair just a little tighter,he let out a groan or two here and there and you don't know if he did it knowingly but he kept his gaze locked with your’s, his golden brown eyes reminded you of the old library you used to visit in the halls. A warmth so bright you had to look away.
“Plus I'm always worried” you muttered beneath your breath. Rex took a second to collect himself. Most medic’s didn’t treat them like that, they didn’t treat him like that. He felt exposed. Worst then back on the field. If you would actually consider him for a moment, it would be a gross neglect to what he knew you to be, too good for him. You deserved better, he knew it from the moment you turned around.
“Is everything fine with the wound?” he broke away from you.
“It's still pretty hot to the touch” you opened up one of the balms and warmed it up between your hands “which could mean there’s an infection coming through” rex let out a sigh “will you have to drain it?”. Draining was used more often since it only needed cheap supplies and it was as quick as it gets but you knew they didn’t use anesthesia outside of big operations. Luckily for Rex, you had a few tricks up your sleeve.
You rubbed the balm around the wound as gently as you could and then you took your master’s necklace and started to focus when you heard a very soft “What is that?” From your patient. “It's just a medallion to focus on. So that i can speed up the healing process a little” he looked more confused than before. “You know the force right?” You tried to figure out how much you needed to say as He nodded his head “Well the healers use it too. We aren’t as force sensitive as the jedi, most of us can't train like them, we can't use telekinesis and all that fancy stuff but we can pick up on it. By focusing on the target and transferring part of our lifeforce we can repair yours” he looked shocked but his fingers grazed the side near the ointment. “The balm is to target the area more accurately” you fiddled with the medallion while you watched the cogs turn in Rex's head.
“Will you get hurt?” He asked, trying to sit up from where you had him pinned down “If I don't overdo it, no” you smiled at him while placing your hands back where they were “I also had years of training you know. It's what I'm made for” You saw him relax as you let the force do its thing. It only took a minute or 5 and it was completely painless for him. “Done” You felt the dizzying feeling in the back of your head. The wound was a little deeper than expected. But after Rex's concern you weren’t going to tell him that.
You moved away from his stomach and sat straight up waiting for Rex to inspect his stomach. “Amazing, does it need to be wrapped?” “No, it's clean and closed. It will sting for a day of 3 but after that you’re fully healed” you moved back to where he sat. “It will leave a scar but then again it makes you look rugged” A look of something you couldn’t quite place glazed over his face and you wondered for a second if you had overstepped.
You normally wouldn’t be so forward but well he started it with all the glances and the dusty redness that insisted on his handsome face. He lifted his arms above his head flexing the muscles he hopefully hadn’t used in a while. Giving away a bright smile he spoke in a more assertive tone fit for a captain of a strong army “It isn't safe to walk alone at this hour let's go together”
“I'm guessing you walked here. Did Kix not tell you to rest?” Your eyes sharpened recalling what he said earlier “Or did you simply not listen again” his confidence faded and all that was left was a sheepish looking smile “I thought the exercise would be good for me…” “Luckily you’re not a doctor” you shided “But what if I walk you back to the ship and then I go home?” You knew it was in 2 different directions but so be it he was still somewhat wounded.
“Then you still walk home alone” Rex indulged himself for a bit “Well i'm not of the habit of taking my work home with me,rex” he laughed “ then I take what I can get” you lifted yourself from the table “Get to it, soldier” you stated plainly taking of your coat.
You both got redressed for the weather outside. Your colleague was now 2 hours late and well you weren’t going to wait on him longer. The blond stood now next to you “Let's go” was all he said dressed in a warm rain jacket. The rain you so dreaded before was rather inviting with the right companion.
Thank you for reading and special thanks to my pookie @catnipaddictt for proofreading this fic and like all my others .
I try to get 3 out a little faster but im stuck between mathematics exams rn
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i just wanted to ask if you could write a Captain Rex x reader where reader is a medic? Thanky you so much i really liked the last fic
POLL WINNER DING DING DING
(thank you for the request ❤︎︎)
In service of serenithy
Medic!reader x Captain Rex
Wc: 1,2k
Tw: light angst and setup
Read on ao3: here!! ->Part2
It wasn't an uncommon sight anymore. Covered in cuts and quickly mended bones, troops staggered out of their ships at the coruscant plaindoc. Wayworn faces that all carried a sole sadness. Maybe they had lost friends and companions or their own blood. Your heart couldn’t help but burn for them. Yet they wore the knowledge that battle would call in a fourth night as a protective shield against their own tears. Brave eyes almost all the same color shined true.
Sure it has shocked you the first time, but after the last 4 months the med-bay got used to it. Some of your colleagues grumbled about the clone’s recklessness, others complained about their medic’s competence. The odd one here or there questions the need to heal a dying army. Almost all saw the downgrade from the hall of healing to army medic as an insult. A strange sentiment for a bunch of healers.
You put on a more welcoming face. All you cared for was to help the wounded, clone or jedi it did not matter. Both had shed blood in the endless war and both carried scar far deeper than skin.Your hands dropped to the bag on your hip. Having been taking in as a child in the halls,you had the time to create your own personal medkit. You skimmed past the bacta patches. They clearly needed more than that.
A clone like many others made his way over with a small wobble to his left leg. You quickly walked over in hope to not burden him. Before you could form a sentence he spoke panicked, “Could you please follow me our captain is in dire need” you nodded immediately.
“I tried to suture the wound as best as I could but we were running low on supplies” the man added while jogging you through the port to a white ship. As you stepped inside you noticed the trooper's medic logo on his arm. That explained why he carried the monster known as guilt with him “Sadly a common problem Sir” Your tongue cut through the claws of the beast leaving the poor medic to breath for a second.
You were brought to a chamber that looked like a very small version of the floor you worked on. By a centered bed there sat a Jedi master you presumed with his padawan. You were confused for just a second, they both looked fine. The medic next to you spoke up once again “General Skywalker, I brought the medic from the heeling halls.” “Thank you kix” as he spoke, the Jedi and his padawan both sat away from the bed. Leaving you space to slide next to the bed.
As you laid your eyes upon the man you quickly started to take the wraps of the cash on his abdomen. You were used to these kinds of injuries, blasts that were strong enough to pierce their breastplates. You opened your medical kit near your hip when a squeaky girl voice spoke up, “Is he going to be alright?” The padawan to your left asked.
You took a second to assess the damage better. “He should be” a wave of relief came over the room. Whoever this man was, he was well loved. You moved quickly cutting open the stitches Kix (as you now know) had inserted. Maker, this man was lucky, as far as you could see no vital organs were hurt. You drained the wound knowing that infection was a painful silent killer. After that, you dressed and tended to the wound. Once you were done you wiped your forehead with your sleeve.
You finally looked over to his face. He was truly lucky. His blond short hair suited him. You could not deny that he was handsome. You quickly avert your gaze to Kix. “Here” you handed him a bottle out of your pack “he should take these 2 times a day for the next 2 weeks” Kix nodded as the Jedi stood up next to him “And make sure to redress that wound every 2 days. If he doesn’t improve in 3 days, bring him in straight away to the med-bay” Kix was about to turn away to what you presume store away the bottle. “Kix” his head whipped around “You did well with what you had. You should bear no guilt” You wanted him to know that. He looked a little less lost. A soft smile appeared slowly as he left the room.
“ How long would it take before he is able to work again?” The jedi to your left asked guilty. Normally who would recommend 3 weeks but you knew they didn’t have time. No one has these days. “ In a week he should be able to stand and the pain should be subdued a little” they both looked hopeful but you couldn’t send a wounded man out “ give him at least 10 days general skyewalker “ the young togruta still looked a little stressed. You gave her a reassuring smile “ he will heal and if you would be sent out before those 10 days, he’s always welcome in the halls of healing”
You took one last glance to the man’s abdomen to check your work of course. The jedi cleared his throat to catch your attention. “Uh, could you take a look at my other men?” He asked while a knowing smirk played on his lips “Of course” you answered far too fast. You walked out to go help the others who only had minor injuries.
Rex woke up groggy. He tried to sit up straight but was held back by a stabbing pain and the sour muscles from the last 5 months of labour.A dumb reminder of an even dumber mistake. Jumping between a crossfire is as stupid as can be . Ahsoka was in the middle of a battle herself when a blast was aimed at her back. He understood that she could have parryd it easily but the risk wasn’t worth it to him.
An image of Kix Frustrated state trying to stitch him up fleshed to his mind. He pulled the blanket off him, expecting a festering wound but instead he found his stomach neatly wrapped in soft, white cotton gauze. Before he could question where those supplies even came from Ashoka rushed in.
“Rex! You’re finally awake!” She yelled excitedly as she raced past the door. He looked back up to her confused by his mended middle. Ahsoka wiggled her eyebrows “That was done by this really pretty medic.” She was about to continue when her face went a little blank “Now that I think about it she didn’t give me her name.” “Y/n” Anakin said smugly as he walked in “but that doesn’t matter. You could always go visit her in the halls of healing” Both of his commanders gushed out in fits of giggles.
Rex was even more confused than before. He knew of the healers, having accompanied Anakin on one of his many injuries. They were the top of the medical world, specifically for the Jedi. Years and years of knowledge filled those halls, when you walked past them (as Rex had done a few times) you could smell the old ink and parchment flowing by. Libraries filled with hopeful students patiently studying their teachers' brilliance with passion that could rival the jedi they so cared for .So why did they help a clone?
Rex ended up too far in his own thoughts again, he didn’t hear Anakin or Ahsoka speak or really anything for that matter. Finally he decided to lay his head back. Sleep would not quiet the storm raging in his head; it would also help his injury.
꧁Masterlist꧂
I am going to make this a tiny series just because its set through a few weeks and otherwise it would be a lot of timeskips and past days.
I hope you enjoyed it and thank you for reading ❤︎︎
Maul x reader who has had a bad day at work. He is just comforting her and telling her it's going to be okay. - Anon
Thank you for your request anon
꧁the (non)promotion꧂
W.c: 0.6k
The rain was drowning out the tears that rolled over your cheeks. You had worked the last 5 weeks for a promotion, to the extent that you had even replanned personal mathers for your work. Today should have been the payoff of it all, no one had put as much time,work or effort and you had even gained a few big clients for the company. You wiped the tear/rain mixture of your face as you neared your front door.
You shuffled through your pockets for your door keys but couldn’t find them. Flipping your bag back over your shoulder, you immediately looked through that as well but to no avail. You let out a desperate sigh and started fiddling with the lock.
To your surprise, it turned and the handle dipped. The door flung open to reveal your allarmed looking suitor with his lightsaber ready in his hands. His face quickly changed to a more sympathetic one while he pulled you into the hallway. The horned man quickly took off your soaked coath and walked towards the kitchen “just stay there, my love” he yelled back quickly.
You rubbed your hands across your arms in hopes of warming yourself. Maul reappeared with towels and a set of dry clothes. He took it upon himself to dry your hair, taking his time softly stroking your head with one of the towels.
You were completely silent from the beginning.having had 3 over hours and no promotion you definitely deserved, you had expected him to be fast asleep. You looked at his face, he mostly looked worried, a little amused but worried non the less. Your lover knew you well, there was no need to tell him about your failure. He already knew.
” I’m proud of you” the sillabels fell from his mouth so easily it almost convinced you. You wanted to believe him but your own insecurities flooded your brain as the streets outside “why” was all you answered. His face fell slightly before he pulled you in a hug. His shirt was slowly getting drenched “why” he repeated “ because you deserve it and i want to “ he stated a little offended as if it was obvious.
He pulled back “ you should get out of those clothes before you catch a cold” he said while making his attempt at a wink, you laughed at it while stripping down to your underwear. Maul fell silent at the sight of you. The rain has left a shiny layer covering your skin, you were ethereal to him. His fixation was broken when you pulled the shirt over your head.
You followed maul into the kitchen/living room, which was covered in sloppily hung decorations. You smiled fondly at Maul, who in return hid his face from you. He cleared his throat “ savage told me you celebrate promotions” you giggled at the idea of your brute of a lover hanging up the carlands and blowing up balloons.
Maul was standing awkwardly in front of the counter. Qwerking up your eyebrow,You gave him a questioning glance. He shuffled a little to the left, leaning further on the table. You walked up to him “what are you hiding?”. Instead of answering you, he tilted his head towards the ceiling avoiding your eyes. He stepped to the side, sighing.
On the counter you found a cake with pink icing that spelled “ congratulations!! you deserve it”. A smile grew on your face as you wiped your finger to the soft cream. You turned to look at Maul and pulled him into a passionate kiss.
Your day might have been awful but atleast it ended sweet.
Rex x reader where he has just come back from a mission with Anakin and he is so stressed and needs to relax. Ani and Ahsoka are intense and he has a permanent head ache because of them.
YES ❤︎︎
❧Thank you so much for the request ☙
꧁𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞 ꧂
Pairing: rex x senator!reader
W.c: 0,8k
Delight filled every step you took back home. You had had a late lunch with Padme in which she had revealed that her husband would be coming home. She had let that secret slip years ago after you had foolishly confessed your love for the captain in his care. If Anakin was returning, so was your lover.
You started to speed up at the thought of seeing him again. Some relatively naive people thought that all clones were the same but you knew better. They would bring up how they all have brown eyes but Rex's eyes caught the light so perfectly that you thought the sun was made for him only. Or how they were all cold soldiers yet late at night no touch could warm you like his. None of them knew how separate the clones were from one another, none of them knew that no one compared to Rex.
You got home before he did. starting to make an easy dinner which quickly turned more lavish and complicated by the thought of the nutritional dense rations the troops ate. You were just done setting the table when you heard the familiar sound of armored boots outside in the hallway. You rushed to the door, opening it to see your tired man standing there with his hand near his head. He said your name softly with the desperation of a gungan on fire.
You pulled him into your shared quarters immediately. Not only was he clearly tired, a relationship with a clone was unwanted by the republic just as much as a jedi by the council. Rex sat himself down on one of the chairs at the table “You shouldn’t have” he spoke quietly. You shushed him gently as you fiddled with his armor, relieving him of the republic's uniform.
kissing the side of his temple, you whispered to him “Eat before it gets cold, my dear”. He was about to take his first bite when his fork hurled to the floor as he flinched to his head, groaning in pain. You should have known from the moment you opened the door, the cluster headaches were back.
You went over to the sink to get a wet towel. Rex looked over at you. Maker how he loved you. The mission had gone on for 2 months longer than expected, leaving both of his generals stressed and agitated. Not wanting them to fight he had stepped in, separating the two. Anakin yelled and screamed the entire way back home and Ashoka kept throwing snide remarks towards her master. In the heat of the moment, they had forgotten about rex proneness to headaches.
On his way home, the stress had gotten to Rex. Worries flung through his head, he had been gone for far too long and hadn’t been able to reach you.What if you had found another, a man with his own face, who could stay by your side weeks at a time. In pure despair he had prayed to any higher power that would listen for you to wait for him. He didn’t know if they would listen to an unnatural creature made for war. The forlorn soldier had nothing to offer you and was too selfish to let you go.
He thought about you, as he waited for his nerves to settle.Your soft voice that calmed him so greatly, your touch that made him feel human. The smile he dreamed of for 3 months. He fell asleep and woke up on Coruscant.
Now he sighed as you laid the warm towel on his forehead. You looked at him expectantly “how was your miss-“ “ I’m sorry i was away for so long” rex interrupted “ i promise that i will take better care of you, my love” he said sorrow clear in his voice. You petted his arm “no man has ever pleased me as you have Rex” you took a moment to collect your thoughts “i wait for you for evermore, if it means to kiss the man i love” you answered honestly. You pulled him into a hug while you brushed your lips to his.
His headache had started to still, Anakin wasn’t screaming, Ashoka was probably sleeping and he was in the arms of the woman he loved. He broke the embrace and took the new fork you had carried with you. He thanked you sweetly and started digging in. The dinner had cooled down but to him it tasted godly. In the end, he asked for his 5th plate, making you giggle.
Rex guided you to your bedroom, it being rather late. He pulled you closer to him, stroking your back tenderly. You were cuddled up into the side of his scared torso fast asleep. Rex listened to your faint snores while he counted his blessings. His headache was over and you were near him.
Tomorrow life would run its course again but for tonight he was at peace, for tonight he was a man with his lover.
I hope you enjoyed it {cause i liked writing it :)} ❤︎︎
I adore the clones. You would have to specifically ask for which one since they all have somewhat different personalities but i would love to do that for you . ❤︎︎
