Since no one is calling the rape scene in episode six of Bridgerton what it is - rape - I have a few things to say.
Simon very clearly tells Daphne to “wait” but she continues. That makes it rape, point blank. Consent can be revoked at any time during the act and if the other person continues, it is rape. It does not matter the genders of the participants, if you have had sexual relations before, or if you are married to your rapist. IF SOMEONE SAYS STOP AND YOU KEEP GOING, YOU ARE RAPING THEM. There is no “gray area” here. She knew what she was doing.
I keep seeing people trying to justify Daphne’s actions and it is disgusting and inexcusable. Yes, Simon was wrong for lying to her about his ability to father children, but THAT DOES NOT MAKE WHAT SHE DID ANY LESS HORRIFYING. Yes, Simon was wrong but that doesn’t mean he deserved to be raped. The show never has Daphne even apologize for raping him. Absolutely gross. And I’m supposed to root for them as a couple after this? Fuck that.
(Also, Daphne’s complete lack of knowledge about how babies are made is historically inaccurate. Regency era young women did by-and-large know where babies came from. But I’m digressing from the point. Regardless, lack of awareness is not an excuse for committing rape.)
Then, I keep seeing people say that the rape was not a rape because “Simon could’ve fought her off if he really wanted to” or “he consented to sex before and seemed into it in the beginning.” NONE OF THIS CHANGES THE FACT THAT IT IS RAPE. Some people are frozen in situations of trauma. They panic. And you can see in his eyes after the rape that he is upset and shocked. Would you ever ask a woman who says she was raped why she didn’t fight her attacker harder, or tell her she must’ve been enjoying it because she didn’t fight him off?
Also, I repeat, CONSENT CAN BE WITHDRAWN AT ANY TIME DURING THE ACT. He tells her to “wait.” She doesn’t listen. It is rape. If the roles were reversed, and a woman told a man to “wait” during sex and he didn’t, would you still have the same response? Simon has the right to determine whether he reproduces or not. The show could’ve had the two of them discuss their opinions on children and Daphne help Simon put his trauma behind him through communication and support. Or - considering the pull-out method is not the most effective - perhaps she could have thought she was pregnant and this could have started a dialogue, with the end result being Simon decided he wanted children after all. This did not need to happen.
There is also the added element that Daphne is white and Simon is Black, which makes her rape of him even more atrocious than it already was. Why should a Black man have to forgive his white wife for raping him? She is not entitled to his body. Fuck that.
And then we have showrunner Chris Van Dusen JUSTIFYING the rape by saying it was “part of Daphne’s journey.” I am disgusted. Every one who took part in writing this scene should be ashamed of themselves.
Reminder that men can be raped. Women can be rapists. Men have the same right to say ‘no’. Everyone needs to listen to and respect their sexual partner. Daphne and Simon’s relationship is not “swoon-worthy” or “romantic.” It is toxic. There is no “gray area” here.
