deadfairy

cool

[mewhoshallnotbe]

What a joke lol, imagine just avoiding things

[mewhoshallnotbe]

Will I be liked after I've been done performing

[mewhoshallnotbe]

At this point it gotta be sabotage, like subconsciously sabotaging you and trying to make you feel shitty

[mewhoshallnotbe]

Why do you feel the need to make comments that would make me overthink knowing dwmn well it's gonna make me feel bad and brush it off as you're too self absorbed

[mewhoshallnotbe]

It's suspicious at this point.

[mewhoshallnotbe]

Talking to your siblings just to realize the problem runs in the family and both of you feel the same things toward life and people

[mewhoshallnotbe]

I couldn't sleep

[mewhoshallnotbe]

I'm isolating myself even more now and I don't feel like leaving the house anymore. I don't wanna see anyone or anything, it's exhausting

[mewhoshallnotbe]

I feel more and more lonely like I'm the only person left in the world

[mewhoshallnotbe]

I went on a night walk today and i felt at peace with nature

[mewhoshallnotbe]

It's time for a rebrand and take control, enough

[mewhoshallnotbe]

If my brain doesn't, my body and soul and heart will remember

[mewhoshallnotbe]

50 posts!

50 more to go yaaaas

[mewhoshallnotbe]

I think it's time for me to reassemble myself, I will get to know me and what I like and what I hate and I'll get to experience life again through my gaze. I won't care for other people or what they think or like anymore, I will unapologetically be me

[mewhoshallnotbe]

How do I recollect myself and get to know myself better. Do I still have time to do so ?

[mewhoshallnotbe]

You could call it loser syndrome, but I'd choose to lose every time. It's easier that way.

[mewhoshallnotbe]

Today, we're discussing detaching and dissociating ! Something i picked up as a kid to protect myself from unnecessary hurtful things, but now it translated into a lack of boundaries. You can recognize being disrespected and insulted by why do you get ^over^ it quickly and forget it but the feeling still lingers and has its claws deep inside you and it keeps snowballing and getting bigger, and something interesting happens after. I call it the AVALANCHE. Referencing mitski when memories snow. I like to think I'm over it, and I escaped it all, but I feel it melting on my forehead. The warmth I'm in and indifference is an illusion, and then bam, snow falls on top of me, and I have to shovel my way up again. The cycle continues but how do I fix it and how do I get my boundaries up again hmm