medical field stereotypes - more!
General Surgery: “bro’s club”; hierarchical and narcissistic, but literally able to cure disease with their own hands; they have the job everyone wants but at the cost of a hostile residency that deters all but the most hard-headed of medical students. Consider this competitive field if you really, really like cutting thing and can’t be convinced otherwise.
Obstetrics-Gynecology: “gunners”; aggressive and catty, but by far the most well-rounded in terms of balancing medical knowledge with surgery and inpatient hospital with outpatient clinic work; they have by far the worst residency hours, but once they get through it, they live their dream lifestyle. Consider this field if you want to be good at everything and have a saint for a spouse.
Pediatrics: “kiddos”; tired and borderline depressed, these baby-loving physicians maintain their childhood hobbies and interests in an effort to keep their world from completely losing its innocence in the face of zealous parents, congenital malformations, child abuse and death. Consider this field if you love babies and are a masochist.
Psychiatry: “not to be confused with Psychology”; they’re often considered unambitious and vain, but they are actual physicians with a social life(!); they’re generally made fun of for having the “least medical knowledge” but they really couldn’t care less. Consider this field if you find psychology fascinating, but want to also be able to prescribe medications at the cost of sacrificing your twenties and a quarter of a million dollars to medical school and residency.
Family Medicine: “jack of all trades, master of none”; these physicians have a very broad wealth of knowledge encompassing pediatrics, internal medicine, and ob-gyn, but in exchange, their understanding of these topics are shallow and so they are made fun for “not being as smart”; they live a good lifestyle in exchange for being underappreciated. Consider this if you would like to join the dwindling and very much needed front line team that helps prevent unnecessary hospitalizations and ED visits or if your low self-esteem/ambition is such that you don’t think you can handle Pediatrics, Internal Medicine, or Ob-Gyn.
Emergency Medicine: “jocks”; impatient go-getters, all these athletically-inclined docs want is to figure out how to get you out of their emergency department by figuring out (1) is it going to kill you? (2) if not, can you go home?; given its fast pace, it’s no wonder this field has one of the highest burnout rates. Consider this if you’re an adrenaline junky who wants to do a little bit of everything from pediatrics to orthopedics, but only enough to stabilize them and not have to deal with the aftermath.
Internal Medicine: “smarty-pants”; arrogant and proud of their intelligence, these surprisingly indecisive physicians are constantly torn between their ambitions and how burned out they are. Consider this if you love learning about Medicine, but you really don’t know what you specifically like and you guess this residency will buy you three more years to figure that out.
Pathology: “nerds”; these sci-fi-loving dungeon-crawlers were more into petri dishes than patients, but they aren’t antisocial and are easily excited by people who share their interests; ask them to show you their curriculum vitae (binders). Consider this if you’re more into visual pattern recognition and textbook learning rather than dealing with snotty/sneezy people and you don’t get seasick easily (when you have to deal with someone else driving the microscope, you’ll understand this warning).
Neurology: “the quiet ones”; these soft-spoken, highly intelligent people have a bit of an eccentric side to them and always seem to have one particular hobby they enjoy doing alone such as raising goats. Consider this if you’re fascinated by the map of the brain and still have enough patience to regularly deal with drug-seeking behavior.
Dermatology: “chill”; gifted and lazy; it’s inexplicable how easily these physicians differentiate between a hundred similar rashes and they fully take advantage of this seemingly inborn talent. Consider this field if you have a knack for identifying skin disorders, enjoy (minor) surgical procedures, and want to work a cush 9-5 job with holidays and weekends off.
Radiology: “the popular kids”; intelligent and charming, radiologists are laid back, easy to get along with, and have a serious love-hate relationship with their dictation software; they worked very hard to match into their prelim program and now that their effort paid off, it’s time to eat, drink, and travel. Consider this highly competitive field if you were at the top of your class and now you want to reap the benefits.
Radiation Oncology: “geniuses”; after having devoted half of their lives/souls to research, these doctors are beyond intelligent and have an alarmingly dark sense of humor; it’s a relief that they’re devoting their brilliance towards good rather than evil; while they welcome challenges and debates, don’t expect to win as even their vocabulary far exceeds yours. Consider this incredibly competitive field if you are interested in obtaining multiple doctorates and do not mind drowning in debt for a decade or so.
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