Cat: The Pants
Owner: Mama Pants
Appearance: A
A dilute tortoiseshell, The Pants takes high marks for her bright green eyes and pristine white ruff. She rocks tiny white mittens up front, and white go-go boots on the back paws. She has more belly than any cat ever has had. So much the belly.
Not pictured: her mighty hindquarters.
Sociability: B
The Pants plays pretty hard to get. But once you have answered her questions three and proven that you are not very loud, she will leave behind her under-the-chair bomb shelter and allow you access to chin and belly. And then you are her devoted slave forever.
When it’s just Mama Pants or one of her other favored humans about, she is basically a dog. She follows, yells, chats, and more or less makes a furbuddy of herself.
Usefulness: B
Define useful. She is extremely talented at fetching and catching, which is entertaining for me but may not technically have any other use. She is an expert kneader of blankets, sofas, and human bellies. She can also distress furniture in the blink of an eye.
But she is also the Best Cat Ever (sorry other cats), and that kind of surpasses her general uselessness to me.
Huggability: A
The Pants spends most nights wrapped around my head or tucked in against my stomach. She will also sit on my lap and be hugged while I use the computer. In the proper mood, she even hugs back, putting her paws around the neck of a Chosen Human.
Overall Grade: A-
The Best Cat.