Mindful Motherhood

Sam | 25 | Mommy & Bonus Mommy 🌙Livin’ Life on the Graveyard Shift 🌙

[mindfulmotherhood]

Too Much Stuff

March 7, 2020

I am so sick of looking at all of our junk. There’s just so much of it in piles all over the house and nowhere for it to go. Stacks of baby clothes, mountains of mail, a basket of unfinished craft projects, a pile for important documents. Everything is so chaotically organized. Nothing has a place but we know the general location of where everything is. I’m stuck between wanting to toss it all and being too exhausted to do it after working all night. I feel like I need a few days off to work on it, but that’s not going to happen any time soon. I hate when our house gets like this because it makes me so anxious. I don’t know if it’s a spring cleaning bug or what, but I know I’d feel so much better if I could purge it all. Maybe some day this week...

[mindfulmotherhood]

One year difference!

March 1, 2019 we were on our way home from our Vegas honeymoon, and announced our baby’s gender before getting on the plane.

March 1, 2020 we now have a nearly 7-month-old and she is definitely a little princess!

[mindfulmotherhood]

PSA

DON’T Get Pregnant / Get Someone Else Pregnant...

• BECAUSE YOU THINK IT WILL FIX YOUR RELATIONSHIP

• BECAUSE YOU THINK IT WILL MAKE THE PERSON YOU SLEPT WITH STAY WITH YOU

• JUST BECAUSE SOMEONE ELSE YOU KNOW DID

• BECAUSE YOU THINK IT’LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING THAT WILL LOVE YOU 24/7

Creating another life will not fix yours.

[mindfulmotherhood]

Parenthood is...

Having kids’ show tunes stuck in your head, on repeat, forever.

[makkleyn]

[mindfulmotherhood]

[mindfulmotherhood]

Contentment

Your cheek is rested so delicately on my shoulder, as you lay snoozing peacefully on my chest for your afternoon nap. One hand is wrapped around the back of my neck and the other is draped down my arm, loosely grasping my shirtsleeve. You let out a sleepy little sigh and your perfect, long eyelashes flutter momentarily as you turn your head into the space between my chin and chest. I take it all in. Your arm around me, your scent, your soft snores, your chest rising and falling, the weight of you. You feel heavy already, but I know some day soon I’ll miss when you were this light.

This is all I ever wanted. For as long as I can remember I wanted to be a mother, to have my own family. 6 months down, and at times it’s still so surreal to me that my dreams are now my reality. I hold you a little tighter to me. This is everything. For the first time in my life, I feel content.

[mrjke]

[throughtheeyesofmyself]

[bounemr]

i don’t think we acknowledge enough that when children want to be treated “like adults” what they really mean is “like people”

this is just my own observations of course but 90% of the time when a kid tries to get people to treat them like an adult, what they really want is the respect and acknowledgement that they associate with adulthood - because that’s what they must give the adults. they have to give that to the adults in their lives, but the adults never give that same respect back, and so they see that difference and decide that they want to be treated “like an adult”

and sometimes i see parents who are like fine you want to be treated like an adult then you can work and pay rent but that’s the exact OPPOSITE of what the kid is actually asking for. you’re just belittling them, clearly intending to punish them for daring ask for your respect, clearly intending for them to break down and beg to be “treated like a child” again because you purposefully twisted their wants. they ask for respect, and you give them abuse.

never, ever, ever, treat a child like a full grown adult. it’s our responsibility as adults NOT to, because they ARENT adults no matter how much they think they want to be, and it’s our job as adults to take care of them.

that said, ALWAYS treat children like people. because they ARE that. they’re real people with real agency acting as best as they know to with what knowledge they have

it’s not a matter of kids trying to grow up too fast, it’s a matter of kids wanting to be treated like people instead of objects or pets.

[teaboot]

I hate, hate, hate, hate, HATE it when other adults get after me for 'talking to that kid like an adult'. They say, 'it's not age appropriate'.

Let me be clear: I DO NOT discuss things that are topically inappropriate for a child's age. Ever. Sex, despair, pain, death, and trauma are Off. The. Table.

So, what is it we talk about? Easy: Science.

A 10 year old girl asked me, "Why do we have blood?" And I told her, "Well, do you know what your blood does?" She said no, so I told her, "Your blood's job is to carry air to your brain when you breathe. If your blood can't get oxygen to your head fast enough, and you can get dizzy or faint. You need blood so that the air you breathe can go where it's needed".

The other adult in the room decided I shouldn't be talking to a child 'like that'. Said it would 'just go over her head'. "Look, she's not even listening!"

"No, I'm listening," she said, but the conversation was over.

Kids aren't dumb. They WANT to be talked to with respect for their autonomy and intelligence.

Am I going to start breaking out words like Mytosis or Rhinoplasty without explanation? Of course not. But if they want to know why their nose is called a "Rhino-", I'll tell them.

I REMEMBER adults telling me I was too young or not ready to learn something I was interested in. I REMEMBER being told to grab easier books, to be at peace with addition when I WANTED to try division.

I remember for getting detention because a TA told my class to sit down and be quiet and I told him, "You're standing up and yelling at us, why don't you have to follow the rules?"

I remember telling a teacher to stop being condescending, only to get a funny look and, 'what a big word! Do you know what that means?' As if I'd just throw it out there if I didn't think I knew how.

Adults tell you what to do and say that it's for a good reason, but the reason can't possibly be that good if even THEY don't follow it all the time.

Adults tell you that not eating your veggies is rude and unhealthy, but you've never seen greens on your father's plate in your life and nobody gets after HIM. Why are you the only one who has to do things you don't like? If you're rude, why isn't he?

And when you're *really* young, that's the WORST, because everyone wants to *quiz* you on shit. "Can you say 'school' sweetheart?" Yeah, I can, lady. I was doing something, though, so can it wait? I knowsyou're just gonna keep picking words. This can't possibly be fun for you.

Ughghgggghhf. I could be mad about this all day. I don't want to be another one of the adults I had to put up with

[oh-no-oh-no-oh-nononono]

FINALLY someone put it into words. I see other adults treating minors and kids like they don’t have agency- like their emotions and wants and opinions aren’t worth their (the adults) time and consideration. It makes me so angry. -A

[mindfulmotherhood]

[mindfulmotherhood]

A little self care

Feb 11, 2020

Yesterday, thanks to a little help from my husband, I was able to take a full shower and a nap afterward. It wasn’t anything spectacular or grand, but it left me feeling so rejuvenated for the rest of the day. I can’t remember the last time I was able to take a shower without worrying how quickly the baby would get fussy, obsessively peeking outside the curtain to check the monitor while she napped, or stumbling out in a hurry before getting to shave my legs or put conditioner in my hair. I let the hot water melt the muscles in my shoulders, then let the rest of myself melt into our bedsheets. I slept for HOURS. It was so odd to wake up on my own, without the prompting of lonely, restless cries. I actually almost panicked in my still-half-asleep state, “I woke up before her? Is she still breathing?!” only to look at the empty crib on the monitor and remember that she was playing happily downstairs with her daddy. I can’t believe how renewed I felt, both mind and body, after taking care of such basic human needs. I definitely needed it. In the future I’ll have to remind myself to do this a little more often. ♡

[mindfulmotherhood]

🎀 𝒮𝒾𝓉𝓉𝒾𝓃’ 𝓅𝓇𝑒𝓉𝓉𝓎 🎀 (at Latrobe, Pennsylvania) https://www.instagram.com/p/B8XcQIOAGFL/?igshid=sglgbm8rg2w8

[andimthedad]

Things Adults Learn

It wasn’t until we were in our 30s that my wife and I learned how to use chopsticks. The kids wanted to learn, and we thought it would be cool, so we all learned together.

My younger self would have thought it silly, if not strange, that I now have a set of fancy permanent chopsticks in the kitchen drawer alongside forks and spoons and knives, and that are used several times a month. But why not? A thing is only foreign until you’ve tried it; then it is merely different.

What have you learned as an adult simply because you had a curious kid?

[mindfulmotherhood]

Because of my stepson, I now know so much about sea life, trains, battle bots, and basically everything that has been changed any time there’s been an update to Minecraft 😂

[mindfulmotherhood]

Credit: @karacandraw

[appreur]

[mindfulmotherhood]

“Whitney” by Kathryn Morris Totter

@ktotterart on Instagram